Dealing With A DRUG OR ALCOHOL RELAPSE

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  • Опубликовано: 10 сен 2024
  • If you find yourself dealing with a drug or alcohol relapse, do these three things immediately. It's time to move into damage control. These things will help you contain the relapse and get right back on track!
    Click this link to get your FREE Quick Guide For These 5 Skills:
    www.familyreco...
    ❤️️📣Learn How To Get Your Addicted Loved One FROM DENIAL INTO RECOVERY, using our INVISIBLE INTERVENTION method:
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    ☎️If you'd like to schedule a PHONE CONSULTATION SESSION with one of our addiction specialists visit: 👉www.familyreco...
    👪FREE Family Recovery Support Group on Facebook:
    / familyrecoverysupport
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    About Me/Us
    My name is Amber Hollingsworth, and I worked in a private psychiatric hospital for 10 years. This facility provided acute care (short term) for serious mental health and Substance Use Disorders. I learned a LOT from my experience working in a psychiatric hospital. I got to see and treat almost every type of mental health and addiction issue you can think of, but it felt like a revolving door. I'd see the same people come in over and over and their families were absolutely desperate for help.
    Unfortunately, the system isn't set up to help families in general. I did pretty much every job in that hospital that a counselor could do! I worked in detox. I developed and ran an adolescent substance abuse program. I worked sometimes worked on the unit with severe mental health patients such as Schizophrenia, Bipolar Disorder, Borderline Personal Disorder, and many more.
    In addition to working as a counselor in the inpatient facility and the intensive outpatient programs, I also served as Patient Advocate and Service Excellence Coordinator. The Patient Advocate is the person that gets called in when a patient or family member has a complaint. The Service Excellence Coordinator was the person who trained all new staff on providing excellent clinical and customer services.
    These experiences gave me a unique perspective on the flaws of our mental health and substance abuse systems and also what needed to be done to correct them.
    I don't want to make the facility out to be an inadequate facility. In fact, it was one of the better emergency mental health facilities. It just wasn't useful for creating long term recovery. You see, the system just isn't set up in a way that's conducive to creating sustainable long term change for individuals or families.
    All this led to me deciding to leave the hospital and start my own addiction treatment center, specializing in addicted family systems. Over the years, I had developed lots of good relationships with other clinicians, and I knew who was the best! I put together a superstar team, and we now run out own outpatient addiction treatment practice called Hope For Families Recovery Center.
    We've worked very hard not to tie ourselves to the "big system." We don't work for the insurance companies. We don't work for a hospital system, We don't answer to anyone except our clients, their families, and the licensing boards that provide us with our professional license. We have all Licensed Professional Counselors (LPC)-(which is mental health counselors) and also Licensed Addiction Counselors (LAC).
    We don't provide inpatient treatment, but we do partner with a phenomenal sober living facility called Greenville Transitions. They offer top-notch sober living care for young men in the early stages of recovery. www.greenville...
    Our RUclips channel is our way of trying to help as many people as possible find the answers they need to beat addiction. We spend a ton of time and money, creating these resources and support that you find them valuable and will share them with anyone else you know who may need them. The educational library of addiction resources on our RUclips channel is completely free of charge and are readily available to any person or family who needs them. So please consider subscribing if you haven't already.
    You can help us in our mission to get the right information to everyone who needs it by sharing these family recovery resources.
    We know that not everyone can access our treatment services, but we do offer consultations and coaching sessions to individuals and families all over the country.
    If you'd like to schedule a consultation with one of our specialist, please visit hopeforfamilie...

Комментарии • 268

  • @PutTheShovelDown
    @PutTheShovelDown  4 года назад +7

    👆Of course, relapse PREVENTION is the best protocol, click get access to my Relapse Prevention playlist:👉 ruclips.net/user/playlist?

  • @codeyal-hammad3018
    @codeyal-hammad3018 3 года назад +86

    I went 6 months sober then relapsed and fell off for 6 weeks because I got the F it’s now I’m 103 day’s sober because I will never give up!

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  3 года назад +2

      👍👍👍👍👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏🙌🙌🙌👊

    • @bryanlopez4994
      @bryanlopez4994 2 года назад +1

      Nice and I was 5 months sober but just relapsed but it was a bad one and now I’m just trying not to get to down on myself and bounce back as quick as possible.

    • @codeyal-hammad3018
      @codeyal-hammad3018 2 года назад

      Almost 17 months clean & sober thanks to my higher power and the fellowship

    • @codeyal-hammad3018
      @codeyal-hammad3018 2 года назад +1

      @@bryanlopez4994 you got this! Never give up🙏🏽

    • @erickiyoshiphillips2323
      @erickiyoshiphillips2323 Год назад +2

      Keep going I'm 81 days clean and I have relapsed twice after 60 days and 75 days this past year. Now I know to forgive myself and I know I can't just use once because it never works out that way. Keep going we got this

  • @blksayajinx5499
    @blksayajinx5499 4 месяца назад +9

    Maaaaaaaan by thee grace and mercy of my Father God in Heaven I can say I'm a year and 103 days sober I am all to familiar with the battle, one of the most intense battles ever is not beating yourself up it's a reflex to just dwell in self pity and embracing those thoughts of feeling like a failure which can also lead to thoughts of suicide, it's the most miserable feeling ever but I'm here to tell you it is not impossible to get out of that feeling I know from experience ❤

  • @lukasvilla2657
    @lukasvilla2657 3 года назад +52

    I relapsed after 5 months of sobriety and I'm the type of person that really feels like a failure like I lost all those days before the relapse. I used for one day and I got back up quickly. I did not stay in the mess. I don't feel like I should throw away 179 good days for one bad day. I had a lapse in judgement, but I decided to stop and decided to get back onto the horse. Each relapse gets worse mentally. I definitely almost got stuck in the shame and guilt until I saw this video. Thank you. Some feelings I can't just think away unfortunately, I'm going to feel like crap for a few days.

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  3 года назад +10

      You're exactly right, Lukas, one lapse does not undo your 179 days. The fact that you got right back up is a testament of how strong your recovery is!

    • @shanitagilmore6876
      @shanitagilmore6876 2 года назад +6

      The guilt of relapseing is so bad I wanted to end it all but that will be self'ish towards my kid's and family I just feel so stupid

    • @lukasvilla2657
      @lukasvilla2657 2 года назад +2

      @@shanitagilmore6876 you have alot to live for. Keep moving forward

    • @YouKnowImRight99
      @YouKnowImRight99 Год назад +1

      Your comment helped alot thank you!❤️

    • @lukasvilla2657
      @lukasvilla2657 Год назад

      @@YouKnowImRight99 right on 🙏 you're welcome

  • @rian6352
    @rian6352 2 года назад +39

    Messed up a few days ago after 3 years of sobriety. Feel horrible, but I know my progress isn’t lost. Got back up on the horse. Thank you for this video, it was very helpful!

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  2 года назад +4

      You got this!

    • @katherinebragg9166
      @katherinebragg9166 9 месяцев назад

      Bravo!!!

    • @rian6352
      @rian6352 6 месяцев назад

      @@thedrift8515 Hey man, thanks for asking! Now, I’m smoking weed and drinking. It’s not great, I know. But I’m off the opiates which is good enough for me for now. Well, I’m on Suboxone. Take that as you will, I’m not ashamed of it. It doesn’t get me high, and helps tremendously with cravings. I’m going to A.A. to help with my remaining vices. I’m doing good overall! Drinking and smoking weed is nothing compared to the evil effects of opiates.

  • @macieq44
    @macieq44 Год назад +14

    I just relapsed after 4 years. The thing you said about being sober for 300 + 1 day was powerful. Thank you for that! Best regards from Poland.

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  Год назад +5

      I'm so glad this is helpful for you, Macieq44! You have 4 years sober, don't let a little blip keep you down. You got this!

  • @guitarandgames1386
    @guitarandgames1386 3 года назад +15

    Trying to get sober off Opiates. I successfully quit coke and pcp but I've already relapsed 4 times on pills. I hope anyone who needs help gets it

  • @jonmilburn5259
    @jonmilburn5259 4 года назад +21

    When we do the relapse call at our AA chapter, we say it is a Desire chip.........the Desire to stay sober for 24 hrs. That's for the newcomer. Then we say "does anyone need to trade a wet one in for a dry one?" ....that's the call for stepping up and admitting you slipped / relapsed. Everybody applauds for either so there's zero shaming

  • @830audio6
    @830audio6 3 года назад +38

    I relapsed friday after almost a year and a half sober. Thanks for this. No matter how good you think you are, that addiction is in the back doin fuckin pull ups and push ups ready to fuckin take you down at the most random times.

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  3 года назад +6

      Hi Mitchell, don't spend too much time beating yourself up. You can get right back on track!

    • @oc3694
      @oc3694 3 года назад +2

      Unless you you are still drinking, or using you had a lapse not relapse!

    • @grilledchiken4038
      @grilledchiken4038 3 года назад +1

      I’m 15 and just relapsed today and I’ve been sober for 145 days I feel like a failure

    • @jennytaylor2751
      @jennytaylor2751 3 года назад +4

      @@grilledchiken4038 don’t quit quitting. My spouse bounces back and forth but progress is progress. Try to learn from the slip ups and make corrections instead of letting shame beat you down

    • @ThePlanesEnt
      @ThePlanesEnt 3 года назад +2

      Hope you’re doing okay man. I just relapsed after 6 1/2 months and it’s been torture! Gotta grow and learn from it

  • @heatherjohnson333
    @heatherjohnson333 Год назад +8

    I relapsed two days ago after 7 months clean. Last night, I stopped myself. I threw the drugs in the toilet and smashed my paraphernalia because I was afraid I would wake up today and use again. I felt overwhelming guilt and loneliness today and I just didn't know how to feel better. Thank you for this video. It helped to put it into perspective and see that I DO have 7 months of healthy living behind me and I won't have to start all over like the last time I quit after 5 years of straight use. Thank you so much for this video!

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  Год назад +1

      Wow! Getting rid of the rest was such a strong move! Very impressive 🤩

    • @heatherjohnson333
      @heatherjohnson333 Год назад

      @@PutTheShovelDown Thank you!

  • @danielmller2280
    @danielmller2280 3 года назад +37

    I had 2 months of sobriety, don't even know what happened but yesterday I fell in again
    Feeling really disappointed but there's only one way and That's forward 💪
    Thanks for the video

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  3 года назад +5

      That's right Daniel. Today is a new day, and all you have to do is get right back up and move forward. Don't let a little slip mess up all your good progress!

    • @damienhall2917
      @damienhall2917 3 года назад +3

      That’s the same thing that I just did my brother!! You asked the question for me. Thank you and good luck with your Recovery ❤️

    • @damienhall2917
      @damienhall2917 3 года назад +3

      @@PutTheShovelDown Thank you so much for your wisdom and knowledge of this addiction my family and I are dealing with. Your reply to Daniel was perfect for me too! God bless you for all you are doing!! 💜❤️💜

    • @TheBrewsterMillion
      @TheBrewsterMillion 3 года назад +2

      Same here,did rehab and all. Then boom relasp.

    • @damienhall2917
      @damienhall2917 3 года назад +1

      @@TheBrewsterMillion we can’t dwell on the relapse...it happens. I let my kids down but I had to pick myself up and move forward. The Relapse was a lesson not a mistake. I called my Sponsor and he helped me get my head back in the game. Good luck my brother!

  • @honestjohnt87
    @honestjohnt87 3 года назад +13

    Thank you, Amber. “Don’t get on the roller coaster” is my new self motto.

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  3 года назад +2

      That's right, John... Don't get on that coaster no matter how tempting!

  • @tamz3653
    @tamz3653 3 года назад +8

    It was really nice hearing basically that - if someone was good for 185 days & then messed up for a second one day / the 185 days are not erased 👏 forget about the one off day & move on to 186 -- ((( you are correct t too - the Bible even teaches / we need accountability people

  • @anandadaquino3604
    @anandadaquino3604 Год назад +4

    I relapsed after 22 months, during one night. This Brazilian here who got sober on zoom was crying so much and wanna thank you for saying that my 22 months were real. I can't delete them. I told my sponsor, my mom, and we will recalculate to be back on track! Thank you

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  Год назад +1

      I'm so glad to hear this was helpful. You don't have to let one slip up knock you off track. You got this!

  • @AwesomeEpicnes
    @AwesomeEpicnes 3 года назад +9

    I bought a pack of cigarettes for the first time in 30 days yesterday and I didn’t know how to process/deal with this. Thank you so much for this video

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  3 года назад

      Don't let that get you down. You can get right back on track!

  • @makailynthesizzler
    @makailynthesizzler 3 года назад +5

    My boyfriend relapsed after 3 years sobriety. I never dealt with this and this has helped me understand so much

  • @NB-sq7ui
    @NB-sq7ui 3 года назад +6

    I relapsed after 21 days of no binge drinking at weekends..I had 4 or 5 bottles of beer at a friends house was offered other recreational drugs too bit thankfully dudnt succumb and left the scene..Next day I exer used heavily as I usually do to counteract it..Beating myself up about it..But been 2 days sober now so I'm back on the wagon now determined to see it through this time , last time I realpsed after 3 weeks too..

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  3 года назад +1

      Good for you NB! You can pick up your recovery right where you left off!

  • @heartbasedresearchtoajourn8158
    @heartbasedresearchtoajourn8158 3 года назад +6

    I did a relapse after 4 months but the funny thing was I did not really want to do it, I was running boxing eating well and my friend died and then I decided to have a drink for him, what i learnt was I did enjoy it it took my out of my routine I did not feel good it just was not the same again, I got up after 4 day binge I ran 16 mile next day back and the next day I done boxing strait back into my routine, I feel it gets eaiser the longer u go.

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  3 года назад +2

      I love that you got yourself right back on track!

  • @sherylkilpatrick1727
    @sherylkilpatrick1727 4 года назад +10

    I drove my son to rehab again Wednesday. He made the arrangements this time. But yes he gets the "F its" with relapses and falls down the rabbit hole all over again.
    Going to share this and hope he can/will watch it.

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  4 года назад +3

      Hopefully it will help him stop beating himself down. That only makes things worse.

    • @nikitaw1982
      @nikitaw1982 3 года назад

      F it's. Lol. That's me.

  • @jerzecandy
    @jerzecandy Год назад +4

    thanks for this video, 45 days sober after 43 years of using . Did 3 weeks PHP then Sober living got Covid left House and went home. Relapsed this is the second week. Put my self in a outpatient PHP but I can’t get off this rollercoaster. I’m going to start today

  • @richardthayer2210
    @richardthayer2210 2 года назад +4

    I think the hardest part about it is admitting I can't just have one...because sometimes in the past I have had one and not binged but now it's different .The snake is showing his head.Years ago I could pick him up but now he bites me Everytime.

  • @smilinkylen5621
    @smilinkylen5621 11 месяцев назад +6

    Went 6 years without a drink and spent the last year and a half battling off and on relapses. Its hell on earth. I am done drinking again

  • @Eddie_Jo_Torres17
    @Eddie_Jo_Torres17 3 года назад +3

    Thank you soooo much for your video!!!! I have been sober for over 90 days and I just relapsed once. I did come to feel and think the worst. Thank you

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  3 года назад

      My pleasure Eduard! I'm really glad this video was helpful to you

  • @charlieb4050
    @charlieb4050 2 года назад +9

    Relapsed last night drinking. Ugh I was doing so well. I have so much guilt today is overwhelming 😩😔

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  2 года назад +4

      The fact that you're watching this video is a sign that you're already getting back on track! 💖

  • @toddkimberlin7609
    @toddkimberlin7609 3 года назад +6

    Thanks so much for this I’ve been sober for almost two years and a week ago relapsed got fired from my job and fell down the rabbit hole but I pulled the emergency brake so to speak and am trying my best to get back on track immediately this video really helped god bless you

  • @roxy7255
    @roxy7255 2 года назад +3

    I can’t thank you enough for your videos amber I have been dealing with my partners addiction for three years using your strategies the last three months has made all the difference. This time when he relapsed I didn’t freak out and he even messaged saying me understanding meant things were much better.

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  2 года назад +1

      I'm giving you an A++++++! Very impressive 💯💯💯 It's not easy to keep your cool in situations like that 🤩

    • @JTG313
      @JTG313 Год назад +1

      When I relapsed and my mom said "I'm not even mad at you...I just want you to get help"

  • @IIISWILIII
    @IIISWILIII Год назад +1

    Almost 2 months dry. Messed up yesterday. Wasn't just 1 or 2... A complete nose dive. Not giving up.

  • @bjharvey3021
    @bjharvey3021 2 года назад +2

    This is amazing advice. Thank you. I watch your channel most days and it's so easy to listen to my naughty side doesn't get triggerred like a lot of addiction videos. You deserve more recognition. Keep it up.

  • @rhianng9981
    @rhianng9981 3 месяца назад

    The difference between lapse vs relapse. A great reminder & a great help to put a slip in perspective when ur in it and feeling worthless

  • @lisasnyder8405
    @lisasnyder8405 Год назад +1

    Oh my goodness Thank you so much Amber! This is awesome! I see how other people are treated in my meetings when they go out and it is hard to come back . I had 35 days and drank again. I do not want to give up or die from this disease
    My friend went out after 4 years and lied about it because they way she was treated. She has 5 years now. This is exactly how I'm feeling.

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  Год назад

      Your welcome, Lisa! Don't let a little slip keep you down. No one can take away your 365 days!

  • @kkl4815
    @kkl4815 10 месяцев назад +2

    I really needed this video today. 10 months AF and I drank last week.

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  10 месяцев назад

      No one can take your 10 months away. Don't give up. Just keep moving forward 💖

  • @refri17ner95
    @refri17ner95 3 года назад +5

    Been thru alot In the last 6 years in my addiction to meth and crack. Last August I had 2 years of sobriety. I released August 2020 for a few days. Immediately moved into sober living. I stayed clean 6 months becoming a house manager. 3 weeks ago I moved out of sober living and now rent a room in someone's house. Alot of things changed and I felt overwhelmed. I drank a beer, bought a bottle of liquor, and within 2 days I was smoking meth and crack. Its week three and I have been using alot non stop. Shit sux.

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  3 года назад +4

      Don't give up. You know what works for you.

    • @bryanlopez4994
      @bryanlopez4994 2 года назад +1

      I know the feeling and just relapsed and did a whole of blow and alcohol a little bit of crack and some ecstasy it was one hell of a binge . I’m done with the binge day one but the worst part of all of it is that I crashed my dads truck and he passed away a couple of months ago . I still know that I’m not gonna give up and I’m gonna feel like shit but it’s all mental just gotta get your head clear for a bit and stay busy .

    • @refri17ner95
      @refri17ner95 2 года назад

      @@bryanlopez4994 damn bro. I'm sorry about your dad. Sometimes I think it's about self acceptance on our own for us. We aren't bad people. We just can't face our reality sober sometimes. Your not alone

  • @Jack-il3qv
    @Jack-il3qv 5 месяцев назад +2

    If you keep saving up your resentments you'll soon have enough for a relapse.

  • @ms-zl9qf
    @ms-zl9qf Год назад +1

    Thank you for this video I drank this week and I am so disappointed in myself I can't even look at the mirror. I don't have a mentor I don't have a sober person in my life to talk to or listen but this video did help keep me just hope

  • @giselanovoa2961
    @giselanovoa2961 3 года назад +7

    This has been so helpful. Thank you

  • @saraclements8476
    @saraclements8476 2 года назад +2

    Thank you for your amazing videos. My son is in recovery and your videos have been really helpful to me.

  • @gretabecker5303
    @gretabecker5303 3 года назад +3

    I was in middle of relapse and came across your video. I just flushed what lil I had left....thank u

  • @gregpowell4399
    @gregpowell4399 2 года назад +8

    I just relapsed after 5 yrs and I'm in denial. I'm a pillar in recovery community and I am scared to get honest😢

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  2 года назад +8

      It sounds like you're not in denial, but just scared to take the steps to move forward. Admitting you relapsed and getting back on track will only make you more of a pillar in the recovery community. Others need to see people who fall and pick themselves back up. You can do this!

    • @lisasnyder8405
      @lisasnyder8405 Год назад +2

      This happened to my friend. She finally got honest after a year because she felt really bad about lying but has 4 years now again and is doing great

    • @gregpowell4399
      @gregpowell4399 Год назад

      @@lisasnyder8405 I am celebrating 10 months this wk. My relapse was more of a lil stumble. 1 use and back on the wagon. Not justifying,but grateful I didn't go full force. Thanx for that response

  • @mrcat2359
    @mrcat2359 4 года назад +7

    Functional Analysis would be very helpful. We just had this situation happen with my son using acid at a sober living house, and did the don’ts. If there a way to start over after a big blow up mistake with your addict that would be so helpful.

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  4 года назад +2

      Great question and good insight Maureen! If you feel you made a mistake then just go to him and say that you feel you handled the situation wrong. Let him know that you regret the way you reactive and that you're trying to recover too! It's a really great thing to model humility. Often it opens the door for them to admit their wrongs.

    • @markustran777
      @markustran777 2 года назад

      Lsd is a non even anti-addictive substance tho?

  • @misscommunication6270
    @misscommunication6270 3 года назад +3

    I found this helpful. I was an alcoholic for 3 years, and I'm currently in recovery. Well, kind of. I'm allowing myself to drink one or two at the most days out of the week as of right now, or drink socially, because I feel like I'm personally able to handle that. But the other days of the week I find myself struggling with thoughts like "I want a drink" or "is it that bad if i have a drink." To be fair I was never an out of control alcoholic, no withdrawals or anything. It was more of a habit, which is why I'm giving myself leniency, and it's working great. But the other days are a little bit difficult. Planning on getting to one day every 2 weeks

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  3 года назад +1

      It sounds like you've made a ton of progress and you're continuing to work on things!

    • @misscommunication6270
      @misscommunication6270 3 года назад

      @@PutTheShovelDown I'm glad you think so! I was really worried that I would be shamed for still allowing myself to drink 😅

  • @dionel8
    @dionel8 2 года назад +7

    I slipped/ relapsed after almost 2 years. I'm in AA and I have a sponsor. I think AA is a good program, but I don't agree with the idea that you have to start at day 1 again. I think it's destructive psychologically. I told my sponsor, and I feel it's enough. What is your opinion on this?

    • @lisasnyder8405
      @lisasnyder8405 Год назад

      You didn't lose that time . Your body knows you had that break.❤

  • @bbelizy9627
    @bbelizy9627 2 года назад +1

    Thank you! I found you this morning. You are very reassuring, and calming me down.

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  2 года назад

      Hi B, welcome to our little community! So glad you're here 😁

  • @carmenbrown3437
    @carmenbrown3437 Год назад +1

    I know what I should do next time. Sit quiet. Write it out until sanity returns. Even if it takes all day. Instead of catastrophizing.

  • @TheBrewsterMillion
    @TheBrewsterMillion 3 года назад +2

    I relasped after 2months now i have fight a coutcase and cant go home, quickly homeless and a matter of a day. Now im alone at a hotel. Honestly thinking about drinking right now. I dont want To go to jail

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  3 года назад +1

      Hi Brewster, Don't give up! I have a 30 Day Jump Start Program I give to my client. It's just short video messages that come to you everyday to keep you motivated and help you overcome roadblocks. Here's a link that will let you get that for free. hope it helps: www.familyrecoveryacademy.online/30-day-jump-start

    • @NB-sq7ui
      @NB-sq7ui 3 года назад

      @@PutTheShovelDown Many thanks! I need this too ..

  • @corrlee
    @corrlee 3 года назад +4

    I got to say it somewhere..I sobered up at age 25 I had an unusual case of severe alcoholism from a very young age. Just trust me lol! Fast forward 16 years later and I slipped! Been back at it over a year! It sux it’s daily not as bad as before but def no good! I stayed clean all those years for my kids my dad for others it was a promise I made my mission! My kids are grown dad is dead child support is paid in full ect..So I tricked myself said it’s time to relax lol!I suddenly I’m unhealthy lookin old now more than ever just not good ya know? I got to find a new mission yall!?? (Don’t say me that won’t work lol)

    • @gailmartindale
      @gailmartindale Год назад

      I have heard that a lot of addicts get long term recovery by giving back to the sober community and doing acts of service. I am the parent of an addict and I can see how self centered this disease makes him. He is a young 24 year, single guy and has no kids, no girl friend, and all of his actions are just so focused on himself. He drinks so much he can't even hold a job.

  • @polkprincess2714
    @polkprincess2714 2 года назад +1

    4 relapses this year so far.....I feel like it’s always going to be a roller coaster....what’s worse ...trying to make it on a single income or making it with a dual income...but not really ever feeling stable.??? Even when he is not popping pills....in the back of my mind I still think he is. I find it difficult to relax and feel safe.

  • @johannamaldonado30
    @johannamaldonado30 10 месяцев назад

    i was sober for 3 months after drinking all my life i;m 43 i been drinking every nite after i go to the gym ,hopefully today is a new day

  • @darcyturnbo4724
    @darcyturnbo4724 3 года назад +4

    Thanks for the advice, it’s really helpful.

  • @truepenny2514
    @truepenny2514 4 месяца назад +1

    very helpful, thanks!!

  • @TMichelle555
    @TMichelle555 Год назад +1

    I had a month. Drank yesterday, this is going to be harder than I thought

  • @peppersghosttheater
    @peppersghosttheater 3 года назад +3

    Well I failed that. I freaked out. After 3 years sober, tens of thousands on rehab's. One year of complete hard core drinking like I've never seen.

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  3 года назад

      If your still alive, your still in the game. It isn't too late!

    • @peppersghosttheater
      @peppersghosttheater 3 года назад

      @@PutTheShovelDown thanks, I meant my husband. I completely lost it with him. My patience is gone. Im not sure the trust will ever return.

  • @maddyG7414
    @maddyG7414 2 года назад +2

    I relapsed for several weeks. It’s almost like I thought I could handle casually using. Then it spiral to not casual. I was in denial. It doesn’t feel good.

  • @AMM3.
    @AMM3. 3 года назад +1

    Recently I've had a close family member go missing and presumably dead (another victim of addiction and the situations it leads to)😭 so now 2 of my family members who I've always thought were over addiction are relapsing hard.. these are my sober heroes.. and I don't even blame them.. it's a really painful situation.. I don't want to come down on them about sobriety when their dealing with detectives and no sleep.. I'm trying to remind them their going to be physically and mentally addicted in no time.. praying that all my midnight conversations with them will help.. but I have a terrible feeling this situation will lead to more than 1 death 😭

  • @user-zz3vb8tk5x
    @user-zz3vb8tk5x 11 месяцев назад

    Within 24 hours of finding out a family member was a drug addict . We surprised him and tried to force inpatient therapy on him. It was nothing but a battle he had already checked himself into outpatient therapy, but we didn’t think that was good enough. We really ruined our relationships.

  • @paulacate448
    @paulacate448 4 года назад +2

    Always timely and helpful videos, Amber. Thank you so much for sharing your insight!

  • @cjgia4898
    @cjgia4898 4 года назад +4

    So, I still missed this live. Ugh. I will try again next week. Thursday's at 1 EST, right?
    I rejoined Facebook so I don't miss a thing.
    Yes, to functional analysis, please.

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  4 года назад +1

      You got it. 1pm Eastern. We usually try to make a reminder post on FB. Sorry we missed you!

  • @roxy7255
    @roxy7255 2 года назад +3

    Found this super helpful though still working hard on the not freaking out part! How do you find the balance between being supportive whilst still trying to reinforce the boundary that it’s not acceptable to use in the house?

  • @armandomeza2299
    @armandomeza2299 3 года назад +2

    I'm so tiered of using drugs it destroyed my life. And my kids don't deserve a drug addict for a father I can't continue with my life ...

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  3 года назад +1

      Hi Armando, Don't give up. I've seen people come back from the most devastating places. I I have a 30 Day Jump Start Program that my clients get. It's just short video messages that come to you everyday to keep you motivated and help you overcome roadblocks. Here's a link that will let you get that for free. hope it helps: www.familyrecoveryacademy.online/30-day-jump-start

  • @Drug_Fueled_Nightmare
    @Drug_Fueled_Nightmare 3 года назад +6

    Addictions so hard especially when you can go to any store I'm america and get your drug of choice and no one stops you they'll sell it to you I've been on and off for 5 years and I try my best but I still fall back into the trap even tho I know better

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  3 года назад +2

      The difference in success and failure is ONE MORE TRY! You got this😉

    • @nikitaw1982
      @nikitaw1982 3 года назад

      They get so much tax too and rarely see alc reduction programs advertised. Be good if they had cheap food so drink less.

    • @Drug_Fueled_Nightmare
      @Drug_Fueled_Nightmare 3 года назад

      @@nikitaw1982 fuck it cut it off and spend some dough on some real food

    • @mitchellyarborough1791
      @mitchellyarborough1791 3 года назад +1

      Get it at any store ? Shit where is the heroin isle Bc ig Iv been missing it

  • @buffy6673
    @buffy6673 10 месяцев назад

    My partner has been sober for 61 days and then on his 62nd day his psychiatrist had forgotten to cancel his old benzo prescription. So when he got to the pharmacy, they had already filled it out and he felt like oh well. It was prescribed once by a doctor. He did tell me right after he took two pills. my first reaction was shock and upset and then I went to the Internet to try and find a better response. He hasn’t quite acknowledged it as a relapse yet because he still sees it as prescribed medication but it was obviously the doctor slip up. His psychiatrist does not want him to be on that medication and he knows that.

  • @janicewilson1190
    @janicewilson1190 2 года назад +1

    Listening to you from Scotland: thanks good information x

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  2 года назад

      Awesome! Thank you! Glad you're here, Janice 😁

  • @YouKnowImRight99
    @YouKnowImRight99 Год назад +1

    Thank you for this video!!!❤

  • @samuelcimatti7990
    @samuelcimatti7990 2 года назад +1

    I've relapsed after half a year and it's really bad it's my second day sober after a month straight of drugs and just trying to look for help

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  2 года назад

      Day 2 is a really tough one. Much respect for all your hard work!

  • @JonathanCoates89
    @JonathanCoates89 11 месяцев назад +1

    Extremely valuable insight! Subscribed! 😊

  • @Joaocruz30
    @Joaocruz30 3 года назад +1

    I AM TRYING. BUT WITH MY DAD DEATH 3 MONTHS AGO I WENT INTO AUTODESTRUCTION MODE. Thank you so much

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  3 года назад +1

      The fact that your watching this video, tells me that you're trying to get back on track!

    • @Joaocruz30
      @Joaocruz30 3 года назад

      @@PutTheShovelDown I really wish I can jesus you made me cry. I'm sorry

    • @chirondawn2966
      @chirondawn2966 2 года назад

      I lost my dad to liver failure on Jan 6, 2022 he was an alcohol addict . I am sorry for the pain you feel and the struggle your in. Your not alone. Im here with u.

  • @kellyhoxsey6827
    @kellyhoxsey6827 7 месяцев назад

    Excellent feedback, thank you

  • @paulasuprenant6728
    @paulasuprenant6728 3 года назад +1

    Thank you for your helpful videos Amber.😃

  • @katelynolsen1575
    @katelynolsen1575 Год назад +1

    You are an angel 😇

  • @homelessinALBQ
    @homelessinALBQ 3 года назад +2

    I had 6 months and relapsed last night... Alcohol is my drug of choice... I don’t wanna go back to a AA meeting and get my 24 hour chip... ugh this sucks...

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  3 года назад

      Watching this video is a great step toward getting back on track. It shows me how determined you are!!!

  • @PartsUnknownn
    @PartsUnknownn 3 месяца назад

    I feel like if you don’t make yourself completely start over because of a relapse then the chance for more relapses in the future is more likely. If you give yourself a pass it makes it too easy to just sweep your slip-ups under the rug. If you have to start over then there’s way more to lose. All your progress being at stake would deter me from having “just one drink, it doesn’t count”
    Just my thoughts.

  • @DEADIKATED
    @DEADIKATED Год назад +1

    I went all January with no Liquor and pretty much drank all of February I’m going to quit again

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  Год назад

      Good for you! Pick yourself back up, and get right back on track 💌

  • @akitoelgoog251
    @akitoelgoog251 3 года назад +2

    I started using and it's been 4 days now in a row after 3 months clean.
    What can I do to not go further..

  • @lifeisgr82me
    @lifeisgr82me 2 года назад

    Yes please on the Functional analysis

  • @jennytaylor2751
    @jennytaylor2751 3 года назад +1

    Would love access the the functional analysis you spoke of. Ty❤️. Love love all your advise. My loved one is making great progress and so am I

  • @miriamhunt9008
    @miriamhunt9008 2 года назад +1

    Do you talk to them at all when they are in the rows of relapse?

  • @miriamhunt9008
    @miriamhunt9008 2 года назад +1

    Do you talk to them while they are drinking

  • @spiritualwisdom515
    @spiritualwisdom515 10 месяцев назад +1

    Off topic, i really love your eyes. 😊

  • @nicolenicole3142
    @nicolenicole3142 Год назад +1

    I’ve been clean 8 yrs. I was using for 1.5. I signed up for counseling did five years and learned a lot about in that time.I’ve been so depressed every Christmas i have trauma that i can’t get out of my mind. I have so much going on I’m responsible for all bills, I clean house after adult children, i lost several close family/friends recently, my mom cancer hasn’t shrank after year half treatment 😢 regardless of all my hardship I have had a nervous breakdown and struggle to cope with right now. I started using around mid November Im not using everyday but I have used. I’ve been hiding this secret and it’s messed with my heart & mind. I hate looking In mirror lately I just want to be someone else😔 I need to learn how to love myself and deal with my trauma find ways to help with my depression health and bipolar. Nobody talks to me without getting angry. There entitled to there feelings. When I try to express how I’m feeling, what causes me to relapse & how can we fix. I stay secluding to myself not by choice. I recently started to hang out with three friends that have been in my life for over 35 years. I enjoy talking to them and expressing my thoughts with out judgement. I told them about my relapsed and every time I leave to get away from my negative household, I’m being accused of things that I am actually not doing I am not blaming anyone for my choices. being a recovering addict having someone blame you for something you’re not doing really hurts.I am so ashamed of myself. I’m trying so hard to work on me and love me more but everyone is putting me down calling me names and not trying to understand me. What can I do please feel free to leave. any suggestions I really could use someone else perspective. How how can I repair? What should i do any advice. I want respect and to feel appreciated I needed life up not made to feel worse than i already do

  • @joylujan593
    @joylujan593 4 года назад +4

    I would be interested in a functional analysis video, Amber.

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  4 года назад

      Okay awesome, Joy I'll get on that!

    • @joylujan593
      @joylujan593 4 года назад

      @@PutTheShovelDown thank you. I'm not sure I can find the words to convey how much your videos have meant to me over the past several weeks. They're great and bring me SO much comfort and insight. THANK YOU for being so amazing.

  • @Lakerfanva757
    @Lakerfanva757 3 года назад +2

    This really helped

  • @danakrebs1196
    @danakrebs1196 2 года назад +1

    Yes I would love any information

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  2 года назад +1

      Is there any specific information you need Dana?

    • @danakrebs1196
      @danakrebs1196 2 года назад

      @@PutTheShovelDown the appropriate things to say to support my son & not make him feel more shame

  • @W1LDWESLEY
    @W1LDWESLEY 2 года назад

    Friend relapsed on "glass" a week ago. He's like purple gru minion. He has a negative view of his family giving his dog away if he goes to rehab

  • @Alex-wm5jq
    @Alex-wm5jq 3 года назад

    i relapsed after nearly five months and i feel so much worse than i ever did

  • @therecoveryfamily9901
    @therecoveryfamily9901 4 года назад +1

    Thank you for sharing

  • @legacy7450
    @legacy7450 2 года назад +1

    This is brilliant

  • @woofielove1970
    @woofielove1970 2 года назад +1

    So my girlfriend is coming home from being in jail for a year because of her third DUI. She has been in and out of numerous rehabs. The other day I said to her, you need to never ever drink again, not once, not even one drop. Please never ever drink again. She said to me that you should not make a statement like this one alcoholic because you are setting them up for failure. Is this true? Please help! Is it appropriate to tell someone who is an alcoholic and currently not drinking that they can never ever touch alcohol again not even one drop. Is that appropriate? I don't see why not. It's the truth.

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  2 года назад +1

      There is a concept in recovery called "One Day At A Time". Many people in recovery are encouraged not to think about the idea of not drinking forever because it feels overwhelming. Instead they're taught to focus on staying sober one day at a time.

    • @woofielove1970
      @woofielove1970 2 года назад

      @@PutTheShovelDown thank you!

  • @W1LDWESLEY
    @W1LDWESLEY 2 года назад

    I'm 1/2 people that's trying to help a relapsing friend vent whose getting eviction notice

  • @mr8966
    @mr8966 Год назад

    Thank-you.

  • @TheNmv2728
    @TheNmv2728 Год назад

    Please make a video

  • @user-zz9hu2vx3g
    @user-zz9hu2vx3g Год назад +1

    Today is day one

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  Год назад

      That's great! 🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩💯💯💯🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

  • @dustbae
    @dustbae 4 года назад +3

    Functional analysis video would be great!

  • @shandasturtevant1019
    @shandasturtevant1019 Год назад

    What do you do when your partner denies they’ve relapsed when they’re barely functioning, passing out, etc.

  • @JTG313
    @JTG313 Год назад

    My problem is i drink from sober to blackouts i dont even get tipsy or drunk first

  • @BigKmaniac
    @BigKmaniac 2 года назад +2

    I can't relapae if I don't lapse

  • @rhianng9981
    @rhianng9981 3 месяца назад

    Re-routing! 🙄😅

  • @shanechapman2415
    @shanechapman2415 2 года назад

    Please make a video around the questions we should ask

  • @booshting3520
    @booshting3520 3 года назад +1

    My GF just relapsed after 2 months sobriety. Gutted

    • @PutTheShovelDown
      @PutTheShovelDown  3 года назад

      Hi Boosh, Take a look at this video. I think it might be helpful for you: ruclips.net/video/0pP6DnBK6qE/видео.html

  • @eliv8916
    @eliv8916 Год назад

    What if he is denying that he is secretly drinking? (functioning alcoholic)

  • @anuvarma9435
    @anuvarma9435 Год назад

    What if the addict wants to stop naltrexone after 15 days n wants to start bupinorphene...What does it mean.....Is he still in denial?

  • @ShalumiYashraal81
    @ShalumiYashraal81 4 года назад +1

    New subscriber. Thank you