383: Transgender Issues, Featuring Dr. Robin Mathy

Transgender Issues Featuring Dr. Robin Mathy Emily Dickinson, from Amherst, Massachusetts, was one of the greatest American 19th century poets, and after hearing one of our Amherst professors explain her life and work, I fell in love with her incredible poetry. When she attended Mt. Holyoke College as a freshman, she was obligated to sign up as a “Christian,” a “Non-Christian with hope,” or a “Non-Christian without hope.”
She was the only student who had ever signed up as a “Non-Christian without hope,” and she was given one semester to change her registration category. When she refused, she was asked to leave, and spent the rest of her life living in Amherst, baking cookies for children and writing her fabulous poems, which were sometimes included in her cookie packages.
Her poetry was all about loss, which was much the story of her life. However, she was not self-pitying, which is part of what makes her poetry so sad and magical.
Emily Dickinson always dreamed of visiting the west, but never got the chance to travel much beyond the outskirts of Amherst.
She once wrote,
To make a prairie,
It takes one clover,
and a bee.
One clover and a bee.
And reverie.
The reverie alone will do, if bees are few.
Tears come to my eyes every time I think about that poem! When I was a student at Amherst, we used to visit her grave, and I once actually knocked on the door of the house where she once lived. I explained I was a huge fan and actually got the chance to look around. I actually found a poem scribbled on a scrap of paper on a window ledge.
Today we interview Dr. Robin Mathy, who describes herself as “A human who hopes.” Robin is a well-published expert on LGBTQ issues, with a specialization in transgender research and political activism based on science to debunk hateful myths about sexuality.
She is also a new member of our Tuesday training group at Stanford!
In addition to studying to become a TEAM therapist, Robin is a Doctor of Social Work student at Tulane University. She is a researcher and activist who has published four books and more than 50 peer-reviewed articles or book chapters. She is a beloved member of David and Jill’s Tuesday TEAM CBT group.
Rhonda kicked off today’s podcast by reading two very moving endorsements from people who heard part 1 of the live work with Jessica, “Living with Regrets,” which we had published just prior to our interview with Robin.
Then Rhonda kicked off our dialogue with Robin by asking if there are any special treatment considerations when you are working with trans individuals.
Robin said that there really aren’t-TEAM-CBT is already highly personalized and individualized, so we let the patient set the agenda. Robin emphasized the importance, of course, of being warm, affirming, and supportive.
In addition, do not assume that the patient is there because of gender identity issues, or automatically refer them to a support group on that topic, because the patient’s issue may be radically different, and that would amount to stereotyping your patient.
I asked Robin for a simplified introduction to LGBTQ, including what these terms actually mean. That’s because I have to admit I never had any good sexual diversity training during my medical school or psychiatry residency, and I suspect that some of our podcast fans, perhaps many, would also appreciate a little enlightenment based on science.
Robin pointed out that transgender has to do with identity issues: what is your sense of self? Do you see yourself more as a woman or a man? And sometimes, this will be quite different from the gender you were assigned at birth.
So, for example, you may be assigned as a boy at birth, but your sense of who you are may be a girl, when you are young, and a woman as you develop during puberty. In this case, you would be a trans-gender woman. To be respectful, you should refer to a transgender woman as she or her. And, of course, if you were assigned as a girl at birth, but your sense of who you are is a boy/man, you would be a transgender man, referred to as he / him.
Some transgender people are nonbinary, meaning they do not want to be referred to as either a man or a woman, and they do not want to be referred to with either binary pronoun. To be respectful and sensitive, you should always ask someone what pronouns they prefer.
In contrast, the terms, LGBQ, do not refer to gender identity, but rather to sexual attraction. So, a lesbian is a woman who is sexually or romantically attracted to women, and a gay man is attracted to men, and so forth.
The term, “cis,” refers to your gender that was assigned at birth. According to the National Center for Transgender Equality,
When a person begins to live according to their gender identity, rather than the gender they were thought to be when they were born, this time period is called gender transition....

[@Ben-kh7wh]

39:54 “you can’t really change someone’s sense of self, man or woman”
But David if someone describes themselves as depressed or anxious you call it the ultimate con but if someone says they feel they are a different gender then it’s just the truth? Also you preach that we don’t have a self so feeling that your self is a man or woman is not accurate anyway in your point of view right?

[@calonstanni]

Hey, anything that keeps him from being cancelled. Pissing off a depressed person amounts to fVck-all, but pissing off the trans community is a DEATH SENTENCE. #believeautogynephiles

[@brianw.5230]

Could transgenderism be a result of distorted thoughts?

[@r.p.8078]

My heart goes out to people who's androgen sensitivity and biological development don't affirm their chromosomes. Thanks for that explanation. However, I'm not sure if expecting others to affirm them will make up for it.