I am an introvert, people often mistake me for being shy and withdrawn, but when I handle the mic to speak at a function or engage some one in a conversation they are blown away. Though I grew up with a strict Dad, I have learned to be reserved and speak at the right time. It helps me think and plan and also earn respect too. I am also a born leader
I was stuttering and hard of hearing and the worst thing shyness controlled my life, we started a soup kitchen on the side of the road feeding the hungry, l remember a lots kids were coming and thats how l started to be open with the kids , reading bible stories, in the midst of that God heals me of my stuttering and my ears started to hear properly, l gained confidence through just feeding the children, and today lm teaching some skills to women who are unemployed in our community l have also started businesses of selling used clothes and furniture , lm still feeding the kids in the local community also , the bondage has been broken through touching other people's people s lives
Confidence is everything, I realized this and I am actively trying to bring myself out of it. I can say for free that Shyness has 0 benefit, no single gain of being shy. I have wasted so many years in this, it is well.
There's a difference between shyness and introversion. Introverts just love spending time alone. Not that they don't like people but they draw lot of energy from introspection and self reflection which can only be done when alone. Shyness is when you judge yourself before others judges you. You're afraid of how others will think of you if you express or behave in a certain way. It worsen when you're an overthinker which can lead to anxiety and even depression This mostly happens to people who undergone toxic parenthood between ages 3- 8 which is the age when a human psychological structure is formed. To break free you first need to accept your current situation,it's okay to be that way but you need to change.. set boundaries and always know you're only responsible on the way you express yourself but how others think of it, or react to it is none of business. You don't have to be perfect , just express your feelings it's very liberating , whatever it is, anger, love, dissatisfaction. People are attracted to those who express themselves genuinely not those who hold on to their feelings just to impress others. Take a deep breathe when your mind start stressing then face your situation head on. Constantly write down your thoughts and feelings it really helps into bringing out what is held in your heart and mind. I know this sounds like another self help Google shit , but that stuff works. I was also a nerdy and shy little kid but once I realized how toxic parenthood had damaged my psychological make up I started a detox by taking some of the above measures and I'm free now. You're the most amazing being in the galaxy. You're unstoppable, only you who can stop you, you only have power over what is happening within you not what is happening around you, you can't control that.
It start by believing in your self,my mom and my brother made me shy no one listened to me my young age I became silent at age of ten till 25yrs I gave birth to my baby and I refuse her to be shy so I had to stand my ground for me and for her,think I couldn't do I did it for her now am shyness free
I grew up a very shy, timid and unexpressive lady due to some of the reasons you stated. It affected me badly and made me loose series of opportunities. In addition to the reasons you mentioned, I was also not comfortable with my body as a female compared to others my age.. I have a very small stature which affected my body development in the right areas I always feel shy and unsafe around other females most especially in a gathering. The feeling of not been good enough and maybe ugly clouded me so much I always feel like the odd one in the midst of others I am still going through this but probably not as bad as it was while growing up In all sincerity I was crying while listening to you and still crying because you're absolutely right about all you said
Listening to Winnie in this video, it felt like she was describing me 100%….. I need to add that your comment describes my experience 101%. My struggle with timidity started in secondary when I became conscious that I had a very small stature and a disproportionate body. Now that I am in my 30s, I still can’t say I am over it😢. I agree that the struggle with shyness and timidity is a lot different when it bothers around one’s body. I can’t even count the number of opportunities I have passed on because of the feeling of inadequacy ( a ripple effect of timidity). I pray that God gives you complete victory over the feeling of not being good enough 🤗🙏
I was a shy type as a result of my poor family background, the type of clothes I wore made me feel inferior and shy. I also have a small stature which made me hate my appearance, I would always wish to be like my friends because they look older than their age unlike me, I look far too younger than my age. The day that poor mindset changed and I stopped wishing to be like my friends was the day I lost one of my friends😞 I so much adored and admired this girl to an extent that I wished I will be her. A few years after our secondary school education she died. That fateful day I cried and asked God to forgive me for not being proud of whom he created me to be. If God had exchanged us like I wished by now i won't be tying this because I would probably be six feet below 👇 Thank God he's God, I thank God for his mercy because I would have been dead and forgotten by now I'm super grateful and I appreciate this life that I have, small or big stature, tall or short I no send.... I Thank God For The Gift Of Life, it's a precious gift that a lot are wishing to have but they are no more.
That was how I started appreciating this beautiful statue of mine, I no longer see it as small honestly....I now see it as the best... because no other person has it, it's unique to me and From the depth of my heart, I Thank God For it
Not all introverts are shy. People think I'm shy and timid until we have a conversation and they are shocked. I won't go out of my way to talk to you or give welcoming smiles but you'll definitely have a memorable conversation with me and meet a very interesting, chatty and well informed person beneath the quietness. If you have a lot to offer and you're a deep thinker you'll be okay with being quiet, it doesn't mean you're shy and if you give a lot of value when you speak you won't be eager to talk a lot.
You are absolutely right. Being shy is not totally bad in itself. Some personalities described above have low self esteem issues not particularly ‘shy’
@@beatriceogidi176 That's not true. Some people don't just like the spotlight, we can't all be extroverts and it does not mean there's something wrong with you. If the spotlight comes 🤷🏻♀️ fine, learn how to handle it (that's my advice for introverts) you have to train yourself to be comfortable when such comes, it won't make sense running away when recognition for your good deeds come. And if does not you're totally fine too. If you're called to speak or lead don't run away either, that's where the training comes in. I'm also an introvert, if you call me to speak I'm fine, if you don't I'm fine too. And I don't like people are desperate to have the spotlight on them and talk too much (some will lie in the process of talking and just have many tricks up their sleeves) sometimes you just want to tell them to rest, not because you hate them but because you're tired of them being in your face and you want to see something different and fresh.
My mum used to tell me ‘behave yourself you don’t know who’s watching and would start talking’ that really made me to be so self conscious especially in public like I should be at my best behavior at all times
I totally can relate with this…but you can break free if you think this is doing you more harm than good. It’s great to be well mannered but it’s also very okay to express yourself at your most authentic self.
I totally can relate with this…but you can break free if you think this is doing you more harm than good. It’s great to be well mannered but it’s also very okay to express yourself at your most authentic self.
I think the solution is . Checking your need for validation. Have confidence in your self first stop waiting for people to compliment you because it attracts fake people. If you check your need for validation you will be able to filter out potential bad friends or spouse. Secondly stop laughing at yourself because the subconscious part of your brain doesn't know you are joking. Sometimes we hide our fear and anxiety in jokes whenever we are alone or talking to our friends. Consciously talk about your self in a good way. Don't talk down on yourself. Lastly forget regret take the lessons and move on. When's you realize something you think you should have realized a long time don't beat yourself up just take the right steps and better your life.
I broke down watching this. Everything you spoke about speaks to me. You are lucky to have figured this out earlier on in your life. I'm in my ealy 30's and I still have this shyness fully, it chokes me every second. I'm in a phase where I'm constantly working on unlocking myself but it is the hardest thing to do. I literary have no major friend, can't initiate friendship nor sustain them and I feel so socially awkward. I also realise that I attract men who are like me, currently dating one whose shyness is on a higher level than mine but I'm still holding on because it is even more difficult to get a 'hello' from anyone. This is hard and it's worst than a sickness. I don't wish this kind of upbringing on anyone. I'm so happy I came across your video today. Feels like therapy but undoing everything at this stage is tough.
Yes. I’m so glad she made this video because this is what I’m currently battling with and somehow it helps me understand what is wrong I couldn’t understand I didn’t know what it’s called until this video it really enlightened me. My trauma has a great deal to do with it. Not childhood but still during my formative years, during adolescence 17-20yrs. I can’t get a friend or friends a that I really would like or be in a supportive circle, can’t get myself to speak or act quickly enough and just watch things or people pass me by I’m incredibly sad and depressed and just shut off completely I don’t even expect a hello from anyone I just keep it moving.
It amazes me many people are actually dealing with shyness a.k.a timidity. I used to be exactly as you have described yourself. Though I still battle with shyness bur most people don't know . I grew up with an abusive stepmother and she always rang it in my ears that I wasn't good enough so I grew up with thr notion that I wasn't worthy to be anyone's friend, worthy to have the best of things e.t c. How did I deconstruct? I will tell you. In 2012, someone gave a book called the rhapsody of realities and I learnt about the holyspirit. Guess what, I don't have confidence in myself till date 😅. I have confidence in the holyspirit that lives in me and that has led me to do amazing things that even my family members are in awe of. First I went from being average in class to being top 3 without even trying. First masters degree holder in my family(acquired abroad), most travelled. I can't name all. If you want to improve sis, you can learn to have intimate relationship with the holyspirit. You will amaze yourself like I did.
I am over 50 years now and still timid and shy person I want to come out of it. Very happy to watch this vidoe today. I wnt to be able to talk to people due to my work now.
This is so relatable. From being raised by overly strict dad, to having hormonal acne and all, I think I went from an extremely bold little girl to an easily intimidated adult.
For me. I am shy because I dont feel intelligent enough to contribute to whatever is been communicated so i just withdraw and allow every other person do the talking. Truth is i was a talkative while growing up.
This is my life right now. I literally had to search "how to become confident" and I found this video. I'm so shy, I suffer from low self-esteem to the extent that when people say I'm beautiful or compliments me I won't even believe it, it's so bad that I cannot raise my head up and give eye contacts , my friends take advantage of me because they know that if they say sh*t to me, I wouldn't even stand-up for myself. I stutter when I speak, I mix my words . I'm tired of that life and I want to change and be better for myself, I know I will. Thanks Winnie for this eye-opening video❤.
Hi Winnie❤ I can't express enough how much your School of Elegance has transformed my life. Your wisdom, guidance, and encouragement have not only boosted my confidence but have also inspired me to start my own RUclips channel. Your content is a constant source of inspiration, and I find myself returning to your videos and emails daily for motivation and new ideas. Your elegance and poise are truly remarkable, and I aspire to reach your level of excellence. To take my channel to the next level and produce high-quality content, I would be incredibly grateful for any advice or support you could offer, particularly in terms of equipment like a good camera. I am eager to create videos that reflect the same level of sophistication and professionalism that you exemplify. Thank you for being such an amazing mentor and role model. Your impact on my life is immeasurable, and I look forward to continuing this journey with your invaluable guidance. With deepest gratitude and admiration, Bridgit.
Watching this video is like my own life played right in my face. This video made me cry tears. It feels like my own life's documentary. Yeah, I am a man and introvert. Many people find me "awkward" and do things to me and get away with it and I won't say or do anything. My work life has become a burden on my life. Having to go to work everyday has become a a serious burden and draining my life. But I am working on rebuilding myself and break away from this social trap. It is possible
I am an introvert, people hardly talk to me and felt excluded and withdrawn from their presence. One thing that kept me going is saying positive things to myself and not being concerned about what other people say about me. I had a really strict over protective parent who doesn't like me visiting friends, going out ,staying indoors etc like that. Glory be to God for praying and asking him for boldness to speak infront of crowd without fridgeting at all ,i am actually happy staying out of my comfort zone and moving to a place i will be known and recognised.
You are describing me. That's EXACTLY how shy I am. And yes, it keeps you back in life and opportunities pass you by. I am listening to you and learn how you got free from it
This is so me. At my age I'm still shy and very much introverted. Always keep to my self and like my own space but because I'm into business I'm feeling the negative side of being shy because I'm not able to put myself out there and mingle. It could be a disadvantage at it's best. I really need to break free and be social. Waiting for part 2. I really enjoy your videos. Very inspiring and educational. Thanks once again Winnie
Growing up as a kid, I remember being an expressive child. I could speak anywhere, my parents encouraged me so much. But I noticed that as i grew up, I became more reserved. I dunno what happened to my childhood boldness because it did not follow me into adulthood. It could be as a result of the points you raised. But one thing I know for sure is that, boldness lies in each of us and what will spring it out happens to people at different times. For me, it’s injustice or being taken for granted. I can push away my reservations and deal with it accordingly😅. For me shyness is not an absolute term, something pressing can bring you out of that comfort zone and even make you forget you were the shy type even if it’s for a minute.
Thank you so much Ms Winnie this video is my entire life am a 16 yr old and very shy and timid cant wait to here the tips to break free crom it permanently i have been struggling with this since i knew myself ❤❤❤
Parents need to encourage their children who are shy. I do that with my daughter. She is shy too & now trying out school activities & keeps getting beta. Thanks for this. ❤❤
I was scolded for talking a lot. As the last child, my elder siblings will always scold me for engaging in their conversations whenever they’re talking. They’ll tell me that my mates are not there so I shouldn’t get involved. This has really dealt with my communication and social life.
Yeah, exactly what happened to me, people will be telling my Mom this chat girl is too lousy and all. At the end, I was bottled up. Up till now I'm still struggling. Always alone, can't express myself, and it hurts a lot.
This is me oooo… last child of 8kids…and i know for sure it has affected me negatively in my life. I was naturally born a “gbaza queen” … however i hv grown into a shadow of someone else. I look at my second daughter… how active, bright and very sociable she is. I look at her and can tell this is a mirror of me. However, i hv become something else
As a child, It is rude to engage when adults are having a conversation.. Children ought to be trained and corrected by their elders to ensure proper upbringing.. but the elders should correct tactfully.. When I was a child my elder siblings and cousins talked a lot around me, I listened and learned without adding my voice to the conversation because they weren't talking to me.. While it is good to encourage children to be expressive it is also more important to equip them with good morals.. Children these days are morally bankrupt and engage in all sorts of vices because their parents, in ignorance and laziness, have failed to give them proper upbringing
Thanks so much for sharing and being a blessing! I agree with you. I can be shy at times. And it comes from my childhood, my true self being suppressed, made fun of, and or ignored by my Mom. In spite of it, I’m doing well now. Knowledge is power. Keep up the good work. ❤
OMG I see so much of myself in you especially when you talked about how expressive you were when you were a child but grew up to be timid same here with me
It's my university period that hurt me the most, shy , timid but you cant intimidate me always because I'm sturbon, the difference is how i react without composure. My last academic activity in school my project defense, i practiced and prayed a million time and after i succeeded, even lecturers were surprised cos they said they dont know i cant talk, i got A in my project defence. They said that because of the way i was in class, they didn't atleast that i know something at all.
I thought I was the only one who thought at a point in time that my parents weren't my real parents, the way they chastise in public eh and also several times you have to apologize to your elder ones just because they're older even though you're right with what you said.....to the point you will literally felt like your opinion is not needed on any matter just because you're the last born and the rest are way older.
There is something funny about people with these traits, they perform excellently when they want to. They don’t rush for the mic and they don’t rush to be noticed but when they decide to shine, they shine brightly. Choose your battles right.
You have to take it to God in prayer and repent for allowing the spirit of fear to consume you. War with words!!!! Use the word of God and fast if you need to. Shyness is a spirit an evil one and definitely not from God❤
Exactly Ma'am! This is me. I'm still working on it. My parents especially dad so strict. It made me dislike him till he passed on when i was a teenager. 🤦
Thanks for sharing. I have been there before. Thank God I have overcome that. I could even feel the pain in your voice as you shared your story. Take big HUG
I agree with you 100% for me when I was a growing kid I never played with my fellow young children my dad keeps us at home for a very long time with Jesus Christ everything is possible thanks
Wow! Watching this must be so divinely orchestrated. I was just meditating on what I've become a few days ago and I can relate to everything you said here. Some of our parents subconsciously allowed us develop this traits because that was what they knew best at the time. I am now in a developed country and I can see the difference in how children are been raised here. Thank you Winnie. I'm so glad I watched this.
My dad beat me a lot because I was really stubborn now I have my own child I beat him over any small tin but I really wan d best for my son , more of d time I dt like way my mom shut my son up anytime he talks 😢 , Tanx for dis video I pray I change so quickly
You have to do everything within your power to break the cycle. You can try to gradually reduce being harsh. When he annoys you, try to address the particular thing he did wrong through COMMUNICATION. You may fall back to your previous attitude but determine to stop. Think of what's at stake (you're destroying someone you love). Ask yourself if what your son just did wrong is more powerful than your love for him. I wish you the best.
This is so me dear And it's killing me I don't want it😢 Sometimes I just see people who are so bold and I wish I'm like them😢😢 It's hurt breaking I only feel comfortable at home or within my close friends But when I step out from them it's like hell I feel like I'm poisoned
I have phobia for crowd and I have been praying to God to help me fight it because that is one thing I hate about me can’t talk smoothly in public can’t express my self ,Winnie thank you for this video and I am patiently waiting for the next one on how u were able to fight it
You know while I was listening...you said something that struck me. You said shyness can even deprive one of every opportunities that comes one's way... and also judging from your own experience, I have come to realize that is a matter of time, moreover it's just a phase of life...To be honest, I am a shy person , but I believe am gradually coming out from that shackles. Thank you ma'am for this great impacts You are such a wonderful and amazing person.
I call you my role model cos that’s what you are to me. Learnt a lot from you than I did in school or any other platform. I love you. Thank you for all you do❤❤
I'm even too shy to make a comment. to the point I can't really express myself and this has affected me in my career and my skill. people always commend me of how talented I am but I feel its not enough to be showcased to the public. but then I know the source of all this shyness( which is my elder brother; in as much as he's supportive, he always puts PRESSURE on me and all of that makes me really overwhelmed, being afraid of living with people. but I believe its just for a time and I'm working towards networking and socializing with humans. thank you Winnie for sharing your experience. it was a relief.
Your child can go to boarding from Jss one Pat. All you do is to build self confidence in that child from home. I used to think like that before until I joined a parenting academy. It is what you build in your child that the child will go out to display.
Silver or Gold I have not...but I will keep blessing you from the depth of my heart. Thanks for dropping such transformational speech. Ma God Bless You More Grace Ma
Im still in the process of overcoming shyness, but i can say as i grow older, i got knowledge, i started loving myself and abilities, i got closer to God and its working for me😊
This made me nearly tear up because this is literally my life. All the examples you gave about old Winnie, in functions, outside my comfort zone, in my relationship, the over protective parents
I'm really waiting for how you broke free from shyness. One thing about I've noticed about been shy is that it literally make me belief every other person is better than me and even when i want to intentionally develop myself this thought that i will still stammer when i come to the public kills the vibe. Please, we are waiting for the next video.
Parenting plays a huge role. What's funny is that I recently met someone who as an adult, is so shy that it affects virtually every aspect of her life but she doesn't seem to mind or be in a hurry.
You will overcome this in Jesus name. Dont miss next week’s episode okay. It will give you some insight on how to tackle it. In the meantime, start affirming to yourself “I am a very confident and bold woman, and I have the ability to express myself confidently and boldly.”
Everything you said is absolutely true, I've really suffered so much for being an introvert, even finding it so difficult to socialize with people. But thank I'm breaking free already from this shackles of self-doubt, inferiority complex and lots more that comes with shyness. Thanks Miss Winnie for sharing your story to inspire others ❤
@@invertedbeautifultimid there means fear/shy, not being an introvert. Except you're referring to someone who's both an introvert and exhibits shyness
@@IsiomaNzemekenope, what I experienced wasn’t anything related to being an introvert… it was full blown shyness! Cos I am naturally a very expressive and open person and I am also very big on interacting with people.
I wasn’t talking about introverts in this video… What I experienced wasn’t anything related to being an introvert… it was full blown shyness! Cos I am naturally a very expressive, open person and I am also very big on interacting with people.
For real strict parenting actually affects a child's confidence you begin to lack abilities to socialize and creat bonds with your mates and become so conscious of yourself
Thanks so much for sharing this, it’s as though u can read me through & through, very conversational and bold around my own people but will rather be by myself outside my comfort zone & avoid social functions
I am an introvert, people often mistake me for being shy and withdrawn, but when I handle the mic to speak at a function or engage some one in a conversation they are blown away. Though I grew up with a strict Dad, I have learned to be reserved and speak at the right time. It helps me think and plan and also earn respect too. I am also a born leader
Same over here
And I had a really strict dad
But I guess it did me alot of good
Totally relate
Same here
Yes❤😊
I can relate to your statement.
I was stuttering and hard of hearing and the worst thing shyness controlled my life, we started a soup kitchen on the side of the road feeding the hungry, l remember a lots kids were coming and thats how l started to be open with the kids , reading bible stories, in the midst of that God heals me of my stuttering and my ears started to hear properly, l gained confidence through just feeding the children, and today lm teaching some skills to women who are unemployed in our community l have also started businesses of selling used clothes and furniture , lm still feeding the kids in the local community also , the bondage has been broken through touching other people's people s lives
Do you have a community i will love to join
Wisdom of solomon 16:12 For neither herb nor poultice cured them,
but it was your word, O Lord, that heals all people.
@@ataramsimon8954Me too 🙏
To me the solution to shyness is knowledge, when a person is well informed, shy cannot survive, it becomes very surmountable..
I totally agree with you
Very correct, knowledge is the solution to shyness. I overcame my shyness when I became well informed
Knowledge from where please... Books or what?
knowledge from similar experiences with people and books @@ifeanyipaul6762
You’re right
Confidence is everything, I realized this and I am actively trying to bring myself out of it. I can say for free that Shyness has 0 benefit, no single gain of being shy. I have wasted so many years in this, it is well.
My friend, shyness is very disturbing but it has some good benefits, about 80 percent of shy people are intelligent and do well early in life
Not all introvert are shy , some are reserved to speak sense
True ❤😊
Well said
Very true!!!!
Very true
Exactly my point ☝️
There's a difference between shyness and introversion. Introverts just love spending time alone. Not that they don't like people but they draw lot of energy from introspection and self reflection which can only be done when alone.
Shyness is when you judge yourself before others judges you. You're afraid of how others will think of you if you express or behave in a certain way. It worsen when you're an overthinker which can lead to anxiety and even depression This mostly happens to people who undergone toxic parenthood between ages 3- 8 which is the age when a human psychological structure is formed.
To break free you first need to accept your current situation,it's okay to be that way but you need to change.. set boundaries and always know you're only responsible on the way you express yourself but how others think of it, or react to it is none of business. You don't have to be perfect , just express your feelings it's very liberating , whatever it is, anger, love, dissatisfaction. People are attracted to those who express themselves genuinely not those who hold on to their feelings just to impress others.
Take a deep breathe when your mind start stressing then face your situation head on.
Constantly write down your thoughts and feelings it really helps into bringing out what is held in your heart and mind. I know this sounds like another self help Google shit , but that stuff works. I was also a nerdy and shy little kid but once I realized how toxic parenthood had damaged my psychological make up I started a detox by taking some of the above measures and I'm free now.
You're the most amazing being in the galaxy. You're unstoppable, only you who can stop you, you only have power over what is happening within you not what is happening around you, you can't control that.
This is what I need to hear from someone. This piece made my day. Thank you. I will work on this measure.
Wow, thank you
Omor U need to open your own RUclips channel
I love this write up, you're thoughtful.
Thank you 😊
It’s not easy to come out of it…I broke in tears when i realized i had missed so much in life
Hmm
It start by believing in your self,my mom and my brother made me shy no one listened to me my young age I became silent at age of ten till 25yrs I gave birth to my baby and I refuse her to be shy so I had to stand my ground for me and for her,think I couldn't do I did it for her now am shyness free
If you were once a shy person, you would understand what she's saying
Exactly
True
Exactly so!
True
Very true.
I grew up a very shy, timid and unexpressive lady due to some of the reasons you stated.
It affected me badly and made me loose series of opportunities.
In addition to the reasons you mentioned, I was also not comfortable with my body as a female compared to others my age..
I have a very small stature which affected my body development in the right areas
I always feel shy and unsafe around other females most especially in a gathering.
The feeling of not been good enough and maybe ugly clouded me so much
I always feel like the odd one in the midst of others
I am still going through this but probably not as bad as it was while growing up
In all sincerity I was crying while listening to you and still crying because you're absolutely right about all you said
Listening to Winnie in this video, it felt like she was describing me 100%….. I need to add that your comment describes my experience 101%.
My struggle with timidity started in secondary when I became conscious that I had a very small stature and a disproportionate body. Now that I am in my 30s, I still can’t say I am over it😢.
I agree that the struggle with shyness and timidity is a lot different when it bothers around one’s body. I can’t even count the number of opportunities I have passed on because of the feeling of inadequacy ( a ripple effect of timidity).
I pray that God gives you complete victory over the feeling of not being good enough 🤗🙏
I was a shy type as a result of my poor family background, the type of clothes I wore made me feel inferior and shy.
I also have a small stature which made me hate my appearance, I would always wish to be like my friends because they look older than their age unlike me, I look far too younger than my age.
The day that poor mindset changed and I stopped wishing to be like my friends was the day I lost one of my friends😞 I so much adored and admired this girl to an extent that I wished I will be her. A few years after our secondary school education she died.
That fateful day I cried and asked God to forgive me for not being proud of whom he created me to be.
If God had exchanged us like I wished by now i won't be tying this because I would probably be six feet below 👇 Thank God he's God, I thank God for his mercy because I would have been dead and forgotten by now
I'm super grateful and I appreciate this life that I have, small or big stature, tall or short I no send....
I Thank God For The Gift Of Life, it's a precious gift that a lot are wishing to have but they are no more.
That was how I started appreciating this beautiful statue of mine, I no longer see it as small honestly....I now see it as the best... because no other person has it, it's unique to me and
From the depth of my heart, I Thank God For it
Not all introverts are shy. People think I'm shy and timid until we have a conversation and they are shocked. I won't go out of my way to talk to you or give welcoming smiles but you'll definitely have a memorable conversation with me and meet a very interesting, chatty and well informed person beneath the quietness. If you have a lot to offer and you're a deep thinker you'll be okay with being quiet, it doesn't mean you're shy and if you give a lot of value when you speak you won't be eager to talk a lot.
You make a valid point but this video is strictly about shyness not introverts…there’s a clear difference.
You are absolutely right. Being shy is not totally bad in itself. Some personalities described above have low self esteem issues not particularly ‘shy’
@@busayoomisanya3798 inferiority complex
Is there any difference between being shy and having low self esteem? People that are shy have low self esteem
@@beatriceogidi176 That's not true. Some people don't just like the spotlight, we can't all be extroverts and it does not mean there's something wrong with you. If the spotlight comes 🤷🏻♀️ fine, learn how to handle it (that's my advice for introverts) you have to train yourself to be comfortable when such comes, it won't make sense running away when recognition for your good deeds come. And if does not you're totally fine too. If you're called to speak or lead don't run away either, that's where the training comes in. I'm also an introvert, if you call me to speak I'm fine, if you don't I'm fine too. And I don't like people are desperate to have the spotlight on them and talk too much (some will lie in the process of talking and just have many tricks up their sleeves) sometimes you just want to tell them to rest, not because you hate them but because you're tired of them being in your face and you want to see something different and fresh.
My mum used to tell me ‘behave yourself you don’t know who’s watching and would start talking’ that really made me to be so self conscious especially in public like I should be at my best behavior at all times
I totally can relate with this…but you can break free if you think this is doing you more harm than good.
It’s great to be well mannered but it’s also very okay to express yourself at your most authentic self.
I totally can relate with this…but you can break free if you think this is doing you more harm than good.
It’s great to be well mannered but it’s also very okay to express yourself at your most authentic self.
Please ma
What's the curse recommended for it
I think the solution is . Checking your need for validation. Have confidence in your self first stop waiting for people to compliment you because it attracts fake people. If you check your need for validation you will be able to filter out potential bad friends or spouse. Secondly stop laughing at yourself because the subconscious part of your brain doesn't know you are joking. Sometimes we hide our fear and anxiety in jokes whenever we are alone or talking to our friends. Consciously talk about your self in a good way. Don't talk down on yourself. Lastly forget regret take the lessons and move on. When's you realize something you think you should have realized a long time don't beat yourself up just take the right steps and better your life.
I broke down watching this. Everything you spoke about speaks to me. You are lucky to have figured this out earlier on in your life. I'm in my ealy 30's and I still have this shyness fully, it chokes me every second. I'm in a phase where I'm constantly working on unlocking myself but it is the hardest thing to do. I literary have no major friend, can't initiate friendship nor sustain them and I feel so socially awkward. I also realise that I attract men who are like me, currently dating one whose shyness is on a higher level than mine but I'm still holding on because it is even more difficult to get a 'hello' from anyone. This is hard and it's worst than a sickness. I don't wish this kind of upbringing on anyone. I'm so happy I came across your video today. Feels like therapy but undoing everything at this stage is tough.
I wish I can give you a hug right now 🫂🫂🫂
Yes. I’m so glad she made this video because this is what I’m currently battling with and somehow it helps me understand what is wrong I couldn’t understand I didn’t know what it’s called until this video it really enlightened me. My trauma has a great deal to do with it. Not childhood but still during my formative years, during adolescence 17-20yrs. I can’t get a friend or friends a that I really would like or be in a supportive circle, can’t get myself to speak or act quickly enough and just watch things or people pass me by I’m incredibly sad and depressed and just shut off completely I don’t even expect a hello from anyone I just keep it moving.
This is me completely 😢😢😢. I'm 30 and very shy
It amazes me many people are actually dealing with shyness a.k.a timidity. I used to be exactly as you have described yourself. Though I still battle with shyness bur most people don't know . I grew up with an abusive stepmother and she always rang it in my ears that I wasn't good enough so I grew up with thr notion that I wasn't worthy to be anyone's friend, worthy to have the best of things e.t c. How did I deconstruct? I will tell you. In 2012, someone gave a book called the rhapsody of realities and I learnt about the holyspirit. Guess what, I don't have confidence in myself till date 😅. I have confidence in the holyspirit that lives in me and that has led me to do amazing things that even my family members are in awe of. First I went from being average in class to being top 3 without even trying. First masters degree holder in my family(acquired abroad), most travelled. I can't name all. If you want to improve sis, you can learn to have intimate relationship with the holyspirit. You will amaze yourself like I did.
Really, it took me back to the days. I'm breaking free already. Thanks Winnie.
I am over 50 years now and still timid and shy person I want to come out of it. Very happy to watch this vidoe today. I wnt to be able to talk to people due to my work now.
You're so right on how playing with friends, enemies and neighbors help to develop social skills as a child.
This is me. I teared up upon hearing…” watch opportunities pass me by” only God knows how many I missed.
😢
You not alone dear.
That's why we need the spirit of God to embolden us
This is so relatable. From being raised by overly strict dad, to having hormonal acne and all, I think I went from an extremely bold little girl to an easily intimidated adult.
For me. I am shy because I dont feel intelligent enough to contribute to whatever is been communicated so i just withdraw and allow every other person do the talking. Truth is i was a talkative while growing up.
😢
Wonder what changed
😢
Me too especially with English language 😢
Same here pls what can I do blc am tiring
U are very right, this has really affect me in many ways . Thanks for sharing.
This is my life right now. I literally had to search "how to become confident" and I found this video. I'm so shy, I suffer from low self-esteem to the extent that when people say I'm beautiful or compliments me I won't even believe it, it's so bad that I cannot raise my head up and give eye contacts , my friends take advantage of me because they know that if they say sh*t to me, I wouldn't even stand-up for myself. I stutter when I speak, I mix my words . I'm tired of that life and I want to change and be better for myself, I know I will. Thanks Winnie for this eye-opening video❤.
Hi Winnie❤
I can't express enough how much your School of Elegance has transformed my life. Your wisdom, guidance, and encouragement have not only boosted my confidence but have also inspired me to start my own RUclips channel. Your content is a constant source of inspiration, and I find myself returning to your videos and emails daily for motivation and new ideas.
Your elegance and poise are truly remarkable, and I aspire to reach your level of excellence. To take my channel to the next level and produce high-quality content, I would be incredibly grateful for any advice or support you could offer, particularly in terms of equipment like a good camera. I am eager to create videos that reflect the same level of sophistication and professionalism that you exemplify.
Thank you for being such an amazing mentor and role model. Your impact on my life is immeasurable, and I look forward to continuing this journey with your invaluable guidance.
With deepest gratitude and admiration,
Bridgit.
@@bridgitkatele nice
Wawoo 🙏🏽🙏🏽
My parents are over protective on me so I Don't go out to socialised with people but am grateful for your words. Thank you
Watching this video is like my own life played right in my face. This video made me cry tears. It feels like my own life's documentary. Yeah, I am a man and introvert. Many people find me "awkward" and do things to me and get away with it and I won't say or do anything. My work life has become a burden on my life. Having to go to work everyday has become a a serious burden and draining my life. But I am working on rebuilding myself and break away from this social trap. It is possible
Yes, dear it is very possible. Just keep working on yourself ❤
Yes, it is certainly possible
Shyness is real bad
I'm dealing with it and I'll surely overcome it
Indeed it's also shrinks self esteem 😢
This lady spoke a lot about me saying it was her....
I pray I overcome it
Infact, you are talking to me here. Thanks so much for sharing this fact .
My absolute pleasure Dear!❤
I am an introvert, people hardly talk to me and felt excluded and withdrawn from their presence. One thing that kept me going is saying positive things to myself and not being concerned about what other people say about me. I had a really strict over protective parent who doesn't like me visiting friends, going out ,staying indoors etc like that. Glory be to God for praying and asking him for boldness to speak infront of crowd without fridgeting at all ,i am actually happy staying out of my comfort zone and moving to a place i will be known and recognised.
You are describing me. That's EXACTLY how shy I am. And yes, it keeps you back in life and opportunities pass you by. I am listening to you and learn how you got free from it
This is so me. At my age I'm still shy and very much introverted. Always keep to my self and like my own space but because I'm into business I'm feeling the negative side of being shy because I'm not able to put myself out there and mingle. It could be a disadvantage at it's best. I really need to break free and be social. Waiting for part 2. I really enjoy your videos. Very inspiring and educational. Thanks once again Winnie
Very instructive video. As a parent, this is a Master class❤🎉
You only see the negative aspects of your overly protective parent. Don't forget that this can help protect you from s3x predators.
Growing up as a kid, I remember being an expressive child. I could speak anywhere, my parents encouraged me so much. But I noticed that as i grew up, I became more reserved. I dunno what happened to my childhood boldness because it did not follow me into adulthood. It could be as a result of the points you raised. But one thing I know for sure is that, boldness lies in each of us and what will spring it out happens to people at different times. For me, it’s injustice or being taken for granted. I can push away my reservations and deal with it accordingly😅. For me shyness is not an absolute term, something pressing can bring you out of that comfort zone and even make you forget you were the shy type even if it’s for a minute.
The moment you said"I watched opportunities pass by me", I realized that I'm the one you are talking to
Same here
Thank you so much Ms Winnie this video is my entire life am a 16 yr old and very shy and timid cant wait to here the tips to break free crom it permanently i have been struggling with this since i knew myself ❤❤❤
It’s time to break free Dear. You can and you will do it.
Dont miss next week’s episode okay.
I love you and I am rooting for you!❤️
@@winniesschoolofelegance thank you so much this means a lot to me ❤️☺️
Sometimes, it can get frustrating when your parents always shuns your ideas and don't even make efforts to give you their own ideas
Awareness is the start of a new era
Even beyond 35yrs
@@InternationaLChefSue Shut up dawg
Wow thanks I'll get rid of my shyness 😊
Parents need to encourage their children who are shy. I do that with my daughter. She is shy too & now trying out school activities & keeps getting beta. Thanks for this. ❤❤
Very good
You re correct. I’m making my children not become me and it’s paying off. Mine is also mixed with a high dose of low self esteem 😢
I was scolded for talking a lot. As the last child, my elder siblings will always scold me for engaging in their conversations whenever they’re talking. They’ll tell me that my mates are not there so I shouldn’t get involved. This has really dealt with my communication and social life.
Yeah this is so me,I am so shy about everything.I was being scolded by my mum and Aty was always scolding for invovoling in conservation.
Yeah, exactly what happened to me, people will be telling my Mom this chat girl is too lousy and all. At the end, I was bottled up. Up till now I'm still struggling. Always alone, can't express myself, and it hurts a lot.
This is me oooo… last child of 8kids…and i know for sure it has affected me negatively in my life. I was naturally born a “gbaza queen” … however i hv grown into a shadow of someone else. I look at my second daughter… how active, bright and very sociable she is. I look at her and can tell this is a mirror of me. However, i hv become something else
As a child, It is rude to engage when adults are having a conversation.. Children ought to be trained and corrected by their elders to ensure proper upbringing.. but the elders should correct tactfully.. When I was a child my elder siblings and cousins talked a lot around me, I listened and learned without adding my voice to the conversation because they weren't talking to me.. While it is good to encourage children to be expressive it is also more important to equip them with good morals.. Children these days are morally bankrupt and engage in all sorts of vices because their parents, in ignorance and laziness, have failed to give them proper upbringing
Story of my life
Thanks so much for sharing and being a blessing! I agree with you. I can be shy at times. And it comes from my childhood, my true self being suppressed, made fun of, and or ignored by my Mom. In spite of it, I’m doing well now. Knowledge is power. Keep up the good work. ❤
My children will never suffer , with shyness .I will fight for their wellness.Our guardians could embarrass us back then
Hmm😢
Winnie thank you for being vulnerable enough to share your story. Great video. Well said, I learnt alot.
OMG I see so much of myself in you especially when you talked about how expressive you were when you were a child but grew up to be timid same here with me
You are spoken well thank you for sharing this video and your experience.
I was very shy as a child teenager and even in my young adulthood, I had to change that when I realise how much I was missing out on .
How did you do it? I am really struggling
Thanks Winnie for your encouraging words, is as if you are talking to me directly
It's my university period that hurt me the most, shy , timid but you cant intimidate me always because I'm sturbon, the difference is how i react without composure.
My last academic activity in school my project defense, i practiced and prayed a million time and after i succeeded, even lecturers were surprised cos they said they dont know i cant talk, i got A in my project defence.
They said that because of the way i was in class, they didn't atleast that i know something at all.
Same here same story ...all my presentations in school and even during Nysc were great.. that was how realized myself
I thought I was the only one who thought at a point in time that my parents weren't my real parents, the way they chastise in public eh and also several times you have to apologize to your elder ones just because they're older even though you're right with what you said.....to the point you will literally felt like your opinion is not needed on any matter just because you're the last born and the rest are way older.
This is me
There is something funny about people with these traits, they perform excellently when they want to. They don’t rush for the mic and they don’t rush to be noticed but when they decide to shine, they shine brightly. Choose your battles right.
Yu were not shy you were just scared to take the step people mistake fear for shyness their not same
YOU ARE VERY CORRECT OUR OVERLY PROTECTED PARENTS CONTRIBUTE GREATLY TO OUR SHYNESS
U have to do this on television it will help more parents
Thank You Winnie....I'm fighting mine greatly....God Bless You... everything you talked about is for me.
I used to be a very shy person, to an extend that I was afraid of people, I am fighting it greatly
You have to take it to God in prayer and repent for allowing the spirit of fear to consume you. War with words!!!! Use the word of God and fast if you need to. Shyness is a spirit an evil one and definitely not from God❤
I resonate with this, I can't look at people in the eyes. I still battle that till date
Me too..can't believe I can be scared of people
They will really take advantage of u
@@okemercy7795I am really fighting it
Wow, tears dropped from my eyes , because this was exactly my childhood , I experienced all this....
Exactly Ma'am! This is me. I'm still working on it. My parents especially dad so strict. It made me dislike him till he passed on when i was a teenager. 🤦
That description at the beginning is so me. You were really shy. I'm still working on my shyness.
Thanks for this
Most of the African countries do not have classroom presentations in the primary schools. This is one of the ways to kill shyness in its infancy.
Exactly 💯
Absolutely
Thanks for sharing. I have been there before. Thank God I have overcome that. I could even feel the pain in your voice as you shared your story. Take big HUG
Thank you!❤
I agree with you 100% for me when I was a growing kid I never played with my fellow young children my dad keeps us at home for a very long time with Jesus Christ everything is possible thanks
Wow! Watching this must be so divinely orchestrated. I was just meditating on what I've become a few days ago and I can relate to everything you said here. Some of our parents subconsciously allowed us develop this traits because that was what they knew best at the time. I am now in a developed country and I can see the difference in how children are been raised here. Thank you Winnie. I'm so glad I watched this.
Oh my God..! We are definitely alike. I’m very shy. I have a very over protective parents 😢
I totally relate with you... I'm working on my self now to break free from it.
My dad beat me a lot because I was really stubborn now I have my own child I beat him over any small tin but I really wan d best for my son , more of d time I dt like way my mom shut my son up anytime he talks 😢 , Tanx for dis video I pray I change so quickly
You have to do everything within your power to break the cycle. You can try to gradually reduce being harsh. When he annoys you, try to address the particular thing he did wrong through COMMUNICATION. You may fall back to your previous attitude but determine to stop. Think of what's at stake (you're destroying someone you love). Ask yourself if what your son just did wrong is more powerful than your love for him.
I wish you the best.
Oooo my God I feel like you are just describing everything about me that is what exactly I'm suffering from
This is so me dear
And it's killing me
I don't want it😢
Sometimes I just see people who are so bold and I wish I'm like them😢😢
It's hurt breaking
I only feel comfortable at home or within my close friends
But when I step out from them it's like hell
I feel like I'm poisoned
me too but am trying my best idont want the shy to control me
@@KellieMwanyambopls can we be friends 🙏
I feel the same way
Winnie, you are just speaking to me directly! Thank you very much dearly❤
I have phobia for crowd and I have been praying to God to help me fight it because that is one thing I hate about me can’t talk smoothly in public can’t express my self ,Winnie thank you for this video and I am patiently waiting for the next one on how u were able to fight it
You're basically an introvert
@@VictorJunior-bd3pi naaah am not
But if u can explain why u said I am introvert I might be wrong all this while thinking I am an extrovert
@@VictorJunior-bd3pi certainly not an introvert
@@VictorJunior-bd3pi but if u can give me reason why u said so I might be wrong all this while to think I am an extrovert
You know while I was listening...you said something that struck me. You said shyness can even deprive one of every opportunities that comes one's way... and also judging from your own experience, I have come to realize that is a matter of time, moreover it's just a phase of life...To be honest, I am a shy person , but I believe am gradually coming out from that shackles.
Thank you ma'am for this great impacts
You are such a wonderful and amazing person.
Some of us got it from childhood abuse from our parents. Upto today am still suffering from it.
Hi Winnie
Thanks so much for this eye opening talk..I'm taking it personal and work on it😊
I love all your outfits also, Ms. Winnie!❤️✨️🌹
Thank you!❤
I call you my role model cos that’s what you are to me. Learnt a lot from you than I did in school or any other platform. I love you. Thank you for all you do❤❤
May God bless your efforts of putting this video's altogether.
Always waiting for the Sunday upload. Much love from Sokoto ❤
Amen! 🙏🏽 I love you!❤❤
You girl oh oh oh, your 100% talking about me. Thanks for sharing and I really think that most of African parents are like that.
Thank you so much, My elegant queen
I'm even too shy to make a comment. to the point I can't really express myself and this has affected me in my career and my skill. people always commend me of how talented I am but I feel its not enough to be showcased to the public. but then I know the source of all this shyness( which is my elder brother; in as much as he's supportive, he always puts PRESSURE on me and all of that makes me really overwhelmed, being afraid of living with people. but I believe its just for a time and I'm working towards networking and socializing with humans. thank you Winnie for sharing your experience. it was a relief.
I just realized I acquired mine in boarding school...God helping me, no child of mine will be a boarding student until SS3.
Your child can go to boarding from Jss one Pat. All you do is to build self confidence in that child from home. I used to think like that before until I joined a parenting academy.
It is what you build in your child that the child will go out to display.
You're right winnie all those factors you mention are what am going through. Thank God am overcoming this monster little by little now❤❤
I had zero social exposure as a child. This has affected me badly
Same here
Same here and I'm really trying so hard to break free. I need more guidelines
All the point you mentioned are very true. I missed a lot of opportunities because of shyness.
Thank you winie am almost 47 still shy, timid, and afraid. I dnt bilive it when a promise made meby people, even By God.,,,,,,
I can really relate, everything is true here
First to comment
Thank you so much for the enlightenment
It’s my absolute pleasure!❤
I am a shy person
Winnie everything you said is right, am working towards it especially my vocabulary
Thank you the most elegant queen...... I'm here for another stage ❤ thank you so much for the educative topic 😊😊
It’s my absolute pleasure!❤
Silver or Gold I have not...but I will keep blessing you from the depth of my heart. Thanks for dropping such transformational speech. Ma God Bless You
More Grace Ma
Im still in the process of overcoming shyness, but i can say as i grow older, i got knowledge, i started loving myself and abilities, i got closer to God and its working for me😊
I also can relate my brother
Lets keep it up 👍
Listening to this and i feel this is a description of me.
Am definitely breaking free soon.
Thanks Winnie ❤
Thank you so much for this insightful video Winnie... I look forward to a video from you on your journey as a content creator ❤
This made me nearly tear up because this is literally my life. All the examples you gave about old Winnie, in functions, outside my comfort zone, in my relationship, the over protective parents
I'm really waiting for how you broke free from shyness.
One thing about I've noticed about been shy is that it literally make me belief every other person is better than me and even when i want to intentionally develop myself this thought that i will still stammer when i come to the public kills the vibe.
Please, we are waiting for the next video.
Parenting plays a huge role. What's funny is that I recently met someone who as an adult, is so shy that it affects virtually every aspect of her life but she doesn't seem to mind or be in a hurry.
This is all about me ma'am
I have tried to work on myself but still battling with it
You will overcome this in Jesus name.
Dont miss next week’s episode okay. It will give you some insight on how to tackle it.
In the meantime, start affirming to yourself “I am a very confident and bold woman, and I have the ability to express myself confidently and boldly.”
Thanks so ma'am love you
Wow, I really enjoyed your speech.
Thank you so much for sharing ❤ I feel you
Everything you said is absolutely true, I've really suffered so much for being an introvert, even finding it so difficult to socialize with people. But thank I'm breaking free already from this shackles of self-doubt, inferiority complex and lots more that comes with shyness.
Thanks Miss Winnie for sharing your story to inspire others ❤
Yes yes we thank God
"not all introverts are shy,it's their nature...
That nature is not of God, it’s of the devil!!!! The lord has not given us a timid spirit but that of Power, Love and Joy❤
Exactly 💯
Winnie may just be an introvert, not actually shy
@@invertedbeautifultimid there means fear/shy, not being an introvert. Except you're referring to someone who's both an introvert and exhibits shyness
@@IsiomaNzemekenope, what I experienced wasn’t anything related to being an introvert… it was full blown shyness!
Cos I am naturally a very expressive and open person and I am also very big on interacting with people.
I wasn’t talking about introverts in this video…
What I experienced wasn’t anything related to being an introvert… it was full blown shyness!
Cos I am naturally a very expressive, open person and I am also very big on interacting with people.
I can relate to this !! The info is so apt and I really love your video ❤ This gives me so much strength .
For real strict parenting actually affects a child's confidence you begin to lack abilities to socialize and creat bonds with your mates and become so conscious of yourself
Yeah I can relate
Things am facing right now
It's very hard for me to make friends
Perfectly said
I'm not an adult, but I'm watching this. I am so glad .Thank you ma😊❤
Thanks so much for sharing this, it’s as though u can read me through & through, very conversational and bold around my own people but will rather be by myself outside my comfort zone & avoid social functions
Waw,, ❤
Sincerely you have totally understand and define me, and this altitude really holds me back, OMG.🤦 Thank you so much 🥰