When Trusting A Partner With Money Goes Bad
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 12 июн 2024
- Check out my book "How to Live On Almost Nothing" by clicking here: amzn.to/341g0wT
Paperback: amzn.to/3Z4tUoD
Check out Mint Mobile here: mint-mobile.58dp.net/7meoPg
No gimmicks, it's only $15 a month!
Ditch Cable and Get a Roku Box by clicking here: amzn.to/3JVo2Hy 
Развлечения
I’m glad me and partner trust each other. My wife and I just run with the 4% rule to keep it simple. Save up enough that 4% of your total retirement savings would cover your expenses in retirement. As an example, $1 Million allows you to withdraw $40,000 per year (dividends on investments often pay about half of that).
It's a simple rule of thumb, and we don't bother calculating things like Social Security, only what we save ourselves. We consider that as "extra" if we need it, rather than absolutely necessary.
I’m divorced. i’ve been retired for 7 plus years and my ex husband has been retired for 5 plus years. So far we haven't used any of our $1.2m retirment money each. investing right and Being debt free is what makes that happen.
that's impressive!, single mother of 2, I could really use the expertise of this advisors , my portfolio has been down bad....who’s the person guiding you.
She goes by
‘’becky.
lou.
gordon”
I suggest you look her up.
great! thanks
I don't know if this is a joke or not but if it is true, then that's the American dream come true for him. Same here. I am 53 and retired at 50. One thing I did do to retire early was to get out of the 401K and IRA programs. Bought rental real estate and I am now a Limited Partner in about 3500+ units. I do not work.
I only contribute 5% to get the full company match, that’s it. The 401K plan is designed for you to work until you are about dead. Also, the government does not have their hands on it yet either.
My wife and I live off of our 401K. We don't work. I recommend highly to everyone to build your 401K or Roth IRA's as an alternate revenue stream in retirement to your Social Security.
An observation on 401Ks is when it gets over 300K it starts to accelerate. When you get over 500K it can really accelerate as the stock market grows.
If I may ask, as in withdrew all of the money from the 401K and IRA programs? If so, what was your strategy behind that decision? Thank you.
I learned about government actions from Desiree Ruth Hoffman. Ms. Hoffman explained the benefits of long-term Treasuries and alternative investments, which the government doesn't disclose.
My parents. My dad claimed that he needed to be the only one handling the money because he was the one working and so he didn't even let my mom see any of the documents. You can guess the result. He cheated on her and divorced her and they were both in debt and he had hidden away a bunch of cash for himself. After the divorce she couldn't afford to feed us without her parents stepping in to help. Eventually she got a great job and everything was okay thankfully. If your partner doesn't want you to be involved in the shared finances, you are in serious danger.
Well that's not always true my neighbors husband handled all their money and they both worked and he invested it and she is very well off.
If a couple prioritizes frugality, the stay at home partner will contribute financially, even if they aren't working outside the home. They'll save on child care, transportation, maybe get by with one vehicle, cook from scratch, garden, etc.
But sure, it's important to maintain job skills. Work part time, take online classes, start a home business. And research your legal protections.
Wife divorced me about 16 years ago after 29 years of marriage for another man who was married and ended up going back to his wife. Ex never worked, and tried to mead our relationship, but it was to late I was with someone else already. we have 3 kids, when we divorced they were already grown. Here in Cali it’s 50/50 split of assets. Today she lives with the kids broke and I became a millionaire from working and investing.
I got wealthy fast after my ex wife left me with 3 kids! We found out real fast who was the spender 😮
Pushin 70 now. What I've experienced is those closest to you, will betray you. I've been a professional real estate investor most of my life along with a 100 other jobs. Made an blew millions. Lived like a rock star for years, thought I had brains. Nope, dumb as they come. All my so called friend's were fake. The women were with me for the money, and the guy friends too. Even my own blood robbed me blind. I worked 7 days a week, 19 hours a day for years to make it happen. Yes, I require very little sleep, its a blessing. I'm still sitting on millions in real estate but live hand to mouth because of taxes and my stupidity. Don't be like me, trust only God and yourself. Saving / cash is power. Buy land / acreage cheap and hold. Work your butt off and never quit. Take care of your body and your body will take care of you. Asked my 100 year old Aunt Mary, what is the meaning of life? She replied, " I don't know honey, but if you don't have money, your fucked".
So wise. Many of us older woman got the shaft. Worked our fingers to the bone, lived our lives for the Husband and Children, and ended up broke, alone, and scared. Thank you for warning to others!
Yep. Our mothers taught us to be the way we are, and yet my daughters are VERY independent and financially secure. They will both have much better retirements than I have.
One side of the story only, what's the man's side of the story?
I have a coworker that this happened to. She was a stay at home mom, never thought her husband would leave her. They were “Christians”. But he found someone else and divorced her. She gave up schooling to marry him right away like he wanted. Gave everything up for him and now is working as a cashier, exhausted and wishing she would’ve protected herself more. He fought tooth and nail not to give her anything either. It’s no wonder people aren’t getting married as much anymore.
Also remember, never marry for sex or for money - neither are stable features in life. Marry only if truly you *like, admire, and appreciate* your partner as an individual, and have your prenup and all paper-work in perfect order, out of love for the other.
My marriage was a financial disaster among other disasters. I am much MUCH better off single. 😊
Only when my husband was dying did I find out that after 22 years of marriage, he was leaving our wealth to his sons from his first marriage. Thank goodness I had a career. Apparently, that's the way money worked in his family and I was expected to remarry. It's been 4 years and I'm still single, not dating and will never marry again.
Never date/marry a single father. He belong to his family.
@@ingetnamn-de9fc I took care of him for 17 years after a terrible accident. He was only able to work the first 5 years of our marriage. It was OUR money. He didn't see it that way. He simply had no regard for my future.
@@teresahunt5521"nem" are terrible. I am SO OVER making myself vulnerable, allowing them in, and getting emotionally destroyed... Because hey they get bored every two minutes, have mommy-hatred issues, and want to punish YOU for it.
@@teresahunt5521 What a complete and total selfish asshole
I am so sorry for you. Something like that leaves a mark.
I’m here for the uncomfortable truths and the discipline this was a great segment
It has been proven that if a mom stays home & does that job that a body CAN'T afford to pay her whats she worth
Check how much are paid cleaners, cooks, nurses, teachers...and mum is all of these in one person.
There is no reason for a pre-nup if you both have no money going into the marriage. They only make sense if one has money prior to the marriage.
Prenups should be mandatory! I was a SAHM and got screwed in the divorce because ... you know how they say love is blind? In my case, it was deaf and dumb too. Way too trusting. Wish someone would have beat me over the head with a prenup and a lawyer.
Nala keeps Rocky young😊
I've saved $2000.00 for an emergency. Yes. I've watched your shows. Thanks
$50,000 before marriage is a honestly a great idea
My mother always told me to make sure I always had a career of my own; she saw her own mother be stranded by a husband who left in the night with no money, no work history - nothing.
My mom told me the same thing. I'm a dental hygienist, divorced, and staying afloat due to my frugality. Thanks, mom, for the advice.
Yes men can and do walk away from all obligations. It’s going to be up to the woman to care for the kids. Not saying women don’t do it too… unlikely though
Even if you don't sign a pre-nup when you get married, you are still signing what is, essentially, a business contract when you sign a marriage contract - the only difference between not having a pre-nup, in a financial sense, is that the terms of that contract have been decided by the State and government, rather than you as an individual. And if anyone doesn't believe that marriage is a business contract, talk to someone who has been divorced and see what you think then...
I’m a stay at home mom for a year now and the best thing I did was pay off my student loans and saved everything I could before marriage and children. I found him days after I was debt free so I didn’t have that much time to save. 😂 but now as a finance major all my saving and his income is accounted for. I trust God I pick a great one. ❤
Anyone who doubts this should speak with anyone going thru a divorce!
Then it's too late. Need to warn before that.
My husband hands me the check and says make it work. I do my best. We have 3 properties. I work when I can. I've become good at making our money grow. We have a sizable emergency fund. My husband had no understanding of money management. We discuss it regularly so he understands what I'm doing and agrees with it.
Well we have been married for going on 44 years. No prenuptial here. We have both worked full-time most of our marriage apart from when we had children ,I stayed home as a stayed at home Mum. When I returned to work, I earned almost double my husband. We have always put all our money in a joint account.
Married 46 years. Always joint everything. What has happened is a crumble of society. I detest the idea of secret anything. If you have to do that, your foundation is sand.
Or we are both very lucky and have worked hard on a great marriage.
Be on the same money journey together
Personally I don't feel that there are any real men left or I should say there are very few left. In my opinion a man is supposed to provide for his family. It doesn't mean hiding money and being a control freak. If a man in my opinion is not willing to do that for his family then he doesn't want to be a husband or a father. My dad provided for his family, A grandfather provided for his wife and kids, My uncle did the same, and my husband tried his best until he decided to move on. Just my opinion.
In that regard, I don’t think there are many women left either.
I agree. I've been single for 13 years. Most men I date are living off someone. The few who have their own place inherited them from mom and dad. They are looking at me as their retirement plan.
@@anniealexander9616 yep, a nurse or a purse.
@@PrepperPrincess No the whole world is going to hell in a handbag and is only out for themselves.
40% of all fights and quarrels between partners is because of money. Not children, not pets, not the house, not about plans for the future. If people would learn how to live frugally and get financial education, this world would be a better place.
All women should have their name on a bill even if they are not working, to build a credit history for her in case something happens. Husbands who want to provide for the future will want to help his wife set up a way to create credit.
When I was married we kept our money together. There was embezzlement and fraud that I was not aware. The women I worked with said the first marriage you do that but the second you keep money separate. I would never combine money again. These ladies knew what they were talking about.
In most states “irreconcilable differences” is the only reason they give you to file for divorce. “No fault divorce” laws were a big mistake in my opinion.
Divorce isn't the only way something like this goes bad.
What if the sole breadwinner dies?
I have a relative in this situation. She is in deep trouble financially because her husband died unexpectedly and they had very little saved.
Death is a bit more final than a divorce in cutting off the financial support. Hopefully, if the health is a decline, it will allow people some time to start to get their paperwork & finances in order. Many medical plans or county agencies for seniors, etc have medical social workers who can help steer the families down this path...
It is a classic woman trap. Another thing is that usually the man buys the house and the things that keep value while the woman, if she has an income, buys the food and other things that disappears. His things are there while hers are gone when they divorce.
I'm glad to see that "Rocky Pants" is still alive. My dog died 8 months ago and it is still killing me. You rock, gal!
I’m so sorry about your pup. It’s one of the hardest things to go through
@@PrepperPrincess Thank you very much for that comment. It's very hard. Every time I see your dog "Rocky", I''m so happy he's alive. Hell, I've been a long hauler subscriber of yours for a while. I love what you do for animals and you're a great gal. Keep being you!
I was a stay at home mom but I always did freelance work or part time gigs and kept learning skills. It makes economic sense to stay home with the kids. Day care is very expensive. Now that the kids are older I work full time as well to hold my own. You never know if your mate will be unable to work or leave you. I wish I could go back and save that much! I’ll teach my kids about money and they will have a easier life than I what i had.
Same here 👍 freelance while being stay at home mom was the thing that saved me. Went through divorce and survived. Now the kids are big enough, so I have a part time job which is enough currently for me and the family. Having own savings and decent work skills is sooo important nowadays!
Prepper Princess you rock! You tell it like it is and offer us advise on a path forward. One suggestion for stay at home moms is to take classes online toward a vocational certification or degree. Long term this is an investment in your future.
We knew a couple across town (only by sight) who had a joint savings account for their retirement. The husband cleaned it out to get a sex change operation, and the wife was left alone and penniless. Very sad.
I also was told that if you are married for 10+ years, even if you divorce, you will get social security based on his or her earnings once you retire. I divorced at 9 1/2 years and am now retired. Wish I knew then what I know now. Something to check into and keep in mind.
Great video ❤️ All the people before getting married should watch it and take notes. Because bad things happen. Even if we think they will never do.
As a person who made it through the divorce with 2 kids, being at that time 10 and 5 years old (and I was the one who left the marriage), I was only able to do it because I was freelancing stay at home mom and I had my own money. The money I kept in secret actually. Because my ex took everything that we earned and made together - that was his price to set my kids free and let them immigrate with me to another country.
In my new marriage I am a working mom, our finances are separated. And I know that if anything bad happens with the marriage - I will survive. Love is love, but being ready to unexpected events is extremely important.
Get on the same page financially early on, or just keep living together and keep $$ separate.
I am home on Disability, he works and pays everything but the power bill. (I pay that) I also buy all the groceries and cover a few other household expenses. We do just fine when it comes to agreeing on money. 18 years and counting.
Till death do us part should actually means something legally…otherwise it’s not worth the risk getting married these days. People are too flaky and lack character to honor commitments.
If people really thought death do us part they might think longer and harder before marrying
Hubby and I got married right out of highschool, as people did in those days. We have a pre nup. "You cheat on me, in death you will depart." We still laugh over it.
I absolutely cannot trust my husband with money. That's why I'm the one in charge of our finances. He's great in everything else. I'm the SAHM and manage all the bills and payments etc and he just follows along with anything I say because he knows he's terrible with money. Once he was alone with our kids and spent $200 at the dollar store and other places just buying them whatever they asked for 😅.
Lol
All the advice my mama gave me was "It ain't gonna be no picnic" Damn was she right! Lol 😢
Don't ever depend on a partner, too many things can happen and usually do. My aunt told me to keep a separate account from my last husband, I wish I had listened. I would be better off.
I kept a separate account but it still hurts financially in a divorce as they have rights to half in Texas.
I believe in a Prenup it protects both parties maybe people will get mad at me but Marriage is a Business yes it is !!!
Wise advice. Love the way you've opened up the living-dining room space.
I graduated in 1982. I earned a AAS degree and was ecstatic to get a job offer at $15,000/year
Life has completely changed
1982 was the brunt of the inflation hikes from 1974 to 1982 so you were also paying more cumulatively on inflation than today for short while with prices.
I was married for 30 years to a spender, i was a saver. Stayed at home with the kids for 10 years. I truly appreciated him going out and making the money, he looked at what i did at home as very valuable. We didn’t save much for retirement. He is remarried now, i have been in a long term relationship, we don’t live together.
Great video. As a divorced mama, I am so glad that I always worked full-time and was actually the breadwinner. I also saved my own money even when I was married toward retirement. By the way, I love your dogs. They are so precious. Did you rescue both of them?❤
Yes they are both rescues. Rocky is from the animal rescue foundation and Nala was found in my backyard.
Also, don't marry the wrong woman.
When it comes to money...integrity goes put the window for 90% of people.
Or the wrong man. Abu$ive aholes ruin everything.
I recommend not getting married EVER. Contract for giving up your identity “being Stuck” expensive lesson to learn !!!!!!!!
I'm a sahm now, but I have almost 100k in a 401k from working 10 years into my almost 15-year marriage. Also, I have our $50k emergency fund in my own account❤ I'm staying at home, so I manage the home (which IMO includes our money).
You're lucky he respects you and doesn't piss money away
This is a great topic. Money issues can make or break a relationship, and if you're in one, the money situation needs to be a team effort, or kept entirely separate. I had enough sense to not go into anything financial with my ex, as I knew early on he was really bad with money. My biggest regret though is making some financial decisions that although were not bad, I compromised in places that did not turn out well when we split. Luckily, I wasn't legally bound to anything with him though. I just bought a house on the wrong side of town and would like to be closer to my work now. I should have bought the house that was closer to my work, but bought the one closer to where he worked because he didn't like driving across town. 👎
I was a sucker in some regards, but I was smart enough not to put him on the mortgage.😅
In divorce mediation, my ex did not say that he was losing the love of his life, nope, "I am losing my safety net, my right hand." Wow! I have never had a safety net. He had a hammock. I cannot get with another person ever again as I will never be the "safety net" for another "partner". Divorce removed the weight around my neck. We were never evenly yoked in the financial responsibility department. Nope, not going down that road again. There is peace in being single. I am not where I want to be financially at 65, but I never could've retired if I was still married to him.
Ha! My mother in law said men her age (50s-70s) were looking for "a nurse or a purse".
@@SuzyQueue-zv6ue Yep! I agree.
I agree. When I had my divorce during the pandemic, my parents moved into my house since I travel for work and they haven’t left since. They rely on me to pay for pretty much everything while not caring for my house like it is their own. I feel stuck because in my culture we are expected to take care of our parents but I didn’t think it would start in my late 20’s. They don’t understand American customs and it’s exhausting constantly doing everything for them while working a ton and paying for 95% of things myself when they work full time jobs but just have bad vices and have not saved anything.
GOODNESS ! I'd be writing out a document which lists monthly bills, and divides the money owed by each household member. Then tell them you will only be paying your share of the bills. You are still giving then the gracious hospitality of your home. No guilt. No drama. Just the list of what's going on set out on your dining room table.
Beware and discuss everything before marriage. If someone wants to marry you, then you should discuss finances, crazy in-laws(on both sides), religion, and how many kids you want. I know a couple who were married. The husband was a teacher and the wife worked outside the teaching field. The husband did not put his wife down as a beneficiary to his teacher's retirement account. The man chose an account which would pay him more money each month and have no beneficiaries listed. He worked for 30 years as a teacher. He retired for one year and died. The wife got nothing. It is sad to say but you have got to look after yourself when it comes to retirement. I like the prenup idea and having your own $$ before marriage, just in case you are on the wrong side of the 50% marriage statistic.
My youngest, 24, is living with us due to the crazy cost of rentals and mortgages. He will have $30k at year’s end in savings. He asked if he could continue to live here until he buys his own place. Right now, he is a steward of our home, contributes to food, pays his bills, etc. He is fortunate to have full benefits including matching 401k. He hopes to take some of his savings and put in an IRA.
Pre-nump ain't nobody getting all my plastic bags full of plastic bags!😂😂 jk jk
😂😂😂😂
My partner is great been married 40 years both retired he went back to work part time just to help us out
Don't co-mingle funds!!! 😂.#sorrynotsorry
Very important topic. Thank you.
I have been married twice, and I can say that if either of my husband’s had asked me for prenup there would’ve been no marriage. Marriage is married together with everything most marriages fail because of money. If there is no communication about money and sitting down and actually doing money together, then there’s no business and being married. It’s not about being sexy or whatever it is, you were sharing your life with your spouse and that includes money
Lol
No, I won't share mine.
You do realize we're all wondering how much you got in the divorces or if you buried them for the insurance, right? 😂
I would never get married without one. Been burned about ten times too many by people I trusted.
After my divorce, I was in a serious relationship, but after I talked with my divorce lawyer about what could go wrong with the second marriage should it end in divorce or if I die. I wanted my house to go to my daughter upon my death. I learned that the new husband upon my death would get to live in the house until he died in Texas. If I remarried, I should live in another house with the new spouse and rent out my current home, taking the rent monies to keep the home up. I should not comingle the rent monies or my money. I just decided I could not make myself financially vulnerable again like a marriage makes you especially one with IRS issues and childcare payments from his first marriage. I just walked away. IRS and even student loan debt nowadays can be a real kick in the pants if your spouse dies.
Great video! Why didn't you make this 40+ years ago?? LOL
I couldn’t talk yet.
I thought my vows were forever until my spouse of 28 years spent $50K on something that he wouldn't confess to me about. He lied a lot about things that seemed stupid to lie about. Then it seemed like I was wondering if anything he said to me was true. It's still sad to me years later. I'm better off emotionally without him but the damage has been done and it's long lasting financially.
My ex was and still is horrible with currency. I don't have a partner anymore. I'm doing okay financially since parting.
When you get married you're supposed to become one and share everything. Somebody could be the rich breadwinner today for the next 20 years and be in a wreck tomorrow. The poor stay home soul that got no credit might be the one busting their butt taking care of somebody that's wealthy. And if they think being a stay at home mom or caregiver is easy it's not and it should count for just as much as somebody going out to the door to do a job. Unless they're a slouch and do nothing around the home. You're either in it together or you're not.
I wonder if Nala would play with Rocky if he didn't have ears?
Wish I could love react this a thousand times over. Thanks for what youre telling women all around the world
i like rocky's patience as really lol
Yes your right because I was lefted nothing but my paid out house . And yes my son did help me go throughout it all. And I didn't get my disability till after my husband had passed away. And then it took almost 2 more months too get the first check after the lawyer and others were paid first. And didn't get the 3 years back pay just one year only and glad too get it. Now I just live on just 1/2 of what I get. And keep up keep on car and house repairs. And yes it was so scary till things went through. I've always kept a garden so all's I would have too buy is meats and dairys. And I pay my property taxes every month too keep ahead of the game.
This is the best video I have seen! Been married 25 years at home for 15 years and I have a side hustle. I am saving every dime I make in a high yield savings account so I have my own money. I WISH I had done this fund in my twenties when I was making good money. Now I get paid very little for being home for so long. I am determined to be independent ❤ I will be teaching by young children’s the importance of this type of money account just in case they need it
Your pups....Too much cuteness for a Thursday 😂😂❤❤❤
I didnt do the prenup but we did do seperate accounts, checking and savings and we both had separate credit cards. We put equal amounts of money in the house fund for bills. He was a spender, me a saver. He kept a running credit card bill, I paid mine off every month. I am so very glad we did it this way even tho it's kinda unusal it kept me from having my credit ruined and my money spent on unnecessary things and I did have some money saved when divorce time came. Yes , its best to work and be able to take care of yourself and never assume the partner will cause sometimes they don't or sometimes they die and you are up that creek without a paddle.
The only states that do NOT split 50/50 are AZ, CA, ID, LA, NV, NM, TX, Wash State & WI.
When I am in the early stages of dating someone, I look at how they handle their CASH. If they have bills randomly and haphardlay stuffed in their purse or wallet, if the denominations are not organized, then I can see that they are likely bad at planning their spending. Meanwhile, if they are past age 30 and mention borrowing money from their parents for a recurring/routine expense like rent (not an unforseen emergency, such as broken down car or massive plumbing issue) then I am pretty sure that person is not good with money and not a good fit for me.
Thank you PP ❤ great video
Yes! You have to work at least part-time. You never know when your partner is going to die, leave or be made redundant. If your husband is made redundant you need at least £50,000 in savings so you can use the interest off that to add to your part-time income, at least in the short term. This should at least cover the essential bills until he's back working and contributing again. You never know what life holds.
I was the bread winner. Husband didn't! After 33 yrs he became more aggressive, anger blow ups, he said he didn't want me, wasn't attracted to me and was not in love with me anymore. This happened after I was severely injured on job which rendered me disabled. So at 50 I left with nothkng!!! Except my life and I work daily to have an abundance of peace.
One thing is for the stay at home parent to have about 10-15% of the family net income transfered into their control for their own retirement funds... Tax laws allow for this spousal IRA!! Don't count on generosity or past promises during a divorce!! You might also be stuck with a biased judge!! Most judges have no idea of how much children cost in raising them & have so little child support allocated. Outside of the home, utilities, insurance, etc. divide up the family resources as 1/4 each spouse & 1/2 for 3 or more children. If only 1-2 children, then split it 1/3 each spouse & 1/3 to the kids' support!!
But both of our names are on our fidelity account. It would be split for divorce
I was married my 2nd time in 2019. The pandemic hit, I couldn't go back to work when my job re opened due to my daughter and 2 step kids distance learning. Schools were still closed. Here it is 4 years later I still don't work. I had 10,000. Of my own money saved up bit I continued to pay the same bills as I did when I worked. Now it's all gone. My daughter will be starting high school in August and step kids will be in middle school together. Finally I will be getting a part time job. Now I'm 46 I feel like I forgot alot of my office skills. I will apply at a grocery store. Kinda feel like a loser
If the you can believe it, the mind can achieve it. Quitters never win and winners never quit ( Napoleon Hill). Your still young, fight to the death, the world will be yours.
You're not a loser, raising children and taking care of the family and house is hard work.
And working at a grocery store is not bad at all for a start. Take it one step at a time. I became a caretaker at 46 and got a degree in it. Studying in the evening.
@@marritjansen3542 Thank you 🙏🏼
@@rebel9763 Thank you 🙏🏼
Your feeling is very common when you have been out for a while.
I'm not sure any amount of warnings, suggestions or even sanity re marriage, partnerships or divorce are going to sink into heads these days. The one thing I would strongly suggest, as a seamstress who sewed for weddings, not alterations, the whole gown and stuff from custom couture designs, stop wasting so much damn money! Those fancy 2 and 3,ooo dollar gowns you have to pay hundreds to get altered cost about 700-900 to custom make, and I'm talking silk from Thailand or India with all the fancy lace, labor included, extra if you're a bridezilla. (I quit, no more brides, monsters!) You end up thousands in debt before you even have a foot in the door. And for what? A piece of paper that says the tax man can come after you for your partner's idiocy and you can be like 'royalty' for a few hours? 36,000 for a low cost wedding average last time I checked, and it's been a while. Total waste. 🙄 Rent a dress and a suit and get photos, like sane people. 😂
Total respect for a pro fellow seamstress. Making custom wedding gowns is the hardest job I can imagine as an amateur who mostly does alterations on secong hand clothes.
I did alterations for 7 years in theater costuming. Alterations are insane. I haven't got the patience for it anymore. It's steady money if you've gotten established, but very easy to slide over into custom garments. Keep threading those needles! As my Dad said, you'll never go hungry if you know how to sew. 😃
When I started living with boyfriend in 1990 when I was almost 40 years old I told him that I am going to continue to work and he did make more money than me, but I felt great to be helping out in the relationship to bring in money . I have no children and he wanted to marry me, but I did not want to get married because of bad choices in my past. We did get married 10 years later and that was a good decision, because I am collecting his social security and inherited my parents home in 2022. I do agree that it is so important to work at a job that you like as long as possible which I did until the age of 50 and quit so I could take care of my sick husband who had Parkinson's disease and be there for him. I still miss him. I am 73 years old now and love hanging out with my cat. Keep on doing the best you can with what you have.
I’ve followed you channel for gosh, 8 years now?
I’ve spent the last month, thinking about your advice and channel. My marriage has gone south badly and I trying to get the courage to leave. I’m employed snd work hard. I have no savings and in my late 50’s. He won’t allow me to invest and I’m scared about my future.
I appreciate your advice and happy you done very well investing and living frugally.❤
Hope you did save some money for yourself in the bank? You better start investing today! Take care of yourself, when he decides to leave you, you're really financially screwed.
I saved my bahookie in my late 50s. It is not too late. One suggestion, due to age - only invest half of the money you have available to save. Put the rest in a credit union (not a bank, they have been "sealing" accounts for no reason a lot lately - see the news), savings account that is FDIC insured. This WAY, if the market drops (which it will, because the market goes up and down), you will only "lose" 1/4 of your liquid assets. Because of our age, we do not have time to recover from a huge stock market drop, as it takes years to recover. So, playing catchup with all of your liquid assets in the stock market is too much of a gamble. Only invest money you will not miss, if the market drops. This is a mistake a lot of people our age are making. Younger people have time for the market to recover, we do not. Check out Vanguard 401K ROTH account, that money is not taxed no matter how much it grows. Best wishes. You will feel a lot less pressure in life when you go solo. It is hard to have people in your life that you know have no interest in protecting your future as you age.
I have had to get my wife to contribute more to her 401k and other investments. Just because she would have never ever started doing these on her own. I am sorry you are in your situation.
This needs to be said!! Thank you.😊
I could never trust my husband with the kids to go to work when he got home. Even if you get married later in life, once you leave the workplace for a time, i for one became Ms. Irrelevant
Dogs are so cute
Your advice is so helpful. thank you.
Important info, especially for the young. Thank you.
Great advice for young women planning on marriage and family!
Most of the people I know it is the woman who does the finances in the relationship
Absolutely, No...is the answer to your title question!
Thank you❤
Very good advice!
I am not familiar with the state of CA divorce laws, but I can tell you in the county/state on the east coast, much of what you say does not hold true. Even if a woman stayed home, she gets half of anything accrued after the marriage - period. Pre-nups do not always hold up in court. However, if the woman has a college degree (even if stay at home), courts will not typically give the woman alimony if she is young enough to work. The man pays child support since he had the income, even if shared custody. Courts favor women from the divorces I have observed. As women start to make the same or more as men, this is reversing. Now there are laws in place that were not there to protect women 40-50 years ago.
Great topic!
That was the 1sr time I heard about setting your spouse up with a IRA!
so very true, I know a few people who relied on their husbands/boyfriend to pay bills etc, and the relationship fails the women are lost. It must be told to the young women and guys also that they need to save and work to be responsible and also independent if things go wrong.
Divorcee here, absolutely get a prenup. I had a great job and I owned my own house. Then I met this guy. And ended up getting married. He ended up wiping out all of my accounts after he convinced me to quit my job. I'm lucky I ended up walking away with my house.
Sorry to hear that. What a bad guy
Great video. Thank you.
In a perfect world where people can do whatever they want to I agree. However necessity seems to dictate reality.
Love this video🙏
My mother is barely making it on only Social Security and I am having to take care of the rest not much for now= HOA and Food and when she overspends in error but it's getting more difficult now that she's having memory problems so I am living with her; My worry is that I won't be able to maintain my full time position job that I have a 401k with for the next 26 years that I need to still work. She has no one else. I have been saving for emergency situations but living on the edge of derailment.
See to that you don't end up in the same situation as your mother with no money in old age. She is lucky that she has you. Be frugal and invest as much as possible.
I had the same experience. Make sure you get a power of attorney for health care and finances in place before her memory goes, so you can handle her affairs. Apply for medicaid if she qualifies, and food stamps, and low income senior housing, etc., anything to help financially. Go to the bank and have her put your name on her checking account so you can monitor her spending, and if she is overspending due to memory issues, take over her money management and bill paying, take away her debit card, credit cards, checkbook. Pay her bills for her. Contact Social Security and become her Representative Payee. It sounds like a lot of work, but it is easier than trying to deal with a mess if she overspends or gets scammed.