As a child growing up in an alcoholic family, I really appreciated the times I had in more functional family homes (e.g. staying at a classmate's house for the weekend). It was an oasis of peace, and also helped me to realise how abnormal my own family life was. I wasn't introduced to Al-Anon/Alateen until I was 18 which was really too late for me, but these groups can really help people living with an alcoholic to support each other through all the chaos/craziness.
I just had an episode right now with my mother I've been dealing with her for many many years with her alcoholism and I needed to hear that I'm not the crazy one and I'm not going through it it's her with her narcissistic and gaslighting behaviors you just educated me I'm already a spiritual person I believe in Jesus Christ but sometimes just talking to others or listening to videos can really help thank you so much!!!!!💯❤️❤️❤️
Thank you so, so deeply for this video. It's heartbreaking dealing with a high-functioning family member whilst dealing with a severe auto-immune disease of my own. I've been feeling so weighted by this but this helps so much. Thank you, thank you ❤️
Love the definition of what an alcoholic is. That IS the aspect that troubles me as someone who is a non drinker sharing a house with a person who fits that definition. All you say in this is good advice that I practice. I also maintain very tough boundaries with the person. That helps me and them for sure.
What defines alcoholism is the inability to go one year without a single drop. That's simple for a non-alcoholic. Alcoholism can be cured despite what AA says but it requires the alcoholic to make up their mind they are tired of living that way. Been 21 years for me and alcohol never crosses my mind anymore. I lost the desire the very day I quit. I'm glad those days are over. Never got in trouble with the law but I disappointed a lot of people as well as making stupid decisions all the time. Yes, it's a spiritual thing. You are so right about that.
Yes ma'ma my soon to be ex husband try to kill me three different times due to drinking and unhealed past childhood wounds as well I had to go to therapy for many year's and it caused PTSD due to the mental emotional and physical abuse I went thur but I got away and my life got much better
Thank you. This is such a hard topic. I'm married to a functional alcoholic and we have two small children together. I'm concerned about their future well-being. It's gradually dawning on me how serious thus is and how much I need support and education. Previously I've been keeping my husband's drinking a secret to protect his privacy, but it's wearing me down. I need help.
What if it is a child who is destroying themselves and being enabled by a sibling. They are abusive and out of control. What does a parent do when they refuse to accept treatment or help but continue to destroy the whole family?
Thank you. Oh my, I'm sorry. It's tough. Thankfully I didn't have to deal with it but my brother did as he was 15 years older. I felt the impact when he left. But thankfully my mom stood and played both roles as most good parents do.
I can certainly relate to this. My husband was an alcoholic and getting him to stop drinking was something I never thought would be so hard. It take years before he could completely say goodbye to it.
I had an ex girlfriend who unfortunately i have a daughter with who i found out later once the mask came off that she is a narcissist. She would beat on the kids and me emotionally and physically. I got away but i can't get my daughter away from her. All i can do is pray for her and keep checking and asking about the bruises on her. I met an amazing woman and we are getting married soon. I just wish the state would care enough about children to really do an investigation but they don't😥 i hate that they leave my daughter in such a horrible place. It eats me alive every day.
Mine too, infact I'm dealing with this ATM.. I'm about ready to walk directly out of her life for good.. For some reason I am the one who used to be able to get into her head, but it's both angering and heartbreaking.... I've spent far too much time and money trying to help her, throwing in the towel
I would like to know how an adult child of an alcoholic behaves. My mom had very rigid, black and white thinking. So how does that thinking impact her children? I think I’ve embraced or at least identified with that. I’m hyper vigilant, mood swings, self doubt etc. How do I heal (I’m in therapy for the umpteenth time).
Can you guys relate to this? Any tips you may want to share?
Yes. I can relate.
My tip is to hold on to those you love, as you said Tamara. Social support is EVERYTHING.
As a child growing up in an alcoholic family, I really appreciated the times I had in more functional family homes (e.g. staying at a classmate's house for the weekend). It was an oasis of peace, and also helped me to realise how abnormal my own family life was. I wasn't introduced to Al-Anon/Alateen until I was 18 which was really too late for me, but these groups can really help people living with an alcoholic to support each other through all the chaos/craziness.
I just had an episode right now with my mother I've been dealing with her for many many years with her alcoholism and I needed to hear that I'm not the crazy one and I'm not going through it it's her with her narcissistic and gaslighting behaviors you just educated me I'm already a spiritual person I believe in Jesus Christ but sometimes just talking to others or listening to videos can really help thank you so much!!!!!💯❤️❤️❤️
Thank you so, so deeply for this video. It's heartbreaking dealing with a high-functioning family member whilst dealing with a severe auto-immune disease of my own. I've been feeling so weighted by this but this helps so much. Thank you, thank you ❤️
You're welcome Georgie!! Thank you for watching and I'm glad this was helpful. 😊
Love the definition of what an alcoholic is. That IS the aspect that troubles me as someone who is a non drinker sharing a house with a person who fits that definition. All you say in this is good advice that I practice. I also maintain very tough boundaries with the person. That helps me and them for sure.
Absolutely! That's good for you. Some people struggle with this.
What defines alcoholism is the inability to go one year without a single drop. That's simple for a non-alcoholic. Alcoholism can be cured despite what AA says but it requires the alcoholic to make up their mind they are tired of living that way. Been 21 years for me and alcohol never crosses my mind anymore. I lost the desire the very day I quit. I'm glad those days are over. Never got in trouble with the law but I disappointed a lot of people as well as making stupid decisions all the time. Yes, it's a spiritual thing. You are so right about that.
And his mother drinks daily as well and when they all get together it gets crazy and dangerous.
Thank you for addressing this topic! The tips on taking care of yourself are very important!
Absolutely! You're welcome! If only I could take some of my own advice on self-care. LOL
@@TherapistTamaraHill indeed, I’m in the same boat!
Yes ma'ma my soon to be ex husband try to kill me three different times due to drinking and unhealed past childhood wounds as well I had to go to therapy for many year's and it caused PTSD due to the mental emotional and physical abuse I went thur but I got away and my life got much better
Thank you. This is such a hard topic. I'm married to a functional alcoholic and we have two small children together. I'm concerned about their future well-being. It's gradually dawning on me how serious thus is and how much I need support and education. Previously I've been keeping my husband's drinking a secret to protect his privacy, but it's wearing me down. I need help.
What if it is a child who is destroying themselves and being enabled by a sibling. They are abusive and out of control. What does a parent do when they refuse to accept treatment or help but continue to destroy the whole family?
Good info as usual. My grandfather was a functional alcoholic. How were you impacted having been exposed to the behavior of an alcoholic parent?
Thank you.
Oh my, I'm sorry. It's tough.
Thankfully I didn't have to deal with it but my brother did as he was 15 years older. I felt the impact when he left. But thankfully my mom stood and played both roles as most good parents do.
@@TherapistTamaraHill Thank you for your response. I look forward to the next topic.
I can certainly relate to this. My husband was an alcoholic and getting him to stop drinking was something I never thought would be so hard. It take years before he could completely say goodbye to it.
I'm very sorry. This is tough and something no wife or spouse wants to carry. It's a lonely road.
Thank you
You're welcome
I had an ex girlfriend who unfortunately i have a daughter with who i found out later once the mask came off that she is a narcissist. She would beat on the kids and me emotionally and physically. I got away but i can't get my daughter away from her. All i can do is pray for her and keep checking and asking about the bruises on her. I met an amazing woman and we are getting married soon. I just wish the state would care enough about children to really do an investigation but they don't😥 i hate that they leave my daughter in such a horrible place. It eats me alive every day.
My aunt is a alcoholic and it's really hard on me. How do I write her a letter without being rude or disrespectful
Mine too, infact I'm dealing with this ATM.. I'm about ready to walk directly out of her life for good.. For some reason I am the one who used to be able to get into her head, but it's both angering and heartbreaking.... I've spent far too much time and money trying to help her, throwing in the towel
I would like to know how an adult child of an alcoholic behaves. My mom had very rigid, black and white thinking. So how does that thinking impact her children? I think I’ve embraced or at least identified with that. I’m hyper vigilant, mood swings, self doubt etc. How do I heal (I’m in therapy for the umpteenth time).