How to Add to the Lives of Women You Sleep with! [Part 1/3]
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 24 сен 2024
- Part 2: • How to Change the Live...
Part 3: • Build an Epic Business...
▬ COACHING ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬
🤵 1-on-1 single coaching session with Andy (Let's crush your goals! $200): kyil-extra.com...
🏆 12-WEEK HARDCORE COACHING PROGRAM (payment plans available)
Come be part of our life-changing coaching program & dominate your goals - jump on a free call with me to discuss. Payment plans are available, you'll get LIFETIME access to our members-only community of other men & women who'll support you on your mission until the day you die. No more excuses - you deserve to be happy. Let me help make it happen: kyil-extra.com...
▬ Play to Win! (Video Course) ▬▬
😊 Here's EVERYTHING I learned going from depressed & suicidal to living a life of abundance & joy: playtowinminds...
▬ Socials ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬
🎙️ Podcast (more content): open.spotify.c...
Instagram: / killyourinnerloser
Tiktok: / killyourinnerloser
Twitter: / kyil_andy
![How to Change the Lives of People You Sleep with/Date [Part 2/3]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/PjJYlc7Wb3A/mqdefault.jpg)
You two are addressing topics in this space that don't get addressed very often, if at all. Love these videos. Please create more of these.
Will do, my friend.
I actually recorded another vid on this just now, thanks to your comment! It'll be on the channel in the next few days.
-Andy
This was great. I was hesitating to start dating for casual sex(it’s not something I’ve ever done before but want to) because I felt I wasn’t providing enough value because I can’t afford to take them out for dinner or dates; just coffee here and there. Different perspective on value I really appreciate. Shifted my perception on what I can offer outside of great sex because I do value connection. Exactly what I needed when I needed it ironically.
Write a list of a bunch of things you CAN offer! Write 20 things that are likeable about yourself (things you have to offer). A bunch to get you started:
- Offer them your smile. Mother Teresa said it best: "We never know all the good that can come from a simple smile"
- Offer them empathy/listening; you just giving a shit about what someone has to say is a big deal
- Go on fun dates; walk around parks, go Geocaching, etc (I've done videos on "how to make dating fun" and "what to talk about on dates")
- Share the cool, interesting parts of yourself (tell them about things that get you really excited and fired up, eg hobbies)
- Share your dreams/goals with them (you never know how much you inspire people by sharing what you're currently working on, and the struggles you've overcome, and the victories you've had)
- When you get to the point of being in the bedroom, share fun sex with them! You don't have to be good at it; great sex is literally just EXPERIMENTING with different things, being open to trying new things, and seeing what you both like.
- Being open-minded and non-judgemental about sex is something HUGE you have to offer
- Be honest and upfront; telling the truth is a HUGE thing you have to offer because not everyone is honest in dating (especially casual dating)
Now add more to the list; you can easily write 20 or so. Those are all the things you have to offer. AND, because you'll then be thinking about giving value and helping the other person (and yourself) have a great time, you'll naturally raise your standards and be with people who also give YOU value. "After all, if I'm giving all this value to people, I want to find people who add a lot to my life too".
If you want me to go even more in-depth with all of this, you're welcome to jump on a $200 coaching call anytime mate - kyil-extra.com/calls
Now go have fun!
-Andy
@@Andy_Wells thank you for this advice. putting it on paper makes it more real. And something you can look at here and there.
Hey Andy I keep deleting this and rewriting this but I'm going through a really hard time. Pretty much all that I have going for me is that I have a job in a factory that pays decently and might have a better job that uses my degree lined up (but it's far from certain). I've also been losing weight and can probably get to my goal weight in about two or three months at this point. At the same time, my social life is really bad. My only two best friends who I've known for years abandoned me which has left me entirely alone. I don't really have the best social skills or much knowledge of what people are talking about but I try to be friendly and positive while still being on the quiet side, but for the first time since high school which has been quite a few years, I'm actually kind of getting bullied. I think it probably goes without saying that there are no girls in the picture either. I think all of this is making me feel really bitter and hopeless. It does feel pointless to do anything at this stage. I usually just come home from work and scroll through the internet for a few hours and then go to sleep. For instance, I've been trying to get myself to watch a movie for the past few days and still haven't. I just get caught in the loop of, "I'm worthless to the people around me" ---> "I can't find any joy by myself". I have pretty much just been working, doing water fasts over the weekend, and surviving. I think mostly I just wanted to share that with you because I can tell that you're a genuine person that cares about other people and to thank you for that, but if I wanted to ask you anything particular, I think what I'm struggling with the most is figuring out what problem I should prioritize taking baby steps towards fixing in order to get out of this depressed state.
Hey man, I'll try offer a little advice but wanted to send some godspeed to you brother. For building a friend group I'd recommend doing activities that you enjoy or try at least something new once a month in the evening or weekend. But something outside your natural order of things and talk to one person whilst doing it. Could be bouldering, cooking, wine tasting, if you like anime go to an anime event etc. Then over time as you build up and meet people you can say a small "hey I really enjoyed hanging out with you, can I grab your contact as I'd love to hang out again". Also with the beliefs and thoughts you have about yourself, might be worth talking to someone like a coach or therapist. But all to say, people can meet you but only once you're there to be met so you will have to make the first move on this one. But I know you've got this dude! 25 baby steps can take you a long way so do small things often :)
My friend, look at your tremendous courage in posting all this! Wow, I'm in awe of you. So so good, my man.
If you haven't already, start with my depression guide (just search "Depression" on my youtube channel). That might show you at least that you're not alone. Then watch the interview I did with Thea (just search "Thea" on my channel) - she was depressed and I was essentially her therapist for 6 months.
Then - it might be time to stop playing on hard mode. Right now you're depressed; which means you don't have energy, or willpower, or motivation, to pull yourself higher and escape it. You literally don't have the energy or the motivation. So why are you trying to do it all yourself? Let other people help you brother, stop trying to be the lone wolf who does it all himself. You're playing on hard mode. No, screw that, you're playing on NIGHTMARE mode.
I did not overcome my depression by myself. If I'd been left to myself, I would have just ended it all. I needed both my parents, several therapists, most of my extended family, a doctor, and eventually a bunch of friends who cared about me in order to pull me out of depression. I was not capable of doing it alone; most depressed people are not. You simply don't have the energy, or the willpower, or even the desire to do it alone. So stop trying.
You've done such a tremendous job to get to this point - look at all the incredible stuff you've done. You have a job in a factory, while you're depressed! That's insanely amazing! Holy cow! You got a degree! You're losing weight! You try to be friendly and positive, despite feeling super low. My god man, you are AMAZING. You've done SO MUCH to get to this point; now it's time to let other people carry you a little further now. In other words, let other people help you; they want to.
Either hit up a therapist and get some help. Or join a group of people who'll lift you up (support groups, etc). Try to find people who've overcome depression themselves (or have helped other people do it, eg a therapist) - NOT people who are currently depressed themselves. Anyone who's currently depressed themselves will just drag you down (they won't mean to, but again, depression means you don't have energy or willpower or motivation - you already know that).
I'm more than happy to coach you, either 1-on-1 or in the group coaching. It might be nice for you to be surrounded by a bunch of people who'll be very non-judgemental, who'll help lift you up, who'll care about you, who'll encourage you, and who'll be very patient and loving with you on the days where you can't get out of bed. I don't know where you're at with money (you mentioned the job you have pays decent) - I'm very happy to lower the payment plan requirements if you need, and you can pay literally whatever you can comfortably afford each month. I - and the other coaches and clients - are very willing to help you. In fact, I genuinely enjoy helping people, in case you couldn't tell by the length of this reply ;)
So in summary - you've done AMAZING to get to the point you're at now. You've kept your head above water, and more than that, you've succeeded at so much! Holy cow, I'm in awe of your courage and your resilience and your ability to stick in there. And now it's time to let other people take some of that weight off your shoulders and help you - whether that's my coaching, or a therapist, or a support group of people who've overcome depression, etc. If you want my coaching, the link is in the description of all of my RUclips vids.
You've done amazing, my friend. Now it's time to let others help you.
@pb1687 - you're a legend for writing this out. Really great stuff. Thanks for being there for this guy in our community.
@@Andy_Wells I did read the depression guide and watched the Thea interview. Thank you for the long thought out response and for calling me resilient. I've been wanting somebody to see me as strong or resilient for such a long time but nobody has ever said that to me before. I'll give the recommendation for coaching or therapy some serious thought. I do appreciate you, Andy.