Dear Anxiety || Spoken Word

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  • Опубликовано: 23 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 11 тыс.

  • @ClaytonJennings
    @ClaytonJennings  4 года назад +3601

    I hope this helps someone out there. Love you all.
    All poems, vids and novels:
    www.ClaytonJennings.com
    Have I been able to help you? Support my channel here: app.moonclerk.com/pay/2qswhhel8db9
    Spotify: open.spotify.com/artist/3HM2KNmxuQ4SS3A3sI5Lez
    Apple Music: music.apple.com/us/artist/clayton-jennings/1494243865
    Amazon Music: tinyurl.com/y5u4hxc3
    Instagram: instagram.com/claytonjennings1/

  • @RushilJivan
    @RushilJivan 6 лет назад +18433

    Schools should really start talking about depression and anxiety, not only bullying because sometimes we bring ourselves down, not others.. 😕

    • @GreenJNR-GG
      @GreenJNR-GG 6 лет назад +150

      bullying caused my depression:(

    • @RushilJivan
      @RushilJivan 6 лет назад +62

      @@GreenJNR-GG You should report it to an elder :/

    • @GreenJNR-GG
      @GreenJNR-GG 6 лет назад +51

      Canny Kibbles no, i did before and it just made it worse, so i can’t do it again, but thanks

    • @RushilJivan
      @RushilJivan 6 лет назад +39

      @@GreenJNR-GG well if you want to talk to me on any social media, then just ask me. I'm willing to help :)

    • @botdog370
      @botdog370 6 лет назад +40

      Jag Most bullying is due to what happens at home. Abusive parents.

  • @minenhledlamini6495
    @minenhledlamini6495 6 лет назад +5297

    some ppl don't under depression and having anxiety when u try to look for help they say that you are seeking attention but deep down you are drowning, you really need their help not their judgments

    • @anxietycloutxz7928
      @anxietycloutxz7928 6 лет назад +11

      Minenhle Dlamini Fax Bro 🤧

    • @clintclore5717
      @clintclore5717 6 лет назад +17

      fact

    • @wildcatludlow5891
      @wildcatludlow5891 6 лет назад +70

      Today I felt like giving up, rocked back and forth hitting my head on the dresser, I laid on the floor with no pain no thoughts just the feeling of numbness, I laid in bed staring outside my window as tears run down my face thinking how I called into work and told them I had the flu but in reality I’m trying to live I’m fighting a battle that no one can see that no one is able to understand, I can’t move talk or even think I’m just numb and lost.

    • @bradallen9551
      @bradallen9551 6 лет назад +15

      Hey man, I'll pray for you, continue to have faith in God, he'll bring you through it stronger because of it.

    • @kassidyrichard1693
      @kassidyrichard1693 6 лет назад +14

      That’s exactly what it feels like, drowning.

  • @richardkicklighter7363
    @richardkicklighter7363 5 лет назад +1503

    The loneliest people are the KINDNESSES
    The saddest people are the BRIGHTEST
    Alll because they don't wish to see anyone else suffer the way they did

    • @GenZForGod
      @GenZForGod 4 года назад +16

      It's sad but true

    • @patricktedrow1976
      @patricktedrow1976 4 года назад +13

      Wow now that is the truest thing i have heard in many many years

    • @otakuplays937
      @otakuplays937 4 года назад +19

      And the most damaged people are the wisest. And trust me it isn’t easy going thru all this

    • @brandonbentz8610
      @brandonbentz8610 4 года назад +5

      hey you are right i suffer from deppression but i try to hold on

    • @mariep.3488
      @mariep.3488 4 года назад +10

      This hits home. I feel like the loneliest person on the planet. Where is the support when you need it most?

  • @bruceschildt6220
    @bruceschildt6220 Год назад +168

    I've turned back to God because of this video . Today is my first day giving up alcohol. I'm depending on Him to get me through this. Thanks man for this video, you're truly helping people ❤

    • @deihl97
      @deihl97 Год назад +3

      Amen! How is it going for you?

    • @lauraschmitz2427
      @lauraschmitz2427 Год назад +2

      Don’t give up no matter what, and even if you don’t succeed right away, don’t be afraid to try again I know many people who don’t always make it the first attempt! But you Can do this with Jesus on your side all you need to do is surrender to his will and walk with God hand-in-hand! Don’t ever forget how amazing you are in your father’s eyes and you don’t need any poison inside you to make you better. God made you perfectly how you are!

    • @RawrTilUsDeath
      @RawrTilUsDeath Год назад +2

      hows it going brother?

    • @Llewellyn-rv4rb
      @Llewellyn-rv4rb 9 месяцев назад +1

      May God be with you may he rescue you AMEN

    • @DanSteakMan
      @DanSteakMan 9 месяцев назад +1

      I think I'm trapped
      It sucks
      I walked back to thos environment
      I'm the one who ignored my gut
      Gods been here this whole time
      Why can't I love my self, as Jesus loves me?!
      I hate me
      Why?
      Only I can answer
      Unfortunately
      Help me Lord!

  • @Jenna-qz8ht
    @Jenna-qz8ht 5 лет назад +3413

    “I’m an actor who got really good at being on today” that hit deep

    • @UnsolvedMystery90
      @UnsolvedMystery90 5 лет назад +21

      Know that feeling all too well.

    • @Youngbloodz33
      @Youngbloodz33 5 лет назад +11

      I know right. And I felt that more than any other sentence in the whole song

    • @dahlia_moon1475
      @dahlia_moon1475 4 года назад +6

      I know right

    • @shantcheetah
      @shantcheetah 4 года назад +10

      i agree, that's a very powerful line :( to an extent we're all actors, we portray an image of ourselves to society so people can accept us

    • @Austin_schurer
      @Austin_schurer 4 года назад +2

      Jenna 98765 yeah that’s me 24/7 in school and outside

  • @timothystrik4658
    @timothystrik4658 6 лет назад +2538

    I wake up, puddle of sweat.
    I have nightmares and I get back into bed.
    It’s like these voices just keep playing on repeat in the back of my head.
    And I can’t keep them to leave me alone, thirty years old but still hates being alone when I’m home.
    Because that’s when the voices get the loudest.
    Opening up like this is a moment far from my proudest.
    But these demons keep pressing me, I swear to the foulest.
    But I’ve grown comfortable with their presence, my conscious is coulees.
    My dreams are their playground, my thoughts are their palace.
    I’ve tried to evict them, they returned with more.
    Anxiety isn’t an item you can return at the store.
    I was ten the first time I had an panic attack.
    Like a punch to the stomach there is no planning for that.
    And I didn’t tell anyone because I was too scared about what they’d say.
    And I know deep down there was nothing they could do to take it away.
    It was my fight to fight and my battle to face.
    I remember that house I grew up in an how these demons would rattle that place.
    I’d lay awake at night staring at the ceiling.
    I’ve spend my whole life trying to run from that feeling.
    That feeling of being lonely, that feeling of being lost, that feeling of being lost when the lights turn off.
    That feeling of being depressed, that feeling of being anxious.
    The feeling of screaming to god begging him to take this.
    Only to get silence in return.
    I’d lay In that bed crying and I toss and I turn.
    And I turn and I toss till this day.
    The doctors gave me medication, the pastor said pray.
    I tried both and this anxiety still hasn’t gone away.
    So forgive me if I fantasize about being gone today.
    I’m an actor who got really good at being on today.
    But when I turn off I go right back into the shadows.
    I’m at the deep end now but I started in the shallows.
    And I might just drown myself in these waves.
    So burn me in hell, these homes are all graves.
    Everyone is coping with something but won’t admit that they all too afraid.
    And these kids are glued to watching me, what do I say.
    If I’m honest with them, maybe they wont think highly of me.
    Everything they want me to be is what I’m dying to be.
    But everything I really am, is what I’m not trying to be.
    I want them to know they not alone In their struggles.
    I wake up in tears and fall back asleep in those puddles.
    And I don’t think I’ll ever get out of this valley.
    I’m in terrified that all along god is telling my sins.
    And if he has the number must be astronomic.
    My life is a joke and you keep reading just past the comic.
    Because everything you think that I am is far from the truth.
    I wish I could open up to you and just let loose.
    But my vocal cords get thight when the devil pulls on this news.
    And then I’m back at keeping everything bottled up inside.
    But he’s not gonna keep me from pulling the throttle back this time.
    He’s not gonna keep me trapped like this.
    I can’t get out of bed, I was never meant to act like this.
    I’m packing up my backs and he can’t stop me from running fast like this.
    I’m not gonna be a slave to these voices of anxiety.
    I’m showing the devil back for every time that he lied to me.
    And I’m taking a belt to this demons who whisper to spear my ear.
    And I’m ignoring every nay-sayer who stands and stares when I’m near.
    I’m moving forward out of this slum.
    I took my bruises I took my lumps.
    I felt down but I got right back up.
    So give me a torch and just light that up.
    I’m sending fire to the devil and I’m dousing these demons in gasoline.
    Look at you now.
    Now you not laughing at me.
    Now who’s the one being tortured and plunked.
    Now who’s the one closing every door that I want.
    Now who’s the one watching the other burn to the ground.
    Don’t look away from me, you better turn back around.
    I’m not done talking to you now.
    I’m watching you moves.
    I’m on your back and I’m stalking you too.
    And when you try to ruin some other kids life I’ll be stopping you too.
    You took thirty years of my life, and I can’t get that back.
    You told me to end my life and I nearly got killed for that.
    You took me down but I bounced right back.
    I was lost then but I got found like that.
    Everything you told me I wasn’t, someone new told me I was.
    And everything you hated in me, someone new told me he loved.
    And when you tried to kill me with depression and anxiety.
    He reached in and placed hope deep inside of me.
    So I’m done listening to you and let you control me.
    I’m announcing now that the devil can’t hold me.
    I’m walking away from the old me, and I’m demanding a refund on every lie that you sold me.
    You knew I would find a way out sooner or later.
    And I found my escape in the form of a savior.

  • @cherryberrylicious89
    @cherryberrylicious89 5 лет назад +5292

    The happiest of people are usually the saddest.

    • @AA-bk1jr
      @AA-bk1jr 5 лет назад +92

      Welcome to my life 🙁

    • @probablypikit
      @probablypikit 5 лет назад +81

      God dang exactly, everyone thinks I’m always say I’m a super happy kid but little do they know

    • @miavasquez2556
      @miavasquez2556 5 лет назад +69

      This is so true when I’m with my friends in the happiest one in the group but when I get home I just let it out and when I look in the mirror I cry more because I’m so insecure about my body but I’m slowly liking my body more everyday

    • @tinyc6334
      @tinyc6334 5 лет назад +21

      NOT TRUE 🤣😂🤣

    • @probablypikit
      @probablypikit 5 лет назад +15

      Yeah it is

  • @Brayden____ogier
    @Brayden____ogier Год назад +188

    It’s crazy how much I come back to this 😢 this is so relatable

    • @cathrinenyasha6621
      @cathrinenyasha6621 Год назад +1

      Me too😢

    • @craigmoore3207
      @craigmoore3207 9 месяцев назад

      I first found this song about a month back and I listen to it numerous times a day I have diffrent accounts on my fire stick laptop an phone an on all 3 it’s at the top the words are so relatable it’s scary

  • @iriakerwin8894
    @iriakerwin8894 5 лет назад +1077

    It’s scary how a smile and a “just tired” can get people to think your fine...
    I’m not I don’t think I ever will be fine but as far as you know and care I am, as long as I’m doing fine I’m school and am not bothering anyone, I’m okay, no matter how much I’m struggling..
    To those reading in the comments I know why your here you feel like your giving up, your scared and have no one to go to but someday things may get better we will find someone to help us, maybe one day we’ll actually be fine...
    Edit: I never even knew about the reply’s and likes, for one I’m so sorry to everyone who can relate to what I was and still do feel from time to time. I wish I could take that away. But I’m here to tell you it does get easier, as cliche as it sounds, I know it does, it does, maybe not entirely, I’m still waiting for that but those moments when we wish we could smile and genuinely mean it, they do come, and I won’t lie saying that there won’t be bad days, because unfortunately there always will be. I’m simply here to say, just wait, there’s so many things to look forward to, that one song that you’ll cherish forever. The movie you’ll have on repeat. The memories of watching sunsets. The RUclips videos you’ll never get to see. The books you’ll never get to read. The people you’ll never get to meet.
    You will meet people who will accept you for everything you are, and when you do, it will be magical you just need to be there to see it. We both do, so please hold on, let’s take a trip, till the shampoo and conditioner run out at the same time, we’ve already made it to the moon. It was hard I know, but how about we go to Pluto it must be so lonely out there, we’ll make it together. How does that sound. Please hold one, so we can both have those good days, where we can really smile.

    • @jersher7122
      @jersher7122 5 лет назад +8

      if you every need someone to talk to, hit me up, no bullshit

    • @cj22947
      @cj22947 5 лет назад +11

      My friends say "I'm a master of hiding my emotions" They have never seen me cry, never seen me ask for help no matter how I really feel, nobody really knows me. Not even myself.

    • @CH4RL1S1O
      @CH4RL1S1O 5 лет назад +10

      No one ever listens to me. They ask if I'm okay and I just nod and they walk off. But I'm not.
      And sometimes I don't want to talk. I just want a hug. Someone to let me know they care. But all I get is a 'Why are you so quiet?'
      Even my girlfriend just says that. And my parents don't really care. My mum doesn't accept me, hasn't since I came out. My dad... if I try to talk he just yells.
      I can only talk to people online. But that only helps a little.

    • @escryptid6982
      @escryptid6982 5 лет назад +1

      Charli I can’t relate to everything but I can relate to the first part, and it hurts, it hurts a lot ,but I gotta stay strong, and I can’t let any one irl know I’m weak, so I’ll just stay quiet.🙂

    • @SoggyToast506
      @SoggyToast506 5 лет назад +5

      It’s harder for guys and today with society, guys are more scared to express their feelings and ask for help, less males are diagnosed with depression Because they are scared to get help. And we keep to ourselves and so we commit suicide. Because no one cares about males society doesn’t care about males.

  • @GBCuddLe
    @GBCuddLe 5 лет назад +1281

    2.5 million views but only 486k subscribers. You're helping more people than you know, Clayton. Thank you.

    • @motte8810
      @motte8810 5 лет назад +1

      :4

    • @sheenacarlisle4875
      @sheenacarlisle4875 5 лет назад +1

      Amen

    • @adamcarabello6327
      @adamcarabello6327 5 лет назад +3

      so true... You are amazing Clayton... I dont need a perfect person to tell me how to better. Its through the people who struggle and get through the fire that I follow.

    • @AngelKissedBy2
      @AngelKissedBy2 5 лет назад

      @@adamcarabello6327 Amen 💯🙇❤

    • @chevelynjozefzoon
      @chevelynjozefzoon 4 года назад

      That is so true

  • @justinknitter6057
    @justinknitter6057 5 лет назад +1363

    Dear Anxiety/Spoken Word
    I wake up, puddle of sweat, I have nightmares and I get back into bed. It’s like these voices just keep playing on repeat in the back of my head and I can’t get them to leave me alone. 30 years old but still hates being alone when I’m home. Because that’s when the voices get the loudest. Opening up like this is a moment far from my proudest, but these demons keep pressing me, I swear their the foulest. But I’ve grown comfortable with their presence, my conscious is calloused, my dreams are their playground my thoughts are their palace. I tried to evict them, they return with more. Anxiety isn’t an item you can return at the store. I was 10 the first time I had a panic attack, like a punch to the stomach, there’s no planning for that. and I didn’t tell anyone because I was too scared about what they’d say and I know deep down there was nothing they could do to take it away. It was my fight to fight, and my battle to face. I remember that house I grew up in and how those demons would rattle that place. I’d lay in my bed awake at night just starring at the ceiling. I’ve spent my whole life trying to run from that feeling; that feeling of being lonely, that feeling of being lost, that feeling of being sick when the lights turn off, that feeling of being depressed, that feeling of being anxious, that feeling of screaming to god begging him to take this, only to get silence in return.
    I lay in that bed crying and I’d toss and I’d turn, and I turn and toss till this day. The doctors gave me medication, the pastor said pray. I’ve tried both and this anxiety still hasn’t gone away. So forgive me if I fantasize about being gone today, I’m an actor who got really good at being on today, but when I turn off I go right back into the shadows. I’m in the deep end now, but I started in the shallows. And I might just drown myself in these waves. Suburban hell these homes are all graves, everyone’s coping with something but won’t admit it their all too afraid, and these kids are glued to watching me, what do I say? If I’m honest maybe they wont think highly of me. Everything they want me to be, is what I’m dying to be. But everything I really am is what I’m not trying to be.
    I want them to know they are not alone in their struggles. I wake up in tears and fall back asleep in those puddles. and I don’t think I’ll ever get out of this valley I’m in, terrified that all along god has tallied my sins, and if he has, the number must be astronomic. My life is a joke, and you keep reading, just pass the comic, Because everything you think that I am is far from the truth. I wish I could open up to you and just let loose, but my vocal cords get tight when the devil pulls on this noose and then I’m back to keeping everything bottled up inside. But he’s not gonna keep me from pulling the throttle back this time. He’s not gonna keep me trapped like this. I can’t get outta bed, I was never made to act like this. I’m packing up my bags and he can’t stop me from running fast like this. I’m not gonna be a slave to these voices of anxiety. I’m shoving the devil back for every time that he lied to me, and taking a belt to these demons who whispered despair in my ear, and I’m ignoring everyone neigh sayer who stands and stares when I’m near. I’m moving forward out of this slump; I took my bruises, I took my lumps. I fell down but I got right back up, so give me a torch and lets light that up. I’m setting fire to the devil and I’m dousing these demons in gasoline.
    Look at you, now you’re not laughing at me, now who’s the one who’s being tortured and punked. Now who’s the one closing every door that I want, now who’s the one watching the other burn to the ground. Don’t look away from me, you better turn back around! I’m not done talking to you! Now I’m watching your moves, I’m on your back and I’m stalking you to, and when you try to ruin some other kids life, I’ll be stopping you too. You took 30 years of my life, and I can’t get that back, you told me to end my life, and I nearly got killed for that! You took me down but I bounced right back. I was lost then I got found like that. And everything you told me I wasn’t, someone new told me i was and everything you hated in me someone new told me he loves. And when you tried to kill me with depression and anxiety, he reached in and placed hope deep inside of me. So I’m done listening to you and letting you control me, I'm announcing it now that the devil can’t hold me, I’m walking away from the old me and I’m demanding a refund on every lie that you sold me. You knew I’d find a way out sooner or later. And I found my escape in the form of a savior.
    ~Clayton Jennings

    • @Thehairdon_
      @Thehairdon_ 5 лет назад +10

      J Knitter can u like copy and send this to me

    • @CharlotteButton
      @CharlotteButton 5 лет назад +5

      J Knitter ❤️

    • @Madnes813
      @Madnes813 5 лет назад +22

      There's a couple mistakes in here, but nice either way

    • @delmusic397
      @delmusic397 5 лет назад +10

      J Knitter wow hit hard reading that

    • @wethetrends6869
      @wethetrends6869 5 лет назад +6

      Thanks!

  • @MrShadow-qz9xj
    @MrShadow-qz9xj 9 месяцев назад +22

    The message in this is the ending, so many times people that deal with anxiety have so much they want/need to say. In private we feel strong, and talk our selves up. Then when we come face to face with it, we just can not bring ourselves to say it. Anxiety took 40 years of my life away. I am more free now then i ever have been. That said it is still a choice i have to keep making. Those voices are still there still putting me down, but i keep reminding myself of how good it feels.

  • @quynciefaulkner6844
    @quynciefaulkner6844 5 лет назад +3136

    mom- whats the matter
    me- *smiles* nothing
    *thinking* don't cry, don't cry

    • @Convoluted-and-Exiled
      @Convoluted-and-Exiled 5 лет назад +69

      ...Yes. So many days I have told myself this. The struggle is real...*big hug*

    • @costacheianis693
      @costacheianis693 5 лет назад +5

      Ohh,yeah ..

    • @domvillarreal01
      @domvillarreal01 5 лет назад +41

      The thing is my mom knows what i go through but I still lie and say nothing

    • @lolitalo7793
      @lolitalo7793 5 лет назад +22

      Me every day.. but My mom is not her to ask me this.. so sometimes my mind just do and I start crying..

    • @kayleyhuebner4231
      @kayleyhuebner4231 5 лет назад +8

      Only like 5 words buh so much meaning and so true

  • @renesolis2169
    @renesolis2169 3 года назад +928

    “The doctors gave me medication and the pastors said pray I tried both and this anxiety still hasn’t gone away so forgive me if I fantasize about being gone today.” Felt this heavy

    • @MrBlodhund
      @MrBlodhund 3 года назад +2

      Have you tried to meditate? It’s truly amazing, it might take a couple of weeks and it’s worth it, often it takes a lot quicker then that

    • @renesolis2169
      @renesolis2169 3 года назад +6

      @@MrBlodhund i tried for like 3-5 days felt nothing and stopped but thanks I’ll try again and give it a few weeks see if it helps 🙏🏼

    • @MrBlodhund
      @MrBlodhund 3 года назад +1

      @@renesolis2169 keep it up, try it daily for 2 months atleast I promise you will feel better, how long have the sessions been? :)

    • @mikedismuke4031
      @mikedismuke4031 3 года назад +7

      @@MrBlodhund Meditation? How does it work? I mean what do I do to meditate? I'm willing to try anything at this point medicine, drugs has little effect on my anxiety.

    • @nobody_425
      @nobody_425 3 года назад +1

      On my soul 💔

  • @potatoes3872
    @potatoes3872 5 лет назад +1492

    " anxiety is not an item that can return at the store "

    • @BG-wc7kb
      @BG-wc7kb 4 года назад +2

      ivory claraa I kinda wish it was not that I have anxiety

    • @itzbarney532
      @itzbarney532 4 года назад +1

      Yes we watched the video too

    • @Raynbow402
      @Raynbow402 4 года назад +2

      I didn't realize I had PTSD I thought it was anxiety

    • @edsports3776
      @edsports3776 4 года назад

      Raynbow402 sorry man thats rough

    • @kay_imvu8609
      @kay_imvu8609 3 года назад

      💯

  • @TheMenace9891
    @TheMenace9891 3 месяца назад +7

    Almost 35 and this song still hits so hard I have to fight back the tears.I greatly appreciate your music and pray anyone who listens to this will get everything they deserve out of this life.

  • @soultaker8642
    @soultaker8642 4 года назад +1263

    The ending really hits cuz thats what everyone says when their asked "are u ok" "yeah I'm fine"

    • @alexs6746
      @alexs6746 3 года назад +60

      When people ask if I’m ok I answer I’m fine because I don’t want my depression to drag them down with me, if I go down I’m going down alone

    • @alixander3129
      @alixander3129 3 года назад +10

      @@alexs6746 I feel that. But I also target myself when I have problems with the people who have been around for a long time. I have been working through a lot of my demons and I managed to get thru this year.

    • @seanferguson2040
      @seanferguson2040 3 года назад

      You are not fine you want more figure out a wand and let us all know no 60 words per mintute buffit..

    • @lileroselausii4421
      @lileroselausii4421 3 года назад +3

      @@alexs6746 ur never alone even doe u might not know it xx

    • @Kwobler
      @Kwobler 3 года назад +13

      Definition of fine. Fucked up. Insecure. Nurotic. Emotional. I suffer from alot of mental disorders. But for the grace of a Higher Power today I can face my issues and recover. It's a slow hard process but there really is light at the end. Just reach out and ask for help. You will be surprised how many people can relate to you. Your never truly alone. Plz people don't give up. I love everyone of you who struggle. Your stronger then you think. There is HOPE. Hold On Pain Ends. Xoxo

  • @hulamcflyer4972
    @hulamcflyer4972 5 лет назад +5177

    He needs to collab with NF

  • @mattfunk9652
    @mattfunk9652 2 года назад +650

    Man... When he says, "I'm good thank you" and walks out.... That was perfectly depicted with how anxiety is.. Everything he wanted too and needed to say... But instead chose to bottle it all up because he felt he didn't have a choice.. anxiety PERFECTLY explained.

    • @heathj2007
      @heathj2007 Год назад +12

      Yessss good catch.

    • @ConnorMurphy-yg4qo
      @ConnorMurphy-yg4qo Год назад +10

      True although go home and naturally replay the moment in multiple ways just to prove to our selves we could do it

    • @daybreaker7052
      @daybreaker7052 Год назад +9

      I agree with this but I also think that this spoke on how anxiety is your own battle that you alone must face. He had nothing to say because he won his own battle.

    • @rylandeyapp1023
      @rylandeyapp1023 Год назад +1

      Absolutely facts 💯

    • @took995
      @took995 Год назад +1

      This is absolutely true, I've listened to this and listened to this repeatedly for years now, and that's the part that just breaks me every time. It's so real

  • @JohannaBarnard-sl4jb
    @JohannaBarnard-sl4jb 6 месяцев назад +1001

    Whose here with me 2024 ?.

  • @Deskilljoy
    @Deskilljoy 6 лет назад +2137

    NF and you should really do something together!

  • @serenityedwards4680
    @serenityedwards4680 5 лет назад +461

    I’m an actor that got really good at being on today. That, that’s the truth for so many of us

  • @octanemain7627
    @octanemain7627 4 года назад +732

    I wake up, puddle of sweat
    I have nightmares, and I get back into bed
    It's like these voices just keep playing on repeat in the back of my head
    And I can’t get them to leave me alone
    Thirty-years old but still hates being alone when I'm home
    Because that's when the voices get the loudest
    Opening up like this is a moment far from my proudest
    But these demons keep pressin’ me, I swear they're the foulest
    But I've grown comfortable with their presence, my conscious is calloused
    My dreams are their playground, my thoughts are their palace
    I tried to evict them, they returned with more
    Anxiety isn't an item you can return at the store
    I was 10 the first time I had a panic attack
    Like a punch to the stomach, there's no planning for that
    And I didn't tell anyone because I was too scared about what they'd say
    And I knew deep down that there was nothing they could do to take it away
    It was my fight to fight and my battle to face
    I remember that house I grew up in and how those demons would rattle that place
    I'd lay awake at night just staring at the ceiling
    I’ve spent my whole life trying to run from that feeling
    That feeling of being lonely, that feeling of being lost
    That feeling of being sick when the lights turn off
    That feeling of being depressed, that feeling of being anxious
    That feeling of screaming to God begging Him to take this
    Only to get silence in return
    I’d lay in that bed crying, and I'd toss and I’d turn
    And I turn and I toss to this day
    The doctors gave me medication, the pastor said pray
    I tried both, and this anxiety still hasn't gone away
    So forgive me if I fantasize about being gone today
    I'm an actor who got really good at being on today
    But when I turn off, I go right back into the shadows
    I'm in the deep-end now, but I started in the shallows
    And I might just drown myself in these waves
    Suburbian hell, these homes are all graves
    Everyone’s coping with something but won't admit it, they're all too afraid
    And these kids are glued to watching me, what do I say?
    If I'm honest with them, maybe they won't think highly of me
    Everything they want me to be is what I'm dying to be
    But everything I really am is what I'm not trying to be
    I want them to know that they're not alone in their struggles
    I wake up in tears and fall back asleep in those puddles
    And I don't ever think I'll get out of this valley I'm in
    Terrified that all along God has tallied my sins
    And if He has, the number must be astronomic
    My life is a joke, and you keep reading, just pass the comic
    Because everything you think that I am is far from the truth
    I wish I could open up to you and just let loose
    But my vocal cords get tight when the Devil pulls on this noose
    And then I'm back to keeping everything bottled up inside
    But he's not gonna keep me from pulling the throttle back this time
    He's not gonna keep me trapped like this
    I can't get out of bed, I was never made to act like this
    I'm packing up my bags, and he can't stop me from running fast like this
    I'm not gonna be a slave to these voices of anxiety
    I'm shoving the Devil back for every time that he lied to me
    And I'm taking a belt to these demons who whisper despair in my ear
    And I'm ignoring every naysayer who stands and stares when I'm near
    I'm moving forward out of this slump
    I took my bruises, I took my lumps
    I fell down, but I got right back up
    So give me a torch, and let's light that up
    I'm setting fire to the Devil, and I'm dousing these demons in gasoline
    Look at you now, now you're not laughing at me
    Now who's the one who's being tortured and punked?
    Now who's the one closing every door that I want?
    Now who's the one watching the other burn the ground?
    Don't look away from me, you better turn back around
    I'm not done talking to you now
    I'm watching your moves
    I'm on your back, and I'm stalking you, too
    And when you try to ruin some other kid's life, I'll be stoppin' you, too
    You took thirty years of my life, and I can't get that back
    You told me to end my life, and I nearly got killed for that
    You took me down, but I bounced right back
    I was lost then, and I got found like that
    And everything you told me I wasn't someone new told me I was
    And everything you hated in me someone new told me He loves
    And when you tried to kill me with depression and anxiety
    He reached in and placed hope deep inside of me
    So I'm done listening to you and letting you control me
    I'm announcing it now that the Devil can't hold me
    I'm walking away from the old me
    And I'm demanding a refund on every lie that you sold me
    You knew I'd find a way out sooner or later
    And I found my escape in the form of a Savior

    • @dontagreeterms
      @dontagreeterms 4 года назад +11

      Cant stop watching this

    • @gabrieldeal4434
      @gabrieldeal4434 4 года назад +7

      Can you send me these lyrics?

    • @grace5773
      @grace5773 4 года назад +1

      Gabriel Deal bby I can send you them on insta? :)

    • @corneliusc.campbell9695
      @corneliusc.campbell9695 4 года назад +4

      Thank you soo much..for sharing

    • @zahranjoki8201
      @zahranjoki8201 4 года назад +5

      Every word is everything I go through every minute of my life

  • @joshuapankhurst627
    @joshuapankhurst627 Год назад +54

    I'm 29 and I stutter. I can out work, out smart anyone in my career. Every time I hear this, I break down crying 20-30 seconds in. Religions not my cup of tea, but the message hits hard.

    • @AaronKurtzCoach
      @AaronKurtzCoach Год назад +1

      I can relate man. Be well

    • @duxvoid2437
      @duxvoid2437 Год назад +4

      Jesus will save you man ask him for guidance 🙏

    • @Patrick-ru4ur
      @Patrick-ru4ur 9 месяцев назад +3

      That's because religion is for people who are scared of going to hell, but spirituality is for people who have been there. You don't need religion to have faith. God loves you, and I love you

  • @brookepodeiko1681
    @brookepodeiko1681 4 года назад +388

    That is a perfect line: You told me to end my life and I nearly got killed for that. I love the end of this, it's a perfect rendition of anxiety.....all he said was in his head and anyone with anxiety knows that this is exactly how it works

    • @caitm8209
      @caitm8209 3 года назад +2

      yes

    • @jjbaglazer_
      @jjbaglazer_ 3 года назад +4

      I can’t even contemplate how many times I thought about killing myself while having my anxiety attacks but I have to be strong. I know there’s no wave that I can’t conquer 😊

    • @lexilexi2109
      @lexilexi2109 3 года назад +4

      I say stuff in my head it always comes out with something different or nothing I’m to scared

  • @mattboyles3590
    @mattboyles3590 2 года назад +677

    My favorite part of this video is the end where he actually didn’t say anything. That’s what really happens. We stay silent. We’re afraid. It’s scary to be vulnerable, but vulnerability brings strength

    • @unknwnmystery
      @unknwnmystery 2 года назад +11

      It also hurts to be vulnerable, that type of fear, that strong of anxiety can make you feel physically sick

    • @Classie19
      @Classie19 2 года назад +5

      That part kills me

    • @mattboyles3590
      @mattboyles3590 2 года назад +2

      And Clayton Jennings has been silent on social media for over a year now. I wonder what’s going on with him

    • @LadyJollyRoger
      @LadyJollyRoger 2 года назад +1

      @@mattboyles3590 I wonder too. I often look for posts from him but I haven’t seen anything 🙏🏼💙🙏🏼

    • @sharlenecrosswell3307
      @sharlenecrosswell3307 2 года назад +4

      Yep very symbolic!! Screaming inside have so much to say but just can't bring g oneself to do it. You can see how much he needs to though aye

  • @Prbella05
    @Prbella05 6 лет назад +724

    I cried! I suffer from anxiety every day is a battle. Thank you Clayton for your beautiful powerful poetry. God bless you 🙏

    • @camillechavez4596
      @camillechavez4596 6 лет назад +5

      Me too thank you Clayton

    • @jasonmiller8965
      @jasonmiller8965 6 лет назад +5

      Don't give up

    • @FR-SUNBM
      @FR-SUNBM 6 лет назад +4

      I do too Prbella05, keep fighting!

    • @Prbella05
      @Prbella05 6 лет назад +3

      @@FR-SUNBM You too. I will pray for us🙏

    • @Prbella05
      @Prbella05 6 лет назад +1

      @@jasonmiller8965 Thank you I wont🙏

  • @kageohara6771
    @kageohara6771 Год назад +3

    I rememeber so vividly finding this around when it came out at one of my lowest points, and hearing every word perfectly describing every single feeling in my body and every single feeling piled on top of me. I remember laying in my bed and just listening because I was so exhausted to even keep my eyes open to watch the video. These videos and these words saved me, they gave me the break I needed and something to hear. It kept me from simply giving into myself and letting it all drown me. I dont think Id be where I am, working and moving forward if these words weren't spoken. I may not have the same beliefs, but I was saved in a way. Coming back to this, it makes me feel stronger years later. Thank you

  • @carolinaharti9182
    @carolinaharti9182 4 года назад +1219

    The NF of Spoken Word

  • @kamilabenitez1735
    @kamilabenitez1735 5 лет назад +147

    I just want to hug him to show him he's not alone 😢💔.

  • @stokie1035
    @stokie1035 3 года назад +697

    wake up, puddle of sweat
    I have nightmares when I get back into bed
    It's like these voices just keep playing on repeat
    In the back of my head
    And I can't get them to leave me alone
    30 years old but still hates being alone when I'm home
    Because that's when the voices get the loudest
    Opening up like this is a moment far from my proudest
    But these demons keep pressing me
    I swear they're the foulest
    But I've grown comfortable with their presence
    My conscious is calloused
    My dreams are their playground
    My thoughts are their palace
    I try to evict them, they return with more
    Anxiety isn't an item you can return at the store
    I was ten the first time I had a panic attack
    Like a punch to the stomach, there's no planning for that
    And I didn't tell anyone
    Because I was too scared about what they'd say
    And I know deep down there was nothing
    They could do to take it away
    It was my fight to fight and my battle to face
    I remember that house I grew up in
    And how those demons would rattle that place
    I'd lay awake at night just staring at the ceiling
    I've spent my whole life trying to run away from that feeling
    That feeling of being lonely
    That feeling of being lost
    That feeling of being sick when the lights turn off
    That feeling of being depressed
    That feeling of being anxious
    That feeling of screaming to God
    Begging him to take this
    Only to get silence in return
    I'd lay in that bed crying and I'd toss and I'd turn
    And I turn and I toss to this day
    The doctors gave me medication, the pastor said pray
    I tried both and this anxiety still hasn't gone away
    So forgive me if I fantasise about being gone today
    I'm an actor who got really good at being on today
    But when I turn off I go right back into the shadows
    I'm in the deep end now but I started in the shallows
    And I might just drown myself in these waves
    Suburban hell, these homes are all graves
    Everyone's coping with something but won't admit it
    They're all too afraid
    And these kids are glued to watching me what do I say?
    If I'm honest with them maybe they won't think highly of me
    Everything they want me to be is what I'm dying to be
    But everything I really am is what I'm not trying to be
    I want them to know that they're not alone in their struggles
    I wake up in tears and fall back asleep in those puddles
    And I don't think I'll ever get out of this valley I'm in
    Terrified that all along God has tallied my sins
    And if he has the number must be astronomic
    My life is a joke and you keep reading
    Just pass the comic
    Because everything you think that I am is far from the truth
    I wish I could open up to you and just let loose
    But my vocal cords get tight when the devil pulls on this noose
    And them I'm back to keeping everything bottled up inside
    But he's not going to keep me from pulling
    The throttle back this time
    He's not going to keep me trapped like this
    I can't get out of bed I was never meant to act like this
    I packin' up my bags and he can't stop me
    From running fast like this
    I'm not going to be a slave to these voices of anxiety
    I'm shoving the devil back for every time that he lied to me
    And I'm taking a bell to these demons
    Who whispered despair in my ear
    And I'm ignoring every naysayer
    Who stands and stares when I'm near
    I'm moving forward out of this slump
    I took my bruises, I took my lumps
    I fell down but I got right back up
    So give me a torch and lets light that up
    I'm setting fire to the devil and
    I'm dousing these demons in gasoline
    Look at you now, now you're not laughing at me
    Now whose the one whose being tortured and poked
    Now whose the one closing every door that I want
    Now whose the one watching the other burn to the ground
    Don't look away from me you better turn back around
    I'm not done talking to you now
    I'm watching your moves, I'm on your back
    And I'm stalking you too
    And when you try to ruin some other kid's life
    I'll be stopping you too
    You took thirty years of my life and I can't get that back
    You told me to end my life and I nearly got killed for that
    You took me down but I bounced right back
    I was lost and I got found like that
    And everything you told me I wasn't
    Someone new told me I was
    And everything you hated in me
    Someone new told me He loves
    And when you tried to kill me with depression and anxiety
    He reached in and placed hope deep inside of me
    So I'm done listening to you and letting you control me
    I'm announcing it now that the devil can't hold me
    I'm walking away from the old me
    And I'm demanding a refund on every lie that you sold me
    You knew I'd find a way out sooner or later
    And I found my escape in the form of a saviour

  • @pastornick2073
    @pastornick2073 4 месяца назад +4

    Thank you for this, I’ve struggled with anxiety since being a child and now in my 40’s. It took a lot to finally admit to others that I had a problem, but Thanks be to God who helped me and you . Thank you again for the words in this and you being on the frontline. I pray that the Lord keeps you in His hands.

  • @6luealreadydead
    @6luealreadydead 4 года назад +2773

    Who else wants to tell him "Thank u for making this"? 👍🏼👍🏼💯💯🔥🔥💙💙💙

    • @chelleowen5777
      @chelleowen5777 4 года назад +3

      Yes

    • @crystalwilcher1203
      @crystalwilcher1203 4 года назад +28

      People dont see this as reality. People seem to think you can get "just out of your head"

    • @fadedsparrowvlogs7186
      @fadedsparrowvlogs7186 4 года назад +6

      This is freaking amazing

    • @minijeff5300
      @minijeff5300 4 года назад +2

      Fr

    • @wardaddy4116
      @wardaddy4116 4 года назад +15

      Preach brother!!!! This song has helped me so much! I’m fight depression and anxiety and this songs raises the hair on my arms!!!

  • @adilnassiry2260
    @adilnassiry2260 5 лет назад +441

    Everyone who fights depression and anxiety like me , We are a huge Family and we can get through this together. NEVER GIVE UP

    • @cockerspaniel9466
      @cockerspaniel9466 5 лет назад

      adil Nassiry I love you

    • @franklockman5877
      @franklockman5877 5 лет назад +9

      Just got out of the hospital yesterday I've spent half my life in therapy and still suffer anxiety and PTSD please pray for me!!

    • @emmapointon8935
      @emmapointon8935 5 лет назад +1

      @@cockerspaniel9466 A family is something not everyone gets to have so many people suffer alone because they can't trust their relitaves so how can they trust someone they don't know

    • @4amcuriosity162
      @4amcuriosity162 5 лет назад

      @@franklockman5877 youre not alone. Ptsd ruined my life for years and no one ever understood.

    • @emilykrafve7502
      @emilykrafve7502 5 лет назад

      be what if you wanna give up?

  • @ginak0367
    @ginak0367 6 лет назад +450

    I am afraid of many people, I don't want anyone to judge me how I dressed, how I speak, how I behave, how my friends won't take me seriously, they think I am boring, they think I am shy but the truth is that :
    I am afraid and I want someone to notice anyone?

    • @motolazer1
      @motolazer1 6 лет назад +4

      Hey i noticed. Whats up, wanna talk about it?

    • @ginak0367
      @ginak0367 6 лет назад +1

      Thank you for noticing I appreciate it!

    • @minenhledlamini6495
      @minenhledlamini6495 6 лет назад +3

      me too sumtyms I feel like running away I feel worthless

    • @minenhledlamini6495
      @minenhledlamini6495 6 лет назад +2

      God has notice you please seek him more you will find Him I promise

    • @JA-il3kd
      @JA-il3kd 6 лет назад +2

      Godbless :) I'll pray for you

  • @dwellcome
    @dwellcome Год назад +10

    Oh man… this hits hard. It’s so hard to express the feelings, the pain, that comes along with depression. It’s so much more than just being sad…

  • @phantomgaming5645
    @phantomgaming5645 3 года назад +1478

    He just explained my whole life in 6 mins

  • @EricChamplin
    @EricChamplin 6 лет назад +338

    As someone who struggles with generalized anxiety disorder and clinical depression, this was one of the most powerful videos I've seen in a long, long time. Thank you.

    • @bobbymulv5660
      @bobbymulv5660 6 лет назад +7

      You make so much sense and Clayton ik I’m a loser I’ve all most ended my self I’m bullied all the time but u can always talk to me

    • @archeng2764
      @archeng2764 6 лет назад

      Watch "Jesus over Depression". Its the same guy but i feel is more powerful than this.

    • @jennellasmr5079
      @jennellasmr5079 6 лет назад +1

      I also suffer from both.. my anxiaty is crippling .. I never leave the house.. I can't stand being around any1 other than my fiance

  • @markh12405
    @markh12405 6 лет назад +334

    Dear Anxiety/ Spoken Word
    I wake up in a puddle of sweat, I have nightmares and I get back into bed, its like these voices just keep playing on repeat in the back of my head and I can't get them to leave me alone. 30 years old but still hates being alone when I'm home, Because thats when the voices get the loudest. Opening up like this is a moment far from my proudest, but these demons keep pressing me I swear their the foulest. But ive grown comfortable with their presence my conscious is callist, my dreams are their playground my thoughts are their palace. I tried to evict them they return with more, anxiety isnt a item you can return at a store. I was 10 the first time I had a panic attack, like a punch to the stomach there's no planning for that. I didnt tell anyone because I was to scared about what they'd say and I knew deep down there was nothing that could take it away. It was my fight to fight and my battle to face. I remember that house I grew up in and how these demons would rattle that place. I'd lay awake at night just staring at the ceiling. I've spent my whole life trying to run from that feeling, that feeling of being lonely that feeling of being lost that feeling of being sick when the lights turn off that feeling of being depressed that feeling of being anxious that feeling of screaming to god begging to take this, only to get silence in return.
    I'd lay in that bed crying and I'd toss and id turn and turn and toss till this day. The doctors gave me medication the pastor said pray I've tried both and this anxiety hasn't gone away. So forgive me if I fantasize about being gone today In am actor who got really good at being on today but when I turn off I got right back into the shadows. Im in the deep end now I started in the shallows and I might just drown myself in these waves. Suburban hell these homes are all graves everyones coping with something but won't admit it. Their all to afraid and these kids are glued to watching me, what do I say? If I'm honest maybe they wouldn't think highly of me. Everything they want me to be, is what I'm dying to be. But everything I really am is what im not trying to be. I want them to know they are not alone in their struggles. I wake up in tears and fall back asleep in those puddles. I don't think I'll ever get out of this valley I'm in, terrified that all along god has tallied my sins, and if he has the number must be astronomic. My life is a joke and you keep reading just pass the comic because everything you think that I am is far from the truth. I wish I could open up to you and just let loose, but my vocal cords get tight when the devil pulls on this noose and then I'm back to keeping everything bottled up inside. But he's not gonna keep me from pulling the throttle back this time, He's not gonna keep me trapped like this. I can't get outta bed, I was never made to act like this, I'm packing up my bags and he can't stop me from running fast like this. I'm not gonna be a slave to these voices of anxiety, I'm shoving the devil back for every time he lied to me, and I'm taking a belt to these demons who whispered dispare in my ear, and I'm ignoring everyone neighsayer who stands and stares when I'm near. I'm moving forward out of this slump I took my bruises I took my pumps. I fell down but I got right back up, so give me a torch and lets light that up.
    I'm setting fire to the devil and I'm dousing these demons in gasoline. Look at you now, now your not laighing at me, now who's the one whos being tourtured and punked, now who's the one closing every door that I want, now whos the one watching the other burn to the ground. Dont look away from me you better turn back around I'm not done talking to you. Now I'm watching your moves I'm on your back and I'm stalking you, and when you try to ruin some other kids life I'll be stopping you too. You took 31 years of my life and I can't get that back you told me to end my life, and I nearly got killed for that!. You took me down but I bounced right back. I was lost then I got found like that. And everything you told me I wasn't, someone new told me I was, and everything you hated in me someone new told me he loves, and when you tried to kill me with depression and anxiety he reached in placed hope deep inside me. So I'm done listening to you and letting you control me, I'm announcing it now that the devil cant hold me, I'm walking away from the old me and I'm demanding a refund for every lie that you sold me you knew I'd find a way out sooner or later. And I found my escape in the form of a savior

  • @ArinzeTV
    @ArinzeTV Год назад +57

    I love the fact that he referenced God and our saviour Jesus as his ticket out from anxiety. This piece is such an inspiration and an eye opener to the limitless potentials of God to touch and change ANYONE. keep repping Jesus man 👍

    • @jordannorris4029
      @jordannorris4029 Год назад

      I think he was just referring to God he didn't mention any names

    • @jordannorris4029
      @jordannorris4029 Год назад

      God is our savior. I wish you well

  • @mrlohan18
    @mrlohan18 3 года назад +1416

    “30 years old but still hates being alone when im home because thats when the voices get the loudests” 😞💔
    Me: 100%

    • @aliciabeckett399
      @aliciabeckett399 3 года назад +4

      Covid has me pulling overtime

    • @scott8908
      @scott8908 3 года назад +8

      @@aliciabeckett399 I have seen some of my family in almost a year due to Covid. I lost my job in May due to Covid. My uncle passed away on January 1st of this year due to suicide. My fiancé and mother to my daughter, left me for another man just a few weeks ago. I work overtime just to afford college. My anxiety is killing me slowly. It’s hard to get past this.

    • @genesisgaytan2711
      @genesisgaytan2711 3 года назад +1

      @@scott8908 i’m so sorry. i wish i could tell you that over time it gets better but time doesn’t heal things. you have to have to mindset to get better. i lost my brother in september ever since i have been right in the head.i dream abt seeing him in his casket and it keeps me up. you will get through this just believe in yourself.

    • @thandim7921
      @thandim7921 3 года назад +1

      @@scott8908 so sorry that your going this I truly hope you are happy or find happiness one day ♥️

    • @blacklab1990ify
      @blacklab1990ify 3 года назад +1

      You are not alone

  • @lauraaura2367
    @lauraaura2367 6 лет назад +514

    I can’t help but cry, this touched the deep core of me. I hate anxiety I’ve always called it the beast inside me. It rattles in my rib cage & even though I’ve aged it still has some sort of hold on me. I’m battling PTSD & everyday I’m fighting to reach that bright place of recovery, I can honestly say anxiety has never ever really left me, but I pray that one day god will release these shackles from my feet & set me free. Thanks again Clayton you always shine the brightest light for those souls like me who are struggling to find hope in the dark x bless you x

    • @barbieduggan
      @barbieduggan 6 лет назад +1

      Laura SparkleSoul Laura you need deliverance honey watch something by Derek prince he walks you through biblical deliverance you can free honey God bless you

    • @VSeriesVixen
      @VSeriesVixen 6 лет назад +1

      Laura SparkleSoul your not alone and you are so strong just by talking about it. I’ve been so afraid of it showing my weakness and it’s been a real struggle. I’ll pray for you. 💗🙏 stay strong my friend.

    • @indiacoleman9318
      @indiacoleman9318 6 лет назад +1

      Laura SparkleSoul im feel your pain

    • @captainboston419
      @captainboston419 6 лет назад +2

      I'm fighting a very similar battle, I have PTSD too. I've recently stumbled and am trying to get myself back together while coping with a recent loss of a loved one.

    • @lauraaura2367
      @lauraaura2367 6 лет назад

      Naturally Blessed
      That’s a beautiful name 💖

  • @SonofaBlacksmith
    @SonofaBlacksmith 4 года назад +267

    "I am 30yrs old and i still hate being alone by myself" ... Yea you're talking to someone that knows

    • @chrislindamood9378
      @chrislindamood9378 4 года назад +7

      I'm 23 and being alone terrifies me to the point I cry...

    • @krislyngrimes3832
      @krislyngrimes3832 4 года назад +7

      I hear ya there I'm 37 its not easy keep ya head up I try daily

    • @doodle3762
      @doodle3762 3 года назад

      33 in sugust,stay strong!

  • @Theprimarch696
    @Theprimarch696 Год назад +15

    Dear god I have never heard this before and I’m speechless there no words for how hard this just hit and brought me to tears this is absolutely insane of a song just this song just found a home on my playlist forever

  • @minenhledlamini6495
    @minenhledlamini6495 6 лет назад +1453

    Excuse me for fantasizing about being gone today

  • @collol6123
    @collol6123 5 лет назад +534

    People assume that if they see you looking unwell your probably sick.
    People don’t realise that you can have a smile on your face, but be so lonely and lost inside 💙

    • @shynellwilscuc
      @shynellwilscuc 5 лет назад +11

      Some of the most supportive people are the ones who need help the most.

    • @brandoncalloway8779
      @brandoncalloway8779 5 лет назад +1

      Oh my God yes !!!

    • @meh2063
      @meh2063 5 лет назад +2

      You got me in the feels

    • @chrismccarty2567
      @chrismccarty2567 5 лет назад +5

      It is easier to help others, then to ask for help when you feel the voices screaming....

    • @emilykrafve7502
      @emilykrafve7502 5 лет назад

      I do the same thing and my base friend don's this too

  • @judithmarie2588
    @judithmarie2588 6 лет назад +460

    Social anxiety makes me feel like a weirdo.
    I look at normal people talking and laughing and I’m just like I wish I could... maybe... never.
    Everytime I talk to someone I sweat and stumble on my words, can’t make eye contact.

    • @godschild2887
      @godschild2887 6 лет назад +9

      Judith great minds think alike. PSOL... please smile out loud. 😅😄🤣🤣😆😀🤣God loves us!!! I think I passed out holding my breath listening to this. Wow

    • @godschild2887
      @godschild2887 6 лет назад +6

      When you give eye contact you're attacking a goal by each person. So collect your gold coins video game player and count them and realize your eye contact and smile helped someone who hurts as you do and more. If you've failed relationships and were innocent and hurt someone long ago in B.C. and A.D., so everyone experienced our pains in a fashion and perhaps identically. I learned a trick. Purchase some Dollar General/Tree plates and a permanent marker. Write down all the hurts and some goods on the plates as much as you can. $20.00, I'm serious here ok??? Then take the stacks and go to a hill and rocky landscape, a playlist.... gospel or jazz is perfect and a sweater, just before night fall (whenever is sound). Grab a plate re-read it and when finished frisbee the heck away and shatter those demons. Scream if you have to like a tennis player. It may sound funny but it may just make you laugh. This will help exert you and perhaps tire you to get home shower and have a nice nights rest. Make sure to break them tho. Do not journal and re-read. Take a friend along for company or not. And the last plate write a prayer to God for complete comfort and say something positive about you and blessings. God knows your heart.... and break that one too. Because we want the past into better changes. 🤣

    • @chickenfeathers2607
      @chickenfeathers2607 6 лет назад +13

      Judith Marie same.. or whenever i have to read out loud to the class its like i forget how to read and stumble i get sweaty and i just cant do it im glad i found someone i can relate to

    • @DatSQ5
      @DatSQ5 6 лет назад +16

      You’re not alone. I feel the same.

    • @godschild2887
      @godschild2887 6 лет назад

      @@chickenfeathers2607 ! Gold for you. You can do it. Sweaty or not! You are expelling evil fire out of your body that you've suppressed, and simply taking others' pains unknowingly included. So work it out by a Holy Fire Baptismal is what I call it. And spit it out as you do your favorite songs to sing. Do you enjoy singing? You can throw in before your speech about your holy baptismal. Hmm! Crack a joke and say! This is hard work and forgive the perspiration. And go right into your speech about ANXIETY-ANXIETY! It will help others. And when the sweat begins the class will understand in suspense of your wisecrack. Best thing if you don't perspire then you've beat your fear

  • @johncarlsen3467
    @johncarlsen3467 6 месяцев назад +23

    As a retired US Army soldier of 21 years. I turned all of my anxiety, concerns and inner demons over to my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Accept Jesus as your Lord and Savior in your heart and soul and the Holy Spirit will live inside you, he will be your counselor, guide and comforter. Praise God and Hallelujah

    • @Luxreytube.gcomklo
      @Luxreytube.gcomklo 4 месяца назад +2

      you understood the message like I did. so many didn't get the important message in the end its sad. its about faith in him and he will help you get through

    • @GirlGetUpAgain
      @GirlGetUpAgain 3 месяца назад

      Thank you so much for your service. You are a hero!

  • @mikejohnson6923
    @mikejohnson6923 5 лет назад +279

    Anxiety and depression it's real and if you haven't been through it please don't judge me, pray for me!

    • @dannysiragusa2000
      @dannysiragusa2000 5 лет назад +5

      I will pray for you god bless 🙏🏻

    • @sushibott3178
      @sushibott3178 5 лет назад +1

      No, I won't pray for you. Change yourself don't rely yourself on others

    • @mikejohnson6923
      @mikejohnson6923 5 лет назад +1

      Thank you, God bless!

    • @NoName-vn4jh
      @NoName-vn4jh 5 лет назад

      @@sushibott3178 Sometimes its just not that easy

    • @sushibott3178
      @sushibott3178 5 лет назад +1

      @Amy the mythical creature Well suck it up and try and make an effort

  • @mikehoncho9298
    @mikehoncho9298 5 лет назад +372

    "Screaming to god begging him to take this only to get silence in return"wow I felt that!

    • @incognitogirl6201
      @incognitogirl6201 5 лет назад

      Same

    • @bf5655
      @bf5655 5 лет назад

      Same😔

    • @hannahjohnson808
      @hannahjohnson808 5 лет назад +25

      God’s timing can be rough , but he does make things all work together for the greater good.

    • @See-if_I_care
      @See-if_I_care 5 лет назад +1

      Story of my life 😧

    • @AngelKissedBy2
      @AngelKissedBy2 5 лет назад +1

      @@See-if_I_care I feel you man 😓☝💯💯

  • @dxddy._.lucas119
    @dxddy._.lucas119 5 лет назад +562

    Your stuff really spoke to me... And now I always believe that God is there for me.... I'm 14 and I went to the hospital for a suicidal attempt.... I watched this video and it really spoke to me and u wanted to say thank you for that... You really helped me in life... And now I know that God is with me everywhere even when I sin... He's still there... Thank you

    • @thomasheaton3841
      @thomasheaton3841 5 лет назад +8

      Iyana Chan not many people know how deep the ending is when he said he was good and didn’t talk.....

    • @lee5246
      @lee5246 5 лет назад +3

      Iyana Chan tore strong please stay with us on this earth even if you feel worthless I need you if we lose you heaven gains another angel idk you but I love you🥺💓

    • @dxddy._.lucas119
      @dxddy._.lucas119 5 лет назад +2

      Thomas Heaton thank you😭😩

    • @dxddy._.lucas119
      @dxddy._.lucas119 5 лет назад +2

      Official Lilz thank you ❤️❤️❤️

    • @nadiataylor5056
      @nadiataylor5056 5 лет назад +4

      Same, I was 13 when I went to a mental hospital for a suicide attempt. And that hospital did nothing to help me, besides give me pills that I now can't refill till I go to a therapist. But my anxiety triggers my depression, and I get anxiety to almost everything that involves socializing. So I'm kinda just stuck here

  • @kellynelson3530
    @kellynelson3530 19 дней назад +1

    I’ve been in and out of counselling, and I still am I turned to body building and scuba diving and it’s really helped me in different ways being in the water clears my mind and helps me meditate, body building helps me achieve my goals and use my will power and counselling helps me to talk about things that are on my mind. There is no shame in seeking help if anything it shows strength. If your reading this you are strong and you are beautiful inside and out remember you are worthy of love and you are amazing in every single way ❤

  • @asherslife5511
    @asherslife5511 4 года назад +1776

    My therapist asked me what my anxiety is like and I showed Him this video and it brought him to tears

    • @thelastofitskind3034
      @thelastofitskind3034 3 года назад +50

      Hang in there you have a strong purpose

    • @JB-no3nf
      @JB-no3nf 3 года назад +20

      Facts

    • @isaacortega6753
      @isaacortega6753 3 года назад +18

      Stay strong brother

    • @eddiechandler4018
      @eddiechandler4018 3 года назад +23

      that didnt happen

    • @mikegrant3503
      @mikegrant3503 3 года назад +46

      @@eddiechandler4018 you you have no clue what happens is another person's life your dirt and if i had the chance i would step on you just like it

  • @sexypickle5275
    @sexypickle5275 4 года назад +202

    I’m 13, I deal with anxiety, depression, and I have attempted suicide twice, I am on antidepressants but it’s so hard.. I’m so sorry to everyone who’s going through the same. I love you all

    • @ikbenblauw123
      @ikbenblauw123 3 года назад +4

      You will be ok some day

    • @cookie05niall
      @cookie05niall 3 года назад +4

      I'm 14 and stated when I was 5.😭😔😣

    • @animeedits6263
      @animeedits6263 3 года назад +2

      It’s gonna be ok

    • @blen183
      @blen183 3 года назад +5

      Keep your eyes on God

    • @lexilexi2109
      @lexilexi2109 3 года назад +6

      I’m 11 had anxiety before when I was ten now I have anxiety and depression your not going through this alone

  • @michaelpadilla6561
    @michaelpadilla6561 5 лет назад +331

    “To live is to suffer, to survive is to find meaning in the suffering”

    • @lotusgrl444
      @lotusgrl444 4 года назад +2

      Very true

    • @jennamordis5799
      @jennamordis5799 4 года назад +2

      Michael Padilla I’m gonna get this tattooed now

    • @conorben132
      @conorben132 4 года назад +1

      Dmx

    • @hellohello-ey9qj
      @hellohello-ey9qj 4 года назад

      Dmx

    • @tunesmiith6594
      @tunesmiith6594 4 года назад

      "if you love something, let it go. If it comes back, it's yours".... Hold me down ..... only here cause it hit. this too

  • @elizabethhunt6149
    @elizabethhunt6149 10 месяцев назад +4

    This is art! Absolutely incredible. Showing him walking in. And the last piece is genius!! It hurts to know others feel like this but also reminding me we’re not alone. ❤ hugs to anyone who gets this.

    • @Faith-t8f
      @Faith-t8f 10 месяцев назад

      Hugs 🌻🌻😊

    • @Faith-t8f
      @Faith-t8f 10 месяцев назад

  • @cotyellis1613
    @cotyellis1613 4 года назад +94

    Damn dude. I cried the entire time listening to this. This dude speaks loud and so many of us are quiet out here. Everything he said is exactly how I feel

  • @baileywoods4398
    @baileywoods4398 4 года назад +262

    I never comment.. I never feel this connected to a song. God was telling me to watch this because he knew I needed this in my life today. Bless you

    • @gabbymitchell8457
      @gabbymitchell8457 4 года назад +7

      He loves you, give everything you have to Him and he’ll be there! reach out if you need someone to talk to, it’s okay not to be okay! you got this❤️

    • @brennerscott77
      @brennerscott77 4 года назад +1

      Amen Sister 🙏 Music is my therapist 🎶

    • @thelastofitskind3034
      @thelastofitskind3034 3 года назад

      Be strong

    • @arianablandon3092
      @arianablandon3092 3 года назад

      I'm I almost killed myself when I was 10 I never talked to god but he told my to watch this. I don't watch stuff like this and one day when I was hurting the most and almost ended everything this was on my recommended and that day my 3 year old cousin can yo my house and said " if you die I will kill myself to be with you" I had the rope in my garage idk how she know but she did and it broke my heart

  • @phoenixthoughts9400
    @phoenixthoughts9400 4 года назад +284

    For someone who has depression and anxiety .... I can fully relate with him...

  • @JosephPavich
    @JosephPavich Год назад +33

    "You took thirty years of my life and I can't get that back, you told me to end my life and I nearly got killed for that" - Clayton Jennings
    This verse hit me hard

  • @CurranCollections
    @CurranCollections 4 года назад +420

    I’m not the crying type at all. But watching this had tears rolling down my face because it’s crazy to hear someone else speaking of the same things that I deal with and feel everyday, so relatable. Keep it up man. Thank you, I needed this.

    • @kristenmorse8251
      @kristenmorse8251 4 года назад +1

      Hang on man, we feel this! We are together x

    • @bubblegum3668
      @bubblegum3668 4 года назад +1

      Same...

    • @leighramsey1700
      @leighramsey1700 4 года назад +3

      Wow this hit me hard.Tears pouring.We really need to do something and stop shaming people with mental health issues.

    • @KITTKATT11
      @KITTKATT11 4 года назад +1

      You're not alone 🤗🐾

    • @xxii8091
      @xxii8091 4 года назад +2

      In Jesus Name I loose this man. I send comfort by the healing hands of Jesus our Lord and Savior. Take your rightful place in Gods kingdom. All his words are full of life and power. Use his words to secure your freedom.

  • @chimiem1742
    @chimiem1742 3 года назад +289

    "I found my escape in the form of a savior!!!" … I talk to God every time I'm Anxious. I remind myself and rely on his promise of peace in my life.

    • @darlarose1574
      @darlarose1574 3 года назад +7

      That's the best thing you can do! I remember when I was 10 years old and a I first developed anxiety I would just lay in my bed and beg God to help me. To give me just five minutes of relief. I found these books that went through every Bible story and they gave me peace. It didn't take away my anxiety but it helped me so much. Talking to God and reading His word is sometimes the only thing that brings me peace. I'm so happy it helps you too! God bless.

    • @johnnyesponge5656
      @johnnyesponge5656 3 года назад +1

      But what if you're not good enough to pray

    • @chimiem1742
      @chimiem1742 3 года назад +5

      @@johnnyesponge5656 everyone is good enough to pray. If anything God tells us to come as we are. We need God to help us bevome better so he doesnt expect us to go to him already perfect. Its in our weaknesses that he is glorified. So just pray. If you find it difficult to pray the conventional way you can just talk to him likebhe was in front of you. Have a conversation with him. Thats what I do. I used to feel exactly that way. Like I wasnt good enough.

    • @Next_level.keeper01
      @Next_level.keeper01 3 года назад +1

      @@johnnyesponge5656 “a wicked being would not ponder their grace”

    • @farwahehee8087
      @farwahehee8087 3 года назад +1

      Hello, i have just uploaded a poem on my channel could you please💖share it with your friends and tell me if you like it, i would really appreciate it

  • @itsyourgirlamanda1624
    @itsyourgirlamanda1624 2 года назад +1272

    It's crazy how many people come back to this everyday. This song is legendary 💕
    2022 anyone??

  • @ericastewart1230
    @ericastewart1230 Год назад +1

    The beat part of this whole thing is how at the end he didn't really say any of the things he wanted to and that's what makes this so real. Thank you Clayton for using your gift to give us somewhere to go and not feel so alone. ❤

  • @MyPeacefulWar
    @MyPeacefulWar 6 лет назад +135

    I have anxiety, but Social anxiety is the worst of my demons.
    I will say I thought it was funny when the opening was an Anxiety support group. I thought, damn, I'd be too scared to go to one and talk let alone be there. and when he spoke up, I felt that shit down to my core. then in the end, when you realized he never really spoke, and it was just all the things he wished he could say, I felt that shit all over again. great video. very real and very emotional.
    thank you for being able to put this into words; its therapeutic.

    • @kalentimmons5530
      @kalentimmons5530 6 лет назад +2

      Angelica Mystique I’m 14 and I’ve spent six years in support groups and therapy, they’ve truly helped me and they might help you too but everyone is different

  • @lemadraws9751
    @lemadraws9751 3 года назад +148

    The part at the end when he realizes he didn’t even say it out loud hits so close to home, I think about saying things and run through the whole thing in my head but often don’t say it

    • @mablebwalya6840
      @mablebwalya6840 2 года назад +2

      I found My Escape in the Form of a Saviour that hit me ❣️💯😭❣️💯 Clayton Sir You're a Treasure to our Generation 🇿🇲❣️💯💯💯❣️

    • @buildingperfectiongrouty8767
      @buildingperfectiongrouty8767 2 года назад +1

      Its mad how "silence " can create such change

  • @bruhgus2557
    @bruhgus2557 5 лет назад +227

    Suicidal Thoughts is a common thing for me, I feel like Stress will never leave my side

    • @megansackel2449
      @megansackel2449 5 лет назад +4

      Stay strong we all love u ❤

    • @Spookyookie11
      @Spookyookie11 5 лет назад +7

      Hey man, god will carry you if you let him. Get in a relationship with him man and I promise you won’t regret it

    • @barbarazbinden688
      @barbarazbinden688 5 лет назад +2

      im here for u, bless you♥️

    • @kathleencostello8209
      @kathleencostello8209 4 года назад

      Hey man it's okay just know god loves you so much and he can't wait to meet you one day and just think how wonderful god look around you he choose to put you on this earth for a reason so one day your going to be thankful you didn't listen to the devil

    • @Mrphilcastedey1
      @Mrphilcastedey1 4 года назад

      Don't fight your feelings, live with them, it will be easier. Take a break when you need it, reload your battery. Don't push you to much, you don't need to

  • @Bulbargie68
    @Bulbargie68 3 месяца назад +1

    I cried the whole way through...I thought I was the only person feeling this way...He spoke of my life ❤

  • @Itss.Sara2002
    @Itss.Sara2002 6 лет назад +434

    This brought tears to my eyes

  • @adamaryquezada3560
    @adamaryquezada3560 5 лет назад +521

    “And I found my escape through the form of a savior “

  • @chloegrace7470
    @chloegrace7470 4 года назад +64

    You realise how much you’re hurting when you relate to every word.

    • @Daw64
      @Daw64 4 года назад

      I thought you were Ewok for a second

  • @sharonsalman2675
    @sharonsalman2675 Год назад +3

    You just made me cry! Boy can I relate! No need for words, I hear you.

  • @wanaaar8726
    @wanaaar8726 4 года назад +594

    ɪ ғᴇᴇʟ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ʜᴇ sᴀʏs..

    • @EpicOdy
      @EpicOdy 4 года назад +5

      ĸιwa naĸaмarυ
      (E v e r y t h i n g . . . . . . . .)

    • @branthyatt9982
      @branthyatt9982 4 года назад

      Ke too 😭😭😭

    • @branthyatt9982
      @branthyatt9982 4 года назад

      @Maya Ahmed me to 😪

    • @only_bug
      @only_bug 4 года назад +1

      I can’t not cry at his words.

    • @SamFBM
      @SamFBM 4 года назад

      @Maya Ahmed stay strong

  • @tacosanonymous8440
    @tacosanonymous8440 5 лет назад +86

    “I found my life in form of a savior” I started crying the second I heard that, it hit home

  • @cocoapuffz2894
    @cocoapuffz2894 3 года назад +256

    “I’m not gonna be a slave to these voices of anxiety” that made me want to cry

  • @davidrosa9366
    @davidrosa9366 6 месяцев назад +1

    Years ago you saved my life with your messages and videos….. I needed to come back here to help me with these new struggles! All I gotta say is thank you!

  • @kidrauhlyuhh5224
    @kidrauhlyuhh5224 6 лет назад +229

    3:38 “took my bruises i took my lumps, fell down then got right back up” - Eminem: Beautiful

    • @depressedthot3119
      @depressedthot3119 6 лет назад +1

      Its just a saying that many people say but i got eminem vibes from it as well

    • @ClaytonJennings
      @ClaytonJennings  6 лет назад +101

      I wasn’t sure anyone would catch that. I also based the setting of the video off of Em’s “When I’m Gone” music video. As a kid all I listened to was Eminem. His music seemed to speak to me in my anxiety and depression. I always felt like he was going through it too. I’ve sent him letters and I’ve prayed for him. I hope he finds the same help I found in Jesus.

    • @kidrauhlyuhh5224
      @kidrauhlyuhh5224 6 лет назад +2

      Clayton Jennings yes it is like the when im gone video oh my goodness! this is truly incredible you both inspire me & im so glad you were able to find the hope in him like i do. You’re amazing, keep it going.. you’re never alone 💜

    • @depressedthot3119
      @depressedthot3119 6 лет назад

      @@ClaytonJennings i feel the same way i always listen to the rappers from my hometown i live in Michigan which is where Eminem and Nf both lived Eminem lived 37 minutes away from me ive passed his home many times ive passed NFs as well both rappers along with you make me cry daily i quote your music so much even if i found it days ago i still quote it my suicidal friend and i both just sit and listen no words just sitting and crying youve helped me i love your music and i love your faith in god

    • @_derpycactus_4455
      @_derpycactus_4455 6 лет назад

      Clayton Jennings his music speaks to me

  • @user-ri9yc7hv2h
    @user-ri9yc7hv2h 5 лет назад +52

    "Anxiety isn't an item you can return at the store" every single word that was said I could relate to, thanks for this it's very inspiring ♡ I suffer from anxiety and depression and this has helped me in a way.

  • @jayvideos7873
    @jayvideos7873 6 лет назад +91

    I been battling severe anxiety everyday ever since I was a child. I’m now 24 years old I’ve never had a mother and father nor friends. People don’t understand my struggles so I isolate myself from everyone. People like Clayton jennings gives me hope he speaks everything I could never let out. God bless this man😢😢🙏🙏

    • @brandonkanis3016
      @brandonkanis3016 6 лет назад +2

      Life does get easier I know first hand I have struggled depression anxiety for 30 years of my life suicide thaghts my world is crushed no way out I feel u my friend

    • @dyslexieella4515
      @dyslexieella4515 6 лет назад +3

      I suffer from anxiety and anorexia...

    • @jenniferl5456
      @jenniferl5456 5 лет назад +1

      meditation helps wonders. I started watching youtube videos and listening to it.

  • @ovrmya
    @ovrmya 5 месяцев назад +2

    my anxiety imprisoned me for years, i’ve just accepted it.. but youtube been recommending me videos like these and it made me realize i could actually live, i just have to make that effort. i’m on a journey to the life i dream about. i’m so grateful for content creators like this, thank you for making me remember i can take control of my life, thank you for making me realize i’m not alone.

  • @łhe_GOC
    @łhe_GOC 5 лет назад +515

    I’m currently having suicidal thoughts but you are helping me think about living
    Thank You

    • @tijalah1256
      @tijalah1256 5 лет назад +18

      Its gonna get better.Jesus loves you bro

    • @brisket5588
      @brisket5588 5 лет назад +12

      I don’t even know you but just now you are loved by me and many others

    • @skyhigh5442
      @skyhigh5442 5 лет назад +10

      Ur not alone we love u

    • @unabajic6105
      @unabajic6105 5 лет назад +4

      You are not alone and you need to know that every problem has a solution. You just need to find it and you will find it sooner or later❤

    • @slavesofrighteousnessjacob8564
      @slavesofrighteousnessjacob8564 5 лет назад +5

      I too have the same thoughts. But Jesus loves you bro. He will be with you. Tell your problems with him. God bless you bro

  • @ninaaaaishere
    @ninaaaaishere 5 лет назад +228

    *_WHY DO I ALWAYS CRY WITH HIS VIDEOS?!_*

    • @o2.raz3r
      @o2.raz3r 5 лет назад

      cuz there sad durr

    • @ashleytrober226
      @ashleytrober226 5 лет назад +9

      Because its a reflection of your feelings. Its a relief when you hear someone going threw the same things you are. So you cry. It gives you hope

    • @messulamgarcia1499
      @messulamgarcia1499 5 лет назад +2

      Maybe he says the words your feeling, its like he's talking about you somehow..

    • @timeless_floris865
      @timeless_floris865 5 лет назад +2

      Maybe you can relate to the words he’s saying to something in your life...😕

    • @leyamasterson3322
      @leyamasterson3322 5 лет назад +2

      Same here! He is so inspiring!

  • @wetpotato2222
    @wetpotato2222 2 года назад +373

    "You took 30 years of my life and I can't get that back" hits me so hard.

    • @fordshojoe8080
      @fordshojoe8080 2 года назад +8

      Me too and everyone says I'm being overdramatic its not that bad you're to old to still care about not having a dad when you grew up and that was a long time ago you need to forget about it.

    • @freedomordeath89
      @freedomordeath89 2 года назад +3

      @@fordshojoe8080 to be fair we are being over-dramatic, its the definition of anxiety disorders, our brains attacking themselves 🙂

    • @fordshojoe8080
      @fordshojoe8080 2 года назад +6

      @@freedomordeath89 yea I reckon that's true still doesn't make it right to talk to us like that.

    • @freedomordeath89
      @freedomordeath89 2 года назад +1

      @@fordshojoe8080 don't let it get under your skin bro, don't overthink it, most people say it because for them it's a normal thing to say

    • @celestialphoenixqueen9258
      @celestialphoenixqueen9258 2 года назад +2

      severe and really bad anxiety and depression and trust issues have had a hold on me since i was in junior high . i am 26 now and it still has a hold of me . i have changed and become cold and emotionally empty i don't remember being so happy in a long time

  • @jddesilva6909
    @jddesilva6909 Год назад +7

    I'm 17 years old, I've been listening to you for longer then I know. I struggle with really bad panic attacks. I collapse to the floor. It hurts to breathe. My throat closing up. I cant stop them, so I lay on the floor crying beacuse i cant breathe. I wish I could not have them. I missed a whole month of class beacuse I thought everyone hated me. I couldnt go to class beacuse id cry so much. You've helped me figure out how to help me. Thank you.

    • @ladyzinada5341
      @ladyzinada5341 7 месяцев назад

      Get better darling. You got this

    • @linnietraver9904
      @linnietraver9904 6 месяцев назад

      You got this your not in this alone I also have fought panic attacks and depression the doctor just fed me meds and set me home but no I need more I need someone been through the same things

  • @luvellieee
    @luvellieee 6 лет назад +308

    panic attacks , separation anxiety , and depression have been apart of my life for about 3 years now & self harming for 2 years. i’ll be 18 in january but idk if i can make it until then. i feel like i’m drowning 24/7 , but i don’t want to give up just yet. i can’t give up, and i have to be strong..or at least try. idk tbh

    • @alipitre9666
      @alipitre9666 6 лет назад +6

      You'll get though this!

    • @valev3729
      @valev3729 6 лет назад +11

      anna g smith Take it moment by moment. Believe there’s something good on the other side of it all, even if every fiber of your being tells you otherwise. Let the endurance needed be carved into you through this experience and know you are not the only one experiencing these things.
      Suicide Prevention Hotline
      Call: ‭(800) 273-8255‬
      Or text: ‭741-741‬
      Contact them before you get to that point.
      There are resources out there. Keep reaching out. Please don’t give up, no matter what the voices tell you. You are worth it, your life is worth living. You are valuable, created with a purpose unique to you. I believe in you. ❤️

    • @oliviatihansky7176
      @oliviatihansky7176 6 лет назад +9

      Turn to God. He will help you. He loves you and you are worth SO much! God will never leave or abandon you, I promise. He is for you not against you. Only He can help us through these tough situations. Lean on Him at all times!! I promise He will never ever let you down. He is perfect, and an almighty loving God! Praise be to Jesus. You will get through this. Storms are temporary, they are sent to make you not break you. You are getting stronger through this storm! Keep fighting and don’t you ever give up! God will help you through this. Talk to Him daily and pray your heart out! I’m praying for you, God bless you!

    • @lenkachladkova1762
      @lenkachladkova1762 6 лет назад +7

      Dear Anna. Don't give up. Please don't give up. God has a beautiful, trust me, beautiful plan and purpose for your life. I know it may seem like they're just empty words, but they're true. You are SO cherished and loved by Jesus. I don't even know how hard it is to go through something like that, but Jesus knows. On the cross, he took all that on himself. All of the pain, all of the suffering, all of the sin. He was so anxious he sweat blood. Turn to Him. He understands. I am praying for you today. I believe in you. ♥️

    • @thelegendofg2342
      @thelegendofg2342 6 лет назад +5

      i hope you are still living keep fighting things might get better with time

  • @lucienmendela4919
    @lucienmendela4919 4 года назад +351

    “I do not weep
    because I'm unhappy
    I weep because I have everything
    yet I'm unhappy”
    ― Rupi Kaur

  • @CellarStudioProductions
    @CellarStudioProductions 6 лет назад +362

    This gave me goosebumps. I can relate to this in so many ways...
    Very well portrayed.

    • @swaggot6779
      @swaggot6779 6 лет назад +1

      @@annmarie3141 same

    • @haidengeary8277
      @haidengeary8277 6 лет назад

      yea, now go buya fucking t-shirt.

    • @oliviatihansky7176
      @oliviatihansky7176 6 лет назад

      Agreed. God will help you through it all though! Turn to Him and He will help you. I promise He won’t let you down. Ever!

  • @angelicyaht.8302
    @angelicyaht.8302 Год назад +2

    "I'm in the deep end now, but I started in the shallows." That part always gets me, I've been listening to this for years now. This has been my main inspiration to write my own poems about how anxiety and insecurities feel. I love this so much 💛

  • @angelahiscott2585
    @angelahiscott2585 5 лет назад +408

    I've just realised Eminem said " I've took my bruises took my lumps. Fell down and got right back up".
    Nice detail
    Thanks for all the likes!!!

    • @tsuol7296
      @tsuol7296 5 лет назад +1

      What song tho?

    • @angelahiscott2585
      @angelahiscott2585 5 лет назад +4

      @@tsuol7296 Beautiful

    • @oodeezydeezy6629
      @oodeezydeezy6629 5 лет назад +2

      Angela Hiscott they are all pissed he used it I honestly thought it was cool

    • @amjad3611
      @amjad3611 5 лет назад +1

      @@tsuol7296 You ain't a real fan

    • @tsuol7296
      @tsuol7296 5 лет назад

      @@amjad3611 what do u want

  • @shelbytumlin1039
    @shelbytumlin1039 5 лет назад +66

    Some people can never understand what it is like to live daily with anxiety and depression and not know if the next day will be better or not....

  • @CameranSherwood
    @CameranSherwood 4 года назад +206

    First night I heard Clayton I had just lost a family member to an overdose and had attempted suicide. Listened to every song of his I could find and sat in my room and cried and found the strength to see another day. Thank you Clayton

  • @bmorguson69
    @bmorguson69 Год назад +4

    I needed this!! The lord never lets his flock wander too far, he always knows how to bring them home

  • @Gatsby-qh8zd
    @Gatsby-qh8zd 3 года назад +121

    I’ve lost relationships, chances to make friends, chances just to be social. The list goes on. And as a man it’s hard to admit that. Your raised to always be fine, to sweep every problem every insecurity, every fear, burden, and heartache under the rug and pretend that your okay to say that your fine. Until one day your not. And that’s a really sad truth

    • @MrBlodhund
      @MrBlodhund 3 года назад +3

      I hope you will try meditation my friend, it’s truly amazing and it reduced anxiety by 95-99% or removed it completely. Please try it brother, it WILL help you, stay strong friend!❤️

    • @farwahehee8087
      @farwahehee8087 3 года назад

      Hello, i have just uploaded a poem on my channel could you please💖share it with your friends and tell me if you like it, i would really appreciate it

    • @lukusdennis2091
      @lukusdennis2091 2 года назад

      So so so true friend

    • @jessica1042
      @jessica1042 2 года назад

      You are strong. Woman, man, child, or friend. You're feelings are always valid. I hope you're doing better. And if not? You'll get there. Good luck

  • @okkk934
    @okkk934 4 года назад +421

    Ever hold a mask up for so long it feels unnatural having it off when not alone. It becomes apart of your face.

    • @primallunatic6554
      @primallunatic6554 4 года назад +5

      all the time

    • @alexs6746
      @alexs6746 3 года назад +6

      My life feels like a lie

    • @rezi4314
      @rezi4314 3 года назад

      @@onyapidi5174 if you feel like that was about corona you should've never even commented🤦‍♂️

    • @Mikecetti
      @Mikecetti 3 года назад +3

      I find myself trapped between not knowing if the mask is really me. Cant remember anymore

    • @qmidd0920
      @qmidd0920 3 года назад +1

      Yes

  • @SuperKaylaDee
    @SuperKaylaDee 3 года назад +362

    Anyone else just sit on there bed, still crying with this on repeat? Crying, with the constant feeling of hopelessness, jus knowing their life is worthless and has nothing to live for? No family or friends?!

    • @Caustic968
      @Caustic968 3 года назад +6

      Yes😔

    • @tinaosrecak1030
      @tinaosrecak1030 3 года назад +18

      I have both parents and 2 sisters..... I'm about to become aunt.... I have great, big family.... But I am still miserable and feel like I'm all alone in the world..... And I listen to it in car... I can't cry at home where ppl might see me and ask questions..... I couldn't handle that....
      (Listen to it at home only during night or when I'm all alone)...

    • @hannahbarlow6089
      @hannahbarlow6089 3 года назад +9

      You're life isn't worthless, you have a purpose and have unmeasurable worth, you never know the good you make in peoples lives and the blessing that you are to people around you.

    • @lwya12
      @lwya12 3 года назад +8

      What you are feeling is valid, yet rooted in darkness and lies. Jesus adores you and finds you immeasurably valuable. He cares about your soul & knows what you're going through. Talk to him, yell or cry out if you need to, & he will answer 💛 lifting y'all up in prayer now.

    • @alex633333
      @alex633333 3 года назад +5

      @SuperKaylaDee I wanna hug you so much sweetheart ❤️😭

  • @Sammy2JZ-GTE
    @Sammy2JZ-GTE 9 месяцев назад +2

    My younger self back in 2019 had seen this video and I had commented on it about how I pray I become stronger and how I hope my mom would be nicer to me and not show so much hate… 5 years later she is still the same I am a junior in high school that have been doing well and I hope I am making my younger self much happier. I love you man your strong…

  • @brookeroyston9779
    @brookeroyston9779 2 года назад +360

    Anyone reading this. You have purpose you are here for a reason. Don't give up, stay. We need you here.

  • @AltAttano-kq8my
    @AltAttano-kq8my 4 года назад +116

    The realest part of this is the fact that all of the emotions and feelings and thoughts he was expressing to explain how he is, was all in his head, and he didn't say them. I go to therapy, you guys have no idea how many times I have a clear vision set on what I want to say, and then I just never say it and just try to not answer.

    • @londynn6220
      @londynn6220 3 года назад +2

      same here,and I hate it..I hate it bc I know that it will help me if I just open up but my damn trust issues prevent me from doing so..and I wanna get the help I need and I wanna..I wanna be the happy,cheerful,creative,energetic person I used to be..

    • @AltAttano-kq8my
      @AltAttano-kq8my 3 года назад

      @@londynn6220 you got discord?

    • @londynn6220
      @londynn6220 3 года назад

      @@AltAttano-kq8my yeah but my so called parents turned off the WiFi for it

    • @AltAttano-kq8my
      @AltAttano-kq8my 3 года назад

      @@londynn6220 Gotchu, any way we can talk or nah

    • @mmmp8956
      @mmmp8956 3 года назад

      @@AltAttano-kq8my can we talk

  • @joshhutchin727
    @joshhutchin727 3 года назад +320

    Wow.
    Made me cry, didn’t realize how someone could speak what’s in my head.
    Thank you.
    Love

    • @farwahehee8087
      @farwahehee8087 3 года назад +1

      Hello, i have just uploaded a poem on my channel could you please💖share it with your friends and tell me if you like it, i would really appreciate it

    • @Jasmine21234
      @Jasmine21234 2 года назад +3

      Same here

    • @blackjackhogs8773
      @blackjackhogs8773 2 года назад +2

      Same here

    • @neversaygoodbye4
      @neversaygoodbye4 2 года назад +4

      Right?! Wow! Its nice to know I’m not alone though!

    • @gangsternumber1631
      @gangsternumber1631 2 года назад

      Will anyone ever truly understand me? 💔