Preventing Divorce: Top 3 Life Hacks for Singles | George Blair-West | TEDxBrisbane

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  • Опубликовано: 18 ноя 2024
  • Psychiatrist Dr George Blair-West has a bold and empowering message about choosing a life partner and avoiding divorce: it can be hacked. Forget romantic destiny. When it comes to the all-important decision of selecting someone to share your life with - and the lives of your potential children - a romantic, loving heart must be met with an informed and thoughtful mind.​ Dr George Blair-West is an author, researcher and psychiatrist. He sub-specialises in trauma and relationship/sex therapy.
    In the 1990s, his peer-reviewed research papers literally rewrote the textbooks on suicide and depression. He then turned his focus to the overlooked research into the psychological forces that prevent weight loss. The bestselling Weight Loss for Food Lovers: Understanding our minds and why we sabotage our weight loss and related research papers led to media & speaking appearances around the world. In 2010 he was named one of the top 20 most influential obesity experts in the world.
    His inspirational novel, The Way of The Quest, was a ‘how to’ of finding one’s meaning and purpose in life and went on to receive three international awards. But it is helping people make sense of relationships that he sees as his most important work. He is currently writing his fourth book, How to Make the Most Important Decision of Your Life, with his dating coach daughter. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx

Комментарии • 101

  • @JoRoderick
    @JoRoderick 6 лет назад +84

    Fantastic video and information. The divorce rate would be very low if men and women married the right partners. That can only happen through self awareness. Most people don't actually know what brings them happiness. They are expecting others to *_make_* them happy.

    • @genevahnicole
      @genevahnicole 6 лет назад +2

      that is so true

    • @عظماة
      @عظماة 6 лет назад +1

      Yeah I totally agree

    • @JoRoderick
      @JoRoderick 6 лет назад +3

      @Azima Akbarova. For some people, it seems like they only learn these things too late. :)

    • @fiorenzalifonti6714
      @fiorenzalifonti6714 6 лет назад

      Cheers for the video content! Sorry for chiming in, I would appreciate your thoughts. Have you researched - Taparton Returning Love Takeover (just google it)? It is an awesome exclusive guide for learning how to stop divorce minus the normal expense. Ive heard some unbelievable things about it and my buddy after a lifetime of fighting got great success with it.

    • @comentario-ur8rd
      @comentario-ur8rd Месяц назад

      The right partner today can easily be the wrong partner in 5, 10 or 20 years

  • @pezpeculiar9557
    @pezpeculiar9557 6 лет назад +28

    TL;DR if you're in a rush:
    1. Wait to grow older
    2. Be influencable
    3. Be reliable and have your partner's back

    • @natnat5082
      @natnat5082 2 года назад +1

      Wasn't it, choose a partner who is influenceable? Make sure you both have equal power in decisions.

  • @elenakusevska6266
    @elenakusevska6266 6 лет назад +17

    Totally agree about the second point. I've always had the feeling that it is very hard to maintain a healthy relationship with a man that you can't convince about anything.

    • @FromFame
      @FromFame 5 лет назад

      Elena Kusevska I’ve had the same experience with women

  • @debrag8372
    @debrag8372 6 лет назад +7

    Reliability, he hit the nail on the head.

  • @How.Dare.You.
    @How.Dare.You. 6 лет назад +4

    Tinder guys dont know what it means to protect and stand by by someone

  • @elenakusevska6266
    @elenakusevska6266 6 лет назад +20

    The entire talk is an argument for a lifestyle choice. There are benefits to marrying young and having children young too. It's just a statistic. People should make their lifestyle choices based on what they want at that moment in their life.

    • @Cathee45
      @Cathee45 6 лет назад +5

      Yes. But for some decisions you have to think long-term (like having children). You may think you want them 'at that moment in your life' but you have to be sure that you will be happy with that choice forever.

  • @statusqueen8572
    @statusqueen8572 6 лет назад +18

    Marriage is not a problem...😋
    Marriage is a Priceless gift from God..👫

  • @RealistNo1
    @RealistNo1 6 лет назад +1

    It seems I've been carrying this entire marriage, which is WHY I am suffering from illness now, I think. I have never had that supportive issue from my partner. It's something I've accepted as a weakness he's suffered due to childhood issue. But it's affected me so long, I am thinking about what Dr. Blair-West says about leaving for my health/age's sake.

  • @RebeccaWhite30
    @RebeccaWhite30 6 лет назад +15

    Divorce wasn’t as prevalent because the laws didn’t protect women. Women stayed in abusive marriages because they couldn’t afford to leave. Regan changed that in California first.

    • @Aaron565
      @Aaron565 6 лет назад +1

      because that accounts for the rate of change. or the majority of relationships are abusive by your standards. Clearly your opinions are not backed by stats or proportional reasoning.

    • @fraydizs7302
      @fraydizs7302 6 лет назад

      RebeccaWhite30 now it's the exact opposite, and men aren't protected In marital situations. Interesting twist...

  • @samipeixoto4779
    @samipeixoto4779 6 лет назад +1

    Maybe we didn't had divorces back then. But, what to say about when one spouse (usually the man) just leave? This is something that happens till this day.
    I think he could have talked about a lot of things that couples could work on their relationships.
    And, I was a little upset when he said that we choose the man or woman to be the father or mother of our children. It's not the case to me, and I believe to many people this days, who do not want to have children.
    But I do agree with the tips that he gave. Maturity, one really knowing what he or she wants in life and relationships, having some experience, being open to compromise and ultimately being there for each other. It's about partnership, and what is best for both. Never to compete with one another. Always be gentle and thankful. I found this very helpful in my marriage. We had a hard start, but now, almost seven years later we're very happy and appreciative.

  • @TheSepia1
    @TheSepia1 6 лет назад

    Amazing Video!! It helped to change some of my views on marriage.

  • @bettyjoscookin3847
    @bettyjoscookin3847 6 лет назад +2

    What he said matched what I did....

  • @tobiekokot5635
    @tobiekokot5635 6 лет назад

    Great presentation and information. X

  • @hissendaud653
    @hissendaud653 6 лет назад

    Thanks for the Information

  • @alisonwinks6148
    @alisonwinks6148 3 года назад

    Great talk

  • @alipia561
    @alipia561 3 года назад +1

    Can influenceable also mean compromise?

  • @AirElegant
    @AirElegant 6 лет назад +1

    Great advice.

  • @hoangkimviet8545
    @hoangkimviet8545 6 лет назад +25

    Marriage is a problem, divorce is a bigger problem :-0

    • @JoRoderick
      @JoRoderick 6 лет назад

      Divorce is sometimes the solution to a bad marriage, but it costs a lot more. 😀

    • @freemusic7421
      @freemusic7421 6 лет назад

      Hoang Kim Viet Appreciate Video! Apologies for the intrusion, I would love your initial thoughts. Have you researched - Taparton Returning Love Takeover (do a google search)? It is a great one of a kind guide for learning how to stop divorce minus the headache. Ive heard some extraordinary things about it and my work buddy at last got great success with it.

  • @TreasureByMeasure
    @TreasureByMeasure 6 лет назад +1

    Good info. Got me thinking

  • @Erikazilla
    @Erikazilla 5 лет назад

    this is brilliant!

  • @abhishreetank2611
    @abhishreetank2611 Год назад

    Thanks

  • @KarthickKarthick-zm2ow
    @KarthickKarthick-zm2ow 6 лет назад

    thank you sir.

  • @meryrachelsolorzano9731
    @meryrachelsolorzano9731 6 лет назад

    Excellent!

  • @5even5eals
    @5even5eals 6 лет назад +6

    I thought 5 or 6 would be staying single.

    • @5even5eals
      @5even5eals 6 лет назад +1

      Both remained empty. At first I thought he was pumping up the drama, but he simply forgot about them.

  • @fieryelf
    @fieryelf 6 лет назад +2

    I guess as someone who's never and probably never will be in a relationship, I should be glad I'll never have to suffer through a heart break.

    • @nishisaxena4831
      @nishisaxena4831 6 лет назад +2

      fieryelf which means you have never experienced love and I would say you are extremely unlucky !!! Loving someone makes us vulnerable but it's one of the most amazing feeling ~~~ and being loved my someone whom you love, you should experience it once in your life !!! Life is meaningless without love ...

    • @christophepeto9867
      @christophepeto9867 4 года назад +1

      Never say never ! :p

  • @AlanClegg
    @AlanClegg 6 лет назад +3

    Just reading the title (at work and can't watch it yet) - "[...] Divorce [...] hacks for singles."
    I'm going to guess the answer is "don't get married".

  • @aa23aaa66
    @aa23aaa66 4 года назад +1

    espectacular.

  • @irreplacableable
    @irreplacableable 6 лет назад

    Superb stats ....

  • @Assoumy87
    @Assoumy87 6 лет назад

    Brilliant 🙏❤

  • @yourbrandstrategist9735
    @yourbrandstrategist9735 6 лет назад +19

    Marriage is the very first cause of divorce. I made a t-shirt about that.

    • @margobellamy6447
      @margobellamy6447 6 лет назад +2

      Sense of humor is very important, and seeing a psychologist to learn about your failed marriages is what we did before my husband and I married for 21 years.

    • @yourbrandstrategist9735
      @yourbrandstrategist9735 6 лет назад

      Margo Bellamy Yes, it is. And that’s how I’m saving myself from this all... I’d rather have someone chosing everyday to stay with me.

    • @MetaphysicalMike
      @MetaphysicalMike 6 лет назад

      Your Brand Strategist
      Do you have them available online
      would love to support your dreams:)

  • @stewardnyanchoka8344
    @stewardnyanchoka8344 6 лет назад

    I discovered this video on Secret Fixer Blueprint - there are lots awesome videos there that should help you

  • @Diamandinae
    @Diamandinae 6 лет назад +2

    Separated from Husband then he dies, Dad dies and no money to help me in the past year, about to lose my home sad!!! Still in shock!!

  • @livefreeordietrying5865
    @livefreeordietrying5865 6 лет назад +1

    Don’t depend on someone else for your happiness

  • @kemo5120
    @kemo5120 6 лет назад

    CEO of a charity cause this shht literally killed me...

  • @Abyssalfrequencies
    @Abyssalfrequencies 6 лет назад

    Merciiiiii, this is amazing

  • @AllatonceIvan
    @AllatonceIvan 6 лет назад +2

    Liked

  • @melike8888
    @melike8888 6 лет назад

    Lütfen Türkçe altyazı olsun 🙏

  • @khushalkhaitan5113
    @khushalkhaitan5113 6 лет назад

    Nice Video

  • @colorfuldays921
    @colorfuldays921 6 лет назад +2

    This guy sounds like my lecture...very interesting subject but the voice makes me sleepy 😴

    • @pezpeculiar9557
      @pezpeculiar9557 6 лет назад

      That's how more TedTalks usually are. You have to be interested about the subject to want to listen to it. Not all information is spoonfed, so you kind of just have to deal with it.

    • @colorfuldays921
      @colorfuldays921 6 лет назад

      pezpeculiar Sweetheart, I already know that since I watch Ted talks every day and just because his voice makes me sleepy, does not mean the subject is or was uninteresting. So! Read, digest and think before replying. Thanks though, you tried ;)

    • @pezpeculiar9557
      @pezpeculiar9557 6 лет назад

      Alrighty, ma'am. Have a nice decade.

    • @colorfuldays921
      @colorfuldays921 6 лет назад

      pezpeculiar hahaha Thanks

  • @hourkurda9644
    @hourkurda9644 6 лет назад

    The good way to keep partners ' relationship are
    1)man/woman must choose a good partener by studying all factors (comportement education etc.)
    2)he/her must be faithful and not envying from others men/women
    3) she must obey him and he must respect him, if you have any problems you would try together to solve them.
    In this case you could love each other and be happy but if you make your choice because this girl is beautiful or this guys is handsome romantic etc your relationship never be strong

    • @nishisaxena4831
      @nishisaxena4831 6 лет назад +1

      Most people love based only on outer looks ... that's so sad

    • @hourkurda9644
      @hourkurda9644 6 лет назад

      Bary why you're seeming astounded ?this is just a name

  • @walter_the_danger
    @walter_the_danger 6 лет назад +4

    Preventing divorce: don't get married

  • @sagdaosama4064
    @sagdaosama4064 4 года назад

    ممكن يتم الترجمه بالعربي بليييييز

  • @livefreeordietrying5865
    @livefreeordietrying5865 6 лет назад

    Just don’t

  • @livefreeordietrying5865
    @livefreeordietrying5865 6 лет назад

    Under 30 you embrace over you’re too stubborn

  • @neslihanbaysall
    @neslihanbaysall 6 лет назад +2

    Turkishhh😠😬😒😲😳i dont understandddd

    • @uybabayun
      @uybabayun 6 лет назад

      Beyini iyi seç, bir de geç yaşta evlen demiş.

  • @cida8838
    @cida8838 6 лет назад

    Tem tradução

  • @RemusKingOfRome
    @RemusKingOfRome 6 лет назад

    45 % of woman decided to line their pockets and get rid of their boring partner.

  • @schillermartin371
    @schillermartin371 6 лет назад

    dont married simple :)

  • @collectedworks4746
    @collectedworks4746 6 лет назад +8

    Worst TED talk I have ever seen.

    • @Pavel7918
      @Pavel7918 6 лет назад +1

      Collected Works Explain why.

    • @collectedworks4746
      @collectedworks4746 6 лет назад

      Tyler Jones Because he is using violence to solve problems.

    • @Pavel7918
      @Pavel7918 6 лет назад +1

      Collected Works I did not see that part, could you point it out for me?

    • @collectedworks4746
      @collectedworks4746 6 лет назад

      To him, Homosexuality is OK, Having affairs outside marriage is OK, Marriage after 30 years old is the best !!! If you all marry after 30, the man power of your country will decrease more and your country's development will be less. You will not able to retire early for your small children/child. You will have to stay with a headache in your old age. HIV is the creation of Homosexuality. And outside marriage affairs cause many many problems in the society.

    • @collectedworks4746
      @collectedworks4746 6 лет назад

      What will people do at the crucial time of their puberty to 30? Adultery?

  • @collectedworks4746
    @collectedworks4746 6 лет назад

    In Islam you can get your solutions. Your statistics are from America alone. It seems that the speaker likes to break rules and with that mind set he is giving advice to other people.