I’m 19 but now i feel like in 3-4 yrs i will become 23-24 nd then my life will turn around nd thinking this really increase my heartbeat nd brings anxiety too🙂
Don't get married before you are ready. 26 or 27 year is not the right age by any means. Men peak in life after 26 or 27. You will probably be financially well settled just after this age. Take ur time. Build ur life. Be deserving of a high value partner.
@@LaxmiKantaforeverlaxmikanta Currently, people are getting settled by 25-27, current scenario is not same as what it used to be earlier. If you have chosen your profession and have started working on that profession then it doesn't matter whether you are married or not, you can still excel on that if you have strong determination and aim to achieve it.
@@shashanksoni9539 How many people are really settled by 25 or 27?? Getting a job is not same as settling down. Life style has gone up significantly. The question is are you confident of ur financial situation so much at 26 or 27 that you think you can provide a better life to ur family and partner. And what kind of Better that would be? Majority of so called people are living miserable lives carrying out their corporate duty. Even people who in business don't feel settled until they significantly make something that will give them the mental space and financial freedom to engage in any kind of family expansion.
@@LaxmiKantaforeverlaxmikanta First of all getting married does not mean having child too. You can also have a child at 30s. Next, nowdays both husband and wife earns money, so i dont understand which financial burden are you pointing at. Could you please be more specific.
@@arulajoy8060 It's because their generation did things that way but nothing stops them from actually using their brain and thinking logically for a period of time to decide.
well in that case....one must love someone who can do value addition in their life n all just like a co founder does to an business. basically getting married like getting co founder to ur business
I am shivering 🥶🥶, literally shivering yrrr! I am in that age & now i believe that there is a huge career wall which i have to cross ASAP!! to become successful in life. Time is RUNNING out! Hurry Thomas! Hurry! 😵😫😩😣😖🥶😵💫🥵😵💫😵😵😫😩
Hey don't take this dude seriously, he is making a lot of shit up to prove his points, his wife made a similar video, they are both advocating for marriage trapping people in 20s 😂
Emotional maturity and financial stability will lead to a better marriage. So don't rush to get married but if it happens naturally then no need to avoid.
I feel that in the last 5-7 years, the mentality has shifted somewhat. Both partners are now working, both want a stable career, both want their wedding to be perfect. Doing that in our country at the age of 25-27 is quite tough and unrealistic in most cases. So, people are changing, they are more accepting of 30 year olds both men and women.
@THE ZOLDICS If you have an age preference or choice preference talk about yourself. Not everyone thinks like you. Having a child or not having a child is a personal choice. Who I am marrying is my choice. It’s not for you to judge how beautiful someone’s wife or husband is, because guess what? You are not the one getting married. Just because someone isn’t beautiful in YOUR eyes doesn’t mean they can’t be beautiful in mine. Talk about yourself you “sane” human being but not for others
I honestly want to get married by 25-27. I'm a women. I just want to land a decent job which would pay me around 40k per month in some tier 2 city. What I want is just to get out of my parents house asap. Marrying at 25-26 just seems so right. We don't need to earn in lakhs. 30-40k me and my husband is quite enough. We can just grow together and have fun and change jobs and find ourselves and look forward to a baby in next 5-6yrs (or even before if we're ready!!). My parents had me in their late 30ies. In my teenage when I needed them the most they were always too old and too tired for things. I don't want my children to go through the same.
dude, it is already in 29-35, most of the career oriented people are getting married between this age bracket, because most of the people by this age figured out there finances and in a good position on their respective fields. In my opinion there is no such thing as right age for marriage, On of my relative get married at 45 last year, now they are expecting a baby this year. So don't worry, focus on your health and career, and work hard.. cheers...
Varun you married early because 1) you were secured about your own accomplishments, credit to your hard work & intelligence from beginning. 2) you found the right person at early age. If any of these two factors were out of place, you would still be single. You have been focused since beginning but Everyone does not have same learning curve, nor they find their profession which fullfils their hearts desire... Secondly person who you really want to spend your time with. Given the directions we all got since childhood many are still finding both in their 30s. Not a big deal. & Humans are not fishes jinka pool hota hai. There is right one for everyone
Sanchita, Thank you so much for saying this! This video literally scared me, although I see all of his points applicable through my own journey of experiences. I still believe that I am heading in the right direction for myself even if it means that getting married/finding a partner may not be a part of the equation in the current phase of my life. While I also agree that certain processes need to be started early on as they could take time to solidify, I personally tried my best, and so did my family, yet we couldn't find a compatible partner. If I look at the bigger picture, I understand how important it is to heal myself (to each their own), make myself more independent, secure & stable (although I already am) & not worry about things not in my control, of course after trying my best! I am well aware of the drawbacks, particularly in Indian societies, yet I am hopeful & I do see some people around me who are more mature & open-minded around these things with dignity & self-respect, without belittling those who are unconventional (circumstances).
@@__rmk__9360 😊 I know right.. we can not operate in should & should nots. See the variables darling,They are all over the place. I don't understand the point of worrying. He is making this video because certain events took place in his life, that's why he is in position to states these points as fact from his own perspective. Now if he was single due to some reason he would not be in position to say what he is saying. So we can not draw the righteousness of a decision based on his experience, because his experience does not apply to us😊 we are on our own paths. Still we can respect how he played his life wisely.... No need to put it on pedestal 🤗
Though I understand this perspective but in my experience this is not entirely true. I just entered my 30s and I am getting enough marriage proposals from 26-29 age groups, and with my age I think I am in a better position to know and ask what I am looking for. I think what age to be get married is a very subjective topic and it's hard to put in a generalized age group. However be responsible for your career, financial stability and health makes you a good candidate past your 20s too.
but bhai ek hai ki jaldi shadi hui toh bacche jaldi honge and bacche jaldi hue toh unka life dekhne milega and grandson/daughter ka life ka hissa bhi banne milega zindagi me family se jyada aur hai hi kya
@@yadneshkhode3091 or kisi ko bachhe hi na karne ho to? Or life bas yahi nhi or bhi bathi chije hoti h or inhi me fase rahoge to kuch batha nhi kar paoge i am not saying that you're wrong but life me kai things h yrrr
@@kusumsharma2255 Most of the people after a point of time don't want to do kai chize in life. And many of kai chize can be be done with a family. Make your family part of Kai chize. Now it's a different thing if you want the kai chize to be the ones which are done by 22-23 olds.
Exactly. I 100 percent agree with what you say. All my cousins are getting more popular among girls now in their 30s than they used to be in their college life. They still look good, and not only that, they are well established in their career. Girls around the ages of 25-27 are ready to marry them. One of the things many people don't understand is that men and women are different. Women have more options when they are young, because their beauty is their primary agency. For men, besides looks, it's about acquiring social status that puts them in a position of desirability. So unmarried men in their 30s have better marriage options than men in their 20s.
My dad was 29 ,mom was 23 when they got married . They themselves tell me first fulfill your life priorities then get married ,age nowadays doesn't matter much
The only downside to this is how Italian under 30’S lot crib about their parents birthing them in their early 40’S late 30’s with more health problems. Society doesn’t learn that children donot prefer single parenting huge age gap between them and parents kind of trend.
hey varun! genuinely loved this one. i know for a fact that such topics don’t come under your niche yet i would urge you to make relationship based videos as i strongly believe a successful relationship is as important as a successful career. thanks again!
So my aunt has a marriage bureau and while what you're saying is true to some extent, it is only true for conservative society from what I gather from her. The trend is changing very rapidly. It's now much much easier for men and women between 29-35 to find really good partners with no compromise in options.
Are you really sure?? By that age, most (men and women) must have engaged in single/multiple pre marital relations and may have also lost their pair bonding ability(google it),,, this also cound be a reason for higher rates of divorce...marrying early (with maturity) is far better than to wait beyond 30, as it allows for a very healthy pair bonding of couples with much lesser chances of divorce/extramarital. Of all the divorced people i know personally, all ,i repeat ALL, of them married at 30+ of age....im 33 M, moderately established, but not finding a compatible partner-most Females at that age 27-30 carry emotional baggage pf past reactions, and thats stopping me from finding the one! Men-dont go beyond 30/31 for marriage and women-25-27
According to, ancient Indian's, life has been divided into 4 parts and it's very very good. 1. CHILDHOOD 2. Study and be a Bhramachari 3. Be a householder 4 . Final be a sanyasi. This is a very intelligently made timeline by Ancient Indian people and,everyone should follow this
@@halocraze9839 it's all in the mind, happiness is not outside it's inside, with the power of Bhramacharya you can achieve anything in your life. Life is not all about that. Sooner or later everyone, in the world need to reliaze this, sooner is the better, to get out from this.
I don't know what Varun's intention for making this video was. Personally speaking, it puts immense pressure on me to get myself somewhat sorted ASAP emotionally, mentally, physically, and financially, and also have some sort of career path. I'm in that age bracket and boy I have a lot to figure out in life. The math might be right and statistically speaking this could be true. I appreciate Varun using this as a reason. But it just adds so much pressure to people who are in their 20s dealing with a plethora of problems already. Especially on the mental health front. Most of us are broke and seriously doubting our career paths, unhappy with our current employers. It is so important to gain self-awareness and to have worked on your issues to a degree before entering a marriage. What do you think people?
Well, I can relate a bit. If I were to tell a bit about my life story, for some reason I didn't come across "good guys", and even if there were I really never approached anybody on my own considering how my parents used to think before, the typical Indian parents' mentality you know. And it's not like I never dated anyone, I dated twice and they're mostly out of peer pressure and just being in rush to "find someone". I got so blinded at a point I didn't evaluate/considered the red flags well. And more storms were destined in my life. I dated that guy around 27-28, it was super toxic relationship (behaviour), toxic to a point where I felt so low that a couple of times I just wanted to give up. Somehow, I found the courage, got out of that relationship. Workwise, tbh, I wasn't doing too well given that my employer wanted us to work non-stop, I worked for 21 days straight without taking any leaves), leaves weren't granted in first place. I was missing the deadlines due to the hectic schedule + frequent quarrels with the guy I was dating. I was decent at work before all this soup. Right after getting out, within like 14 days, my name popped up in the list of laid off employees, later that company got acquired. I was stunned, things changed so fast. I wasn't expecting any of this. My mental health deteriorated a lot more. In addition to all this, I also lost around 5 lakhs of rupees. I've missed 25-26-27 deadline already. After all these events and battling the mental trauma a bit, I don't think I'm still ready to get married. I just don't feel like. I'm not sure. I had dreams too. When I was in college I always wished to be with someone whom I can love truly. I've been through a phase when I was left with (almost) nothing to lose.. Which was kind of saddening + LIBERATING too.... Not sure if this makes sense, but during these tough times I felt the sense of liberation too..
In continuation with the above message, currently I'm rebuilding my career. I changed my career path. During this whole phase, I distanced myself from a lot of people, I mean I literally deleted a few contacts (including my so called best friends). Moreover, the situation itself also pushed them away from me. (in a way). If I self-analyze, perhaps I do want to get married, but after I have some sort of stability.
Somehow I just don't feel comfortable with the idea of marrying someone when you yourself are struggling. Sometimes I'm confused and I rather question myself whether I'm creating blocks for myself if I'm thinking this way. I also question whether I'm consuming a lot of content which is reinforcing the aforementioned limited belief. I saw some people commenting here that one can find a partner based on their means and stuff and can later upgrade their life with time. That makes sense, but I'm split. I'm a late bloomer too, at one point I so want to guard and respect my natural timelines and when I consume the content which challenges my own beliefs I'm left split.
I completely agree with you! I am in the same boat. My family & I tried our best to find a compatible partner, but none of the trials worked. It was frustrating at some point for my well-wishers, but given all the trauma I have undergone, this topic doesn't bother me anymore as I am focusing on healing myself & working on being more secure & upgrading myself to stay relevant. This video honestly triggered me, maybe because I liked other videos of analysis by Varun, but this didn't hit the right chord for me.
We need a new video on the scenario where between the age of 25-27 there was a pandemic and we were sitting on our couch instead of going out and meeting people.
25-27 I was in the final years of med school and had no personal life, let alone love life. And 28-30 was the pandemic. So here I am, unwillingly single at 30 because I don't believe in arranged marriages and my job circumstances have been such that I don't have a dating pool where I work😦
Sir i am crying as hell depressed for months because i also go to med school (gov) but seats are so limited and there is so much competition i am studying same stuff for three years this is my first drop. As you are in med school will i get a happy life in my carrier because im really really fucked up and also im so old now im 19😩😭😭😭@@BBeeblebrox
I am way behind in my age in terms of maturity, personality development and financially. I lie in this indian marriage age range. But if i take such marriage related decision it's definitely going to be wrong decision by me in future. I do have growth mindset and working on myself. Right now i know in this pool what kind of people will be ready to marry me which i think for me would be wrong person to marry to. In this pool if the person doesn't grow along with time, it will definitely be time we will grow apart.
The problem with this particular idea, & with the way in which it is presented is that it implies that your parents or yourselves are always making the right decisions. People make mistakes, they choose wrongly & ends up hurting themselves. The thing that you think to be right or wrong, may not always remain the same. Opinions and circumstances change. Situations change!👍
Right age,right partner.... there's no guarantee that we will definitely find the right person at the right time or age.... according to this video....human mind is a complex phenomenon,... it's just so difficult to understand the nature/personality of a person completely within few days or months....people can pretend perfectly to be the best life partner... although they are not in real....but finally when you will realise that the damage has been done....
I'm almost touching 30s and unmarried. And next yr going abroad for study and job. My parents already lost hope on me🤣🤣. According to me for marriage ur family background and home, property, height, face also matter. Most girls in india now have high expectations. So even u get a good job still u may remain unmarried for life.
Varun, you gave American example of people getting separated early on but don't you think india too has a good no of unhappy marriages but its the societal pressure due to which people don't divorce/separate. And thus we can't see many examples of Indians leaving their partners?
Great fresh topic, Varun. Love how you keep experimenting with your content bucket. The only thing that remains constant is the relatability and the interest factor.
25-26-27 Interesting. I hold a contrary view: I believe the pool of people you meet, for romantic reasons or otherwise, is anyways extremely small in India. This, in a high-context collective culture like ours, leads to us mimicking the behaviour of those in our group. We believe we're wrong for not making up our mind, when in fact we need to meet people across age groups and economic strata to be comfortable taking our time. More often than not, simply knowing several others have done it later or earlier pacifies our anxiety and worry.
yes we do need to meet more people but the simple point is if the number of people available for meeting starts shrinking, then we are in a sticky situation especially if it was already small to begin with.
I agree with you Ezra. There are always good people out there even in 30s, 40s, n so on. It’s important to come into your own and heal from childhood wounds, learn how to set boundaries, discover your preferences, especially by living solo or travelling solo. Being self assured is key! N of course financially independent. Build your life before becoming someone’s wife!
@@Flybutterfly15, dude, if you are a girl, then I highly advice you to get married by age 25, 26,27. I know you don't want to give up your freedom so early. But I m tell you, it will get tougher and tougher as the age passes. Every birthday feels like a heavier burden. Your own mind will put enormous pressure on you. People complain " All my friends and my sisters are married, but I m still single. Why can't I find the perfect man? "
What l feel about this topic is....well if guys have found your love and they are comfortably marrying you at 25-27...then you should go ahead with it... otherwise don't be in a rush and choose or pick any random person just because you are 25-27.....l strongly believe you should put yourself out there between the age of 18-24....focus more on building yourself...if it is meant to be you will find a partner...if not do not worry...live life...there's alot of people in this world make connections and explore and earn...do not chase it...or become desperate for it. Me being 19,I know how difficult it is to find a long term partner...who will be genuinely compatible for you. Chill guys...marriage is not the end goal..living life...and a happy one should be your end goal. And building strong Relationships should never be associated with getting married lol !!!!
By looking at thumbnail I started to think that he was going to talk about his life but he talked about the Indian society and it looked like a click bait to me.
Hey! Varun I liked this one. You do make a lot of sense it's just that you have put it out verbally and people who understand what you trying to convey, get what you are speaking. I truly belive that you are one those people on the internet who knows what they are speaking and obsevre things very clearly which many can't. I am glad to be part of your subscribers and looking forward for more such insightful videos. Thanks, see you soon.
no matter if the pool is big or small...we are going to marry just one person....also if the pool is big and we have more options...doesnt mean we can get the best partner ...........if we get more options to choose we only get confused.....even in real life or dating app we only interact with 20-50 people max and choose partner from that...
Great, sensible video. Was afraid you'd go like "all ages are fine do it whenever don't listen to society etc etc". The best marriages I know happened in 25-28 bracket.
Almost agree with you But my case is pretty different......I am 31 ..i also view marriage just objectively.... making logical assumptions while choosing my partner and not by emotions... tried matrimony apps for 2 yrs ...no luck.... wasn't expecting any love... suddenly met someone special through ngo work....both of us are in love. However chances of us getting married is very low... because of our difficult background... decided to get married to her only otherwise wil stay single forever....My mind says it's a stupid decision but i would rather go with my heart,😅
Dude, I feel for you. I wish you should get married to her if your heart and mind both agree to that and you have a financial cushion. Chances are your parents will come around
Go with your heart bro. Just dont pressure yourself just because people around you are getting married. If you find peace and happiness within yourself then marriage is not gonna give any sense
This is the first video I saw from this guy and I completely agree with him. If you are average looking guy from average middle class family, it's really difficult to get married around 30. No matter how much money make or your achievements. It's going to difficult. So start searching around 26 so that you will have options to choose from. sad but true
Anyone watching this, don't believe him... You can have your own timelines in life, it is totally normal, obviously not normal as per Indian society and parents but if you have your own timeline chances are you don't give a damn about what society thinks.
Holy shit. I turned 26 the day I got married. Almost 14 years since, no regrets. Not saying everyone should, but nothing to be afraid about. As we grow older, it’s harder to adjust as well.
If I had to summarize this I would say start searching for a suitable partner from 22 or 25 onwards where the pool is large. You will get to know a lot of people and when you find the right one settle with it. At this age there are more options. You may marry at 29-35 but you should start searching for the suitable partner from this age ( 22-27 ).
can’t believe you have seen the world around and have a great open mind to grasp things around you. But your view on marriages are so myopic. Just because you had it simple and easy that doesn’t mean you can generalize it for everyone. I’m a women in my 30s and still looking for love! And thank god I dint marry in my 20s to anyone. I’m so proud of the person I’m right now. I was a late bloomer because of my upbringing and circumstances, but my fought my way up to be where I’m. And I’m still hopeful and optimistic to find my life partner
Age part is understandable, but parents also look within the specific society, which makes parents more eager to find the right one. only lucky few get to find the one irrespective of society, majority just get tired fiting and succumbes to whatever family agrees to. maybe make a video on that.
Getting married and trying to live a normal family life is becoming very expensive in our country nowadays and in future if you have a child that becomes so much of a burden. I think when now in our country people are facing issues of all kinds it will be wise decision to first even decide to get married or not
This is said by you in your 20s, you can't think, what it feels to get in your 40s or 50s without anyone. your parents will not be there at that time..
child a burden? some people have no idea about child burden. the 2nd majority in this country is still considered as minority and the way they are reproducing 10 child from one wife without having any sense of burden shows us how much the so called "minority" have minority and reservation rights in Democractic country from post independence. UCC uniform civil code or common law for all irrespective of religions, caste or creed is the most important ascpet of democracy but this is missing since last 70 years. what kind of democracy is this? it is just a show piece. to exploit he majority. we are all colonized by minority based onesided constitution. unless everybody have common law this country will never evolve in its true potential and both sides will keep pulling each others legs like crabs in the basket and this will effect the carriers of youngsters who want to craft their life the way they want. support UCC, CAA, NRC. politics is the more important aspect of life which effects everybody not only youngsters.
I don't want to get married, I don't know why they need a life partner. Just live alone and grow and earn money and after earning enjoy and then go to mountain and be a sanyaasi
Depends on mental maturity - maybe you could not be your mature-best within that window, but chronological age is a BIG factor - can't ignore nature doing its thing on our bodies - so he's right to an extent - but I would put that window at 27-30 for boys & 25-28 for girls. Again its personal, so Varun hit maturity in earlier twenties, his window is lower, for me that spot came later hence the higher window
a man hits his peak financially and physically after 30, while women peak in late teens, how is it fair for a man to get married before he hits his peak
Didn’t expect this from u. U speak of India as if all Indians n Indian parents are the same! As an INTJ, you can see how all Indians behave differently. & I think different ppl mature at different ages & there’s no such thing as the right age for all. Not all parents put pressure, & not all ppl are ready, not all ppl’s pool is shrinking, in metros the pool is large & active well into their 30s. Professions, education, life situations, diseases, & personal baggage can impact such life decisions and some ppl getting married at 25 can be divorced by 28. There’s NO SUCH THING AS THE RIGHT AGE TO MARRY. 20-45 is the sweet spot!
1. 16personalities./myers briggs is pseudoscience, don't judge people based on it. 2. It's not about all, it's about what % of people. He said many times that if your situation is an exception this doesn't apply to you but to the average Indian it still very much does apply to him/her. 3. Metros are huge places, what you are pointing to only applies to certain posh neighbourhoods not entire cities. A native kanadda living in the older parts of bangalore is not much different than a kanadda guy living elsewhere in karnataka. same with all other metros and the metros themselves are just 4 cities not the entire country. 4. People can marry at 25 and divorce at 28, sure but what is their divorce rate? In India the divorce rate is 1% and 1% chance of divorce is a pretty good gamble to play.
Thank you for pointing out this. Nowadays increasingly more people are getting open to marrying after 30, so no, marrying after 30 is not impossible. Also life's not as general, simple and straightforward as doing sum maths.
You are correct right after I turned 25 this year i started to look at life, goals,self-care a bit differently than before and this experience in itself matured me soo much
I'm 33 and I have more 'leads' than ever. There's a growing pool of boys and girls above 30 who've never married, keep themselves groomed and fit, establish/switch to a soul-fulfilling career, falling in love with themselves first and are ready to wait for the right one. Pretty skewed video tbh, Indian mentality is evolving at a rapid pace.
Outlier here: Corporate professional and married for love at 33, while I've dated throughout my 20s and didn't even consider marriage till i found the right person (at 30). Further, I do take care of my health/diet and most people cant tell me apart from a 25-26 year old. I plan to have no kids and so does my wife. Essentially it all depends on what you want from your life and your partner. But most important factor is that you take care of yourself first.
He is telling the truth my uncle is now 39 and still not married , we were searching girls sice last 9 years but once you hit 30 you will find girls who had divorce or who are windows and life is to short we dont know what can happen tomorrow waiting till 28 is still okay but waiting till 30 is dangerous. Think practically because everything needs balance if any thing gets extra the balance breaks .
There is a clear distinction between how I was when I was 22 in college vs how I am now working 24. I am still in that fun loving adventure loving dude who if given chance will take bike at 3AM and drive insanely fast in the middle of street without any reason. I would be doing that in college as well but now when I think of doing that same thing I will be more careful about my responsibilities. I am more mature yet same level of kiddish as I was in college.
Nich insights well, i probably believe that getting married is one of the biggest descision you make , so just keep in mind and ask youself 1) Are you able to provide good, and happy conditions. 2) Are you the right person for right person. 3) what if you would started to get conflict into. 4) will you be the first person, who will take a step to talk to in conflicting days......
I'd say that it depends on when you find your person, and when you can be financially independent. People, do not let your parents pay for your wedding.
@@TheMsnitish have enough to afford nurses tbh You think kids are a good retirement plan? I've seen alot of ugly shit happen. More often than not, you become a burden to them, makes sense evolutionary as well. They become solely focused on their offspring and their lives.
I highly recommend to any Indian parents watching this video to understand what Varun has put. This is totally worth sharing. Great job, Varun Mayya ❤️
Actually this is true for girls only(not only because of all the above reasons but also women are most fertile and healthy at this age). Because guys at age 27-30 arent considered that old. Arrange marriage works for them where girl is 2-7 years younger than them. Marriage is scary honestly coming from a toxic parent household and seeing that i am running out of time and i haven't found someone yet scares me more.
why worry theres a whole lot of career/goal oriented girl who married at 30 and above...... for example see female celebrities , see female officers,female lawyers, female doctors and many more......
@@toyota7310 not true....from just considering biological point of view you can't make this assumption.....you have to consider career,financial,social and psychological point of view as well.....which makes it above 25 for girls who are single or have boyfriends of same age......
I got a marriage proposal last year , I had lost my father 6 years ago so my mother got insecure when a good rich family proposal came but I am also born brave, I started crying 😂, my mother always had a soft spot for me (second child- her permanent chhota bachha) so she said no and told me to focus on my career. I don't think the concept of marriage is for me but I completely understand what you're sayin, in the last few years I've realised that whatever our parents told us was in view of reality, we were the ones thinking life was a smooth slide on a rainbow.
Same condition as yours (father and being a middle child) .But maybe because I'm a boy there is a barrier between me and my mom.Coz I live with her and the other two out of the station .I am her lab rat from house paint to veggie everything is tested by me.And when something goes wrong get taunts too.But the thing is after my elder sis married everyone was in a hurry for me.And relatives started approaching .Yeah, make him marry.I heard it and said to my mother that I will marry but I need some years.To which she asked me to be clear .I said at the age in which my sis married.She happily agreed.So I am enjoying my bachelor life .....
@@AwwhishekGupta-gm8wi I replied to Rakshita, however I can relate with you a lil when it comes to being a "lab rat". 😅😅🤧 In my case, I'm the eldest one at home, the "first child", although they pampered me quite a lot, however I feel that people close to me experimented with me quite a lot. Maybe it's not their fault too, I was/am the their first child, and they became parents for the first time, had to deal with my various life stages without any prior experience, so yeah.
Exactly, same here. We don't have to follow some society rats race by some developed flesh. They're gonna die one day, I'm gonna die. And nothing will matter after a point. Why not we live for ourselves and enjoy in our own rules?
1.42 billion population hain. Job easily nhi milega. America aur Europe ko milake bhi india se kam population hain. Isshilye baccha paida karna aur apne baccho ko saath julum karna ek jessa hain.
Start hitting the gym as soon as possible and do facial exercises to make it look attractive- Will certainly boost your attractiveness in a year or 2. Good luck my man!
cost of living sucks bro and telling to marry it's a disaster if you come from middle class . early marriages were there in olden times cause life expectecy was low in india as 35 years in 1950 before it's even lower. It's a personal choice not mandatory.
Ok so let me be a lil detailed and elaborative while making few additions to what he said. See, whn we r young, we r still developing, enduring many ideologies, believes, principles and philosophies. We r in a way moulding ourselves to whatever we see n experience. But as we grow older/aged these very believes, ideologies gets rigid and shapes us. Creating fixed,strong personality. And now when ppl marry late, two very strong personality who've grown a certain way, it becomes significantly dificult to change or mould/bend them. On contrary if u marry early, u'r still in the process of gloming, growing and both ppls final personality gets formed in each other's presence, complementing each other for life and growing TOGETHER.
Eg my frnd and i have grown since 5 years together. And now we have almost exact same personality, hopes, expectations, qualities, likes, believes etc. Lst moment pe..jldi ghai me shaadi krne se behtr I would start early, find early understand him earlier n would have a lot of time to decide upon.
so many people saying so many in comments. this is The perfect perspective yet. that's why getting married early with decent enough partner is beneficial, both grow together.
I just feel that It's better to get married before you turn 30 and the range should be 26-29. A person most probably gets financially capable and is mature enough to take important decisions of his life until he reaches 27-28.
Didn't expect such a narrow old school mindset from you Varun.. glad I watched this video now so that I'm aware of what kind of perspectives you have when I watch your other videos..
In my personal opinion, first, marriage is every individual's personal choice not an obligation. Also, boy or girl, dont marry before you are properly financially independent and don't marry before 28, be it you are a girl or a boy, wait atleast till 28. Also, marry someone who is around you age. Age gap relationship are gross and more likely to have Power imbalance and abusive. Marriage should be a union, a mutually respectfull and mutually loving Partnership of Equals. Basically, Your life partner should be your best friend.
@@bamasutradhar221 just make sure u don't regret ur decision later. U might find ur self in a situation where u don't have anyone to share ur happiness with
@@asifmgks4302 I can understand what you want to say, and thank you for the advice 😄 But i still don't hv anyone, i never had, so I'm already used to it 😄. Whenever i had they just used me Its hard to find someone who understands u, and staying single is better then marry a wrong person. My friends sometimes regret their marriage.
This is true everywhere not only in India. I'm 26 now and I look at a potential wife material woman and she shows her colours after 3rd day of dating. It's not gender specific but marrying at or between 25-27 would be difficult now more than ever in our current situation. People want more than what could be offered and this is a problem no parent or marrying parties can overcome. It's not insecurities if you're a forward thinker(Grown up).
![Felix "Unfair" | [Stray Kids : SKZ-PLAYER]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/Oswujxm2Ag0/mqdefault.jpg)
I’m 19 but now i feel like in 3-4 yrs i will become 23-24 nd then my life will turn around nd thinking this really increase my heartbeat nd brings anxiety too🙂
totally man a sudden discussion of this gave me the same feeling
Don't get married before you are ready. 26 or 27 year is not the right age by any means. Men peak in life after 26 or 27. You will probably be financially well settled just after this age. Take ur time. Build ur life. Be deserving of a high value partner.
@@LaxmiKantaforeverlaxmikanta Currently, people are getting settled by 25-27, current scenario is not same as what it used to be earlier. If you have chosen your profession and have started working on that profession then it doesn't matter whether you are married or not, you can still excel on that if you have strong determination and aim to achieve it.
@@shashanksoni9539 How many people are really settled by 25 or 27?? Getting a job is not same as settling down. Life style has gone up significantly. The question is are you confident of ur financial situation so much at 26 or 27 that you think you can provide a better life to ur family and partner. And what kind of Better that would be? Majority of so called people are living miserable lives carrying out their corporate duty. Even people who in business don't feel settled until they significantly make something that will give them the mental space and financial freedom to engage in any kind of family expansion.
@@LaxmiKantaforeverlaxmikanta First of all getting married does not mean having child too. You can also have a child at 30s. Next, nowdays both husband and wife earns money, so i dont understand which financial burden are you pointing at. Could you please be more specific.
This video scares more than relatives 😂
Exactly 🤣
bruh
Yes
Scary video for th boys!
@@viralbook420 is it not scary for you
It's funny how this makes more sense coming from a random guy online even though the parents keep saying the same thing.
That’s so true. The parents that watch his channel will be extremely proud 🙂
Ikr 😂😂
Thats because parents rarely state valid reason that makes sense to us.
@@arulajoy8060 It's because their generation did things that way but nothing stops them from actually using their brain and thinking logically for a period of time to decide.
What if girl is 19 and boy is 22
"Because they know, it takes some time to generate leads"
😂😂🤣🤣😂
well in that case....one must love someone who can do value addition in their life n all just like a co founder does to an business.
basically getting married like getting co founder to ur business
I'm 26, and this is the most frightening video I have ever watched. More frightening than the Conjuring.
🤣🤣🤣🤣 literally
27 😂😂
I am shivering 🥶🥶, literally shivering yrrr! I am in that age & now i believe that there is a huge career wall which i have to cross ASAP!! to become successful in life. Time is RUNNING out!
Hurry Thomas! Hurry!
😵😫😩😣😖🥶😵💫🥵😵💫😵😵😫😩
Hey don't take this dude seriously, he is making a lot of shit up to prove his points, his wife made a similar video, they are both advocating for marriage trapping people in 20s 😂
bro seriously, I am the same age and , I am freaking out.
Emotional maturity and financial stability will lead to a better marriage. So don't rush to get married but if it happens naturally then no need to avoid.
I feel that in the last 5-7 years, the mentality has shifted somewhat. Both partners are now working, both want a stable career, both want their wedding to be perfect. Doing that in our country at the age of 25-27 is quite tough and unrealistic in most cases. So, people are changing, they are more accepting of 30 year olds both men and women.
@THE ZOLDICS don't marry. Because maritial rape law is came.
@THE ZOLDICS If you have an age preference or choice preference talk about yourself. Not everyone thinks like you. Having a child or not having a child is a personal choice. Who I am marrying is my choice. It’s not for you to judge how beautiful someone’s wife or husband is, because guess what? You are not the one getting married. Just because someone isn’t beautiful in YOUR eyes doesn’t mean they can’t be beautiful in mine. Talk about yourself you “sane” human being but not for others
I honestly want to get married by 25-27. I'm a women. I just want to land a decent job which would pay me around 40k per month in some tier 2 city. What I want is just to get out of my parents house asap. Marrying at 25-26 just seems so right. We don't need to earn in lakhs. 30-40k me and my husband is quite enough. We can just grow together and have fun and change jobs and find ourselves and look forward to a baby in next 5-6yrs (or even before if we're ready!!). My parents had me in their late 30ies. In my teenage when I needed them the most they were always too old and too tired for things. I don't want my children to go through the same.
@THE ZOLDICS wtf u r so ignorant I can't believe ppl still think like the way u do 30 is young u can have kids till 45
@@sjjdhwhjw1257 yes right now my goal is the same but i am scared that I would be done with college by 25 26
What a video to drop on valentine's day dude. I'm totally stressed out and I'm not even 20 yet .
lol
I am 19 and Hopefully this pool will shift to 29 - 33 later🤧
Or 40 please 😂
@@RS-im3co 😂
dude, it is already in 29-35, most of the career oriented people are getting married between this age bracket, because most of the people by this age figured out there finances and in a good position on their respective fields. In my opinion there is no such thing as right age for marriage, On of my relative get married at 45 last year, now they are expecting a baby this year. So don't worry, focus on your health and career, and work hard.. cheers...
stay 19
It's difficult to convince children after 29, u can change culture age but not biological age✌️
Modern lifestyle causes infertility 😢
Me watching this at 27 and just getting over a break up 🙃
Been there. I was 26. Now single at 28. Dated a couple of girls during the period but didn’t like them enough to continue. It’s a strange world.
Invite me in the marriage 🙂
everything will be alright fam👍 things will just get better trust me
Bhai , biyah me hamko bhi bulana maja ayega :)
Panditji ko mat bulana ham nikalenge kundli 😂
Never would I have ever imagined that finding rishtas would be compared with 'generating leads' by Varun 😬
Strange, right? Entrepreneurial mind all the way.
25-27 when your Dad is rich 😂😂😂. 28-30 when you stand on your feet.
😂😂😂😂
😭😭
What about both?
People who marry 1 day before turning 25🗿
@@ankit.bass25 “departs to Russia”
Varun you married early because
1) you were secured about your own accomplishments, credit to your hard work & intelligence from beginning.
2) you found the right person at early age.
If any of these two factors were out of place, you would still be single.
You have been focused since beginning but
Everyone does not have same learning curve, nor they find their profession which fullfils their hearts desire... Secondly person who you really want to spend your time with. Given the directions we all got since childhood many are still finding both in their 30s. Not a big deal. & Humans are not fishes jinka pool hota hai. There is right one for everyone
Well said
A perfect and a sensible answer.
This right here. There are so many variables in this regard when we consider people in this country who's situations are completely different.
Sanchita, Thank you so much for saying this! This video literally scared me, although I see all of his points applicable through my own journey of experiences. I still believe that I am heading in the right direction for myself even if it means that getting married/finding a partner may not be a part of the equation in the current phase of my life. While I also agree that certain processes need to be started early on as they could take time to solidify, I personally tried my best, and so did my family, yet we couldn't find a compatible partner. If I look at the bigger picture, I understand how important it is to heal myself (to each their own), make myself more independent, secure & stable (although I already am) & not worry about things not in my control, of course after trying my best! I am well aware of the drawbacks, particularly in Indian societies, yet I am hopeful & I do see some people around me who are more mature & open-minded around these things with dignity & self-respect, without belittling those who are unconventional (circumstances).
@@__rmk__9360 😊 I know right.. we can not operate in should & should nots. See the variables darling,They are all over the place. I don't understand the point of worrying. He is making this video because certain events took place in his life, that's why he is in position to states these points as fact from his own perspective. Now if he was single due to some reason he would not be in position to say what he is saying. So we can not draw the righteousness of a decision based on his experience, because his experience does not apply to us😊 we are on our own paths. Still we can respect how he played his life wisely.... No need to put it on pedestal 🤗
Though I understand this perspective but in my experience this is not entirely true.
I just entered my 30s and I am getting enough marriage proposals from 26-29 age groups, and with my age I think I am in a better position to know and ask what I am looking for.
I think what age to be get married is a very subjective topic and it's hard to put in a generalized age group.
However be responsible for your career, financial stability and health makes you a good candidate past your 20s too.
but bhai ek hai ki jaldi shadi hui toh bacche jaldi honge and bacche jaldi hue toh unka life dekhne milega and grandson/daughter ka life ka hissa bhi banne milega zindagi me family se jyada aur hai hi kya
@@yadneshkhode3091 or kisi ko bachhe hi na karne ho to? Or life bas yahi nhi or bhi bathi chije hoti h or inhi me fase rahoge to kuch batha nhi kar paoge i am not saying that you're wrong but life me kai things h yrrr
@@kusumsharma2255 Most of the people after a point of time don't want to do kai chize in life. And many of kai chize can be be done with a family. Make your family part of Kai chize. Now it's a different thing if you want the kai chize to be the ones which are done by 22-23 olds.
Exactly. I 100 percent agree with what you say. All my cousins are getting more popular among girls now in their 30s than they used to be in their college life. They still look good, and not only that, they are well established in their career. Girls around the ages of 25-27 are ready to marry them. One of the things many people don't understand is that men and women are different. Women have more options when they are young, because their beauty is their primary agency. For men, besides looks, it's about acquiring social status that puts them in a position of desirability. So unmarried men in their 30s have better marriage options than men in their 20s.
True. But thats Cuz you're a guy.
My dad was 29 ,mom was 23 when they got married . They themselves tell me first fulfill your life priorities then get married ,age nowadays doesn't matter much
The only downside to this is how Italian under 30’S lot crib about their parents birthing them in their early 40’S late 30’s with more health problems. Society doesn’t learn that children donot prefer single parenting huge age gap between them and parents kind of trend.
hey varun! genuinely loved this one. i know for a fact that such topics don’t come under your niche yet i would urge you to make relationship based videos as i strongly believe a successful relationship is as important as a successful career. thanks again!
True
So my aunt has a marriage bureau and while what you're saying is true to some extent, it is only true for conservative society from what I gather from her. The trend is changing very rapidly. It's now much much easier for men and women between 29-35 to find really good partners with no compromise in options.
Are you really sure?? By that age, most (men and women) must have engaged in single/multiple pre marital relations and may have also lost their pair bonding ability(google it),,, this also cound be a reason for higher rates of divorce...marrying early (with maturity) is far better than to wait beyond 30, as it allows for a very healthy pair bonding of couples with much lesser chances of divorce/extramarital. Of all the divorced people i know personally, all ,i repeat ALL, of them married at 30+ of age....im 33 M, moderately established, but not finding a compatible partner-most Females at that age 27-30 carry emotional baggage pf past reactions, and thats stopping me from finding the one! Men-dont go beyond 30/31 for marriage and women-25-27
According to, ancient Indian's, life has been divided into 4 parts and it's very very good.
1. CHILDHOOD
2. Study and be a Bhramachari
3. Be a householder
4 . Final be a sanyasi.
This is a very intelligently made timeline by Ancient Indian people and,everyone should follow this
What's life without sex?
@@halocraze9839 it's all in the mind, happiness is not outside it's inside, with the power of Bhramacharya you can achieve anything in your life. Life is not all about that.
Sooner or later everyone, in the world need to reliaze this, sooner is the better, to get out from this.
I don't know what Varun's intention for making this video was. Personally speaking, it puts immense pressure on me to get myself somewhat sorted ASAP emotionally, mentally, physically, and financially, and also have some sort of career path. I'm in that age bracket and boy I have a lot to figure out in life.
The math might be right and statistically speaking this could be true. I appreciate Varun using this as a reason. But it just adds so much pressure to people who are in their 20s dealing with a plethora of problems already. Especially on the mental health front. Most of us are broke and seriously doubting our career paths, unhappy with our current employers.
It is so important to gain self-awareness and to have worked on your issues to a degree before entering a marriage.
What do you think people?
Well, I can relate a bit. If I were to tell a bit about my life story, for some reason I didn't come across "good guys", and even if there were I really never approached anybody on my own considering how my parents used to think before, the typical Indian parents' mentality you know. And it's not like I never dated anyone, I dated twice and they're mostly out of peer pressure and just being in rush to "find someone". I got so blinded at a point I didn't evaluate/considered the red flags well.
And more storms were destined in my life. I dated that guy around 27-28, it was super toxic relationship (behaviour), toxic to a point where I felt so low that a couple of times I just wanted to give up. Somehow, I found the courage, got out of that relationship.
Workwise, tbh, I wasn't doing too well given that my employer wanted us to work non-stop, I worked for 21 days straight without taking any leaves), leaves weren't granted in first place.
I was missing the deadlines due to the hectic schedule + frequent quarrels with the guy I was dating. I was decent at work before all this soup.
Right after getting out, within like 14 days, my name popped up in the list of laid off employees, later that company got acquired. I was stunned, things changed so fast. I wasn't expecting any of this.
My mental health deteriorated a lot more. In addition to all this, I also lost around 5 lakhs of rupees.
I've missed 25-26-27 deadline already. After all these events and battling the mental trauma a bit, I don't think I'm still ready to get married. I just don't feel like. I'm not sure.
I had dreams too. When I was in college I always wished to be with someone whom I can love truly.
I've been through a phase when I was left with (almost) nothing to lose.. Which was kind of saddening + LIBERATING too.... Not sure if this makes sense, but during these tough times I felt the sense of liberation too..
In continuation with the above message, currently I'm rebuilding my career. I changed my career path.
During this whole phase, I distanced myself from a lot of people, I mean I literally deleted a few contacts (including my so called best friends). Moreover, the situation itself also pushed them away from me. (in a way).
If I self-analyze, perhaps I do want to get married, but after I have some sort of stability.
Somehow I just don't feel comfortable with the idea of marrying someone when you yourself are struggling.
Sometimes I'm confused and I rather question myself whether I'm creating blocks for myself if I'm thinking this way. I also question whether I'm consuming a lot of content which is reinforcing the aforementioned limited belief.
I saw some people commenting here that one can find a partner based on their means and stuff and can later upgrade their life with time. That makes sense, but I'm split.
I'm a late bloomer too, at one point I so want to guard and respect my natural timelines and when I consume the content which challenges my own beliefs I'm left split.
Absolutely right
I completely agree with you! I am in the same boat. My family & I tried our best to find a compatible partner, but none of the trials worked. It was frustrating at some point for my well-wishers, but given all the trauma I have undergone, this topic doesn't bother me anymore as I am focusing on healing myself & working on being more secure & upgrading myself to stay relevant. This video honestly triggered me, maybe because I liked other videos of analysis by Varun, but this didn't hit the right chord for me.
We need a new video on the scenario where between the age of 25-27 there was a pandemic and we were sitting on our couch instead of going out and meeting people.
25-27 I was in the final years of med school and had no personal life, let alone love life. And 28-30 was the pandemic. So here I am, unwillingly single at 30 because I don't believe in arranged marriages and my job circumstances have been such that I don't have a dating pool where I work😦
Sir i am crying as hell depressed for months because i also go to med school (gov) but seats are so limited and there is so much competition i am studying same stuff for three years this is my first drop. As you are in med school will i get a happy life in my carrier because im really really fucked up and also im so old now im 19😩😭😭😭@@BBeeblebrox
I am way behind in my age in terms of maturity, personality development and financially. I lie in this indian marriage age range. But if i take such marriage related decision it's definitely going to be wrong decision by me in future. I do have growth mindset and working on myself. Right now i know in this pool what kind of people will be ready to marry me which i think for me would be wrong person to marry to. In this pool if the person doesn't grow along with time, it will definitely be time we will grow apart.
Absolutely right. You keep believing in yourself and move forward bro
Don't agree. Different people mature differently.
Obviously
Build yourself. Amount to something.
"There is no right age to get married" - A 8 year old listening to this...
I am 25 now and my parents are forcing me daily to get married. This guy said things which i am feeling right now.
Boy or girl?
Same 😓
@@AapkaAnna doesn't matter, parents always get what they want. OP will be married by 27, parental push is a very serious thing.
keep fighting against pressure it;s your life do what's right for you
Tell them you are Gay...
The problem with this particular idea, & with the way in which it is presented is that it implies that your parents or yourselves are always making the right decisions. People make mistakes, they choose wrongly & ends up hurting themselves. The thing that you think to be right or wrong, may not always remain the same. Opinions and circumstances change. Situations change!👍
you can make that wrong decision at any age tho
@@shivangbhardwaj826 Exactly👍 and even at the age of 26-27!
@@vippsmillennial6336 at any age but the number of options to choose from is more
Right age,right partner.... there's no guarantee that we will definitely find the right person at the right time or age.... according to this video....human mind is a complex phenomenon,... it's just so difficult to understand the nature/personality of a person completely within few days or months....people can pretend perfectly to be the best life partner... although they are not in real....but finally when you will realise that the damage has been done....
I believe older friendship are more stronger childhood or college friends have a special place
_Stronger_ already means "more strong"; "more stronger" is redundant.
I'm almost touching 30s and unmarried. And next yr going abroad for study and job. My parents already lost hope on me🤣🤣. According to me for marriage ur family background and home, property, height, face also matter. Most girls in india now have high expectations. So even u get a good job still u may remain unmarried for life.
I respect people like you.
Most of the times marriage is done just to satisfy someone's family honor, it's not an obligation like money or job it's just a choice.
I am 27. I feel.like escaping abroad. Don't which country I should go to?
Don't blame woman for your shortcomings
@@Anika9691 😂😂😂 wake up to reality 🥱
Varun, you gave American example of people getting separated early on but don't you think india too has a good no of unhappy marriages but its the societal pressure due to which people don't divorce/separate. And thus we can't see many examples of Indians leaving their partners?
After a time they start loving each other and they are happy and its better than divorce.
India is a status-driven society. Divorce/separation leads to downfall of their status
@@notreallystrangers191 lol 🤣🤣🤣
@@hrishii.02 what??
@@notreallystrangers191 I don't think that's right to say, there would be very cases
Great fresh topic, Varun. Love how you keep experimenting with your content bucket. The only thing that remains constant is the relatability and the interest factor.
25-26-27
Interesting.
I hold a contrary view: I believe the pool of people you meet, for romantic reasons or otherwise, is anyways extremely small in India.
This, in a high-context collective culture like ours, leads to us mimicking the behaviour of those in our group.
We believe we're wrong for not making up our mind, when in fact we need to meet people across age groups and economic strata to be comfortable taking our time. More often than not, simply knowing several others have done it later or earlier pacifies our anxiety and worry.
yes we do need to meet more people but the simple point is if the number of people available for meeting starts shrinking, then we are in a sticky situation especially if it was already small to begin with.
I agree with you Ezra. There are always good people out there even in 30s, 40s, n so on. It’s important to come into your own and heal from childhood wounds, learn how to set boundaries, discover your preferences, especially by living solo or travelling solo. Being self assured is key! N of course financially independent.
Build your life before becoming someone’s wife!
@@Flybutterfly15, dude, if you are a girl, then I highly advice you to get married by age 25, 26,27. I know you don't want to give up your freedom so early. But I m tell you, it will get tougher and tougher as the age passes. Every birthday feels like a heavier burden. Your own mind will put enormous pressure on you. People complain " All my friends and my sisters are married, but I m still single. Why can't I find the perfect man? "
What l feel about this topic is....well if guys have found your love and they are comfortably marrying you at 25-27...then you should go ahead with it... otherwise don't be in a rush and choose or pick any random person just because you are 25-27.....l strongly believe you should put yourself out there between the age of 18-24....focus more on building yourself...if it is meant to be you will find a partner...if not do not worry...live life...there's alot of people in this world make connections and explore and earn...do not chase it...or become desperate for it. Me being 19,I know how difficult it is to find a long term partner...who will be genuinely compatible for you. Chill guys...marriage is not the end goal..living life...and a happy one should be your end goal. And building strong Relationships should never be associated with getting married lol !!!!
The day this dude's content goes mainstream, India will evolve in a step up function way
Rohan.
Reading your comment made me feel smart today 😶😂
Can you help me understand what is a step function?
@@ezratyson8544 f(x) = [x] bhai 11th me tha 🗿
Like ankur warikoo
By looking at thumbnail I started to think that he was going to talk about his life but he talked about the Indian society and it looked like a click bait to me.
Hey! Varun
I liked this one. You do make a lot of sense it's just that you have put it out verbally and people who understand what you trying to convey, get what you are speaking. I truly belive that you are one those people on the internet who knows what they are speaking and obsevre things very clearly which many can't. I am glad to be part of your subscribers and looking forward for more such insightful videos.
Thanks, see you soon.
no matter if the pool is big or small...we are going to marry just one person....also if the pool is big and we have more options...doesnt mean we can get the best partner ...........if we get more options to choose we only get confused.....even in real life or dating app we only interact with 20-50 people max and choose partner from that...
Great, sensible video. Was afraid you'd go like "all ages are fine do it whenever don't listen to society etc etc". The best marriages I know happened in 25-28 bracket.
I don't know Why Me being a 17 is watching this video, as there is plenty of time for marriage and that stuff for me 🙂😳
Yeah but time flies specially after 12th you won't even realise
@@Ss-ze8ym realizing it as my 2 year of engineering just passed so fast man
Iit? Btech? @@avinashthakur3795
Almost agree with you
But my case is pretty different......I am 31 ..i also view marriage just objectively.... making logical assumptions while choosing my partner and not by emotions... tried matrimony apps for 2 yrs ...no luck.... wasn't expecting any love... suddenly met someone special through ngo work....both of us are in love. However chances of us getting married is very low... because of our difficult background... decided to get married to her only otherwise wil stay single forever....My mind says it's a stupid decision but i would rather go with my heart,😅
Lol
Dude, I feel for you. I wish you should get married to her if your heart and mind both agree to that and you have a financial cushion. Chances are your parents will come around
Heart and mind 😅
Go with your heart bro. Just dont pressure yourself just because people around you are getting married. If you find peace and happiness within yourself then marriage is not gonna give any sense
What happened are you married with her
Don't take Marriage advice from Businessman 😅😅
For majority 90%, advice from businessmen are good,
Then there are top lucky 10%, for them these statistics doesn't matter.
And special if he is a FRIEND OF PRAKHAR GUPTA😄😄😄
Don't take any advice from random commentetor
This creates a paradox
I'm 25 and happily single 😎
This is the first video I saw from this guy and I completely agree with him. If you are average looking guy from average middle class family, it's really difficult to get married around 30. No matter how much money make or your achievements. It's going to difficult. So start searching around 26 so that you will have options to choose from. sad but true
Anyone watching this, don't believe him... You can have your own timelines in life, it is totally normal, obviously not normal as per Indian society and parents but if you have your own timeline chances are you don't give a damn about what society thinks.
Everyone cares abt what other people think of themselves.
Holy shit. I turned 26 the day I got married. Almost 14 years since, no regrets. Not saying everyone should, but nothing to be afraid about. As we grow older, it’s harder to adjust as well.
If I had to summarize this I would say start searching for a suitable partner from 22 or 25 onwards where the pool is large. You will get to know a lot of people and when you find the right one settle with it. At this age there are more options. You may marry at 29-35 but you should start searching for the suitable partner from this age ( 22-27 ).
can’t believe you have seen the world around and have a great open mind to grasp things around you. But your view on marriages are so myopic. Just because you had it simple and easy that doesn’t mean you can generalize it for everyone.
I’m a women in my 30s and still looking for love! And thank god I dint marry in my 20s to anyone. I’m so proud of the person I’m right now. I was a late bloomer because of my upbringing and circumstances, but my fought my way up to be where I’m. And I’m still hopeful and optimistic to find my life partner
Age part is understandable, but parents also look within the specific society, which makes parents more eager to find the right one. only lucky few get to find the one irrespective of society, majority just get tired fiting and succumbes to whatever family agrees to. maybe make a video on that.
Getting married and trying to live a normal family life is becoming very expensive in our country nowadays and in future if you have a child that becomes so much of a burden. I think when now in our country people are facing issues of all kinds it will be wise decision to first even decide to get married or not
So true
This is said by you in your 20s, you can't think, what it feels to get in your 40s or 50s without anyone. your parents will not be there at that time..
depends, in metropolitan areas, yah. Everywhere else, no.
child a burden? some people have no idea about child burden. the 2nd majority in this country is still considered as minority and the way they are reproducing 10 child from one wife without having any sense of burden shows us how much the so called "minority" have minority and reservation rights in Democractic country from post independence. UCC uniform civil code or common law for all irrespective of religions, caste or creed is the most important ascpet of democracy but this is missing since last 70 years. what kind of democracy is this? it is just a show piece. to exploit he majority. we are all colonized by minority based onesided constitution. unless everybody have common law this country will never evolve in its true potential and both sides will keep pulling each others legs like crabs in the basket and this will effect the carriers of youngsters who want to craft their life the way they want. support UCC, CAA, NRC. politics is the more important aspect of life which effects everybody not only youngsters.
I can't afford lemons
I don't want to get married, I don't know why they need a life partner. Just live alone and grow and earn money and after earning enjoy and then go to mountain and be a sanyaasi
❤❤❤❤❤
I love how the video is structured i didn't even realise when 7 minutes passed
well I'm a million years old and i still can marry, how cool is that lol
Depends on mental maturity - maybe you could not be your mature-best within that window, but chronological age is a BIG factor - can't ignore nature doing its thing on our bodies - so he's right to an extent - but I would put that window at 27-30 for boys & 25-28 for girls. Again its personal, so Varun hit maturity in earlier twenties, his window is lower, for me that spot came later hence the higher window
a man hits his peak financially and physically after 30, while women peak in late teens, how is it fair for a man to get married before he hits his peak
Thanks, got my answer. Being a 20 year old girl, now I know I got 4 more years to max out myself individually. 💪🏻
Varun Maya is a like a great big brother one can have
Didn’t expect this from u. U speak of India as if all Indians n Indian parents are the same! As an INTJ, you can see how all Indians behave differently. & I think different ppl mature at different ages & there’s no such thing as the right age for all. Not all parents put pressure, & not all ppl are ready, not all ppl’s pool is shrinking, in metros the pool is large & active well into their 30s. Professions, education, life situations, diseases, & personal baggage can impact such life decisions and some ppl getting married at 25 can be divorced by 28. There’s NO SUCH THING AS THE RIGHT AGE TO MARRY. 20-45 is the sweet spot!
1. 16personalities./myers briggs is pseudoscience, don't judge people based on it.
2. It's not about all, it's about what % of people. He said many times that if your situation is an exception this doesn't apply to you but to the average Indian it still very much does apply to him/her.
3. Metros are huge places, what you are pointing to only applies to certain posh neighbourhoods not entire cities. A native kanadda living in the older parts of bangalore is not much different than a kanadda guy living elsewhere in karnataka. same with all other metros and the metros themselves are just 4 cities not the entire country.
4. People can marry at 25 and divorce at 28, sure but what is their divorce rate? In India the divorce rate is 1% and 1% chance of divorce is a pretty good gamble to play.
Thank you for pointing out this. Nowadays increasingly more people are getting open to marrying after 30, so no, marrying after 30 is not impossible. Also life's not as general, simple and straightforward as doing sum maths.
Also, early Indian marriages are more beneficial for men than women. Patriarchy is pure evil!
Get out of the mbti bubble bro
Well he said there are exceptions to his point as well.
He is saying that generally the marriage situation is what he has talked in this video.
Makes sense when it comes from a person of the same generation.
You are correct right after I turned 25 this year i started to look at life, goals,self-care a bit differently than before and this experience in itself matured me soo much
Never marry. If you want freedom
@@trueword4971 ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
@@trueword4971 exactly.
I'm 33 and I have more 'leads' than ever.
There's a growing pool of boys and girls above 30 who've never married, keep themselves groomed and fit, establish/switch to a soul-fulfilling career, falling in love with themselves first and are ready to wait for the right one.
Pretty skewed video tbh, Indian mentality is evolving at a rapid pace.
This calms my mind
I'm married on 18 and It's Love Marriage and Now I'm 21 and I'm Happy Enough...!
Outlier here: Corporate professional and married for love at 33, while I've dated throughout my 20s and didn't even consider marriage till i found the right person (at 30). Further, I do take care of my health/diet and most people cant tell me apart from a 25-26 year old. I plan to have no kids and so does my wife. Essentially it all depends on what you want from your life and your partner. But most important factor is that you take care of yourself first.
then get a house nearby hospital ,and get yourself a driver
@@muksgce If you live in Canada, this video does not apply to you.
Probability-
Larger the pool More the probability of finding a good match easily and quickly.
25 and getting married in an other 3 months, this video made me feel that I made right decision!!
He is telling the truth my uncle is now 39 and still not married , we were searching girls sice last 9 years but once you hit 30 you will find girls who had divorce or who are windows and life is to short we dont know what can happen tomorrow waiting till 28 is still okay but waiting till 30 is dangerous. Think practically because everything needs balance if any thing gets extra the balance breaks .
totally agree with you brother. For me, it is a senseless idea that there is not a right time to marry. 25 to 27 is definitely a right time.
I agree with Varun, U can only get lucky if u make an attempt to get lucky. Luck happens when oppurtunity meets preparation.
How simply you explained this!
I really liked your concept! I think the same that 25-27 is the best age to get married.👏🏻😊
That's some hard core reality !
Every word of this video is agreeable ..🙌
Agree with you Varun 🙌
Loved this video. Truth is spoken 💯
Great analysis...you have studied indian mentality in Society really good..🙌
Upto 25 we are on in student mode 😎
There is a clear distinction between how I was when I was 22 in college vs how I am now working 24. I am still in that fun loving adventure loving dude who if given chance will take bike at 3AM and drive insanely fast in the middle of street without any reason. I would be doing that in college as well but now when I think of doing that same thing I will be more careful about my responsibilities. I am more mature yet same level of kiddish as I was in college.
Nich insights well, i probably believe that getting married is one of the biggest descision you make , so just keep in mind and ask youself
1) Are you able to provide good, and happy conditions.
2) Are you the right person for right person.
3) what if you would started to get conflict into.
4) will you be the first person, who will take a step to talk to in conflicting days......
When did you find your wife and after how much of time spending you decided to get married?
I'd say that it depends on when you find your person, and when you can be financially independent. People, do not let your parents pay for your wedding.
What if someone *DON'T* want to get married ? now, I'd love to hear your perspective on that.
what's the plan when u are 60 then ?
have nurses ? no kids ?
If you dont want to, dont bro, simple. The point is to not regret the decision.
@@TheMsnitish have enough to afford nurses tbh
You think kids are a good retirement plan? I've seen alot of ugly shit happen.
More often than not, you become a burden to them, makes sense evolutionary as well.
They become solely focused on their offspring and their lives.
"your parents are not your bank and your children are not your retirement plan"
@@Effyeah agree!
I highly recommend to any Indian parents watching this video to understand what Varun has put. This is totally worth sharing. Great job, Varun Mayya ❤️
Actually this is true for girls only(not only because of all the above reasons but also women are most fertile and healthy at this age). Because guys at age 27-30 arent considered that old. Arrange marriage works for them where girl is 2-7 years younger than them. Marriage is scary honestly coming from a toxic parent household and seeing that i am running out of time and i haven't found someone yet scares me more.
for girls this age is 21 to 24 even below
why worry theres a whole lot of career/goal oriented girl who married at 30 and above......
for example see female celebrities , see female officers,female lawyers, female doctors and many more......
@@toyota7310 not true....from just considering biological point of view you can't make this assumption.....you have to consider career,financial,social and psychological point of view as well.....which makes it above 25 for girls who are single or have boyfriends of same age......
@@brokengenius315 i know man😂 i just put society norms bro . I 200% agree with you .
It would not make sense to marry guys older that 2-3 years because women outlive men generally by 5 years, they would be widows in their 50s and 60s
This was tooooo logical..marriage should not be such an empirically grounded and mathematical decision imo ....😉..
I got a marriage proposal last year , I had lost my father 6 years ago so my mother got insecure when a good rich family proposal came but I am also born brave, I started crying 😂, my mother always had a soft spot for me (second child- her permanent chhota bachha) so she said no and told me to focus on my career. I don't think the concept of marriage is for me but I completely understand what you're sayin, in the last few years I've realised that whatever our parents told us was in view of reality, we were the ones thinking life was a smooth slide on a rainbow.
Same condition as yours (father and being a middle child) .But maybe because I'm a boy there is a barrier between me and my mom.Coz I live with her and the other two out of the station .I am her lab rat from house paint to veggie everything is tested by me.And when something goes wrong get taunts too.But the thing is after my elder sis married everyone was in a hurry for me.And relatives started approaching .Yeah, make him marry.I heard it and said to my mother that I will marry but I need some years.To which she asked me to be clear .I said at the age in which my sis married.She happily agreed.So I am enjoying my bachelor life .....
I can relate with you a bit.. And the last line is a truth bomb. 💯
@@tintintintin576 Whom are you saying this to?BTW
@@AwwhishekGupta-gm8wi I replied to Rakshita, however I can relate with you a lil when it comes to being a "lab rat". 😅😅🤧
In my case, I'm the eldest one at home, the "first child", although they pampered me quite a lot, however I feel that people close to me experimented with me quite a lot. Maybe it's not their fault too, I was/am the their first child, and they became parents for the first time, had to deal with my various life stages without any prior experience, so yeah.
Exactly, same here. We don't have to follow some society rats race by some developed flesh. They're gonna die one day, I'm gonna die. And nothing will matter after a point. Why not we live for ourselves and enjoy in our own rules?
Bruh I'm already 22 with no money or job. This gives me chills
1.42 billion population hain. Job easily nhi milega.
America aur Europe ko milake bhi india se kam population hain. Isshilye baccha paida karna aur apne baccho ko saath julum karna ek jessa hain.
28-30 is age limit to get job
So there are many options at 22 or 25 to get job
I am 32 and still unmarried , not a single person I have ever dated.
Shi kar rahe ho, kisi pe trust krne ka sense hi ni bnta aajkl.
@@hiteshpal1689 Belive in your self bro . That's it ! I can say.
Age 22-25 you are focusing on growing and on the move..you can't make long term friends.
I literally got panic attacks after watching this 😅 (I'm f*ing 26 already)
Then realised that he might have read "Defining decade" by Meg Jay😁
Start hitting the gym as soon as possible and do facial exercises to make it look attractive-
Will certainly boost your attractiveness in a year or 2. Good luck my man!
i feel exactly same😂
cost of living sucks bro and telling to marry it's a disaster if you come from middle class . early marriages were there in olden times cause life expectecy was low in india as 35 years in 1950 before it's even lower. It's a personal choice not mandatory.
thank you for making this video. its really really good. i needed this to know
Brother, you literally changed my perception towards marriages from right now...😧😧
Ok so let me be a lil detailed and elaborative while making few additions to what he said.
See, whn we r young, we r still developing, enduring many ideologies, believes, principles and philosophies. We r in a way moulding ourselves to whatever we see n experience.
But as we grow older/aged these very believes, ideologies gets rigid and shapes us. Creating fixed,strong personality.
And now when ppl marry late, two very strong personality who've grown a certain way, it becomes significantly dificult to change or mould/bend them.
On contrary if u marry early, u'r still in the process of gloming, growing and both ppls final personality gets formed in each other's presence, complementing each other for life and growing TOGETHER.
Eg my frnd and i have grown since 5 years together. And now we have almost exact same personality, hopes, expectations, qualities, likes, believes etc.
Lst moment pe..jldi ghai me shaadi krne se behtr I would start early, find early understand him earlier n would have a lot of time to decide upon.
Btw.. thoughts are inspired by salil jamdar.
But What If you both don't grow together at a similar speed. Because each human has their own speed of growing.
so many people saying so many in comments. this is The perfect perspective yet. that's why getting married early with decent enough partner is beneficial, both grow together.
First time i disagree with your video never get married never fall in love cause legends don't fall they get up by not committing the same mistakes
wtf bro
Interesting, but you've not factored in COVID which has practically taken away a couple of years from everyone's lives !!
I just feel that It's better to get married before you turn 30 and the range should be 26-29. A person most probably gets financially capable and is mature enough to take important decisions of his life until he reaches 27-28.
The best content period .
It is at "WHEN YOU KNOW YOU ARE READY AND YOU FIND A RIGHT PARTNER" age.
You could have stuck to a single topic and talked about the facts psychologocal facts. The video had neither. The video was all about your opinion.
I'm 23 and afraid the window is going to close soon. Really don't want my parents to find somebody for me. Save me somebody here.
Didn't expect such a narrow old school mindset from you Varun.. glad I watched this video now so that I'm aware of what kind of perspectives you have when I watch your other videos..
Gosh I can't believe I've been following your videos since very long but didn't know you are married. Sir put a ring on you finger!
i am Rajasthani bro ,I am 20 years old and just celebrated my 18th marriage anniversary
Congratulations
Wtf
In my personal opinion, first, marriage is every individual's personal choice not an obligation.
Also, boy or girl, dont marry before you are properly financially independent and don't marry before 28, be it you are a girl or a boy, wait atleast till 28.
Also, marry someone who is around you age. Age gap relationship are gross and more likely to have Power imbalance and abusive.
Marriage should be a union, a mutually respectfull and mutually loving Partnership of Equals. Basically, Your life partner should be your best friend.
What about the people who don't want to marry ??? Is it necessary???
Naa just chill and have fun
@@halocraze9839 yes great plan 😁
@@bamasutradhar221 just make sure u don't regret ur decision later. U might find ur self in a situation where u don't have anyone to share ur happiness with
@@asifmgks4302 I can understand what you want to say, and thank you for the advice 😄
But i still don't hv anyone, i never had, so I'm already used to it 😄. Whenever i had they just used me
Its hard to find someone who understands u, and staying single is better then marry a wrong person.
My friends sometimes regret their marriage.
@@bamasutradhar221 Best of Luck
This is true everywhere not only in India. I'm 26 now and I look at a potential wife material woman and she shows her colours after 3rd day of dating. It's not gender specific but marrying at or between 25-27 would be difficult now more than ever in our current situation. People want more than what could be offered and this is a problem no parent or marrying parties can overcome. It's not insecurities if you're a forward thinker(Grown up).