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Did You Marry in a Catholic Church? If not, You Can and Should!
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- Опубликовано: 2 июл 2021
- Are you married? Where did you get married? Did you know that baptized Catholics are obligated to marry in a Catholic Church in order to enter a valid marriage? If you married outside the Catholic Church I invite you to exchange vows in the Catholic Church. A valid marriage opens one up to immense graces. We are here to help you! Check out this video. Share it with a friend. For those at St. Mary parish in Huntley, give us a call at our office 847-669-3137 or email me at frditomo@stmaryhuntley.org
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Where can one find where the Church law/Canon law mentioned in the video. I’d love to get more info, this is very interesting information. God bless you
My fiancée and I are both catholic, middle-aged, and never before married. You’d think this would be cut and dry.
My first issue is the length of time it takes to get married. I know some parishes were telling couples that the process of getting married can take up to a year. All of a sudden classes are required when they weren’t of previous generations. Sorry, but we don’t have time for this. My fiancée and I live in different countries and when she gets here, she has 90 days to get legally married or she’ll be deported. She’s also a cancer survivor so marrying and getting her on my insurance as fast as possible is a priority.
Second, I’m really turned off by solicitations for donations. The dimension of money layered on top of this cheapens everything for me. While technically people are told that these are voluntary and that the sacrament is free, in reality I believe that the sin of simony is occurring.
Third, it seems off to me that something of such grave moral consequence applies unless some bureaucratic/administrative process of dispensation is pursued. Did I hear the example correctly? Dispensation for a catholic to marry in a Protestant church (aka those that protest Catholicism). Before we are told we better take marriage seriously, shouldn’t the church take it seriously? We condemn divorce but hand out annulments like candy. We tell young couples to get married the right way and start families but bless openly gay couples in the blink of an eye.
If churches expediently perform modest sacramental weddings simply at the request of a catholic couple, then I’d be all for it. Sadly, I’m noticing that this isn’t the case, predominantly in in the west where woke ideologies and the need to maintain congregation numbers/ revenue seem to be the driving forces.
I’ve toiled over this for a year now. I hope the Catholic Church gets better leadership because something is very very wrong.
So, to answer a few of your questions or points of contention, as a married Catholic who NEEDS a convalidation, the Church has a process for EVERYTHING and for good reason. With proper preparation people know what they’re getting into whether it be marriage, Baptism, Confirmation, etc. there are classes for all. And with classes, there’s less likelihood of failure. As for the church handing out Annulments like candy as you said, that couldn’t be farther from the truth. Tbh, even in the most extreme cases of first hand Catholic annulments I’ve witnessed, where both participants want to be divorced THATS what takes easily up to a year. It can be shorter or longer depending on the cooperation of their ex spouses, etc. but I assure you and promise, the Church does not hand these out like candy. As for your finance and yourself, if they are Catholic, they can (and should) begin marriage prep at their local Parish, this is definitely doable and possible, for you both to get prepared for married life together and to have that same strength and support for a successful, lasting marriage. It will also doubly help if your finance happens to speak a different language, for them to understand the Sacrament and the Church’s teaching in their own language, so when they arrive here, those 90 days you have can be spent focusing on putting your wedding together here physically. Talk to your Priests! They’re there to help! Also remember, Priests outside of Mass and other Sacraments are also humans, so some do have bad attitudes for lack of better words. Do not be discouraged. Our faith is so, so, so beautiful and enriching to married and family life as well as, single life. The Church and God loves you! And your finance. Don’t be turned off by processes that are there for your good and benefit. I assure, it’s not to make your life harder but BETTER. I am also a Catholic convert and so it took me over a year (9 months of classes but more time discerning and praying did guidance) to become a Catholic, and the waiting time is nothing compared to the joy and fulfillment our faith brings to my life (and I already came from a deeply religious faith and family). You’d think it’d be cut and dry because it is cut and dry. You and your finance can and should do this! I am so happy for you and praying for you guys, no matter your decision. Again, as I said, I NEED a convalidation as we were married during the pandemic and I had already become pregnant outside of marriage (shocker. Sinful people being sinful, I know lol) and needed to be on my soon to be husbands better insurance than what I had to cover medical appointments. Unfortunately, I lost that baby, and the next after we were married. But have since gone on to have one child with another on the way now. The Church has nothing but enriched all of our lives. And we’re both Catholic (my husband is Baptized, but not practicing which is the reason for the hold up on his end), and never before married. It would’ve been simple then, though it would’ve taken like you said time. It’s ok, it’s going to be ok. Gods grace and love are always, always, always there for you, if only you seek it. Good luck
Oh! And a donation is just that, a donation. It’s not a scam or ploy to get money. You also choose to donate an affordable amount when getting your babies Baptized. It’s really an appreciation for their time and efforts outside of the actual Sacrament portion that you’re valuing with a financial contribution. There’s no set amount or expectation. If you’re flat broke or don’t know about it even, no one says or bats an eye
Convalidation was one of the most infuriating things I’ve ever experienced in my life. Most because my now ex-wife was terribly uncooperative. It’s like they make up these rules without thinking of any of the real world implications.
That was a beautiful video. Thank you Father.
I guess one thing I am confused about after watching this video is that can’t you follow the Lord God and do your best to serve him unless you are doing it the Catholic Churches way? To someone who isn’t exposed to the Catholic Church but reads scripture and devotes time to prayer and trying to be the best Christian that doesnt count cause it’s not the specific Catholic way?
Your thoughts have been very helpful ✝️❤️. Grace of the sacrament of marriage through the eyes of God .
Unfortunately, my husband got prostate cancer after we were civilly married for 5 years. We went through the classes for annulment for past marriages which were annulled. Even though we told the priest about him being impotent because of the cancer he failed to tell us that we could never be married in the site of God. We live as brother and sister aka no sex. It's hard and hurts beyond understanding. My husband still went through RCIA and became catholic despite our marriage never being allowed.
Then after the annulment, if he became a Catholic, then you all should be able to get married. If not both, the MAN has to be a confirmed Catholic and you have to promise to raise your children Catholic.
@@MarkelBeverley - I thought only one of the two of the couple had to be Catholic, not just the Man. I've never heard that only the man had to be a confirmed Catholic. That doesn't make sense.
@@SweetThing Both do *not* have to be Catholic because they as still a man and a woman as designed by God. However, since the man is the priest of the home or leader of the home, he must be Catholic for them to marry and they have to agree to raise the kids Catholic. It is still highly advised to marry within your faith.
*Now, I am going off of what I was taught in the East (Syriac Church). Also, I was actually told this by a Priest of the Latin Rite Years ago it is possible it has changed*
Thank you Father, you’re the first person I could find that explains what to do if you got married without a dispensation.
My husband, baptized Catholic, was previously married outside the Catholic church. I want to convert to Catholic, was also previously married outside the church. My husband and I were married outside any church at all, no blessings of any kind. What order would I need to convert, get annulments, etc? Would we be allowed to get married in the Catholic church after all that is done? I think renewing our vows correctly would be amazing!
Great information.
Thank you for all this knowledge Father! I know you mentioned being in a valid marriage is a church law and requirement for those of us who are baptized Catholic, but is there a specific book or chapter in our bible where god demands this from us?
Check the Catechism. It’ll be there for sure 🥰 we are not sola-scriptura as Catholics (or rely on the Bible alone)😊
I went through an annulment a few years ago. Then after years decided to get married again in the Catholic church. He was not baptized I was so we had to go through alot of red tape for it to be valid. He had already been civil married but she was catholic so we got all this got figured out. 2 years after my marriage I am now have to seperate from him. Because he abused my girls. So I'm so hurt that I don't even want to go through all the divorce an annulment again!. Please pray for me and help me out with this situation. What should I do. For now there is only seperation I'm moving out. This just happened 3 months ago. But the abused happened 6 years ago. I want to do what pleases the Lord I have forgiven him and my girls are working on that too. They are adults now.
Exactly the reason you shouldn’t ever get divorced
What was the reason for your initial divorce ??
Praying for you. That sounds incredibly difficult. 1000% speak to your Priest to ask for guidance.
The comments that I read some are definitely a solid reason in my mind NOT to be Catholic, also the 10 Commandments are not suggestions and it distinctly says the 7th Day is the Sabbath of the Lord your God. Which day is Sunday? Which day is Saturday? Who changed the Sabbath of God to the sabbath of the Catholic faith? Answer: the Catholic Church in the year 336 AD changed the “Solumnity” from the Seventh Day to the First day. SO the Sabbath of God is Saturday, the sabbath of the Pope is Sunday. History check to see if I lie!
Yes, the Catholic Church has the Authority…. The Gregorian calendar that you use to this day was thanks to the Catholic church. So whether you like it or not it or not, you submit to the Catholic Church.
Dang! You caught us! I guess I’ll have to change to Protestant now, shucks… 😕
We got married in a Christian church but the Catholic Church we visited last Sunday said we are fornicating until we are married in a Catholic Church but I was baptized catholic. Christian is mentioned in the Bible several times but catholic isn’t mentioned once.
Another that is extremely wierd is that most Catholics in Philippines do not know what Christian means. It’s in the Bible. More than one Catholic there has asked me if I believe in Jesus or read the Bible. They literally never heard of the word Christian!! They only know the word Catholic
Marriage is a covenant which is formed by vows and nothing else. Canonical form did not even exist as a requirement for the vast majority of the catholic church's existence. One of the reasons it started was due to clandestine marriages. That is a moot issue today but they still use it as a loophole just like all of the other annulment loopholes they have created to give people a backdoor way out of a marriage without calling it a divorce.
God does not care more about technicalities like the location of a wedding or who was there than he cares about the actual vows and the families and children who are abused by annulments.
If it was a first marriage for both of you, then it is valid.
This rule makes no sense.
Please also include radical sanation for retroactive canonical effect if it applies to that couple. Thank you!
I’m a baptized, communion and confirmation Catholic , and my fiance is non-Catholic he is Muslim. Can I still marry at a Catholic Church for my part? And take holy communion for my part?
Dear Fr, I want to know if the couple is Roman catholic and is pregnant before marriage and wants to get married in the church before the baby is born. Will the priest get them married asap ?
I dont have all my sacraments
But im married by civil court I was told by the receptionist that I would have to get marry by the church first in order to get my sacraments. Is that right? I thought sacraments like the first communion and confirmation.
Son is marrying a beautiful non-Catholic gal who is sweet. Thankfully they are getting married in the Church. No mass, but we wonder about the best way to proceed as Catholic parents to get them off on the right foot etc. We pray that perhaps our daughter in-law may convert to the one true faith.
Why not just follow God’s Word, also known as the Bible?
That's too easy. JESUS said His yoke is easy and His burden is light. They would rather give you hard yoke and heavy burdens 😢
Annulment are not biblical
Thank you #marriage
Hi father,I'm a bit confused,I hear you say that you need 2 witnesses and a priest or decon and in the church for it to be valid ,now I also heard that if you were married in a protestant church it is also valid you Just need to be baptized,is this true?
If you or your spouse were baptized Catholic then you would need to marry before a priest or deacon and two witnesses in a Catholic Church. If both parties are not Catholic, then any way you marry (in a Protestant church, before a judge, etc.) and the marriage would be presumed to be valid.
@@StMaryCatholicChurchHuntleyThat is extremely confusing. What is the reasoning behind this? What if someone was baptized into the Roman Catholic Church as an infant, but was never catechized or confirmed.
Just more reason why Catholicism is a false religion preaching, "another Gospel," other than the gospel found in the Bible. Jesus lived a perfect life, died a sinners death, resurrected from the dead, and is coming back for His own. Saved through faith alone by grace alone and not through works of sacraments.
Faith with out works is nothing.
In order to get the fullness of the one true faith which is the Catholic Church a person needs to get ask the Holy Spirit to help. All books are contained in the Catholic Bible. So if your Bible is missing books you have only partial truth.
This is one of the reasons why I am leaving the Catholic Church 🫢😟
A real Catholic does not leave Jesus in the Eucharist. I no other faith will you find the true Body, blood, soul, and divinity. Get to know your faith. After this short life there is an eternal life.
@@beatricepulidoExcept for the Orthodox and Anglican churches....although I'm sure you'd say just the Orthodox also do...