It can be so great for kids!! My son is 3, we just got a 2 year old foster guy.. he was crying and my son said “maybe he is crying cause he misses his mom and dad “ 😭 it teaches him so much about sharing what we have and caring for others with our safe home!!
Thanks Ray! Yours was the third video I've viewed as wife and I prayerfully consider fostering grandkids of a family friend. Very helpful info. as we begin wrapping our mind around how fostering may impact our family. Also, loved the background artwork. Very, VERY cool.
My husband and I are 'childfree by choice' because we feel there are enough children on this Earth who need love without adding to an overpopulated world (not taking the moral high ground, as I can understand the overwhelming desire to bring life into the world - each to their own and no judgment here), but my husband I chose to focus on the children already on this Earth in desperate situations. As such we are considering fostering as an option, but it's the taking away bit that I would struggle with. Why do they get taken away? And are there avenues to secure adoption of a foster child? We don't care what age the child is. Also, are there any avenues for staying in touch with children you have fostered? Or is that strictly forbidden?
I loved your down to earth information and honest approach to foster parenting. My husband and I are beginning the process and were glad for a balanced opinion. But what I loved most is the poster/drawing behind you of the kid with the green lantern shadow. Where can I get a copy of it?
I am not sure if this is your authentic, actual flow of communication or whether you have developed this style for the purpose of effective delivery. I AM sure that I would pay money and drive to sit in a room a see you elaborate on this subject. Short story medium: GREAT VIDEO! I'm encouraged!
I grew up in state care (Washington). some families really are in it just for the money. I lived in homes where there were 6 kids or more... but lets say 6 for this example. 700 a mth times 6 kids is 4200 a mth and over 50,000 a year. I never got new cloths or allowances. the one time I remember getting a new dress I was in 8th grade and it was for the talent show. in 7 years, 1 dress. my foster parents would go on cruises, and vacations and leave me in short term homes to baby sit me. trust me, some parents are in it for the money. not all, but some.
I was told to my face time and time again that because I was a foster kid that "I was a liar, bad, broken, ugly, addituds were bad, a thief, i must have been a terrible child to be in fostercare, it was my fault." By age 9 I was "untrainable" and not worth the troubles. Many foster homes DID MAKE good money and food stamps but so did ever adult in control of my life. Social worker, case worker, agents, psychiatrists, therapists, pediatricians, lawyers, family court judges. We were a number in pay checks to them and many homes wanted free labour, and soooo many forms of abuse. I hated being a foster kid. I tried to kill myself three times because I was told to or I felt I was not worth life. In one case it was the cocktail of meds I was being forced to take that made me try to kill myself. I don't recall being so depressed or hurt inside enough to do it at that time, I was 7 and on Respital, Riddalin and Prozac. I do hope you keep doing what you can. Kids REALLY need a good, safe, loving home. I aged out and was tossed onto the street. 32 placements and NEVER adopted. The good homes I loved the state forced to give me up or they had to move me due to issues in their own lives. It sucked.
Awesome video! My 1st round ("round" just simplifies things, we don't actually call the kids that, lol) kids are 2 (step)daughters- the eldest just told me she loved me for the first time this morning, and her father and I both melted. She's the teenager who we thought would be "the hard one". Pfft! My 2nd round of kids will likely be teenage (foster)kids because "we are" (read: I'm stubborn) set on focusing on the 'hard to place/less adoptable' older kids (but what kind of label is that to put on a human being?!) And if we have time, a (bio)kid together would be okay, lol. We're literally buying a farm because we're going to need somewhere to "live with" (read: hide from) so many kids. I'm probably crazy because I can't wait to have kid problems. Our teen (my step/his bio) daughter is a dream. My biggest problem so far? Trying not to giggle with excitement and act like an adult/stepmom when she asked for a puppy. I'm just too excited about getting a new puppy! 😂
We have out first kids now lol its been 4 weeks with a 1 and a 2 year old sibling group...It's chaos but wonderful...I definitely would like to make and watch more vids like this...
I am studying my husband works in contruction we are young with one bio baby but we are both rushing to do better so we can buy a home. We know we will foster and adopt and are looking foreward to it immensely
I recently met the most precious little one year old while dropping off some of my own kids' stuff at a baby home After my 2 hour visit i was completely in love with this little boy. I have a 4 year old and an 18 month old little boy at home. Each day i want to message the care giver and ask how he is doing but it doesnt seem appropriate? I want to apply to foster him, but not sure if i'd be willing to foster a different child. Does that mean i should rather not apply to foster him?
Thanks for the great video Ray. My husband and I are hoping to get our foster license by the end of the year. Question. Where did you get the awesome print on the wall that is seen in this video?
Alyssa Stirn that's normal. most people go through seasons of life when they are less able to help than they wished. Embrace your season and prepare for the opportunity you'll have in the future.
never met any child who likes daycare, but that aside, you may want to be realistic about having to take time off work for doctor visits and being up all night with a sick child. Not being negative, just real.
Why you so easy talking about foster care kids is in there who came from devoted Christian mother's which loves them has been moved away maybe true Prejudice or just plain jealousy of her being such as the folder cleaned this respectable mum social Services are immoral jealous people who wants to know everybody's business that don't have a life of their own so that targets only child and they see see I hate them my beautiful kids has been emotionally sexually abused by the foster care and elected by the local authorities and I am fighting everyday of my life to get my kids back all because I left her father in the home who really loved him which was my friend whatsoever as I am devoted Christian mother he would not put my children Annie danger of emotional abuse I have done the stand and the knowledge to know that emotional abuse have an impact on children therefore I would not put my beautiful children that I cherish with all my heart through that and I will get them back don't make light of what you're talking about it is hard for kids to be pulling poems that people don't love them like yourself pointing your finger to tell you know it all you love your own child your own blood you just get paid for looking after a child who is frightened and removed from their parents don't you speak like that you horrible man
You're lucky... I'm in the application process and all I hear about is how unusual it is that I have no parenting experience and I'm treated with suspicion. Drives me nuts
It can be so great for kids!! My son is 3, we just got a 2 year old foster guy.. he was crying and my son said “maybe he is crying cause he misses his mom and dad “ 😭 it teaches him so much about sharing what we have and caring for others with our safe home!!
This is the first realistic video I've seen. As a former foster kids who has overcome some real hardships, realism is both admirable and respectful.
This is great. Thank you. There are so few men in this space. Feeling pretty lonely and scared about all this...
This is seriously one of the best videos I have seen on fostering misconceptions. Thank you for sharing!!
I love that artwork. Thanks for the video.
Agreed, a little bit of love and knowing someone cares about you goes a long way :-).
Thanks Ray! Yours was the third video I've viewed as wife and I prayerfully consider fostering grandkids of a family friend. Very helpful info. as we begin wrapping our mind around how fostering may impact our family. Also, loved the background artwork. Very, VERY cool.
Great video. Lots of misperceptions out there.
Thank you for posting! It's so refreshing to see other men speaking on the subject - these are encouraging to my husband as we start our journey! 🙌🏻
Thank you! I’m single, work full time and am really considering becoming a foster parent. Your video was very helpful to me!
And I live in Washington!
My husband and I are 'childfree by choice' because we feel there are enough children on this Earth who need love without adding to an overpopulated world (not taking the moral high ground, as I can understand the overwhelming desire to bring life into the world - each to their own and no judgment here), but my husband I chose to focus on the children already on this Earth in desperate situations.
As such we are considering fostering as an option, but it's the taking away bit that I would struggle with. Why do they get taken away? And are there avenues to secure adoption of a foster child?
We don't care what age the child is.
Also, are there any avenues for staying in touch with children you have fostered? Or is that strictly forbidden?
What do you mean by "taken away"?
Taken away from biological parents and placed into foster care?
Or taken away from foster parents and returned home?
LJY08 much Respect and Love.
Thanks, this was very helpful.
I loved your down to earth information and honest approach to foster parenting. My husband and I are beginning the process and were glad for a balanced opinion. But what I loved most is the poster/drawing behind you of the kid with the green lantern shadow. Where can I get a copy of it?
that green lantern painting is awesome
I am not sure if this is your authentic, actual flow of communication or whether you have developed this style for the purpose of effective delivery. I AM sure that I would pay money and drive to sit in a room a see you elaborate on this subject. Short story medium: GREAT VIDEO! I'm encouraged!
pro trick: you can watch movies at Flixzone. Me and my gf have been using them for watching a lot of movies recently.
@Justice Korbyn Definitely, I've been watching on flixzone for months myself :)
I grew up in state care (Washington). some families really are in it just for the money. I lived in homes where there were 6 kids or more... but lets say 6 for this example. 700 a mth times 6 kids is 4200 a mth and over 50,000 a year. I never got new cloths or allowances. the one time I remember getting a new dress I was in 8th grade and it was for the talent show. in 7 years, 1 dress. my foster parents would go on cruises, and vacations and leave me in short term homes to baby sit me. trust me, some parents are in it for the money. not all, but some.
I'm curious, how long ago was that?
Thank you so much for making this video!
LOVE THIS!! Thank you so much for this video! Bless you!
It's so cool to find your channel
I was told to my face time and time again that because I was a foster kid that "I was a liar, bad, broken, ugly, addituds were bad, a thief, i must have been a terrible child to be in fostercare, it was my fault." By age 9 I was "untrainable" and not worth the troubles. Many foster homes DID MAKE good money and food stamps but so did ever adult in control of my life. Social worker, case worker, agents, psychiatrists, therapists, pediatricians, lawyers, family court judges. We were a number in pay checks to them and many homes wanted free labour, and soooo many forms of abuse. I hated being a foster kid. I tried to kill myself three times because I was told to or I felt I was not worth life. In one case it was the cocktail of meds I was being forced to take that made me try to kill myself. I don't recall being so depressed or hurt inside enough to do it at that time, I was 7 and on Respital, Riddalin and Prozac. I do hope you keep doing what you can. Kids REALLY need a good, safe, loving home. I aged out and was tossed onto the street. 32 placements and NEVER adopted. The good homes I loved the state forced to give me up or they had to move me due to issues in their own lives. It sucked.
Awesome video! My 1st round ("round" just simplifies things, we don't actually call the kids that, lol) kids are 2 (step)daughters- the eldest just told me she loved me for the first time this morning, and her father and I both melted. She's the teenager who we thought would be "the hard one". Pfft! My 2nd round of kids will likely be teenage (foster)kids because "we are" (read: I'm stubborn) set on focusing on the 'hard to place/less adoptable' older kids (but what kind of label is that to put on a human being?!) And if we have time, a (bio)kid together would be okay, lol. We're literally buying a farm because we're going to need somewhere to "live with" (read: hide from) so many kids. I'm probably crazy because I can't wait to have kid problems. Our teen (my step/his bio) daughter is a dream. My biggest problem so far? Trying not to giggle with excitement and act like an adult/stepmom when she asked for a puppy. I'm just too excited about getting a new puppy! 😂
LOVE this!!! I appreciate you!
We have out first kids now lol its been 4 weeks with a 1 and a 2 year old sibling group...It's chaos but wonderful...I definitely would like to make and watch more vids like this...
Great video. Thanks for sharing :) Good tips!
Jan16 2020 I found this
Great video, thank you.
I am studying my husband works in contruction we are young with one bio baby but we are both rushing to do better so we can buy a home. We know we will foster and adopt and are looking foreward to it immensely
Can I foster parent if I am a single male? No other family members in my house?
Yes
Yes
awesome video!!!
Thank you!!!!!!!!!
Not all states pay for child care! In Oregon they do not. It’s tricky, we’re very short on homes for that reason.
Some daycares takes DCF rates, which should pay for foster kids.
I recently met the most precious little one year old while dropping off some of my own kids' stuff at a baby home
After my 2 hour visit i was completely in love with this little boy. I have a 4 year old and an 18 month old little boy at home. Each day i want to message the care giver and ask how he is doing but it doesnt seem appropriate?
I want to apply to foster him, but not sure if i'd be willing to foster a different child. Does that mean i should rather not apply to foster him?
Great video! 👏💟👏
This is a great video!
How often do foster kids (on average) come up for adoption, while you're caring for them? My wife and I are thinking about fostering to adopt.
In my state (WA) it's about half the time.
Thanks for the great video Ray. My husband and I are hoping to get our foster license by the end of the year.
Question. Where did you get the awesome print on the wall that is seen in this video?
We love it too. :-) It's the work of an artist named Jason Ratliff. www.jason-ratliff.com/
I am visually impaired and don't notice things but I DID see that art! It's great!
Hi thanks for the video, could you put a link to the organization you mentioned you work at in the description?
Sure! I'm at skookumkids.org/
I want to Forster care so bad I'm just not in a place to right now
Alyssa Stirn that's normal. most people go through seasons of life when they are less able to help than they wished. Embrace your season and prepare for the opportunity you'll have in the future.
What is ‘Scookum?’
That's my favorite question. It's the organization I founded. We're based in Bellingham, WA.
www.skookumkids.org/
do you HAVE to get shots to become a foster parent?
Yes, in some states, like WA where I live.
SooperBeez you should, unless you want to endanger the life of the child.
But yes, for the most part, you have to be vaccinated.
Vaccinationcouncil dot o rg
never met any child who likes daycare, but that aside, you may want to be realistic about having to take time off work for doctor visits and being up all night with a sick child. Not being negative, just real.
I've met plenty.
Also, sickness isn't unique to foster children.
Why you so easy talking about foster care kids is in there who came from devoted Christian mother's which loves them has been moved away maybe true Prejudice or just plain jealousy of her being such as the folder cleaned this respectable mum social Services are immoral jealous people who wants to know everybody's business that don't have a life of their own so that targets only child and they see see I hate them my beautiful kids has been emotionally sexually abused by the foster care and elected by the local authorities and I am fighting everyday of my life to get my kids back all because I left her father in the home who really loved him which was my friend whatsoever as I am devoted Christian mother he would not put my children Annie danger of emotional abuse I have done the stand and the knowledge to know that emotional abuse have an impact on children therefore I would not put my beautiful children that I cherish with all my heart through that and I will get them back don't make light of what you're talking about it is hard for kids to be pulling poems that people don't love them like yourself pointing your finger to tell you know it all you love your own child your own blood you just get paid for looking after a child who is frightened and removed from their parents don't you speak like that you horrible man
You're lucky... I'm in the application process and all I hear about is how unusual it is that I have no parenting experience and I'm treated with suspicion. Drives me nuts
Smeared Spoon
are you a boy or a girl
Canoga Parque uhh I'm over 18 kid
Smeared Spoon
you didnt answer ny question