Your Mom's House Podcast - Ep. 584
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- Опубликовано: 29 дек 2020
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What up YMH Fam??? It's been a crazy month in a crazy year, but we have a miracle: Tom Segura is back in studio! Where's Christina? Tom will update you on EVERYTHING. We know we have new fans that absolutely loved TopDog from the live show, so we decided to walk you through some of the all time best calls with Tom's dad in recorded podcast history... warning, lots of brown talk ahead!
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Tom Talks was great, but I can’t wait for the next podcast spinoff: Tom Walks
Thanks for the laugh!
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾😂😂😂
@@LeroyFurious hey black hands is cultural appropriations. Plz stop 🛑
Or maybe Tom wanks is next
@@funnydonor9484 Yet, they resemble my real ones...
Didn't think Tom would go to rehab before Bert.
Holy fuck my sides
Beat me to it dude!!!😀
In fairness though, I think you'll find Bart in an alley wearing fingerless gloves and a stained trenchcoat, standing over a barrel of fire and asking if he can give you handy for a fifth of titos before you'll find him at his first stint in rehab. Unfortunately, all the traumatized dogs he'll leave in his wake on the way there is the worst part.
😂😂😂😂😂😂
Burnt would rather die than go to rehab
Rest In Peace Top Dog, going to miss the hilarious stories. Best wishes Tim and Christine
Tom's relationship with his dad is amazing, the way Top Dog talks to Tom you can hear how much he loves him "hey buddy". Never grew up with a dad, but this is dad/son goals!
You can tell in his voice how excited he is to here from tom. I love how he says when he is down all has to do is think about moments spent with tom. Gold
Tina is fine. She is just trying to get stolen injury/sickness valor.
Oh shit, you're probably right. Damn it Tina!
They*
*Tine
Tina: "Oh yah! You've got covid?! Well III-IIii have covid!! (stealing valor into the New Year)
Zim Zer*
Christine above 18 couldn't do the pomcast because she's on her date with The King.
@Bilbo Baggins hey Hitler
@Bilbo Baggins Gang boi.
Cheeseburger!
King’s gonna motor those sloppers like his truck.
The king would have taken care of christine and not given her covid.
"To cheer myself up I just have to think of all the childhood experiences with you."
*Tom instantly moves on and ridicules his father*
It's so sweet. I wish my dad gave half as much of a shit about me as TopDog does about Tom.
*Sociopath vibes*
“I’m an environmentalist” when referring to turning poopy underwear inside out for an extra wear. That’s some Bert level thinking and I love it!
Everything on Tom's left stopped working, including Kristine
Has she ever “worked” really? I mean, Tom’s scrum remains uneaten after all these years
@@mrdavidmillz yeah man she was working that new beej technique from LeeAnn up until Tom broke his body like Buzz Lightyear
May Krustine Patitsky rest in peace
Severely underrated comment
Now that Tim is back, it’s good to see the fear in Nadiv’s eyes again.
Haahahahahaha
Best comment so far
I couldn't stand him acting all cool with main Mommy Christine. Good thing Tip is back to keep that redhead malakh-adam hybrid in his place.
Damn jew boy
@@riukrobu Yessss! He was too cavalier. He just needs to do his laugh and STFU.
I don’t think a lot of people appreciate how despite whatever’s going on, in the 7 years I’ve listened, they’ve never missed a week of the podcast. Tim broke half his body and they both got covid, but they never missed an episode.
When did they both get covid?
Ida b Tod said at the beggining of this podcast that he got it rigt after his accident and Kristen got it after him
Its talking. No biggie
Maybe they should take a break.
@@Mark-jr6ld it's their main source of income. I doubt they would want to not make money
I have never heard anyone speak about such horrifying "I shit myself" stories with such nonchalant candor as Tom's dad. The fact that this followed up Tom talking about what could arguably be the most humbling experience of someone's life, well, that hit in just the right spot. Thanks Jeans.
Tom sacrified his body so his friend Bernt could start to take care of his health. That’s the real Christmas miracle
Even though Tom surely didn't PLAN to injure himself to trigger Bert to get checkups, it's a nice silver lining on this whole thing.
Amen
I'm sure this whole thing WAS put together to get Bernt Chrysler to listen to his doctors.
The lord works in mysterious ways
a real blessings in the sky's
Top dog needs to be a special guest soon that would be best of all time
Why he wasn't the guest co-host is confusing to me.
@@joejefferies11 bc he lives in Florida?
Ya buddy.
He was on the first live show.
He was on the first live show they did.
RIP Top Dog, him saying he tells himself jokes just to make himself laugh had me laughing out loud. What a legend.
Still makes me sad when Tom doesnt acknowledge that Top Dog says his favorite thing to do is think of his memories with him when he was a kid.
I mean, ive gotten zero shit my pants story from my dad. Seems like tom and his dad have a great relationship, tom probably just wanted to keep the show moving.
i know! it’s quite possibly the cutest shit of all time
Hey Buddy!
That was such a nice thing to think on top dogs part, considering there’s no greater feeling than killing the enemy buddy
Dude it made me sad as fuck hearing Tom poking at his dad trying to get him to talk about killing people .. like come on man, you're really gonna ask him that on the podcast? That must have been way better in Tom's head than it played out
One of my most regular mistakes I do in life is that I decide YMH is the perfect show to sit down and have a meal to...
Having an apple and a coffee with the shit stories right now lol
Saaaame
Very relatable comment
And listen in public without headphones
I actually threw up during this episode 👍
I swear the way top dog sounds excited to talk to Tom makes me happy. ''HEY BUDDY"
Top dog is such a character. I have a hard time believing he’s even a real person lmfao. The way he loves his blonde jokes and just laughs and laughs
I am genuinely glad everyone is ok and that Tom is recovering
Top Dog’s shit stories are like Coco’s drug stories
“Bouldah, Colorado. ‘76”
I love the accuracy
“Actually I’m lyin’ to ya, it was ‘86 because I remember...Joe Rogan, get this - I had to go pawn these dentures I snagged off a hookah’, but across the street? Ya know what were they were showing? Muhthafuckin’ Top Gun! That’s fuckin’ right! Who’s better than me dawg”
Read that in his voice 😂
Lyke a fukn Doctah!
lol suka la mink
All this just to get a sympathy scrum eating from Christina.
did you say 'just'?
If she would of ate the scrum she would of built anti bodies
@@wzrdfrskn832 it was just
She's actually under the desk the entire ep
The covid spikes give extra sensation like those over engineered condoms with the bumps
"I think its hilarious. Can you imagine"
After the second time I'm in tears
RIP to the OG Top Dog! Always made my day brighter love that man
Na-dav is trem-bl-ing, mommy's back home
Tim instills the fear of God in that little ginger Jewish boy. I love it 💞
New verse - I love it
I read this in the google song
SUWOOOO
Thank you. I shall be humming this all day🤣
Tom would have stronger bones if he drank more kool aid
Yeah... AND if he bathed in a pool.
I'm betting the real recipe is lots of Tito's and one unknown dose of whatever Ari gives you without your consent
A comedian breaks his humerus, that can’t be a good sign.
Top Dog's - "Heeeyy Buddy!" brings me SO much joy!!!
1:06:00 Christina's reaction to when top dog says "Dumb broad" is my fave.
Timestamp pleeease.
@@telephantasm4070 1:06:00
@@Nood259 Thanks!
toms dad doesnt give a flying F lmao
Thank God Tom's back in studio.
That J was getting a little too comfortable in his absence!
I just googled top dog. I didn’t know he was a leukemia survivor. Bless him.
Much love to Tommy, Tina, and Charo during this time. Top Dog gave us so many laughs through the years. RIP Top Dog.
Tom talking about the nerve regrowth range: "yeah, ummm, he was between 5'2" & 6'8." Lmao
He had ears too
..."That's the fucking description?"
“You were just a little kid, three”.....
”seven”
SEVEN!?
I was thinking that before he even said it 😅
1-900-top-dawg needs to be a thing! I would gladly pay $3.99/min to just talk to him about anything. I really want to hear his take on aluminum siding.
All Top Dogs to go heaven ☁️ 🌈 🐕 You’re gonna be so glad to come back and watch this episode. He always made us laugh, and he will be dearly missed by thousands
Christina is there. She's just eating Tim's scrum under the desk the entire ep
The Topdog tapes sound like we’re watching back old interrogation tapes
Rest in peace Top Dog. Keep feathering it in heaven, rest in proto, and touch my camera through the Pearly Gates
Tomception. There is broken Tom, Tom with Christina p and Tom on the phone with Top Dog. Three levels of Tom
It gets better: who do you think Tom is named after?
The way big dogs voice drops when he is asked about killing the enemy, makes me want to give him a hug.
When top dog wont stop answering jokes had me crying laughing almost crashing my car
Man nothing makes me happier than hearing Top Dog say “Hey Buddy!” when he answers the phone. What a legend.
What’s more impressive... Brent hitting his 1,000th mile or Top Dog hitting his 100,000th shit.... let’s be real
I refuse to believe Brent is running miles. I can see him running two blocks and calling it two miles. That seems much more like Brent
@@X7Maverick Lmao! Exactly!
@@X7Maverick if he didn't post screencaps from his watch/ apps I wouldn't believe it.
@@X7Maverick I refuse to believe he actually hit 1,000 🤣 top dog hitting 100k shots tho... I can see it
This is older Tom reacting to younger Tom reacting to basically future Tom. Someone call Christopher Nolan or Tarantino. This shits gold.
In the words of Tom’s EMT “You out here playing with kids, man.”
The Top Dog blonde joke part had me crying. Thank you.
At first I was sure about Tom talking about his injuries but then a friend of mine said something that made all kinds of sense to me. She said think of it as a conversation. I like that!
i'm 6 years in to nerve damage in my left leg and arm.
nerves "grow back" 1mm a day a doctor told me while i was in recovery.
things get better but they will never be perfect again.
meds help, stay off the oxy and get something like gabapentin.
try it out.
good luck mommy.
Keep feathering it
Call me a tik tok its ok but i thought gabapentin was a antianxiety med? 😂
@@austynkoranda3867 it is prescribed to people with anxiety but its actually an anticonvulsant/nerve pain meds.
thats why he was very specific in his terms, his nerve wasnt by a technical definition "damaged" and was never severed
Gabs are for people with fibromyalgia, it’s for nerve pain. Lyrica is actually the stronger version, tim may be better off with that- it helps me a lot. It’s still controlled substance, but much better than opiates. Good luck timmy bunz
I feel like I am in Inception. Its Tom, listening to Tom, listen to Tom, talk to his dad.
"I wash my hands if other people are in the restroom cause I want them to think I'm...ya know, civilized."-Top Dog
"Do you want to run the update?" "tomorrow." haha yep
Garth Brookes has my family in his shed. Someone please help.
Call The machine, he'd break Garth in half
I love that top dog laughs at the blonde jokes as if they’re true stories
Just watching tom's eyes has been a whole learning experience,goddamn there's so much pain in them.
He looks exhausted
He clearly wasn’t following proto while playing hoops.
He should have stretched first
He tried to go full throttle 😂
When you’re featherin it brother
He nearly lost his life!...
..as far as his job goes
@@Courier_Seven his kicked his own ass
"A lot of tears. Crying a lot"
I only laugh at people getting hurt like Tom does... When it's Tom.
Big tears. Big tears.
Opioids mess with your emotional control
In any other pomcast under any other circumstances, I might skip a "best hits" episode, but I loved this. I'm just so happy Tim is back, listening to these bits is pure nostalgia and a perfect way to wrap up the shitshow that was 2020 - by remembering good times and having T-buns and Nadiv react to them. Plus, a lot of newer listeners probably haven't heard some of the older YMH classics like the Orlando Airport story. Welcome back mommy Todd and Happy New Years, Mommies! Get well soon Tanner and Kirsten!
Wtf is a pomcast
I totally agree, i still think about some of my all time favorite clips sometimes lol
Top Dog is really giving me some Ed Asner energy.
Tom's dad sounds exactly like Tom when he's laughing hysterically.
This reminds me of when sitcoms in the 90s used to do entire episodes that were dedicated to showing highlight clips between really short new segments.
Listening to Tom’s dad laugh at those blonde jokes is hilarious 😂
Happy New Years to the whole YMHs thank you for making quarantine a lot easier and all the live shows were so epic. Hoping for a speedy recovery! Love you all!!
Would love to see the guy in Taiwan watch Tom's injury video.
4:19 toms listening to his dads shit story, then gets grossed out by Christinas archived fart 🤣
tim texting during the clips is such a senior slide move and I love it
Between his mom and his dad, you can see how he developed such an incredibly gifted insight towards the sense of humor in life and its comedy, no matter how tragic. Even if genes didn’t play a role, you can tell…from his mom, he got a master class in the nonsensical and absurdity. His father, great storytelling. Most importantly though was both were just as self-aware of each and every weakness and unapologetic moments of depravity, that confidence was instilled and passed down to little Tommy and made him what we are blessed with now 😊
Lol did we just watch Christina give dr Drew Covid in real time on last week's episode?
He got it from a Christmas party and probably gave it to her
Thats classic dr drew
💯%
Drew has been denying it is an issue. I think Drew gave it to Christy (and now maybe Brett)
He's a Drewperspreader.
Tom’s dad is funny as fuck and didn’t realize how similar Tom sounds and laughs like him this episode was great!
Hearing Tom’s dad enjoy those blonde jokes gave me pure joy
RIP Top Dog. Nothing beats the "Heyyy Buddy!" He always had primed and ready for tommy buns
Tom when will you address Bert turning you’re body into dust by his sheer charisma, and manliness ?
Did anyone else notice the measuring tape next to Nadav? While I'd like to think it has something to do with Studio Jeans, Nadav is looking just a little too smug this episode, like he won a measuring contest.
The content of this episode couldn’t come at a better time. I just lost my dad a couple weeks ago due to COVID-19 complications, and he was known in our family for shit and fart stories. This reminds me of him so much. At the same time it reminds me of him, this video brings me joy because I feel like I’m hearing my dad tell his stories. Thank you, YMH. ❤️
RIP Top Dog, too pure for this world. Keep featherin’ it in heaven.
I wish that in the future I could watch Toms kids talk about him in the way he talks about Top Dawg
I need more of Top Dog hearing and telling Blonde Jokes. Pure joy.
Tom gets his comedic timing from Top Dog. 100 percent.
As a 32 year old father of 2, I've never felt like more of a dad than after listening to Top Dog.
Tom just high on painkillers going over the oldies.
The actual title of the podcast
Gone off a perc
The look on Christines face as Tom’s dad tells Polish and blonde jokes is the best.
I turned my phone brightness down and Toms hoodie started looking like long hair coming down and it is hilarious
Thank you Jeans for the replay of the old Top Dog phone calls! I really needed that laugh today.
So you got covid FROM the hospital? That makes too much sense.
Well yeah. Comparatively there are a lot of people there with covid...
Hospital is the best place to catch diseases, it's literally full of sick people..
I was in the hospital just last week and when I was in my little cubicle waiting around I heard the lady next to me get diagnosed with covid. Now that was terrifying for me lol
As a hospital employee, nosocomial infections are ridiculously common.
Look up Hospital-acquired pneumonia. I had to get a pneumonia booster when I was in for an extended period in 2018 just in case.
Tim takin’ “a walk” down memory lane. Too soon?
"How do you drown a blond?"
"You know, have her stand in the shower for a long time." 💀💀💀
1:04:00
RIP Tog Dog. Hope you are laughing at the great blonde jokes in the sky.
Hologram technology is awesome now, this really looks like Tom is still with us! Rest In Proto buddy, still can't believe Bert wasn't the one to go first!
Omg top dog doing the math of how many shits he’s had this far in life had me crying 🤣
"dumb broad can you imagine I mean how dumb can you get". Lmao top dog laughing at his own jokes is so adorable. Hard to believe this man enjoyed killing the enemy
Rest in Proto Top Dog ❤️👖❤️
What a season finale for 2020 huh. Glad you’re ok Tom
The episode is lowkey Tom realizing how much he loves everyone, ChrisJeansA the most. 💙
Dawg why on Earth do they not have Tom's dad on more often??? This guy is amazing LOLL
I just realized TopDog might be fully R-worded. Must have been that lead in the water and the paint.
I'm convinced Tom wasn't in this episode and they looped footage of him sitting there like in Speed.
"The gang does a clip show"
i love that episode
Your dad’s voice sounds like Heath Ledger’s Joker haha
I am crying at Top Dogs blonde jokes 🤣😭😭
I got a new 4K monitor for Christmas just for this upcoming live show. Talk about excited