I feel like crying hearing this ive been throught alot of bullying in my life it destroyed my life some people who teacy karate would just throw technequies at you but will never tell you how to deal with a bully
Sorry to hear this. Hope you are ok nowadays. I believe that it is an important part of self defence. Physical defence, yes of course, as a priority, but psychological too. Strong body, strong mind 💪🏻
Thank you. Very helpful. I am having anxiety going to work tonight as my bully is in charge tonight. He will be dumping me with most work after first giving me silent treatment when he sees me. I still pull up courage to greet him when I see him cos if I ignore him like he does it will be a difficult shift for me. I believe in karma and he will pay for it in a bad way and that time I won’t be there for him to apologise to.
Hi Sana, I am glad the video was helpful and I am sorry to hear that you are going through this. The meaning of your name Sana in Turkish is “to you” Remember that the mistreating done is done to you. So the answer has to come from you. Also we use the word Karma wrongly as a universal force that ensures what goes around comes around. The true meaning of the word Karma in Sanskrit is ‘Action’ So take action (true karma) to sort out the problems you are facing instead of delegating it to universal forces 🙂
I’m kinda nervous about my first class today. I know everyone starts somewhere but I’m not too sure what to expect, these videos are helping me mentally prepare a lot better. Thank you
Absolutely correct advice here. Its not a problem in my life now, but thinking back to school bullies it makes me wish I'd handled things better then. But nothing happens in a vacuum and the bullies of course had their own worries to want to lash out. The human trauma cycle is very unfortunate... Appreciate you making content man
Hello sir, thanks for the video In college, some people call me names because I dont know their ladon'tge...mostly i ignore them, but whenever I pass by him, he always calls me that name...always
Hi Hari How are you? My pleasure, I hope it helps. You can call him names in your language and just keep walking 🙂 But be always be prepared for escalation. Do some physical training. Level up 💪🏻
Thank you for this video,. I teach Social Skills classes. and the students with autism or anxiety make really great targets, II'm also working with the kids that are bullying to make them understand that people's brains work differently and we need to respect that. They take autism stimming to be a bad thing towards them.
My pleasure. Thanks for watching 👍🏻 Unfortunately I see examples of what you have mentioned often. Keep up the good work. If you need any help you can contact me. I will be happy to help.
This is my first time being actually bullied by almost my whole grade (i’ve always been somewhat bullied for being more unintelligent than the rest and for being obese). I am having a panic attack in the toilet stall right now, please pray for me
A boy in my college is always bullying me. He just suddenly comes to me in any intervel and starts arguing and degrading me by irritating talks.if I get angry, he shouts louder than me and creates a seen.or if I get angry he suddenly says thing's to degrade my ego and self-esteem.he is making others also to think they can disrespect me.im sad that I can't stand up for me
Isn’t it interesting that while decent people try to avoid making a scene and live a peaceful life, some people don’t mind it at all or even enjoy it. Don’t take the abuse. Stand up for yourself.
Thank you a lot for this video! I will definitely try applying this to real life. I have a question though. what do i do if the bully is a friend that I cant just say "maybe" and walk away? I always considered myself capable of dealing with physical and verbal abuse very well. usually helping others too. it's just hard for me to deal with this situation because he's a friend. It's been going on for a while... I've probably tried every single thing on that list... if anyone has a suggestion I would really appreciate it.
Hi, hope you are ok. Glad you like the video. For me the definition of a friend, is someone who is a major part of your support group, who helps you endure the difficulties of life. If “the friend” is the one causing the difficulty, than that person is not a real friend. What kind of a friend bullies? The solution is simple. Talk to them and explain how you feel, and if they do not change, sack that person from the friend position and find better friends 🙂 There are billions of people in the world. Lots of options. We are not limited to one person 💪🏻
They are all great tactics. However I find that not responding at all as if the person doesn’t even exist is the best method for me. The good old silent treatment and cutting them off and out permanently for eternity is so effective. I don’t tolerate any bad behaviour from anyone. I don’t except apologies either. I have Ghosted family that have crossed the line with me and any one who even looks at me the wrong way is gone for life. I don’t help my enemies either. They are gone ghosted and forgotten. There is a lot of force and power in ghosting and silence. Walking away is another powerful rejection that works for me. 😇🇦🇺🌟
Hi Dianne Thanks for your comment. Yes, I agree, if possible, disengaging is the best way. Life is too short and tranquility is important. So if you cant make a person happy with your presence, you can make them and yourself happy with your absence. The issue is that unfortunately it isn’t always possible to disengage totally. Sometimes it is a person at school or work, or even at home that causes the issue. And silence is sometimes seen as weakness and it increases the dose and changes the type of the bullying. It is a complex subject. The balance between disengaging and standing up for your self and engaging strongly can be difficult to find.
What should I do, in the situation when there's some guy that keep saying an embarrassed word to me couple of time, then, I started to defend my self by saying couple of words to kill the conversation like you said in the video, but this person respond by asking me, what do you get offended, do I want a fight. What should I do?
Hi Thomas, hope you are ok. Thanks for your comment. You can get to a level of physical skill, where it is difficult to pick a fight with you. Please watch the physical bullying video. ruclips.net/video/x4JQGBt3Jsw/видео.html
i have a lot of beef with some of my ex- friends and i’m try’s not to find ways to not try and do anything and maybe start a fight im not gonna be the person to swing first
Hi Try diplomacy to the best of your ability, if that doesn’t work then disengage and keep distance. Make sure you are not the one who starts the physical altercation, but train hard so are the one who finishes it.
Thank you for this I get bullied at school because I’m a girl who wears trousers at school. There is nothing to it I just find them more comfortable than a skirt and I don’t understand why it is wrong (to these bullies) for me to wear trousers in school but right for them to wear trousers outside of school.
Hi Josie Hope you are ok. The trousers are just an excuse for the pressure. Clothing is not the reason, it is the avenue through which the pressure is applied on you. Don’t conform. Wear what you want. Because if you did whats asked of you and changed, they will find another reason to continue.
Hi Hope you are ok If you disengage from verbal bullying by walking away and the bully starts following you, don’t allow them to walk right behind you. Because if they decide to turn it into physical bullying, you will be in a very vulnerable position. The only reason someone would follow a person and continue harassing them like this is because they believe that there are no consequences to their actions. If someone is comfortable making you uncomfortable, they might not stop doing it. I will be honest with you. Some problems don’t have quick fix answers. Get to the physical skill and confidence level where you can say “don’t take my peaceful nature for weakness, this nonsense stops now” in a tone and posture that makes it clear that following you is a terrible idea. The respect that is not given to you to start with can be earned.
Great advice; how would you deal with a Boss that bully's you into doing what he wants and doesn't take no for an answer? Putting you under massive stress
Thanks Stephen. Hope you are ok. If it is a small business you work for, you deal with it by leaving the position and becoming a direct competitor to them through opening your own business and kicking butt at an epic level. Learning from your bosses mistakes and creating the opposite environment where people love to work for you. If it is a big corporation, by finding a job in a better environment. Sometimes when you have a mortgage/rent and kids etc, you feel stuck with no choice and take the abuse, just not to rock the boat. But life is too short for feeling this way. If the first 2 options are not available, another 1000 is out there. Anyone can change profession, field, company, career, life direction anytime. Don't feel stuck. Having options is paramount. When we feel we don't have options we settle for bad bosses, bad co workers, bad partners, bad neighborhoods etc.
@@ShuhariSelfDefence Thank you so much for taking the time to reply. Wow what advice! This could be a massive coincidence (if you believe in them), but today I had an interview ( on a self employed basis) to work for a new company (really nice chap). My existing boss today gave me good feedback on my work, then proceeded to blame me for an episode that happened months ago (that actually wasn't my fault!). In doing this he has helped firm up my decision and I will be handing in my notice tomorrow! Here's to the future! a bit scary and a step into the unknown but...here goes!
@@ShuhariSelfDefence Hi there. Thanks for the reply . An update on my progress: I'm really busy, working for a great company and loving every minute of my new position in life! The stress and anxiety of the past has completely melted away and is now a thing of the past. All the best!
Hey Teacher Olgun! This vid is one in a million. So much good information. Loved how you explained :) Thank you so much for making this topic fully understood! I have a situation. for example: if someone passes by you saying hello. And just after hearing “hello” your reflexes greets that person back saying “hello”, but after that you notice that person was showing a middle finger too. how would you have responded to that?
Hi Aruliya Hope you are ok. Thanks for the feedback. I am glad you like the video. How do you treat a pot hole on the road when you are driving? You avoid it. If someone is being rude for no reason, you can chose avoid them. Next time they say hello, you ignore them and keep walking. Don’t play the game. Refuse to interact on principle.
Hello shuhari I stand up against an elder old guy that bullies and makes fun of people for trying to bring cool ideas to help the community out and when other members are around he puts on a show like he is a nice guy but when other members have left than he starts bullying and making fun of people ideas again I almost want to say something, but it’s my word against his I’d be disrespecting a elder person
Hi Jason, hope you are ok. I don’t know the details of your situation so I can’t comment accurately without the information. But know that unfortunately, years lived doesn’t always equal wisdom gained. “Respect the elderly” means respect the experience and wisdom of an elderly person. It doesn’t mean the person with the oldest date on their birth certificate in the room is always right. If an elderly person is enjoying the natural respect given to them because of their age, then the weight of living up to that respect should be on their shoulders. Hope you survive the age old, clash of generations.
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I feel like crying hearing this ive been throught alot of bullying in my life it destroyed my life some people who teacy karate would just throw technequies at you but will never tell you how to deal with a bully
Sorry to hear this. Hope you are ok nowadays. I believe that it is an important part of self defence. Physical defence, yes of course, as a priority, but psychological too.
Strong body, strong mind 💪🏻
so good advice! this kind of advice should be everywhere on books and internet!
Thank you for the kind words. I am glad that you have liked the video.
Thank you. Very helpful. I am having anxiety going to work tonight as my bully is in charge tonight. He will be dumping me with most work after first giving me silent treatment when he sees me. I still pull up courage to greet him when I see him cos if I ignore him like he does it will be a difficult shift for me. I believe in karma and he will pay for it in a bad way and that time I won’t be there for him to apologise to.
Hi Sana, I am glad the video was helpful and
I am sorry to hear that you are going through this.
The meaning of your name Sana in Turkish is “to you” Remember that the mistreating done is done to you. So the answer has to come from you.
Also we use the word Karma wrongly as a universal force that ensures what goes around comes around. The true meaning of the word Karma in Sanskrit is ‘Action’
So take action (true karma) to sort out the problems you are facing instead of delegating it to universal forces 🙂
I’m kinda nervous about my first class today. I know everyone starts somewhere but I’m not too sure what to expect, these videos are helping me mentally prepare a lot better. Thank you
Glad the video was helpful. Good luck with the first class 💪🏻
don't feed the bully! :) fantastic. great advice!
There should be signs 🚫🙂
Absolutely brilliant! Thank you so much ✅️💯 This advice is a life changing!
My pleasure. Glad it was helpful.
Great advice about engaging in a way that gives the bully no room for escalation.
Thank you Mark 👍🏻
Excellent advice, very important to show verbal bullies that their views are inconsequential to you.
Thank you 👍🏻
Absolutely correct advice here. Its not a problem in my life now, but thinking back to school bullies it makes me wish I'd handled things better then.
But nothing happens in a vacuum and the bullies of course had their own worries to want to lash out. The human trauma cycle is very unfortunate... Appreciate you making content man
Thank you.
I hope these videos will help some people who really need the information. You are right about the trauma cycle.
Definitely useful in an office environment, great watch!
Thank you Timothy, I am glad you found it useful.
Hello sir, thanks for the video
In college, some people call me names because I dont know their ladon'tge...mostly i ignore them, but whenever I pass by him, he always calls me that name...always
Hi Hari
How are you?
My pleasure, I hope it helps.
You can call him names in your language and just keep walking 🙂 But be always be prepared for escalation. Do some physical training. Level up 💪🏻
Great advice sensei. Daughters taking on the advice and applying in daily life 👍🏽
Glad it was helpful Rajiv.
Thank you for this video,. I teach Social Skills classes. and the students with autism or anxiety make really great targets, II'm also working with the kids that are bullying to make them understand that people's brains work differently and we need to respect that. They take autism stimming to be a bad thing towards them.
My pleasure. Thanks for watching 👍🏻
Unfortunately I see examples of what you have mentioned often.
Keep up the good work. If you need any help you can contact me. I will be happy to help.
Man I really needed to here this. Cheers man, this is great.
I am glad it helps 💪🏻
Extremely informative video , I will be applying these to my everyday life, thank you❤
Thank you Fasina 👍🏻
Great wisdom, thank you
Thanks Jake 👍🏻
Great video, and good advice. Worth a subscribe.
Thanks Ben 👍🏻
I appreciate it.
Really nice
Thank you 👍🏻
this is great content, thanks sir!
Glad you liked it 👍🏻
This is my first time being actually bullied by almost my whole grade (i’ve always been somewhat bullied for being more unintelligent than the rest and for being obese). I am having a panic attack in the toilet stall right now, please pray for me
Sorry to hear this. Stay strong.
You helped me a lot
My pleasure Shaheer 👍🏻
Excellent ! Thankyou so much
Its my pleasure 💪🏻
Great Advice and easy to follow! Thank You
Thanks for the feedback Thomas 💪🏻
Excellent advice
Thank you Simon
A boy in my college is always bullying me. He just suddenly comes to me in any intervel and starts arguing and degrading me by irritating talks.if I get angry, he shouts louder than me and creates a seen.or if I get angry he suddenly says thing's to degrade my ego and self-esteem.he is making others also to think they can disrespect me.im sad that I can't stand up for me
Isn’t it interesting that while decent people try to avoid making a scene and live a peaceful life, some people don’t mind it at all or even enjoy it. Don’t take the abuse. Stand up for yourself.
Thank you
My pleasure
thank you sensei, my friends, got bullied😊
Hope your friends are ok Tanvir 👍🏻
Brilliant tips, thanks.
My pleasure
Great tips thx a lot
Acv acv 👍🏻🙂
Perfect!!! 💪🏻✌🏻
💪🏻🙂
Thank you so much
My pleasure 👍🏻
Great advice! thank you !!
Thanks Beth 🙂 my pleasure
Oppose the structure of the conversation ... Very practical advise Sensei! #dojowisdom
Thank you
Thank you a lot for this video! I will definitely try applying this to real life. I have a question though. what do i do if the bully is a friend that I cant just say "maybe" and walk away? I always considered myself capable of dealing with physical and verbal abuse very well. usually helping others too. it's just hard for me to deal with this situation because he's a friend. It's been going on for a while... I've probably tried every single thing on that list... if anyone has a suggestion I would really appreciate it.
Hi, hope you are ok. Glad you like the video. For me the definition of a friend, is someone who is a major part of your support group, who helps you endure the difficulties of life. If “the friend” is the one causing the difficulty, than that person is not a real friend. What kind of a friend bullies? The solution is simple. Talk to them and explain how you feel, and if they do not change, sack that person from the friend position and find better friends 🙂 There are billions of people in the world. Lots of options. We are not limited to one person 💪🏻
They are all great tactics. However I find that not responding at all as if the person doesn’t even exist is the best method for me. The good old silent treatment and cutting them off and out permanently for eternity is so effective. I don’t tolerate any bad behaviour from anyone. I don’t except apologies either. I have Ghosted family that have crossed the line with me and any one who even looks at me the wrong way is gone for life. I don’t help my enemies either. They are gone ghosted and forgotten. There is a lot of force and power in ghosting and silence. Walking away is another powerful rejection that works for me. 😇🇦🇺🌟
Hi Dianne
Thanks for your comment.
Yes, I agree, if possible, disengaging is the best way. Life is too short and tranquility is important. So if you cant make a person happy with your presence, you can make them and yourself happy with your absence.
The issue is that unfortunately it isn’t always possible to disengage totally. Sometimes it is a person at school or work, or even at home that causes the issue. And silence is sometimes seen as weakness and it increases the dose and changes the type of the bullying.
It is a complex subject. The balance between disengaging and standing up for your self and engaging strongly can be difficult to find.
What should I do, in the situation when there's some guy that keep saying an embarrassed word to me couple of time, then, I started to defend my self by saying couple of words to kill the conversation like you said in the video, but this person respond by asking me, what do you get offended, do I want a fight. What should I do?
Hi Thomas, hope you are ok.
Thanks for your comment.
You can get to a level of physical skill, where it is difficult to pick a fight with you.
Please watch the physical bullying video.
ruclips.net/video/x4JQGBt3Jsw/видео.html
i have a lot of beef with some of my ex- friends and i’m try’s not to find ways to not try and do anything and maybe start a fight im not gonna be the person to swing first
Hi
Try diplomacy to the best of your ability, if that doesn’t work then disengage and keep distance.
Make sure you are not the one who starts the physical altercation, but train hard so are the one who finishes it.
Thank you for this I get bullied at school because I’m a girl who wears trousers at school. There is nothing to it I just find them more comfortable than a skirt and I don’t understand why it is wrong (to these bullies) for me to wear trousers in school but right for them to wear trousers outside of school.
Hi Josie
Hope you are ok. The trousers are just an excuse for the pressure. Clothing is not the reason, it is the avenue through which the pressure is applied on you. Don’t conform. Wear what you want. Because if you did whats asked of you and changed, they will find another reason to continue.
What do you do if after you disengage the bully starts to follow you and keeps instigating?
Hi
Hope you are ok
If you disengage from verbal bullying by walking away and the bully starts following you, don’t allow them to walk right behind you. Because if they decide to turn it into physical bullying, you will be in a very vulnerable position.
The only reason someone would follow a person and continue harassing them like this is because they believe that there are no consequences to their actions. If someone is comfortable making you uncomfortable, they might not stop doing it.
I will be honest with you. Some problems don’t have quick fix answers.
Get to the physical skill and confidence level where you can say “don’t take my peaceful nature for weakness, this nonsense stops now” in a tone and posture that makes it clear that following you is a terrible idea.
The respect that is not given to you to start with can be earned.
Great advice; how would you deal with a Boss that bully's you into doing what he wants and doesn't take no for an answer? Putting you under massive stress
Thanks Stephen. Hope you are ok.
If it is a small business you work for, you deal with it by leaving the position and becoming a direct competitor to them through opening your own business and kicking butt at an epic level. Learning from your bosses mistakes and creating the opposite environment where people love to work for you.
If it is a big corporation, by finding a job in a better environment.
Sometimes when you have a mortgage/rent and kids etc, you feel stuck with no choice and take the abuse, just not to rock the boat. But life is too short for feeling this way.
If the first 2 options are not available, another 1000 is out there. Anyone can change profession, field, company, career, life direction anytime. Don't feel stuck. Having options is paramount. When we feel we don't have options we settle for bad bosses, bad co workers, bad partners, bad neighborhoods etc.
@@ShuhariSelfDefence Thank you so much for taking the time to reply. Wow what advice! This could be a massive coincidence (if you believe in them), but today I had an interview ( on a self employed basis) to work for a new company (really nice chap). My existing boss today gave me good feedback on my work, then proceeded to blame me for an episode that happened months ago (that actually wasn't my fault!). In doing this he has helped firm up my decision and I will be handing in my notice tomorrow! Here's to the future! a bit scary and a step into the unknown but...here goes!
My pleasure. That is great news Stephen 💪🏻
@@ShuhariSelfDefence Hi there. Thanks for the reply . An update on my progress: I'm really busy, working for a great company and loving every minute of my new position in life! The stress and anxiety of the past has completely melted away and is now a thing of the past. All the best!
I am happy for you Stephen 💪🏻
Hey Teacher Olgun!
This vid is one in a million. So much good information. Loved how you explained :) Thank you so much for making this topic fully understood!
I have a situation.
for example:
if someone passes by you saying hello. And just after hearing “hello” your reflexes greets that person back saying “hello”, but after that you notice that person was showing a middle finger too.
how would you have responded to that?
Hi Aruliya
Hope you are ok. Thanks for the feedback. I am glad you like the video.
How do you treat a pot hole on the road when you are driving? You avoid it.
If someone is being rude for no reason, you can chose avoid them.
Next time they say hello, you ignore them and keep walking. Don’t play the game. Refuse to interact on principle.
Hello shuhari I stand up against an elder old guy that bullies and makes fun of people for trying to bring cool ideas to help the community out and when other members are around he puts on a show like he is a nice guy but when other members have left than he starts bullying and making fun of people ideas again I almost want to say something, but it’s my word against his I’d be disrespecting a elder person
Hi Jason, hope you are ok.
I don’t know the details of your situation so I can’t comment accurately without the information.
But know that unfortunately, years lived doesn’t always equal wisdom gained.
“Respect the elderly” means respect the experience and wisdom of an elderly person. It doesn’t mean the person with the oldest date on their birth certificate in the room is always right.
If an elderly person is enjoying the natural respect given to them because of their age, then the weight of living up to that respect should be on their shoulders.
Hope you survive the age old, clash of generations.
Someone made fun of me because I kissed my gf 😂
😀🤷🏻♂️