The way I best describe OCPD is that I am a slave to myself. I relate so much with every point: I take little to no enjoyment in the process of completing my tasks (and only get minor temporary relief when completed), get lost in the details of a project or terrified of doing something because I'm scared of making mistakes, and am OBSESSED with to-do lists and productivity. The overscrupulosity appears more in my rigid adherence to goals and frustrating inability to spend money on "unnecessary" things. I don't collect things though - I'm the exact opposite: constantly purging, cleaning, and feeling anxious about owning items. My ability to work with others and compromise has significantly improved.
Same, to relieve anxiety I re-write my to do list over and over but I can't get anything done. Then the unfinished tasks and to-do's are always in the back of my mind causing anxiety and worthless feeling of not being productive. I constantly discard items (to relieve guilt of spending on things I do not use or plan to use and I like my soroundings neat) then I hoard my money and I can't seem to spend it (walking around in worn out clothing f.e.), it is taking away from my mental space and quality of life. I discovered OCPD because I was researching how to spend money and overcome compulsive saving, thinking I was a frugal minimalist. (it started out as me wanting to save, but spending has become immensely uncomfortable, now I am thinking about forcing myself to do the things my anxious thought's do not allow). Can one cure himself trough forcing behaviors?
I do most of these things except the lists. I try to make lists, but I get so obsessed that my list may be missing something that I was supposed to do, or I get so obsessed with getting everything on the list done that I become avoidant or feel like a failure if I can’t do it all or have to change the list bc something comes up. It’s like I can’t be normal and see it as a guide or just cross something off if I don’t need to do it anymore or if something comes up. I’m a slave to it, I over rely on it, and am afraid of it.
Everything you just said is exactly how I feel. I was diagnosed a week ago today. I have a lot more clarity and a problem that I can be proactive about.
I agree with everything you've said; but what really hit me was the constant purging, cleaning, etc. My husband and I call it "elimination" and it's an every day issue. I will use certain soap dispensers over others because one is almost out of soap so I can throw that package away...I mean COME ON!
Finnaly, oh finally something I can identify with! I've searched YEARS for the answer and must admit, I'm a bit angry that not a single one of my psychiatrists or psychologists ever told me about this personality disorder. I literally listed them all of these symptoms!
Dude, same. I've even told mine I think I have a personality disorder. I think they've got the idea that clients will bolt out the door when they tell the client they probably have a personality disorder that needs to be worked on. It's made clinicians fearful and gun-shy of giving diagnoses. They don't want to be the one who scared someone away who obviously needs a lot of help.
I don't think I've really told you how much I appreciate you doing these videos for us, and for that I am sorry. I really do appreciate you and all your hard work to educate us on mental health!
I score 8/8 (Perfection :). OCPD is very difficult to identify mainly for a few reasons. 1/ Perfection in perceived differently by everybody. 2/The persons natural ability will dictate the level of perfection that can be achieved by the individual and observed by others. 3/If a OCPD sufferer is naturally good at something this can just look like they are a high achiever to others. 4/If a OCPD sufferer is bad at something they simply will avoid it so nobody will possible know. 5/If a OCPD sufferer is forced to do something that they are not good at and suffer major anxiety, they are offered sympathy by others (people are nice about it). Which makes them believe they did it perfectly so after they will get a big rush. But after self analysing they truly know they did bad and will become depressed. (i know trust me). 6/OCPD IS PERSONAL TO THAT PERSON NO OTHER PERSON CAN HAVE THE SAME IDEAS OF PERFECTION! So basically you can only help yourself by realising how OCPD effects you and others because of your behaviour and naturally because you are a perfectionist you will achieve your goal! :)
thank you so much for saying this, whenever I tell people I have OCPD they always say "But your so messy and unorganized how can you have that" but in my head everything is perfect and exactly where I want it. Like whenever people mess with my stuff like touch my clothes or move something it legit can cause an anxiety attack because it just doesn't "feel right" in my head
Agreed, though it is still a personality disorder needing to be gradually dealt with, focusing only on the positive perceptions is also a coping mechanism. This is why changing perception is tough (and having a professional guide helps), people must maintain functionality, how one implements it is the key. The misconception by the individual is that if positive coping strategies are removed the functionality will cease; when in fact, the strategies are masking dysfunction.
There is an overlap between OCPD and autism, having both, I used to find it hard to understand why everyone else didn’t think like me. Videos like this help me to see other perspectives. Thank you for the videos.
I've been treated with MDD for years.I could not improve much and yesterday my psychiatrist then diagnosed me with OCPD,and i think i have autism as well,but i cannot be too sure now that the symptoms are overlapping too much.I am starting my psychotherapy tomorrow and think will get clearer from that.
Ocpd has been ruining my life for about 15 years now. Has ruined relationships. Has made me be one of the best at work. Has made life miserable in general.
I feel that, too. Don’t let it ruin you. Try to accept yourself and others... it’s okay they are different. You have your own gifts and talents. I am a high achiever and feel like none of my coworkers can work at the same level. It frustrates me a lot. But I know they can get work done well their own way, at their own pace.
I think theres also an anxiety and a crippling indecisiveness that comes with OCPD. And like you said it stems from a fear of not being prepared or losing something important and in the moment it feels satisfying to have things a certain way but in the long run the inability to get rid of the stupidest things of sentimental value ends up becoming an emotional and physical burden in your life. It becomes very exhausting when you’re trying to move from one place to another. Thanks for the video!
I have OCPD and major depression (both diagnosed by my psychiatrist) so imagine how AWFUL it is. I'm a perfectionist when I can't even get anything done. So here where comes the feeling of guilt and worthlessness. It feels like the end of the world when I didn't finish everything on my to-do list. Even if it's as simple as "refill the water bottle". Like i know it is supposed to be okay if I couldn't do it today and had to do it tomorrow, i still can't take it. I feel worthless if I didn't do this simple task even if i finished 1000 difficult tasks. I have no control over it. But I'm trying with my psychiatrist to get over it.
I just diagnosed with OCPD and it felt great to know yourself more, I was struggling with my relationship especially with my boyfriend because I wanted from him to treat me in a perfect way “in my definition of perfect”, I know now that it was my mind, my way of thinking. Now I have the desire to change in a better way, I want to reach that gray mind-set not a black and white mind-set. Pray for me.
I love this video so much. As a mum with ocpd I am terrified of how it's affecting my daughter and my relationship with my fiance and this is the first time I've heard someone talk about it without judgement or condemnation. I don't want to make people miserable but my brain cries when things are not right. It's hard to find that balance
Not like I needed another "confirmation" but yep, pretty spot on. One thing to add, Id say it's less "comfort" than avoiding "discomfort" while those things still feel like chores. (sometimes) Everything feels like a chore to me.. Add anxiety and depression onto that and your world is in a state of chaos most of the time.
Sincere thanks for taking the time to make this helpful video. My mother displays most of these traits; she seeks "leisure" activities that involve planning and organizational rules (event planning and meetings). This personality disorder has a high incidence of behavioral transmission within a family; I see where my behavior has been reinforced toward OCPD strategies. Driving my mother to appointments involves her yelling at me; she narrates her every thought, and has endless expectations about each part of the route. I notice how overwhelmingly frustrated she gets whenever anything occurs spontaneously, often these occurances work out for the better -- but, she refuses to acknowledge it and rages for days. There are myriad "disruptions" to her daily tasks. Observing this, I often think it must be a nightmare in her head and how I should have more compassion for her. On my end, it feels like walking a tightrope over aligators. The rules change and become more complex, and the yelling is unsettling.
Thank you for believing that we can change. I've learned that I have this for over a year now, and all of ocpd is not a curse but I don't want my perfectionism to ruin my parenting ability, don't want it to hurt my relationships with friends and family, I want to change. I want to believe that it's possible for me to change.
Oh hey that sounds like me! Like all of it. Except that I usually can get rid of things that are worn down or worthless, sometimes it just takes a little while for me to convince myself I really won't need it again.
THANK YOU! I was diagnosed with OCPD in 2019, and it honestly rules my life. I need order in my life; I feel an intense need for rigidity and am relatively inflexible if things do not go to the plan that I have in my mind. I have obsession with rules - laws, legislation, rules in general - to the point of regularly pointing out the behaviour and actions of those around me, and often focussing on things such as the dangerous driving of other drivers to the point of anxiety attacks, feeling genuinely fearful, at my worse, that a friend or family member will cause me injury due to behaviour such as speeding, say even 5kms above, or accidentally running an amber light. I would only too often complete assessments with 500 - 1000 word over word count because I was preoccupied with explaining repeatedly in different manners, I wanted to ensure that my argument was perfect in my mind. I would work myself into crippling anxiety attacks in which I would vomit, suffer diarrhoea, punch walls, kick walls; sadly to this day, these behaviours are crippling at times of severe anxiety. Given my dual diagnosis, it's little wonder that I am only too often ruled by perfection and the inability to recognise and take pride in my successes and achievements but I wind-up feeling worthless and useless because I have the compulsive desire to compare and value others as "better" than myself.
I really enjoyed this video thanks for posting. I have noticed there are two distinct types of OCPD even though both types do share most traits overall. The two distinct types are one is a hoarder type who has difficulty throwing things away, and the other is the clean freak who compulsively cleans or tidies their surroundings yet who probably doesn’t have the same desire to compulsively shop or obtain as much stuff as the hoarder type and the cleaner type can also throw stuff away without as much of an issue about it. Both types that I have encountered have their own rigid schedules, habits and beliefs though. Be it political, lifestyle or spiritual they are both inflexible on whatever their beliefs are. I’ve also noticed the comorbidity of frequent occurrence of having both OCD and OCPD.
@@flyguyry1 SHUT THE DOOR, MOE OUT THE WAY, WHY YOU ALWAYS LATE, CLOSE THE CUPBOARD, HELP ME WITH THIS, THE GRASS ISN'T PERFECTLY CUT. He doesn't have a severe case but he still has it. Swear at one point I thought he was putting it on/being an edgelord because it was a "cool" thing to do, but no it's real. They act that dependents to their bosses but sociopaths to everyone else.
I love this. Thank you for making these videos Kati, they're really helpful in trying to get my friends/family to understand me better. I think it's important that people recognise that OCPD isn't the same as OCD.
Oh wow Kati,you've hit Mr right in the feels there.I've always been super ridged with my life and way I do things,and not being able to do certain things and people have often teased me and said I'm way over the top and must have ocd,and I've always explained that OCD is an obsessive need to count and have things done in certain numbers or patterns (in a nutshell anyway) but I never knew that OCPD was a thing ,and this video has really struck a chord with me as I identified with 6 out of 8 of those symptoms,so perhaps I should consult my doctor ,thank you for making me aware of this Kati 💖
I was recently diagnosed with this and videos like these really give me insight into my ways and i feel i finally understand how my mind works as opposed to other people. I'm still figuring out how to deal with this with my psychiatrist but i feel with time i can learn to live with it. I do have a question however: I sometimes feel like i can't let things go, is that a part of OCPD? for instance, i'll lay in my bed and i can't sleep because of something embarrassing that happend 10 years ago. I have this problem quite often.
I always thought I had a mild form of ocd. I've had trichotillomania since I was about 11 years old, and started having number related compulsions around the same time. However, much of my adult life I have felt burdened by my inability to waver on how I get things done. Recently it's been affecting my relationship with my roommates because I don't feel like they are "cleaning the right way." This was a very interesting video and I'm so glad to be introduced to this personality disorder. Definitely going to be seeking more help about dealing with it soon. Thanks for the great video and information!!
This exactly describes me.. especially lately. I am sacrificing friendships, pleasantness, peace, basically my life for a never-ending never gratifying checklist.. it's Soo exhausting..
@@staybalancedn They're exacting and demanding. The fearfulness with which they live their lives drives them to control everything they think they can to try to prevent certain problems, real or imagined.
Thank you! This was spot on! I wish I'd been able to understand this long ago. I worked myself sick (literally) cleaning my house and making sure it was 1,000% visitor ready at all times. But when company came over, I'd resent any 'mess' created and often said "not having them over again".. now I have Lupus. Unable to do much. lesson learned.
I had a father like this, at least before his last stroke. The stroke changed his character significantly. Best way to describe living like this is a "concentration camp", rules applied to everybody in the family except to himself. It took me 33 years of headbutting with him before he admitted I made a man of myself he could never for himself. I achieved this by creativity, bold action, open-mindedness, risk-taking, practicality, try and fail methods...everything he condemned full-heartedly :)
I recently got diagnosed with OCPD, I have 3 whiteboards with lists on doing from films and books I've watched/read, people I've met, events I've been to and up coming events, I have been doing up to 14.5hr work days helping others with their work as well doing my own, I'm always overconscientous and inflexible, I would rather be massively stressed but do all the work myself than delegate tasks to others unless they do it my way but even then I have to check their work over before accepting it and I always get told I'm stubborn and rigid, my timings have to be correct and it really annoys me when people don't make the timings
Thanks Kati for the video. Very helpful to hear that group therapy and psychotherapy are effective as I always thought CBT was the main response. Someone I love suffers from this especially when he's under heavy stress, so I think it's also worth mentioning that someone may present with OCPD when they are under stress in their lives and at other times just drop back to being a perfectionist. I have also found the OCPD under stress requires a lot more space and control in his environment and relationships and so that is the time when the relationship suffers the most. But not under stress it drops back to a more tolerable level. So I think one key to being in relationship with an OCPD person is to identify those things that de-stress him and increase those de-stressing mechanisms in times of other life stresses (moving, death of family members, work issues etc. will be high stress for OCPD because their structure is taken away).
I sabotage my relationships by pushing ppl out of my life. I always felt guilty after the fact, bc I felt manipulative. I made others feel wrong just bc they didn’t do something how I wanted them to. What helps me is to focus on being more concerned with well being of PEOPLE than getting the right RESULTS. I’m a perfectionist, so if the result isn’t what I want - then ALL of it feels wrong. I want to throw it away, and then I throw people away too... I am coping by learning more about myself, why I feel this way, and keep my actions in check. I stopped blaming others. This is such a struggle, I feel so stressed when others do things differently than me... bc I feel like I could do it better with more structure and organization. I have to accept and move on...very, very difficult for me to do. I have serious control issues.
As someone who was misdiagnosed with OCD I found that the exposure therapy I did really helped with my ocpd to the point where I can almost completely manage it. Hope this helps x
You have cleared up so much confusion for me. Your videos are so easy to understand and informative. This video is life changing for me. I have hope now that i will be able to get through my bachelor of counselling once i reach out and get the right help. Thank you katie
This was extremely helpful because people always tell me I have OCD but I always thought it was more OCPD and this video has helped me validate my theory. :)
Thank you so much for discussing OCPD, Kati! I was just thinking about this the other day. Your making us feel "someone here understands" really helps lighten the burden :) Godbless!
I worked with guy with this problem, he got promoted and then demoted. He couldn't delegate, tried to do everything himself. He didn't trust anyone and everything was a conspiracy. I think he never got over his demotion.
I have all 8 symptoms. All of the situations described I've dealt with. Didn't think they were at all connected or relate at all, but when I think about it now, they give me the same feelings.
My ex husband has OCPD - it was a dark nightmare time in my life. I grew up with Narc. parents and one husband had narcissism. I'm not sure which was worse OCPd or Narcissism Both very controlling, inflexible and cruel......I have complex ptsd and now listening to this is triggering. Great to hear about this personality disorder which isn't well known.
I just wanted to thank you for all your videos and the time you take to go through everything in detail. Your videos have been extremely helpful for me. I have a long list of mental illnesses and your videos are very important and your very clear with everything and your down to earth. Keep up the great work on your videos. I wish you were my therapist but I do finally have a good therapist after many years of different therapists. Again Thank you for your videos and the time you put into them.
I just got diagnosed with OCPD. Thanks for offering this clear description! Especially the rigidity on morals and ethics is very recognizable in how I keep getting stuck in day to day decisions and why I got stuck in my studies. I can't seem to escape needing to do everything in light of the most ethical way. My biggest problem with this is; how do you navigate your life when the system that is supposed to be guiding you (your ethical compass) is broken?
This is really great! I did not know about OCPD. I am very rigid and inflexible, and hate working with others because they don't do things the way that I do. Almost everything about this sounds like me, including enjoying it and finding it comforting...
Your videos are great - easy to understand yet packed with relevant facts. The only problem I face watching your videos is that I need to keep my eyes closed and just listen to the audio part of it. Your beauty is too distractive!
Describes to 100% my co-worker. After 6-7 years I noticed all the traits in her, and in the end I find it very hard and stressful to work with her. At the first look you think they are over achievers and very accurate with their tasks.. took me some years to recognize that there is something quite off... OCPD describes perfectly all her behaviour patterns. Thank you!
My ex was diagnosed with this. But I believe he was also a sociopath and narcissist. They project it onto you as well. You have to have to be rigid and perfect, there’s no give. You have to be an exact way or they’ll unleash their wrath. It was the worst period in my life.
I was told once that I have this. Except for wanting things to be perfect; I disagree that I have this. Thank you for the video, that diagnosis always bothered me; and now I know it was wrong, it’s a relief. So, thank you again for the video.
My therapist was like “you have a routine and get upset when it changes you might have OCPD”.....after watching this I definitely do not. Thank you for this. Sometimes it’s about eliminating things to find what’s wrong.
@@turnovertheleaf5505 I've done a lot of research myself - the autism community isn't fond of high or low functioning labels, however in the DSM 5 there are 3 levels that distinguish how much support is needed for each individual.
@@turnovertheleaf5505I think it's for those that do not get put into the grouping of being "high functioning" that could lose self esteem in that sense.
I don't have OCPD but I do relate to quite a lot of these symptoms. I've constantly struggled with my impossibly high standards for as long as I've remembered. I've also noticed how anxious and guilty I get when I spend money on anything or when other people spend money on me and how I'm really reluctant to throw worthless things away.
Great video. Out of all the PD diagnoses, however, I think this is the one I am most suspicious of. Not to say that it never exists, but that these kinds of symptoms are more likely to be attributable to an Autistic Spectrum Condition and/or to Workaholism, and while the latter is not in the DSM, I contend that it is a very valid and useful diagnosis for a specific form of addiction.
Thank You So Very Much, This Has Helped A Lot. Your Breakdown Of OCPD Has Helped Me Understand Why I Was Diagnosed With This Disorder. Thank You. Other Video's Don't Break It Down Like You Did.
I never knew I had this , for all my life I thought it was just who I was as a person. I managed to change over the past few years and improve though, so it`s possible!
OCPD is a really true killer. I've been suffering from it these later years, and although I know it doesn't have an absolute cure and it follows the person, I'm happy with the fact that I came across your video because it feels like someone is really understanding you. And I appreciate the fact that you told "they are human" this is really motivating!! I cried my eyes out, but thank you for this.. ❤
My way of doing things isn't apparent because it involves avoiding having people who I've learnt clearly don't agree with my previous ways of doing things tell me what to do. It is such a relief to talk to someone who has a similar experience and have done recently and it's weird because usually what I express is only a half story that's bred out of obsessive thoughts about myself being dysfunctional in some way or someone else being manipulative and 'overly' controlling of me, even just in the way they've asked me to do something, as if they don't have to and wish they could just tell me what I should do and hold my hands and make me do it that way, just the little look in their face, the entitled smirk, the ownership... etc, which is probably just my misperception and projection of my controlling attitude towards everything. My feelings are just messy objects to be controlled.
I’m glad there’s a video about this. OCPD is not really as known as OCD. Scored 5/8, I have late anxiety so things have to be on time. Also, I have both. Is fun 🙃. Also, not a hoarder. I only hold onto things if they have some sentimental value. People hate me sometimes because I can’t help but tell them what to do at this point. Going through therapy currently.
I never heard of OCPD before a few months ago, when I went to counselling with Postnatal Depression. I have to say my daughter is nearly 4 and my relationship nearly broke down when I realised I needed help. It is scary to know that it part of my personality, so it won`t change (much) but at the same time it gives me a sense of relief that I know why I am the way I am. My biggest struggle is perfectionism and orderliness, which is quite frankly exhausting. There`s a lot of anger, frustration, anxiety and guilt to deal with on an every day basis. One of my lowest point was when I didn`t let my partner to cook because he didn`t cut the different veggie according to their different shapes. Oh and don`t even get me started on folding towels :) Anther prime moment when he parked the car - in an empty car park - in the 4th space from the curb. I went off my head because in my head the 3rd one was the perfect one, which is also weird because everything has to be even and symmetrical i.e numbers, volume, air-conditioning temperature. Basically everything that I can control has to be my way. Everything is black and white, yes or no, right or wrong. Absolutely no in the middle.
This video makes me think I might have OCPD... I definitely have a lot of these tendencies and almost each bullet point I was like oh my gosh that's me. I definitely don't think I'm OCD but so many people tell me I act like it... But I think OCPD gets called OCD too often. I'm definitely going to have to look into this more and ask a professional to properly diagnose me.
My psychiatrist and I have talked about OCPD as I meet most of these symptoms. My inability to perfect projects make me lose interest in them because I can't make them exactly how I want. I recognize I have OCPD, but I don't think it's a bad thing. Mostly, I seek out information to help others understand why I think the way I do. I have to have people understand my motivations, just like they expect me to accept theirs.
That was me, 8/8, just a few years ago, and it drove me to severe depression. And today, only one of those features left to combat! All of the thoughts are still there, of course, but I'm able to ignore them or just concentrate on what's more fun or pleasant. I look at my (according to my standards) untidy apartment and decide to watch youtube videos instead of cleaning, without feeling anxious about it. Yey! You will get there too and it will make your life so much more relaxed and you a nicer person to others. 😊
Hello Elina. Congratulations on your hard work and wanting to make a change in your life! Could you please share with us what did you do to change your perfectionism and a need to delegate work to others?
@@joannab9854 Hi! I'm so sorry I only noticed your comment a year later 😞 Anyway, if you're still there, I think there were two main things: first, getting so ill that I could no longer maintain my standards at all, and secondly, starting to travel. Especially backpacking in South America where nothing followed schedules and planning was total waste of time made me realise that all life events were more pleasant with less expectations and things could be done in more than one way and still work. Later, after realising I had ocpd, it really helped me to see all my inner "demons" listed and deciding every day to "cheat" and not follow my own demands. Get rid of lots of stuff even though I knew I might need some of them one day. Leave my stuff unorganised when I left home and discover that the world did not come to an end because of it. Little steps and brought more pleasure and less anxiety the more I took them. I don't know if this was helpful at all, but I tryly hope you will find your way to an easier and more pleasure filled life too. My warmest wishes to you!
I have 6 out of the 8 personality traits. I agree with you that group therapy and sharing experiences can make a person realise the mental anguish it can cause loved ones. I don’t have severe OCPD, but it does cause some of my loved ones that live with me, mental stress. Especially my need to control and have order in my home and even in public (in my own country).
One thing I related to the first symptom (orderliness to where we forget the reasoning) with is my work in genealogy. I've always felt like I'm obsessed with it and that I don't have a normal interest in it, as in I just like filling in dates and photos more than actually learning about my ancestors as my family and not names, dates and photos in my head.
Kati, I would like to see a video on the differences between OCP, OCD, and OCPD. I was recently diagnosed with OCP which tends to get confused with OCPD.
Two questions: 1) Is a person w/OCPD necessarily an orderly person? That is, will a person w/OCPD always have a clean and organized room, car, workplace, etc.? 2) I was screened for ADHD in 2014, but the discussion section says that I "meet the criteria for OCPD." What does that mean? Does it mean I have OCPD? Does it mean I have been officially diagnosed w/it?
I worked for someone who has OCPD. At first I thought he was a micromanager, but as time passed I realised it was far more serious. He would be tied up with customers, the phone would ring, he would attempt to take it off me whilst still talking to his original customer. However he first learned to process a sale in 1985, he’s still rigidly using the same routines now. Never open to discussion, on how to improve his dreadfully embarrassing SOP’s. I understand everything you have raised, but the impact on my sanity was stretched to its limits. I have empathy by the bucket load, but I will openly admit that having left this job, I know he’s struggling. and I have zero sympathy.
YES! I work with a guy that became manager, and is a perfect jackwagon, and abusive about it. He destroyed an entire team by obsessively micromanaging EVERYTHING into a complete halt. He's one person that thinks he is doing 12 jobs, but in reality he took 12 people and forced them to help him do ONE job. And he never improves from day one, he gets worse, because the people that didn't quit simply stopped trying to do anything because he was so controlling and verbally abusive that is was healthier to stop trying. I wish I never would have met the guy. So self-righteous, too. Can't see how screwed up everything is now.
I've lived with someone with OCPD for almost 2 decades and it has been hell. I thought something was wrong in the beginning but didn't figure out what it was until a few years ago. you have to remember, the person with OCPD may think that their way of doing things is right or perfect but it's their perception of right or perfect so doing anything other than what they think is right or perfect is wrong. The person might insist that the kitchen be tidied up a certain way, that the dishes be packed in the dishwasher a certain way, that the food be placed in the cupboards in a certain way and if its not done the way they think it should be done in their mind they throw a tantrum. They might not give 2 cents that the kitchen floor might be dirty or that the bathroom might be filthy. Each person with this disorder has their own idea of perfection, right and wrong, lists of dos and don'ts and for people who have to live with this it's hell. You might be given a list of things to do (and usually to be completed within an impossible timeframe) and if you don't finish one thing on the list there's hell to pay. There's screaming that everything wasn't done on the list and that they were such simple tasks. Yet he starts to fix one thing or start on a project and it takes months or years or most times never gets finished. This disorder is not a good thing. Its not enjoyable for the people who have to live with someone who has this disorder - it's a disorder! Because the person with OCPD can't stand to be wrong they will even look at the disorder and think it's a good thing. I feel sorry for anyone who has it or anyone living with someone that has it.
I highly highly go down to your quote “it is their own right and perception of correct”... been struggling this for 31yrs with a family in the same house, a mental torture that sometimes im scared of myself in becoming a murderer to the person, because when the tantrum shows up, it really changes your perception of positivity in life
I was diagnosed with depression this year. My psychiatrist thinks I've had depression from a young age.. because of my childhood and how much was expected of me. I was always considered a failure to my parents mainly my dad and they had the same routine every day eventually I got into a routine every day as well. I did the exact same thing as the day before I would always count my steps making sure I took the exact same way home from school it was a sense of security for me I felt comfortable and safe in my routine because I knew exactly what would happen next because I had a specific routine everyday.
So glad you clarified. I always called myself OCD, but now realize the diagnosis would be OCPD. So, question, can I be OCPD and ADHD? I just recently took a few online tests that I scored high on, 20 out of 24 for ADHD. I have only been diagnosed with depression and anxiety.
So do you think OCPD is borne of anxiety? Like, it soothes one's anxieties to feel like they are controlling things? My brother has severe anxiety, and a few of these things are very strongly "him" but not the orderliness, more a deep need to feel control over situations. This was a really interesting video, I'm glad that I watched it, even though I don't personally deal with this.
The therapists at the clinic I'm doing an internship at mentioned that often patients who don't have control over certain things and are terrified by that (for example we have a patient who suffers from epileptic seizures) tend to develop anancasms. But I honestly don't know whether it's more like OCD or OCPD. I myself was told I had anancasms once when I did a psychometric test and I don't really see myself as OCD because I don't have terrifying obessions while the description of OCPD seems very familiar to me. To me it seems like OCD is more anxiety based than OCPD
I once told someone I was in a relationship with, "I will never be happy unless I was rich and famous" and she said "wow I don't make you happy" Which she did. She really did! My heart was hers... but it's like a NEED for an opulent lifestyle. I NEED the luxuries in life. Nothing ever feels like a "WANT" everything seems flawed when it doesn't meet your standards.
My boyfriend ticks all the boxes. After a while living with him and suffering quite a lot. I decided I was going to find out why he was acting so strange. Finally, i hit on OCPD. I gave him some literature about OCPD, mental and emotional abuse, and ASD ( because I have ASD) he read it and after getting a bit more educated on how all those things interacting in our relationship can cause this or that problem, well he has really shown a desire to change behaviors that were harmful or hurtful to our relationship or to me. It is still quite difficult and we try to take it day by day. I am glad he had a will to try to do better and admit, even of only a little bit, that he needed to work on some things.
wish i could share and write about my life with OCPD here. but in order to explain it and express myself, i will waste at least 3 hours (as usual) typing and deleting over and over, again just to make sure i wrote it in the proper way so it will be perfect. (took me 15 minutes to write these lines).
When you mentioned the money thing, I literally said "ohhhh fuuuuck" out loud because I've had an extreme obsession with hoarding or not spending a certain amount of money in fear of needing it. That includes the idea of spending money on therapy (which I know I need) and pushing it off more and more. I also have a weird obsession with always making sure to have a certain amount saved and if I go under, I'm obsessing about the next paycheck to put it back in that "safe zone" to feel okay.
The way I best describe OCPD is that I am a slave to myself. I relate so much with every point: I take little to no enjoyment in the process of completing my tasks (and only get minor temporary relief when completed), get lost in the details of a project or terrified of doing something because I'm scared of making mistakes, and am OBSESSED with to-do lists and productivity. The overscrupulosity appears more in my rigid adherence to goals and frustrating inability to spend money on "unnecessary" things. I don't collect things though - I'm the exact opposite: constantly purging, cleaning, and feeling anxious about owning items. My ability to work with others and compromise has significantly improved.
Same, to relieve anxiety I re-write my to do list over and over but I can't get anything done. Then the unfinished tasks and to-do's are always in the back of my mind causing anxiety and worthless feeling of not being productive.
I constantly discard items (to relieve guilt of spending on things I do not use or plan to use and I like my soroundings neat) then I hoard my money and I can't seem to spend it (walking around in worn out clothing f.e.), it is taking away from my mental space and quality of life. I discovered OCPD because I was researching how to spend money and overcome compulsive saving, thinking I was a frugal minimalist. (it started out as me wanting to save, but spending has become immensely uncomfortable, now I am thinking about forcing myself to do the things my anxious thought's do not allow). Can one cure himself trough forcing behaviors?
I do most of these things except the lists. I try to make lists, but I get so obsessed that my list may be missing something that I was supposed to do, or I get so obsessed with getting everything on the list done that I become avoidant or feel like a failure if I can’t do it all or have to change the list bc something comes up.
It’s like I can’t be normal and see it as a guide or just cross something off if I don’t need to do it anymore or if something comes up. I’m a slave to it, I over rely on it, and am afraid of it.
Everything you just said is exactly how I feel. I was diagnosed a week ago today. I have a lot more clarity and a problem that I can be proactive about.
I agree with everything you've said; but what really hit me was the constant purging, cleaning, etc. My husband and I call it "elimination" and it's an every day issue. I will use certain soap dispensers over others because one is almost out of soap so I can throw that package away...I mean COME ON!
Wow never related to something more
Finnaly, oh finally something I can identify with! I've searched YEARS for the answer and must admit, I'm a bit angry that not a single one of my psychiatrists or psychologists ever told me about this personality disorder. I literally listed them all of these symptoms!
Dude, same. I've even told mine I think I have a personality disorder. I think they've got the idea that clients will bolt out the door when they tell the client they probably have a personality disorder that needs to be worked on. It's made clinicians fearful and gun-shy of giving diagnoses. They don't want to be the one who scared someone away who obviously needs a lot of help.
Same
Same, finally I discovered that my father has this disorder. No psychiatrists ever told this.
I feel like they misdiagnose too often:/ Ugh
Potjehova Rakijo, maybe they had the same symptoms and they were convinced that that was healthy way of living. 😃
I don't think I've really told you how much I appreciate you doing these videos for us, and for that I am sorry. I really do appreciate you and all your hard work to educate us on mental health!
NotDeadJustYet You Guys should watch OCPD My Life in Debris. Daryl has OCPD and has some amazing videos.
I score 8/8 (Perfection :).
OCPD is very difficult to identify mainly for a few reasons.
1/ Perfection in perceived differently by everybody.
2/The persons natural ability will dictate the level of perfection that can be achieved by the individual and observed by others.
3/If a OCPD sufferer is naturally good at something this can just look like they are a high achiever to others.
4/If a OCPD sufferer is bad at something they simply will avoid it so nobody will possible know.
5/If a OCPD sufferer is forced to do something that they are not good at and suffer major anxiety, they are offered sympathy by others (people are nice about it). Which makes them believe they did it perfectly so after they will get a big rush. But after self analysing they truly know they did bad and will become depressed. (i know trust me).
6/OCPD IS PERSONAL TO THAT PERSON NO OTHER PERSON CAN HAVE THE SAME IDEAS OF PERFECTION!
So basically you can only help yourself by realising how OCPD effects you and others because of your behaviour and naturally because you are a perfectionist you will achieve your goal! :)
thank you so much for saying this, whenever I tell people I have OCPD they always say "But your so messy and unorganized how can you have that" but in my head everything is perfect and exactly where I want it. Like whenever people mess with my stuff like touch my clothes or move something it legit can cause an anxiety attack because it just doesn't "feel right" in my head
Agreed, though it is still a personality disorder needing to be gradually dealt with, focusing only on the positive perceptions is also a coping mechanism. This is why changing perception is tough (and having a professional guide helps), people must maintain functionality, how one implements it is the key. The misconception by the individual is that if positive coping strategies are removed the functionality will cease; when in fact, the strategies are masking dysfunction.
There is an overlap between OCPD and autism, having both, I used to find it hard to understand why everyone else didn’t think like me. Videos like this help me to see other perspectives. Thank you for the videos.
Also with Narcissism
I've been treated with MDD for years.I could not improve much and yesterday my psychiatrist then diagnosed me with OCPD,and i think i have autism as well,but i cannot be too sure now that the symptoms are overlapping too much.I am starting my psychotherapy tomorrow and think will get clearer from that.
Ocpd has been ruining my life for about 15 years now. Has ruined relationships. Has made me be one of the best at work. Has made life miserable in general.
Nick Chungo I was like this before as well. It’s mostly common and a pandemic in Japanese , Germans and Persians
Nick Chungo dame her Nick. I am sorry to hear this for you.
..
I feel that, too. Don’t let it ruin you. Try to accept yourself and others... it’s okay they are different. You have your own gifts and talents.
I am a high achiever and feel like none of my coworkers can work at the same level. It frustrates me a lot. But I know they can get work done well their own way, at their own pace.
You are honest as well.
I think theres also an anxiety and a crippling indecisiveness that comes with OCPD. And like you said it stems from a fear of not being prepared or losing something important and in the moment it feels satisfying to have things a certain way but in the long run the inability to get rid of the stupidest things of sentimental value ends up becoming an emotional and physical burden in your life. It becomes very exhausting when you’re trying to move from one place to another. Thanks for the video!
I have OCPD and major depression (both diagnosed by my psychiatrist) so imagine how AWFUL it is. I'm a perfectionist when I can't even get anything done. So here where comes the feeling of guilt and worthlessness. It feels like the end of the world when I didn't finish everything on my to-do list. Even if it's as simple as "refill the water bottle". Like i know it is supposed to be okay if I couldn't do it today and had to do it tomorrow, i still can't take it. I feel worthless if I didn't do this simple task even if i finished 1000 difficult tasks. I have no control over it. But I'm trying with my psychiatrist to get over it.
+Amna Ameen I feel the same way.
+Skylar Clark CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) helped a bit. Consider it.
I already doing it.
*Do it
Amna Ameen How are you doing now since you posted your comment 9 months ago? I am diagnosed with OCPD but never went to psychiatrist
I just diagnosed with OCPD and it felt great to know yourself more, I was struggling with my relationship especially with my boyfriend because I wanted from him to treat me in a perfect way “in my definition of perfect”, I know now that it was my mind, my way of thinking. Now I have the desire to change in a better way, I want to reach that gray mind-set not a black and white mind-set. Pray for me.
I love this video so much. As a mum with ocpd I am terrified of how it's affecting my daughter and my relationship with my fiance and this is the first time I've heard someone talk about it without judgement or condemnation. I don't want to make people miserable but my brain cries when things are not right. It's hard to find that balance
Not like I needed another "confirmation" but yep, pretty spot on. One thing to add, Id say it's less "comfort" than avoiding "discomfort" while those things still feel like chores. (sometimes) Everything feels like a chore to me..
Add anxiety and depression onto that and your world is in a state of chaos most of the time.
Sincere thanks for taking the time to make this helpful video. My mother displays most of these traits; she seeks "leisure" activities that involve planning and organizational rules (event planning and meetings). This personality disorder has a high incidence of behavioral transmission within a family; I see where my behavior has been reinforced toward OCPD strategies. Driving my mother to appointments involves her yelling at me; she narrates her every thought, and has endless expectations about each part of the route. I notice how overwhelmingly frustrated she gets whenever anything occurs spontaneously, often these occurances work out for the better -- but, she refuses to acknowledge it and rages for days. There are myriad "disruptions" to her daily tasks. Observing this, I often think it must be a nightmare in her head and how I should have more compassion for her. On my end, it feels like walking a tightrope over aligators. The rules change and become more complex, and the yelling is unsettling.
Thank you for believing that we can change. I've learned that I have this for over a year now, and all of ocpd is not a curse but I don't want my perfectionism to ruin my parenting ability, don't want it to hurt my relationships with friends and family, I want to change. I want to believe that it's possible for me to change.
I appreciate you making the distinction with OCD and the ego part. Very big in knowing how it makes someone feel internally.
I've never heard of this disorder before, but it explains my life so perfectly. Thanks for the help!
Oh hey that sounds like me! Like all of it. Except that I usually can get rid of things that are worn down or worthless, sometimes it just takes a little while for me to convince myself I really won't need it again.
+Homemaking Madeline same
I also have OCPS but I like to get rid of stuff I don't need. It leads to order
Tuco Salamanca that's me too
Me too...everything in it's place.
THANK YOU! I was diagnosed with OCPD in 2019, and it honestly rules my life. I need order in my life; I feel an intense need for rigidity and am relatively inflexible if things do not go to the plan that I have in my mind. I have obsession with rules - laws, legislation, rules in general - to the point of regularly pointing out the behaviour and actions of those around me, and often focussing on things such as the dangerous driving of other drivers to the point of anxiety attacks, feeling genuinely fearful, at my worse, that a friend or family member will cause me injury due to behaviour such as speeding, say even 5kms above, or accidentally running an amber light. I would only too often complete assessments with 500 - 1000 word over word count because I was preoccupied with explaining repeatedly in different manners, I wanted to ensure that my argument was perfect in my mind. I would work myself into crippling anxiety attacks in which I would vomit, suffer diarrhoea, punch walls, kick walls; sadly to this day, these behaviours are crippling at times of severe anxiety. Given my dual diagnosis, it's little wonder that I am only too often ruled by perfection and the inability to recognise and take pride in my successes and achievements but I wind-up feeling worthless and useless because I have the compulsive desire to compare and value others as "better" than myself.
I really enjoyed this video thanks for posting.
I have noticed there are two distinct types of OCPD even though both types do share most traits overall.
The two distinct types are one is a hoarder type who has difficulty throwing things away, and the other is the clean freak who compulsively cleans or tidies their surroundings yet who probably doesn’t have the same desire to compulsively shop or obtain as much stuff as the hoarder type and the cleaner type can also throw stuff away without as much of an issue about it.
Both types that I have encountered have their own rigid schedules, habits and beliefs though. Be it political, lifestyle or spiritual they are both inflexible on whatever their beliefs are.
I’ve also noticed the comorbidity of frequent occurrence of having both OCD and OCPD.
oh look it's my father
My father too! Now i feel less crazy knowing why i felt so crazy growing up!
Sounds like someone I know ( or do I know them ? do they know themselves ??!!)
Luke
Me, my father, and his father.
@@flyguyry1 SHUT THE DOOR, MOE OUT THE WAY, WHY YOU ALWAYS LATE, CLOSE THE CUPBOARD, HELP ME WITH THIS, THE GRASS ISN'T PERFECTLY CUT.
He doesn't have a severe case but he still has it. Swear at one point I thought he was putting it on/being an edgelord because it was a "cool" thing to do, but no it's real. They act that dependents to their bosses but sociopaths to everyone else.
I love this. Thank you for making these videos Kati, they're really helpful in trying to get my friends/family to understand me better. I think it's important that people recognise that OCPD isn't the same as OCD.
Oh wow Kati,you've hit Mr right in the feels there.I've always been super ridged with my life and way I do things,and not being able to do certain things and people have often teased me and said I'm way over the top and must have ocd,and I've always explained that OCD is an obsessive need to count and have things done in certain numbers or patterns (in a nutshell anyway)
but I never knew that OCPD was a thing ,and this video has really struck a chord with me as I identified with 6 out of 8 of those symptoms,so perhaps I should consult my doctor ,thank you for making me aware of this Kati 💖
I was recently diagnosed with this and videos like these really give me insight into my ways and i feel i finally understand how my mind works as opposed to other people. I'm still figuring out how to deal with this with my psychiatrist but i feel with time i can learn to live with it.
I do have a question however: I sometimes feel like i can't let things go, is that a part of OCPD? for instance, i'll lay in my bed and i can't sleep because of something embarrassing that happend 10 years ago. I have this problem quite often.
+MrThedorkknight I think that's a symptom of PTSD. It doesn't mean you have that though.
This happens to me. I can't let go of things and I also feel a lot of self-guilt
Crysta Diaz that sounds more like depression
you can totally live with it. Its not like a disease or something
I deal with this too but I also suffer with anxiety so I live in a bit of a spiral between the two. I don't have advice I'm afraid
I always thought I had a mild form of ocd. I've had trichotillomania since I was about 11 years old, and started having number related compulsions around the same time. However, much of my adult life I have felt burdened by my inability to waver on how I get things done. Recently it's been affecting my relationship with my roommates because I don't feel like they are "cleaning the right way." This was a very interesting video and I'm so glad to be introduced to this personality disorder. Definitely going to be seeking more help about dealing with it soon. Thanks for the great video and information!!
This exactly describes me.. especially lately. I am sacrificing friendships, pleasantness, peace, basically my life for a never-ending never gratifying checklist.. it's Soo exhausting..
This description is right on. It is difficult to be in a relationship with someone with OCPD.
Rich B why is that?
@@staybalancedn They're exacting and demanding. The fearfulness with which they live their lives drives them to control everything they think they can to try to prevent certain problems, real or imagined.
Thank you! This was spot on! I wish I'd been able to understand this long ago. I worked myself sick (literally) cleaning my house and making sure it was 1,000% visitor ready at all times. But when company came over, I'd resent any 'mess' created and often said "not having them over again".. now I have Lupus. Unable to do much. lesson learned.
I had a father like this, at least before his last stroke. The stroke changed his character significantly. Best way to describe living like this is a "concentration camp", rules applied to everybody in the family except to himself. It took me 33 years of headbutting with him before he admitted I made a man of myself he could never for himself. I achieved this by creativity, bold action, open-mindedness, risk-taking, practicality, try and fail methods...everything he condemned full-heartedly :)
I recently got diagnosed with OCPD, I have 3 whiteboards with lists on doing from films and books I've watched/read, people I've met, events I've been to and up coming events, I have been doing up to 14.5hr work days helping others with their work as well doing my own, I'm always overconscientous and inflexible, I would rather be massively stressed but do all the work myself than delegate tasks to others unless they do it my way but even then I have to check their work over before accepting it and I always get told I'm stubborn and rigid, my timings have to be correct and it really annoys me when people don't make the timings
What is your treatment?
Thanks Kati for the video. Very helpful to hear that group therapy and psychotherapy are effective as I always thought CBT was the main response. Someone I love suffers from this especially when he's under heavy stress, so I think it's also worth mentioning that someone may present with OCPD when they are under stress in their lives and at other times just drop back to being a perfectionist. I have also found the OCPD under stress requires a lot more space and control in his environment and relationships and so that is the time when the relationship suffers the most. But not under stress it drops back to a more tolerable level. So I think one key to being in relationship with an OCPD person is to identify those things that de-stress him and increase those de-stressing mechanisms in times of other life stresses (moving, death of family members, work issues etc. will be high stress for OCPD because their structure is taken away).
I sabotage my relationships by pushing ppl out of my life. I always felt guilty after the fact, bc I felt manipulative. I made others feel wrong just bc they didn’t do something how I wanted them to. What helps me is to focus on being more concerned with well being of PEOPLE than getting the right RESULTS. I’m a perfectionist, so if the result isn’t what I want - then ALL of it feels wrong. I want to throw it away, and then I throw people away too...
I am coping by learning more about myself, why I feel this way, and keep my actions in check. I stopped blaming others. This is such a struggle, I feel so stressed when others do things differently than me... bc I feel like I could do it better with more structure and organization. I have to accept and move on...very, very difficult for me to do. I have serious control issues.
As someone who was misdiagnosed with OCD I found that the exposure therapy I did really helped with my ocpd to the point where I can almost completely manage it. Hope this helps x
You have cleared up so much confusion for me. Your videos are so easy to understand and informative. This video is life changing for me. I have hope now that i will be able to get through my bachelor of counselling once i reach out and get the right help. Thank you katie
I've just realised that I don't have OCPD. Thank you. :)
Why did you think you had it
Anthony Kist I think it was a joke
You Guys should watch OCPD My Life in Debris. Daryl has OCPD and has some amazing videos.
Congrats🎉
This was a great video. I always thought I had ocd (undiagnosed) but after watching this video realised it was actually ocpd
This was extremely helpful because people always tell me I have OCD but I always thought it was more OCPD and this video has helped me validate my theory. :)
I really like how your hair is styled in this video
Thank you so much for discussing OCPD, Kati! I was just thinking about this the other day. Your making us feel "someone here understands" really helps lighten the burden :) Godbless!
I worked with guy with this problem, he got promoted and then demoted. He couldn't delegate, tried to do everything himself. He didn't trust anyone and everything was a conspiracy. I think he never got over his demotion.
I have all 8 symptoms. All of the situations described I've dealt with. Didn't think they were at all connected or relate at all, but when I think about it now, they give me the same feelings.
My ex husband has OCPD - it was a dark nightmare time in my life. I grew up with Narc. parents and one husband had narcissism. I'm not sure which was worse OCPd or Narcissism Both very controlling, inflexible and cruel......I have complex ptsd and now listening to this is triggering. Great to hear about this personality disorder which isn't well known.
I just wanted to thank you for all your videos and the time you take to go through everything in detail. Your videos have been extremely helpful for me. I have a long list of mental illnesses and your videos are very important and your very clear with everything and your down to earth. Keep up the great work on your videos. I wish you were my therapist but I do finally have a good therapist after many years of different therapists. Again Thank you for your videos and the time you put into them.
I just got diagnosed with OCPD. Thanks for offering this clear description! Especially the rigidity on morals and ethics is very recognizable in how I keep getting stuck in day to day decisions and why I got stuck in my studies. I can't seem to escape needing to do everything in light of the most ethical way. My biggest problem with this is; how do you navigate your life when the system that is supposed to be guiding you (your ethical compass) is broken?
This is really great! I did not know about OCPD. I am very rigid and inflexible, and hate working with others because they don't do things the way that I do. Almost everything about this sounds like me, including enjoying it and finding it comforting...
i have a test in abnormal psychology and im binging all of your videos!
Your videos are great - easy to understand yet packed with relevant facts.
The only problem I face watching your videos is that I need to keep my eyes closed and just listen to the audio part of it. Your beauty is too distractive!
I like your blouse, Kati. Looks very nice on you.
I LOVE YOUR SHIRT! ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Said simplistically, I think it's about control of one's environment and feeling safe within it.
Thank you Kati. 🥰 Wish there was a zoom group for OCPD.
Oh my goodness!! This is me 100%. Thanks so much for your videos...they are very informative!
I am 14 and have been diagnosed OCPD a couple years ago. Not too bad. You grt stuff done and your things are neat.
Describes to 100% my co-worker. After 6-7 years I noticed all the traits in her, and in the end I find it very hard and stressful to work with her. At the first look you think they are over achievers and very accurate with their tasks.. took me some years to recognize that there is something quite off... OCPD describes perfectly all her behaviour patterns. Thank you!
OMG! when you talked about the symptoms, it felt like you were describing me........so now I understand, thank you!
My ex was diagnosed with this. But I believe he was also a sociopath and narcissist. They project it onto you as well. You have to have to be rigid and perfect, there’s no give. You have to be an exact way or they’ll unleash their wrath.
It was the worst period in my life.
But can you have both?
It goes hand in hand with perfectionism.
I was told once that I have this. Except for wanting things to be perfect; I disagree that I have this. Thank you for the video, that diagnosis always bothered me; and now I know it was wrong, it’s a relief. So, thank you again for the video.
My therapist was like “you have a routine and get upset when it changes you might have OCPD”.....after watching this I definitely do not. Thank you for this. Sometimes it’s about eliminating things to find what’s wrong.
If not ocpd, it might be autism. Maybe it is highly functioning (aspengers)
@@turnovertheleaf5505 I've done a lot of research myself - the autism community isn't fond of high or low functioning labels, however in the DSM 5 there are 3 levels that distinguish how much support is needed for each individual.
Ok... everyone is offended about everything nowadays. "High functioning " is an insult now? Ok
@@turnovertheleaf5505I think it's for those that do not get put into the grouping of being "high functioning" that could lose self esteem in that sense.
I don't have OCPD but I do relate to quite a lot of these symptoms. I've constantly struggled with my impossibly high standards for as long as I've remembered. I've also noticed how anxious and guilty I get when I spend money on anything or when other people spend money on me and how I'm really reluctant to throw worthless things away.
Fascinating; especially the hoarding tendencies. "Aviator" nailed OCD. Never knew about the differences between OCPD and OCD.
Great video. Out of all the PD diagnoses, however, I think this is the one I am most suspicious of. Not to say that it never exists, but that these kinds of symptoms are more likely to be attributable to an Autistic Spectrum Condition and/or to Workaholism, and while the latter is not in the DSM, I contend that it is a very valid and useful diagnosis for a specific form of addiction.
I swear every new video you make fits me sooooo well
Thank You So Very Much, This Has Helped A Lot. Your Breakdown Of OCPD Has Helped Me Understand Why I Was Diagnosed With This Disorder. Thank You. Other Video's Don't Break It Down Like You Did.
I never knew I had this , for all my life I thought it was just who I was as a person.
I managed to change over the past few years and improve though, so it`s possible!
Madalina C. Via what method of change?
OCPD is a really true killer. I've been suffering from it these later years, and although I know it doesn't have an absolute cure and it follows the person, I'm happy with the fact that I came across your video because it feels like someone is really understanding you. And I appreciate the fact that you told "they are human" this is really motivating!! I cried my eyes out, but thank you for this.. ❤
Hanane El Jastimi El Mansouri i love you, get well !
I can totally relate to most of these symptoms.
My way of doing things isn't apparent because it involves avoiding having people who I've learnt clearly don't agree with my previous ways of doing things tell me what to do.
It is such a relief to talk to someone who has a similar experience and have done recently and it's weird because usually what I express is only a half story that's bred out of obsessive thoughts about myself being dysfunctional in some way or someone else being manipulative and 'overly' controlling of me, even just in the way they've asked me to do something, as if they don't have to and wish they could just tell me what I should do and hold my hands and make me do it that way, just the little look in their face, the entitled smirk, the ownership... etc, which is probably just my misperception and projection of my controlling attitude towards everything. My feelings are just messy objects to be controlled.
Thank for talking about this ! I have this disorder . It can be frustrating . I really appreciate you ! Happy Valentines Day
I was diagnosed yesterday and now i understand thank you
As someone who cares for one who is riddled with this and MDD, IM SORRY YALL. BIG HUGS
This is an amazing video. I have learned so much from it, especially the difference between this and OCD
I’m glad there’s a video about this. OCPD is not really as known as OCD. Scored 5/8, I have late anxiety so things have to be on time.
Also, I have both. Is fun 🙃.
Also, not a hoarder. I only hold onto things if they have some sentimental value. People hate me sometimes because I can’t help but tell them what to do at this point.
Going through therapy currently.
I never heard of OCPD before a few months ago, when I went to counselling with Postnatal Depression. I have to say my daughter is nearly 4 and my relationship nearly broke down when I realised I needed help. It is scary to know that it part of my personality, so it won`t change (much) but at the same time it gives me a sense of relief that I know why I am the way I am. My biggest struggle is perfectionism and orderliness, which is quite frankly exhausting. There`s a lot of anger, frustration, anxiety and guilt to deal with on an every day basis. One of my lowest point was when I didn`t let my partner to cook because he didn`t cut the different veggie according to their different shapes. Oh and don`t even get me started on folding towels :) Anther prime moment when he parked the car - in an empty car park - in the 4th space from the curb. I went off my head because in my head the 3rd one was the perfect one, which is also weird because everything has to be even and symmetrical i.e numbers, volume, air-conditioning temperature. Basically everything that I can control has to be my way. Everything is black and white, yes or no, right or wrong. Absolutely no in the middle.
Very interesting video. I saved it on my hard drive...the irony of which is not lost on me.
Oh I've been waiting for this for sooo long.
This video makes me think I might have OCPD... I definitely have a lot of these tendencies and almost each bullet point I was like oh my gosh that's me. I definitely don't think I'm OCD but so many people tell me I act like it... But I think OCPD gets called OCD too often. I'm definitely going to have to look into this more and ask a professional to properly diagnose me.
Wow...5 out of the 8. This fits me so much more than OCD. I have a compulsive spending habit though. Add my AvPD and that sums me up completely.
thank you very much
My psychiatrist and I have talked about OCPD as I meet most of these symptoms. My inability to perfect projects make me lose interest in them because I can't make them exactly how I want. I recognize I have OCPD, but I don't think it's a bad thing. Mostly, I seek out information to help others understand why I think the way I do. I have to have people understand my motivations, just like they expect me to accept theirs.
Its a bad thing for others, not you. When they interact with u.
Thanks for making these videos, they are very helpful
That was me, 8/8, just a few years ago, and it drove me to severe depression. And today, only one of those features left to combat! All of the thoughts are still there, of course, but I'm able to ignore them or just concentrate on what's more fun or pleasant. I look at my (according to my standards) untidy apartment and decide to watch youtube videos instead of cleaning, without feeling anxious about it. Yey! You will get there too and it will make your life so much more relaxed and you a nicer person to others. 😊
Hello Elina. Congratulations on your hard work and wanting to make a change in your life! Could you please share with us what did you do to change your perfectionism and a need to delegate work to others?
@@joannab9854 Hi! I'm so sorry I only noticed your comment a year later 😞 Anyway, if you're still there, I think there were two main things: first, getting so ill that I could no longer maintain my standards at all, and secondly, starting to travel. Especially backpacking in South America where nothing followed schedules and planning was total waste of time made me realise that all life events were more pleasant with less expectations and things could be done in more than one way and still work.
Later, after realising I had ocpd, it really helped me to see all my inner "demons" listed and deciding every day to "cheat" and not follow my own demands. Get rid of lots of stuff even though I knew I might need some of them one day. Leave my stuff unorganised when I left home and discover that the world did not come to an end because of it. Little steps and brought more pleasure and less anxiety the more I took them.
I don't know if this was helpful at all, but I tryly hope you will find your way to an easier and more pleasure filled life too. My warmest wishes to you!
I have 6 out of the 8 personality traits. I agree with you that group therapy and sharing experiences can make a person realise the mental anguish it can cause loved ones. I don’t have severe OCPD, but it does cause some of my loved ones that live with me, mental stress. Especially my need to control and have order in my home and even in public (in my own country).
One thing I related to the first symptom (orderliness to where we forget the reasoning) with is my work in genealogy. I've always felt like I'm obsessed with it and that I don't have a normal interest in it, as in I just like filling in dates and photos more than actually learning about my ancestors as my family and not names, dates and photos in my head.
Kati, I would like to see a video on the differences between OCP, OCD, and OCPD. I was recently diagnosed with OCP which tends to get confused with OCPD.
Two questions:
1) Is a person w/OCPD necessarily an orderly person? That is, will a person w/OCPD always have a clean and organized room, car, workplace, etc.?
2) I was screened for ADHD in 2014, but the discussion section says that I "meet the criteria for OCPD." What does that mean? Does it mean I have OCPD? Does it mean I have been officially diagnosed w/it?
I worked for someone who has OCPD. At first I thought he was a micromanager, but as time passed I realised it was far more serious.
He would be tied up with customers, the phone would ring, he would attempt to take it off me whilst still talking to his original customer. However he first learned to process a sale in 1985, he’s still rigidly using the same routines now. Never open to discussion, on how to improve his dreadfully embarrassing SOP’s.
I understand everything you have raised, but the impact on my sanity was stretched to its limits.
I have empathy by the bucket load, but I will openly admit that having left this job, I know he’s struggling.
and I have zero sympathy.
YES! I work with a guy that became manager, and is a perfect jackwagon, and abusive about it. He destroyed an entire team by obsessively micromanaging EVERYTHING into a complete halt. He's one person that thinks he is doing 12 jobs, but in reality he took 12 people and forced them to help him do ONE job. And he never improves from day one, he gets worse, because the people that didn't quit simply stopped trying to do anything because he was so controlling and verbally abusive that is was healthier to stop trying. I wish I never would have met the guy. So self-righteous, too. Can't see how screwed up everything is now.
I've lived with someone with OCPD for almost 2 decades and it has been hell. I thought something was wrong in the beginning but didn't figure out what it was until a few years ago. you have to remember, the person with OCPD may think that their way of doing things is right or perfect but it's their perception of right or perfect so doing anything other than what they think is right or perfect is wrong. The person might insist that the kitchen be tidied up a certain way, that the dishes be packed in the dishwasher a certain way, that the food be placed in the cupboards in a certain way and if its not done the way they think it should be done in their mind they throw a tantrum. They might not give 2 cents that the kitchen floor might be dirty or that the bathroom might be filthy. Each person with this disorder has their own idea of perfection, right and wrong, lists of dos and don'ts and for people who have to live with this it's hell. You might be given a list of things to do (and usually to be completed within an impossible timeframe) and if you don't finish one thing on the list there's hell to pay. There's screaming that everything wasn't done on the list and that they were such simple tasks. Yet he starts to fix one thing or start on a project and it takes months or years or most times never gets finished. This disorder is not a good thing. Its not enjoyable for the people who have to live with someone who has this disorder - it's a disorder! Because the person with OCPD can't stand to be wrong they will even look at the disorder and think it's a good thing. I feel sorry for anyone who has it or anyone living with someone that has it.
Pat Thomson sorry it has been hell for you.
I highly highly go down to your quote “it is their own right and perception of correct”... been struggling this for 31yrs with a family in the same house, a mental torture that sometimes im scared of myself in becoming a murderer to the person, because when the tantrum shows up, it really changes your perception of positivity in life
I was diagnosed with depression this year. My psychiatrist thinks I've had depression from a young age.. because of my childhood and how much was expected of me. I was always considered a failure to my parents mainly my dad and they had the same routine every day eventually I got into a routine every day as well. I did the exact same thing as the day before I would always count my steps making sure I took the exact same way home from school it was a sense of security for me I felt comfortable and safe in my routine because I knew exactly what would happen next because I had a specific routine everyday.
Thanks for this. It's given me a lot to think about.
Thank you. God bless you.introvert people be care ful this disease
So glad you clarified. I always called myself OCD, but now realize the diagnosis would be OCPD. So, question, can I be OCPD and ADHD? I just recently took a few online tests that I scored high on, 20 out of 24 for ADHD. I have only been diagnosed with depression and anxiety.
My psych eval revealed that I have ADHD, Schizoid and OCPD and I watch your videos wishing I could have you as my therapist.
So do you think OCPD is borne of anxiety? Like, it soothes one's anxieties to feel like they are controlling things? My brother has severe anxiety, and a few of these things are very strongly "him" but not the orderliness, more a deep need to feel control over situations. This was a really interesting video, I'm glad that I watched it, even though I don't personally deal with this.
The therapists at the clinic I'm doing an internship at mentioned that often patients who don't have control over certain things and are terrified by that (for example we have a patient who suffers from epileptic seizures) tend to develop anancasms. But I honestly don't know whether it's more like OCD or OCPD. I myself was told I had anancasms once when I did a psychometric test and I don't really see myself as OCD because I don't have terrifying obessions while the description of OCPD seems very familiar to me. To me it seems like OCD is more anxiety based than OCPD
Hmm, interesting. That makes sense.
I once told someone I was in a relationship with, "I will never be happy unless I was rich and famous" and she said "wow I don't make you happy"
Which she did. She really did! My heart was hers... but it's like a NEED for an opulent lifestyle. I NEED the luxuries in life. Nothing ever feels like a "WANT" everything seems flawed when it doesn't meet your standards.
Thank you.
I am definitely have OCPD
6 of 8 symptoms
I learned more about my disorder here than from my actual psychiatrist.
My boyfriend ticks all the boxes. After a while living with him and suffering quite a lot. I decided I was going to find out why he was acting so strange. Finally, i hit on OCPD. I gave him some literature about OCPD, mental and emotional abuse, and ASD ( because I have ASD) he read it and after getting a bit more educated on how all those things interacting in our relationship can cause this or that problem, well he has really shown a desire to change behaviors that were harmful or hurtful to our relationship or to me. It is still quite difficult and we try to take it day by day. I am glad he had a will to try to do better and admit, even of only a little bit, that he needed to work on some things.
Why does it resonate with me so much (I’ m going to see a psychiatrist soon)
wish i could share and write about my life with OCPD here. but in order to explain it and express myself, i will waste at least 3 hours (as usual) typing and deleting over and over, again just to make sure i wrote it in the proper way so it will be perfect. (took me 15 minutes to write these lines).
Thank you so much!!!
When you mentioned the money thing, I literally said "ohhhh fuuuuck" out loud because I've had an extreme obsession with hoarding or not spending a certain amount of money in fear of needing it. That includes the idea of spending money on therapy (which I know I need) and pushing it off more and more. I also have a weird obsession with always making sure to have a certain amount saved and if I go under, I'm obsessing about the next paycheck to put it back in that "safe zone" to feel okay.