The moment I really wanted to punch this guy was "I can't even kiss a girl without a written contract!" My dude. Consent is REALLY not that complicated. It's literally just the word "yes!" If they say the first time, without hesitation, not under duress, congratulations, you have consent!
I love how the story writer, when asked if the other players were okay with ERP, threw a massive tantrum and acted like they were being crucified when a simple “yes” could have ended the discussion.
Oh man I saw that guy having that active meltdown yesterday. They completely missed the point every time and refused to elaborate whenever someone asked for examples, which I personally this is a clear sign that they'd make themselves look even worse. Obviously the DM was a complete asshole as well but that doesn't stop the couple from being dicks either.
so, you mentioned the arachnophobia thing. i have really really bad ophidiophobia - the clinical fear of snakes. like, just descriptions of them can give me the willies. with that said, i play in a Conan 2d20 game and snakes are a pretty big part of the Conan world. Like. REALLY big part. my GM told me ahead of time and was very careful about describing them in a way that she hoped wouldn't set off my phobia--it did anyway, but that was honestly okay in the moment, because i was told about it *before* hand. all that to say: people should go into games and face their fears in safe and controlled settings--but thats kind of off topic for the entire video i realize. SORRY FOR THE RAMBLING i just had thoughts and wanted to put them out there for other people to maybe also see/share/explore.
Well... while the Drow are rather linked to the Eight Legged Freaks, they don't have to have them all the time. Heck you could run an entire campaign about a Drow enclave in another groups settlement where they were prohibited from having them around by that group.
Probably some bad attempt at “teaching OP a lesson”. OP and their partner deserved to be scolded for doing ERP without the group’s consent, but this isn’t the kind of situation where using the problem player’s behavior against them is a good idea.
So you say you don't care how we feel when ERP is forced on us? Well how about when I force forced ERP on you? How you like that, huh? Feels like that kind of energy
Yes and it's fantasy so they should be allowed to do whatever they want whenever they want. An excuse I've actually heard before, paraphrasing. I've been on erp sites before and even there, where erp is the expectation, you find guys like this throwing fits over not getting their way all the time.
@kaylawoodbury2308 Wow. You’d think people would want to make sure their partners were into what they wanted to do. Don’t they want their partners to have fun too?
Even I, a DM who doesn’t like having sexual content as it is awkward to me, have to discuss 18+ violence. I love horror and make sure the violent content is not too gorey.
It sucks that there's so many horror stories over this sort of thing that there needs to be a talk about it. Especially when it should be obvious like listing potential triggers on a LFG listing and/or session 0 where the DM lays out the rules and answers questions.
OP's meltdown makes me just think the answer is "no, the group were not okay with it." It would be so much quicker to type "yeah, they were fine." than all that arguing.
Fun fact about the Scott Pilgrim anime: the only reason Netflix rated it 18+ is because of all of Julie's swearing, even if it's censored. The producers of the show said as much. It's definitely a mature show but the only reason it's tagged 18+ is because of the swearing.
Oh wow! I thought it was because of the explicit talk about "adult situations" in the first episode, but I suppose I've seen similar things in TV-14 stuff. Whatever the case, I love Julie lol. x)
Honestly, I assumed that Roxie and Kim's kiss had something to do with it. Because, y'know, people still get stupidly Puritanical about wlw/mlm displays in animation.
@slacarai5109 yes it would be, but remember that we live in the same time-line where _Sailor Moon_ had incestuous cousins in the dub and _The Legend of Korra_ decided that only the season that revealed that the main character was in love with another girl had to be online-only (and not the one about, say, a world war). I can totally believe that the women kissing played a role in the decision.
I remember an incident from a few years ago when Corridor Digital did a couple of D&D campaigns. In one high school themed adventure, Nico (in character) started trying to coerce a timid female NPC into sleeping with him at a house party, and D, out of character, called it out as being basically date r*pe. So they stopped the scene right away, and at the start of the next video the DM (I think it was Sam) apologised to the viewers and explained the situation. It was handled quite maturely, all things considered. We could talk about communication until the cows come home, but ultimately I think the question is one of respect. Specifically, respecting other players' agency and personal boundaries. ERP is not something I would want to engage in or witness in a D&D game, so the least I would expect from another player is to respect that and not throw a tantrum when they're told I'm not okay with it.
As I stated getting into DnD (and ttrpgs) again I found this channel and your content and I adore it and these videos have been helping me for when i start dming my own games, thank you for the session 0 advice
you know i usually listen to these like a podcast but looked up today and oh! what a lovely shade of lipstick! just started the video but wanted to tell you that before i forgor
Hello just wanted to say i love your videos. I have been home sick with Covid for the last 4 days and stumbled across your channel while laying in bed on day 1. It has been my binge watch show while recovering so consider myself a new subscriber. After watching a fair amount of your videos I sent a message to my D&D group thanking them for being such awesome great people to play with giving them messages of love and respect. We have been playing together for the past decade and even though we have had some spats at the table it's always smoothed out and nothing comes close to these stories. It's given me a new appreciation for the table of friends I had found so thank you once again and keep up the great work!
That response sure sounds like a lot of words for "No, I didn't check in with the group before doing ERP" Look, if people want to do ERP? Cool. Hell in some situations, I might even be comfortable being at that table. But without the explicit ok from _everyone_ at the table beforehand... Fade to fucking black. Even if no one's flagged erotic scenes as a line or veil.
I was wondering about that, honestly. Like, I will fight to my grave against the crowd that argues that every reddit story is fake, but something doesn't add up about the DM's alleged punishment.
I couldn't help but wonder, if the redditor doesn't like having to communicate boundaries and stuff at a dnd table, how is their relationship going? Like, you (maybe) don't care to ensure everyone is fine with what you want to do at the funny make believe game, so how do you act about real life major decisions and consent?
I did have a drow / underdark arc in my ongoing campaign, and one of my players told me they are arachnophobic, so I changed the spiders into scorpions, which they were fine with. It also made me think about drow symbology around spiders a bit more critically in terms of world building and led to some weird and creative twists that made it a lot more memorable in the end instead of generic drow spider scary. Not a solution that will work for everyone, and does require a bit of time and energy to realise, but, hey, it worked for us and was fun!
@@JoelCornah Right? Maybe it's because you can see the weaponry so it's less scary to her? Like how in scary movies it's more scary when you don't see the monster.
I feel like people dont understand the difference between unsuitable for children and mature content. Sex, swears and gore filled orgies are not sutable for children, but they are not mature. I agree with that. There have been a few campagnes that I've joined where I have concluded that this isnt the game for me and left. There have also been a couple where I've taken one look at the add and said 'nah', usually when they start talking about it being a 'dark and mature world and snowflakes need not apply'. Mainly because that is a massive red flag that the person in question has no idea how to do an actually dark and mature world and instead its just a hellhole where everyone is either an asshole or evil.
Your point about clarifying what could bother players recently applied to me! I have a friend who likes D&D, but I didn't even consider her for my upcoming campaign. She has a thing about zombies, and combat in the early parts of my campaign will likely look like the Thriller music video. I feel like she and I wouldn't quite click as DM and PC anyway, but knowing she doesn't like zombies immediately narrowed down my player pool.
Half of my crew actually writes various levels of adult content, yet our games are all "fade to black." Because, no matter how invested the individual players might be into playing out such scenes, it's weirdly exhibitionist/voyeuristic to play out sexy times at the table. If that's what your table is into, that's fine, but, you know... _Consent_ is a thing.
Also it's really hard to make it sound sexy in words over a long period of time. Even the best of us as describing stuff can say so much before its weird, absurd or boring. Fade to black saves everyone awkwardness.
Ha, I've basically had this happen at my table. One of my players at the time was poly and one of her partners joined. All free time was their characters boinking. Thank god it wasn't public ERP. But it was literally "Do we ten minutes of down time while Y negotiates with Z? Great, I drag X off to a dark alley for boinking." Every time there was down time.
Group I'm in currently, the DM made a doc that we could all anonymously contribute to, allowing us to draw lines on very specific subjects. It's quite the thorough list, and being able to draw our lines anonymously prevents any sort of ridicule for having issues with certain themes. 10/10, will use in all of my future games.
I love this, my table has done it too and it works so well. Means we can safely go to dark places in the campaign without intruding on anyone's real world triggers
This is why when I run in session 0 the main thing I focus on is telling the group that you guys are a team and you will act as a team. I want to reinforce the idea that you guys are a unit and if you do anything that makes everyone else in the unit uncomfortable you need to stop doing that thing. This cuts most problematic behaviors off at the past, and I’ve never had to deal with any problem, players since I’ve implemented this.
Not really a fan of destiny but if it’s discussion through the lens of dnd world building I think that sounds fun. Also love the makeup! You look great kwispy :)
I recently had a video come up in my recommendations about bad trends in role-play, and it wound up being this guy ranting about the existence of safety tools, censorship, etc. He ranted that anyone using safety tools should not be allowed to play any role-playing game because if anything upsets you it means you can't tell fantasy from reality. It was so wild compared to everything I'm used to in the rpg community. The games I play in definitely have disturbing/mature content, but like you said, there are specific things we all agree aren't okay. Like, if your character wants some romance? Cool! Fade to black sex is cool. No one wants anything explicit. No big. Like you have a couple of things that bother you that aren't typical, so do I. For me, portrayal of psychosis is a little bit triggering for me, due to some personal history. I didn't realize I wasn't okay with that sort of thing until I tried reading a book someone recommended and realized pretty quickly in that I super duper did not want to read it. (Mind of Winter. Still a good book, just very much not for me.) Someone else has a problem with spiders, which means that where there might be spiders, the DM can just replace them or even just re-describe them as something else. We're ensuring everyone has a good time. This is supposed to be fun, right? I just don't know why people want to insist people endure things that would ruin their enjoyment.
I feel like all my takes have been laid out more clearly in the comments already, so I'll speak on the lipstick instead because Iswesr to god it's a thing that all aces look good in plums
hard agree, 18+ is a broad umbrella for varying topics that you generally dont want younger people exposed to. also the describing someone who is wet from water thing: that's totally understandable, honestly. it brings to mind the thirsty slow motion getting out of the pool/ocean thing, or can go into describing how clothes are soaked and.... well... how that changes them in terms of fitting the body ect. that an be a very sexual thing! and over describing it can get weird. i personally do not want feet described for the same reason LMAO
This is there is a table for everyone, that doesnt mean this table is for you. Part of my issue with much of societies hangups about things is that it makes it harder to have these discussions. We just brush it all into a pile and throw this 18+ rug over it.
"The whole gameplay of a TTRPG is talking. So, I'm sorry, but you're gonna need to be good at it, eventually." Joke's on you, Crisper, I'm THOROUGHLY unlikeable and inarticulate!
Exactly! As some other smart person on this vast internet once phrased it, “your right to swing your fist ends where someone else’s nose begins.” In other words, you’re free to do whatever you want unless you’re hurting others.
On the phobia thing, like you can limit your descriptions on those examples. Like for me with Spiders just mostly deal unless the description gets to indeopth. Sadly, having run Curse of Strahd several times, I know there's one area I call the room of nope.
Yeah, I ran Curse of Strahd once. I did have an arachnophobic player, so I asked them if they were okay with the spiders, and they said they were fine, so I went ahead with them. The party’s druid then proceeded to befriend the spiders and put them on babysitting duty for the children the party had temporarily adopted. Turns out giant spiders make surprisingly decent babysitters.
I'm a new GM and at session zero i handed out questionnaires to my players. It included questions with examples if they couldn't think of anythinglike: What are 3 things you want your character to do? (Get a pet, get magic items, lots of gold, fight a dragon etc) Are you comfortable with explicit romance? Fade to black? No romance at all? Are you comfortable with adult themes? Poverty, abuse, slavery, drugs etc? Explicit? Implied? Is there anything else not mentioned you aren't comfortable with? Spiders, gore etc? This is not the full list, obviously. But it let everyone think about their wants and limits for a campaign and for them personally. We are ok with fade to black romance, implied adult themes, violence, some swears and one player is really anti vomit
I have a specific issue when sounds MIGHT be gunfire. If it is gunfire, I'm cool. As soon as it is a question, I get uncomfortable. It's probably a bit of PTSD but it's weirdly specifics. As a note, for our arachnophone, I still wanted to use the Saltmarsh adventure with a ship clustered with silken webs.... so I just replaced every spider with flesh-eating moths and mothmen. And Lloth with an evil moth goddess.
1. An an arachnophobe, I have had an amazing spider encounter, which was only possible because the DM and I talked about my boundaries in depth. People who think setting boundaries limits the game couldn't be more wrong. 2. If you're into ERP, get a room! Then you won't make other players uncomfortable or stall the game. You can even LARP it out if you're into it. And if you're an exhibitionist you should find other exhibitionists the play with. Try munches at your local dungeon. (The other kind of dungeon 😉)
My games are 18+. That means that they're played in a pub that's quick to ask for ID. I think I'm on the same page as you regarding ERP. I feel it takes too much game time for something plot-irrelevant that only exists for the gratification for a small part of the group even if all an comfortable with it. I suspect the rest of the group were not comfortable but the OP doesn't mention that due to trying to look like a complete victim.
Very true on there's a table for everyone deal. Not every campaign is gonna be suitable for everyone. Of course you should do what you can to adjust for players comfort but if it's a core part of the game that particular game may not be for them and there is nothing wrong with saying tbga
Interesting plum colored lipstick. Looks good on you. But you really don't need make up for us. We like you as you are with or without makeup. Agreed, people need to agree on what things they can abide or not in a game. What will the DM have in game and what are players uncomfortable with?
Ya know, I've never actually had a situation where a couple broke into ERP in a game, and I've been playing since the early 90s. However, if I were faced with the situation I'd probably stay in character and start commenting on it. Because it would lead to "Your character isn't there!" "Then why would I have to hear about it?"
Yeeesh. And here I was constantly watching the reactions of the other players while my character had light banter/flirting with my husband's character. (Nothing sexual, grandma would be at ease.) Then again, the other players were calling out, "Roll for rizz!" and pretending to eat popcorn, so I'm interpreting that as approval.
Like.. I've known my RPG-group going on 25 years now.. if someone would even attempt something like an in depth erotic scene or whatever.. it would get shut down. If there's something sexual, straight to a fade to black. I mean, sure, if everyone's up for stuff like that, go for it. But if it's just two players deciding to go at it without a proper discussion with the group, well, that's just plain weird. Also, it's not weird to not want to hear about people getting wet. We all have mundane stuff that weirds us out. Mine is certain sounds.
I particularly detest the slippery slope argument of "If we start requiring consent you will end up needing written consent to look at a girl." And I'm neurotic about such boundaries.
Erping in a normal, non-erp D&D session sounds like it'd be super awkward lmao also he sounds like a very annoying person to be around. I really want to hear the other players' perspectives tbh
I have two characters that I play in a current campaign that are a gay couple, but I only did that cause I thought it would make there story interesting. Has it or does it come up in the game, no.
@OrangeyChocolate the top moderator on the Silent Hill wiki turned several pages into long-winded diatribes against circumcision while barely tying it to the characters whose pages they hijacked, and then went full K-Kultist whenever anyone called them on it. Changing any forum posts that said "circumcision" to "mutilating baby ", demanding that female mods tell them if they'd had their sons circumcised, just absolutely crazy stuff while proclaiming that Kojima was like the prophets of old for calling out a barbaric American practice . . . that's never actually referenced once in the franchise mind. Gaming news websites were reporting on it at the time just because of how insane this dude was and how they had effectively taken one of the largest online reference points for the Silent Hill franchise hostage because they wanted to scream about foreskins dammit.
Im confused with this party's group dynamic. Two players have an explicit but consentual sex scene. DM gets upset. Everyone agrees to fade to black in the future. But then the same DM makes the OP's character part of an explicit and not consentual scene when OP isnt there. I dont understand why the DM is upset with the first but did the second. I can however understand the OP being upset at a lack of consent.
Just going to be honest, If people are holding up the table playing out in character moments that clearly overstay their welcome as the rest of the party does nothing... thats a problem.
New-ish viewer, genuine question re: the discomfort with describing water dripping off of a person’s body/clothing - are you autistic by any chance? I’ve recently learned that I am and I have a similar extreme discomfort with the _sensation_ of getting my hair or clothing wet unexpectedly, and when you said that I started imagining how someone would describe that sensation and got the same icky uncomfortable feeling. Just wondering if it could be connected.
Even expectedly I cannot handle wet hair. I get wildly uncomfortable and won't function normally since I'm so on edge, my partner jokes that when I wash my hair I incapacitate myself for a few hours. Figure it's linked to my autism but you're the first mentioning a corrolation.
In our case our group was labeled 18+ purely so that minors didn't join. It wasn't even a content description and we didn't have any erp or mature events lol.
I really don't understand people who want to do explicit roleplay in front of other people. I actually enjoy ERP, but only with my wife, and only in private. I can't conceive of doing that in public or in front of people....
Sadly this is the problem with public access forums, a community where everyone can have indiscriminate access is a community where the people that no one likes will be more likely to gather. It’s a reason why I have found communities that require Patreon or some other subscriber access have a better chance of having nicer people to play with
The moment I really wanted to punch this guy was "I can't even kiss a girl without a written contract!"
My dude. Consent is REALLY not that complicated. It's literally just the word "yes!" If they say the first time, without hesitation, not under duress, congratulations, you have consent!
No, no, let him think he needs a contract to kiss girls. It'll make sure no girl has to deal with him
@@genericname2747based
@@genericname2747 Touche. XD
Yeah kind of weird to shit talk consent when they were complaining about getting assaulted???
I love how the story writer, when asked if the other players were okay with ERP, threw a massive tantrum and acted like they were being crucified when a simple “yes” could have ended the discussion.
Yeah. It just makes me think that the answer was "No. The other players hated it as well."
Sorry Crispy, you're taking away my player agency by not letting me perform a strip tease at the table bc that's what my character would do! Puritan!
Oh man I saw that guy having that active meltdown yesterday. They completely missed the point every time and refused to elaborate whenever someone asked for examples, which I personally this is a clear sign that they'd make themselves look even worse.
Obviously the DM was a complete asshole as well but that doesn't stop the couple from being dicks either.
so, you mentioned the arachnophobia thing. i have really really bad ophidiophobia - the clinical fear of snakes. like, just descriptions of them can give me the willies. with that said, i play in a Conan 2d20 game and snakes are a pretty big part of the Conan world. Like. REALLY big part. my GM told me ahead of time and was very careful about describing them in a way that she hoped wouldn't set off my phobia--it did anyway, but that was honestly okay in the moment, because i was told about it *before* hand. all that to say: people should go into games and face their fears in safe and controlled settings--but thats kind of off topic for the entire video i realize.
SORRY FOR THE RAMBLING i just had thoughts and wanted to put them out there for other people to maybe also see/share/explore.
* salutes your DM *
As someone who does find the Drow interesting but also has problems with arachnophobia, I feel seen and called out at the same time
Well... while the Drow are rather linked to the Eight Legged Freaks, they don't have to have them all the time. Heck you could run an entire campaign about a Drow enclave in another groups settlement where they were prohibited from having them around by that group.
Setting aside OP's awful behavior, why would the DM say something was off limits, then proceed to commit the very thing they said no to?
A lot of people in RPG horror stories don’t seem to understand basic logic.
Probably some bad attempt at “teaching OP a lesson”. OP and their partner deserved to be scolded for doing ERP without the group’s consent, but this isn’t the kind of situation where using the problem player’s behavior against them is a good idea.
Because op needed to be knocked down a peg
When in doubt, autism.
So you say you don't care how we feel when ERP is forced on us? Well how about when I force forced ERP on you? How you like that, huh?
Feels like that kind of energy
Of course they push back against communication; if they asked, they might have to hear "no". -_-U
Yes and it's fantasy so they should be allowed to do whatever they want whenever they want. An excuse I've actually heard before, paraphrasing. I've been on erp sites before and even there, where erp is the expectation, you find guys like this throwing fits over not getting their way all the time.
@kaylawoodbury2308 Wow. You’d think people would want to make sure their partners were into what they wanted to do. Don’t they want their partners to have fun too?
Even I, a DM who doesn’t like having sexual content as it is awkward to me, have to discuss 18+ violence. I love horror and make sure the violent content is not too gorey.
So, someone on social media got asked a perfectly reasonable question and had meltdown? Looks like it's a day that ends in y.
It sucks that there's so many horror stories over this sort of thing that there needs to be a talk about it. Especially when it should be obvious like listing potential triggers on a LFG listing and/or session 0 where the DM lays out the rules and answers questions.
That lipstick color looks fantastic on you, Crispy!
OP's meltdown makes me just think the answer is "no, the group were not okay with it."
It would be so much quicker to type "yeah, they were fine." than all that arguing.
Fun fact about the Scott Pilgrim anime: the only reason Netflix rated it 18+ is because of all of Julie's swearing, even if it's censored. The producers of the show said as much.
It's definitely a mature show but the only reason it's tagged 18+ is because of the swearing.
Oh wow! I thought it was because of the explicit talk about "adult situations" in the first episode, but I suppose I've seen similar things in TV-14 stuff. Whatever the case, I love Julie lol. x)
Here It is rated 12+
Honestly, I assumed that Roxie and Kim's kiss had something to do with it. Because, y'know, people still get stupidly Puritanical about wlw/mlm displays in animation.
@@nicholasfarrell5981 making something 18+ only because of that would be so fucked up wtf
@slacarai5109 yes it would be, but remember that we live in the same time-line where _Sailor Moon_ had incestuous cousins in the dub and _The Legend of Korra_ decided that only the season that revealed that the main character was in love with another girl had to be online-only (and not the one about, say, a world war). I can totally believe that the women kissing played a role in the decision.
I remember an incident from a few years ago when Corridor Digital did a couple of D&D campaigns. In one high school themed adventure, Nico (in character) started trying to coerce a timid female NPC into sleeping with him at a house party, and D, out of character, called it out as being basically date r*pe. So they stopped the scene right away, and at the start of the next video the DM (I think it was Sam) apologised to the viewers and explained the situation. It was handled quite maturely, all things considered.
We could talk about communication until the cows come home, but ultimately I think the question is one of respect. Specifically, respecting other players' agency and personal boundaries. ERP is not something I would want to engage in or witness in a D&D game, so the least I would expect from another player is to respect that and not throw a tantrum when they're told I'm not okay with it.
Dude you are rocking that color 🔥🔥
As I stated getting into DnD (and ttrpgs) again I found this channel and your content and I adore it and these videos have been helping me for when i start dming my own games, thank you for the session 0 advice
As a guy that does straight up erp games, having everyone else just sit there is bad etiquette
you know i usually listen to these like a podcast but looked up today and oh! what a lovely shade of lipstick!
just started the video but wanted to tell you that before i forgor
Reminds me how i had a dm clarify there wiuld be sexual assault and trauma, but then *surprise incest*
I'm so jealous of how good your foundation looks. I'm so bad at it that I have my girlfriend put it on for me because she's slightly less bad at it.
Hello just wanted to say i love your videos. I have been home sick with Covid for the last 4 days and stumbled across your channel while laying in bed on day 1. It has been my binge watch show while recovering so consider myself a new subscriber. After watching a fair amount of your videos I sent a message to my D&D group thanking them for being such awesome great people to play with giving them messages of love and respect. We have been playing together for the past decade and even though we have had some spats at the table it's always smoothed out and nothing comes close to these stories. It's given me a new appreciation for the table of friends I had found so thank you once again and keep up the great work!
It really sucks that you can't ever get some folks to actually give a shit about consent.
It really is that simple, and that shitty and disappointing.
The meltdown dude is straight up a hypocrite.
Crispy, you slay with that makeup, brother.
Right! Big cutie energy
That lip color is everything 😍
I had been wondering if that lip color was actually makeup or an affect of the lighting/camera effect
Honestly I need the name of that lip color bc it really is everything
Love the color but it looks kind of smeared.
Something tells me the couple are exhibitionists who are mainly there to do this stuff.
That response sure sounds like a lot of words for "No, I didn't check in with the group before doing ERP"
Look, if people want to do ERP? Cool. Hell in some situations, I might even be comfortable being at that table. But without the explicit ok from _everyone_ at the table beforehand... Fade to fucking black. Even if no one's flagged erotic scenes as a line or veil.
Sounds to me like he was straight-up lying about what happened to me.
I was wondering about that, honestly. Like, I will fight to my grave against the crowd that argues that every reddit story is fake, but something doesn't add up about the DM's alleged punishment.
I couldn't help but wonder, if the redditor doesn't like having to communicate boundaries and stuff at a dnd table, how is their relationship going? Like, you (maybe) don't care to ensure everyone is fine with what you want to do at the funny make believe game, so how do you act about real life major decisions and consent?
Wholeheartedly agree with all points (but the main reason I needed to comment was to point out that that shade of lipstick is GORGEOUS)
digging the lipstick look recently btw :D
I did have a drow / underdark arc in my ongoing campaign, and one of my players told me they are arachnophobic, so I changed the spiders into scorpions, which they were fine with. It also made me think about drow symbology around spiders a bit more critically in terms of world building and led to some weird and creative twists that made it a lot more memorable in the end instead of generic drow spider scary.
Not a solution that will work for everyone, and does require a bit of time and energy to realise, but, hey, it worked for us and was fun!
Kinda funny because scorpions are arachnids.
Vriska didn't die for people to not know that scorpions are related to spiders ::::/
@@genera1013 I know!! For some reason she was fine with scorpions?? If anything they are more scary because they have weaponry and armour!
@@JoelCornah Right? Maybe it's because you can see the weaponry so it's less scary to her? Like how in scary movies it's more scary when you don't see the monster.
I feel like people dont understand the difference between unsuitable for children and mature content. Sex, swears and gore filled orgies are not sutable for children, but they are not mature.
I agree with that. There have been a few campagnes that I've joined where I have concluded that this isnt the game for me and left. There have also been a couple where I've taken one look at the add and said 'nah', usually when they start talking about it being a 'dark and mature world and snowflakes need not apply'. Mainly because that is a massive red flag that the person in question has no idea how to do an actually dark and mature world and instead its just a hellhole where everyone is either an asshole or evil.
Your point about clarifying what could bother players recently applied to me! I have a friend who likes D&D, but I didn't even consider her for my upcoming campaign. She has a thing about zombies, and combat in the early parts of my campaign will likely look like the Thriller music video. I feel like she and I wouldn't quite click as DM and PC anyway, but knowing she doesn't like zombies immediately narrowed down my player pool.
Btw that lipstick color looks amazing on you!
So this may sound off the wall. Love the makeup dude, it fits you well
Half of my crew actually writes various levels of adult content, yet our games are all "fade to black." Because, no matter how invested the individual players might be into playing out such scenes, it's weirdly exhibitionist/voyeuristic to play out sexy times at the table. If that's what your table is into, that's fine, but, you know...
_Consent_ is a thing.
Also it's really hard to make it sound sexy in words over a long period of time. Even the best of us as describing stuff can say so much before its weird, absurd or boring.
Fade to black saves everyone awkwardness.
@@kittikats I devolve into giggling trying to describe anything like that out loud. Not exactly the right tone for an erotic scene. 🤣
Ha, I've basically had this happen at my table. One of my players at the time was poly and one of her partners joined. All free time was their characters boinking. Thank god it wasn't public ERP. But it was literally "Do we ten minutes of down time while Y negotiates with Z? Great, I drag X off to a dark alley for boinking." Every time there was down time.
Group I'm in currently, the DM made a doc that we could all anonymously contribute to, allowing us to draw lines on very specific subjects. It's quite the thorough list, and being able to draw our lines anonymously prevents any sort of ridicule for having issues with certain themes. 10/10, will use in all of my future games.
I love this, my table has done it too and it works so well. Means we can safely go to dark places in the campaign without intruding on anyone's real world triggers
This is off topic but I’m only 30 seconds into the video and omg that lipstick looks so amazing on you! You have such a cool style!
This is why when I run in session 0 the main thing I focus on is telling the group that you guys are a team and you will act as a team. I want to reinforce the idea that you guys are a unit and if you do anything that makes everyone else in the unit uncomfortable you need to stop doing that thing. This cuts most problematic behaviors off at the past, and I’ve never had to deal with any problem, players since I’ve implemented this.
Crispy looks so cool!! Love the jacket
Not really a fan of destiny but if it’s discussion through the lens of dnd world building I think that sounds fun. Also love the makeup! You look great kwispy :)
I recently had a video come up in my recommendations about bad trends in role-play, and it wound up being this guy ranting about the existence of safety tools, censorship, etc. He ranted that anyone using safety tools should not be allowed to play any role-playing game because if anything upsets you it means you can't tell fantasy from reality. It was so wild compared to everything I'm used to in the rpg community.
The games I play in definitely have disturbing/mature content, but like you said, there are specific things we all agree aren't okay. Like, if your character wants some romance? Cool! Fade to black sex is cool. No one wants anything explicit. No big. Like you have a couple of things that bother you that aren't typical, so do I. For me, portrayal of psychosis is a little bit triggering for me, due to some personal history. I didn't realize I wasn't okay with that sort of thing until I tried reading a book someone recommended and realized pretty quickly in that I super duper did not want to read it. (Mind of Winter. Still a good book, just very much not for me.) Someone else has a problem with spiders, which means that where there might be spiders, the DM can just replace them or even just re-describe them as something else. We're ensuring everyone has a good time. This is supposed to be fun, right? I just don't know why people want to insist people endure things that would ruin their enjoyment.
I have to wonder if the ones who argue against safety tools and consent are the kind whose daddies beat them until they stopped showing "weakness".
Looking bomb diggity
I feel like all my takes have been laid out more clearly in the comments already, so I'll speak on the lipstick instead because Iswesr to god it's a thing that all aces look good in plums
I just started the video but CRISPY YOU LOOK SO GOOD ROCKIN THE LIPS???? The jacket the hair i'm getting such hard gender envy
hard agree, 18+ is a broad umbrella for varying topics that you generally dont want younger people exposed to.
also the describing someone who is wet from water thing: that's totally understandable, honestly. it brings to mind the thirsty slow motion getting out of the pool/ocean thing, or can go into describing how clothes are soaked and.... well... how that changes them in terms of fitting the body ect. that an be a very sexual thing! and over describing it can get weird.
i personally do not want feet described for the same reason LMAO
This is there is a table for everyone, that doesnt mean this table is for you. Part of my issue with much of societies hangups about things is that it makes it harder to have these discussions. We just brush it all into a pile and throw this 18+ rug over it.
"The whole gameplay of a TTRPG is talking. So, I'm sorry, but you're gonna need to be good at it, eventually." Joke's on you, Crisper, I'm THOROUGHLY unlikeable and inarticulate!
If your agency ruins everyone else's fun, your agency is undeserved.
Exactly! As some other smart person on this vast internet once phrased it, “your right to swing your fist ends where someone else’s nose begins.” In other words, you’re free to do whatever you want unless you’re hurting others.
On the phobia thing, like you can limit your descriptions on those examples. Like for me with Spiders just mostly deal unless the description gets to indeopth.
Sadly, having run Curse of Strahd several times, I know there's one area I call the room of nope.
Yeah, I ran Curse of Strahd once. I did have an arachnophobic player, so I asked them if they were okay with the spiders, and they said they were fine, so I went ahead with them. The party’s druid then proceeded to befriend the spiders and put them on babysitting duty for the children the party had temporarily adopted. Turns out giant spiders make surprisingly decent babysitters.
@@tsifirakiehl4250 Reminds me of Waterdeep where the city guards used trained giant spiders like guard/ police dogs.
Im here for crispies emo or goth faze woot love that color which brans and shade
I'm a new GM and at session zero i handed out questionnaires to my players. It included questions with examples if they couldn't think of anythinglike:
What are 3 things you want your character to do? (Get a pet, get magic items, lots of gold, fight a dragon etc)
Are you comfortable with explicit romance? Fade to black? No romance at all?
Are you comfortable with adult themes? Poverty, abuse, slavery, drugs etc? Explicit? Implied?
Is there anything else not mentioned you aren't comfortable with? Spiders, gore etc?
This is not the full list, obviously. But it let everyone think about their wants and limits for a campaign and for them personally.
We are ok with fade to black romance, implied adult themes, violence, some swears and one player is really anti vomit
"Quiet dignity and grace" --Marty Feldman, "Young Frankenstein"
I am so jealous of how awesome your jacket flair is.
As a long time Destiny player... warlock main. please roast the part of the world building i think you are talking about.
Crispy finally letting that inner goth out 🤘
I have a specific issue when sounds MIGHT be gunfire. If it is gunfire, I'm cool. As soon as it is a question, I get uncomfortable. It's probably a bit of PTSD but it's weirdly specifics.
As a note, for our arachnophone, I still wanted to use the Saltmarsh adventure with a ship clustered with silken webs.... so I just replaced every spider with flesh-eating moths and mothmen. And Lloth with an evil moth goddess.
I never knew I needed Moth Lolth, but now I’m a fan.
1. An an arachnophobe, I have had an amazing spider encounter, which was only possible because the DM and I talked about my boundaries in depth. People who think setting boundaries limits the game couldn't be more wrong.
2. If you're into ERP, get a room! Then you won't make other players uncomfortable or stall the game. You can even LARP it out if you're into it.
And if you're an exhibitionist you should find other exhibitionists the play with. Try munches at your local dungeon. (The other kind of dungeon 😉)
oooh, nice make-up, Crispy! 🤩🤘
My games are 18+. That means that they're played in a pub that's quick to ask for ID.
I think I'm on the same page as you regarding ERP. I feel it takes too much game time for something plot-irrelevant that only exists for the gratification for a small part of the group even if all an comfortable with it.
I suspect the rest of the group were not comfortable but the OP doesn't mention that due to trying to look like a complete victim.
Very true on there's a table for everyone deal. Not every campaign is gonna be suitable for everyone. Of course you should do what you can to adjust for players comfort but if it's a core part of the game that particular game may not be for them and there is nothing wrong with saying tbga
I am down for a Destiny video so that has my vote.
That red color is perfect for vampire cosplay
Interesting plum colored lipstick. Looks good on you. But you really don't need make up for us. We like you as you are with or without makeup. Agreed, people need to agree on what things they can abide or not in a game. What will the DM have in game and what are players uncomfortable with?
Ya know, I've never actually had a situation where a couple broke into ERP in a game, and I've been playing since the early 90s. However, if I were faced with the situation I'd probably stay in character and start commenting on it.
Because it would lead to "Your character isn't there!"
"Then why would I have to hear about it?"
Yeeesh. And here I was constantly watching the reactions of the other players while my character had light banter/flirting with my husband's character. (Nothing sexual, grandma would be at ease.)
Then again, the other players were calling out, "Roll for rizz!" and pretending to eat popcorn, so I'm interpreting that as approval.
Crispy wearing makeup got me acting unwise.
I actually didn't even know Crispy did video game analysis videos. RUclips recommended at work smh
I don't play or watch Destiny, but I'd be interested in seeing a video about the worldbuilding and your thoughts on it
Far cry difference between what two consenting people do and what the DM did TO a player.
Like.. I've known my RPG-group going on 25 years now.. if someone would even attempt something like an in depth erotic scene or whatever.. it would get shut down. If there's something sexual, straight to a fade to black. I mean, sure, if everyone's up for stuff like that, go for it. But if it's just two players deciding to go at it without a proper discussion with the group, well, that's just plain weird.
Also, it's not weird to not want to hear about people getting wet. We all have mundane stuff that weirds us out. Mine is certain sounds.
Gorgeous make up. Was it after Amity or just feeling fabulous today?
i know this is off topic for the video but, are you enjoying the new Thorn catalyst?
Not as much as I'm enjoying the overflow on the magazine! Thorn was already fun with Strand, now it's just brutal.
I particularly detest the slippery slope argument of "If we start requiring consent you will end up needing written consent to look at a girl." And I'm neurotic about such boundaries.
I came to listen to crispy, but i stayed for the jazzy version of megalovania
Erping in a normal, non-erp D&D session sounds like it'd be super awkward lmao also he sounds like a very annoying person to be around. I really want to hear the other players' perspectives tbh
I have two characters that I play in a current campaign that are a gay couple, but I only did that cause I thought it would make there story interesting. Has it or does it come up in the game, no.
I have DM'd and played in several games where we all were young sailors IRL. Sex never came up once. Overly violent, hyper brutal killing Yes. Sex No.
Oh boy, is this D&D's "Silent Hill Circumcision" moment?
Gonna need some context on that one
@OrangeyChocolate the top moderator on the Silent Hill wiki turned several pages into long-winded diatribes against circumcision while barely tying it to the characters whose pages they hijacked, and then went full K-Kultist whenever anyone called them on it. Changing any forum posts that said "circumcision" to "mutilating baby ", demanding that female mods tell them if they'd had their sons circumcised, just absolutely crazy stuff while proclaiming that Kojima was like the prophets of old for calling out a barbaric American practice . . . that's never actually referenced once in the franchise mind. Gaming news websites were reporting on it at the time just because of how insane this dude was and how they had effectively taken one of the largest online reference points for the Silent Hill franchise hostage because they wanted to scream about foreskins dammit.
Play that sax Madness Man!
9:44 that is the exact clip I was thinking about lol
Oh goody, let's!
Player agency is a bit like rights. They stop the moment it starts infringing on those of somebody else.
Im confused with this party's group dynamic. Two players have an explicit but consentual sex scene. DM gets upset. Everyone agrees to fade to black in the future. But then the same DM makes the OP's character part of an explicit and not consentual scene when OP isnt there. I dont understand why the DM is upset with the first but did the second. I can however understand the OP being upset at a lack of consent.
Just going to be honest, If people are holding up the table playing out in character moments that clearly overstay their welcome as the rest of the party does nothing... thats a problem.
New-ish viewer, genuine question re: the discomfort with describing water dripping off of a person’s body/clothing - are you autistic by any chance? I’ve recently learned that I am and I have a similar extreme discomfort with the _sensation_ of getting my hair or clothing wet unexpectedly, and when you said that I started imagining how someone would describe that sensation and got the same icky uncomfortable feeling. Just wondering if it could be connected.
Even expectedly I cannot handle wet hair. I get wildly uncomfortable and won't function normally since I'm so on edge, my partner jokes that when I wash my hair I incapacitate myself for a few hours. Figure it's linked to my autism but you're the first mentioning a corrolation.
Meltdown
In our case our group was labeled 18+ purely so that minors didn't join. It wasn't even a content description and we didn't have any erp or mature events lol.
Your emo fit is so slay, stay skippedy you content king
Meltdown.💀
I really don't understand people who want to do explicit roleplay in front of other people.
I actually enjoy ERP, but only with my wife, and only in private. I can't conceive of doing that in public or in front of people....
Sadly this is the problem with public access forums, a community where everyone can have indiscriminate access is a community where the people that no one likes will be more likely to gather.
It’s a reason why I have found communities that require Patreon or some other subscriber access have a better chance of having nicer people to play with
That's probably why I avoid forums like the plague.
MELTDOWN!
YO I have a plague doctor plush just like that!
I think you should make the destiny video ^^
Does anyone have a link to that megalovania cover?
ruclips.net/video/1JbKOeeGRAM/видео.html
Got ya.
Lets be real Thorn is the most DnDeey Destiny gun
Its a weapon corruoted by dark magic that fires giant thorns
Anyone know which XP to Level 3 video Crispy used at 9:42?
6:52
Oh hey, anybody know what this spider scene is from?