The wedding dress story had an update: OP's sister wore the dress on her wedding day, so the "friend" showed up at the wedding venue saying the wedding dress was stolen from her. The groom and guests asked if she had proof this was originally her dress which she didn't have. Then the grandmother or aunt from the groom's side stood up to share she was the original seamstress and she made it for OP's mother. Turns out the friend was selling vintage clothes to make extra money and was trying to sell OP's dress.
I love how rSlash went on a rant about reading book and although his favorite book was a classic, that didn't mean he didn't read anything else, but forgot the part where his literal job is reading
Yes, but they were specifically talking about reading books. So I can see why he wouldn't connect the two. I appreciate his comments. My favorite books are all decades old.
Wedding dress story: OP texted “I found the dress.” The friend responded “Why did you go rummaging through my closet?” Yeah she knew exactly where the dress was. She was just trying to steal it. NTA and she is not your friend.
It's worse than that. The "friend" crashed the wedding and demanded the dress back saying she stole it, and the grandmother who made the dress forbid her from taking it. Said "friend" had the dress listed for sale online and had been trying to get a big payday from it.
@@VeldrusaraWhere’d you find the update? I checked on Reddit, including AmItheDoormat that someone else suggested, and could find nothing about an update.
Hi, former nuclear mechanic from the Navy. That school is HARD to get through. The school takes about 2 years to get though. Most of the people I met in there either already had degrees or HAD at least attended college for a brief time. A lot of people who join the military do so because they lack other options or the financial ability to go to college. That doesn't mean they are not intelligent. I dropped out of college so I could use the military benefits to pay for my school instead. And guess what? I DID that. I'm not uneducated. I got through one of the hardest schools in the entire military AND still managed to get my bachelor's after I got out. OP is the asshole for belittling her husband's intelligence and acting like a formal education is the only qualifier for intelligence.
Shit even MOS's that dumbasses like me can do aren't a joke to go through. I was a combat engineer in the Marines, and our schoolhouse covers a wide curriculum, from airfield repair and bridging to explosives and mine/ied sweeping. There's almost too much information to retain as a combat engineer, not to mention the added pressure of nervous excitement the first time you handle real explosives.
Many in my family are military. Lots of the training they did are equivalent to college education and include certifications that are used by colleges to count towards classes. On top of that, I learned while my husband was serving, that college courses are offered through their branch. It’s an insult to look at someone who served time in the military as less intelligent and educated. Plus it’s not like he doesn’t read. He’s reading manuals for very complex equipment. How does that not count?
Even if he had some manual labour job it still doesn't matter. His wife was was a b1tch to say what she said, and even worse to have a good ole laugh about it with her tosser friends. Her and her friends sound like dreadful snooty people.
Sad that she missed out on critical thinking in her schooling, because as you point out she is evaluating something she has zero knowledge of to someone who has direct knowledge. Like you I have done both and can say that for me, college has a breadth of knowledge whereas military training has depth. I value both for their own sakes, but would never try to compare them this way.
Story 3: yta for throwing your husband under the bus over a terrible joke and being super snobbish about education alongside your friend who asked the question, apologise now or risk a divorce.
The man is presumably an engineer for the nuclear reactor on a freaking submarine. Imagine the arrogance in thinking that is somehow less difficult or educated than being in college.
adding to this, like I said in my post. 88% of the so called "collage educated" morons wouldn't comprehend even 1% of the math and tech that a nuke class has to understand.
14:00 That friend was absolutely malicious. OP didn’t initially mention the closet. The only reason the friend would get mad was if she knew it was in the closet
According to another commenter, the story got updated. The "friend" crashed the wedding trying to get it back, got called out BY THE ONE WHO MADE IT and it turned out the "friend" was trying to sell the dress off as she sold vintage dresses.
@@xKCAZxLEADERRUclips makes that easy enough lol I can’t even criticize anyones political opinions without getting temporarily banned for 24 hrs for cyber bullying so if you’re conservative good luck but if you fit into their political agenda as a “perpetual victim” then it should be easy enough just email them and use a bunch of social justice buzzwords
The "friend" in the 5th story didn't lose anything. She was definitely going to keep that wedding dress. That's why she offered to pay for it and was mad that OP found it.
Apparently in an update, the (ex)friend tried to crash OP's wedding but got out by THE ONE WHO MADE THE DRESS. The friend was kicked out and as it turned out...she was definitely going to keep the dress to sell it as a Vintage item. Talk about absolute scum.
@@Xolivas1That update more than likely never happened, due to nobody being able to confirm it and due to how the OOP only had one comment other than their post which was just about how she thought the friend wouldn’t look for the dress again.
@@Xolivas1 There is no update. marychoppins/hiking engineer lied and made up the fanfic "update" to promote the new subreddit they mod for (r/amithediirmat)
Story 3: Military education IS college equivalent. I know a couple former US Navy nuke techs, and my wife lost that school as a discipline problem. That school is NO JOKE. Don't get me started on pilots and medical officers... (Seven-year US Army vet here)
@spectrelead As a civilian bartender in the mess in the CAF, I know exactly how much work all specialists in the forces go through especially pilots, engineers and those who become our astronauts. Submarine officers are insanely trained. 5 bucks says that woman is your stereotypical depends wife .
My family is Navy all the way and I got so mad at OP being like "lawl he's not well educated' because like, bruh, do you have any idea how much goes into sub crews because you're literally in a bubble under water, there is NO room for mistakes down there.
The thing is, by her own recollection, she didn't specify "college education." She straight up said "Oh, my husband isn't educated! Tee-hee!" Then, when he complained, she tries to back-pedal and say, "Oh, no, no... I only meant that your education was _different."_
On the college savings one. If it’s a dedicated college fund they are taxed way less than normal bank accounts and if the money isn’t used for college you have to back pay taxes.
Story 3: You can tell the wife and her friends hold the common misconception that formal college education equals intelligence. She went out of her way to make her (very accomplished) husband the brunt of a cruel joke in a social situation over To Kill a Mockingbird? Like, how do your friends assume that liking that one book means your husband "only read books in high school"? I have a sneaking suspicion that this isn't the first time OP has spoken poorly with her friends about her husband, just the first time he was there to witness it.
@@LilDevyl17hell she could’ve said, “Yeah reading isn’t a hobby of his.” She could’ve even gone the extra mile and said, “What’s wrong with that?” There isn’t anything wrong with not reading in your spare time; it’s like getting huffy someone isn’t into knitting or gardening. Instead of backing her husband up and showing a minuscule amount of grace, she showed her ass and told him what she really thinks of him. Now she’s trying to backpedal and gaslight him further by saying, “Oh you’re just reacting this way because you misunderstood me. I didn’t call you an idiot (she did). I just told the you aren’t college educated (she didn’t).” What gets me is that her husband went through one of the hardest schools you can go through in the navy, works one of the hardest jobs a sailor can have, and she’s the one calling _him_ stupid? The guy is probably smarter than a majority of the people in that room. Attributing intelligence to only having a degree is something only an idiot would think.
I’m almost done with my college degree and to be honest, I haven’t read a complete book since high school. Although I am stupid as hell for completely non-book related reasons.
Wedding dress story the only mistake OP did was text the friend who we all know was intentionally keeping the dress for herself, that she found the dress
Apparently, theres an update where the "friend" went to the sister's wedding and tried to claim the dress was stolen from her. Then the groom's grandmother revealed she was the original seamstress of the dress. The "friend" was also apparently selling vintage dresses online, so that's why she tried to keep it.
Story 3 could also be called "AITA for calling my husband stupid?" Yes OP you are the AH! 3/5!! I'd love to see you fix a NUCLEAR REACTOR College Girl!!
@@lorilancaster5917 Same!! Working on Nuclear Reactors require a mastery of Math, Physics and possibly Chemistry that I doubt OP and her friends have...skills that Hubby does clearly have since it's his job
She's an idiot. She majorly insulted him in public. 🤨 I day this as both a ten year military veteran, and a voracious reader since elementary school. The simple act of reading is not a measure of intelligent, just as being online by computer or small device is no measure of literacy.
That Navy guy should say to his wife "Hey, I decided to take your friends' advice and start reading." Then hand her a book- "How to move on from divorce." Not saying he should dump her, but definitely let her know that she was WAY over the line.
The "friend's" angry reaction at the fact that OP found the dress says it all: she intentionally hid the dress and was hoping OP would forget about it or accept the payment. And speaking of payment, considering that this was a vintage dress from OP's mother, there's a 9999% chance that the amount the "friend" offered was way lower than what the dress was actually worth. That "friend" is a thief, and was malicious in every way.
You were right. Someone else commented about an update about how the "friend" confronted OP's sister at the wedding to say that the dress was stolen from her but backed off when asked for proof. _Then_ OP's grandmother, the original designer of the dress, piped up to say that's her handiwork. It turned out that the "friend" is a low-key vintage clothing seller and was trying to sell the dress.
Idk, the idea of a trip to a convention for two people costing 10k is insane to me. That's more than my two week vacation in Japan for two people. I think she should have just used the 5k that she put in. That would have been more than enough, I'm sure.
She said she would also spend two weeks in Australia, and I would assume she'll be sightseeing and doing touristy stuff, so $10K for two weeks seems appropriate to me, TBH
Idk the Idea that Id have to save Money all my Life and never be able to fun stuff because College will eat Up more than a years salary is way more insane to me.... But I am German and never Had to pay for my education... Also Australia is pretty expencive compared to the US.
Story 3: one of the smartest people I know is one step above illiterate. He builds his own computers, casually sets up multi step light systems, etc, but he hates reading with a burning passion. You could not pay the man to read a book. Reading does not equal smart
Story 3 is exactly why whenever I see a community college on someone's resume I choose them over others. CC people (like myself) are always facing an uphill battle of not being taken seriously and looked down on for not going to a big name 4 year.
Or actually tries to convince BIL to pay for the step kids. I hope OP stands her ground but it looks like divorce is in her future. I can’t see her spouse seeing his fault to where counseling could help. Plus they may not be able to afford it.
Yeah, I find it interesting that the husband suddenly has a problem with the school set up. Obviously the kids were attending different schools before the marriage. Dude has probably been planning to make this ridiculous demand the entire time. Talk about red flags... What would he do if OP had an ex who was paying for the daughter expensive school? Demand that the guy pay for his kids too? LOL
I was thinking this too. I really hated this story (also having been a picky eater myself as a child). The father dislikes that the kid is a picky eater but also punishes the kid for deciding to try something outside of their comfort zone. How is that going to help the kid try new things and potentially become less picky? He needs to accept that his kid will not like every food and encourage them to try new things without the threat of punishment if they don’t like it.
@@therealameliabedelia7821 I disagree. There are times and places for experimenting, and wasting food and money isn't the thing to do, I have sensory issues and OCD with food. (I hate specific textures and they make me vomit, as well as I have "rules" for food touching. It's long and really only makes sense to me, but they are rules that need to be followed none the less, or I panic.) But here's the deal - Encourage that experimentation when you're at home, or when you know there is someone who will eat the food the picky eater declines. Making them wait for time and place won't discourage experimenting and adding to their repertoire, unless the picky eater is also immature and wants to punish themselves in order to "punish" others. Why throw away perfectly good food, especially when OP explained in advance that he would have to eat his creation. "but it's a trend on tiktok"... And? If he actually wanted to expand his palate and not just "buh I saw it on teh tiktoks!". then he should have ripped a part of his sandwich off and placed the mac and cheese on that to taste FIRST before "ruining" the whole chicken sandwich. He wanted to ruin it, he did so, and he gets to enjoy the results of his actions.
@@therealameliabedelia7821as a picky eater myself, I always only sample something instead of going all out with stuff. It depends on time and place. At a restaurant you count your losses and just order a backup, but its chick fil a, he could’ve tried a bit of it before hand instead of going all out on it when warned not to. The son isnt an AH ofc but you can’t blame the dad for not wanting to buy more after he literally told him not to do something he decided to do anyway. You’re responsible for yourself and your actions, if you know youre a picky eater but wanna try stuff, make sure to try a bit of it instead of going all out.
@@nutellatubby1943 The son is also a child. Grown adult, yes. You make logical choices like that. A child has not necessarily reached the maturity where they realize that as an option.
First story, real quick, OP said that before marriage, her husband had said nothing about her daughter going to a fancy school so cracks are showing. Second story, OP is technically NTA but said it himself; once his daughter is 18 he can't do anything. However, I do think OP should back off if to see if his daughter can prove she's an adult or not. Let it be a big reality check for her and see if she can earn back that money.
He's 36 with 3 kids. She's 25, got pregnant at 17, but had the fortune of a loving, supportive sister who happened to have married a man with money. Like you said, he knew what her kid's education situation was and didn't quibble until he put a ring on it.
@@slytherinlibrarian3501 There wasn't any updates, just OP making some comments which is where what I said came from. I think the best thing to do would be to go directly to OP's sister and BIL and make the husband plead his case directly. That way, OP isn't putting her and her daughter at risk by being the middle woman and can bring out her husband's true colors with the pressure of basically asking for six figures of support. Either he recognizes his entitlement and apologizes, still be entitled but stop, or yell at the divorce papers he just got handed.
Exactly. If the daughter pays back the $5k she took of other people's money, then she should gain access to the account. If she doesn't, then keep the account locked. You told her the college fund wasn't for convention trips and she went behind your back.
@@MrJr1976I think you got it perfect. It's not like he isn't going to pay for her college he's just isn't letting her have access for indiscriminate spending.
@@MrJr1976 Other people's money? She took out the exact amount SHE put into it, that was HER money and he knows it. OP's just pissed he can't control her with it and she's doing something HE doesn't like.
Story 3 is wild, can't imagine telling people that my partner isn't well educated. I grew up an avid reader and continued to be all throughout college. Now that I'm an adult working full time (reading legal documents all day), I don't always want to spend my free time doing that.
Story 5: how did she know you were in her closet? And who hack something they know they need to get back under all their stuff in the back of the closet? I think she trying to make you the bad guy and blow up because when you put two and two together she's going to have to explain how did she lose something she knew was in the closet after she thoroughly looked around for two years. Don't let her make you feel bad your friend tried to steal your wedding dress.
I’m reading “to kill a mockingbird” right now, I haven’t read it in High School because it isn’t a common lecture in Argentina. But dude, this book is soooo good, why are they even trashing it?
FYI: Navy Nuclear Power School is one of the hardest schools to graduate from in the country. Like… up there with Harvard law. Dude is super smart. And probably has a higher aptitude for learning than everyone at that party, including the wife. Lol
Story 6: If Aunt has a special needs child who is fascinated with muscle cars, there is a very simple solution that requires zero entitled behavior: Rent a car from one of those specialty rental places and drive him around herself. But that would require her to bear the financial risks that OP told her about, so of course she won't do that.
How is open being ableist? The kid does not have bladder or bowl control? That is an extremely reasonable boundary to not want a 14 year old how cannot control their bowls or bladder to not ride in his vehicle.
Wedding dress story: If I was Op I’d have gone to her house and demanded that we both look in the closet and I wouldn’t let it go until I had the dress in hand.
The second story gets worse if you consider that many college fund accounts are untaxed so long as you can prove it's being used for educational purposes. If this is the case, she may have lost some money that she can't get back because the money she withdrew is subject to taxation. That being said, she did steal $5k. You can't just steal 5 grand from your parents and think everything will turn out okay. That money was the parents' money that had been designated for use with education. What's to say that she won't go to college and use all her education fund on partying or drinking or whatever in the first year I can't imagine my parents giving me access to my college fund for any reason other than paying for school supplies and tuition.
Giving the daughter access to her college fund makes OP in that story a butthole. If it was intended strictly for college, then there should have been tighter control over that money.
They say college fund, but, since OP didn't mention taxes, it's possible it's just a regular savings account they they have earmarked for college. If it was the other kind, I feel like he would have mentioned it in the post and to the daughter. I say this because, if OP's position was about the daughter being irresponsible, then adding how she screwed up taxes strengthens his argument. So, unless further evidence to the contrary, I think we have to assume it isn't the tax exempt one. Everything else is a valid point, but I still feel like the answer needs to be somewhat more tempered, as Rslash suggested. Like, cut off her access and say any college bills have to go through him? Only caveat with that is making sure OP doesn't become like some other parents from this subreddit who have used that authority to dictate where and for what the kid goes to college for. I also like the idea others have suggested of having the daughter and/or GF pay back the 5k.
I dont know how Rslash thinks "what she did wasnt sooo bad". It doesn't matter if she put 5 out of the 10k in there herself. COMMUNICATION. The fact she didn't say ANYTHING and was somehow hoping nobody would notice or bring it up?? That's TERRIBLE. That is basically betraying EVERYONE that has put money on that fund. And if there's no consequences, what's stopping her from saying "I will party my way through college, YOLO. ItS a OnE iN a lIFeTImE eXPeRiEnCE" Specially with the "IT'S MY MONEY I CAN DO WHAT I WANT WITH IT" mentality. Specially when 10k is a "chunk". Not half, as to imply there were 20k in the fund. At min there is 25k so the majority of it was NOT her doing and she's just spending it nilly willy because she doesn't need to stay "A COUPLE OF WEEKS" for a 3-4 day convention. OP is in the right, trying to show there should be more responsibility. He should only grant access back to the fund IF and AFTER she pays back the 10k like she says she will.
@@pretzelicious4200I agree - punishment should be that, okay since she can't be trusted, she doesn't have access to it anymore. Idk why her mom and grandma are fine with her literally breaking the rules despite being told no on the topic, and now that's she's getting what she wants, she's learning it's okay to keep doing this. Disobey mom and dad, steal the money that's intended for her education to do what she wants. I say, OP leaves her down the $10k, so when shes in school, she will realize the depth that money costed. Congratulations daughter, you got rid of money for your future for a small possibility of meeting the supernatural cast.
The book story really ticks me off. As someone who has difficulty reading books, especially novels (quite possibly an undiagnosed learning disability), it's incredibly presumptuous, callous, and judgmental (not to mention ablest) to assume that just because someone doesn't regularly read books, that means they are uneducated or dumb. I see this attitude a lot in the BookTube/BookTok/Bookstagram communities. Reading is not easy for everyone, and not everyone enjoys it. Everyone absorbs information in different ways.
Non easy for some people, and also just not enjoyable for some. Not everyone likes to read for fun; they don't like sitting still with a book. This is coming from someone who loves to read for most of the day.
The hilarity I find in the BookTube, especially channels like The Book Leo and yes I'm totally namedropping because I watched the video recently, are so incredibly NOT well read they have no idea of the background lore many novels are based on and they pretend to be critics on these novels when they don't have the background or knowledge to give a criticism in the first place. Book Leo went on a long rant she claimed she researched about "why are faeries suddenly hot" a while ago and her comments included "Sarah J. Maas made up the Bogge." And I'm like no, *the Bogge is literally out of lore*, Maas pilfers relentlessly from lore for literally everything. And Book Leo also went on about other things that made me think she's had ZERO education on either Shakespeare or Ovid's Metamorphosis if she thinks fairies were invented by Shakespeare or Shakespeare didn't pilfer shamelessly from Meta. Not to mention there are literally creatures from lore that seduce and sleep with humans called "fairy lovers" and constant examples of otherworldly people luring humans to other realms as lovers from Art's brother Connla being lured to the other world by a girl with an apple, to Niamh and Oisin, so it's not even a "this millenia" thing she was picking at. ... and based on your user name I get the feeling you know the stories I'm talking about. ANY WAY tldr: BookTube are a bunch of hypocrites calling people dumb while literally not being as knowledgable as they like to claim themselves.
OMG that 3rd story....I went to college and graduated, but my favorite book is "Where The Sidewalk Ends" by Shel Silverstein. I was introduced to the book when I was 9-10 years old (I'm 46 now) and even owned a copy. Being snobs about reading is so stupid.
Chick-fil-A story: Dad shouldn't have to suggest to try a taste first before going "all in" with the creation. His son is at an age to figure that out on his own. So dad may or may not have had the thought of a taste test, but it's irrelevant, as the son needs to learn.
particularly seeing as collages are largly 'pay to play'. so many rich arseholes that know fuck all about anything 'graduate' from collage. sure if you get in on your grades and study thibgs that actually require a formal education (science, law, medical etc) collage is a must (but again, you can also get that through the military and maybe even better and hey, they PAY you to do it) but if your just going to collage because 'that's how you get a job' you are so dumb its not funny. Hell, my step father is military trained, he is now a lecturer teaching at a university. OP could end up in a similar position while his wife would be looking down at him for not going to collage. not to mention she will probably find it hard to find a good job with her English lit degree or whatever. employers are starting to realise that collage degrees are not everything and some actively avoid hiring collage graduates as a lot of them are unable to think outside the box.
Story 3 infuriates me. I read children's classics like the BFG, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Matilda, the Witches, etc. So OP, YTA. I hope that you see the error of your ways and soon.
Story 2: OP could use this as a perfect demonstration of how a bank/credit cards work (something school typically doesn't teach you!). Set up an agreement to pay back X amount of money each month with a logical interest rate until it is paid back and, if the payment is late or missed, it couples on extra fees and extra punishment of some other form (since credit score isn't really a thing in this case). Money management isn't always about spending money that you only have (even though that is optimal). Handling your credit is important too, since credit cards are basically the only good way to increase your credit score to help with loans for houses or cars. Turn this moment into a teaching moment!
It’s also a really really shit parenting idea to dictate what people can do with their own money. His daughter has clearly been saving money and not spending much, it’s also worth noting at the time of the story she is literally like a month off adulthood she isn’t 14
@@theveganduolingobird7349 He also clearly didn't teach his daughter on good spending habits. Even for two people 10k is a lot to spend on a vacation. Is she buying first class plane tickets and expensive hotels?
It's always 4pm where I'm from, when Dabney uploads a new video, so I have done my cleaning,made food for my family,kids and husband and get alone time listening and eating! What a wonderful way to spend the evening! Hope you do well at school!
The College fund story, im never against people spending money on themselves and living 1 in a lifetime experiences, but the way she went about it showed clear and extreme inmaturity with money management, paying your own travel expenses is one thing, but paying your friends plane, entrance and hotel expenses out of your own college fund is ludicrous. And it seems she did everything on a whim, so yeah righ decision locking her out of the fund, but she will be the asshole if she takes it away completely. }
It’s not immature at all. She technically used most of her contribution to the trip and told her dad, she’d pay back. She clearly has the job to pay it back if she contributed almost the same amount as her parents. Her family is even saying they’ll help her because OP’s taking this to the extreme. He is NOT mad about the money and the nonexistent immaturity. He is actually mad about his daughter going to the trip when he said no
@@Art_museum28you are so completely wrong lol. It is extremely immature and if she can't manage and plan her money, let alone COMMUNICATE to the people who put the money into the account what her intents are, then she can't be trusted with the whole account. It's basic financial planning. She should pay back that 10K before getting any access, so she can learn how to budget and the importance of making good financial decisions. I wish I had a dad like hers.
@@NikolaiWowe she did plan. She even said she was going to pay it back. She’s 18 by the time she left. She technically didn’t have to tell OP anything. Maybe she could’ve told him, but from the sound of it, she figured he’d find a way to punish her. It’s not even clear if the amount she took will effect her chances in college. If the issue was the money, OP would’ve allowed her to pay it back. But he didn’t because it’s not the issue. He’s mad that she went at all, not how she got there
@@Art_museum28unless she’s going to a different country, a vacation does not cost 10k. This is quite obviously the beginning of a habit. On top of that, it doesn’t matter if she says if she’s going to pay it back. She just turned 18, and she’s in no position to pay it back for years. 10k is enough to be a college loan. Just saying that she is going to pay it back is NOT a plan. It’s an end. A plan is a step-by-step, day-by-day schedule. She did NOT have a plan to do so. These were obviously nothing but empty words to get out of trouble. She IS immature. At 18, she should be thinking about her next steps to secure her future so that she CAN afford things like this next time.
Story 3: my husband is retired navy and he was an ET. His schooling he did for the Navy was way harder and more demanding than when he went to “actual college”. They crammed into a year what you’d normally learn in 2-4 years. Plus he then had to do hands on training immediately after on an intense deployment where they almost came to blows with China. So yeah you’re the a-hole 10 times over. I wouldn’t be surprised if Jody is visiting this woman’s house when her husband is away. 😒edit to add: military education 99% of the time gives you credits in college too. Cause you know it counts 🤦🏼♀️
Picky eater story: As one myself, OP is NTA. I’m old enough to know what foods I do and don’t like, and on the rare occasion I do try something new, I always make sure to take a little bit. I understand that’s a kid, though, but I agree he has to learn. Hopefully OP’s child can eventually learn what they do and don’t like.
The 14yr old boy story about food. Not the AH, This is how entitlement is made. I was given more food and stuff like that, doesn't lead to a good or happy person.
College fund story : Once she pays back the money BY HERSELF (no help from mommy or MIL) then OP can open the account. Teach her she cant always rely on others to get her out of her screw-ups
First she should pay back the money with whatever she has in savings. Second, she should get her gf to reimburse for her share since it wasn’t officially her money to use on her.
but OP said the daughter did put about 5000 of it in there herself. So some of that was already her own savings and if that's true then is is her choice to use those savings however she likes, if its a poor choice or not its still hers to make. and if she really did only spend the same amount she put in herself and not OP's money then I think he's overreacting.
I heard this story on Am I the Jerk channel. I agree with everything. It's clear that she is extremely spoiled and is used to getting her way. I got shamed for stating that she already learned her lesson. Not if she's throwing a tantrum and expects everyone to run to her rescue to save her from her screw-ups. She certainly hasn't learned if she still believes that.
She didn’t screw up. She’s already been working and has contributed a bit to the fund. She used her own money to pay for the trip and she literally said she’d be paying it back after the trip. OP is punishing his daughter because she found a way to go and he didn’t want her to go. OP’s sounding super controlling and is back he can’t control her
@@Art_museum28she's spending her college fund (mostly by the parents) to pay for her friend as well. Lmfao. Spoiled. And all that for supernatural? 😂😂😂😂
TECHNICALLY OP never said his daughter wouldn’t get her college fund anymore, he just revoked her access to it so she can’t take any more money out. Which TBH she shouldn’t have been able to remove money from such an important account to begin with! The third story also unfortunately has a pretty sad update. Basically OP and her husband were now in a rough patch thanks to her behavior, but they hadn’t made up yet because her husband was deployed on a submarine mission of some kind and would be gone for several weeks. And unfortunately, a terrible accident occurred on the submarine the husband was on, and he was exposed to a MASSIVE amount of radioactive material and is no currently fighting for his life in the hospital with radiation sickness. The OP is understandably devastated and terrified that she may very well lose her husband, and one of the things he told her while he was conscious in the hospital was something like “maybe if I’d read more books, I would’ve been smart enough to avoid this” and it absolutely gutted OP. So yeah, OP is currently dealing with immense guilt for her behavior and terrified that her husband is going to die, and the poor husband is fighting for his life and will likely suffer lifelong health complications from this if he somehow pulls through.
That third story update is tragic. On the one hand op should feel bad about insulting her husband like that. But on the other, unless he recovers, they may never be able to reconcile.
That’s awful! Prayers to the young man and all who were exposed. 😢🙏 Those subs are extremely dangerous yet necessary, unfortunately, in our world. I salute anyone who takes that post. 🫡 I’m having a difficult time feeling bad for the wife, she should have never been such an ungrateful, snobby, prat to begin with.
@@Sorchia56op is misinformed based on another youtuber manufacturing an update on it, I've checked the actual reddit account and no such update exists on standard reddit or way back machine archives
Private school story - This is one of those comversations OP and the husband should have discussed before marriage. Maybe even bring the BIL in and explain the situation. But it's too late for that now. OP needs to stand her ground, let her husband AND the kids know that she is NOT the one paying the bill, the daughter is basically a daughter to the BIL and she is NOT going to take this opportunity away from the daughter. Now as far as everything else (Christmas, birthdays, etc) if the other kids are not treated equally, then there is a problem. In my opinion though, ifthe husband keeps insisting the new step-daughter goes to public school, OP could be reaching divorce territory. This is why this should ahve been discussed beforehand.
A ton of Navy schools are WAY harder than regular college. The nuclear program in particular is notorious for its academic rigor and results in a pretty aggressive washout rate. One of the highest attrition rates outside of special operations forces.
Books story:You don't have the right to insult his education in anyway when he works on stuff more important that your existence,YTA Chick Fil A story:.............Ahh yes,all the more reason pepole lose hope in tiktok kids ever doing proper stuff,NTA
story 1: OP either missed some red flags or the husband kept up a pretty good mask until they got married, and in a shocking twist, instead of marrying OP for her money, he married her for her brother in law's money! I mean, I get wanting to have a husband and all, but OP sure didn't pick the right one. I know reddit jumps to "DIVORCE!" a lot, but in this case I would say annulment at the very least.
It's not that OP missed some red flags. People like this don't show their true colors until they're married b/c then they think, "What's mine is mine, and yours is mine" when it comes to money and assets. The problem is, OP never sent her daughter it was her Brother and SIL, and of course, OP's husband just thinks that he's "Entitled" the "Family Money."
@@LilDevyl17nah, some people are so insecure in themselves that they would rather eat shit for the rest of their lives rather than be single for any period of time. remember how this person got knocked up as a young? And then, she manages to find a husband like this? Yeah, this seems like a neversingle. If this person dated for any length of time more than a few months and not have their lonely goggles on, this exact conversation about how the daughter is going to a private school on the sister’s dime, should come up and that situation about the stepkids going to public school is still there.
@@rudyardganuelas6254 well yeah there's that too. Some people are terrified of being alone and have such garbage self-esteem they don't believe they're entitled to anything better OR the sudden switch to abuser mode of their partner takes them off-guard so bad they think they did something to deserve being treated that way.
I'm not sure if I'm reading too much into the friend's response, of the wedding dress story. OP stated that it was something like 2 years of asking the friend to look for the dress, with a response of "can't find it, still looking" (if I remember right). But as soon as OP sent the text about finding the dress, the friend responsed with ... "You were looking in my closet" ... which suggests to me that the friend knew (or possible knew) where the dress was the whole time.
@@justasentientmclarenp1879it’s not stealing if that money was meant for her, also it would have been only 5k “stolen” if the other 5k was what she personally put into the account
@@StrangeHooves No, not really. If you set up a fund for something, you only use it for that purpose. Using your fund for other stuff is immature and is a pretty easy way to go broke. Also, by the way "only" 5k is still a very, very huge amount of money.
@@DarkSlumber sure an immature/misuse of funds but they were meant for her, not someone else so “stolen” isn’t exactly the correct term here. And yes I know 5k is a lot of money, but the use of “only” was because in context of 10k, 5k is significantly less.
I have read the third story, and she's neglecting that her husband is in the NAVY for SUBMARINE NUCLEAR REACTORS. That takes more smarts than while high school or college could ever give and need. Just because he hasn't read many "books" like them, doesn't mean he isn't well read. He might not be able to tell you everything about a book series like Harry Potter, but I sure as hell can bet you couldn't say a dang thing about Nuclear Reactors on Subs. She's the AH, no questions asked, she called her husband dumb, to friends, in front of him, and doesn't seem to understand how rude that is.
Story 4: hi, someone who struggles with food aversions here! Food aversions (typically what “picky” kids deal with that just gets brushed off) aren’t something that you can really turn off or “push through” because all it will end with is mental anguish and vomit on everyone’s shoes. OP shouldn’t buy him a whole other meal, I agree. That’s not why he’s the asshole. He’s the asshole because he criticized and put down his kid for wanting to try new food. Encourage him! Maybe tell him to cut the sandwich into four and try it on one piece so that if he doesn’t like it he still has the rest of the food to eat. But OP YTA for putting your kid down instead of teaching him and encouraging better practices.
Story 1: for safety reasons I don't think you should put him down at the parent when they come to your daughter, because someone's so foolish to thing he has a right to make someone pay for 3 other kids probably isn't above sabotage to get his way.
Reading story: as someone who has to read/write/review +1,000 page spec manuals for their job on a daily basis… yeah I don’t read very many books anymore. I just don’t find it relaxing anymore. And yes, I have multiple post graduate degrees.
Story 3 I work in oncology, not a PhD but I work with a lot of them. Staying current requires a huge amount of reading, so doing yet more reading for fun is at the bottom of the list. If you ask them what's the last book they read, they'd probably tell you something like the AJCC Cancer Staging Manual. Reading books for fun isn't the mark of a good education, it's the mark of liking reading books.
Honestly military education is like taking summer classes but in half the time which is already half and also 2 years of school all in that time. Especially nuclear stuff. Once you get to CNT and nuclear stuff, suicide rates jump due to the stress.
So with the wedding dress one, there is a rumour that there is an update on what happened after OP gave the dress to her sister, but some have been unable to find it. Regardless of whether or not it exists, I will just say that OP shouldn’t have said a bloody thing about taking the dress back. Then, if the friend comes asking about it, OP will know that both the theft and burying it under items in the closet was intentional, and possibly expected that someone might look for it.
Story 3: OP is correct, military schooling is not comparable to college. It's *several times harder.* Seriously, in what world does OP think studying while in the military, of all places, is easier than studying as a civvie? I'm in the military myself, and nearly all cadets with a civvie degree struggle to pass even the written portion of their basic training, let alone keep their brains functioning after the physical portion. Military academy grads do a lot better overall, and officer-candidates usually blow it out of the water. OP is terribly uninformed, at best.
"oh he only has a military eDuCaTiOn, so its not as elite as us college folk." Girl, he works on frikken nuclear subs. I guarentee the reading comprehension skills for his work manuals are waaaaaay more demanding than whatever barnes & noble special you picked up. Also, there was an update. Shortly after that post, the husband was called away. There was an incident on his sub and he was critically injured. He was in the hospital with potentially fatal radiation. He made a lighthearted joke about how maybe if he read more he wouldnt have been injured, and she's regreting everything.
She is a MAJOR asshole. Especially after that update. I can't imagine telling people my loved one isn't educated in anyway. Hell I'll bring up the fact my cousins have essentially a middle school education but went back for their GED and had/have great paying jobs. Education and intelligence isn't just about book knowledge there are many types of intelligence and people need to get of their high horse about it.
Story 4: If you don’t like food if the only change is that it became leftovers I will put money on you having sensory issues. That being said, I don’t disagree with the dad’s choices. He was warned and he can now eat food at home.
He was warned but also has been sent a clear message that trying new foods results in punishment. Not sure this method will work out the way the dad wants it to.
Meh, agree and disagree. I will admit that I was a very picky eater until I was about 14. I frequently would refuse to eat leftovers, even if it was food I liked. Eventually I did grow out of that but it took me having no food other than leftovers. The dad is absolutely in the right here. And this is coming from someone who has sensory issues.
Story 2 - NTA Maybe OP shouldn't take the funds away completely, but restrict their use until the daughter can prove that she can be trusted. Unless by "taking away" he means remove all her direct access to the account. She's shown that she is not ready for the responsibility of managing that much money. If I were OP, I would be paying all expenses myself, and giving her a strict allowance. I'd also insist that she work to repay that amount. That account was for a specific purpose, and she took money for a completely different purpose. She needs to experience some sort of consequence for her actions. Story 3 - Holy shit, OP seriously threw her husband under the bus! She's right, college and military educations are not the same - military schooling is HARDER! You have to be smart to work as a nuke in the Navy (my brother was one), they're not like Homer Simpson AT. ALL. OP had better grovel and apologize like she never had before, or the next thing SHE will be reading are divorce papers. Story 4 - NTA 14 is plenty old enough to suffer an afternoon of being hungry after choosing to not eat the food he ordered. It's not as if OP made him pay him back for it too! Story 5 - NTA That's not a friend, she's a thief. Story 6 - NTA, and "No" is a complete sentence. Aunt isn't entitled to an explanation, and her child isn't entitled to a ride.
I highly doubtful she lost the dress, I think she decided to keep it and try to sale it online. A lot of women love vintage wedding dresses and OPS friend saw $$$$ in her eyes.
I don’t get why the friend wanted to steal OP’s family wedding dress. I mean, maybe the friend really liked the dress or thought “Hey! Free rainy day dress to sell.” 🤷♀️
People have commented that there is an update which OPs friend planned to sell her dress and was looking at potential buyers. The so called friend made a scene at OPs sister’s wedding accusing that the dress was stolen. She couldn’t provide proof and the woman who originally made the dress was there to verify who the dress belongs too
According to another comment there was an update saying the "friend" crashed the wedding, said the dress was hers, got called out by the woman who made it and it turns out the "friend" sells vintage dresses
I'd have much less of a problem with story #1 if the daughter didn't pay for her friends entire trip too. Using the money for herself is bad enough, but paying for her friends entire vacation trip is really bad.
I was looking for this point. The daughter didn't just pay for herself, but her girlfriend too, so if she had just paid for herself, then it would've been just her money. (5k) So no theft from the parent's money, just wasting her own. And OP didn't mention contacting the girlfriend's parents, cause do they know what their daughter is doing and that her entire trip was paid for by another family's money? Also, I agree with other commenters that OP should not have the account in her name since she's shown such disrespect and lack of financial understanding. OP should pay for the tuition when the time comes with the money in the account since there's no longer any money in it that was put in by the daughter anyway, so the money will get used as intended by the family members who have contributed. My college was paid for by my parents, but I never had access to the tuition money so I never had the temptation to use the money for other purposes, and I was and am so grateful that my parents worked hard and I don't have that bill looming over me. Just my 2 cents anyways. Thanks for another video RSlash!
Yea I went to college with my parents paying for it and the only money I saw was the money I earned from my summer job. That money I can spend how ever I want but it has to last me the year so that's how I learned to manage my money.
Gonna be honest, I think that the other people who donated money into the account DO have a say in whether or not it's ok. If they put in over 5k between them and don't have an issue with it then I don't think she should have to pay it back. I do however agree with taking her access away, and that he should directly pay any tuition and other fees directly from his account. At the same time I agree with the family who say that her life shouldn't have to revolve around college for the funds. It never sat right with me to hear about parents refusing to give money they saved for college to their kids for other things because they don't want to go.
Who ever said that everything has to be fair in step families? I have a son and my ex had two boys. She was always going on about how everything needed to be fair. My family has is well off, hers is not. So one Christmas she's demanding that everything stays fair and that we spend the exact same amount on each boy, to the penny. It was a pain in the butt but i managed to do it, ended up spending about $700 on each child. Everything was going good. The day before Christmas a huge box shows up from my son's grandmother on his mother's side. She sent about 3K worth of stuff for my son. The were several smaller gifts for my step sons but no where near the 3K mine got. My ex blew up at me about how it wasn't fair, blah blah blah. I just started laughing because its not like i could control what people outside our household spend or sent. I'm so glad we're not together any more LOL
So on story 2, hasn't rslash said before that setting aside a savings for a child, means that money belongs to that child? Yes the purpose might be for college, but if she chooses a trade school and only uses a fraction of the savings, does that mean the parents get the rest back?
it wasnt her money yet the parents set it asside for college so its their parents savings. till she is 18 and its on her account its her parents money. at least the aprt they put into it. also in most cases the parents use it to pay it for their kid not give them the money directly so yeha if she didnt went to college the parents could keep their money or repurpose it for an home or something
@@robcubed9557 They say college fund, but, since OP didn't mention taxes, it's possible it's just a regular savings account they they have earmarked for college. If it was the other kind, I feel like he would have mentioned it in the post and to the daughter. I say this because, if OP's position was about the daughter being irresponsible, then adding how she screwed up taxes strengthens his argument. So, unless further evidence to the contrary, I think we have to assume it isn't the tax exempt one.
First story: that really needed to be discussed before the marriage, this sounds like it's going to be a massive, potentially relationship ending, problem. OP is still NTA; her husband better keep his thoughts to himself, but OP might want to warn her brother about this discussion just in case her husband has some sort of entitled rage. She needs to make it very clear that she will never back her husband in this.
As a Supernatural fan, I understand wanting to go to conventions, but is it really a once in a lifetime opportunity? The cast do conventions all the time and, even though the show has ended, they've said they're happy to continue the cons as long as fans are still interested, which we very much are. All in all, I can see both sides of the argument.
Story 2: Yo. The daughter “STOLE” $5k from the college fund, and your response is to tell OP to tread carefully? Really?! In any other circumstance, you know what stealing $5k gets you as a punishment? PRISON! OP said no, she refused to accept it as the answer, stole money to spend on a trip INCLUDING PAYING HER FRIENDS WAY, and now is suffering the consequences of that action. OP is right! She is showing incredible immaturity and OP is teaching the daughter a VERY valuable lesson. Mess around, find out. The family thinking OP is in the wrong can shut up.
*Story 3* I read books all the time and I literally said outloud "1984" right before rslash. The fact that I read that book in high school does not detract from how AMAZING of a book it is!! I often read ahead of the class when we were assigned that book because I enjoyed it so much. That doesnt mean i am uneducated or dont read!
The dress story: OP is overly naive to think it wasn't malicious when so many things are proof to the contrary. One, friend asks to wear it to a wedding. When OP asks for it back, friend suddenly claims they can't find it. Then how were they going to wear a dress they couldn't find to said wedding. Two, friend is upset OP was looking through her stuff for OP's property instead of being elated OP found it. Odd behavior for someone who's not being malicious to their friend, but OK. I'm suree there's another if you reflect more on it, but i can't think of one beyond these two, which should give a working brain the logical conclusion that this friend is no friend of OP.
If your favorite book is 1984 (it’s mine too-but saying a book about the terrors of totalitarianism is a favorite is itself frightening. Better to say it is the book you respect most for its strong warning), you might be interested that a ‘side-sequel’ was published just this month. It’s called Julia, written by Sandra Newman. It is the events of the original book from the perspective of the original protagonist Winston Smith’s girlfriend Julia. It is written in the same vein, but is in many ways more horrifying, but also hopeful. I highly recommend.
The last story had an update. The aunt called his job and accused him of being ableist. Since many of the workplace's clientele were disabled, his work firs suspended, then fired him. The nephew, who reminder is 14, broke into the house, took the car keys and stole the car, totaling it. And there was something he was having to get a defense laywer for. So bc his aunt wouldnt accept "no" OP lost his car, and his job.
@@jessilynallendilla5014I hope he does. CPS should also be informed since how else the the nephew get to OPs car, his keys, and steal the car to begin with?
For the third story: As someone who has done both military education and college education, she's right. Military education is much harder. My schooling had an 85% to pass standard, drill sergeants, and uniforms. My college schooling had a 60% to pass standard, teachers that asked us to call them by their first name, and I could go in pjs if I wanted to. Not to minimize college education, obviously my degree is something I'm proud of, but to act like a military education is lesser to college just because it isn't 4 years is ridiculous. There's a reason just my military schooling covered an entire second degree
Story 2: OP is the BH. People have no idea how that break between highschool and higer education can be. If I had taken that break, when I could afford it, when I was so tired of school, instead of listening to both my parents and going straight to college, I'm convinced I would not have dropped out and my life would be amounting to something right now.
"You misunderstand" "listen h0e I'm with you only because you asked me do date you I was extremely desperate and my dumbass braincells decided you're the best person
Third story: Before I go into my take on it, I want to say that I'm an English major, so I had to read and analyze a LOT of college-level classics. I also read a lot of books, in general. Conversely, my husband is an IT tech, and he can do nearly anything with a computer, from software issues to actual physical computer repair. I mention these backgrounds to say that, just because my husband isn't familiar with a lot of books that it doesn't mean he is any less intelligent than I. Between our different skill sets and other knowledge we have outside of those, we're both pretty intelligent. Not to mention, there are many different types of intelligence. My point is I woukd never insult my husband by claiming he isn't intelligent just because he hasn't analyzed, for example, a TS Elliot poem. All of that having been said, I say the following: GRRL, not only are you the asshole, you also don't get how intelligence works. He may not have read a lot of literature after high school, but that doesn't make him any less intelligent. I mean, working with nuclear reactors?! That *can't* be easy!
3- YTA, I’m a college student, and the number of books you have read isn't a sign of intelligence! OP and her friends are the type of people who think anything outside of classic Western books isn't real literature!
The story about op's wedding dress is that her deadbeat friend was trying to keep the dress and not give it back to the rightful owner and the last story about op who ordered himself a mustang from a car dealership is that op needs to change his phone number and change his Facebook settings to private and cut ties with his side of the family and extended family
Nuclear Power School graduate here. That school is 2 and a half years of going with 4 hours of sleep a day, most days, sometimes less, sometimes none. When I went thru the attrition rate from beginning to end was over 80 percent. If her husband made it thru then he is far smarter than her stuck up friends.
For story 2 the problem isn't how much money the daughter put into the account, it's that the money was set aside specifically for college. The daughter spent 10 THOUSAND DOLLARS on a vacation even if she put 5 into the account. Who spends 10k on a vacation? When they don't actually have the money to do so?
Exactly. Especially if they will be staying for WEEKS, that means the 10K isn't the end of the spending. They will still need food, transportation and entertainment funds, PLUS money for the convention and souvenirs. The 10k was only the beginning.
On the food issue one: I don’t think OP is TA, however, if the son would rather go hungry than eat food that’s touching each other etc, I’d say he DOES have sensory issues 🤷🏻
But that $5000 she put in the account was put in over the course of years and now she's going to have to figure out how to get $10,000 to put back into the account in the span of months
And? She could do half of the thing she want with $5000, the OP went not enough, because I bet if the daugther pay all the money back she will get acess to the account again, but she will think better when she try to do this again.
The last story. My sister is autistic and has Cerebral Palsy. Although she has control of her bladder, shes very reactive and likes to push buttons etc. Because of this Im VERY reluctantant to be alone in my car with her even if shes in the back. NTA. I would react the dame
Second story: If the rest of the family was willing to pay, then WHY SHE DECIDED TO STEAL RIGHT AWAY INSTEAD OF ASKING OTHER FAMILY MEMBERS?! Besides, according to OP's math she only put 5k in the account and she took for the event double that, so she took her own 5k ans stole another 5k. I say id you do the crime you do the time. NTA.
She didn’t steal. She was working putting her money into it too. She basically used her money and said,”look dad, I’ll pay it back later.” OP is being immature and basically throwing a tantrum because,”Oh no. My now legal adult daughter isn’t under my thumb anymore”
Especially considering people have reported that in an update the aunt gets OP fired from his job reporting he is ableist. Then some how OPs nephew gets access to OPs car keys, steals the car and totals it.
14:37 Dude, this is really an easy case to crack. OP told this "friend" that she found the dress and then the "friend" told her exactly _where_ the dress was despite claiming to not be able to find it before. That's basically a Matlock moment right there.
THANK YOU! I went on convention this year. The conventions themselves are not "once in a lifetime" opportunities. A trip to Australia is. But the daughter is so incredibly stupid.
The wedding dress story had an update: OP's sister wore the dress on her wedding day, so the "friend" showed up at the wedding venue saying the wedding dress was stolen from her. The groom and guests asked if she had proof this was originally her dress which she didn't have. Then the grandmother or aunt from the groom's side stood up to share she was the original seamstress and she made it for OP's mother. Turns out the friend was selling vintage clothes to make extra money and was trying to sell OP's dress.
Thanks!
So, the wedding dress "friend" is a thief.
You're the mvp
So she WAS a thief. Why am i not surprised.
She probably already had a buyer for the dress or else she would have waited until after the wedding to swipe it
I love how rSlash went on a rant about reading book and although his favorite book was a classic, that didn't mean he didn't read anything else, but forgot the part where his literal job is reading
That part went right over my head until you pointed it out 😂😂
True 😂
To be fair, reading a book/novel isn't the same as reading and commentating about stories from reddit XD
Yes, but they were specifically talking about reading books. So I can see why he wouldn't connect the two. I appreciate his comments. My favorite books are all decades old.
@@darkmega24ify that's true, but it's still reading. It doesn't matter what kind of reading you do imo, as long as you read it counts
Wedding dress story: OP texted “I found the dress.” The friend responded “Why did you go rummaging through my closet?” Yeah she knew exactly where the dress was. She was just trying to steal it. NTA and she is not your friend.
It's worse than that. The "friend" crashed the wedding and demanded the dress back saying she stole it, and the grandmother who made the dress forbid her from taking it. Said "friend" had the dress listed for sale online and had been trying to get a big payday from it.
@@VeldrusaraWhere’d you find the update? I checked on Reddit, including AmItheDoormat that someone else suggested, and could find nothing about an update.
@@Veldrusarawas this a recent update cause I remember reading about it when it was first posted
@@Veldrusara Link to update? Tried looking but can't find it
@@fretfultrout2788 I dunno. Dozens of people in this comment section spread the news.
Hi, former nuclear mechanic from the Navy. That school is HARD to get through. The school takes about 2 years to get though. Most of the people I met in there either already had degrees or HAD at least attended college for a brief time. A lot of people who join the military do so because they lack other options or the financial ability to go to college. That doesn't mean they are not intelligent. I dropped out of college so I could use the military benefits to pay for my school instead. And guess what? I DID that. I'm not uneducated. I got through one of the hardest schools in the entire military AND still managed to get my bachelor's after I got out. OP is the asshole for belittling her husband's intelligence and acting like a formal education is the only qualifier for intelligence.
Shit even MOS's that dumbasses like me can do aren't a joke to go through. I was a combat engineer in the Marines, and our schoolhouse covers a wide curriculum, from airfield repair and bridging to explosives and mine/ied sweeping. There's almost too much information to retain as a combat engineer, not to mention the added pressure of nervous excitement the first time you handle real explosives.
Many in my family are military. Lots of the training they did are equivalent to college education and include certifications that are used by colleges to count towards classes.
On top of that, I learned while my husband was serving, that college courses are offered through their branch.
It’s an insult to look at someone who served time in the military as less intelligent and educated.
Plus it’s not like he doesn’t read. He’s reading manuals for very complex equipment. How does that not count?
Yeah, he works on nuclear reactors. The idea that hes not educated is just.. wow, this woman sucks lol.
Even if he had some manual labour job it still doesn't matter. His wife was was a b1tch to say what she said, and even worse to have a good ole laugh about it with her tosser friends.
Her and her friends sound like dreadful snooty people.
Sad that she missed out on critical thinking in her schooling, because as you point out she is evaluating something she has zero knowledge of to someone who has direct knowledge. Like you I have done both and can say that for me, college has a breadth of knowledge whereas military training has depth. I value both for their own sakes, but would never try to compare them this way.
Story 3: yta for throwing your husband under the bus over a terrible joke and being super snobbish about education alongside your friend who asked the question, apologise now or risk a divorce.
The man is presumably an engineer for the nuclear reactor on a freaking submarine. Imagine the arrogance in thinking that is somehow less difficult or educated than being in college.
adding to this, like I said in my post. 88% of the so called "collage educated" morons wouldn't comprehend even 1% of the math and tech that a nuke class has to understand.
I love YA novels, they would probably think i'm really dumb lol
In the update, the husband was called to duty shortly after. There was an accident onboard and he potentially has fatal radiation exposure.
He knows where he stands in the marriage and it’s very sad. I’m curious to know OPs favorite book? Glamour Magazine?
14:00 That friend was absolutely malicious. OP didn’t initially mention the closet. The only reason the friend would get mad was if she knew it was in the closet
According to another commenter, the story got updated. The "friend" crashed the wedding trying to get it back, got called out BY THE ONE WHO MADE IT and it turned out the "friend" was trying to sell the dress off as she sold vintage dresses.
Can you help me report someone who is stalking and harassing me because they are doxxing me because of how I comment
@@dragonsteamworks6675 That 'friend' is both stupid and bold. My family would have opened a can of whoop ass on her for trying that! 😆😆
@@xKCAZxLEADERRUclips makes that easy enough lol I can’t even criticize anyones political opinions without getting temporarily banned for 24 hrs for cyber bullying so if you’re conservative good luck but if you fit into their political agenda as a “perpetual victim” then it should be easy enough just email them and use a bunch of social justice buzzwords
Yeah! The friend KNEW what she was doing, which is stealing! That friend is being malicious! The friend is mad that OP found the dress, and was catch.
The "friend" in the 5th story didn't lose anything. She was definitely going to keep that wedding dress. That's why she offered to pay for it and was mad that OP found it.
Apparently in an update, the (ex)friend tried to crash OP's wedding but got out by THE ONE WHO MADE THE DRESS. The friend was kicked out and as it turned out...she was definitely going to keep the dress to sell it as a Vintage item. Talk about absolute scum.
@@Xolivas1That update more than likely never happened, due to nobody being able to confirm it and due to how the OOP only had one comment other than their post which was just about how she thought the friend wouldn’t look for the dress again.
Yeah and she asked Op why she was in her closet in her room 😂 she knew where it was at
@@Xolivas1 There is no update. marychoppins/hiking engineer lied and made up the fanfic "update" to promote the new subreddit they mod for (r/amithediirmat)
Story 3: Military education IS college equivalent. I know a couple former US Navy nuke techs, and my wife lost that school as a discipline problem. That school is NO JOKE. Don't get me started on pilots and medical officers...
(Seven-year US Army vet here)
@spectrelead As a civilian bartender in the mess in the CAF, I know exactly how much work all specialists in the forces go through especially pilots, engineers and those who become our astronauts. Submarine officers are insanely trained. 5 bucks says that woman is your stereotypical depends wife .
Just showing more and more how ignorant or unintelligent the wife is
My family is Navy all the way and I got so mad at OP being like "lawl he's not well educated' because like, bruh, do you have any idea how much goes into sub crews because you're literally in a bubble under water, there is NO room for mistakes down there.
The thing is, by her own recollection, she didn't specify "college education." She straight up said "Oh, my husband isn't educated! Tee-hee!" Then, when he complained, she tries to back-pedal and say, "Oh, no, no... I only meant that your education was _different."_
@@Wendy_O._Koopa No, she said "he's not *well* educated"
On the college savings one. If it’s a dedicated college fund they are taxed way less than normal bank accounts and if the money isn’t used for college you have to back pay taxes.
Story 3: You can tell the wife and her friends hold the common misconception that formal college education equals intelligence. She went out of her way to make her (very accomplished) husband the brunt of a cruel joke in a social situation over To Kill a Mockingbird? Like, how do your friends assume that liking that one book means your husband "only read books in high school"?
I have a sneaking suspicion that this isn't the first time OP has spoken poorly with her friends about her husband, just the first time he was there to witness it.
So, it wasn't just me then? B/C the wife could've easily said that her husband really likes to read the classics when he has time. That's what I do!
@@LilDevyl17 or let him defend himself. the dude is a grown man, he can explain himself.
@@LilDevyl17hell she could’ve said, “Yeah reading isn’t a hobby of his.” She could’ve even gone the extra mile and said, “What’s wrong with that?” There isn’t anything wrong with not reading in your spare time; it’s like getting huffy someone isn’t into knitting or gardening.
Instead of backing her husband up and showing a minuscule amount of grace, she showed her ass and told him what she really thinks of him. Now she’s trying to backpedal and gaslight him further by saying, “Oh you’re just reacting this way because you misunderstood me. I didn’t call you an idiot (she did). I just told the you aren’t college educated (she didn’t).”
What gets me is that her husband went through one of the hardest schools you can go through in the navy, works one of the hardest jobs a sailor can have, and she’s the one calling _him_ stupid? The guy is probably smarter than a majority of the people in that room. Attributing intelligence to only having a degree is something only an idiot would think.
@@beeziebubs2756nah he is stupid for getting a wife that doesn't defend him though it has nothing to do with education
I’m almost done with my college degree and to be honest, I haven’t read a complete book since high school. Although I am stupid as hell for completely non-book related reasons.
Wedding dress story the only mistake OP did was text the friend who we all know was intentionally keeping the dress for herself, that she found the dress
Apparently, theres an update where the "friend" went to the sister's wedding and tried to claim the dress was stolen from her. Then the groom's grandmother revealed she was the original seamstress of the dress. The "friend" was also apparently selling vintage dresses online, so that's why she tried to keep it.
Story 3 could also be called "AITA for calling my husband stupid?" Yes OP you are the AH! 3/5!! I'd love to see you fix a NUCLEAR REACTOR College Girl!!
Facts 🎉
Curious to know what the guy who mocked OPs husband does for a living?
That woman and her friends laid out so many levels of their own ignorance and lack of intelligence in a single short post.
@@lorilancaster5917 Same!! Working on Nuclear Reactors require a mastery of Math, Physics and possibly Chemistry that I doubt OP and her friends have...skills that Hubby does clearly have since it's his job
@@remylarrivee2047and who’s willing to bet OPs spouse is the breadwinner?
Story 3: YTA.
Reading a lot of books as a hobby does not mean someone is more intelligent than someone who doesn't.
He works in a very awesome field and he is not educated ? WTH. I hope the guy leaves the OP
She's definitely not very emotionally intelligent that's for sure.
She's an idiot. She majorly insulted him in public. 🤨
I day this as both a ten year military veteran, and a voracious reader since elementary school.
The simple act of reading is not a measure of intelligent, just as being online by computer or small device is no measure of literacy.
Yeah, unbelievable that the wife said that, the friends LAUGHED and then the wife wondered why her husband was pissed. How stupid is she!?
Not reading novels also does not translate to not being well read.
That Navy guy should say to his wife "Hey, I decided to take your friends' advice and start reading." Then hand her a book- "How to move on from divorce." Not saying he should dump her, but definitely let her know that she was WAY over the line.
The "friend's" angry reaction at the fact that OP found the dress says it all: she intentionally hid the dress and was hoping OP would forget about it or accept the payment.
And speaking of payment, considering that this was a vintage dress from OP's mother, there's a 9999% chance that the amount the "friend" offered was way lower than what the dress was actually worth.
That "friend" is a thief, and was malicious in every way.
You were right. Someone else commented about an update about how the "friend" confronted OP's sister at the wedding to say that the dress was stolen from her but backed off when asked for proof. _Then_ OP's grandmother, the original designer of the dress, piped up to say that's her handiwork. It turned out that the "friend" is a low-key vintage clothing seller and was trying to sell the dress.
Idk, the idea of a trip to a convention for two people costing 10k is insane to me. That's more than my two week vacation in Japan for two people. I think she should have just used the 5k that she put in. That would have been more than enough, I'm sure.
She said she would also spend two weeks in Australia, and I would assume she'll be sightseeing and doing touristy stuff, so $10K for two weeks seems appropriate to me, TBH
@@pierrecusmybladdersempty1938perhaps.
But she could easily just, not do that, and focus on the con
Idk the Idea that Id have to save Money all my Life and never be able to fun stuff because College will eat Up more than a years salary is way more insane to me.... But I am German and never Had to pay for my education...
Also Australia is pretty expencive compared to the US.
Story 3: one of the smartest people I know is one step above illiterate. He builds his own computers, casually sets up multi step light systems, etc, but he hates reading with a burning passion. You could not pay the man to read a book. Reading does not equal smart
You’re right; they’re not the same. I wonder if your friend has dyslexia… or maybe he was shamed a lot when being taught to read.
Story 3 is exactly why whenever I see a community college on someone's resume I choose them over others. CC people (like myself) are always facing an uphill battle of not being taken seriously and looked down on for not going to a big name 4 year.
That first story. She will only be the butt hole if she does take her daughter out of the private school to please her husband.
Or actually tries to convince BIL to pay for the step kids. I hope OP stands her ground but it looks like divorce is in her future. I can’t see her spouse seeing his fault to where counseling could help. Plus they may not be able to afford it.
@@lorilancaster5917 You’re right asking her brother-in-law would be as well.
Totally agree with both of you..
My thoughts EXACTLY!
Yeah, I find it interesting that the husband suddenly has a problem with the school set up. Obviously the kids were attending different schools before the marriage. Dude has probably been planning to make this ridiculous demand the entire time. Talk about red flags... What would he do if OP had an ex who was paying for the daughter expensive school? Demand that the guy pay for his kids too? LOL
Story 4: As someone who is also picky regarding food, I can give Jack a simple advice: Whenever trying a new food, always have a backup plan.
I was thinking this too.
I really hated this story (also having been a picky eater myself as a child). The father dislikes that the kid is a picky eater but also punishes the kid for deciding to try something outside of their comfort zone. How is that going to help the kid try new things and potentially become less picky?
He needs to accept that his kid will not like every food and encourage them to try new things without the threat of punishment if they don’t like it.
@@therealameliabedelia7821 I disagree. There are times and places for experimenting, and wasting food and money isn't the thing to do, I have sensory issues and OCD with food. (I hate specific textures and they make me vomit, as well as I have "rules" for food touching. It's long and really only makes sense to me, but they are rules that need to be followed none the less, or I panic.)
But here's the deal - Encourage that experimentation when you're at home, or when you know there is someone who will eat the food the picky eater declines. Making them wait for time and place won't discourage experimenting and adding to their repertoire, unless the picky eater is also immature and wants to punish themselves in order to "punish" others. Why throw away perfectly good food, especially when OP explained in advance that he would have to eat his creation. "but it's a trend on tiktok"... And? If he actually wanted to expand his palate and not just "buh I saw it on teh tiktoks!". then he should have ripped a part of his sandwich off and placed the mac and cheese on that to taste FIRST before "ruining" the whole chicken sandwich.
He wanted to ruin it, he did so, and he gets to enjoy the results of his actions.
@@therealameliabedelia7821as a picky eater myself, I always only sample something instead of going all out with stuff. It depends on time and place. At a restaurant you count your losses and just order a backup, but its chick fil a, he could’ve tried a bit of it before hand instead of going all out on it when warned not to. The son isnt an AH ofc but you can’t blame the dad for not wanting to buy more after he literally told him not to do something he decided to do anyway. You’re responsible for yourself and your actions, if you know youre a picky eater but wanna try stuff, make sure to try a bit of it instead of going all out.
@@nutellatubby1943 The son is also a child. Grown adult, yes. You make logical choices like that. A child has not necessarily reached the maturity where they realize that as an option.
@@therealameliabedelia7821they weren’t agreeing with you
Maybe don’t waste food
First story, real quick, OP said that before marriage, her husband had said nothing about her daughter going to a fancy school so cracks are showing.
Second story, OP is technically NTA but said it himself; once his daughter is 18 he can't do anything. However, I do think OP should back off if to see if his daughter can prove she's an adult or not. Let it be a big reality check for her and see if she can earn back that money.
He's 36 with 3 kids. She's 25, got pregnant at 17, but had the fortune of a loving, supportive sister who happened to have married a man with money. Like you said, he knew what her kid's education situation was and didn't quibble until he put a ring on it.
@@slytherinlibrarian3501 There wasn't any updates, just OP making some comments which is where what I said came from. I think the best thing to do would be to go directly to OP's sister and BIL and make the husband plead his case directly. That way, OP isn't putting her and her daughter at risk by being the middle woman and can bring out her husband's true colors with the pressure of basically asking for six figures of support. Either he recognizes his entitlement and apologizes, still be entitled but stop, or yell at the divorce papers he just got handed.
Exactly. If the daughter pays back the $5k she took of other people's money, then she should gain access to the account. If she doesn't, then keep the account locked. You told her the college fund wasn't for convention trips and she went behind your back.
@@MrJr1976I think you got it perfect. It's not like he isn't going to pay for her college he's just isn't letting her have access for indiscriminate spending.
@@MrJr1976 Other people's money? She took out the exact amount SHE put into it, that was HER money and he knows it. OP's just pissed he can't control her with it and she's doing something HE doesn't like.
Story 3 is wild, can't imagine telling people that my partner isn't well educated. I grew up an avid reader and continued to be all throughout college. Now that I'm an adult working full time (reading legal documents all day), I don't always want to spend my free time doing that.
Story 5: how did she know you were in her closet? And who hack something they know they need to get back under all their stuff in the back of the closet? I think she trying to make you the bad guy and blow up because when you put two and two together she's going to have to explain how did she lose something she knew was in the closet after she thoroughly looked around for two years. Don't let her make you feel bad your friend tried to steal your wedding dress.
OP literally texted her friend she found the dress but yeah she was trying to be sneaky stealing
@@WinterBoots15Right, but she wouldn’t have known OP looked in the closet unless she always knew the dress was in the closet
Um. OP said the friend literally offered to store it in her closet.
I’m reading “to kill a mockingbird” right now, I haven’t read it in High School because it isn’t a common lecture in Argentina. But dude, this book is soooo good, why are they even trashing it?
It’s a classic for a reason!
FYI: Navy Nuclear Power School is one of the hardest schools to graduate from in the country. Like… up there with Harvard law. Dude is super smart. And probably has a higher aptitude for learning than everyone at that party, including the wife. Lol
Wake, dress, coffee, rslash, repeat
Wake dress go to school ralash repeat
@@jacobcorturillo6537 same
Yess same 👌😎
Same lol
Wake coffee rslash work sleep repeat
Story 6: If Aunt has a special needs child who is fascinated with muscle cars, there is a very simple solution that requires zero entitled behavior: Rent a car from one of those specialty rental places and drive him around herself.
But that would require her to bear the financial risks that OP told her about, so of course she won't do that.
You're right, but also on the other hand, op didn't have to be ableist in his rejection. Ultimately ESH I think
How is open being ableist? The kid does not have bladder or bowl control? That is an extremely reasonable boundary to not want a 14 year old how cannot control their bowls or bladder to not ride in his vehicle.
@squidnt4103he tried to let her down nicely. It didn’t work.
Wedding dress story: If I was Op I’d have gone to her house and demanded that we both look in the closet and I wouldn’t let it go until I had the dress in hand.
Yea
The second story gets worse if you consider that many college fund accounts are untaxed so long as you can prove it's being used for educational purposes. If this is the case, she may have lost some money that she can't get back because the money she withdrew is subject to taxation. That being said, she did steal $5k. You can't just steal 5 grand from your parents and think everything will turn out okay. That money was the parents' money that had been designated for use with education. What's to say that she won't go to college and use all her education fund on partying or drinking or whatever in the first year
I can't imagine my parents giving me access to my college fund for any reason other than paying for school supplies and tuition.
Giving the daughter access to her college fund makes OP in that story a butthole. If it was intended strictly for college, then there should have been tighter control over that money.
They say college fund, but, since OP didn't mention taxes, it's possible it's just a regular savings account they they have earmarked for college. If it was the other kind, I feel like he would have mentioned it in the post and to the daughter. I say this because, if OP's position was about the daughter being irresponsible, then adding how she screwed up taxes strengthens his argument. So, unless further evidence to the contrary, I think we have to assume it isn't the tax exempt one.
Everything else is a valid point, but I still feel like the answer needs to be somewhat more tempered, as Rslash suggested. Like, cut off her access and say any college bills have to go through him? Only caveat with that is making sure OP doesn't become like some other parents from this subreddit who have used that authority to dictate where and for what the kid goes to college for. I also like the idea others have suggested of having the daughter and/or GF pay back the 5k.
I dont know how Rslash thinks "what she did wasnt sooo bad". It doesn't matter if she put 5 out of the 10k in there herself. COMMUNICATION. The fact she didn't say ANYTHING and was somehow hoping nobody would notice or bring it up?? That's TERRIBLE. That is basically betraying EVERYONE that has put money on that fund. And if there's no consequences, what's stopping her from saying "I will party my way through college, YOLO. ItS a OnE iN a lIFeTImE eXPeRiEnCE" Specially with the "IT'S MY MONEY I CAN DO WHAT I WANT WITH IT" mentality.
Specially when 10k is a "chunk". Not half, as to imply there were 20k in the fund. At min there is 25k so the majority of it was NOT her doing and she's just spending it nilly willy because she doesn't need to stay "A COUPLE OF WEEKS" for a 3-4 day convention.
OP is in the right, trying to show there should be more responsibility. He should only grant access back to the fund IF and AFTER she pays back the 10k like she says she will.
@@pretzelicious4200I agree - punishment should be that, okay since she can't be trusted, she doesn't have access to it anymore. Idk why her mom and grandma are fine with her literally breaking the rules despite being told no on the topic, and now that's she's getting what she wants, she's learning it's okay to keep doing this. Disobey mom and dad, steal the money that's intended for her education to do what she wants. I say, OP leaves her down the $10k, so when shes in school, she will realize the depth that money costed. Congratulations daughter, you got rid of money for your future for a small possibility of meeting the supernatural cast.
@@VicGeorge2K6how is the dad bad in this situation in the slightest..? You’re just wrong.
The book story really ticks me off. As someone who has difficulty reading books, especially novels (quite possibly an undiagnosed learning disability), it's incredibly presumptuous, callous, and judgmental (not to mention ablest) to assume that just because someone doesn't regularly read books, that means they are uneducated or dumb. I see this attitude a lot in the BookTube/BookTok/Bookstagram communities. Reading is not easy for everyone, and not everyone enjoys it. Everyone absorbs information in different ways.
It's like watching TV just because you finished one of Collen Hoover's doesn't make you a rocket scientist
Non easy for some people, and also just not enjoyable for some. Not everyone likes to read for fun; they don't like sitting still with a book.
This is coming from someone who loves to read for most of the day.
Like the old saying goes: "You don't judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree."
@danielbrant6740 That's not even applicable here because it's not a lack of ability. Some people just don't like to read, or are busy
The hilarity I find in the BookTube, especially channels like The Book Leo and yes I'm totally namedropping because I watched the video recently, are so incredibly NOT well read they have no idea of the background lore many novels are based on and they pretend to be critics on these novels when they don't have the background or knowledge to give a criticism in the first place. Book Leo went on a long rant she claimed she researched about "why are faeries suddenly hot" a while ago and her comments included "Sarah J. Maas made up the Bogge." And I'm like no, *the Bogge is literally out of lore*, Maas pilfers relentlessly from lore for literally everything. And Book Leo also went on about other things that made me think she's had ZERO education on either Shakespeare or Ovid's Metamorphosis if she thinks fairies were invented by Shakespeare or Shakespeare didn't pilfer shamelessly from Meta.
Not to mention there are literally creatures from lore that seduce and sleep with humans called "fairy lovers" and constant examples of otherworldly people luring humans to other realms as lovers from Art's brother Connla being lured to the other world by a girl with an apple, to Niamh and Oisin, so it's not even a "this millenia" thing she was picking at. ... and based on your user name I get the feeling you know the stories I'm talking about.
ANY WAY tldr: BookTube are a bunch of hypocrites calling people dumb while literally not being as knowledgable as they like to claim themselves.
OMG that 3rd story....I went to college and graduated, but my favorite book is "Where The Sidewalk Ends" by Shel Silverstein. I was introduced to the book when I was 9-10 years old (I'm 46 now) and even owned a copy. Being snobs about reading is so stupid.
I love that book and the movie. Those friends are terrible
I love that book!
Yea really
Chick-fil-A story: Dad shouldn't have to suggest to try a taste first before going "all in" with the creation. His son is at an age to figure that out on his own. So dad may or may not have had the thought of a taste test, but it's irrelevant, as the son needs to learn.
Damn the third story just because the guy didn’t go to college doesn’t mean he’s not smart
Op also forgot that her husband works on NUCLEAR reactors.
particularly seeing as collages are largly 'pay to play'. so many rich arseholes that know fuck all about anything 'graduate' from collage. sure if you get in on your grades and study thibgs that actually require a formal education (science, law, medical etc) collage is a must (but again, you can also get that through the military and maybe even better and hey, they PAY you to do it) but if your just going to collage because 'that's how you get a job' you are so dumb its not funny.
Hell, my step father is military trained, he is now a lecturer teaching at a university. OP could end up in a similar position while his wife would be looking down at him for not going to collage. not to mention she will probably find it hard to find a good job with her English lit degree or whatever.
employers are starting to realise that collage degrees are not everything and some actively avoid hiring collage graduates as a lot of them are unable to think outside the box.
Story 3 infuriates me. I read children's classics like the BFG, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Matilda, the Witches, etc. So OP, YTA. I hope that you see the error of your ways and soon.
Story 2: OP could use this as a perfect demonstration of how a bank/credit cards work (something school typically doesn't teach you!). Set up an agreement to pay back X amount of money each month with a logical interest rate until it is paid back and, if the payment is late or missed, it couples on extra fees and extra punishment of some other form (since credit score isn't really a thing in this case). Money management isn't always about spending money that you only have (even though that is optimal). Handling your credit is important too, since credit cards are basically the only good way to increase your credit score to help with loans for houses or cars. Turn this moment into a teaching moment!
It’s also a really really shit parenting idea to dictate what people can do with their own money. His daughter has clearly been saving money and not spending much, it’s also worth noting at the time of the story she is literally like a month off adulthood she isn’t 14
@@theveganduolingobird7349 He also clearly didn't teach his daughter on good spending habits. Even for two people 10k is a lot to spend on a vacation. Is she buying first class plane tickets and expensive hotels?
I wake up for school and listen to rslash while doing my makeup, love reading comments of ppl listening to rslash while getting ready or going to work
It's always 4pm where I'm from, when Dabney uploads a new video, so I have done my cleaning,made food for my family,kids and husband and get alone time listening and eating! What a wonderful way to spend the evening! Hope you do well at school!
The College fund story, im never against people spending money on themselves and living 1 in a lifetime experiences, but the way she went about it showed clear and extreme inmaturity with money management, paying your own travel expenses is one thing, but paying your friends plane, entrance and hotel expenses out of your own college fund is ludicrous. And it seems she did everything on a whim, so yeah righ decision locking her out of the fund, but she will be the asshole if she takes it away completely. }
It’s not immature at all. She technically used most of her contribution to the trip and told her dad, she’d pay back. She clearly has the job to pay it back if she contributed almost the same amount as her parents. Her family is even saying they’ll help her because OP’s taking this to the extreme. He is NOT mad about the money and the nonexistent immaturity. He is actually mad about his daughter going to the trip when he said no
@@Art_museum28you are so completely wrong lol. It is extremely immature and if she can't manage and plan her money, let alone COMMUNICATE to the people who put the money into the account what her intents are, then she can't be trusted with the whole account. It's basic financial planning. She should pay back that 10K before getting any access, so she can learn how to budget and the importance of making good financial decisions.
I wish I had a dad like hers.
@@NikolaiWowe she did plan. She even said she was going to pay it back. She’s 18 by the time she left. She technically didn’t have to tell OP anything. Maybe she could’ve told him, but from the sound of it, she figured he’d find a way to punish her. It’s not even clear if the amount she took will effect her chances in college. If the issue was the money, OP would’ve allowed her to pay it back. But he didn’t because it’s not the issue. He’s mad that she went at all, not how she got there
@@Art_museum28unless she’s going to a different country, a vacation does not cost 10k. This is quite obviously the beginning of a habit.
On top of that, it doesn’t matter if she says if she’s going to pay it back. She just turned 18, and she’s in no position to pay it back for years. 10k is enough to be a college loan. Just saying that she is going to pay it back is NOT a plan. It’s an end. A plan is a step-by-step, day-by-day schedule. She did NOT have a plan to do so. These were obviously nothing but empty words to get out of trouble.
She IS immature. At 18, she should be thinking about her next steps to secure her future so that she CAN afford things like this next time.
Story 3: my husband is retired navy and he was an ET. His schooling he did for the Navy was way harder and more demanding than when he went to “actual college”. They crammed into a year what you’d normally learn in 2-4 years. Plus he then had to do hands on training immediately after on an intense deployment where they almost came to blows with China. So yeah you’re the a-hole 10 times over. I wouldn’t be surprised if Jody is visiting this woman’s house when her husband is away. 😒edit to add: military education 99% of the time gives you credits in college too. Cause you know it counts 🤦🏼♀️
Picky eater story: As one myself, OP is NTA. I’m old enough to know what foods I do and don’t like, and on the rare occasion I do try something new, I always make sure to take a little bit. I understand that’s a kid, though, but I agree he has to learn. Hopefully OP’s child can eventually learn what they do and don’t like.
The 14yr old boy story about food.
Not the AH, This is how entitlement is made. I was given more food and stuff like that, doesn't lead to a good or happy person.
College fund story : Once she pays back the money BY HERSELF (no help from mommy or MIL) then OP can open the account. Teach her she cant always rely on others to get her out of her screw-ups
First she should pay back the money with whatever she has in savings. Second, she should get her gf to reimburse for her share since it wasn’t officially her money to use on her.
but OP said the daughter did put about 5000 of it in there herself. So some of that was already her own savings and if that's true then is is her choice to use those savings however she likes, if its a poor choice or not its still hers to make. and if she really did only spend the same amount she put in herself and not OP's money then I think he's overreacting.
I heard this story on Am I the Jerk channel. I agree with everything. It's clear that she is extremely spoiled and is used to getting her way. I got shamed for stating that she already learned her lesson. Not if she's throwing a tantrum and expects everyone to run to her rescue to save her from her screw-ups. She certainly hasn't learned if she still believes that.
She didn’t screw up. She’s already been working and has contributed a bit to the fund. She used her own money to pay for the trip and she literally said she’d be paying it back after the trip. OP is punishing his daughter because she found a way to go and he didn’t want her to go. OP’s sounding super controlling and is back he can’t control her
@@Art_museum28she's spending her college fund (mostly by the parents) to pay for her friend as well. Lmfao. Spoiled. And all that for supernatural? 😂😂😂😂
TECHNICALLY OP never said his daughter wouldn’t get her college fund anymore, he just revoked her access to it so she can’t take any more money out. Which TBH she shouldn’t have been able to remove money from such an important account to begin with!
The third story also unfortunately has a pretty sad update. Basically OP and her husband were now in a rough patch thanks to her behavior, but they hadn’t made up yet because her husband was deployed on a submarine mission of some kind and would be gone for several weeks. And unfortunately, a terrible accident occurred on the submarine the husband was on, and he was exposed to a MASSIVE amount of radioactive material and is no currently fighting for his life in the hospital with radiation sickness. The OP is understandably devastated and terrified that she may very well lose her husband, and one of the things he told her while he was conscious in the hospital was something like “maybe if I’d read more books, I would’ve been smart enough to avoid this” and it absolutely gutted OP. So yeah, OP is currently dealing with immense guilt for her behavior and terrified that her husband is going to die, and the poor husband is fighting for his life and will likely suffer lifelong health complications from this if he somehow pulls through.
That third story update is tragic. On the one hand op should feel bad about insulting her husband like that. But on the other, unless he recovers, they may never be able to reconcile.
Where did you see this update. l wanted to read it and its not mentioned in the original post nor is it a different post posted by the same account.
That’s awful! Prayers to the young man and all who were exposed. 😢🙏 Those subs are extremely dangerous yet necessary, unfortunately, in our world. I salute anyone who takes that post. 🫡 I’m having a difficult time feeling bad for the wife, she should have never been such an ungrateful, snobby, prat to begin with.
@@Sorchia56op is misinformed based on another youtuber manufacturing an update on it, I've checked the actual reddit account and no such update exists on standard reddit or way back machine archives
The third story's update is fake.
Private school story - This is one of those comversations OP and the husband should have discussed before marriage. Maybe even bring the BIL in and explain the situation. But it's too late for that now. OP needs to stand her ground, let her husband AND the kids know that she is NOT the one paying the bill, the daughter is basically a daughter to the BIL and she is NOT going to take this opportunity away from the daughter. Now as far as everything else (Christmas, birthdays, etc) if the other kids are not treated equally, then there is a problem.
In my opinion though, ifthe husband keeps insisting the new step-daughter goes to public school, OP could be reaching divorce territory. This is why this should ahve been discussed beforehand.
A ton of Navy schools are WAY harder than regular college. The nuclear program in particular is notorious for its academic rigor and results in a pretty aggressive washout rate. One of the highest attrition rates outside of special operations forces.
Books story:You don't have the right to insult his education in anyway when he works on stuff more important that your existence,YTA
Chick Fil A story:.............Ahh yes,all the more reason pepole lose hope in tiktok kids ever doing proper stuff,NTA
That woman stole the wedding dress, she buried the dress behind everything so it wouldn't be "found".
And it was funny how friend accused OP of rummaging through her drawers when she got defensive. Doubt the dress could fit in her dresser drawer.
"Fairy/Vampire smut" .....im currently working through the Southern Vampire Mysteries.......nice timing😂😂😂😂😂😂
story 1: OP either missed some red flags or the husband kept up a pretty good mask until they got married, and in a shocking twist, instead of marrying OP for her money, he married her for her brother in law's money! I mean, I get wanting to have a husband and all, but OP sure didn't pick the right one. I know reddit jumps to "DIVORCE!" a lot, but in this case I would say annulment at the very least.
It's not that OP missed some red flags. People like this don't show their true colors until they're married b/c then they think, "What's mine is mine, and yours is mine" when it comes to money and assets. The problem is, OP never sent her daughter it was her Brother and SIL, and of course, OP's husband just thinks that he's "Entitled" the "Family Money."
@@LilDevyl17 yeah like i said, if there were no red flags (ie husband treating service workers like crap), the dude kept the mask up pretty good.
@@LilDevyl17nah, some people are so insecure in themselves that they would rather eat shit for the rest of their lives rather than be single for any period of time. remember how this person got knocked up as a young? And then, she manages to find a husband like this? Yeah, this seems like a neversingle. If this person dated for any length of time more than a few months and not have their lonely goggles on, this exact conversation about how the daughter is going to a private school on the sister’s dime, should come up and that situation about the stepkids going to public school is still there.
@@rudyardganuelas6254 well yeah there's that too. Some people are terrified of being alone and have such garbage self-esteem they don't believe they're entitled to anything better OR the sudden switch to abuser mode of their partner takes them off-guard so bad they think they did something to deserve being treated that way.
I'm not sure if I'm reading too much into the friend's response, of the wedding dress story. OP stated that it was something like 2 years of asking the friend to look for the dress, with a response of "can't find it, still looking" (if I remember right). But as soon as OP sent the text about finding the dress, the friend responsed with ... "You were looking in my closet" ... which suggests to me that the friend knew (or possible knew) where the dress was the whole time.
one of the few things i miss about living in america is being able to watch new rslash vids in the morning instead of before bed
no it’s literally so sad that i can’t watch his videos until i’m already at school since his videos get posted the second my school starts
How is it that friend couldnt find the dress but when op found it, friend automatically knew op found it in the closet
For the college fund story, I think a good compromise is to lock the account until she pays back that 5000
She doesn't need to, it was the EXACT amount SHE put into it.
@@black1917she put in 5K and stole 10K
@@justasentientmclarenp1879it’s not stealing if that money was meant for her, also it would have been only 5k “stolen” if the other 5k was what she personally put into the account
@@StrangeHooves No, not really. If you set up a fund for something, you only use it for that purpose. Using your fund for other stuff is immature and is a pretty easy way to go broke. Also, by the way "only" 5k is still a very, very huge amount of money.
@@DarkSlumber sure an immature/misuse of funds but they were meant for her, not someone else so “stolen” isn’t exactly the correct term here. And yes I know 5k is a lot of money, but the use of “only” was because in context of 10k, 5k is significantly less.
I have read the third story, and she's neglecting that her husband is in the NAVY for SUBMARINE NUCLEAR REACTORS. That takes more smarts than while high school or college could ever give and need. Just because he hasn't read many "books" like them, doesn't mean he isn't well read. He might not be able to tell you everything about a book series like Harry Potter, but I sure as hell can bet you couldn't say a dang thing about Nuclear Reactors on Subs. She's the AH, no questions asked, she called her husband dumb, to friends, in front of him, and doesn't seem to understand how rude that is.
Story 4: hi, someone who struggles with food aversions here! Food aversions (typically what “picky” kids deal with that just gets brushed off) aren’t something that you can really turn off or “push through” because all it will end with is mental anguish and vomit on everyone’s shoes. OP shouldn’t buy him a whole other meal, I agree. That’s not why he’s the asshole. He’s the asshole because he criticized and put down his kid for wanting to try new food. Encourage him! Maybe tell him to cut the sandwich into four and try it on one piece so that if he doesn’t like it he still has the rest of the food to eat. But OP YTA for putting your kid down instead of teaching him and encouraging better practices.
Story 1: for safety reasons I don't think you should put him down at the parent when they come to your daughter, because someone's so foolish to thing he has a right to make someone pay for 3 other kids probably isn't above sabotage to get his way.
Reading story: as someone who has to read/write/review +1,000 page spec manuals for their job on a daily basis… yeah I don’t read very many books anymore. I just don’t find it relaxing anymore. And yes, I have multiple post graduate degrees.
Story 3
I work in oncology, not a PhD but I work with a lot of them. Staying current requires a huge amount of reading, so doing yet more reading for fun is at the bottom of the list. If you ask them what's the last book they read, they'd probably tell you something like the AJCC Cancer Staging Manual. Reading books for fun isn't the mark of a good education, it's the mark of liking reading books.
Honestly military education is like taking summer classes but in half the time which is already half and also 2 years of school all in that time. Especially nuclear stuff. Once you get to CNT and nuclear stuff, suicide rates jump due to the stress.
So with the wedding dress one, there is a rumour that there is an update on what happened after OP gave the dress to her sister, but some have been unable to find it.
Regardless of whether or not it exists, I will just say that OP shouldn’t have said a bloody thing about taking the dress back. Then, if the friend comes asking about it, OP will know that both the theft and burying it under items in the closet was intentional, and possibly expected that someone might look for it.
The dress: shes malicious since she automatically knew that op was in the wardrobe
"NO MEANS NO!"
Aunt probably: "No means yes!"
Or his No just means that he really means yes but he doesn’t know it yet. The aunt and her minions are crazy
“Military education and college education are simply not the same.” As someone that has taught on both sides… I agree.
The wedding dress story: Nta I feel like your friend was trying to keep the dress so she can sale it for a really high price for it
Others report that in an update that’s what she was doing. The friend sells vintage wedding dresses and wanted to sell OPs
@@lorilancaster5917the update apparently doesn’t exist I checked Reddit
Story 3: OP is correct, military schooling is not comparable to college. It's *several times harder.* Seriously, in what world does OP think studying while in the military, of all places, is easier than studying as a civvie? I'm in the military myself, and nearly all cadets with a civvie degree struggle to pass even the written portion of their basic training, let alone keep their brains functioning after the physical portion. Military academy grads do a lot better overall, and officer-candidates usually blow it out of the water. OP is terribly uninformed, at best.
"oh he only has a military eDuCaTiOn, so its not as elite as us college folk."
Girl, he works on frikken nuclear subs. I guarentee the reading comprehension skills for his work manuals are waaaaaay more demanding than whatever barnes & noble special you picked up.
Also, there was an update. Shortly after that post, the husband was called away. There was an incident on his sub and he was critically injured. He was in the hospital with potentially fatal radiation. He made a lighthearted joke about how maybe if he read more he wouldnt have been injured, and she's regreting everything.
Anyone that works on the Silent Service is well educated BY REQUIREMENT! It's not simply being a grunt with a gun, especially in a sub.
She is a MAJOR asshole. Especially after that update. I can't imagine telling people my loved one isn't educated in anyway. Hell I'll bring up the fact my cousins have essentially a middle school education but went back for their GED and had/have great paying jobs. Education and intelligence isn't just about book knowledge there are many types of intelligence and people need to get of their high horse about it.
Source? because I checked the account the post came from and there is no update whatsoever
Where is that, I looked up the person, and they haven't replied or updated
I'm starting to feel this was for attention
Story three is bonkers to me how tf you imply the dude who works on nuclear reactors isn't smart
9:25 jokes on you, there the same person lol
I love your after story comments, feels more alive than a drone reading reddit.
Story 4: If you don’t like food if the only change is that it became leftovers I will put money on you having sensory issues. That being said, I don’t disagree with the dad’s choices. He was warned and he can now eat food at home.
Yea fully agree with this. That kid clearly has a sensory issue
Like most leftover chicken has BAD TEXTURE
He was warned but also has been sent a clear message that trying new foods results in punishment. Not sure this method will work out the way the dad wants it to.
Meh, agree and disagree. I will admit that I was a very picky eater until I was about 14. I frequently would refuse to eat leftovers, even if it was food I liked. Eventually I did grow out of that but it took me having no food other than leftovers. The dad is absolutely in the right here. And this is coming from someone who has sensory issues.
Story 2 - NTA Maybe OP shouldn't take the funds away completely, but restrict their use until the daughter can prove that she can be trusted. Unless by "taking away" he means remove all her direct access to the account. She's shown that she is not ready for the responsibility of managing that much money. If I were OP, I would be paying all expenses myself, and giving her a strict allowance. I'd also insist that she work to repay that amount. That account was for a specific purpose, and she took money for a completely different purpose. She needs to experience some sort of consequence for her actions.
Story 3 - Holy shit, OP seriously threw her husband under the bus! She's right, college and military educations are not the same - military schooling is HARDER! You have to be smart to work as a nuke in the Navy (my brother was one), they're not like Homer Simpson AT. ALL. OP had better grovel and apologize like she never had before, or the next thing SHE will be reading are divorce papers.
Story 4 - NTA 14 is plenty old enough to suffer an afternoon of being hungry after choosing to not eat the food he ordered. It's not as if OP made him pay him back for it too!
Story 5 - NTA That's not a friend, she's a thief.
Story 6 - NTA, and "No" is a complete sentence. Aunt isn't entitled to an explanation, and her child isn't entitled to a ride.
I highly doubtful she lost the dress, I think she decided to keep it and try to sale it online. A lot of women love vintage wedding dresses and OPS friend saw $$$$ in her eyes.
I don’t get why the friend wanted to steal OP’s family wedding dress. I mean, maybe the friend really liked the dress or thought “Hey! Free rainy day dress to sell.” 🤷♀️
People have commented that there is an update which OPs friend planned to sell her dress and was looking at potential buyers. The so called friend made a scene at OPs sister’s wedding accusing that the dress was stolen. She couldn’t provide proof and the woman who originally made the dress was there to verify who the dress belongs too
According to another comment there was an update saying the "friend" crashed the wedding, said the dress was hers, got called out by the woman who made it and it turns out the "friend" sells vintage dresses
@@ElvhenRogue I knew it! Ha! Thanks for the update!
@@lorilancaster5917 omg! Thanks!
Maybe
I'd have much less of a problem with story #1 if the daughter didn't pay for her friends entire trip too. Using the money for herself is bad enough, but paying for her friends entire vacation trip is really bad.
I was looking for this point. The daughter didn't just pay for herself, but her girlfriend too, so if she had just paid for herself, then it would've been just her money. (5k) So no theft from the parent's money, just wasting her own. And OP didn't mention contacting the girlfriend's parents, cause do they know what their daughter is doing and that her entire trip was paid for by another family's money?
Also, I agree with other commenters that OP should not have the account in her name since she's shown such disrespect and lack of financial understanding. OP should pay for the tuition when the time comes with the money in the account since there's no longer any money in it that was put in by the daughter anyway, so the money will get used as intended by the family members who have contributed.
My college was paid for by my parents, but I never had access to the tuition money so I never had the temptation to use the money for other purposes, and I was and am so grateful that my parents worked hard and I don't have that bill looming over me.
Just my 2 cents anyways.
Thanks for another video RSlash!
Um guys, that's Story #2, #1 was the Private School being paid for by Brother in Law/Uncle
@@durk5331 lol, I didn’t even notice the story #. I just assumed it was the story about the college fund 🤷♀️
Yea I went to college with my parents paying for it and the only money I saw was the money I earned from my summer job. That money I can spend how ever I want but it has to last me the year so that's how I learned to manage my money.
Gonna be honest, I think that the other people who donated money into the account DO have a say in whether or not it's ok. If they put in over 5k between them and don't have an issue with it then I don't think she should have to pay it back.
I do however agree with taking her access away, and that he should directly pay any tuition and other fees directly from his account. At the same time I agree with the family who say that her life shouldn't have to revolve around college for the funds. It never sat right with me to hear about parents refusing to give money they saved for college to their kids for other things because they don't want to go.
Who ever said that everything has to be fair in step families? I have a son and my ex had two boys. She was always going on about how everything needed to be fair. My family has is well off, hers is not. So one Christmas she's demanding that everything stays fair and that we spend the exact same amount on each boy, to the penny. It was a pain in the butt but i managed to do it, ended up spending about $700 on each child. Everything was going good. The day before Christmas a huge box shows up from my son's grandmother on his mother's side. She sent about 3K worth of stuff for my son. The were several smaller gifts for my step sons but no where near the 3K mine got. My ex blew up at me about how it wasn't fair, blah blah blah. I just started laughing because its not like i could control what people outside our household spend or sent. I'm so glad we're not together any more LOL
So on story 2, hasn't rslash said before that setting aside a savings for a child, means that money belongs to that child? Yes the purpose might be for college, but if she chooses a trade school and only uses a fraction of the savings, does that mean the parents get the rest back?
In a specific college fund he's played both sides because her taking the money out kinda messes with tax purposes, but he has been on both sides.
College funds aren’t taxed. If money from that fund is used for non-educational purpose, then it’s subject to taxation.
it wasnt her money yet the parents set it asside for college so its their parents savings. till she is 18 and its on her account its her parents money. at least the aprt they put into it.
also in most cases the parents use it to pay it for their kid not give them the money directly so yeha if she didnt went to college the parents could keep their money or repurpose it for an home or something
@@robcubed9557 They say college fund, but, since OP didn't mention taxes, it's possible it's just a regular savings account they they have earmarked for college. If it was the other kind, I feel like he would have mentioned it in the post and to the daughter. I say this because, if OP's position was about the daughter being irresponsible, then adding how she screwed up taxes strengthens his argument.
So, unless further evidence to the contrary, I think we have to assume it isn't the tax exempt one.
The daughter also put money into the account too. She's literally taking her own monet out of her savings
First story: that really needed to be discussed before the marriage, this sounds like it's going to be a massive, potentially relationship ending, problem. OP is still NTA; her husband better keep his thoughts to himself, but OP might want to warn her brother about this discussion just in case her husband has some sort of entitled rage. She needs to make it very clear that she will never back her husband in this.
When a story is good i don't mind if it's a classic, a bestseller, kids book or a dime novel!
As a Supernatural fan, I understand wanting to go to conventions, but is it really a once in a lifetime opportunity? The cast do conventions all the time and, even though the show has ended, they've said they're happy to continue the cons as long as fans are still interested, which we very much are.
All in all, I can see both sides of the argument.
Story 2: Yo. The daughter “STOLE” $5k from the college fund, and your response is to tell OP to tread carefully? Really?! In any other circumstance, you know what stealing $5k gets you as a punishment? PRISON! OP said no, she refused to accept it as the answer, stole money to spend on a trip INCLUDING PAYING HER FRIENDS WAY, and now is suffering the consequences of that action. OP is right! She is showing incredible immaturity and OP is teaching the daughter a VERY valuable lesson. Mess around, find out. The family thinking OP is in the wrong can shut up.
*Story 3* I read books all the time and I literally said outloud "1984" right before rslash. The fact that I read that book in high school does not detract from how AMAZING of a book it is!! I often read ahead of the class when we were assigned that book because I enjoyed it so much. That doesnt mean i am uneducated or dont read!
The dress story: OP is overly naive to think it wasn't malicious when so many things are proof to the contrary.
One, friend asks to wear it to a wedding. When OP asks for it back, friend suddenly claims they can't find it. Then how were they going to wear a dress they couldn't find to said wedding.
Two, friend is upset OP was looking through her stuff for OP's property instead of being elated OP found it. Odd behavior for someone who's not being malicious to their friend, but OK.
I'm suree there's another if you reflect more on it, but i can't think of one beyond these two, which should give a working brain the logical conclusion that this friend is no friend of OP.
If your favorite book is 1984 (it’s mine too-but saying a book about the terrors of totalitarianism is a favorite is itself frightening. Better to say it is the book you respect most for its strong warning), you might be interested that a ‘side-sequel’ was published just this month. It’s called Julia, written by Sandra Newman. It is the events of the original book from the perspective of the original protagonist Winston Smith’s girlfriend Julia. It is written in the same vein, but is in many ways more horrifying, but also hopeful. I highly recommend.
The last story had an update. The aunt called his job and accused him of being ableist. Since many of the workplace's clientele were disabled, his work firs suspended, then fired him. The nephew, who reminder is 14, broke into the house, took the car keys and stole the car, totaling it. And there was something he was having to get a defense laywer for. So bc his aunt wouldnt accept "no" OP lost his car, and his job.
Ugh, can't believe OP has to be related to such entitled jerks
Jeebus, that’s insane
Do he sue the aunt and work?
@@jessilynallendilla5014I hope he does. CPS should also be informed since how else the the nephew get to OPs car, his keys, and steal the car to begin with?
Where did you find this? Just curious bc I don’t see it.
For the third story: As someone who has done both military education and college education, she's right. Military education is much harder. My schooling had an 85% to pass standard, drill sergeants, and uniforms. My college schooling had a 60% to pass standard, teachers that asked us to call them by their first name, and I could go in pjs if I wanted to.
Not to minimize college education, obviously my degree is something I'm proud of, but to act like a military education is lesser to college just because it isn't 4 years is ridiculous. There's a reason just my military schooling covered an entire second degree
As someone who regularly reads fairy-vampire smut...you're right about the nuclear reactor technician being smarter 😂
Story 2: OP is the BH. People have no idea how that break between highschool and higer education can be. If I had taken that break, when I could afford it, when I was so tired of school, instead of listening to both my parents and going straight to college, I'm convinced I would not have dropped out and my life would be amounting to something right now.
A break is fine but don't waste the fund made for college
"You misunderstand" "listen h0e I'm with you only because you asked me do date you I was extremely desperate and my dumbass braincells decided you're the best person
Third story: Before I go into my take on it, I want to say that I'm an English major, so I had to read and analyze a LOT of college-level classics. I also read a lot of books, in general.
Conversely, my husband is an IT tech, and he can do nearly anything with a computer, from software issues to actual physical computer repair.
I mention these backgrounds to say that, just because my husband isn't familiar with a lot of books that it doesn't mean he is any less intelligent than I. Between our different skill sets and other knowledge we have outside of those, we're both pretty intelligent. Not to mention, there are many different types of intelligence.
My point is I woukd never insult my husband by claiming he isn't intelligent just because he hasn't analyzed, for example, a TS Elliot poem.
All of that having been said, I say the following:
GRRL, not only are you the asshole, you also don't get how intelligence works. He may not have read a lot of literature after high school, but that doesn't make him any less intelligent. I mean, working with nuclear reactors?! That *can't* be easy!
3- YTA, I’m a college student, and the number of books you have read isn't a sign of intelligence! OP and her friends are the type of people who think anything outside of classic Western books isn't real literature!
The story about op's wedding dress is that her deadbeat friend was trying to keep the dress and not give it back to the rightful owner and the last story about op who ordered himself a mustang from a car dealership is that op needs to change his phone number and change his Facebook settings to private and cut ties with his side of the family and extended family
Nuclear Power School graduate here. That school is 2 and a half years of going with 4 hours of sleep a day, most days, sometimes less, sometimes none. When I went thru the attrition rate from beginning to end was over 80 percent. If her husband made it thru then he is far smarter than her stuck up friends.
For story 2 the problem isn't how much money the daughter put into the account, it's that the money was set aside specifically for college. The daughter spent 10 THOUSAND DOLLARS on a vacation even if she put 5 into the account.
Who spends 10k on a vacation? When they don't actually have the money to do so?
Exactly. Especially if they will be staying for WEEKS, that means the 10K isn't the end of the spending. They will still need food, transportation and entertainment funds, PLUS money for the convention and souvenirs. The 10k was only the beginning.
On the food issue one: I don’t think OP is TA, however, if the son would rather go hungry than eat food that’s touching each other etc, I’d say he DOES have sensory issues 🤷🏻
But that $5000 she put in the account was put in over the course of years and now she's going to have to figure out how to get $10,000 to put back into the account in the span of months
And? She could do half of the thing she want with $5000, the OP went not enough, because I bet if the daugther pay all the money back she will get acess to the account again, but she will think better when she try to do this again.
The last story. My sister is autistic and has Cerebral Palsy. Although she has control of her bladder, shes very reactive and likes to push buttons etc. Because of this Im VERY reluctantant to be alone in my car with her even if shes in the back. NTA. I would react the dame
Second story: If the rest of the family was willing to pay, then WHY SHE DECIDED TO STEAL RIGHT AWAY INSTEAD OF ASKING OTHER FAMILY MEMBERS?! Besides, according to OP's math she only put 5k in the account and she took for the event double that, so she took her own 5k ans stole another 5k. I say id you do the crime you do the time. NTA.
She didn’t steal. She was working putting her money into it too. She basically used her money and said,”look dad, I’ll pay it back later.” OP is being immature and basically throwing a tantrum because,”Oh no. My now legal adult daughter isn’t under my thumb anymore”
😂 I’m dying at the 2nd story because I’m literally going to that supernatural convention next year
Disabled son story: No doesn’t mean no for that aunt because I’m sure she guilts or leverages her son’s disability to get everything she wants.
Especially considering people have reported that in an update the aunt gets OP fired from his job reporting he is ableist. Then some how OPs nephew gets access to OPs car keys, steals the car and totals it.
@@lorilancaster5917there is no update on reddit about that, I think the person post that is attention seeking
14:37 Dude, this is really an easy case to crack. OP told this "friend" that she found the dress and then the "friend" told her exactly _where_ the dress was despite claiming to not be able to find it before. That's basically a Matlock moment right there.
A convention is not a once in a lifetime opportunity. By any stretch.
THANK YOU! I went on convention this year. The conventions themselves are not "once in a lifetime" opportunities. A trip to Australia is. But the daughter is so incredibly stupid.
Story 3: Husband: Works in the NUCLEAR field in the military
OP: He's not educated enough cuz he didn't read Twilight like me!!!!