What are your thoughts on this episode? Get my free Reading List of 100 life-changing books here - chriswillx.com/books/ Here's the timestamps: 00:00 Bridget’s Controversial Writing 04:46 Will Gen X Experience Divorce More? 07:34 Unforeseen Consequences of Divorce 18:12 The Pushback From Bridget’s Article 26:37 People Needing to Defend Their Position 35:05 Relying on People Who Sound Certain 44:15 What Do Normies Actually Know & Think About? 47:04 How Has the Culture War Changed? 1:03:06 Bridget’s Piece on Sluts 1:12:49 The Two Types of Happiness 1:20:43 Why People Have a Problem With Regrets 1:33:52 Do Men & Women Respond to Regret Differently? 1:40:43 The Feminisation of Culture 1:52:30 Where to Find Bridget
I am 25 single never have been in a serious relationship ever. Work out every day at home, play chess, do archery and play Violin also work night shifts. What am I doing wrong to be single?
Ill be honest this was not the best podcast, because it was essentially listening to the guest stumble through Ideas for 2hrs. It would have been better if the roles reversed and she was asking you questions Chris. I dont even think its her fault, its actually yours. Due to the amount of people you have interviewed and what seems like the personnel study you have taken to these subjects she was unable to be a conduit of knowledge for you too learn from. Instead this very much felt like it was wasting your time, and since you are a stand in for the audience (our view of it obviously not yours) this conversation did not come across as fruitful. which made me think "damn" does this mean your guests have to always be the expensive "authority on X subject" types that can put you back in the student position and therefore the audience as well in that learning position.
This was great, I’d love the two of you to do a deeper dive into some of the stuff you talked about. I think there is huge need for learning about how you choose to live your life when you’re younger impacts you when you become an adult. We all have our reasons and motivations why we made our choices but how do those choices shape our inner voice. You two could totally do a series on: living a party life style and how it shapes your future self. I’m a big fan of both of you and that’s totally just my immediate thoughts after listening to this. Thank you both for sharing a great conversation.
Minor nitpick: can we try to use "empathy" correctly? I understand that bc of current therapy culture, no one actually knows what this means because it gets thrown around more than "gaslighting", but at least on shows like this it would help to use it correctly to not make the problem worse. You don't "give" empathy. Empathy is something you HAVE. Empathy = the ability to see and feel another person's POV. It's having understanding of someone else's lived experience without needing to actually live it. You GIVE sympathy. Sympathy is often what people want when they are feeling bad. Sympathy is having compassion for someone. Empathy is often the pathway to sympathy and compassion, but it is NOT synonymous. It drives me nuts when people say "Oh I have so much empathy for you" or "You have my empathy". NO NO NO. You have so much sympathy, they have your sympathy. Empathy is NOT just a "stronger" version of sympathy. They are two completely different mechanisms. Okay, sorry, rant over. Please just make people learn this.
@@ZukoTheShinigami Does touching grass result in better empathy or sympathy, or both, or none? What's the grass about is what I am asking? p.s. someone who did actually follow your 'advice' (aka passive aggression) wouldn't post your advice in completely inappropriate places
I don't see why it should be controversial to tell people to put their children before their "happiness". If you aren't prepared to do that then you are not ready to be a good parent. Or a good spouse. Marriages fail when people refuse to leave their single life behind. If you are still going out drinking with your single friends then your marriage is doomed.
@TitusCastiglione1503 it starts with setting more realistic expectations. Telling people they don't need to change to get married is horrible advice. We should be teaching people to live like grown-ups and be responsible. I.e. move to the suburbs and buy a house when you get married. Be part of a community. Look after the children you make and set a good example. All this "he doesn't make me happy anymore" whining to therapists is childish.
The problem is that people have very very rarely ever actually done this willingly. Most of the children born for most of the history of the world, were done so, in effect, accidentally. In recent generations we've decoupled sex from breeding at least in theory and then told women to become workers in order to be free and now enforced it as an economic reality and we wonder why birth rates are tanking and our civilisation is screwed lol
If that happiness is you getting shit on over and over again, then I disagree, but if that “happiness” is partying, etc then I agree.. you have to be in a good state of mind to train and be there for your kids
It’s “both and”. When you are a girl raised in a culture that promotes promiscuity, glorifies economic independence (“I don’t need a man”), etc., you are going to absorb those messages and live accordingly, unless you have had some kind of religious upbringing or a traditional female role model in your life. Young women are in part victims, yes, but as you enter adulthood it’s your job to seek out the truth and think critically. I would also argue that men are harmed by feminism because society teaches that men and women are interchangeable, boys don’t get to see examples of healthy masculinity (because we’ve demonized it), etc.
@@clarkesummers1188 I see what you’re saying and I’m not necessarily disagreeing. But from my point of view, you can live in a bad neighborhood and still choose to not be a criminal or harm other people, including yourself. Even then, we don’t make excuses for thieves and murders, regardless of their upbringing they still did the crime. Women should be no different.
Ah yes. The thing that's called figure your own shit out, make mistakes, and then fix them. You should make mistakes and you should fix them. Leaves you some fun, and leaves you a goal to go after. Men lie to themselves and women lie to themselves. What I actually mean is humans lie to themselves. Duh. The word human pretty much is a group of strange ideas .
@@fox1actualI agree with you generally speaking-but I do think there’s a difference between things like murder and theft, versus sexual immorality. In my experience, most secular people make moral judgments primarily (if not exclusively) based on the principle of harm and whether consent is given. You and I would likely agree that these principles are important but not sufficient in making moral decisions. To a lot of people today, men and women, as long as no one is harmed and consent is freely given, they just don’t see a reason *not* to engage in a mutually desired sexual encounter. It’s usually not until after a one-night stand or hookup that a woman feels regret… and I’m not saying that she shouldn’t take accountability, because she absolutely should. But there are a lot of cultural messages that steer young people into making these decisions, and I think we should try to have as much sympathy as possible for the naive college students that only realize how empty “sexual liberation” and hookup culture is after they’ve actually participated in it.
I was taught to be a man of my word. I took my vows very seriously, but my spouse wasn't happy and left. I think we need to change divorce laws, so the person who leaves the marriage aka breaks the contract doesn't get rewarded for breaking the contract.
I never in my life (and I'm 60 so quite a few years) cheated on any relationship I've ever been in. I've ended a few myself, but unlike every woman but one (who chose a job opportunity in another state over me - but I expected it to not last by then anyways) I never had the next "branch" lined up to swing to - I was leaving because it wasn't working, not for the "bigger better deal" (which for all of them also didn't work out).
So someone who's in a genuinely unhappy marriage should be potentially trapped for life? How's that fair. Part of being a man of your word is accepting that there are others in this world that will not reciprocate your values, this is precisely why it is so admirable..
The clear message given to children of divorce is that family bonds are easily broken, that you too can be cut off at any given moment, and to therefore be capable of cutting any of them off with similar nonchalance. That you're effectively alone.
@@RealGrandFailsure, why not? At least the messaging described above is therefore consistent. If I take your question seriously for second, it is often the other parent that does the bond breaking (ie tries to get in the middle and poison the relationship with the other parent). This is especially true of mothers poisoning a child's relationship with the father.
I'm 44 and still don't regret any of the fun I had when I was younger 😂. Married and v settled now in a great career. Loved my wild 20s and wouldn't change a thing; travelled the world and had lovers whilst establishing my career. Was a blast x
Yes, but imo they only really regret it if they are struggling to find a sucker to marry in their 30s.. Hence why comment above doesn't regret anything!
Vaccine passports were introduced in Ireland. I wasn't allowed to eat inside, use gyms or any entertainment venues. I lost all my friends. They told me I should be imprisoned until I learn to do what I am told or just kill myself because society doesn't want me as part of it. I was told this to my face. I had a colleague tell me I wasn't allowed to sit next to her because I was unvaccinated. My boss told me I had made my decision so I needed to just ignore her. There were police checkpoints stopping you leaving your town. You needed to show papers to prove that you were making an approved journey such as going to work in a hospital. If you think that is nothing, I wonder what has to happen for you to think it is serious.
Vaccines work, they are generally _very_ safe, some people are immunocompromised and _can't_ take the vaccine and have to rely on other people doing their part to stop the spread of a disease. I really don't have much empathy for people that won't do the tiny part of getting vaccinated, since that's not having empathy for the people that _can't_ get vaccinated.
@@TNH91A vaccine is not the same as an untrialed gene therapy which the COVID MRNA shot is. Maybe you didn’t know that. Hopefully you and your descendants, if you are still able to have any, won’t have any chronic diseases as a result of taking it. I guess the healthy young people who dropped dead from heart attacks after taking the experimental gene therapy are just a sacrifice that had to be made so that the elderly and infirm could live. Seems like misplaced priorities to me though.
It would have been one thing if the vaccine had actually granted life-long immunity and getting it would have led to herd community. But it didn't. Its benefits could only be found through statistical analysis, and even the supporters acknowledge that the minor statistical benefit lasts only a few months. The profound ignorance and mass hypnosis of the public is STILL difficult to deal with.
24:47 - So, framing that as a female thing is disingenuous. To imply that the woman, who is with a guy who "treats them like shit", has no agency in the relationship is preposterous. Women have their own offensive skills in relationships. They aren't just defensive. Intimate relationships are "the hell of a thousand cuts" where BOTH sides have knives. The whole "poor female" thing was over and done with 15 years ago.
You can add a few zeroes to that 15. Men have always desired women and women have had power over us through that. Most of the time men were supposedly oppressing women most women were in favor of said oppression. The times where women actually demanded change it came swiftly (at historical speeds).
This is a topic that really piqued my curiosity after I got married. My husband comes from parents who both divorced and remarried, and my parents stayed together although they constantly had marital issues. And it's been interesting to see how that has affected us. My husband early on always feared I would leave him as his bio dad did, yet I had this attitude of stubbornly working through our problems because leaving wasn't even a thought/option. But I didn't know how to resolve conflict and would just isolate. Our parental background really played into our relationship dynamic. But I love how it was said that no one knows a relationship better than the 2 people in it. A really important point. 1:46:10 Lolol i had a similar experience with my 9th grade history teacher. The conversation just stuck with me because i remember telling her that I thought a man feeling safe enough to open up emotionally in your relationship was something not to treat lightly, that it was a good thing and she just put her hand on my desk and gave me this almost pitying look. And yet here I am, married to a man that feels safe enough to open up to me emotionally😂
1:30:00 you said something that set off her misandry and I'm glad I caught it. She really entered the "Men act, women are acted upon" mode. This also counts for you, Chris. You have these regrets, but have you considered that it's all in your mind? Would you still feel regret if you discovered the girls you were dating, were dating other men at the same time? She herself said that during her recovery meetings, the women would talk about what was done to them, in general. You talked about what you did to women. She then went off on men complaining about women's attitude .... "are you the man she would want?", "Are you the man who works on himself?" ... Where is the equivalent for women? When was the last time you heard anyone ask a woman "are you the kind of woman a man wants?" Again ... perpetuating the idea that women are the standard and cannot be altered from within. A woman, according to Bridget, can only be changed when a man does something to her. It's tiring to hear the daily message that it's up to men to change the world, it's up to men to change themselves, it's up to men to build ... it's up to men to stop women from abusing political power. Where is the agency of women in this? Is it that hard to acknowledge that women have agency? That women USE men and boyfriends to get what THEY want and not giving what HE wants. I knew this woman, about my age, a little younger. She was let go from a company and she blamed one guy for it. This guy later approached her for possible dating. She told me that, she doesn't like him, but he could be useful to her. Feminism is literally all about eating the cake and having it, too. They want to be acknowledged for having agency, their own goals, their own desires and wants. But as soon as they use their agency for abuse, use, and bad stuff ... suddenly it's "I'm a woman, it happened to me." Even when a female school teacher is caught having sex (statutory rape) with a minor male student, they will tell the police that "He just seduced me, he bought me gifts, etc." Apparently, this is unattractive and the manosphere is whiney to talk about this. But how can you talk about 'respecting women' and ignore their agency or hold them accountable?
My parents are Gen X high school sweethearts been together through thick and thin. Has formed my view the marriage is eternal and a sacred oath to protect and provide for family.
25:20 it can be both. Women lose interest for monogamy sex faster than men. Women get hooked faster at the beginning of the relationship, then put all the responsibility for fulfilling their expectations about relationship on a man and after some time expectations are not met, effort is not there to make woman excited and she misses the thrill of new relationship (as men we do like great adventure as well). So yes, they get hooked fast at first and gas out when they realize that they need to cook for this man for the rest of their lives. Totally understand by the way. ❤
Bridgett makes nearly an entire career or at least has reached notoriety by publicly learning from her past and displaying shame and regrets but also Bridgett "if you wanna go Ho it up to feed your soul, I'm not judging." Bridget is on the correct path but she is walking down it backwards. She should be encouraging women to stop sullying their souls just as she should encourage men to not sully theirs. We lack a culture of shamefulness and regret because people like Bridgett (and honestly a substancial majority of the female population. Males as well but the core demographic is female) do not hold others accountable for their actions. Shame and regrets come first from an outside stimuli. That is how we developed a sense of shame and hone it. There are also internal mechanisms for this but they are largely lost and aimless without exterior peer stimuli.
Agreed. Although I think that if she spoke as if she had completely changed her life and did not have any of her past experiences that affect her current reality it would come off as insincere. Her being able to appear a normal, leftist, western woman who learned from her mistakes will hopefully make less woman do so
I also get peeved by that when a person gives a lengthy explanation why something is bad for you and how it can ruin your life and they always end (or preface) with "But I'm not judging or telling you to stop!" The people that give the horrible advice never add those disclaimers. I know over confidence can be a sign of ignorance but most people seeking advice don't filter it that way, they just want an answer.
I'm gen x and a product of divorce in the mid-80s. I now see that the experience effectively made me 'black-pilled' from the age of 12. I've never considered marriage or kids as desireable. I'm not claiming that's a good thing but it is my own reality.
Same here, at the age of 12 coming home from school, I cought my mom cheating with a badboy/chad type of guy while my dad was at work, I can still hear the noises in my head now at 39. It completely changed my view on marriage and women, even as a kid, I felt betrayed (among many otehr things).
@@Justsomeguysomewhere My mum cheated too - it really f's with your head as a kid. Like you say, it is a betrayal morre than anything. I was with my dad shortly after it kicked-off and he confronted the guy in a local park; never seen that side of him... the world changed pretty rapidly from then on and got ugly at times. I know people who's parents have divorced and they seem to bounce back OK. The reason for the breakup and the way the aftermath is handled, at least in front of the kids, has IMO a lot to do with the outcome and whether the effects have long term impact.
Always thought that the “the kids will be fine” mindset is just a way for people to alleviate themselves of the worry that their kids might not be, and the obligation to actually ascertain whether or not they will be (or are in the case of already divorced people).
I’m not divorced, but those I know who went through it, looked for reasons to stay for a long time. Focusing on what working for a long time, then they ran out of steam doing so.
It was great until she said “men need to stop whining” - men are allowed to talk about injustices they face. Other than that, she talks a lot of sense.
It's a typical thing for women to say. Woman feel like men need to fix their own issues, because otherwise it'll take away attention from women's issues. We've spent the last 50 years helping women, but men start getting acknowledged for their issues and we should just shut up? And they wonder why men are walking away from relationships and society; we're expected to be ignored while helping women who actually get listened to.
Yeah, she needs to watch ‘The Red Pill - Men’s Rights Documentary.’ There is a significant othering and disrespect towards men going on and she’s totally clueless how bad it actually is. Because I’m a man, I’ll only really touch this once. I will press forward with purpose regardless. But this is the gaslighting that happens, men get persecuted and speak up about it, women then tell men it’s ridiculous to bring it up. How does anything resolve? It puts men in a no-win situation. I understand women have felt like they were in this exact scenario in the past. If there’s one thing I do know about women, it’s that they feel a lot of things, true and untrue.
She’s right though. Best thing a man with proper perspective can be told in most situations is “tough shit, man up cowboy.” Just cause a woman says it don’t make it wrong brother!
@@RJVanEtten It really depends on the situation. A man who unjustly lost the ability to see his kids through a custody battle would probably be justified to question if the laws are properly written. A man falsely accused of physical abuse if he tries to defend himself against a physically abusive wife would definitely be able to speak up. Both of these situations are not whining, they are life altering legitimate concerns. Women who fake injuries to take advantage of men, I’d say it’s incorrect to call bringing attention to that whining. I could go on. Other than situations like these I agree, put your head down and work on yourself. There are good women out there. The rest need to be at the curb.
GenX here, coming from 4 generations of divorce (+ remarriage, redivorce, 1/2 siblings all over the place). I only just got married at 44. Veeeeery carefully. And I've cut all contact with my family. They all struggled, yes, but generally sucked. I'm sick of their useless narratives and justifications
Really appreciated the conversation around divorce and just what a dumpster fire it is for children. The devastation goes on for decades, and happens even if the divorce occurs when the children are "all grown up". A great book on the topic of how divorce affects children is "Primal Loss" by Leila Miller (who would make a great guest, Chris), along with her follow-up "Impossible Marriages Redeemed" about couples who walked back from the brink.
Excellent discussions Chris. Just 10 minutes in. My folks split when I was three so I can attest to everything she's talking about. I grew up with a lot of distrust of marriage as my father never completely recovered and fed me plenty of horror stories. Furthermore even as adults, me and my brother have to make sure we see both parents throughout the year and make choices about holidays.
Divorce has huge consequences for children. They form all sorts of underlying Resentments Fears (fear of abandonment being key), Trust issues, taking these to substance and other process addictions (including love/infatuation). "Empowerment" is really maladaptive EGO. Despite my best efforts (which were self will) I repeated my traumas over and over again, hurting and being hurt. In my humble opinion it started in the 60s with the sexual Revolution and the demise of the Church. Selfishness, Self Seeking, Dishonest behaviours of the baby boomer generation. There is no humility and Love, just transactional co dependent dynamics. Egoistical society (both men and women) = Spiritually bankrupt -> Unhealthy ways of resolving conflict: Divorce and harmed children; then the cycle repeats with the next generation. Society needs a reset, and everyone must take responsibility, without pointing the finger outwards alone (i.e. men are to blame, or women are to blame...we are all responsible)
Wow this comments section sucks haha. I thought this was a good episode. She has such a good point about the lasting reverberations of divorce. I enjoy her podcast so it was cool to see her on
I don’t know her well enough, so judging it based on this video. I see that this woman didn’t make a decision to save herself, she was saved by someone and she was smart enough to accept the help. Yes, she’s regretful, but she doesn’t look remorseful to me. Regretful that the choices she made led to bad results, but not remorseful or reflective about the reasons it came to this.
She says Ive been asking you to change for 7 years, why, he was that way when you married him, she will turn 180 average in relationship being a completely different person than when they met
Perhaps, but maybe she got put on to a reasonable and objective way to improve their lives or marriage. Don't be afraid of change; apply reasonable scrutiny then proceed. To be a lil spicy, maybe the husband was dog shit at something he shouldn't be and the wife is in the right for asking for a change.
They are never that way when you marry them or at the beginning of a relationship. The good ones are consistent, but the bad ones play a part until they get what they want and stop putting in effort.
Everyone who said that their experience wasn't represented should write thier experience also. Increase our understanding of the human experience rater than hating on someone for having a different experience.
The problem with this take 41:00 is that people were worried about vaccine passports because multiple politicians and people with power said that they were considering it. And there wasn’t Marshall law but people were arrested and fined for being out of their houses. And many famous people and elected officials said people who didn’t get the vaccine shouldnt have access to medical care or be able to work. Maybe it would or wouldn’t have ever progressed to that but when powerful people are telling you what they want to do, believe them. It’s not irrational to worry about what rich, famous, and powerful people are saying should be done. Besides that I agree with 99% of the pod and you’re the best, I think you’ve surpassed Rogan for me on pods I enjoy listens to and getting a lot out of. Also have always loved Bridgett.
When I was separated from my ex-wife and had sole physical custody of our daughter I made a conscience effort to never bad mouth her mom or talk about the issues I had with her. I left it up to our daughter to discover the problems herself.
Sadhguru had the most interesting comment on casual sex that I ever heard. He said that we carry our experiences as information and some of that is exchanged in a sexual experience. Too much of that causes confusion on a subtle level and inhibits the experience of bliss. You could have him as a guest and question him more about it. At any rate, I tend to be happiest alone.
The only way to be right is to admit when you're wrong and change your views. The more times you admit you are wrong, the less wrong you'll actually be. Truth is like a statue hidden in a block of marble. You have to chisel away at it to find its form. It's not something malleable you can reshape into whatever image you want.
Am I the only one concerned about these people getting a platform? Is no one considering other a possibility that some young folks see this and then just do the same thing? Because, ey, Bridget was able to turn her life around as well…
Don't you want people straightening their lives out? I don't always agree with Bridget. In some areas, I strongly disagree with her, but I see her as someone who's trying to use her mistakes as a cautionary tale for others to learn from, and to be an example to others like her that they can make a change their lives for the better.
@@VTdarkangel You misunderstand. I absolutely want and wish people to fix their lives. I just don’t want them to have a platform and give anyone advice for anything. One can be successful without exposing themselves to the public.
I love the image of a stack of books over her left shoulder... With the shelves to her right half empty with knick knacks on them instead of loaded with books.
THE LEGAL SYSTEM Is Bridget seriously fighting for the divorce laws, child custody laws, domestic violence laws and false accusation laws to be made fairer to men?
It really sucks when one’s parents divorce, but worst off is living in a household where the two parents hate each other, even if it’s not abusive. The resentment between them will grow, especially from men when their wife doesn’t wish to sleep with them, or from the wife when the man starts seeing another woman. Kids aren’t stupid. It’s better to separate amicably. And I have always been against women being promiscuous because it only benefits men. The ratio of orgasms from male and female is not even close to being equal. Also, men should pay for the privilege of having a woman even give him the time of day, even more so sleep with them.
Every time Chris brings up the Quiet Bigotry of Male Expectations I think This guy gets it. Both the trad people and feminism miss this, and it is real modern wisdom.
I didn’t see your original piece. Will have to go find it. I have the exact same regrets but had not been in touch with them before listening to this. I cry for my younger self.
As long as you're kind to yourself also. We came into a system that incentivised certain attitudes and behaviours; adolescents provided with cookie-cutter personas that promise freedom and confidence.
Sorry, she knew what she was doing and enjoyed it. She would do it all over. This is about garnering sympathy for forgiveness. Her relationship will not last long unfortunately
Sorry, but a lot of this is just the typical cope of 35+ women, who spent all their capital and are now broke. You don't regret anything. Not really. If you could be 19 and hot again, you would do the same stuff again. You are like broke gamblers: "I would never gamble again!" YES, YOU WOULD. If i gave you a million Dollars, you would be back at the table tonight. And if women could be 19 and hot again, they would throw themselves at the bad boys all over again.
You seem hurt but this is true, most humans have almost zero integrity and will do what they want to get their needs met if there are no consequences. This won’t stop until what happened to Iran will happen to the west after the collapse.
Exactly people act like 19 year olds know the consequences of their actions. Guess what? Many of them don’t even think about it. Brain doesn’t develop til 26. Yet a 19 y/o is supposed to be making grown up decisions 🤔
@@AncientYouth64 My point was the exact opposite. This isn't about a moral compass. This is about women's fundamental inability to correctly assess the viability of a given man as a long term partner. They throw themselves at the guy who looks the best and delude themselves into thinking that they are the one who will be able to keep him. Just like Gamblers think this table is the one.
@@pricklycatsNot surprised with the weak and uncommitted people we have today. What happened to fighting for a relationship and vows, these days it's easier to move on and some partners are toxic (show their true colors after marriage) 😂. Divorce is not the problem, the fake and weak people are the problem.
How did any women, much less this many of them, ever (in the first place) BUY the notion of "sleep your way to empowerment"? ... Would these same women buy "Jump off a bridge to find happiness"? Because the two ideas are equally obvious in their absurdity. (No offense intended to ladies who bought into either idea. No insult intended to those who believe jumping off a bridge will bring happiness. Sorry. It's just TRUE that it's as obviously bad an idea as "sleep your way to empowerment".)
I disagree with you. To keep it short. Great sex can be a confidence builder/empowering and it's physically pleasurable. In order to have great sex you have to try/pursue having sex. It can feel constraining to not have sex on the basis of society telling you it's "bad". The issue isn't about being slutty, the issue is that a meaningful percentage of the sex people are having isn't physically pleasurable enough (the orgasm gap). Also, safety,people using each other and not being forthcoming or ignorant about what they want from their sexual encounters.
@@m.czandogg9576 Interesting. You assert that "sex can be a confidence builder". In your worldview, is someone's confidence being built on sex a good and healthy form or foundation of confidence? If so, would you recommend/advise young ones to build their confidence on sex?
@@MylezNevison As long as sex is only a part of your foundational confidence, then it's fine. Also, it can be a good sign because being great at sex can bleed over onto other non sexual aspects of life. For example, conscientiousness, proper reciprocity and effective non verbal and verbal communication. Assuming young people are doing it properly then yes, I believe sex can be a good confidence builder. But like I said above, it shouldn't be the MAIN foundation, only a part.
3:50 Already I disagree with her. If the relationship isn't working and things are already at the stage of divorce, just get it over with. Don't try to make it work for the kids sake. Yer just giving the kids bad messages and setting bad examples. It depends on why the relationship is failing though.
If you raise your child in a loveless/unhappy marriage, what are you teaching your children? If both parents truly love their children, you can co-parent well. My ex and I done so many things together after we separated, including family vacations. One without our significant others and one with them. We both genuinely want to see each other happy because that's what made our boys happy. Not saying she doesn't know what she's saying but she has definitely been in an echo chamber. You have to love your kids more than you hate your ex.
I noticed that too, but she did mention in her reply that the generation with the highest divorce rate is the Boomer generation. So with Gen X having the Boomers as their parents, Gen X have suffered the highest divorce rate from their parents. It seems he just wasn't aware that the kids of Gen X, are not the ones who have gone through the highest parental divorce rates.
there being a male president now never caused you to rebut the arguments Chris has made about the declining state of the average man. Take your fallacies somewhere else.
25:20 Yes it can. I do NOT think men should sleep around before marriage. However, the difference between promiscuous women and non-promiscuous women is in this very thing in fact. That’s exactly what they’re saying. I’m just a Christian, not part of some ‘manosphere.’ Promiscuous women are more likely to divorce their husbands, flat fact.
If you weren’t married in the 50’s by your early 20’s there was something wrong with you Catholic, Anglican , Presbyterian churches had influence & power Women learned through through 1&2 world wars that given opportunity they were quite capable of men things Education, feminism, me too movements give empowerment Population, environmental , housing, financial issues effect choices for having/ wanting children
00:00: The Complexities of Divorce and Its Long-Term Effects 11:45: The Emotional Toll of Divorce and Shared Experiences 24:03: The Complexity of Attachment in Relationships 25:26: The Intersection of Intelligence and Societal Trends 27:23: The Complexity of Divorce and Personal Reflection 37:34: The Fluctuating Nature of Public Opinion and Accountability 47:25: The Evolving Landscape of Political Discourse 54:27: Ageism and Its Subtle Acceptance in Society 55:11: The Complexity of Racism and Identity 56:01: The Dynamics of Anti-Woke Sentiment and Political Power 01:03:18: Reflections on Empowerment and Personal Experiences 01:11:47: Exploring Casual Sex and Its Implications 01:12:54: The Balance Between Present Enjoyment and Future Regret 01:14:52: The Impact of Regret and Self-Disclosure on Personal Growth 01:26:22: The Role of Regret in Recovery and Personal Responsibility 01:36:51: Gender Dynamics in Regret and Recovery 01:48:23: Evolving Roles in Parenting and Community Dynamics 01:51:59: Navigating Modern Parenting Challenges Summary by Awesum AI
Maybe think about divorce from another perspective. We are animals, and there tend to be evolutionary reasons for our behavior. I can think of three: 1. getting out of bad situation (I think this is in the minority, as most divorces happen between regular people who someone else will find a perfectly ok partner), 2. Monetary benefit - I doubt this is it, we've had so little time with this benefit 3. Genetic variance for our offsprings - I think this is the most likely. When there is more variation, they most likely won't all have same genetic issues and are more likely to survive. This also explains infidelity. This is great news! We don't have to beat ourselves in the back with questions like "what did we do wrong?", unless you were drunk all the time or abusive.
Two ways of looking at Peter Zeihan - he's either a prophet or just severely over confident and the fact that most of what he talks about is so far in the future, where you couldn't possibly know how things will really turn out, I really feel like it's the latter. Most con artists are good at coming across as being something they're not, Elon Musk is a good example. The man is a disgracful idiot, but the general consensus is that he's a humanitarian genius... So I sit on the fence with Zeihan and it's very much a game of wait and see, which is just life anyway.
We can't even reliably predict the weather more than about a week into the future, the system is too dynamic and chaotic, but someone can fortell human development, decades into the future, because he's well read? The people who make weather predictions are well read, you cannot read about what no one knows 🤷
i didn't finish this. she doesn't have any credentials. i think she's mostly right, but i think i'm right about a bunch of stuff. don't see me getting this platform. just a weird episode.
I'm listening to this after coming back from a 50th wedding anniversary. Most of us there have been in the same relationship for 35+ years. I guess we were different back then, but I am Gen X.
Zeihan called the Ukraine war to like three months in like 2016. I think he's just super careful to only speak on factually based subjects. Demographics and geography are pretty damned objective.
“I thought everyone would remember COVID and go Republican when RVW was being overturned by crazy Republicans and the most far right court in recent history.” 😂 Now thats funny!
What are your thoughts on this episode? Get my free Reading List of 100 life-changing books here - chriswillx.com/books/ Here's the timestamps:
00:00 Bridget’s Controversial Writing
04:46 Will Gen X Experience Divorce More?
07:34 Unforeseen Consequences of Divorce
18:12 The Pushback From Bridget’s Article
26:37 People Needing to Defend Their Position
35:05 Relying on People Who Sound Certain
44:15 What Do Normies Actually Know & Think About?
47:04 How Has the Culture War Changed?
1:03:06 Bridget’s Piece on Sluts
1:12:49 The Two Types of Happiness
1:20:43 Why People Have a Problem With Regrets
1:33:52 Do Men & Women Respond to Regret Differently?
1:40:43 The Feminisation of Culture
1:52:30 Where to Find Bridget
I am 25 single never have been in a serious relationship ever. Work out every day at home, play chess, do archery and play Violin also work night shifts. What am I doing wrong to be single?
Ill be honest this was not the best podcast, because it was essentially listening to the guest stumble through Ideas for 2hrs.
It would have been better if the roles reversed and she was asking you questions Chris.
I dont even think its her fault, its actually yours. Due to the amount of people you have interviewed and what seems like the personnel
study you have taken to these subjects she was unable to be a conduit of knowledge for you too learn from. Instead this very much
felt like it was wasting your time, and since you are a stand in for the audience (our view of it obviously not yours) this conversation
did not come across as fruitful.
which made me think "damn" does this mean your guests have to always be the expensive "authority on X subject" types that can put
you back in the student position and therefore the audience as well in that learning position.
This was great, I’d love the two of you to do a deeper dive into some of the stuff you talked about. I think there is huge need for learning about how you choose to live your life when you’re younger impacts you when you become an adult. We all have our reasons and motivations why we made our choices but how do those choices shape our inner voice. You two could totally do a series on: living a party life style and how it shapes your future self. I’m a big fan of both of you and that’s totally just my immediate thoughts after listening to this. Thank you both for sharing a great conversation.
Minor nitpick: can we try to use "empathy" correctly? I understand that bc of current therapy culture, no one actually knows what this means because it gets thrown around more than "gaslighting", but at least on shows like this it would help to use it correctly to not make the problem worse.
You don't "give" empathy. Empathy is something you HAVE. Empathy = the ability to see and feel another person's POV. It's having understanding of someone else's lived experience without needing to actually live it.
You GIVE sympathy. Sympathy is often what people want when they are feeling bad. Sympathy is having compassion for someone.
Empathy is often the pathway to sympathy and compassion, but it is NOT synonymous. It drives me nuts when people say "Oh I have so much empathy for you" or "You have my empathy". NO NO NO. You have so much sympathy, they have your sympathy.
Empathy is NOT just a "stronger" version of sympathy. They are two completely different mechanisms.
Okay, sorry, rant over.
Please just make people learn this.
Empathy has killed us a functional society.
You are my soulmate of the day😂 Feel exactly the same. But look at the number of likes and the other comments. We are alone in this world 🤷♂️
@@happydogg312 "Supposubly"
@@ZukoTheShinigami Does touching grass result in better empathy or sympathy, or both, or none? What's the grass about is what I am asking?
p.s. someone who did actually follow your 'advice' (aka passive aggression) wouldn't post your advice in completely inappropriate places
I don't see why it should be controversial to tell people to put their children before their "happiness". If you aren't prepared to do that then you are not ready to be a good parent. Or a good spouse.
Marriages fail when people refuse to leave their single life behind. If you are still going out drinking with your single friends then your marriage is doomed.
Sounds like they need to strive to be better people.
@TitusCastiglione1503 it starts with setting more realistic expectations.
Telling people they don't need to change to get married is horrible advice. We should be teaching people to live like grown-ups and be responsible.
I.e. move to the suburbs and buy a house when you get married. Be part of a community. Look after the children you make and set a good example.
All this "he doesn't make me happy anymore" whining to therapists is childish.
@@Zebra66 getting a house is kinda hard right now but yeah I broadly agree with the rest
The problem is that people have very very rarely ever actually done this willingly. Most of the children born for most of the history of the world, were done so, in effect, accidentally.
In recent generations we've decoupled sex from breeding at least in theory and then told women to become workers in order to be free and now enforced it as an economic reality and we wonder why birth rates are tanking and our civilisation is screwed lol
If that happiness is you getting shit on over and over again, then I disagree, but if that “happiness” is partying, etc then I agree..
you have to be in a good state of mind to train and be there for your kids
“They lied to women”? Women lie to themselves. Time to take accountability.
It’s “both and”. When you are a girl raised in a culture that promotes promiscuity, glorifies economic independence (“I don’t need a man”), etc., you are going to absorb those messages and live accordingly, unless you have had some kind of religious upbringing or a traditional female role model in your life. Young women are in part victims, yes, but as you enter adulthood it’s your job to seek out the truth and think critically. I would also argue that men are harmed by feminism because society teaches that men and women are interchangeable, boys don’t get to see examples of healthy masculinity (because we’ve demonized it), etc.
@@clarkesummers1188 I see what you’re saying and I’m not necessarily disagreeing. But from my point of view, you can live in a bad neighborhood and still choose to not be a criminal or harm other people, including yourself. Even then, we don’t make excuses for thieves and murders, regardless of their upbringing they still did the crime. Women should be no different.
She actually says it in the first 10 min "don't lie to yourself" so pretty sure she agrees with your first statement.
Ah yes. The thing that's called figure your own shit out, make mistakes, and then fix them. You should make mistakes and you should fix them. Leaves you some fun, and leaves you a goal to go after.
Men lie to themselves and women lie to themselves. What I actually mean is humans lie to themselves. Duh. The word human pretty much is a group of strange ideas .
@@fox1actualI agree with you generally speaking-but I do think there’s a difference between things like murder and theft, versus sexual immorality. In my experience, most secular people make moral judgments primarily (if not exclusively) based on the principle of harm and whether consent is given. You and I would likely agree that these principles are important but not sufficient in making moral decisions. To a lot of people today, men and women, as long as no one is harmed and consent is freely given, they just don’t see a reason *not* to engage in a mutually desired sexual encounter. It’s usually not until after a one-night stand or hookup that a woman feels regret… and I’m not saying that she shouldn’t take accountability, because she absolutely should. But there are a lot of cultural messages that steer young people into making these decisions, and I think we should try to have as much sympathy as possible for the naive college students that only realize how empty “sexual liberation” and hookup culture is after they’ve actually participated in it.
I was taught to be a man of my word. I took my vows very seriously, but my spouse wasn't happy and left. I think we need to change divorce laws, so the person who leaves the marriage aka breaks the contract doesn't get rewarded for breaking the contract.
they're rewarded for their "temporary emotion"
I never in my life (and I'm 60 so quite a few years) cheated on any relationship I've ever been in. I've ended a few myself, but unlike every woman but one (who chose a job opportunity in another state over me - but I expected it to not last by then anyways) I never had the next "branch" lined up to swing to - I was leaving because it wasn't working, not for the "bigger better deal" (which for all of them also didn't work out).
So someone who's in a genuinely unhappy marriage should be potentially trapped for life? How's that fair. Part of being a man of your word is accepting that there are others in this world that will not reciprocate your values, this is precisely why it is so admirable..
Amen.
The clear message given to children of divorce is that family bonds are easily broken, that you too can be cut off at any given moment, and to therefore be capable of cutting any of them off with similar nonchalance. That you're effectively alone.
It's a great message for societal stability.
@@adamstanway7720 can you break bonds with kids that are socially corrupted too?
@@RealGrandFailsure, why not? At least the messaging described above is therefore consistent. If I take your question seriously for second, it is often the other parent that does the bond breaking (ie tries to get in the middle and poison the relationship with the other parent). This is especially true of mothers poisoning a child's relationship with the father.
Thats definitely an attitude my husband had when we first married, yes. We got through it tho
Man that hit me hard. My parents split when i was 1, and thats basically how i’ve always felt but i never understood why
Every girl I know that slept around regrets it. They either admit it sooner or later as they get older and look back.
I'm 44 and still don't regret any of the fun I had when I was younger 😂. Married and v settled now in a great career. Loved my wild 20s and wouldn't change a thing; travelled the world and had lovers whilst establishing my career. Was a blast x
Yes, but imo they only really regret it if they are struggling to find a sucker to marry in their 30s..
Hence why comment above doesn't regret anything!
@@rebecca7410lol husband doesn’t know. Show him your comment here. Let’s test your “marriage” real quick.
@@rebecca7410 Were all the "wild" situations transparent for both parties?
@@ForObviousReason thanks for sharing 😘
Vaccine passports were introduced in Ireland. I wasn't allowed to eat inside, use gyms or any entertainment venues. I lost all my friends. They told me I should be imprisoned until I learn to do what I am told or just kill myself because society doesn't want me as part of it. I was told this to my face. I had a colleague tell me I wasn't allowed to sit next to her because I was unvaccinated. My boss told me I had made my decision so I needed to just ignore her. There were police checkpoints stopping you leaving your town. You needed to show papers to prove that you were making an approved journey such as going to work in a hospital. If you think that is nothing, I wonder what has to happen for you to think it is serious.
Vaccines work, they are generally _very_ safe, some people are immunocompromised and _can't_ take the vaccine and have to rely on other people doing their part to stop the spread of a disease. I really don't have much empathy for people that won't do the tiny part of getting vaccinated, since that's not having empathy for the people that _can't_ get vaccinated.
@@TNH91A vaccine is not the same as an untrialed gene therapy which the COVID MRNA shot is. Maybe you didn’t know that. Hopefully you and your descendants, if you are still able to have any, won’t have any chronic diseases as a result of taking it. I guess the healthy young people who dropped dead from heart attacks after taking the experimental gene therapy are just a sacrifice that had to be made so that the elderly and infirm could live. Seems like misplaced priorities to me though.
"useful idiots" as Yuri Bezmenov defected former KGB agent called them.... truly harrowing...
It would have been one thing if the vaccine had actually granted life-long immunity and getting it would have led to herd community.
But it didn't. Its benefits could only be found through statistical analysis, and even the supporters acknowledge that the minor statistical benefit lasts only a few months. The profound ignorance and mass hypnosis of the public is STILL difficult to deal with.
Similar situation in the uk. It was awful yet it's completely forgotten
24:47 - So, framing that as a female thing is disingenuous. To imply that the woman, who is with a guy who "treats them like shit", has no agency in the relationship is preposterous. Women have their own offensive skills in relationships. They aren't just defensive. Intimate relationships are "the hell of a thousand cuts" where BOTH sides have knives. The whole "poor female" thing was over and done with 15 years ago.
You can add a few zeroes to that 15. Men have always desired women and women have had power over us through that. Most of the time men were supposedly oppressing women most women were in favor of said oppression. The times where women actually demanded change it came swiftly (at historical speeds).
But weaponising victimhood is so powerful.
She didn’t blame the men. She just regretted her own actions.
I know. Chris did, hence the timestamp.
The poor female thing shouldn’t have started in the first place
This is a topic that really piqued my curiosity after I got married. My husband comes from parents who both divorced and remarried, and my parents stayed together although they constantly had marital issues. And it's been interesting to see how that has affected us. My husband early on always feared I would leave him as his bio dad did, yet I had this attitude of stubbornly working through our problems because leaving wasn't even a thought/option. But I didn't know how to resolve conflict and would just isolate.
Our parental background really played into our relationship dynamic.
But I love how it was said that no one knows a relationship better than the 2 people in it. A really important point.
1:46:10
Lolol i had a similar experience with my 9th grade history teacher. The conversation just stuck with me because i remember telling her that I thought a man feeling safe enough to open up emotionally in your relationship was something not to treat lightly, that it was a good thing and she just put her hand on my desk and gave me this almost pitying look.
And yet here I am, married to a man that feels safe enough to open up to me emotionally😂
when i first saw the title i was like damn i need to sleep more hours per night
Same
jarvan IV
Me too!
...then i saw "has failed women."
I thought that women weren't sleeping enough
@@broncoBACON and then it turned out they are sleeping to much....
1:30:00 you said something that set off her misandry and I'm glad I caught it.
She really entered the "Men act, women are acted upon" mode. This also counts for you, Chris. You have these regrets, but have you considered that it's all in your mind? Would you still feel regret if you discovered the girls you were dating, were dating other men at the same time?
She herself said that during her recovery meetings, the women would talk about what was done to them, in general. You talked about what you did to women.
She then went off on men complaining about women's attitude .... "are you the man she would want?", "Are you the man who works on himself?" ... Where is the equivalent for women? When was the last time you heard anyone ask a woman "are you the kind of woman a man wants?"
Again ... perpetuating the idea that women are the standard and cannot be altered from within. A woman, according to Bridget, can only be changed when a man does something to her.
It's tiring to hear the daily message that it's up to men to change the world, it's up to men to change themselves, it's up to men to build ... it's up to men to stop women from abusing political power.
Where is the agency of women in this? Is it that hard to acknowledge that women have agency? That women USE men and boyfriends to get what THEY want and not giving what HE wants.
I knew this woman, about my age, a little younger. She was let go from a company and she blamed one guy for it. This guy later approached her for possible dating. She told me that, she doesn't like him, but he could be useful to her.
Feminism is literally all about eating the cake and having it, too. They want to be acknowledged for having agency, their own goals, their own desires and wants. But as soon as they use their agency for abuse, use, and bad stuff ... suddenly it's "I'm a woman, it happened to me."
Even when a female school teacher is caught having sex (statutory rape) with a minor male student, they will tell the police that "He just seduced me, he bought me gifts, etc."
Apparently, this is unattractive and the manosphere is whiney to talk about this. But how can you talk about 'respecting women' and ignore their agency or hold them accountable?
My parents are Gen X high school sweethearts been together through thick and thin. Has formed my view the marriage is eternal and a sacred oath to protect and provide for family.
Marriage is supposed to be for eternity. Until death do us part, in sickness and in health.
25:20 it can be both. Women lose interest for monogamy sex faster than men. Women get hooked faster at the beginning of the relationship, then put all the responsibility for fulfilling their expectations about relationship on a man and after some time expectations are not met, effort is not there to make woman excited and she misses the thrill of new relationship (as men we do like great adventure as well).
So yes, they get hooked fast at first and gas out when they realize that they need to cook for this man for the rest of their lives. Totally understand by the way. ❤
Bridgett makes nearly an entire career or at least has reached notoriety by publicly learning from her past and displaying shame and regrets but also Bridgett "if you wanna go Ho it up to feed your soul, I'm not judging."
Bridget is on the correct path but she is walking down it backwards. She should be encouraging women to stop sullying their souls just as she should encourage men to not sully theirs.
We lack a culture of shamefulness and regret because people like Bridgett (and honestly a substancial majority of the female population. Males as well but the core demographic is female) do not hold others accountable for their actions. Shame and regrets come first from an outside stimuli. That is how we developed a sense of shame and hone it. There are also internal mechanisms for this but they are largely lost and aimless without exterior peer stimuli.
Agreed. Although I think that if she spoke as if she had completely changed her life and did not have any of her past experiences that affect her current reality it would come off as insincere.
Her being able to appear a normal, leftist, western woman who learned from her mistakes will hopefully make less woman do so
I also get peeved by that when a person gives a lengthy explanation why something is bad for you and how it can ruin your life and they always end (or preface) with "But I'm not judging or telling you to stop!"
The people that give the horrible advice never add those disclaimers. I know over confidence can be a sign of ignorance but most people seeking advice don't filter it that way, they just want an answer.
On the right path, but walking it backward. Exactly.
Being so certain is more often a sign of ignorance than knowledge.
"The problem with the world is that the intelligent people are full of doubts, while the stupid ones are full of confidence"
I'm gen x and a product of divorce in the mid-80s. I now see that the experience effectively made me 'black-pilled' from the age of 12.
I've never considered marriage or kids as desireable. I'm not claiming that's a good thing but it is my own reality.
Sorry kun to hear that🤔Have a good day👍🇫🇮
Same here, at the age of 12 coming home from school, I cought my mom cheating with a badboy/chad type of guy while my dad was at work, I can still hear the noises in my head now at 39.
It completely changed my view on marriage and women, even as a kid, I felt betrayed (among many otehr things).
@@Justsomeguysomewhere My mum cheated too - it really f's with your head as a kid. Like you say, it is a betrayal morre than anything. I was with my dad shortly after it kicked-off and he confronted the guy in a local park; never seen that side of him... the world changed pretty rapidly from then on and got ugly at times.
I know people who's parents have divorced and they seem to bounce back OK. The reason for the breakup and the way the aftermath is handled, at least in front of the kids, has IMO a lot to do with the outcome and whether the effects have long term impact.
Your worst sin is that you have destroyed and betrayed yourself for nothing.- Fyodor Dostoevsky
Always thought that the “the kids will be fine” mindset is just a way for people to alleviate themselves of the worry that their kids might not be, and the obligation to actually ascertain whether or not they will be (or are in the case of already divorced people).
Kids are NOT a commodity. Think carefully before trying to have them.
Its easy finding reasons to leave. In a marriage, find the reasons to stay
I’m not divorced, but those I know who went through it, looked for reasons to stay for a long time. Focusing on what working for a long time, then they ran out of steam doing so.
Thank you Bridgette. As a child of divorce, thank you so much. This discussion needs to be talked about more.
It was great until she said “men need to stop whining” - men are allowed to talk about injustices they face. Other than that, she talks a lot of sense.
It's a typical thing for women to say. Woman feel like men need to fix their own issues, because otherwise it'll take away attention from women's issues.
We've spent the last 50 years helping women, but men start getting acknowledged for their issues and we should just shut up?
And they wonder why men are walking away from relationships and society; we're expected to be ignored while helping women who actually get listened to.
Yeah, she needs to watch ‘The Red Pill - Men’s Rights Documentary.’
There is a significant othering and disrespect towards men going on and she’s totally clueless how bad it actually is. Because I’m a man, I’ll only really touch this once. I will press forward with purpose regardless. But this is the gaslighting that happens, men get persecuted and speak up about it, women then tell men it’s ridiculous to bring it up. How does anything resolve? It puts men in a no-win situation.
I understand women have felt like they were in this exact scenario in the past. If there’s one thing I do know about women, it’s that they feel a lot of things, true and untrue.
She’s right though. Best thing a man with proper perspective can be told in most situations is “tough shit, man up cowboy.” Just cause a woman says it don’t make it wrong brother!
@@RJVanEtten It really depends on the situation. A man who unjustly lost the ability to see his kids through a custody battle would probably be justified to question if the laws are properly written.
A man falsely accused of physical abuse if he tries to defend himself against a physically abusive wife would definitely be able to speak up. Both of these situations are not whining, they are life altering legitimate concerns.
Women who fake injuries to take advantage of men, I’d say it’s incorrect to call bringing attention to that whining.
I could go on.
Other than situations like these I agree, put your head down and work on yourself. There are good women out there. The rest need to be at the curb.
@@Michael-vc2csI watched it. It was a deceitful representation of the manosphere. A propaganda piece
GenX here, coming from 4 generations of divorce (+ remarriage, redivorce, 1/2 siblings all over the place). I only just got married at 44. Veeeeery carefully. And I've cut all contact with my family. They all struggled, yes, but generally sucked. I'm sick of their useless narratives and justifications
Really appreciated the conversation around divorce and just what a dumpster fire it is for children. The devastation goes on for decades, and happens even if the divorce occurs when the children are "all grown up". A great book on the topic of how divorce affects children is "Primal Loss" by Leila Miller (who would make a great guest, Chris), along with her follow-up "Impossible Marriages Redeemed" about couples who walked back from the brink.
Excellent discussions Chris. Just 10 minutes in. My folks split when I was three so I can attest to everything she's talking about. I grew up with a lot of distrust of marriage as my father never completely recovered and fed me plenty of horror stories. Furthermore even as adults, me and my brother have to make sure we see both parents throughout the year and make choices about holidays.
Divorce has huge consequences for children. They form all sorts of underlying Resentments Fears (fear of abandonment being key), Trust issues, taking these to substance and other process addictions (including love/infatuation). "Empowerment" is really maladaptive EGO. Despite my best efforts (which were self will) I repeated my traumas over and over again, hurting and being hurt.
In my humble opinion it started in the 60s with the sexual Revolution and the demise of the Church. Selfishness, Self Seeking, Dishonest behaviours of the baby boomer generation. There is no humility and Love, just transactional co dependent dynamics. Egoistical society (both men and women) = Spiritually bankrupt -> Unhealthy ways of resolving conflict: Divorce and harmed children; then the cycle repeats with the next generation. Society needs a reset, and everyone must take responsibility, without pointing the finger outwards alone (i.e. men are to blame, or women are to blame...we are all responsible)
Agree with everything you said! The naked self-centeredness has got to go
She never answers Chris' questions. She imagines a different question and then answers it instead. "Like... Like... Like..."
Reminds me of a few of my colleagues
Shallow... like, like, like.
Wow this comments section sucks haha. I thought this was a good episode. She has such a good point about the lasting reverberations of divorce. I enjoy her podcast so it was cool to see her on
She sounds like she had a few wine glasses before the interview though.
The "reading comprehension" observation can also be due to lack of attention - including not reading it at all.
Or emotions
I don’t know her well enough, so judging it based on this video. I see that this woman didn’t make a decision to save herself, she was saved by someone and she was smart enough to accept the help. Yes, she’s regretful, but she doesn’t look remorseful to me. Regretful that the choices she made led to bad results, but not remorseful or reflective about the reasons it came to this.
I agree. Shallow. Flighty.
She says Ive been asking you to change for 7 years, why, he was that way when you married him, she will turn 180 average in relationship being a completely different person than when they met
Perhaps, but maybe she got put on to a reasonable and objective way to improve their lives or marriage.
Don't be afraid of change; apply reasonable scrutiny then proceed.
To be a lil spicy, maybe the husband was dog shit at something he shouldn't be and the wife is in the right for asking for a change.
They are never that way when you marry them or at the beginning of a relationship. The good ones are consistent, but the bad ones play a part until they get what they want and stop putting in effort.
Wave your “freedom torches” ladies! Will they ever learn?
The left needs to know that America will be very healthy under another Trump Presidency.
correct
I really enjoyed this episode. Just felt like a conversation among friends…. two really decent and really human people.
So grateful this interview is out there!
My innocent mind at first thought "sleep your way to empowerment" meant "sleep (like in zzZzzzZz..) is the way to empowerment"
Everyone who said that their experience wasn't represented should write thier experience also.
Increase our understanding of the human experience rater than hating on someone for having a different experience.
The problem with this take 41:00 is that people were worried about vaccine passports because multiple politicians and people with power said that they were considering it. And there wasn’t Marshall law but people were arrested and fined for being out of their houses. And many famous people and elected officials said people who didn’t get the vaccine shouldnt have access to medical care or be able to work. Maybe it would or wouldn’t have ever progressed to that but when powerful people are telling you what they want to do, believe them. It’s not irrational to worry about what rich, famous, and powerful people are saying should be done. Besides that I agree with 99% of the pod and you’re the best, I think you’ve surpassed Rogan for me on pods I enjoy listens to and getting a lot out of. Also have always loved Bridgett.
When I was separated from my ex-wife and had sole physical custody of our daughter I made a conscience effort to never bad mouth her mom or talk about the issues I had with her. I left it up to our daughter to discover the problems herself.
Also watch Dumpster Fire.
women lied to themselves
Yes!! Love seeing Bridget on such a huge platform
Try telling that to the Cackler. She's one spot from the top.
Sadhguru had the most interesting comment on casual sex that I ever heard. He said that we carry our experiences as information and some of that is exchanged in a sexual experience. Too much of that causes confusion on a subtle level and inhibits the experience of bliss. You could have him as a guest and question him more about it. At any rate, I tend to be happiest alone.
The only way to be right is to admit when you're wrong and change your views. The more times you admit you are wrong, the less wrong you'll actually be. Truth is like a statue hidden in a block of marble. You have to chisel away at it to find its form. It's not something malleable you can reshape into whatever image you want.
Am I the only one concerned about these people getting a platform? Is no one considering other a possibility that some young folks see this and then just do the same thing? Because, ey, Bridget was able to turn her life around as well…
Don't you want people straightening their lives out? I don't always agree with Bridget. In some areas, I strongly disagree with her, but I see her as someone who's trying to use her mistakes as a cautionary tale for others to learn from, and to be an example to others like her that they can make a change their lives for the better.
@@VTdarkangel You misunderstand. I absolutely want and wish people to fix their lives. I just don’t want them to have a platform and give anyone advice for anything. One can be successful without exposing themselves to the public.
Mine is I (don't) regret being a 30 old male who's never dated. The highs and lows of such a life.
I love the image of a stack of books over her left shoulder... With the shelves to her right half empty with knick knacks on them instead of loaded with books.
i thought this was about sleep, not rumpy pumpy!
"The only people that don't look back with regret are idiots and psychopaths." -Robin Williams
Worked for Kamala?
so far... its gotta end somewhere
Lol
What’s your point?
I'm a liberal, and that's exactly what I thought when I read the title lolol
Kamala has worked it. You go girls! Swallow for the gold.
THE LEGAL SYSTEM
Is Bridget seriously fighting for the divorce laws, child custody laws, domestic violence laws and false accusation laws to be made fairer to men?
It worked for Kamala Harris.
“Sleep Your Way To Empowerment” just reminds me of kamala somehow lol
It really sucks when one’s parents divorce, but worst off is living in a household where the two parents hate each other, even if it’s not abusive.
The resentment between them will grow, especially from men when their wife doesn’t wish to sleep with them, or from the wife when the man starts seeing another woman.
Kids aren’t stupid. It’s better to separate amicably.
And I have always been against women being promiscuous because it only benefits men. The ratio of orgasms from male and female is not even close to being equal. Also, men should pay for the privilege of having a woman even give him the time of day, even more so sleep with them.
Every time Chris brings up the Quiet Bigotry of Male Expectations I think This guy gets it. Both the trad people and feminism miss this, and it is real modern wisdom.
Willie Brown doesnt have a problem with it
I didn’t see your original piece. Will have to go find it. I have the exact same regrets but had not been in touch with them before listening to this. I cry for my younger self.
As long as you're kind to yourself also. We came into a system that incentivised certain attitudes and behaviours; adolescents provided with cookie-cutter personas that promise freedom and confidence.
Women don’t want to hear any of this. It’ll be the most male watched video on this channel.
It is annoying how many people call themselves stand up comedians these days
Sorry, she knew what she was doing and enjoyed it. She would do it all over. This is about garnering sympathy for forgiveness. Her relationship will not last long unfortunately
Chris you're a hero mate
Agreed, prepare for your comment to blow up lol
@@Viikk785 ahaha i love to comment a few minutes after an upload. Still I won't get my hopes up ahaha
Did not know who she was but at 37:00 I got it. Moving on.
Sorry, but a lot of this is just the typical cope of 35+ women, who spent all their capital and are now broke. You don't regret anything. Not really. If you could be 19 and hot again, you would do the same stuff again. You are like broke gamblers: "I would never gamble again!" YES, YOU WOULD. If i gave you a million Dollars, you would be back at the table tonight. And if women could be 19 and hot again, they would throw themselves at the bad boys all over again.
You seem hurt but this is true, most humans have almost zero integrity and will do what they want to get their needs met if there are no consequences. This won’t stop until what happened to Iran will happen to the west after the collapse.
Well said.
Exactly people act like 19 year olds know the consequences of their actions. Guess what? Many of them don’t even think about it. Brain doesn’t develop til 26. Yet a 19 y/o is supposed to be making grown up decisions 🤔
@@AncientYouth64 My point was the exact opposite. This isn't about a moral compass. This is about women's fundamental inability to correctly assess the viability of a given man as a long term partner. They throw themselves at the guy who looks the best and delude themselves into thinking that they are the one who will be able to keep him. Just like Gamblers think this table is the one.
@@johannesdolch TheyOnlyRegretGrowingOldAndLosingValue.
Ah, it's Bridget explaining she regrets sleeping with 2379 men. Once again.
@@Holtorretje ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ i hope it was mostly good
Lucky number 3380 - he won the prize
Jealous? 😂
@@ChickFenwick ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ maybe
If you believe in divorce you don’t believe in marriage 🤷🏽♂️
Fine..
Anytime someone says something like this I just imagine the slave they have tied up in their basement. Terrified of divorce being legal 😂
Take it you don't believe in insurance either
@@kayceee6770 how is insurance the same as divorce, just curious?
@@pricklycatsNot surprised with the weak and uncommitted people we have today. What happened to fighting for a relationship and vows, these days it's easier to move on and some partners are toxic (show their true colors after marriage) 😂. Divorce is not the problem, the fake and weak people are the problem.
How did any women, much less this many of them, ever (in the first place) BUY the notion of "sleep your way to empowerment"? ... Would these same women buy "Jump off a bridge to find happiness"? Because the two ideas are equally obvious in their absurdity. (No offense intended to ladies who bought into either idea. No insult intended to those who believe jumping off a bridge will bring happiness. Sorry. It's just TRUE that it's as obviously bad an idea as "sleep your way to empowerment".)
I disagree with you.
To keep it short. Great sex can be a confidence builder/empowering and it's physically pleasurable.
In order to have great sex you have to try/pursue having sex.
It can feel constraining to not have sex on the basis of society telling you it's "bad".
The issue isn't about being slutty, the issue is that a meaningful percentage of the sex people are having isn't physically pleasurable enough (the orgasm gap).
Also, safety,people using each other and not being forthcoming or ignorant about what they want from their sexual encounters.
@@m.czandogg9576 Interesting. You assert that "sex can be a confidence builder". In your worldview, is someone's confidence being built on sex a good and healthy form or foundation of confidence?
If so, would you recommend/advise young ones to build their confidence on sex?
@@MylezNevison As long as sex is only a part of your foundational confidence, then it's fine.
Also, it can be a good sign because being great at sex can bleed over onto other non sexual aspects of life. For example, conscientiousness, proper reciprocity and effective non verbal and verbal communication.
Assuming young people are doing it properly then yes, I believe sex can be a good confidence builder.
But like I said above, it shouldn't be the MAIN foundation, only a part.
3:50 Already I disagree with her. If the relationship isn't working and things are already at the stage of divorce, just get it over with. Don't try to make it work for the kids sake. Yer just giving the kids bad messages and setting bad examples. It depends on why the relationship is failing though.
She's giving PTSD vibes on some questions 🤐
Bridget is such a great guest
BRIDGET WE LOVE YOU!! GREETS FROM AMSTERDAM🪩🍹
Zeihan makes bold claims, I was a believer. Now, I've seen his predictions fall flat, and the bias and TDS seep through
If you raise your child in a loveless/unhappy marriage, what are you teaching your children? If both parents truly love their children, you can co-parent well. My ex and I done so many things together after we separated, including family vacations. One without our significant others and one with them. We both genuinely want to see each other happy because that's what made our boys happy. Not saying she doesn't know what she's saying but she has definitely been in an echo chamber. You have to love your kids more than you hate your ex.
It worked for Kamala
You don't miss often, but this was a miss. Too shallow. Not a laughing matter. Talk to James Sexton if you want to offer your audience real insight.
Dumpster Fire is 🔥
The best!
She did not answer his question. He said the kids of gen x. She proceeds to talk about gen x.
I took that to mean Gen-X when they were kids
I noticed that too, but she did mention in her reply that the generation with the highest divorce rate is the Boomer generation. So with Gen X having the Boomers as their parents, Gen X have suffered the highest divorce rate from their parents.
It seems he just wasn't aware that the kids of Gen X, are not the ones who have gone through the highest parental divorce rates.
I must have missed that memo..
What a weird concept and something common sense would advise against.
I love dumpster fire!!! I need more of it
In light of our possible upcoming President, this title seems to be entirely untrue.
there being a male president now never caused you to rebut the arguments Chris has made about the declining state of the average man. Take your fallacies somewhere else.
Anything happens, they're most affected.
Why should we care when they're cult harms them? As well as everyone else?
Women can't have extreme attachment and find fickle reasons to leave ate the same time? ... Total BS
Anyone what article are they talking about, about the sleeping around?
Bridget rocks.
So much anger.
25:20 Yes it can. I do NOT think men should sleep around before marriage. However, the difference between promiscuous women and non-promiscuous women is in this very thing in fact. That’s exactly what they’re saying. I’m just a Christian, not part of some ‘manosphere.’
Promiscuous women are more likely to divorce their husbands, flat fact.
All In is like Fresh & Fit for Tech Bros what 😂
I’m curious when this was recorded. Evidently not after Biden announced he wouldn’t be the candidate.
If you weren’t married in the 50’s by your early 20’s there was something wrong with you
Catholic, Anglican , Presbyterian churches had influence & power
Women learned through through 1&2 world wars that given opportunity they were quite capable of men things
Education, feminism, me too movements give empowerment
Population, environmental , housing, financial issues effect choices for having/ wanting children
Yay she's here!
00:00: The Complexities of Divorce and Its Long-Term Effects
11:45: The Emotional Toll of Divorce and Shared Experiences
24:03: The Complexity of Attachment in Relationships
25:26: The Intersection of Intelligence and Societal Trends
27:23: The Complexity of Divorce and Personal Reflection
37:34: The Fluctuating Nature of Public Opinion and Accountability
47:25: The Evolving Landscape of Political Discourse
54:27: Ageism and Its Subtle Acceptance in Society
55:11: The Complexity of Racism and Identity
56:01: The Dynamics of Anti-Woke Sentiment and Political Power
01:03:18: Reflections on Empowerment and Personal Experiences
01:11:47: Exploring Casual Sex and Its Implications
01:12:54: The Balance Between Present Enjoyment and Future Regret
01:14:52: The Impact of Regret and Self-Disclosure on Personal Growth
01:26:22: The Role of Regret in Recovery and Personal Responsibility
01:36:51: Gender Dynamics in Regret and Recovery
01:48:23: Evolving Roles in Parenting and Community Dynamics
01:51:59: Navigating Modern Parenting Challenges
Summary by Awesum AI
Is it just me or does anybody else find all this unfocused, rambling and frankly boring?
He's a chad that encourages guys to be beta.
Maybe think about divorce from another perspective. We are animals, and there tend to be evolutionary reasons for our behavior. I can think of three: 1. getting out of bad situation (I think this is in the minority, as most divorces happen between regular people who someone else will find a perfectly ok partner), 2. Monetary benefit - I doubt this is it, we've had so little time with this benefit 3. Genetic variance for our offsprings - I think this is the most likely. When there is more variation, they most likely won't all have same genetic issues and are more likely to survive. This also explains infidelity. This is great news! We don't have to beat ourselves in the back with questions like "what did we do wrong?", unless you were drunk all the time or abusive.
Two ways of looking at Peter Zeihan - he's either a prophet or just severely over confident and the fact that most of what he talks about is so far in the future, where you couldn't possibly know how things will really turn out, I really feel like it's the latter. Most con artists are good at coming across as being something they're not, Elon Musk is a good example. The man is a disgracful idiot, but the general consensus is that he's a humanitarian genius...
So I sit on the fence with Zeihan and it's very much a game of wait and see, which is just life anyway.
We can't even reliably predict the weather more than about a week into the future, the system is too dynamic and chaotic, but someone can fortell human development, decades into the future, because he's well read? The people who make weather predictions are well read, you cannot read about what no one knows 🤷
i didn't finish this. she doesn't have any credentials. i think she's mostly right, but i think i'm right about a bunch of stuff. don't see me getting this platform. just a weird episode.
No one said she had "credentials", shes a podcast host who has had a lot of cultural relevance.
I'm listening to this after coming back from a 50th wedding anniversary. Most of us there have been in the same relationship for 35+ years. I guess we were different back then, but I am Gen X.
Peter Zeihan is just arrogant...FYI. Please dont confuse this with compentency.
Zeihan called the Ukraine war to like three months in like 2016. I think he's just super careful to only speak on factually based subjects. Demographics and geography are pretty damned objective.
“I thought everyone would remember COVID and go Republican when RVW was being overturned by crazy Republicans and the most far right court in recent history.” 😂 Now thats funny!