Hey Mark. I’ve been using your meditation videos lately. I always doubted that mindfulness would help me but I was wrong! So thank you for those, along with everything else you do. I think a huge part of this is “letting go”. I can’t fight thoughts/anxiety with desperation, I have to accept them and trust myself and my behaviors. I feel like a lot of anxiety/OCD/brain stuff for many people can be denial/desperation. Denying thoughts, what they could mean, controlling possible outcomes, trying to get intrusive thoughts to go away, etc… my brain is like “Okay, I’m not evil, but what if I’m SECRETLY evil?” but I’m not on trial. Who am I defending myself to? I have to let go of chasing understanding and certainty and trust in my decisions and actions in real life and not stuff in my head. That being said, changing some behaviors is another piece (eliminating compulsions, stealing happiness). ~5 months ago I believed a lot of irrational, horrible worst case scenario things about myself and my future. It’s still difficult but I don’t hate myself anymore. Seeking help saved my life and putting in the work has kept me going. I really hope everyone suffering from OCD/anxiety is able to see through the fog long enough to give themselves the time & love to retrain their brains and live life.
Hey Mark, ive just done a compassion/meditation course. It really helped me to be more kinder to myself. I liked it so much that I signed up for a weekend silent meditation course. But now my brain is coming up with lot`s of things. `what if I become psychotic in this weekend` - `what if I loose my mind` - `what if I can`t handle the silence`. I can clearly see that I feel insecure and unsafe doing something new. My approach would just be to experience this new thing while being insecure. Am I right?
Hey Koen! That is wonderful you're exploring kindness to yourself! Checking for reassurance about whether you're doing the right thing is an example of a classic reassurance checking compulsion. So I'd look more broadly than just the question about doing a silent meditation weekend and whether the right approach is to do a new thing while insecure. If I'm feeling insecure, that's a great opportunity to practice kindness and compassion. I'd be curious about what else I'm doing that might be creating insecurity, or whether there are things around me that are fueling that. I'd be curious about any other controlling and avoiding, especially related to anything I fear could disrupt life or make me lose control.
Hey Mark I just have a question, when you complete erp and you are able to kill the ocd monster, what happens to the obsessions that you thought about before? There is one obsession that I just can't imagine not caring about, do they just go away after? Like they just don't have any meaning?
You caring about something is an action. It could help to see there are only compulsions. Obsessing about something is a compulsion. An obsession doesn't fall out of the sky. If we're judging something as a problem we want to control, that's us doing that. Just like you don't do that to many other things. For example, you probably know other people have things they obsess about that are different than what you obsess about. So you can see that there are topics you don't obsess about. If you look at why you obsess about one topic and not another, you can see the compulsions.
Hey Mark. I’ve been using your meditation videos lately. I always doubted that mindfulness would help me but I was wrong! So thank you for those, along with everything else you do. I think a huge part of this is “letting go”. I can’t fight thoughts/anxiety with desperation, I have to accept them and trust myself and my behaviors. I feel like a lot of anxiety/OCD/brain stuff for many people can be denial/desperation. Denying thoughts, what they could mean, controlling possible outcomes, trying to get intrusive thoughts to go away, etc… my brain is like “Okay, I’m not evil, but what if I’m SECRETLY evil?” but I’m not on trial. Who am I defending myself to? I have to let go of chasing understanding and certainty and trust in my decisions and actions in real life and not stuff in my head. That being said, changing some behaviors is another piece (eliminating compulsions, stealing happiness).
~5 months ago I believed a lot of irrational, horrible worst case scenario things about myself and my future. It’s still difficult but I don’t hate myself anymore. Seeking help saved my life and putting in the work has kept me going. I really hope everyone suffering from OCD/anxiety is able to see through the fog long enough to give themselves the time & love to retrain their brains and live life.
Thanks for sharing about your journey! It's great you're taking on these skills and seeing how to apply them in your life. Enjoy the adventures ahead!
Brilliant as always
Thank you!
Hey Mark, ive just done a compassion/meditation course. It really helped me to be more kinder to myself. I liked it so much that I signed up for a weekend silent meditation course. But now my brain is coming up with lot`s of things. `what if I become psychotic in this weekend` - `what if I loose my mind` - `what if I can`t handle the silence`. I can clearly see that I feel insecure and unsafe doing something new. My approach would just be to experience this new thing while being insecure. Am I right?
Hey Koen! That is wonderful you're exploring kindness to yourself! Checking for reassurance about whether you're doing the right thing is an example of a classic reassurance checking compulsion. So I'd look more broadly than just the question about doing a silent meditation weekend and whether the right approach is to do a new thing while insecure. If I'm feeling insecure, that's a great opportunity to practice kindness and compassion. I'd be curious about what else I'm doing that might be creating insecurity, or whether there are things around me that are fueling that. I'd be curious about any other controlling and avoiding, especially related to anything I fear could disrupt life or make me lose control.
Hey Mark I just have a question, when you complete erp and you are able to kill the ocd monster, what happens to the obsessions that you thought about before? There is one obsession that I just can't imagine not caring about, do they just go away after? Like they just don't have any meaning?
You caring about something is an action. It could help to see there are only compulsions. Obsessing about something is a compulsion. An obsession doesn't fall out of the sky. If we're judging something as a problem we want to control, that's us doing that. Just like you don't do that to many other things. For example, you probably know other people have things they obsess about that are different than what you obsess about. So you can see that there are topics you don't obsess about. If you look at why you obsess about one topic and not another, you can see the compulsions.
Hi Mark, how can someone join the discord?
If you send me a message on Instagram instagram.com/markwfreeman or my website, I can share an invite link
@@everybodyhasabrain thank you !!