yeah no one is saying this but THATS the key here! Once they are old enough to consider hair style part of their identity it's no longer your choice. But this i have no problem with at all!
I wish my mom cut my hair even up 7, my hair tangled so easy back and I hated getting my hair combed and she would brush it so violently. In our family photo when I was four I had what she called a rats nest and I remember being scolded for not brushing it beforehand. But she always had this dream of me having long flowing hair and that just wasn’t reality till I was 16. Like I feel until the kid says they want longer or different hair, doing something that makes hygiene easier is fine and it doesn’t have to be an ugly hair cut either
@@calliemyersbuchanan6458 I was complete reverse of this whole thing and always had long hair and always liked my long hair. My Mom said she was gonna trim it once when I was about 5 and cut off only 2 or 3 inches and I lost my 💩. I started screaming and crying about how she cut off my hair. She never cut off my hair again. Took me a good 30 years to be convinced to go to a salon to have my hair "trimmed". Still didn't like it. I've learned layering is better instead of just cutting across, so I later my hair at home myself. I was born with hair and have always had hair.
I don’t see how it “saved” her. An older child should be brushing their own hair and would be far worse leaving them looking dishevelled, just so people won’t think you’re mean, for not brushing an older child’s hair.
same here, until I was 9 i had never gotten a real haircut, just my mom chopping off the last inch once a year and i could only wear platts and also my hair was quite heavy. Cut my hair at school after sticking a chewing gum in it as a reason for cutting it off. I was disciplined for that and 10+ years later my parents totally forgot about how they controlled my hair length.
Um. Same. In fact. She asked me to cut her hair off because the payoff of “cute hair” didn’t balance with the “ouch this sucks” of the actual action of doing her hair FOR HER. She weighed the cost vs payoff and decided “it’s a bob for me thanks” AT FIVE YEARS OLD… I said “same babe” and chopped mine too. And as our hair grows out, we will both be reassessing the situation together. Separately but together. Because… same babe. ❤
I had gorgeous long hair as a kid but refused to take care of it. Mom says "that's enough, you have to get it cut." We go to a salon (someplace inexpensive), I'm allowed to pick out ANY hairstyle that I want that is shoulder length or above. We spent a week looking through catalogs and magazines and the Internet- something I'd like. Something I chose myself with my mom's help. So while yes I was forced to cut my hair, it wasn't a traumatizing experience, and I kept my hair in a buzzed pixie cut or undercut for many years after that because of how much I loved my short hair. Now that I CAN and know HOW to take care of my hair, I really do love having it long though. Honestly I barely think about the incident unless something prompts it because it was so inconsequential and didn't have any long term side effects. Love my mom.
@@jeanniemccain3045 this was how my first short cut happened too, with the addition of an older sister and gum. My sister and I are 3 years apart, but everyone thought we were twins, so one day when I dozed off in the car (probably 5-6 years old) she smashed gum in my hair to the point taking out a huge chunk was the only option. I ended up loving it
My (now adult) daughter loved her long hair because she loved wearing it in Baby Spice ponytails. However, her school started sending home regular alerts that students had been found to have lice, and she ended up with them a few times. We both hated the shampoo, which left her hair so knotted and tangled that it took forever to comb them all out. Then, after that there were the 2-3 hours we spent with me sitting on the sofa, while she sat on a small chair in front of me, while I meticulously went through her hair with the lice comb and my fingers, looking for eggs. We hated the whole thing, especially since I was so diligent, and made sure she was lice/egg free when she went back to school, only for her to have them again a week or 2 later because other parents weren't so diligent. This was a painful process for her to go through, so I finally told her that she was going to have to get her hair cut. I told her that, unfortunately, it couldn't stop her from getting lice again, but if she did, short hair would make it much easier for me to go through her hair, and there would be much less hair to get tangled after shampooing...it would be much less painful for her. She was understandably upset, but we made it a decision she had a say in. We went through pictures of short haircuts, and I let her choose her new hairstyle. The more time we spent looking at styles, the more excited she got about getting her hair cut. When she realized that I wasn't planning on taking her to a barber and getting her a crewcut, and that a short style could still be girly (and she was very girly at that age), and could still accommodate the barrettes and hairbands she loved, she was totally onboard. I made the day of her haircut a girls' day out, getting her nails painted with cute little ladybugs, shopping for a couple new outfits, and lunch at a "fancy" restaurant. I explained the situation to the hair stylist, and he was fantastic. He treated her like a princess, and showed her various ways that she could wear her hair, and how she could wear her favourite accessories. He truly made it feel like a special occassion for her that she was fully involved in, instead of something that was being done to her. When her hair started growing out, she came to me and asked if she could get it cut again. We ended up going back to that same stylist for years, until he left to work in another city. She's 30 now, and has worn her hair short ever since. She's tried a couple times to grow it out, but realises that she really does look better with short hair, and because her hair is very fine, she's actually able to do more with it when it's short.
@@Kalani_Saiko Always!! And of course, they were the kids with the long hair. You knew who the diligent parents were because at around the same time, a whole bunch of girls were getting their hair cut short.
My mother used to say “you’re under my roof. And as long as you are, you can’t cut your hair.” My grandmother gave me a pixie haircut when I was 16 since I was living with her, and my mother was no longer in charge. My mother hated it. One of the best days of my life. Now 30, and I still use my hair as a symbol of my rebellion and freedom.
I feel this!! I used to beg my mum to let me cut my long hair beyond just getting a trim but it was always “I’m not going to have everyone blame me for my daughter looking like a boy”. once I turned 18 one of the first things I did was get my hair cut and the compliments came rolling in because surprise! When you have some control over your appearance you’re going to put more effort into it! Now that everyone loves my short hair she likes to act like we couldn’t get it cut short because we were poor lol
I was able to cut my hair but under no circumstances was I able to color my hair until I was 14 years of age. I’m 20 now and I just now went back to my natural hair color with blonde underneath and money pieces. That’s 6 years I hated my natural hair for. I’m grateful that she didn’t let me color it or do anything completely drastic but I think she should’ve let me color it alittle for some freedom cause i almost fried my hair dying it so much
Hi I'm 18, I haven't had my hair short since I was 5 and just wanted to ask what was your mom's excuse for not letting you cut it? My Dad won't let me cut anything more than my tips, and while I don't mind it it does bother me because I live in tropical weather and have curly/wavy hair. You don't have to answer, but I I like seeing a comment I could relate to 😊
@@PinkeerbaBa-dd3sqI get what you're saying, and agree. But at least in this video, she was only 2. At that age, they're not really going to have an opinion about how it looks anyway, at tjat age it just doesn't matter to them. I'm glad you and your siblings got some peace eventually with that issue.
@@PinkeerbaBa-dd3sq someone that young being emotionally affected isn’t great I agree, but even if they do get upset somebody that age would probs be over it in 20 mins time so I wouldn’t worry
I actually really needed to hear that part at the end where you say “we teach our kids lots of things, but it doesn’t have to be all at once.” I think I’m extremely stressed out because it made me cry… subscribed
Take a moment, grab a coffee/tea/drink of choice, take a deep breath, and remind yourself that *you are a good parent* . This random person on the internet knows you're a good parent *because* you're worried about ensuring that you teach your child everything they need to know. It means you care. You have those special things that make a good parent - love and a desire to do right by your child. Everything will fall into place after that. And ignore Instagram "parenting influencers" - it's all just curated BS, none of it's real. Gwenna (Momma Cusses) has the right idea - go at the pace that's right for you and your child, accept that perfection is unrealistic, and do your best. So long as you're both happy and healthy then you're doing a great job. Other people's unrealistic depictions of perfection are harmful and can shove it 😉 Hang in there - you've got this 💖
I'm not a parent (nor do I ever want to be one) but I absolutely love watching this woman's takes on parenting and teaching kids things. It's refreshing and oddly motivating for someone like me who doesn't have any desire to be around kids. I love and respect her videos so much.
I love this! Working in childcare we had a toddler who came in with a bob and then a pixie cut because she hated having her hair in her face. She adored her short hair
Definitely not abuse, idk anybody who would say otherwise. She's not harming her daughter, hell, I'd say she's even helping her daughter because the daughter couldn't tolerate her hair being brushed for a long time so they had it cut so that she could have a better time + less time needed to brush her hair.
Abuse is like beating… Cutting someone’s hair is not abuse please 😭😭 Edit: 🥲 (It is abuse I just was lazy to research so I practically assumed, because I saw some comments saying that cutting someone’s hair was not abuse so I just believe them 😭) People in the comments are pretty calm about it so I am really not sure if it’s really “abuse”.
@@mellon_c0llie1 Actually they might be talking about the beating type of abuse. There is absolutely no abuse that does cutting hairs as abuse (probably). Cutting someone's hair is an assault. It is illegal to cut someone's hair without their consent. I also were talking about the abuse they might be talking about like beating. (Anyways I was just being random checking comments and sometimes correcting them.) I was also in a rush when I was commenting for no reason so I didn't say it very formally.
When I was four or five, I was so sick of my hair needing to be brushed that I cut it myself and my mom was so mad she beat me. I wish I had a mom like you
my little brother has been cutting his hair off himself for years. our parents do everything they can to stop him and force him to grow it out, but the moment he's out of sight, he finds a pair of scissors and cuts it. it makes them so furious that they can't just magically grow it back out. i'm sorry your mom treated you like that. your body does not belong to her and never, ever did
I've got three girls and I tell them every time they complain about me brushing their hair, "If you don't like it so much then we can cut it short, but if we don't brush it it will become dirty and matted and unhygienic." Two kept it long, one learned how to brush her own hair and one hated it so much we cut it short, all three of them are still happy with their choices a year later. 🤷♀️
I teach that to my tots too. I let them watch TV, have the iPad, and I have a special toy stowed away for power outages while I brush their hair. They are free to cut their hair whenever they want to or we make fun by distracting them.
try detangling it damp with conditioner in, with a comb starting from the ends working up to the head. also, you can take them to a salon and ask for it to be thinned, that helps a lot especially if they have thick hair
3 kids, 2 kept it long, one brushes her own and one cut it off. 3 = 4?😂 I find most hair brushing struggles come from using the wrong brush. Get a really gentle brush like a tangle teezer, if it feels like it's slipping over the knots then that's perfect. Split the hair in 4 sections to make the process of brushing faster, regular trims and layers help a lot and a good deep conditioning. Fine hair is best brushed dry after washing. Thick or curly hair is best brushed wet with conditioner in.
@jadevt1939 three daughters, A, B and C, two kept it long, one cut it. A= let's the commenter brush her long hair. B= brushes her long hair. C= cut her hair. I think that is what they wrote, two long-haired children, one of them brushes it on their own.
My mom did not let scissors touch my hair until I was 12 and spent every moment before that royally pissed that my hair was knotted, tangled and I hated having it brushed and styled. Letting kids choose how they want to look and to have bodily autonomy is important, but I can promise you it's not achieved by spending any amount of time fighting and crying about hair every day.
Did any of you also have tbe phase where as soon as you moved out you did EVERYTHING to your hair? My mom never let me touch anything for myself so as soon as I left I dyed it purple and got a side shave lol. I like dying it still but the side shave was too much upkeep for me
@@thebigmystery7841 yes. The aforementioned haircut at twelve saw me go from hair past my butt to what the kids are now calling the wolf cut up to my chin. I've had bleach blonde pixies and bobs, long brunette layers, red Bettie Page bangs, and something that resembled Marilyn Monroe's hair but with pink streaks. Now I'm back to waist length natural hair because I say I'm entering my hippie arc, but the truth is I don't have the patience for the upkeep anymore and just plaster my face with all the smokey eyeshadow and moody lipstick I also wasn't allowed to wear. 😂
Honestly is kinda what my mom did for me and I am really thankful she did. I have insanely thick hair, hated having her brush/wash it, and she didn't have the time or energy to fight me over it so I had a bowl cut for years. The trade off, she told me, is that once I learned how to take care of my own hair that I could pick whatever hairstyle I wanted, and she was true to her word. I eventually got sick of the bowl cut, actively learned how to wash and brush my own hair, and she let me do what I wanted from that day forward.
Mine was the same but toxic and I enjoyed getting my hair done. I just didn't know how to take care of it and all she would tell me is "brush from the bottom up" and I'd do it, and then she would tell me I'm doing it wrong. Then my dad cut it off with paper scissors. If it had been done with consideration, yes, great tactic. It was not. I'm glad it was done gently with you. I still brush my hair "the wrong way" as an adult according to my mom and she can't even brush my hair anymore without it being painful and making knots. Haven't met anyone in my adult life that can do it gently. (It takes fucking time). I don't have coarse kinky hair. It's loose waves at best that go away once combed or brushed.
Sounds like my mom..she chopped my hair off..my hair was long and straight but she let my YOUNGER sister with long blond curly hair keep her hair..I don’t know about as a child but as an adult I DO NOT have a sensitive scalp but my sister can’t stand her scalp touched and has never had her hair cut..I think it sound like mom just didn’t like my hair as well as she did my sisters!
As a hairstylist I approve of this. Even before I was a mom I always said "if ya want long hair then you need to take care of it yourself OR be able to handle having someone do it for you." My kid tried to grow her hair out in kindergarten and I supported her, but when brushing became a fight I calmly explained that it would be easier with shorter hair and eventually she asked for a bob. Thankfully she was old enough to reason with. At two I just gave her haircuts whenever it became tangled and she never said anything about it 🤷♀️
Ohhhh, I feel this. My mom decided to chop my hair off in third grade, without my consent. And no, she did not have the skills needed to do it correctly.
I have photos my parents had done of me when I was two and my mom decided to cut my bangs herself beforehand. I had kind of a very short poofy bob, with overly short bangs. It looked like my mom had cut the front out of a stemless pumpkin and stuck it on my head. That was back in 1968. So sad.
When I was little, I hated having my super long hair brushed and styled. I was super tender headed and it hurt. I wish my mom would have done that or made me aware of the option. She did her best but it was a long time ago and long hair on little girls seemed like the only option in my world. Good on you for making it easier on her and facilitating her comfort and later on, her choice.
Same, my scalp is really sensitive now because of how hard my mom used to brush my hair, now whenever I have to brush my hair it hurts. It also didn't help that my hair was very curly and my mom didn't know how to handle it, she wouldn't even use products for curly hair and let my hair grow down to waist lenght
I've always had really fine hair that tangles sooo easily. My nan would brush from the top down, tangling any knots and tugging on my scalp to the point I'd try and brush my own hair to avoid the pain which would have me in tears on a daily basis. Unfortunately I was also brushing top down so wasn't very good, resulting in a more painful brushing session from her. Worst thing that happened was I got nits around age 6, I got a buzz cut cos she didn't want to deal with me crying if she did the treatment, I was devastated and still can't forgive her for that because it was done out of her ignorance and laziness. If I remember correctly my brother and I had matching hair cuts for a while and my older sister got to keep her easy to manage Goldilocks curls and even though other girls got nits too they also didn't get so much as a trim so my hair really stood out... Not a happy camper. Though in this case the child is too young to care or remember, when they get older I know she will discuss options and repercussions of hair care, cos she's a good parent.
Me and my sister were capable of growing waist length hair and everyone kept telling our mom not to cut it. IT WAS AWFUL (and we have a lot of thick curly coily hair), 2 tender headed babies and a heavy handed mama... nooope. Now as an adult me and my sister both keep our SHORT. Like at one point I SHAVED MY HEAD because no... too much hair.
Totally agree. The whole idea of making them suffer unnecessarily is almost never actually teaching them a lesson. It’s a power trip. My wife begged for years for her mom to let her cut her hair because it was tangled and gave her headaches but her mom dug her heels in and refused because “short hair is hideous, you don’t want to be ugly, you want to be pretty.” Sometimes enduring hard things is necessary for building character and learning how to do life, but like you said, not at 2. You don’t get a badge of honor for enduring something for the sake of suffering.
my 6 1/2 recently had her first haircut, because she didn't want to brush it. it's shoulder length so not short short but it's definitely made a huge difference in how knotty it gets and how fast. the first two days after her haircut she honestly brushed her hair all day 😂 she was like "wow, this is so easy, I'm never letting my hair get long ever again" in fact I look up from typing this and she's brushing it right now
God that’s adorable. I have a 2.5 year old boy and his hair GREW but he was bald on the sides so he literally genetically grew a mullet for the first year and a half of his life for no reason 😂😂😂 it’s all in now but I remember his first haircut he was running his hands all over his head giggling, he does that for the first few days after every haircut now 😂
My parents took the route of "if you want long hair you have to take care of it yourself" and then didn't let me cut my hair. Cue me going to school with greasy matted waist-length hair because I was 6 and was never taught how to take care of it. I'm glad you made a choice that helped both you and your kiddo.
Wow.. im actually sorry for you due to this, it screams a little bit of neglection for me.. how is the relation between you and your parents today, if you dont mind me asking?
@@zannadunstrand6289 Very strained. I'm going to cut contact as soon as possible. This was one of the least bad things tbh. There was a lot wrong in my childhood.
When I was a kid my parents used to have to trap me in between their legs to brush my hair. I always asked for shorter hair. Even as a grew up a hated having long hair. As a teen while my parents wouldn’t ‘forbid’ me from cutting my hair shorter they would always talk in out of it and say I’d look bad with short hair. It’s created this feeling of hating having long hair but so feeling like I have no other choice because I would look ugly otherwise.
that’s so awful i’m so sorry. ik it means little i’m sure but your look amazing with short hair. there’s so many different ways to style it, so if you haven’t already, i’d say go for it. it’ll be so different and weird but in a good way!!
As someone who's been wanting to get short hair for years, I understand. My hair goes halfway down my back now and I wish I could make it so much shorter, but my mum (who cuts my hair because woo free haircuts) says only medium hair would be good for me
I feel you - I still look at a comb the wrong way and have a massive 15min tangle. I did get a shorter hairdo, still do... I highly recommend shorter hairstyles - it makes everything easier, but going from waist length to men's military is way too much. If you want my opinion - cut it to the length you wouldn't notice much e.g. waist to chest, to half chest, quarter chest, shoulder, to half neck. Hair grows back, but getting back to your original length, if you don't like it, can be a 3month wait or a 3year wait, and if you just trim the ends, there's no difference. And hair extensions are a hassle, but perfect for special occasions (1-2x per year). Best of luck 🤞
My mom did this! Friends and family were so mad but you know what? It helped both me and her so much. I hated her for brushing my hair 😂 instead of starting our day with a huge fight we could start it calmly and lovingly. Awesome parenting mama! 🤍 As always, thank you for sharing your world with us!
My mom did it too. I had lots of straight-ish hair as a little one and my mom kept it at a bob (with bangs) for the longest time just so that it would be out of my face with minimal effort. My hair is still thick and straight-ish, but now that I'm able to take care of my hair the way I want, I can wear it the way I want. Can confirm, my childhood had much less screaming. And now I also know how to pick battles with my little girls and their hair.
That was literally me and my mother! Except I refused to let her cut it or even trim. She just stopped helping me and I stopped brushing my hair. After she helped me untangle the rat's nest I had grown on my head, I finally learned to brush my own hair.
I also did this to my daughter. She twisted her pointer finger into her hair to sooth herself, so she always woke up with a head full of knots every morning. One night she woke up screaming: her finger got stuck in her hair and had already turned blue. Next day: hair off, problem solved.
😭 I really needed this. I’m considering cutting my daughters hair and I’ve been internally struggling because I feel inadequate as a mom because i wasn’t able to keep up with her hair. This has given me the confidence to just do it. Everyone will be happier
My mom’s blind and would use a fine comb on my hair (paying the price for that today) and always cut the hell out of my ears with it. Cutting my hair so she stopped was the best thing for all of us.
We had a rule that you can have long hair as long as you are willing to take care of it. My daughter has beautiful blonde curly hair that she hated getting brushed. So, at about two we got her "Shirley Temple curls" which are super short and moved on. She became much more confident in her hair - since it was no longer a source of pain. Go for it!
That's what my parents did with my sister. Her hair was very fine and even into her teens she wouldn't take care of it. Now she's 22 and has hair to her waist that she dyes, conditions, and braids.
Same here. I watch all sorts of parenting contenting from various creators because I want to be the best parent I can be if and when we get there. Also for interacting with kids in general. You don't have to be a parent to be a gentle caretaker. Whether that's a teacher, an aunt or uncle, a babysitter, a nanny, etc. I just want the kiddos around me to know that I'm a safe person for them.
I’m here happily and I have no desire or plan to EVER have a kid. She’s funny and a lovely person to help restore my faith in humanity. And obviously I gladly share her with anyone who does have/wants children. Plus, some of her stuff is just as helpful with adults as with children 😂
I watch bc I have a niece who lives w me and this woman reminds me very well I need to be patient with the kid even when she's throwin tantrums like softballs💀
I don't have kids but I work at a daycare and I take mental notes from her to better interact with the kids in a way that's healthy for both me and them.
My mom had a similar rule when I was younger. I was really sensitive to hair brushing when I was younger so she would say, “either brush your hair or cut it.” And I always chose cut. It was fine. She never forced me to cut it, but it was easier for me and for her.
Noticing in there comments how many people are truly affected by their parents control over their hair as a child, which is comforting. My mom would always chop my hair to my shoulders as a kid, told me that if I couldn’t take care of it I couldn’t have it longer, and then proceeded to never teach me how to take care of it. When my parents divorced I grew my hair out. I enjoyed it so much. Didn’t know how to take care of it, so that part wasn’t great, but I felt so pretty having it long and for a long time it was the only thing I liked about myself. I did get it cut short last year, but that was fully my choice and I never regretted it because I had finally gotten a chance to have it how I wanted it all through my young childhood.
Same. My mom wanted a tom-boy to go with her 3 other princess obsessed daughters. She would always chop my hair off until I was 16. Whenever anyone would comment she’d say “oh yes haha she my little tomboy” like it was my desire that she’d generously fulfilled.
I had the opposite problem. My mom banned short hair until I had a mat of hair so bad that you could make a rug out of it. I was so sensitive to hair brushing that when she told me to do it myself (without instruction) I just didnt. I now cut my hair regularly because mental disorders suck, but having long hair is now a badge of pride for me because I kept up with it for so long.
Same! I fought for 11 years to have my hair long after consistently having it cut up to my ears or shorter without my consent. I now only have it up to my shoulders and I'm really stressed because every 5 seconds I will get a comment from my parents on how I should cut it short. It's gotten to the point where I get terrified every time my mum calls me or picks up scissors because I think she's about to chop my hair off.
Lol for me it was the opposite... my mom didnt want us to cut our hair but would also not properly teach us to take care of it. We would know to brush it and wash it with cheap soaps and that was it 😅 now that we are older we like cutting our hair because we were practically forced to keep it long..dont get me wrong, i actually really like long hair.. but its a lot of maintenance and if you are used to it its fine, but i wasnt and i had a lot of split ends cause it wasnt actually being taken care of. Id rather have taken care of hair then the extra length 😊
One of the best things my mom did was getting mine cut off when I was 4 because both of us hated brushing and washing my hair after that when I was old enough to do my own I still hated doing it so now I shave my head but when I was a kid I would keep it real short. It was also one of the best lessons I learned if you don't like doing something and you can't maintain it it's probably not worth having. And the upside to shaving my head is I save hundreds of dollars a year by doing it myself.
Honestly wished my parents were more laced about my hair. It felt like my parents cared more about other people’s approval rather than their own child’s.
I wanted short hair since I was like 8, my mom would not let me cut it for years. She said girls are supposed to have hair down to their waist. I thought it was stupid, and I hated the way it looked.
I was the child. My mom was a hair dresser. She was determined that I get my hair brushed and my dad was like "Cut it off!." My mom is now waiting for things to come back around with my child. 😆 This woman ain't lying and it's not abuse.
It's abuse if you force a child to submit to unnecessary pain and suffering. I don't understand parents who claim that they don't want to "submit" to their children. Like wtf. That's not submission. It's respecting their personal needs.
@@sebeckleyyeah, when the child is old enough to care about their looks, and has stated to want having their hair a certain way and care about it, yeah, it's abuse to go against it. But, a toddler that doesn't like having their hair brushed because of the knots? Eh, they're 2, they're way too young to care about it. I myself didn't started to care until I was like 3 or 4, and it was similar for my cousins as well, it's around the age when they're starting to develop their sense of individuality a little more to start caring about expressing it on their appearance.
My grandma snapped and freaked out brushing my long, thick, curly hair when I was a kid, attacked me with the brush, and hacked all my hair off in a rage the day before picture day in first grade because of tangles. I look so sad in the pictures, and I remember I felt so ugly and embarrassed. You did it the right way ❤
My grandma did the same! It was back in the days of pixies. It looked like she put a bowl on my head lol looked awful My hair too was long and curly. But poor grandma had, had enough. I was 5 I think.
Exactly. My mum lost it with my hair and I ended up with a literal boys hair cut. I was seven, it was the 80's and girls did not have boys haircuts. It was traumatising. If she'd got me a bob, it would have been fine.
@@sallywaites8517same...I still remember a 5th grade boy asking me, 6 year old girl(I was really tall for my age), to play football until he realized I was a girl. My mom's son (I refuse to sat brother) still, 35+ years later, laughs/jokes about that...very traumatizing for sure!
From birth until 13 I forced my sister to keep her hair. She hated it. It’s thick and unruly, knotted in big matted clumps regularly. One day she sent me a video of herself cutting it all off, my heart broke. I had it in my head that her hair was this part of who she was. To this day I regret what I did to her. She’s 17 and STILL rocking her pixie cut. All those years of what are now trauma to her, could have easily been avoided by me letting go.. Let kids be kids.
Don’t feel bad, you didn’t “force” her. You may have convinced her but that’s partly on her for believing you! Like, if I told my sister every single day that she’d look better with [insert random hairstyle here] she still wouldn’t get that hairstyle unless she actually wanted to.
@@emmanarotzky6565 i mean. no? not necessarily? bullying and coercion are things that exist, and OP literally describes their sister's experience as traumatic. when kids are small, they are easily manipulated and hurt. that's not their fault. to OP, i'm glad that both you and your sister are happier now and no longer in that situation, that your sister has the hair she wants, and that you understand more about kids than you once did. if you were a kid too, then don't be too hard on yourself, none of us are born perfectly mature. hope you guys have a good relationship these days ❤
I love that you kept her involved in the process. My mom made that same decision, but kept up the decision of her own all the way up until I was about 12!
That's exactly what little munchkin looked before we got it cut... She would get anything tangled in there, cried and wailed for hours on end until she had enough. All I could do was what my mother did for me...✂️✂️✂️✂️
Wish I had learned the wonders of short hair earlier in life. As a kid I absolutely hated having my hair brushed yet somehow I seemed to have long hair for much of my life. I love having short hair. One of the worst things is just that I don’t have enough to donate when I get a haircut.
I would just keep letting mine grow until it was long enough to donate, then lop it all off again. Sadly, my hair grows much more slowly now and there's probably too big of a grey ratio to donate it anyway. So now I'm happily dying my greying hair purple and teal and periwinkle... I spent my entire childhood and young adult life with very short hair. It was thick and heavy and healthy, but if it got even a little bit of length on it I would burn up with heat. There was just too much of it! I didn't actually grow my hair for the first time until my 30s, then grew/chopped/donated, grew/chopped/donated. I'm glad you love your short hair, I always loved it too. 💜
My hair is just past my shoulders and it’s driving me mad! Short hair saved me from frustration and tangles. I can’t wait till I have the money to get a few inches off!
You could donate your short hair to organisations that use the cuts for cleaning up oil patches on the sea 😊 they don't need long hair, if I recall correctly
I absolutely love that make-up. It is perfect. I am also here for the two-year-olds with club. They not only look absolutely cute in bobs, but it makes hair fun and manageable until they can help manage it themselves.
Thank you for your content. Every time I'm doubting myself as a mother, one of your videos shows up in my recommended and just lifts me up and reassures me that I'm doing the best job I can and stressing myself out to try to be the perfect mom was only hurting me and my kids.
It likely also helps that their mom is open to short hair/had short hair! Even when I wanted to cut my own hair short, I always felt pressure not to, because everyone in my family had long hair and there was a sense of family pride in our hair. I remember really wanting an undercut when I was a teen but my mom always said I’d regret it-now I have a short men’s cut that I absolutely adore ❤
Bro just to get hair I had to beg for years cus my mom knew I wanted to look like a guy. Going short was the best decision ever. I’m glad you got the cut that suits you
My mom has no patience so I would deliberately make a huge fuss every time she did my hair till she cut it; I can’t tell you how happy that made me. To this day I still keep my hair under an inch. It’s stress free and I can have fun with colours.
I LOVE this!!! I had to cut my daughter's hair short when she was 2, as well, for the same exact reasons. Got a ton of negative bullshit, and backlash from my family because she's a "girl, and girls are suppose to have long hair". She's 5 now, and is still rocking the inverted Bob with short bangs 😊🖤
My mom did the exact same thing to me when I was younger and I am actually super grateful. I used to despise brushing my hair and it was always very tangled and knoted so my mom said to me that if I wasn't going to take care of my hair and brush it then we were going to get it cut. Next thing I know my hair was stopped at my chin but from that day forward I took really great care of my hair and now it is the thing that I have the most pride in when it comes to my appearance.
@@funforlife9893 I used to have curly hair and every time my mom brushed it out (she rarely brushed it when it was wet and she didn't wash or condition my hair well) it was a battle worthy enough to be put in Demon Slayer as the ultimate boss fight until she chopped it off
thank you for being so open and honest with your parenting! i feel like so many moms (especially online) are always talking about how perfect they are or their kids are, but not enough are showing the realities of parenting like you are. i appreciate this content so much
Unfortunately most parents are absolutely terrified to post anything good or bad because some Karen will call for state intervention for the parents harming their kids.
I really appreciate your content. As a dad of 3 girls (they’re a younger than your crew), it’s so nice to hear from another parent with good humour and love for their fam. Cheers. You’ve brightened a lot of days.
This reminded me of a little girl from my moms daycare, maybe a little younger than 3 with beautiful curly hair that was down to her shoulders. One day she showed up with a pixie cut and everyone was kinda shocked but her mom said the kid hated when she brushed her hair so she cut it. The girl really couldn't have cared less, she was probably to young to care anyways and she still looked super cute.
Same issue different method. Instead of cutting hers I chose to give her locs like mine when she was 4. She's 5 now and She absolutely loves her locs and loves telling people that she and mommy have matching hair.
And it'll result in an older child who understands how to look after their hair properly :) I'm an elder millennial and while I don't have coily hair, I'm only just learning how to look after it in a way different to the suitable-for-straight-hair way I learnt as a child.
I wish my parents did this lmao I was the same exact way but my dad was so firm on me being his "little girl" that he would get mad if I even brought it up. Finally got my hair cut to the length I want it once my dad was out of my life and the amount of relief I felt when I could brush my hair and not cry. it makes me happy to see parents that are awesome like you.
My mom never let me cut my hair no matter how much I begged. Cue me being able to finally decided what I want with my hair and being to afraid to decide to change it. My hair had always looked the same and I was scared. Now I'm an adult with very short hair and I love it so much.
One of the things that were awful to me as an undiagnosed autistic child was my hair being brushed.. it was long and wavy so it got knotted really easily.. I wish my parents would have just cut it short, instead I had to wait until I was 14.. and even then my mom threatened to make me pay for my own haircut if I was going to cut it that short.. she ended up loving the haircut, and so did I. It was not only great as an autistic kid with MANY sensory issues, but also as a closeted trans kid
Hey, your video from the other day about becoming a gentle parent after not being one, made me cry. I’m 40 and my youngest is 14, so I’m really late in the game, but better late than never, right lol? Thanks for the lessons and daily inspiration to keep striving to be a better woman and mother. I hope you’re having a great day today.
This isn't terrible!!! I hated brushing my hair too! My mom took me to the salon and let me choose what Bob I wanted and it helped me realize what hair I wanted for the rest of my life and reduced the fights!!!! Edit: 12 years later and it's still a happy shoulder leingth! Sometimes i wear extensions but ill always keep it chin-shoulder leingth!
When I was little I hated getting my hair brushed to the point of complete melt downs every day. My mom gave me the option to either get my hair cut short or to try and tolerate the brushing and I chose to get my hair cut. After that it was so easy to brush my hair that eventually I got used to it and ended up growing out my hair pretty long again. Nothing wrong with choosing the easy way, it's called the easy way for a reason lol
It’s so weird how people react to little girls with short hair! I loved having a short pixie for years and also had a daughter who hated having her hair handled. I made sure she was happy with the decision and only cut it about chin length and everyone “felt sorry for her”. I was like wtf she’s still cute and happy!
I'm 3 seconds in and YOU DO YOU! I was so tender-headed, yet could not brush my own hair well, that my mom did the same thing to save us both the pain and anxiety.
We cut my 5 year old daughter’s hair short just a few weeks ago for this exact same reason! She is very independent and loves to be able to do her own hair, so she was totally on board when she knew she would be able to do it herself a lot easier!! ❤
Let me preface this by saying, if your child wanted this and is happy, I’m happy for y’all. My mom did this to me and I still resent her for it. My hair was down to my hips and she made me get a very short layered bob around 8yo. I didn’t even get to pick the haircut I got. I cried on the way there, the entire time in the chair, on the way home, and multiple times in the following weeks. I HATED IT. I could see if she was helping me wash, dry, style, etc. but she didn’t, just screamed at me to do it myself without teaching me first. If she did “help”, she was basically just pulling my hair the whole time. My hair to this day will not grow past the middle of my back. It upsets me so much.
I mean, it's not the same thing; her child was 2. I don't know about you, but my kids didn't have much opinions about their hair when they were 2... So it's the best moment to cut if off to teach them slowly how to tolerate the sensations when you brush it. Also, the difference is there; your mom didn't seem to want to help you, but she did it to help her daughter learn.
@@sk22-12 I understand it’s not the same, that’s why I started by saying I’m happy for both of them if her child is happy. I wasn’t trying to say she forced this on her daughter or anything, just sharing what happened to me. The video just brought up my past experiences with my hair and I had to get it all out. No hate/anger towards anyone, was just in a rut at the time I originally commented. ♥️
@M I understand that. I replied to another comment clarifying the intent of my original comment wasn’t to say she forced this on her daughter or anything like that. This video just reminded me of my past experiences between my mom and my hair and I wanted to share some of that. I’m not projecting anything, just sharing my experience. As I said to the other commenter, no hate/anger towards anyone, just trying to clarify. 💜
This is honestly lovely to see. I don’t have kids, but I have really thick hair for a white person and it was Merida levels of curly when I was a kid, and I’m autistic. Whenever my poor mother would try to brush my hair, neither of us really knew the best way to do it for my hair type and I would end up crying in pain a whole lot. Even as I got older I would despise brushing my hair because it hurt so much I’d snap at anyone who came to talk to me during it. Now I have much shorter hair as an adult and know how to start from the bottom, so it’s miles better
I had this happen to me older elementary age .. and I had an at the time "grandma" extremely short, because I didn't brush the back of my hair. I was traumatized because no one told me anything just suddenly all my hair was being chopped. COMPLETELY different situation.
My mom did this to me. I was 6 and never had my hair cut. I had beautiful long curly hair to my waist and my mom chopped it to my ears. My dad actually cried bc he was so upset about it and they were divorced so she didn't tell him beforehand. Now, I'm 35 and won't let my hair get cut above shoulder length.
I was 6-ish and had very thick, tangle-prone hair, wouldn't brush out my hair nor let mom do it even with an entire bottle of detangling spray. I initinally loved how easy it was to care for a pixie cut. (*initially, as I kept being mistaken for a boy, especially when my tomboy phase started)
I personally had this exact same experience but at age 8 so it personally have affected me a lot because I was teased heavily and now I won’t have short hair and don’t feel comfortable cutting my hair.
I never understood why people assume hair length has anything to do with gender. (Not coming at you, coming at the people who misgendered you). I know so many older ladies with pixie cuts it’s insane. And I grew up with dudes who had long hair. Heck, long hair on men has been in fashion for a very, very long time, so why is a woman with short hair any different? It’s all just silly lol
My husband has super thick, curly hair. Aka a tangle trap waiting to happen. Our son is almost 9 months old and has clearly inherited his father's hair. We've already agreed that the cute curls are not going to be worth the battle, if he doesn't want to sit still for me to brush his hair we're keeping it cut short until he's older.
For my curly hair my mom would distract me in the bath with toys cover my hair on conditioner and brush it while I played I still brush my hair in the shower to this day it’s much easier!
Please, I am begging you, don’t try and brush curly hair dry. It is not worth it. Do what @Sherry Yrs suggested and get wet and covered in conditioner first. And I’m sure that you already know this, but curly hair does not need to be brushed daily, just brush his hair when you wash it. Also, congrats on becoming a parent!
Ironically, my parents did this with me. I hated hair brushing and baths so my mom asked me (5-6ish) if instead I wanted to cut my hair short. I agreed quickly and we were both happy. Now, 12 years later and manny hairstyles later, I'm almost back where I started, short Bob like hair cut.
A very VERY similar thing happened to my sister, she has a lot of sensory issues, so when she was little she hated how her hair felt on the back of her neck, and my mom let her cut it. Now she loves her hair and is growing it out to be really long, everything takes time 🙂
At first I was like “that’s very messed up though” then I heard “she’s two” and everything made sense lmao
yeah no one is saying this but THATS the key here! Once they are old enough to consider hair style part of their identity it's no longer your choice. But this i have no problem with at all!
LMAO
I wish my mom cut my hair even up 7, my hair tangled so easy back and I hated getting my hair combed and she would brush it so violently. In our family photo when I was four I had what she called a rats nest and I remember being scolded for not brushing it beforehand. But she always had this dream of me having long flowing hair and that just wasn’t reality till I was 16.
Like I feel until the kid says they want longer or different hair, doing something that makes hygiene easier is fine and it doesn’t have to be an ugly hair cut either
@@calliemyersbuchanan6458 I was complete reverse of this whole thing and always had long hair and always liked my long hair. My Mom said she was gonna trim it once when I was about 5 and cut off only 2 or 3 inches and I lost my 💩.
I started screaming and crying about how she cut off my hair. She never cut off my hair again.
Took me a good 30 years to be convinced to go to a salon to have my hair "trimmed". Still didn't like it.
I've learned layering is better instead of just cutting across, so I later my hair at home myself.
I was born with hair and have always had hair.
Yeah, I personally think it's worse to keep it long and suffer when brushing it
The “shes two” line saved u honestly 😭 2 year olds are feral
Feral until they get older and they are tamed 💀
@@douma858 and then they go feral again in the teenage years
I don’t see how it “saved” her. An older child should be brushing their own hair and would be far worse leaving them looking dishevelled, just so people won’t think you’re mean, for not brushing an older child’s hair.
@@kirstybrown1185 girl. It’s not that serious. Let ur New Year’s resolution be to calm the hell down
Feral! 🤣☠️🤣
"Work smarter not harder" seems like the best advice on everything, including managing kids. Good on you! 👏
work more sleep less
“Hey, cousin it. Wanna get your hair done”
I’m dead💀
Lmao
😂😂😂yes another honest Mom!
😂😂😂😂 love it ❤️
Lol I just live how she did that. But if it was me I would stare at my mom like "really mother?" 😑
*shake**shake**shake* 😂
i desperately wanted my mom to let me do this for years, your daughter will thank you. you’re an amazing parent
3K likes and no comments? Lemme fix that
My mom wouldn't let me cut my hair short either!!!! I finally did it myself and got in trouble lol
@@Duolingo_bird22 i guess you’re a hero. play in traffic.
Shes so cool she has a uwigi board as decor sorry for bad spelling
same here, until I was 9 i had never gotten a real haircut, just my mom chopping off the last inch once a year and i could only wear platts and also my hair was quite heavy. Cut my hair at school after sticking a chewing gum in it as a reason for cutting it off. I was disciplined for that and 10+ years later my parents totally forgot about how they controlled my hair length.
"Pick your battles" applies to toddlers as much as war.
Toddlers act like war soldiers honestly 😂
Fighting with toddlers is a war 😭
@@Personofawesom not if you're doing it right.
Amen
@@Personofawesomnot when you have a gun
Um. Same. In fact. She asked me to cut her hair off because the payoff of “cute hair” didn’t balance with the “ouch this sucks” of the actual action of doing her hair FOR HER. She weighed the cost vs payoff and decided “it’s a bob for me thanks” AT FIVE YEARS OLD… I said “same babe” and chopped mine too. And as our hair grows out, we will both be reassessing the situation together. Separately but together. Because… same babe. ❤
Same here!
I had that conversation with my family at 8 and now I keep my hair shor because I like it better
I was this child. My mom got mad I kept my hair short even when older, but I loved it
I had gorgeous long hair as a kid but refused to take care of it. Mom says "that's enough, you have to get it cut." We go to a salon (someplace inexpensive), I'm allowed to pick out ANY hairstyle that I want that is shoulder length or above. We spent a week looking through catalogs and magazines and the Internet- something I'd like. Something I chose myself with my mom's help. So while yes I was forced to cut my hair, it wasn't a traumatizing experience, and I kept my hair in a buzzed pixie cut or undercut for many years after that because of how much I loved my short hair. Now that I CAN and know HOW to take care of my hair, I really do love having it long though. Honestly I barely think about the incident unless something prompts it because it was so inconsequential and didn't have any long term side effects. Love my mom.
@@jeanniemccain3045 this was how my first short cut happened too, with the addition of an older sister and gum. My sister and I are 3 years apart, but everyone thought we were twins, so one day when I dozed off in the car (probably 5-6 years old) she smashed gum in my hair to the point taking out a huge chunk was the only option. I ended up loving it
I totally get it. My daughter (6) couldn't stand her hair being brushed. She loves her short hair but loves getting it put up too
My (now adult) daughter loved her long hair because she loved wearing it in Baby Spice ponytails. However, her school started sending home regular alerts that students had been found to have lice, and she ended up with them a few times. We both hated the shampoo, which left her hair so knotted and tangled that it took forever to comb them all out. Then, after that there were the 2-3 hours we spent with me sitting on the sofa, while she sat on a small chair in front of me, while I meticulously went through her hair with the lice comb and my fingers, looking for eggs. We hated the whole thing, especially since I was so diligent, and made sure she was lice/egg free when she went back to school, only for her to have them again a week or 2 later because other parents weren't so diligent.
This was a painful process for her to go through, so I finally told her that she was going to have to get her hair cut. I told her that, unfortunately, it couldn't stop her from getting lice again, but if she did, short hair would make it much easier for me to go through her hair, and there would be much less hair to get tangled after shampooing...it would be much less painful for her.
She was understandably upset, but we made it a decision she had a say in. We went through pictures of short haircuts, and I let her choose her new hairstyle. The more time we spent looking at styles, the more excited she got about getting her hair cut. When she realized that I wasn't planning on taking her to a barber and getting her a crewcut, and that a short style could still be girly (and she was very girly at that age), and could still accommodate the barrettes and hairbands she loved, she was totally onboard.
I made the day of her haircut a girls' day out, getting her nails painted with cute little ladybugs, shopping for a couple new outfits, and lunch at a "fancy" restaurant. I explained the situation to the hair stylist, and he was fantastic. He treated her like a princess, and showed her various ways that she could wear her hair, and how she could wear her favourite accessories. He truly made it feel like a special occassion for her that she was fully involved in, instead of something that was being done to her.
When her hair started growing out, she came to me and asked if she could get it cut again. We ended up going back to that same stylist for years, until he left to work in another city. She's 30 now, and has worn her hair short ever since. She's tried a couple times to grow it out, but realises that she really does look better with short hair, and because her hair is very fine, she's actually able to do more with it when it's short.
@@Terri_MacKay Hate lice outbreaks in schools. There are always those few parents that refuse to treat their kids' hair at all.
@@Kalani_Saiko Always!! And of course, they were the kids with the long hair. You knew who the diligent parents were because at around the same time, a whole bunch of girls were getting their hair cut short.
My mother used to say “you’re under my roof. And as long as you are, you can’t cut your hair.” My grandmother gave me a pixie haircut when I was 16 since I was living with her, and my mother was no longer in charge. My mother hated it. One of the best days of my life. Now 30, and I still use my hair as a symbol of my rebellion and freedom.
Very odd to me when parents choose to revoke their child’s autonomy in this way.
@@Almondmylk Happens more then you think
I feel this!! I used to beg my mum to let me cut my
long hair beyond just getting a trim but it was always “I’m not going to have everyone blame me for my daughter looking like a boy”. once I turned 18 one of the first things I did was get my hair cut and the compliments came rolling in because surprise! When you have some control over your appearance you’re going to put more effort into it! Now that everyone loves my short hair she likes to act like we couldn’t get it cut short because we were poor lol
I was able to cut my hair but under no circumstances was I able to color my hair until I was 14 years of age. I’m 20 now and I just now went back to my natural hair color with blonde underneath and money pieces. That’s 6 years I hated my natural hair for. I’m grateful that she didn’t let me color it or do anything completely drastic but I think she should’ve let me color it alittle for some freedom cause i almost fried my hair dying it so much
Hi I'm 18, I haven't had my hair short since I was 5 and just wanted to ask what was your mom's excuse for not letting you cut it? My Dad won't let me cut anything more than my tips, and while I don't mind it it does bother me because I live in tropical weather and have curly/wavy hair.
You don't have to answer, but I I like seeing a comment I could relate to 😊
As a child with an extremely sensitive scalp, i would have thanked you excessively.
@@PinkeerbaBa-dd3sqI get what you're saying, and agree. But at least in this video, she was only 2. At that age, they're not really going to have an opinion about how it looks anyway, at tjat age it just doesn't matter to them. I'm glad you and your siblings got some peace eventually with that issue.
@@PinkeerbaBa-dd3sqShe literally speaks about how now 4 year old feels
@@PinkeerbaBa-dd3sqprobably because she wasn’t bothered, she’s TWO.
@@PinkeerbaBa-dd3sq someone that young being emotionally affected isn’t great I agree, but even if they do get upset somebody that age would probs be over it in 20 mins time so I wouldn’t worry
I ended up cutting my own hair off when I was three cuz it caused so much agony xD mom came home to hair strewn all over my bed XD
I actually really needed to hear that part at the end where you say “we teach our kids lots of things, but it doesn’t have to be all at once.” I think I’m extremely stressed out because it made me cry… subscribed
I so get it! Parenting is wild. Hope you can take care of yourself today ❤️
Take a moment, grab a coffee/tea/drink of choice, take a deep breath, and remind yourself that *you are a good parent* .
This random person on the internet knows you're a good parent *because* you're worried about ensuring that you teach your child everything they need to know. It means you care. You have those special things that make a good parent - love and a desire to do right by your child. Everything will fall into place after that.
And ignore Instagram "parenting influencers" - it's all just curated BS, none of it's real. Gwenna (Momma Cusses) has the right idea - go at the pace that's right for you and your child, accept that perfection is unrealistic, and do your best. So long as you're both happy and healthy then you're doing a great job. Other people's unrealistic depictions of perfection are harmful and can shove it 😉
Hang in there - you've got this 💖
You got this❤
I'm not a parent (nor do I ever want to be one) but I absolutely love watching this woman's takes on parenting and teaching kids things. It's refreshing and oddly motivating for someone like me who doesn't have any desire to be around kids. I love and respect her videos so much.
Awww ya that part hit me too and my son is 27. Don’t be hard on yourself. I wish this lady was my fellow mom friend - grateful for her insights
I love this! Working in childcare we had a toddler who came in with a bob and then a pixie cut because she hated having her hair in her face. She adored her short hair
You gave her a stylish hair cut to help with her and you maintaining it. That’s so far from abuse.
Definitely not abuse, idk anybody who would say otherwise.
She's not harming her daughter, hell, I'd say she's even helping her daughter because the daughter couldn't tolerate her hair being brushed for a long time so they had it cut so that she could have a better time + less time needed to brush her hair.
Abuse is like beating… Cutting someone’s hair is not abuse please 😭😭
Edit: 🥲
(It is abuse I just was lazy to research so I practically assumed, because I saw some comments saying that cutting someone’s hair was not abuse so I just believe them 😭)
People in the comments are pretty calm about it so I am really not sure if it’s really “abuse”.
@@sienasonastar okay so, there are a lots of different types of abouse, not just that
@@mellon_c0llie1 Actually they might be talking about the beating type of abuse. There is absolutely no abuse that does cutting hairs as abuse (probably). Cutting someone's hair is an assault. It is illegal to cut someone's hair without their consent. I also were talking about the abuse they might be talking about like beating. (Anyways I was just being random checking comments and sometimes correcting them.) I was also in a rush when I was commenting for no reason so I didn't say it very formally.
@@sienasonastar You are contradicting yourself. It’s not abuse, but it is assault? Please elaborate.
that makes sense, y’all increased her tolerance gradually that way instead of making her get used to it all at once. smart
When I was four or five, I was so sick of my hair needing to be brushed that I cut it myself and my mom was so mad she beat me. I wish I had a mom like you
I'm sorry that happened to you
my little brother has been cutting his hair off himself for years. our parents do everything they can to stop him and force him to grow it out, but the moment he's out of sight, he finds a pair of scissors and cuts it. it makes them so furious that they can't just magically grow it back out.
i'm sorry your mom treated you like that. your body does not belong to her and never, ever did
Honestly, You sound like the best mom ever, which means your mug is 100% true
I've got three girls and I tell them every time they complain about me brushing their hair, "If you don't like it so much then we can cut it short, but if we don't brush it it will become dirty and matted and unhygienic." Two kept it long, one learned how to brush her own hair and one hated it so much we cut it short, all three of them are still happy with their choices a year later. 🤷♀️
I teach that to my tots too. I let them watch TV, have the iPad, and I have a special toy stowed away for power outages while I brush their hair. They are free to cut their hair whenever they want to or we make fun by distracting them.
try detangling it damp with conditioner in, with a comb starting from the ends working up to the head. also, you can take them to a salon and ask for it to be thinned, that helps a lot especially if they have thick hair
3 kids, 2 kept it long, one brushes her own and one cut it off. 3 = 4?😂
I find most hair brushing struggles come from using the wrong brush. Get a really gentle brush like a tangle teezer, if it feels like it's slipping over the knots then that's perfect. Split the hair in 4 sections to make the process of brushing faster, regular trims and layers help a lot and a good deep conditioning.
Fine hair is best brushed dry after washing. Thick or curly hair is best brushed wet with conditioner in.
@jadevt1939 three daughters, A, B and C, two kept it long, one cut it.
A= let's the commenter brush her long hair.
B= brushes her long hair.
C= cut her hair.
I think that is what they wrote, two long-haired children, one of them brushes it on their own.
My mom did not let scissors touch my hair until I was 12 and spent every moment before that royally pissed that my hair was knotted, tangled and I hated having it brushed and styled. Letting kids choose how they want to look and to have bodily autonomy is important, but I can promise you it's not achieved by spending any amount of time fighting and crying about hair every day.
Same this happened to me! I got my first real haircut when I was 12 and I never felt better!
Also. It's hair. It's grows back
Did any of you also have tbe phase where as soon as you moved out you did EVERYTHING to your hair? My mom never let me touch anything for myself so as soon as I left I dyed it purple and got a side shave lol. I like dying it still but the side shave was too much upkeep for me
@@thebigmystery7841 yes. The aforementioned haircut at twelve saw me go from hair past my butt to what the kids are now calling the wolf cut up to my chin. I've had bleach blonde pixies and bobs, long brunette layers, red Bettie Page bangs, and something that resembled Marilyn Monroe's hair but with pink streaks. Now I'm back to waist length natural hair because I say I'm entering my hippie arc, but the truth is I don't have the patience for the upkeep anymore and just plaster my face with all the smokey eyeshadow and moody lipstick I also wasn't allowed to wear. 😂
@@mallory5777 yoooo the upkeep yes. Feels good to at least get to express ourselves after tho lmao
Honestly is kinda what my mom did for me and I am really thankful she did. I have insanely thick hair, hated having her brush/wash it, and she didn't have the time or energy to fight me over it so I had a bowl cut for years. The trade off, she told me, is that once I learned how to take care of my own hair that I could pick whatever hairstyle I wanted, and she was true to her word. I eventually got sick of the bowl cut, actively learned how to wash and brush my own hair, and she let me do what I wanted from that day forward.
@@hakasims I'd probably say pre-K/Kindergarten-ish? I'd have to go back and look at school pictures to be sure
Yeah I would have meltdowns about getting my hair brushed it felt like I was having a seizure I would throw up and cry and have trouble breathing
Mine was the same but toxic and I enjoyed getting my hair done. I just didn't know how to take care of it and all she would tell me is "brush from the bottom up" and I'd do it, and then she would tell me I'm doing it wrong. Then my dad cut it off with paper scissors. If it had been done with consideration, yes, great tactic. It was not. I'm glad it was done gently with you. I still brush my hair "the wrong way" as an adult according to my mom and she can't even brush my hair anymore without it being painful and making knots. Haven't met anyone in my adult life that can do it gently. (It takes fucking time). I don't have coarse kinky hair. It's loose waves at best that go away once combed or brushed.
Sounds like my mom..she chopped my hair off..my hair was long and straight but she let my YOUNGER sister with long blond curly hair keep her hair..I don’t know about as a child but as an adult I DO NOT have a sensitive scalp but my sister can’t stand her scalp touched and has never had her hair cut..I think it sound like mom just didn’t like my hair as well as she did my sisters!
Same I was like 5 or 6 but then when I was 8 I got my hair cut short and I’m 9 now. Because my bday is after Halloween lol
As a hairstylist I approve of this. Even before I was a mom I always said "if ya want long hair then you need to take care of it yourself OR be able to handle having someone do it for you." My kid tried to grow her hair out in kindergarten and I supported her, but when brushing became a fight I calmly explained that it would be easier with shorter hair and eventually she asked for a bob. Thankfully she was old enough to reason with. At two I just gave her haircuts whenever it became tangled and she never said anything about it 🤷♀️
"Hey, cousin It. Wanna get your hair done?" 😂😂
🤣🤣🤣
Love the reference 😂
That’s got me dead 🤣🤣🤣
🤣🤣🤣 That was my nickname for my daughter when we went through the hair scare.
💀💀✋🏻
At least you took her to the salon. My mom would try to “just trim my bangs” by herself. She was a secretary 😂
Ohhhh, I feel this. My mom decided to chop my hair off in third grade, without my consent. And no, she did not have the skills needed to do it correctly.
I have photos my parents had done of me when I was two and my mom decided to cut my bangs herself beforehand. I had kind of a very short poofy bob, with overly short bangs. It looked like my mom had cut the front out of a stemless pumpkin and stuck it on my head. That was back in 1968. So sad.
ABSOLUTELY. Have a hairdresser cut her hair! It's faster, easier on you both, and will look SO much better.
When I was little, I hated having my super long hair brushed and styled. I was super tender headed and it hurt. I wish my mom would have done that or made me aware of the option. She did her best but it was a long time ago and long hair on little girls seemed like the only option in my world. Good on you for making it easier on her and facilitating her comfort and later on, her choice.
Same here. Completely agree.
Same, my scalp is really sensitive now because of how hard my mom used to brush my hair, now whenever I have to brush my hair it hurts. It also didn't help that my hair was very curly and my mom didn't know how to handle it, she wouldn't even use products for curly hair and let my hair grow down to waist lenght
I've always had really fine hair that tangles sooo easily. My nan would brush from the top down, tangling any knots and tugging on my scalp to the point I'd try and brush my own hair to avoid the pain which would have me in tears on a daily basis. Unfortunately I was also brushing top down so wasn't very good, resulting in a more painful brushing session from her. Worst thing that happened was I got nits around age 6, I got a buzz cut cos she didn't want to deal with me crying if she did the treatment, I was devastated and still can't forgive her for that because it was done out of her ignorance and laziness. If I remember correctly my brother and I had matching hair cuts for a while and my older sister got to keep her easy to manage Goldilocks curls and even though other girls got nits too they also didn't get so much as a trim so my hair really stood out... Not a happy camper.
Though in this case the child is too young to care or remember, when they get older I know she will discuss options and repercussions of hair care, cos she's a good parent.
Me and my sister were capable of growing waist length hair and everyone kept telling our mom not to cut it. IT WAS AWFUL (and we have a lot of thick curly coily hair), 2 tender headed babies and a heavy handed mama... nooope. Now as an adult me and my sister both keep our SHORT. Like at one point I SHAVED MY HEAD because no... too much hair.
Totally agree. The whole idea of making them suffer unnecessarily is almost never actually teaching them a lesson. It’s a power trip. My wife begged for years for her mom to let her cut her hair because it was tangled and gave her headaches but her mom dug her heels in and refused because “short hair is hideous, you don’t want to be ugly, you want to be pretty.”
Sometimes enduring hard things is necessary for building character and learning how to do life, but like you said, not at 2. You don’t get a badge of honor for enduring something for the sake of suffering.
my 6 1/2 recently had her first haircut, because she didn't want to brush it. it's shoulder length so not short short but it's definitely made a huge difference in how knotty it gets and how fast. the first two days after her haircut she honestly brushed her hair all day 😂 she was like "wow, this is so easy, I'm never letting my hair get long ever again"
in fact I look up from typing this and she's brushing it right now
God that’s adorable. I have a 2.5 year old boy and his hair GREW but he was bald on the sides so he literally genetically grew a mullet for the first year and a half of his life for no reason 😂😂😂 it’s all in now but I remember his first haircut he was running his hands all over his head giggling, he does that for the first few days after every haircut now 😂
My parents took the route of "if you want long hair you have to take care of it yourself" and then didn't let me cut my hair. Cue me going to school with greasy matted waist-length hair because I was 6 and was never taught how to take care of it. I'm glad you made a choice that helped both you and your kiddo.
Wow.. im actually sorry for you due to this, it screams a little bit of neglection for me.. how is the relation between you and your parents today, if you dont mind me asking?
Thats’s..........an interesting strategy on your parents part🤨
@@zannadunstrand6289 Very strained. I'm going to cut contact as soon as possible. This was one of the least bad things tbh. There was a lot wrong in my childhood.
Geez and here are my parents constantly embarrassed whenever I wear my hair in an Afro because if I look bad they feel embarrassed
@@gianna322 I'm so sorry to hear that, but I wish you the best in the future! ❤️
When I was a kid my parents used to have to trap me in between their legs to brush my hair. I always asked for shorter hair. Even as a grew up a hated having long hair. As a teen while my parents wouldn’t ‘forbid’ me from cutting my hair shorter they would always talk in out of it and say I’d look bad with short hair. It’s created this feeling of hating having long hair but so feeling like I have no other choice because I would look ugly otherwise.
that’s so awful i’m so sorry. ik it means little i’m sure but your look amazing with short hair. there’s so many different ways to style it, so if you haven’t already, i’d say go for it. it’ll be so different and weird but in a good way!!
chop it all off. make the choice to grow it back if YOU want to.
@@ticcitoasty it feels so weird at first. it feels like your head is 5 pounds lighter at first and you end up using way to much shampoo at first.
As someone who's been wanting to get short hair for years, I understand. My hair goes halfway down my back now and I wish I could make it so much shorter, but my mum (who cuts my hair because woo free haircuts) says only medium hair would be good for me
I feel you - I still look at a comb the wrong way and have a massive 15min tangle. I did get a shorter hairdo, still do... I highly recommend shorter hairstyles - it makes everything easier, but going from waist length to men's military is way too much. If you want my opinion - cut it to the length you wouldn't notice much e.g. waist to chest, to half chest, quarter chest, shoulder, to half neck.
Hair grows back, but getting back to your original length, if you don't like it, can be a 3month wait or a 3year wait, and if you just trim the ends, there's no difference. And hair extensions are a hassle, but perfect for special occasions (1-2x per year).
Best of luck 🤞
It ain't called the terrible twos for no reason 😅😂
My mom did this! Friends and family were so mad but you know what? It helped both me and her so much. I hated her for brushing my hair 😂 instead of starting our day with a huge fight we could start it calmly and lovingly. Awesome parenting mama! 🤍 As always, thank you for sharing your world with us!
My mom did it too. I had lots of straight-ish hair as a little one and my mom kept it at a bob (with bangs) for the longest time just so that it would be out of my face with minimal effort. My hair is still thick and straight-ish, but now that I'm able to take care of my hair the way I want, I can wear it the way I want. Can confirm, my childhood had much less screaming. And now I also know how to pick battles with my little girls and their hair.
Me too. I had the Dorothy Hamill cut for a few years because of the tangles and fights.
That was literally me and my mother! Except I refused to let her cut it or even trim. She just stopped helping me and I stopped brushing my hair. After she helped me untangle the rat's nest I had grown on my head, I finally learned to brush my own hair.
I also did this to my daughter. She twisted her pointer finger into her hair to sooth herself, so she always woke up with a head full of knots every morning. One night she woke up screaming: her finger got stuck in her hair and had already turned blue. Next day: hair off, problem solved.
Friends and family were mad at your mom for letting her own child cut her hair?
"Hey cousin it... want to get your hair done?" and the rattle of the brush killed me ^_^ lol
-she's 2
-not all of the hair is gone
-she was more upset at the brushing then the cutting
yeah your fine.
Yeah, but I felt like thinning would’ve been better than cutting, but it isn’t my child so…
You had me at "my daughter was 2"😂 totally relatable
"WWE worthy wrestling matches."
"Hey, cousin it!"
"The great hygiene battle."
💀😂😭 LOVE this woman
😭 I really needed this. I’m considering cutting my daughters hair and I’ve been internally struggling because I feel inadequate as a mom because i wasn’t able to keep up with her hair. This has given me the confidence to just do it. Everyone will be happier
My mom’s blind and would use a fine comb on my hair (paying the price for that today) and always cut the hell out of my ears with it. Cutting my hair so she stopped was the best thing for all of us.
We had a rule that you can have long hair as long as you are willing to take care of it. My daughter has beautiful blonde curly hair that she hated getting brushed. So, at about two we got her "Shirley Temple curls" which are super short and moved on. She became much more confident in her hair - since it was no longer a source of pain. Go for it!
That's what my parents did with my sister. Her hair was very fine and even into her teens she wouldn't take care of it. Now she's 22 and has hair to her waist that she dyes, conditions, and braids.
African hair products, the tangles will go away.
My 2nd daughter ask to cut her hair off as a freshman. I said if your dad says it’s ok, then Ok. We cut it, it’s hair, it grows back.
Me taking notes everyday from her for five years down the road if I even have a kid 😂 I have none now and still watch her
Same here. I watch all sorts of parenting contenting from various creators because I want to be the best parent I can be if and when we get there. Also for interacting with kids in general. You don't have to be a parent to be a gentle caretaker. Whether that's a teacher, an aunt or uncle, a babysitter, a nanny, etc. I just want the kiddos around me to know that I'm a safe person for them.
Same here, honestly.
I’m here happily and I have no desire or plan to EVER have a kid. She’s funny and a lovely person to help restore my faith in humanity. And obviously I gladly share her with anyone who does have/wants children. Plus, some of her stuff is just as helpful with adults as with children 😂
I watch bc I have a niece who lives w me and this woman reminds me very well I need to be patient with the kid even when she's throwin tantrums like softballs💀
I don't have kids but I work at a daycare and I take mental notes from her to better interact with the kids in a way that's healthy for both me and them.
You rock! I love all of your videos! I'm either laughing or knodding in agreement! Bravo!
My mom had a similar rule when I was younger. I was really sensitive to hair brushing when I was younger so she would say, “either brush your hair or cut it.” And I always chose cut. It was fine. She never forced me to cut it, but it was easier for me and for her.
Yup, mine too!
Same here girl
Same here
Noticing in there comments how many people are truly affected by their parents control over their hair as a child, which is comforting. My mom would always chop my hair to my shoulders as a kid, told me that if I couldn’t take care of it I couldn’t have it longer, and then proceeded to never teach me how to take care of it. When my parents divorced I grew my hair out. I enjoyed it so much. Didn’t know how to take care of it, so that part wasn’t great, but I felt so pretty having it long and for a long time it was the only thing I liked about myself. I did get it cut short last year, but that was fully my choice and I never regretted it because I had finally gotten a chance to have it how I wanted it all through my young childhood.
Same. My mom wanted a tom-boy to go with her 3 other princess obsessed daughters. She would always chop my hair off until I was 16. Whenever anyone would comment she’d say “oh yes haha she my little tomboy” like it was my desire that she’d generously fulfilled.
I had the opposite problem. My mom banned short hair until I had a mat of hair so bad that you could make a rug out of it. I was so sensitive to hair brushing that when she told me to do it myself (without instruction) I just didnt.
I now cut my hair regularly because mental disorders suck, but having long hair is now a badge of pride for me because I kept up with it for so long.
Same! I fought for 11 years to have my hair long after consistently having it cut up to my ears or shorter without my consent. I now only have it up to my shoulders and I'm really stressed because every 5 seconds I will get a comment from my parents on how I should cut it short. It's gotten to the point where I get terrified every time my mum calls me or picks up scissors because I think she's about to chop my hair off.
It’s huge that you got to a point where you cut it and were able to do it in a way that made YOU happy and fulfilled. ❤️
Lol for me it was the opposite... my mom didnt want us to cut our hair but would also not properly teach us to take care of it. We would know to brush it and wash it with cheap soaps and that was it 😅 now that we are older we like cutting our hair because we were practically forced to keep it long..dont get me wrong, i actually really like long hair.. but its a lot of maintenance and if you are used to it its fine, but i wasnt and i had a lot of split ends cause it wasnt actually being taken care of. Id rather have taken care of hair then the extra length 😊
One of the best things my mom did was getting mine cut off when I was 4 because both of us hated brushing and washing my hair after that when I was old enough to do my own I still hated doing it so now I shave my head but when I was a kid I would keep it real short. It was also one of the best lessons I learned if you don't like doing something and you can't maintain it it's probably not worth having. And the upside to shaving my head is I save hundreds of dollars a year by doing it myself.
@Kick arse true I forgot about that one.
I truly wish my mother had avoided that battle when I was little!! 😢
Honestly wished my parents were more laced about my hair. It felt like my parents cared more about other people’s approval rather than their own child’s.
Mood
I wanted short hair since I was like 8, my mom would not let me cut it for years. She said girls are supposed to have hair down to their waist. I thought it was stupid, and I hated the way it looked.
As a young first time mum, I cannot Express enough how amazing and helpful your advise is ❤
Cousin IT took me outtttt- lmao I love this lady
One of my own nicknames as a kid when my hair was (finally) growing out and I was learning to keep it out of my face
Cousin It was a nickname in our family. Always made me giggle!
I was the child. My mom was a hair dresser. She was determined that I get my hair brushed and my dad was like "Cut it off!." My mom is now waiting for things to come back around with my child. 😆 This woman ain't lying and it's not abuse.
It's abuse if you force a child to submit to unnecessary pain and suffering. I don't understand parents who claim that they don't want to "submit" to their children. Like wtf. That's not submission. It's respecting their personal needs.
@@sebeckleyyeah, when the child is old enough to care about their looks, and has stated to want having their hair a certain way and care about it, yeah, it's abuse to go against it. But, a toddler that doesn't like having their hair brushed because of the knots? Eh, they're 2, they're way too young to care about it. I myself didn't started to care until I was like 3 or 4, and it was similar for my cousins as well, it's around the age when they're starting to develop their sense of individuality a little more to start caring about expressing it on their appearance.
My grandma snapped and freaked out brushing my long, thick, curly hair when I was a kid, attacked me with the brush, and hacked all my hair off in a rage the day before picture day in first grade because of tangles. I look so sad in the pictures, and I remember I felt so ugly and embarrassed. You did it the right way ❤
My grandma did the same! It was back in the days of pixies. It looked like she put a bowl on my head lol looked awful My hair too was long and curly. But poor grandma had, had enough. I was 5 I think.
Exactly. My mum lost it with my hair and I ended up with a literal boys hair cut. I was seven, it was the 80's and girls did not have boys haircuts. It was traumatising. If she'd got me a bob, it would have been fine.
Grandma sounds abusive
@@sallywaites8517same...I still remember a 5th grade boy asking me, 6 year old girl(I was really tall for my age), to play football until he realized I was a girl. My mom's son (I refuse to sat brother) still, 35+ years later, laughs/jokes about that...very traumatizing for sure!
I’m so sorry that happened to LittleYou. You didn’t deserve that. At all.
From birth until 13 I forced my sister to keep her hair. She hated it. It’s thick and unruly, knotted in big matted clumps regularly. One day she sent me a video of herself cutting it all off, my heart broke. I had it in my head that her hair was this part of who she was. To this day I regret what I did to her. She’s 17 and STILL rocking her pixie cut. All those years of what are now trauma to her, could have easily been avoided by me letting go.. Let kids be kids.
Don’t feel bad, you didn’t “force” her. You may have convinced her but that’s partly on her for believing you! Like, if I told my sister every single day that she’d look better with [insert random hairstyle here] she still wouldn’t get that hairstyle unless she actually wanted to.
@@emmanarotzky6565 i mean. no? not necessarily? bullying and coercion are things that exist, and OP literally describes their sister's experience as traumatic. when kids are small, they are easily manipulated and hurt. that's not their fault.
to OP, i'm glad that both you and your sister are happier now and no longer in that situation, that your sister has the hair she wants, and that you understand more about kids than you once did. if you were a kid too, then don't be too hard on yourself, none of us are born perfectly mature. hope you guys have a good relationship these days ❤
Love your parenting skills and just ur outlook on life. Sending all the love from Dublin, Ireland 🍀
Same!- I hated hair brushing and she said “wanna cut it off” RIGHT BEFORE SCHOOL and I said “yes.” So she did
I love that you kept her involved in the process. My mom made that same decision, but kept up the decision of her own all the way up until I was about 12!
"hey cousin it. Wanna get your hair brushed?" That killed me XD
That's exactly what little munchkin looked before we got it cut... She would get anything tangled in there, cried and wailed for hours on end until she had enough. All I could do was what my mother did for me...✂️✂️✂️✂️
I love the way you parent and how you look at parenting it's amazing
Wish I had learned the wonders of short hair earlier in life. As a kid I absolutely hated having my hair brushed yet somehow I seemed to have long hair for much of my life. I love having short hair. One of the worst things is just that I don’t have enough to donate when I get a haircut.
I would just keep letting mine grow until it was long enough to donate, then lop it all off again. Sadly, my hair grows much more slowly now and there's probably too big of a grey ratio to donate it anyway. So now I'm happily dying my greying hair purple and teal and periwinkle...
I spent my entire childhood and young adult life with very short hair. It was thick and heavy and healthy, but if it got even a little bit of length on it I would burn up with heat. There was just too much of it! I didn't actually grow my hair for the first time until my 30s, then grew/chopped/donated, grew/chopped/donated.
I'm glad you love your short hair, I always loved it too. 💜
My hair is just past my shoulders and it’s driving me mad! Short hair saved me from frustration and tangles. I can’t wait till I have the money to get a few inches off!
You could donate your short hair to organisations that use the cuts for cleaning up oil patches on the sea 😊 they don't need long hair, if I recall correctly
@@Chakrenqueen that is a awesome! Matter of Trust takes pet fur too!
“Hey cousin It wanna get ur hair done” had me dying on the floor
Ikr, it was so fricking cute! 🥰🥺
I've had a bob for my entire life, and they're great! Super easy to brush, and perfect for those with sensitive scalp :)
I absolutely love that make-up. It is perfect. I am also here for the two-year-olds with club. They not only look absolutely cute in bobs, but it makes hair fun and manageable until they can help manage it themselves.
Thank you for your content. Every time I'm doubting myself as a mother, one of your videos shows up in my recommended and just lifts me up and reassures me that I'm doing the best job I can and stressing myself out to try to be the perfect mom was only hurting me and my kids.
It likely also helps that their mom is open to short hair/had short hair! Even when I wanted to cut my own hair short, I always felt pressure not to, because everyone in my family had long hair and there was a sense of family pride in our hair. I remember really wanting an undercut when I was a teen but my mom always said I’d regret it-now I have a short men’s cut that I absolutely adore ❤
Bro just to get hair I had to beg for years cus my mom knew I wanted to look like a guy. Going short was the best decision ever. I’m glad you got the cut that suits you
My mom has no patience so I would deliberately make a huge fuss every time she did my hair till she cut it; I can’t tell you how happy that made me. To this day I still keep my hair under an inch. It’s stress free and I can have fun with colours.
Why didn’t you just tell her lol
Love the mug as you say your parenting 😂
I LOVE this!!! I had to cut my daughter's hair short when she was 2, as well, for the same exact reasons. Got a ton of negative bullshit, and backlash from my family because she's a "girl, and girls are suppose to have long hair". She's 5 now, and is still rocking the inverted Bob with short bangs 😊🖤
My youngest had short hair for awhile. It was adorable on her!, she was h appy & i got a pixie cut! I loved it!
My mom did the exact same thing to me when I was younger and I am actually super grateful. I used to despise brushing my hair and it was always very tangled and knoted so my mom said to me that if I wasn't going to take care of my hair and brush it then we were going to get it cut. Next thing I know my hair was stopped at my chin but from that day forward I took really great care of my hair and now it is the thing that I have the most pride in when it comes to my appearance.
You are the best! Haha “hey cousin it, you want to get your hair done 😂
Thats not horrible parenting thats is ingenious! Good job mom! Pick your battles.
“WWE worthy wrestling matches” 💀
Honestly my sis lol
Honestly living with curly hair like I do that is every time I take a shower!T-T
@@funforlife9893 I used to have curly hair and every time my mom brushed it out (she rarely brushed it when it was wet and she didn't wash or condition my hair well) it was a battle worthy enough to be put in Demon Slayer as the ultimate boss fight until she chopped it off
thank you for being so open and honest with your parenting! i feel like so many moms (especially online) are always talking about how perfect they are or their kids are, but not enough are showing the realities of parenting like you are. i appreciate this content so much
Unfortunately most parents are absolutely terrified to post anything good or bad because some Karen will call for state intervention for the parents harming their kids.
I really appreciate your content. As a dad of 3 girls (they’re a younger than your crew), it’s so nice to hear from another parent with good humour and love for their fam. Cheers. You’ve brightened a lot of days.
Why am I over here just looking at the cup😂
This reminded me of a little girl from my moms daycare, maybe a little younger than 3 with beautiful curly hair that was down to her shoulders. One day she showed up with a pixie cut and everyone was kinda shocked but her mom said the kid hated when she brushed her hair so she cut it. The girl really couldn't have cared less, she was probably to young to care anyways and she still looked super cute.
That color eyeshadow really makes your eye color pop. Well done
Thank you for setting an example for me. I want to be a mom one day and I don't have the best role model to go off of.
You're whole look is FYRE ♡
Same issue different method. Instead of cutting hers I chose to give her locs like mine when she was 4. She's 5 now and She absolutely loves her locs and loves telling people that she and mommy have matching hair.
That's so cute 🖤
And it'll result in an older child who understands how to look after their hair properly :) I'm an elder millennial and while I don't have coily hair, I'm only just learning how to look after it in a way different to the suitable-for-straight-hair way I learnt as a child.
I wish my parents did this lmao I was the same exact way but my dad was so firm on me being his "little girl" that he would get mad if I even brought it up. Finally got my hair cut to the length I want it once my dad was out of my life and the amount of relief I felt when I could brush my hair and not cry. it makes me happy to see parents that are awesome like you.
My mom never let me cut my hair no matter how much I begged. Cue me being able to finally decided what I want with my hair and being to afraid to decide to change it. My hair had always looked the same and I was scared. Now I'm an adult with very short hair and I love it so much.
One of the things that were awful to me as an undiagnosed autistic child was my hair being brushed.. it was long and wavy so it got knotted really easily.. I wish my parents would have just cut it short, instead I had to wait until I was 14.. and even then my mom threatened to make me pay for my own haircut if I was going to cut it that short.. she ended up loving the haircut, and so did I. It was not only great as an autistic kid with MANY sensory issues, but also as a closeted trans kid
You’re common sense approach is utter joy to my social anxiety about the world. I f’ing love you GIRL!!! 🥰🥰🙌🏾
As a first time solo mom to a 2 year old I needed this. So much. I appreciate it more than you'd ever know ❤
I had people questioning why I cut my 1 year old sons hair to keep it short. You'll get questions regardless of what you do
I love your userame
@@S0meb0dy825 thank you so much lmao
Hey, your video from the other day about becoming a gentle parent after not being one, made me cry. I’m 40 and my youngest is 14, so I’m really late in the game, but better late than never, right lol? Thanks for the lessons and daily inspiration to keep striving to be a better woman and mother. I hope you’re having a great day today.
I love your parenting skills..
This isn't terrible!!! I hated brushing my hair too! My mom took me to the salon and let me choose what Bob I wanted and it helped me realize what hair I wanted for the rest of my life and reduced the fights!!!!
Edit: 12 years later and it's still a happy shoulder leingth! Sometimes i wear extensions but ill always keep it chin-shoulder leingth!
When I was little I hated getting my hair brushed to the point of complete melt downs every day. My mom gave me the option to either get my hair cut short or to try and tolerate the brushing and I chose to get my hair cut. After that it was so easy to brush my hair that eventually I got used to it and ended up growing out my hair pretty long again. Nothing wrong with choosing the easy way, it's called the easy way for a reason lol
❤️. Also, that green/black is *chefs kiss*
Haha "Hey Cousin it! Wanna get your hair done?" I lost it.😂😂😂 I am laughing so hard I am crying! But i can relate with my crazy long, thick hair!
It’s so weird how people react to little girls with short hair! I loved having a short pixie for years and also had a daughter who hated having her hair handled. I made sure she was happy with the decision and only cut it about chin length and everyone “felt sorry for her”. I was like wtf she’s still cute and happy!
I'm 3 seconds in and YOU DO YOU! I was so tender-headed, yet could not brush my own hair well, that my mom did the same thing to save us both the pain and anxiety.
My mom did that same!! Said I couldn’t have long hair until I could take care of it. Now I can take care of it great.
I did this with my daughter. Too
We cut my 5 year old daughter’s hair short just a few weeks ago for this exact same reason! She is very independent and loves to be able to do her own hair, so she was totally on board when she knew she would be able to do it herself a lot easier!! ❤
Let me preface this by saying, if your child wanted this and is happy, I’m happy for y’all. My mom did this to me and I still resent her for it. My hair was down to my hips and she made me get a very short layered bob around 8yo. I didn’t even get to pick the haircut I got. I cried on the way there, the entire time in the chair, on the way home, and multiple times in the following weeks. I HATED IT. I could see if she was helping me wash, dry, style, etc. but she didn’t, just screamed at me to do it myself without teaching me first. If she did “help”, she was basically just pulling my hair the whole time. My hair to this day will not grow past the middle of my back. It upsets me so much.
I mean, it's not the same thing; her child was 2. I don't know about you, but my kids didn't have much opinions about their hair when they were 2... So it's the best moment to cut if off to teach them slowly how to tolerate the sensations when you brush it.
Also, the difference is there; your mom didn't seem to want to help you, but she did it to help her daughter learn.
@@sk22-12 I understand it’s not the same, that’s why I started by saying I’m happy for both of them if her child is happy. I wasn’t trying to say she forced this on her daughter or anything, just sharing what happened to me. The video just brought up my past experiences with my hair and I had to get it all out. No hate/anger towards anyone, was just in a rut at the time I originally commented. ♥️
@M I understand that. I replied to another comment clarifying the intent of my original comment wasn’t to say she forced this on her daughter or anything like that. This video just reminded me of my past experiences between my mom and my hair and I wanted to share some of that. I’m not projecting anything, just sharing my experience. As I said to the other commenter, no hate/anger towards anyone, just trying to clarify. 💜
@@hannahleigh6447 I'm sorry your mom put you throught a traumatizing experience :(
I'm sorry that your mother robbed you of your autonomy and was so unkind to you. Have you considered getting extensions to reach the length you want?
This is honestly lovely to see. I don’t have kids, but I have really thick hair for a white person and it was Merida levels of curly when I was a kid, and I’m autistic. Whenever my poor mother would try to brush my hair, neither of us really knew the best way to do it for my hair type and I would end up crying in pain a whole lot. Even as I got older I would despise brushing my hair because it hurt so much I’d snap at anyone who came to talk to me during it. Now I have much shorter hair as an adult and know how to start from the bottom, so it’s miles better
I had this happen to me older elementary age .. and I had an at the time "grandma" extremely short, because I didn't brush the back of my hair. I was traumatized because no one told me anything just suddenly all my hair was being chopped. COMPLETELY different situation.
My mom did this to me. I was 6 and never had my hair cut. I had beautiful long curly hair to my waist and my mom chopped it to my ears. My dad actually cried bc he was so upset about it and they were divorced so she didn't tell him beforehand. Now, I'm 35 and won't let my hair get cut above shoulder length.
Wishing I had a mom like you at that age. You're a champion.
I was 6-ish and had very thick, tangle-prone hair, wouldn't brush out my hair nor let mom do it even with an entire bottle of detangling spray. I initinally loved how easy it was to care for a pixie cut.
(*initially, as I kept being mistaken for a boy, especially when my tomboy phase started)
I personally had this exact same experience but at age 8 so it personally have affected me a lot because I was teased heavily and now I won’t have short hair and don’t feel comfortable cutting my hair.
I never understood why people assume hair length has anything to do with gender. (Not coming at you, coming at the people who misgendered you). I know so many older ladies with pixie cuts it’s insane. And I grew up with dudes who had long hair. Heck, long hair on men has been in fashion for a very, very long time, so why is a woman with short hair any different?
It’s all just silly lol
My daughter and I thank you for showing me how to be a better mum.
My husband has super thick, curly hair. Aka a tangle trap waiting to happen. Our son is almost 9 months old and has clearly inherited his father's hair. We've already agreed that the cute curls are not going to be worth the battle, if he doesn't want to sit still for me to brush his hair we're keeping it cut short until he's older.
For my curly hair my mom would distract me in the bath with toys cover my hair on conditioner and brush it while I played I still brush my hair in the shower to this day it’s much easier!
@@sherryyrs8660 oooh! I'll have to try that!
Same with my son. He inherited my hair. He's 24 now and can do whatever he wants with it!
Please, I am begging you, don’t try and brush curly hair dry. It is not worth it. Do what @Sherry Yrs suggested and get wet and covered in conditioner first. And I’m sure that you already know this, but curly hair does not need to be brushed daily, just brush his hair when you wash it. Also, congrats on becoming a parent!
@@elliee884 thank you! 😊 Glad I decided to post, I'm getting some great advice. I have super straight hair so I had no idea about any of this
OMG 😂 so true! Hilarious human right here! 😂
Gonna be honest, thats great parenting
Ironically, my parents did this with me. I hated hair brushing and baths so my mom asked me (5-6ish) if instead I wanted to cut my hair short. I agreed quickly and we were both happy. Now, 12 years later and manny hairstyles later, I'm almost back where I started, short Bob like hair cut.
“Not all at the same time.” Thank you for the reminder. ❤
A very VERY similar thing happened to my sister, she has a lot of sensory issues, so when she was little she hated how her hair felt on the back of her neck, and my mom let her cut it. Now she loves her hair and is growing it out to be really long, everything takes time 🙂