"do you think a great dad would neglect his kids for his lover?" no do you think a great lover would neglect the love of his life ? no you can't be a great dad and a great lover at the same time. simply put... don't date a single dad. period.
Exactly! The child will always come first, so by default us child free people will never be a top priority. We’ll only get their leftover time/when it’s convenient for them.
This is probably one of the most challenging issues in dating. That person might be the best thing to ever happen to you, but all the other issues will take center stage of the relationship 😢
@@Joy_M507 girl I know. Been with a guy that I’ve been going back and forth with for almost two years. I love him dearly, but there is a serious disconnect. It’s going to hurt me like hell to leave finally, but I honestly think it’s best for both of us.
@@ericortega1745 really so this the first time hearing a woman say she don’t have kids? So how can I make sense of the situation for you 🤣 if you have them and she have them good that’s why you haven’t met any women without them because we rather date men without them and I’m finally doing that now!
@@redbone8844 .I don't have kids with another woman. Can you do me a favor?. Do you have a cute cousin with out kids?. Preferably female between the age of 24 to 29?
@@ericortega1745Hello there okay you don’t have any it would be nice if I could see a profile picture of you I do have someone that don’t have kids that you may like
@LuckiestStarByFar Hopefully you checked out you will never be a priority especially if his kids small you’ll always be on the back burner waiting on him to free up some time just let him be a daddy and go and be happy with somebody on your level
I dont usually date men with kids and i have two but theyre adults and independant. I met an awesome guy but he has 3 teens. I finally got a chance to meet the two girls after 2months of dating and it went straight left. Theyre, controlling, manupilative, selfish entitled. And get this, he knew this and admitted after a few interactions but has zero control over them and set zero boundaries in his home when they visit. We tried living together in his place😮 i just bought my own house because i CANNOT tolerate other females running the home. There Can Only Be One Queen in the castle.
I’m going through that 😢 He won’t come to see me on thanksgiving like he said because of his kids. His kids are older 13 and 25 and do not have any communication with the daughters mom. However, still hurt and yes you nailed it with the info. Thank you ☺️
I'm currently in a relationship with a man who is 15 years my senior. I have no children and this is my first serious relationship. He has been divorced 10 years and has children ages 23, 19, and 16. The youngest lives with him part of the week. The 19 y.o. primarily lives with him and the 23 y.o. lives primarily with the mother. I still don't like the situation, because his kids don't clean up after themselves in the house. I would like a very clean and tidy house. I don't feel comfortable asking his kids to clean up. His two daughters have full-time jobs and still depend on him heavily for finances. After first three months of "wooing" me, I have been paying for most dates and outings. He started off treating me with gifts and nice dates, but now I'm paying 98% of the time. He's cheap with me (always saying he needs to save money), but spares no expense with his children. I'm not happy with this relationship especially since I've waited so long for a serious relationship and I came in with absolutely no baggage (not even emotional). He wants to get married, but I'm leaning on the side of getting out of this relationship. Although, his kids haven't been disrespectful to my face and seem to like me. I'm not feeling being some sort of stepmom even to adult children. His eldest is only 15 years younger than me. I'm at the stage where I could give myself 100% to a man, but a man with kids from another woman will never be 100% mine. I believe if I marry and have kids with him they will be at a lost, because they have to share their dad with step siblings. I never had to experience sharing a parent as I'm the only child of my parents who have been married 41 years.
LEAVE. I'm dating a guy with a 7yo daughter and although I have never ever spent a cent on anything since being with him Im still on the edge about continuing the relationship. I couldn't imagine paying like you are doing you deserve SO much better
I literally found the best man in the world, but he has a toddler daughter and first I was completely ok with that, so we started a serious relationship and even moved in together. But the more I get emotionally invested and attached to him the more the fact he has a child is KILLING me from inside. I absolutely hate the fact that he‘ll never be 100% with me and our potential kids. Not emotionally, not timewise, not financially. I hate that he has this eternal, permanent connection to another woman, even though they are not romantically involved anymore. I HATE it. Every time he has her (every 2 weeks) I‘m literally dying on the inside and feel like a complete outsider. „Papa‘s girlfriend“ that he fucks and pays bills 50/50. No commitment, no ring, no plans to have kids together, because „we can’t afford that“. Yet he has to pay custody for his own daughter from another woman 🤷🏻♀️ It hurts so much and I really don’t wanna leave him. But if this goes on like this, I will have to go, as painful as it is. P.S. also as a musician I have to move & travel a lot and he‘s not ready to move with me because he has his daughter here 🙄😫😤
This is good info. I just got out of my relationship with my ex because I realized that it wasn't for me. We do have a child together, but I never plan to date again, especially not another man with kids.
I agree kids comes first as they need us as parents to care for and guide them, but not completely on par with this and it can sound misleading. A relationship, a healthy one, is not when you make you partner feel abandoned for your kids. Nor is it that you never have time for them or can’t balance their lives. If they are doing this, then yes, don’t date THAT man with kids. Be sure they are not emotionally attaching to their children and mistaking them for playing a role of a spouse (emotionally speaking here),you will fall very low on that list. They are unavailable men. Just some insight for those thinking they shouldn’t be treated well or have a high priority while a man or woman is raising children. They also should be building a foundation of trust and unity if they are serious about having a relationship with you. Don’t date a man with kids if they are not mature and wise enough to navigate that or you will wind up feeling resentful and abandoned. It’s a very painful experience for partners and one that can make you feel guilty as someone should never make you feel like you are competing for their kids. A person that has given this some thought will communicate and make time for you and them (provides they are not solely alone)and time for you and them and the kids as you get closer and closer. You should also be willing to navigate children’s needs. There’s nothing better for a child than seeing a healthy unity between two adults that have their best interest at heart. If he is not cultivating this feeling in you but instead the feeling of resentment and like you are not important, or your feeling jealousy rather than getting closer to the kids, something is wrong and it’s not always you. Many times it is maturity and lack of emotional availability from the parent. Since these are their children, they should not be getting involved in a relationship until they have the space to give a partner and relationship what it needs to build.
I love your comment thank you 🙏🏾 you explained why I prefer to date a man without kids I can’t date a man with really small kids! He just don’t have time and I can respect that so I remove myself
You are not selfish my dear, you are normal. It is absolutely normal for woman to want having standart relationship where you and your man are the main priority for each other and where you both move toeards family. Women are nest-orientated and they want, can build tgeir own nest, not become a part of someon's broken nest and try to build something new on that ruins. Who are really selfish are divorced men with kids, who pull in the relationship a young, blossoming lady. He and her already ruined their previous family and he lives now on these fragments. He is unable not to fully be in the family, nor to break away from it. He is under constant supervision and control of the child's mother, he is in a huge dept for many years for other peoole. HE IS NOT A FREE MAN, even if he physically lives alone. By drawing a young and free girl into a relationship, he automatically makes her his mistress. He knows that he cannot give her a full-fledged relationship and normal family, but he does not care... He wants her body, regular sex, her energy, care and regular support. He will lie her anything to keep her in relationship, where he will give her 30% max, asking in return 100% from her. If she will say she wants more equal relationship, he will manipulate her with guilt, saying she is selfish and jelous "It's kids!!! You must understand. You are a woman". Man do this not for you to be happy, he does it only for himself and to keep you around and eat you. VERY selfish. Please, young ladies, if you are in love with man with kids, run away until it is not too late. No, he will not change. No, your case is not different. At the end of this relationship you will find yourslef exhausted, executive and broken, same as all of us who had this experience. Believe me, you can avoid it and find normal relationship with available man. Good luck for all of you. HUGS🤗
I'm a man with 3 kids who I'm very involved in there lives, and as a man I pledge Allegiance to all of my seeds so I honestly agree with all he says. I never plan to date again
You’re 100 right single women with no kids should never ever not ever date a baby daddy let alone take any male who has kids esp with multiple baby mommas seriously…he got lots of drama, limited $$$, and is going to b a complainer.
I m alredy suffering and i want to leave thos relatoonsjop coz i feel hatred to his son n ex wife all his money goes to them i nevr wnt to be thw secnd of abyones life i kno its hrd but more hard to livw tht wwy
I swear these pieces of shit would give all of their money to the children and then say " Oh it's they're need obviously they are my children and us women out of courtesy would keep our mouths shut just so that we don't sound selfish and greedy!
If you know you want your own family and when i say that i mean your own seed then dont date guys with kids alot if times they are obsessed with there baby momma and or wont have time for you which is fine it your a serious parent also i dont like teens either i dont want to deal with being someones step mom and the rudeness it also sometimes shows the guys state of mind like why is he not marrying who he impregnated or why does he sleep with women he sees no future with also men who have previously been married you have to wonder are they not a good husband or do they know how to be married like what made it not work
If you self-centered, only care about yourself then you shouldn’t have kids in general. Nothing wrong being in a relationship with a guy with kids especially if he taking care of his own otherwise. Same be said vise versa
Well alot of men dont date single moms so there should be no double standard men with kids can be seen as baggage just how they categorize us woman with kids as baggage
Wow! A woman is selfish when the prospect companion has her in the backseat? Just listening to your rationale is a waste of energy. Stay with your kids and don't expect someone to be entertained by you on your off days. You should be listening to your selfish self trying to impose your circumstances on any woman that respects herself and appreciates her life. Be happy with just your children. You aren't really available. That's the truth. And, of course, you only like those comments that agree with yours! Who needs gaslightning and drama in their lives? Good luck!
i recently broke of dating a man with kids. i knew going in that i would not be the top priority however i was very disappointed when i came to the realization that i’m not a priority at all. he would expect sexy time but not even offer to have a dinner date and just want sex. i had been celibate for six years childless not wanting to have children. i made a bad decision dating this single father of two and own it. will i ever date a man with children again? probably not. if i had children they would be in their twenties by now so that wouldn’t be an issue. when a man is raising children alone they don’t have any time for you but they have just enough time to knock you up so i say no way! i wouldn’t take that chance knowing i’m at the bottom of his priority list. not only that i offered to help him seek a higher paying job but he’s content with the low salary he struggles to make so absolutely not. if he wants a relationship with any women he has to make her feel that she is higher on his priority list and not just having random sex with her. 😢
Let me know your thoughts and don’t forget to contact me for your free 1 hour coaching session at lifecoachjscott@gmail.com
If you are thinking of leaving, leave. A single woman who has no kids, should be with someone with no kids.
"do you think a great dad would neglect his kids for his lover?" no
do you think a great lover would neglect the love of his life ? no
you can't be a great dad and a great lover at the same time.
simply put... don't date a single dad. period.
Exactly! The child will always come first, so by default us child free people will never be a top priority. We’ll only get their leftover time/when it’s convenient for them.
Don't date anyone with kids if you don't have any kids
This is probably one of the most challenging issues in dating. That person might be the best thing to ever happen to you, but all the other issues will take center stage of the relationship 😢
Going through this now! It’s a horrible feeling. 😔
@@Joy_M507 girl I know. Been with a guy that I’ve been going back and forth with for almost two years. I love him dearly, but there is a serious disconnect. It’s going to hurt me like hell to leave finally, but I honestly think it’s best for both of us.
because men do not have the ability to balance the two. trust me..dont do it
Thank you 🙏🏾 I left my situation you are so right and it seems like he was trying to make me step mother since he got a divorce 🏃♀️ 💨
It doesn't mean that I'm insecure if I don't want to date a man with young children or children who are still in school & be his priority.
I just broke up with a guy because he didn’t have time for me I felt so alone!! So I checked out and I don’t have any kids!
I have never met a woman without kids. Go figure.
@@ericortega1745 really so this the first time hearing a woman say she don’t have kids? So how can I make sense of the situation for you 🤣 if you have them and she have them good that’s why you haven’t met any women without them because we rather date men without them and I’m finally doing that now!
@@redbone8844 .I don't have kids with another woman. Can you do me a favor?. Do you have a cute cousin with out kids?. Preferably female between the age of 24 to 29?
@@ericortega1745Hello there okay you don’t have any it would be nice if I could see a profile picture of you I do have someone that don’t have kids that you may like
@LuckiestStarByFar Hopefully you checked out you will never be a priority especially if his kids small you’ll always be on the back burner waiting on him to free up some time just let him be a daddy and go and be happy with somebody on your level
I dont usually date men with kids and i have two but theyre adults and independant.
I met an awesome guy but he has 3 teens. I finally got a chance to meet the two girls after 2months of dating and it went straight left. Theyre, controlling, manupilative, selfish entitled.
And get this, he knew this and admitted after a few interactions but has zero control over them and set zero boundaries in his home when they visit.
We tried living together in his place😮 i just bought my own house because i CANNOT tolerate other females running the home.
There Can Only Be One Queen in the castle.
Even having your own kids is extremely hard and can end relationships
I can’t imagine sticking around for someone else’s kids to do that
So go date a single Mom. Why on earth would I center myself around a man's children?
Precisely
I’m going through that 😢
He won’t come to see me on thanksgiving like he said because of his kids. His kids are older 13 and 25 and do not have any communication with the daughters mom. However, still hurt and yes you nailed it with the info. Thank you ☺️
You are welcome. How long have you two been dating?
I'm currently in a relationship with a man who is 15 years my senior. I have no children and this is my first serious relationship. He has been divorced 10 years and has children ages 23, 19, and 16. The youngest lives with him part of the week. The 19 y.o. primarily lives with him and the 23 y.o. lives primarily with the mother. I still don't like the situation, because his kids don't clean up after themselves in the house. I would like a very clean and tidy house. I don't feel comfortable asking his kids to clean up. His two daughters have full-time jobs and still depend on him heavily for finances. After first three months of "wooing" me, I have been paying for most dates and outings. He started off treating me with gifts and nice dates, but now I'm paying 98% of the time. He's cheap with me (always saying he needs to save money), but spares no expense with his children. I'm not happy with this relationship especially since I've waited so long for a serious relationship and I came in with absolutely no baggage (not even emotional). He wants to get married, but I'm leaning on the side of getting out of this relationship. Although, his kids haven't been disrespectful to my face and seem to like me. I'm not feeling being some sort of stepmom even to adult children. His eldest is only 15 years younger than me. I'm at the stage where I could give myself 100% to a man, but a man with kids from another woman will never be 100% mine. I believe if I marry and have kids with him they will be at a lost, because they have to share their dad with step siblings. I never had to experience sharing a parent as I'm the only child of my parents who have been married 41 years.
Get out now! Don't waste your youth or time. You will never be a priority, no matter what!
He’s not for you. Stop wasting your time and money on him. You’re becoming his sugar momma.
Did you leave????
Not a good situation, you should date someone that can give you more time, effort and a clean home. Leave, trust me, I'm speaking from experience.
LEAVE. I'm dating a guy with a 7yo daughter and although I have never ever spent a cent on anything since being with him Im still on the edge about continuing the relationship. I couldn't imagine paying like you are doing you deserve SO much better
Why deal with it when you could not deal with it
So how would this relationship benefit a childlfree woman?
There are no benefits.
@@Lemons19902010 exactly 💯💯💯
There are no benefits. I'm speaking from experience. RUN.
This whole situation is just disgusting
I literally found the best man in the world, but he has a toddler daughter and first I was completely ok with that, so we started a serious relationship and even moved in together. But the more I get emotionally invested and attached to him the more the fact he has a child is KILLING me from inside. I absolutely hate the fact that he‘ll never be 100% with me and our potential kids. Not emotionally, not timewise, not financially. I hate that he has this eternal, permanent connection to another woman, even though they are not romantically involved anymore. I HATE it. Every time he has her (every 2 weeks) I‘m literally dying on the inside and feel like a complete outsider. „Papa‘s girlfriend“ that he fucks and pays bills 50/50. No commitment, no ring, no plans to have kids together, because „we can’t afford that“. Yet he has to pay custody for his own daughter from another woman 🤷🏻♀️
It hurts so much and I really don’t wanna leave him. But if this goes on like this, I will have to go, as painful as it is.
P.S. also as a musician I have to move & travel a lot and he‘s not ready to move with me because he has his daughter here 🙄😫😤
This won't get better and will cause you more distress in the future. Start your OWN family. You will have more peace of mind. Good luck!
I can relate to you so much! I can’t take it anymore and I have to leave.
This is good info. I just got out of my relationship with my ex because I realized that it wasn't for me. We do have a child together, but I never plan to date again, especially not another man with kids.
Why is this coming across as a dig at a single woman without kids.
This video actually made me fine to date a guy with kids. 😄 I like that this was targeting a woman's expectations and not punching down on a father.
I have a man with 5 kids and it's getting told of me sometimes I don't like it.Sometimes I don't want to deal with it though no I don't like it
I agree kids comes first as they need us as parents to care for and guide them, but not completely on par with this and it can sound misleading. A relationship, a healthy one, is not when you make you partner feel abandoned for your kids. Nor is it that you never have time for them or can’t balance their lives. If they are doing this, then yes, don’t date THAT man with kids. Be sure they are not emotionally attaching to their children and mistaking them for playing a role of a spouse (emotionally speaking here),you will fall very low on that list. They are unavailable men. Just some insight for those thinking they shouldn’t be treated well or have a high priority while a man or woman is raising children. They also should be building a foundation of trust and unity if they are serious about having a relationship with you. Don’t date a man with kids if they are not mature and wise enough to navigate that or you will wind up feeling resentful and abandoned. It’s a very painful experience for partners and one that can make you feel guilty as someone should never make you feel like you are competing for their kids. A person that has given this some thought will communicate and make time for you and them (provides they are not solely alone)and time for you and them and the kids as you get closer and closer. You should also be willing to navigate children’s needs. There’s nothing better for a child than seeing a healthy unity between two adults that have their best interest at heart. If he is not cultivating this feeling in you but instead the feeling of resentment and like you are not important, or your feeling jealousy rather than getting closer to the kids, something is wrong and it’s not always you. Many times it is maturity and lack of emotional availability from the parent. Since these are their children, they should not be getting involved in a relationship until they have the space to give a partner and relationship what it needs to build.
I love your comment thank you 🙏🏾 you explained why I prefer to date a man without kids I can’t date a man with really small kids! He just don’t have time and I can respect that so I remove myself
💯
Amazing message Thank you!
You are welcome and please let me know if I can help you with anything. Have you had struggles with this?
I guess i am selfish 😅😊😊😊
me too
You are not selfish my dear, you are normal. It is absolutely normal for woman to want having standart relationship where you and your man are the main priority for each other and where you both move toeards family. Women are nest-orientated and they want, can build tgeir own nest, not become a part of someon's broken nest and try to build something new on that ruins.
Who are really selfish are divorced men with kids, who pull in the relationship a young, blossoming lady. He and her already ruined their previous family and he lives now on these fragments. He is unable not to fully be in the family, nor to break away from it. He is under constant supervision and control of the child's mother, he is in a huge dept for many years for other peoole. HE IS NOT A FREE MAN, even if he physically lives alone. By drawing a young and free girl into a relationship, he automatically makes her his mistress. He knows that he cannot give her a full-fledged relationship and normal family, but he does not care... He wants her body, regular sex, her energy, care and regular support. He will lie her anything to keep her in relationship, where he will give her 30% max, asking in return 100% from her. If she will say she wants more equal relationship, he will manipulate her with guilt, saying she is selfish and jelous "It's kids!!! You must understand. You are a woman". Man do this not for you to be happy, he does it only for himself and to keep you around and eat you. VERY selfish.
Please, young ladies, if you are in love with man with kids, run away until it is not too late.
No, he will not change.
No, your case is not different.
At the end of this relationship you will find yourslef exhausted, executive and broken, same as all of us who had this experience. Believe me, you can avoid it and find normal relationship with available man.
Good luck for all of you. HUGS🤗
As am I
I'm a man with 3 kids who I'm very involved in there lives, and as a man I pledge Allegiance to all of my seeds so I honestly agree with all he says.
I never plan to date again
How old are your kids? I'd love to hear your perspective. How do you plan to take care of your "needs"?
@@Lemons19902010 most single dads still sleep with their baby mamas
So why not be with the mother of the kids? Was it that bad?
You’re 100 right single women with no kids
should never ever not ever date a baby daddy
let alone take any male who has kids esp with multiple baby mommas seriously…he got lots of drama, limited $$$, and is going to b a complainer.
I m alredy suffering and i want to leave thos relatoonsjop coz i feel hatred to his son n ex wife all his money goes to them i nevr wnt to be thw secnd of abyones life i kno its hrd but more hard to livw tht wwy
I swear these pieces of shit would give all of their money to the children and then say " Oh it's they're need obviously they are my children and us women out of courtesy would keep our mouths shut just so that we don't sound selfish and greedy!
The game change for me was alternating weeks with my ex
Every other week I'm 100% free to date and have wild weekends 😂❤
No. I won't date with kids.
Very informative video!
Thank You
@@JasonDScott You're very welcome!
Great video!
If you know you want your own family and when i say that i mean your own seed then dont date guys with kids alot if times they are obsessed with there baby momma and or wont have time for you which is fine it your a serious parent also i dont like teens either i dont want to deal with being someones step mom and the rudeness it also sometimes shows the guys state of mind like why is he not marrying who he impregnated or why does he sleep with women he sees no future with also men who have previously been married you have to wonder are they not a good husband or do they know how to be married like what made it not work
I like babies. After that I'm not sure
That makes sense - Have you ever dated someone with kids and if so, how did it go?
What about 18 and older but they still live at home?
Great question. Is this your current situation?
@@set_apart yes
Well it depends on the circumstances. We could always set up a time to talk what would be the best time and day for you?
@@set_apart No thanks!
Sounds worse
Yup
If you self-centered, only care about yourself then you shouldn’t have kids in general. Nothing wrong being in a relationship with a guy with kids especially if he taking care of his own otherwise. Same be said vise versa
People with kids should only date other people with kids and leave us alone
No thanks single dads need to leave childless women alone and date single moms.
Well alot of men dont date single moms so there should be no double standard men with kids can be seen as baggage just how they categorize us woman with kids as baggage
Wow! A woman is selfish when the prospect companion has her in the backseat? Just listening to your rationale is a waste of energy. Stay with your kids and don't expect someone to be entertained by you on your off days. You should be listening to your selfish self trying to impose your circumstances on any woman that respects herself and appreciates her life. Be happy with just your children. You aren't really available. That's the truth. And, of course, you only like those comments that agree with yours! Who needs gaslightning and drama in their lives? Good luck!
So.....who is a man with kids supposed to date? Other men? This is a very misleading message
Is safe to say that you have kids?
Date women who have kids!!!
A woman with kids. Why would a child free woman want to be bothered with a man with kids that don’t belong to her?
The baby momma you impregnated
@@plushplumes5328 hello somebody it’s that simple 🙌🏽
Think I’m bout to listen to a thick tongued simp
No clue what you’re talking about but apparently you did since you commented
Like the one who’s “beauty” can be wiped off with a towel has a relevant comment 🤡🤡🤡
You ain’t right 😂😂😂
@@JasonDScottthat's a baby daddy hiding behind a fake page. He's super hurt 😂
i recently broke of dating a man with kids. i knew going in that i would not be the top priority however i was very disappointed when i came to the realization that i’m not a priority at all. he would expect sexy time but not even offer to have a dinner date and just want sex. i had been celibate for six years childless not wanting to have children. i made a bad decision dating this single father of two and own it. will i ever date a man with children again? probably not. if i had children they would be in their twenties by now so that wouldn’t be an issue. when a man is raising children alone they don’t have any time for you but they have just enough time to knock you up so i say no way! i wouldn’t take that chance knowing i’m at the bottom of his priority list. not only that i offered to help him seek a higher paying job but he’s content with the low salary he struggles to make so absolutely not. if he wants a relationship with any women he has to make her feel that she is higher on his priority list and not just having random sex with her. 😢