Myself. My self. That’s the problem. That’s the whole problem with the whole thing. That word, “self.” That’s not the word. That’s not right, that isn’t… That isn’t. How did I forget that? When did I forget that? The body stops, a cell at a time, but the brain keeps firing those neurons. Little lightning bolts, like fireworks inside, and I thought I’d despair or feel afraid, but I don’t feel any of that. None of it. Because I’m too busy. I’m too busy in this moment. Remembering. Of course. I remember that every atom in my body was forged in a star. This matter, this body is mostly just empty space after all, and solid matter? It’s just energy vibrating very slowly and there is no me. There never was. The electrons of my body mingle and dance with the electrons of the ground below me and the air I’m no longer breathing. And I remember, there is no point where any of that ends and I begin. I remember I am energy, not memory. Not self. My name, my personality, my choices, all came after me. I was before them, and I will be after, and everything else is pictures, picked up along the way. Fleeting little dreamlets, printed on the tissue of my dying brain. And I am the lightning that jumps between. I am the energy firing the neurons, and I’m returning. Just by remembering, I’m returning home. And it’s like a drop of water falling back into the ocean, of which it’s always been a part. All things…a part. All of us…a part. You and me. Everyone who’s ever been. Every plant, every animal, every atom, every star, every galaxy, all of it. More galaxies in the universe than grains of sand on the beach. And that is what we’re talking about when we say “God”. The one. The cosmos and its infinite dreams. We are the cosmos dreaming of itself. It’s simply a dream that I think is my life, every time. But I’ll forget this. I always do. I always forget my dreams. But now, in this split second, in this moment I remember, the instant I remember, I comprehend everything at once. There is no time. There is no death. Life is a dream. It’s a wish. Made again and again and again and again and again and again on into eternity. And I am all of it. I am everything. I am all. I am that I am. Just in case anyone else wants it written out ^
@@5quepasa No, you don't. You understand every word of it, but not the core of what the writer is trying to communicate, which is a common perception for some people who had practiced contemplation. I am an atheist, and I struggled for years to hear speeches or read texts like this one and not calling them gibberish, because that's what they look like. But there's something more behind, something that in time might be more accurately explained by science.
@@lugomat Please don't assume what I do and don't understand. I understand the core of the writer's statement. I reject it wholeheartedly however. To state that we are simply matter and energy, returning to the rest of matter and energy is neither profound nor true. To state that God is the universe and we are God is just pantheism, nothing new or interesting. A friend of mine heard this speech and called it bad Buddhism, though I would describe it as some religious studies major taking both Buddhism and Hinduism and putting them together into a worthless hodgepodge of ideas. Lastly, saying that something will someday be accurately explained by science is not a valid argument for its verity. I would simply say it's already a poetic statement on what bodily death is according to science. I love it when scientists (the religion, not the field (practitioners of scientism)) discuss philosophy because it proves the limits of their worldview.
@@5quepasa Everyone’s “worldview” is limited. Including that of conservative Christians, who, like many other religious groups, can so often be so sure of themselves. I say this as someone who grew up as a conservative Christian. You may roll your eyes at Erin’s reflections, but I think her speech here is perfect for her character. Earlier in the series, she reminds Riley that when they were kids, she was “the godless heathen” while he was the “good church boy,” poking fun at the irony of him turning out to be an atheist while she participates in communion. Her character was written to have always had a bit of that skeptical, “godless heathen” in her even as she believed in her Catholic faith as an adult. So it makes sense to me that in the moment of her actual death, when she is reflecting on all her conversations with Riley before he died, she would attempt to blend her Catholic beliefs here with the things Riley had been telling her. It’s why there is pantheism here in her speech. It’s why she takes “I am that I am” from Exodus 3:14 and applies it to herself and to the rest of the cosmos. Sure, it’s syncretistic. Sure, it’s pantheism. And that may be distasteful to you, and if so, that’s fine. You refer to it as “some religious studies major taking both Buddhism and Hinduism and putting them together into a worthless hodgepodge of ideas.” But what makes it a “worthless hodgepodge of ideas”? Why do you think that about it? What makes it “worthless” to you? I see this speech as a character trying to make sense of her connectedness to the cosmos in the moment of her impending death. It’s one thing to imagine how any of us may face the final curtain call of our brief lives on this planet, no matter how certain we may be in any of our religious beliefs. It’s another thing entirely to actually experience it. We never know for sure how our brains will attempt to comfort us in the final hour, what explanations we may reach for. We all are trying to explain the mystery of existence to ourselves in our own ways, and it’s not just limited to the ideas found in major world religions such as the Abrahamic faiths of Judaism, Christianity, or Islam, or Eastern religions such as Buddhism and Hinduism. No one knows for sure “what happens when we die,” despite what anyone may insist.
@@beccahawkins1905 I’ve explained why it’s worthless (not new or interesting, but most of all not true). At least those religions come to a conclusion on how to live, but this is just the literary equivalent of spitting into the wind. Perhaps I don’t know what happens when we die, but I know that whatever this show settled on was absolute bullshit. In any case, I just wanted those in this echo chamber to realize that though the ideas present here sound pretty, there is much that is contradictory about this expressed philosophy.
I have never been able to put my perspective about death into words but this scene just did. To be honest, I have never been moved as much by a monologue either. I can't even begin to explain how this moment made me feel ; peace - ease - tranquility - silence. This speech truly shook something inside me and to whoever wrote it, you did THAT. I will definitely be coming back to this.
I watched this last episode last night and I got goosebumps and shed some tears and felt so much more okay with death.. I’m going watch this scene a lot.
*Serious spoilers* **Very long post ahead** This is Erin's monologue. This is truly a monologue as the conversation in the scene never truly happens, it only takes place in Erin's mind in her last moments before death. Fitting, as her monologue essentially confirms Riley's agnostic and scientific approach to death, that memories and dreams all mash into one in the last moment of your death as your neurons fire simultaneously as if it's a final curtain call, a fireworks display. Giving you an experience of euphoria like you have never felt before. But what's interesting is she did not just conflate her position with that of Riley's on the meaning of death, she did not just take a purely scientific stance on death. She built upon it with a spiritual dimension, much more complex than the abrahamic spiritual dimension she displayed in the actual conversation that took place with Riley a couple of days prior. Her spiritual gloss over Riley's scientific approach to death seems like a pan-theistic reinterpretation of the abrahamic god, a sort of de-anthropomorphising of YHWH or Allah. A theological position that many modern Christians tend to lean towards in varying degrees. However, everything she said here in plain English is distilled from concepts central to the philosophy-religions of the Indian subcontinent, and a cursory check informs me that every western media have missed this nuanced reading of Erin's monologue. Let me elucidate: First she discusses the problem of the self. Abrahamic theology emphasises on the immutable self, that you, or atleast your soul is eternal. That you see yourself as distinct from another, good is distinct from evil, that God is sacred and distinct from impurities. Her rejection of the self is however a textbook illustration of the Mahayana concept of Anatta, the non-self. While the Anatta taught by Siddhartha may have been a simpler concept of not-self, the later Mahayana philosophers expanded the concept to mean non-self. This expansion is likely a Hindu re influence on Buddhism stemming from the concept of Brahman. Brahman stipulates that the central force of the universe is one, and that we are all part of that one, good or evil, sacred or unholy, gods or demons, we are all part of that whole. And this clearly shows in Erin recognising that "...there is no point where any of that ends, and I begin... I am energy, not memories, not self. My name, personality and choices all came after me, I was before them and I will be after, everything else is pictures picked up along the way, fleeting little dreamlets printed on the tissues of my dying brain, and I am the lighting that jumps between them..." This emphasis on the in between, that you are not your memory, you are not your actions and emotions, is again a deep Mahayana tradition, leading later Mahayana philosophers to eventually contemplate on the concept of Sunyata, emptiness, but more on that later. She then talks about being a drop of water returning to the ocean. This is a common metaphor used in Hindu Buddhist tradition. In Hinduism as a metaphor for Brahman, and the returning to the source of creation; in Buddhism to illustrate the concept of karma. Interestingly, her monologue took a modern spiritual turn, contemplating the meaning of life and the purpose of consciousness. She posits that we are the result of the cosmos trying to know itself. Every one of our consciousness a dream the cosmos is having of itself. The cosmos' way of experiencing the vastness of itself. As far as I am aware, no spiritual tradition took this interpretation until modern science points it's telescope towards the stars. Coming back to Mahayana concept of Sunyata, (emptiness) mentioned above, the next part of her speech alluded heavily towards this concept. One of the foremost work on this concept was found it the often chanted Prajna Paramita Hrdaya Sutra. Where the bodhisattva avalokitesvara seemingly instructs sariputra (a disciple of Siddhartha) on how to attain Prajna (the perfection of wisdom). Erin mentioned that she spontaneously realises that "...there is no time, there is no death, life is a dream." This is not only in the style of the Hrdaya Sutra, but it's also the central thesis of the sutra. That the world and this life is Maya (illusion) and to peel beyond the Maya then is to realise Prajna Paramita (perfection of wisdom) and that realisation is that everything is Sunyata (emptiness). That sight, sense, smell, taste, desires, memories, feelings, thought, even consciousness itself is not real. In the words of Erin, like a dream. And then she goes on to compare this consciousness functioning like a wish, a desire, and it comes back again, and again, and again and again. Needless to say, this alludes to the concept of rebirth in Buddhism or reincarnation in Hinduism. And the energy that drives this repetitive process is the desire, the Karma. Erin doesn't elaborate beyond this, indicating only that she has broken the spell of ignorance, realising that the cycle of rebirth/reincarnation goes on for an eternity, and that she is all of and, every rebirth. She is everything. Culminating in the final phrase "I am that I am" Her seeming neutrality to the cycle of rebirth is what sets her awakening apart from Hindu Buddhist traditions, which imply that this cycle causes suffering, and this suffering can and should be stopped. As far as I am informed, no one has explored this aspect of interpretation to Erin's monologue at time of writing.
I have been discussing the same with some of my friends as well. The monologue meshes together Erin (spiritual) and Riley's (scientific) interpretation of death from their conversation earlier and then goes on to subsume philosophical themes on Abrahmanic religions into non theistic consciousness based Hindu and Buddhist philosophy. It was a remarkable piece of writing!
This interpretation, or rather, this dissection of the monologue that the character “Erin Greene” delivers to us via the writers or writer is perfect… and I would rather not think of death any other way than this way. This is the perfect way to consider death as the next step.. to be okay with closing ones eyes and breathing a last breath for the last time. Poetically and with hope is how I have now decided to live last moments on earth.. and with that being unforeseen that means that I must live every day as such.. as if every day can and will be my last. Her speech really messed with my head in all the right ways.. and I truly commend the writers who came up with that monologue. Also, I am about to do extensive research on a lot of names you mentioned and beliefs mentioned in your assessment.. thank you very much. It does not go unnoticed.. I thank you for being so inclined in the realm of spiritual belief and religion. Thank you. 🙏
Thanks for writing this, Bo. You should write an article about this. It’s such a good dissection. I’d hate for it to only live in the comment section of a RUclips people. I want others to be able to search for and find this
Vedanta is the most ancient philosophy and in fact it created the backbone of Buddhism. What she says as "self" and the Self in Vedanta are two different things. She was basically emphasizing Ego Aka the "I" and spoke of it as the 'self'. Her profound realization of the drop returning to the ocean is indeed god-realization as stated in Bhagavad Gita. Thanks for this 🙏🏼 Namaskaram.
To be honest, this is where my faith is. This is more similar to how I view my faith. And now that it was translated into words, I am more enlightened to it? I can't explain it but I always thought that God itself is the universe and we are all just going to be part of it for infinity, just a cycle in the cosmos.
glad I'm not the only one. was really happy that a media just about described and blended my faith and love of science into a single thing which is fitting as religion was the progenitor of science, the first attempt at understanding the world around us, in a far more innocent view of the world when men still lived in caves
I was catholic, but my faith is always different, never understand and never can be explain clearly, and this is what I think about life, death, God, universe, faith, this text is so precious, because I've lost my father in June, and so hard, but this serie really helped me in my life, because hope❤️
This is how I felt my whole life. I cried when I watched this monologue tonight, because I was overwhelmed by the thought that others feel and believe the same way I do. Thank you ❤️
Thanks for posting this. I finished the series yesterday and this monologue is the heart of my perspective, an awesome summary of the Hermetic perennial philosophy that underlies most wisdom traditions.
This show was captivating and life changing. It is an experience. I watched in two days and it was beautiful and sad. In a good way. I really hope that it gets award recognition. The writing and acting especially
I teared up real good at this one. This is exactly what I have believed about life for so long. Life doesn’t have a meaning, or a purpose, it just happens. That’s what makes it beautiful. Life isn’t existing to serve an end purpose or to reach a goal, it is just the effect of the universe existing and energy moving within it, as a part of it. Parts of the universe have come together and formed into me through various processes that were also the result of different aspects of the universe combining. The way these parts have formed into me give me the feeling of something greater, create a consciousness. But consciousness is an illusion. It is just a bunch of different processes happening because of how different parts of the universe have collected into one unit. A time will come when they will separate again. All I am is a bunch of energy bumbling around and mingling, happening to cluster together for the moment that is human history, and that’s beautiful. This monologue says that we’re like drops in an ocean, but I think it’s more like we’re ice crystals. We form from the water that’s there, exist for a time, and then we’re water again when that time is done. The ice isn’t gone, it’s just returned back to what it was before it happened to become ice.
I showed my mom this show last month. She’s now gone. She passed away a little over a week ago. This monologue has seriously helped me get through this difficult time.
The most beautiful monologue I have ever heard, the writing, the delivery, absolute perfection. I am currently dealing with the inevitability of one of my parents departures, and this scene.. the timing for me it’s so perfect. Cannot express how much this scene has effected me and brought me peace, putting all my scrambled thoughts on death in order ❤️I wish I could hug the writers and Kate Seigal tell them thankyou
@@5quepasa What happens to us after we die is our own belief, and when something feels right and eases peoples existance on this plane, let it be. It is not hurting one person besides yourself obviously.
Without doubt the best monologue I've ever heard. The scripting, the delivery, it's just epic. I literally watch this every day and it puts my mind at ease, that there are people out there with the same views as myself about death.
This is breath taking...lol literally the first time I heard it it resonated so deeply with me I just sobbed quietly trying to catch my breath and still digest what she was saying... It's like when you hear a philosopher like Alan Watts' teachings and It completely blows your mind but it makes everything make sense at the same time and mends your heart because you understand someone else understands...perfect I am that I am
i teared up so much during her last monologue. It made me feel sad, empty, but also at peace. The finale of this show was good, but tragic and bittersweet
This scene made me cry..Kate Siegel dying while recalling the conversation, Monseigneur Pruitt carrying his dead daughter with his wife and Sheriff Hasan and his son dying after reciting the sunrise prayer.
What really awes me is that this is EXACTLY what DMT feels like. I've been through some rituals with ayahuasca and I've never been able to describe how it feels. This is it. It's also a throwback to her conversation with Riley, she's going through what he described - a DMT trip. But since she's living it while describing it is described in a more personal and sensitive way. Beautiful stuff!
We feel these things while on psychedelics for a reason I believe it is the universe revealing its true nature, like remembering our true origins for the first time again.
To think that the final scene in a way ties the definition of God to the Hindu concept of Brahman just wowed me. I didn't expect that at all. And they tied it into the Bible phrase, 'I am that I am', which has an almost similar equivalent in Hinduism- Tat Tvam Asi - "you are that", meaning you are what you seek, and another equivalent - Aham Brahmasmi - "I am divine". The interrelationship of the individual essence, Atman, with the larger, universal, omnipresent Divine called Brahman. When she says we are the universe looking and dreaming of itself, it's a reference to Advaita Vedanta, that we are living in a dream world called Maya, going through cycles of creation and destruction over and over again. Completely Hindu stuff!
TL;DW - "Everything wrong in my life inevitably resolves itself because I cannot be the problem. I'll adjust my beliefs anyway possible to believe that, no matter how unfounded it is. I'll even call myself God." Okay, Father Changstein El-Gamal.
I thought this was beautiful. I grasped this concept years ago doing Kundalini Yoga, but I forgot and I've been living in my mind for years. This brought me back to that understanding. Thanks for recording it.
These concepts are very familiar for psychonauts. Another person who talk about this kind of concepts is Jim Carrey, and he did it many times. Have you ever noticed?
@@robertwiley5918 and something simpler. No long-winded monologue, just a change in belief. It could have been expressed in one sentence. But it went on, and on. Less is more, in this situation.
@@stevenbatke4167 literally if she just spoke the words “I am that I am” as she was dying, that would’ve made for a more impactful and interpretable scene than this nonsense lol
It felt so tacked on too, and sort of a betrayal of what her character was set up to be. It’s like Flanagan smoked a j, marathoned a bunch of Bill Hicks specials and then watched Waking Life and had the bright idea to insert this bullshit into his horror show lol. I can’t believe people are eating this shit up, I was dying laughing at the end of it.
Just me but I thought this monologue was way too long. Nobody talks like that. The only monologues that I ever enjoyed were both from 25th hour, where they weren’t dragged out. I liked the monologues between Riley and father Paul, I could even withstand Bev’s (despite her being a horrible person/fantastic actress) but Erin’s one here is just boring.
This was my favorite monologue of the show, one of my favorites ever. But it’s because I connected so deeply to what she was saying. Because it’s how I already viewed existence. When someone can give voice to something you’ve never really put into words, it’s such a moving, life changing thing. But yeah no one talks like this. :)
@@nicsmall589 except for Alan Watts hahah but no one discusses abstract thought because no one is willing to truly listen the people who talk like this are speaking to no one most often only the ether catches the words muttered from those people
I think it might be boring if you don't vibe with what she is saying. To me it was very beautiful. But when the priest was having bible monologues I had to skip out of boredom, but a devout christian may have those parts are their favorites etc.
@@RnRnR that's probably very true. I've talked to several people about this show and I always bring up this particular monologue, and no one really has anything to say about it. I feel like either you really connect with it or you don't.
This is very coherent for people who have felt this exact feeling when doing psychedelics or lived through an NDE. This monologue spoke to me directly.
@@dbrandeau those experiences do not grasp reality, they escape it. Subjective experiences like the ones described are only that, subjective experiences. With no corresponding objective reality.
This is absolute hell, To come back over and over? If I lived in a setting like the movie Avatar then yes!! But what about a wicked world rulership where the elite control everyone except for their royal blood? And everyone else has no freedoms and are slaves? Would u wanna comeback to that? Also we are NOT GOD Someone created this process of life and essence and it wasnt ourselves so we CANNOT say “i am that i am” Also theres a plethora of things in the bible that have been proven… The statue of lots wife as a pillar of salt Noahs ark in mt ararat, exactly where it said it would be. Proof of giants and skeletons Sodom and gommorrah balls of sulfur next to jericho in the middleeast
One of the worst things I’ve ever heard spoken and such a betrayal of her character. What’s more, it’s so, so wrong from a metaphysical perspective. It made me regret watching this show. It’s odd that I found Riley’s death far more moving.
@@kthstefani She understood what exactly? That she is God, the universe is God? No, that is so meaningless as to be idiotic. God is “one” not “all”. One, by its metaphysical definition, can’t be divided and the universe is very clearly divided. You are not me and I am not you. Stars are not trees, etc, even if physically things came from the Big Bang. Her earlier description of death was far more profound because of the fact that our souls seek infinite happiness and therefore must be created for it. This necessarily means that such a destiny awaits us. For her character to go from a developed understanding of death to this mundane, almost polar opposite understanding in the course of two days is, yes, a betrayal of her character.
@@5quepasa I really don't know how to explain it to you. You're interpretation isn't mine and mine isn't yours. You may be right and I may be right. It can't be proven in any way.
@@kthstefani It boggles the mind that you really typed that and did not think for a second, “This is why I have a rational mind. Not to discover the mysteries of the world, but just so that I can say, ‘Well, that’s just your opinion, man. We can’t really know who’s right.’” I really hope this isn’t how you live because, frankly, it makes you seem spineless.
Myself. My self.
That’s the problem.
That’s the whole problem with the whole thing. That word, “self.”
That’s not the word. That’s not right, that isn’t… That isn’t. How did I forget that?
When did I forget that?
The body stops, a cell at a time, but the brain keeps firing those neurons. Little lightning bolts, like fireworks inside, and I thought I’d despair or feel afraid, but I don’t feel any of that.
None of it. Because I’m too busy.
I’m too busy in this moment. Remembering.
Of course.
I remember that every atom in my body was forged in a star. This matter, this body is mostly just empty space after all, and solid matter? It’s just energy vibrating very slowly and there is no me. There never was.
The electrons of my body mingle and dance with the electrons of the ground below me and the air I’m no longer breathing. And I remember, there is no point where any of that ends and I begin.
I remember I am energy, not memory.
Not self.
My name, my personality, my choices, all came after me. I was before them, and I will be after, and everything else is pictures, picked up along the way. Fleeting little dreamlets, printed on the tissue of my dying brain.
And I am the lightning that jumps between. I am the energy firing the neurons, and I’m returning. Just by remembering, I’m returning home.
And it’s like a drop of water falling back into the ocean, of which it’s always been a part.
All things…a part.
All of us…a part.
You and me. Everyone who’s ever been. Every plant, every animal, every atom, every star, every galaxy, all of it. More galaxies in the universe than grains of sand on the beach.
And that is what we’re talking about when we say “God”.
The one.
The cosmos and its infinite dreams.
We are the cosmos dreaming of itself.
It’s simply a dream that I think is my life, every time.
But I’ll forget this. I always do.
I always forget my dreams.
But now, in this split second, in this moment I remember, the instant I remember, I comprehend everything at once.
There is no time. There is no death.
Life is a dream.
It’s a wish.
Made again and again and again and again and again and again on into eternity.
And I am all of it.
I am everything. I am all.
I am that I am.
Just in case anyone else wants it written out ^
Thanks. ❤️
Thank you!!!
Thank you so much!
Thanks so much for the effort! ❤
I did, thanks!
Whoever wrote this scene gets it all. So refreshing to hear these words spoken to a large audience whether they understand it yet or not.
I understand it. I just think it’s stupid
@@5quepasa No, you don't. You understand every word of it, but not the core of what the writer is trying to communicate, which is a common perception for some people who had practiced contemplation. I am an atheist, and I struggled for years to hear speeches or read texts like this one and not calling them gibberish, because that's what they look like. But there's something more behind, something that in time might be more accurately explained by science.
@@lugomat Please don't assume what I do and don't understand. I understand the core of the writer's statement. I reject it wholeheartedly however. To state that we are simply matter and energy, returning to the rest of matter and energy is neither profound nor true. To state that God is the universe and we are God is just pantheism, nothing new or interesting. A friend of mine heard this speech and called it bad Buddhism, though I would describe it as some religious studies major taking both Buddhism and Hinduism and putting them together into a worthless hodgepodge of ideas. Lastly, saying that something will someday be accurately explained by science is not a valid argument for its verity. I would simply say it's already a poetic statement on what bodily death is according to science. I love it when scientists (the religion, not the field (practitioners of scientism)) discuss philosophy because it proves the limits of their worldview.
@@5quepasa Everyone’s “worldview” is limited. Including that of conservative Christians, who, like many other religious groups, can so often be so sure of themselves. I say this as someone who grew up as a conservative Christian.
You may roll your eyes at Erin’s reflections, but I think her speech here is perfect for her character. Earlier in the series, she reminds Riley that when they were kids, she was “the godless heathen” while he was the “good church boy,” poking fun at the irony of him turning out to be an atheist while she participates in communion.
Her character was written to have always had a bit of that skeptical, “godless heathen” in her even as she believed in her Catholic faith as an adult. So it makes sense to me that in the moment of her actual death, when she is reflecting on all her conversations with Riley before he died, she would attempt to blend her Catholic beliefs here with the things Riley had been telling her.
It’s why there is pantheism here in her speech. It’s why she takes “I am that I am” from Exodus 3:14 and applies it to herself and to the rest of the cosmos.
Sure, it’s syncretistic. Sure, it’s pantheism.
And that may be distasteful to you, and if so, that’s fine.
You refer to it as “some religious studies major taking both Buddhism and Hinduism and putting them together into a worthless hodgepodge of ideas.” But what makes it a “worthless hodgepodge of ideas”? Why do you think that about it? What makes it “worthless” to you?
I see this speech as a character trying to make sense of her connectedness to the cosmos in the moment of her impending death. It’s one thing to imagine how any of us may face the final curtain call of our brief lives on this planet, no matter how certain we may be in any of our religious beliefs. It’s another thing entirely to actually experience it. We never know for sure how our brains will attempt to comfort us in the final hour, what explanations we may reach for.
We all are trying to explain the mystery of existence to ourselves in our own ways, and it’s not just limited to the ideas found in major world religions such as the Abrahamic faiths of Judaism, Christianity, or Islam, or Eastern religions such as Buddhism and Hinduism.
No one knows for sure “what happens when we die,” despite what anyone may insist.
@@beccahawkins1905 I’ve explained why it’s worthless (not new or interesting, but most of all not true). At least those religions come to a conclusion on how to live, but this is just the literary equivalent of spitting into the wind. Perhaps I don’t know what happens when we die, but I know that whatever this show settled on was absolute bullshit. In any case, I just wanted those in this echo chamber to realize that though the ideas present here sound pretty, there is much that is contradictory about this expressed philosophy.
I have never been able to put my perspective about death into words but this scene just did. To be honest, I have never been moved as much by a monologue either. I can't even begin to explain how this moment made me feel ; peace - ease - tranquility - silence. This speech truly shook something inside me and to whoever wrote it, you did THAT. I will definitely be coming back to this.
I believe the director, Mike Flanigan, wrote the script as well.
Literally came here to say exactly this. I'm not ashamed to say I cried. To say I was moved is a understatement.
THis ☝ I am back re-watching it, and saved in a playlist as this cannot be forgotten :) 🙏
If you love the speech, look into non duality. That’s what you’re vibing with here
I watched this last episode last night and I got goosebumps and shed some tears and felt so much more okay with death.. I’m going watch this scene a lot.
That is wonderful! Nobody should be afraid.
re-watching it myself :) something to keep coming back to
This speech left me sobbing
*Serious spoilers*
**Very long post ahead**
This is Erin's monologue. This is truly a monologue as the conversation in the scene never truly happens, it only takes place in Erin's mind in her last moments before death.
Fitting, as her monologue essentially confirms Riley's agnostic and scientific approach to death, that memories and dreams all mash into one in the last moment of your death as your neurons fire simultaneously as if it's a final curtain call, a fireworks display. Giving you an experience of euphoria like you have never felt before.
But what's interesting is she did not just conflate her position with that of Riley's on the meaning of death, she did not just take a purely scientific stance on death. She built upon it with a spiritual dimension, much more complex than the abrahamic spiritual dimension she displayed in the actual conversation that took place with Riley a couple of days prior.
Her spiritual gloss over Riley's scientific approach to death seems like a pan-theistic reinterpretation of the abrahamic god, a sort of de-anthropomorphising of YHWH or Allah. A theological position that many modern Christians tend to lean towards in varying degrees.
However, everything she said here in plain English is distilled from concepts central to the philosophy-religions of the Indian subcontinent, and a cursory check informs me that every western media have missed this nuanced reading of Erin's monologue. Let me elucidate:
First she discusses the problem of the self. Abrahamic theology emphasises on the immutable self, that you, or atleast your soul is eternal. That you see yourself as distinct from another, good is distinct from evil, that God is sacred and distinct from impurities. Her rejection of the self is however a textbook illustration of the Mahayana concept of Anatta, the non-self. While the Anatta taught by Siddhartha may have been a simpler concept of not-self, the later Mahayana philosophers expanded the concept to mean non-self.
This expansion is likely a Hindu re influence on Buddhism stemming from the concept of Brahman. Brahman stipulates that the central force of the universe is one, and that we are all part of that one, good or evil, sacred or unholy, gods or demons, we are all part of that whole. And this clearly shows in Erin recognising that
"...there is no point where any of that ends, and I begin... I am energy, not memories, not self. My name, personality and choices all came after me, I was before them and I will be after, everything else is pictures picked up along the way, fleeting little dreamlets printed on the tissues of my dying brain, and I am the lighting that jumps between them..."
This emphasis on the in between, that you are not your memory, you are not your actions and emotions, is again a deep Mahayana tradition, leading later Mahayana philosophers to eventually contemplate on the concept of Sunyata, emptiness, but more on that later.
She then talks about being a drop of water returning to the ocean. This is a common metaphor used in Hindu Buddhist tradition. In Hinduism as a metaphor for Brahman, and the returning to the source of creation; in Buddhism to illustrate the concept of karma.
Interestingly, her monologue took a modern spiritual turn, contemplating the meaning of life and the purpose of consciousness. She posits that we are the result of the cosmos trying to know itself. Every one of our consciousness a dream the cosmos is having of itself. The cosmos' way of experiencing the vastness of itself. As far as I am aware, no spiritual tradition took this interpretation until modern science points it's telescope towards the stars.
Coming back to Mahayana concept of Sunyata, (emptiness) mentioned above, the next part of her speech alluded heavily towards this concept. One of the foremost work on this concept was found it the often chanted Prajna Paramita Hrdaya Sutra. Where the bodhisattva avalokitesvara seemingly instructs sariputra (a disciple of Siddhartha) on how to attain Prajna (the perfection of wisdom).
Erin mentioned that she spontaneously realises that "...there is no time, there is no death, life is a dream." This is not only in the style of the Hrdaya Sutra, but it's also the central thesis of the sutra. That the world and this life is Maya (illusion) and to peel beyond the Maya then is to realise Prajna Paramita (perfection of wisdom) and that realisation is that everything is Sunyata (emptiness). That sight, sense, smell, taste, desires, memories, feelings, thought, even consciousness itself is not real. In the words of Erin, like a dream.
And then she goes on to compare this consciousness functioning like a wish, a desire, and it comes back again, and again, and again and again. Needless to say, this alludes to the concept of rebirth in Buddhism or reincarnation in Hinduism. And the energy that drives this repetitive process is the desire, the Karma.
Erin doesn't elaborate beyond this, indicating only that she has broken the spell of ignorance, realising that the cycle of rebirth/reincarnation goes on for an eternity, and that she is all of and, every rebirth. She is everything. Culminating in the final phrase
"I am that I am"
Her seeming neutrality to the cycle of rebirth is what sets her awakening apart from Hindu Buddhist traditions, which imply that this cycle causes suffering, and this suffering can and should be stopped.
As far as I am informed, no one has explored this aspect of interpretation to Erin's monologue at time of writing.
I have been discussing the same with some of my friends as well. The monologue meshes together Erin (spiritual) and Riley's (scientific) interpretation of death from their conversation earlier and then goes on to subsume philosophical themes on Abrahmanic religions into non theistic consciousness based Hindu and Buddhist philosophy. It was a remarkable piece of writing!
This interpretation, or rather, this dissection of the monologue that the character “Erin Greene” delivers to us via the writers or writer is perfect… and I would rather not think of death any other way than this way. This is the perfect way to consider death as the next step.. to be okay with closing ones eyes and breathing a last breath for the last time. Poetically and with hope is how I have now decided to live last moments on earth.. and with that being unforeseen that means that I must live every day as such.. as if every day can and will be my last. Her speech really messed with my head in all the right ways.. and I truly commend the writers who came up with that monologue.
Also, I am about to do extensive research on a lot of names you mentioned and beliefs mentioned in your assessment.. thank you very much. It does not go unnoticed.. I thank you for being so inclined in the realm of spiritual belief and religion. Thank you. 🙏
Erins speech and your analysis of this speech is everything I thought about the universe we inhabit into words thank you so much! 🙏
Thanks for writing this, Bo. You should write an article about this. It’s such a good dissection. I’d hate for it to only live in the comment section of a RUclips people. I want others to be able to search for and find this
Vedanta is the most ancient philosophy and in fact it created the backbone of Buddhism. What she says as "self" and the Self in Vedanta are two different things. She was basically emphasizing Ego Aka the "I" and spoke of it as the 'self'. Her profound realization of the drop returning to the ocean is indeed god-realization as stated in Bhagavad Gita.
Thanks for this 🙏🏼 Namaskaram.
To be honest, this is where my faith is. This is more similar to how I view my faith. And now that it was translated into words, I am more enlightened to it? I can't explain it but I always thought that God itself is the universe and we are all just going to be part of it for infinity, just a cycle in the cosmos.
glad I'm not the only one. was really happy that a media just about described and blended my faith and love of science into a single thing which is fitting as religion was the progenitor of science, the first attempt at understanding the world around us, in a far more innocent view of the world when men still lived in caves
So secular Buddhism?
I was catholic, but my faith is always different, never understand and never can be explain clearly, and this is what I think about life, death, God, universe, faith, this text is so precious, because I've lost my father in June, and so hard, but this serie really helped me in my life, because hope❤️
@@sandrinecastagna3820 im sorry for you❤️🩹
@@alpewea thank u so much🙏🥰
No one has never put my theories about death in better words... WHAT AN EPIC MONOLOGUE!!!!!!1!1!111
I can only agree with you and i´m also very impressed!
Absolutely what I believe🕉💜
This is pure enlightenment...
exactly! just beautiful!
This is how I felt my whole life. I cried when I watched this monologue tonight, because I was overwhelmed by the thought that others feel and believe the same way I do. Thank you ❤️
I cannot repeat how much I LOVE THIS !!! EPIC !!!
Thanks for posting this. I finished the series yesterday and this monologue is the heart of my perspective, an awesome summary of the Hermetic perennial philosophy that underlies most wisdom traditions.
This show was captivating and life changing. It is an experience. I watched in two days and it was beautiful and sad. In a good way. I really hope that it gets award recognition. The writing and acting especially
I teared up real good at this one. This is exactly what I have believed about life for so long. Life doesn’t have a meaning, or a purpose, it just happens. That’s what makes it beautiful. Life isn’t existing to serve an end purpose or to reach a goal, it is just the effect of the universe existing and energy moving within it, as a part of it. Parts of the universe have come together and formed into me through various processes that were also the result of different aspects of the universe combining. The way these parts have formed into me give me the feeling of something greater, create a consciousness. But consciousness is an illusion. It is just a bunch of different processes happening because of how different parts of the universe have collected into one unit. A time will come when they will separate again. All I am is a bunch of energy bumbling around and mingling, happening to cluster together for the moment that is human history, and that’s beautiful. This monologue says that we’re like drops in an ocean, but I think it’s more like we’re ice crystals. We form from the water that’s there, exist for a time, and then we’re water again when that time is done. The ice isn’t gone, it’s just returned back to what it was before it happened to become ice.
I showed my mom this show last month. She’s now gone. She passed away a little over a week ago. This monologue has seriously helped me get through this difficult time.
Sending you my deepest condolences for the loss of your loved one 🙏
Awww I'm sorry to hear that my condolences and may she rest in paradise in joy. This scene is amazing and points to spiritual enlightenment 3rd 👁
The most beautiful monologue I have ever heard, the writing, the delivery, absolute perfection.
I am currently dealing with the inevitability of one of my parents departures, and this scene.. the timing for me it’s so perfect. Cannot express how much this scene has effected me and brought me peace, putting all my scrambled thoughts on death in order ❤️I wish I could hug the writers and Kate Seigal tell them thankyou
I am the lightning that jumps between ✨❤️
This scene had me in tears. This is one of the most beautiful monologues I have ever seen. The writing on this show is top tier.
I’ve never heard my my internal knowing put so eloquently into words. Wow-the writing in this show is so powerful. Amazing speech.
This speach was just.... perfection
Because it's truth!🕉💜
I believe in every word
@@daliamonteiro5084 absolutely!
Utter tripe, unfortunately, if you have any knowledge of metaphysics.
@@5quepasa What happens to us after we die is our own belief, and when something feels right and eases peoples existance on this plane, let it be. It is not hurting one person besides yourself obviously.
Having both of my parents in their 70s and slowly losing their physical and mental faculties I teared up like a fucking baby during this. Fuck.
Pantheism, encapsulated so eloquently 😍
Absolutely beautiful.
Yes, I am also VERY impressed with Erin's monologue!!!
Without doubt the best monologue I've ever heard. The scripting, the delivery, it's just epic. I literally watch this every day and it puts my mind at ease, that there are people out there with the same views as myself about death.
This scene was just beyond beautiful thank you for extracting it I knew it’d be powerful enough for others to recognize as well
This is breath taking...lol literally the first time I heard it it resonated so deeply with me I just sobbed quietly trying to catch my breath and still digest what she was saying... It's like when you hear a philosopher like Alan Watts' teachings and It completely blows your mind but it makes everything make sense at the same time and mends your heart because you understand someone else understands...perfect I am that I am
i teared up so much during her last monologue. It made me feel sad, empty, but also at peace. The finale of this show was good, but tragic and bittersweet
Big Allen Watts vibes and I’m here for it.
I immediately watched “the real you” after the series ended!
This scene made me cry..Kate Siegel dying while recalling the conversation, Monseigneur Pruitt carrying his dead daughter with his wife and Sheriff Hasan and his son dying after reciting the sunrise prayer.
Knew I heard it before as I watched.....Alan Watts the one and only.
I was thinking the same thing... "You are the universe experience itself" - Alan Watts.
He spoke great truths
This scene had me in tears, and then the actual ending afterwards.
I watched this the week my father passed away.... Just wow
I love this scene I remembered when I saw it. It’s speak to my soul.
So sad and reminds me of Nell’a confetti speech in Haunting of Hill House!
There is no time no death only dream.
This is very much what people experience in an NDE. Mike Flanagan had obviously done his research on NDE’s for this speech
"Openness to all experience is not something, we, as Awareness do, it's what we are" - Rupert Spira
What really awes me is that this is EXACTLY what DMT feels like. I've been through some rituals with ayahuasca and I've never been able to describe how it feels. This is it.
It's also a throwback to her conversation with Riley, she's going through what he described - a DMT trip. But since she's living it while describing it is described in a more personal and sensitive way.
Beautiful stuff!
i did mushrooms and that is what i felt, i cry when i heard this
We feel these things while on psychedelics for a reason I believe it is the universe revealing its true nature, like remembering our true origins for the first time again.
Riley did actually mention dmt earlier
This has to be the best theory I’ve ever heard
Looking for this... hahaha... great minds!
She said everything i wanted to say about my 5 day old son Jacob RIP 😓👼
I was nearly sobbing watching this part. It just…. Wow.
THANK YOU I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS EVERYWHERE. IT'S JUST. SO. BEAUTIFUL. THANK YOU!!
What a performance
This literally cured my thanatophobia.
I like the grainy affect. It's like a filter between worlds.
She is a real.life liberatarian
Spiritual enlightenment 3rd eye ❤
To think that the final scene in a way ties the definition of God to the Hindu concept of Brahman just wowed me. I didn't expect that at all.
And they tied it into the Bible phrase, 'I am that I am', which has an almost similar equivalent in Hinduism- Tat Tvam Asi - "you are that", meaning you are what you seek, and another equivalent - Aham Brahmasmi - "I am divine". The interrelationship of the individual essence, Atman, with the larger, universal, omnipresent Divine called Brahman.
When she says we are the universe looking and dreaming of itself, it's a reference to Advaita Vedanta, that we are living in a dream world called Maya, going through cycles of creation and destruction over and over again. Completely Hindu stuff!
TL;DW - "Everything wrong in my life inevitably resolves itself because I cannot be the problem. I'll adjust my beliefs anyway possible to believe that, no matter how unfounded it is. I'll even call myself God."
Okay, Father Changstein El-Gamal.
We are the space
I....I forgot.
I thought this was beautiful. I grasped this concept years ago doing Kundalini Yoga, but I forgot and I've been living in my mind for years. This brought me back to that understanding.
Thanks for recording it.
Did anyone think this whole scene/speech was sooooo unrealistic???
🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🤧🤧🤧
These concepts are very familiar for psychonauts. Another person who talk about this kind of concepts is Jim Carrey, and he did it many times. Have you ever noticed?
Haven't watched the show. Does she mean that after death she will lose her individual I am, and melt into a big one?
Sooooo sappy 🙄
🐸♾❤️
There’s a lot of Buddhist influence in this speech
And Hindu too
*Hindu. Not Buddhist.
Couldn't understand anything though
This is the point where the show shit the bed.
Agreed. Missed opportunity to express a more coherent and deeper message,.
@@robertwiley5918 and something simpler. No long-winded monologue, just a change in belief. It could have been expressed in one sentence. But it went on, and on. Less is more, in this situation.
@@stevenbatke4167 literally if she just spoke the words “I am that I am” as she was dying, that would’ve made for a more impactful and interpretable scene than this nonsense lol
This is a parody of Carl Sagan with Pale dot and Neil Tyson with programs about space. But it's still beautiful, there are more such parodies.
And nothing of substance was said.
Bill Hicks did it better.
He’s just looking at her like “You done talking yet? FFS!” 😆
no
his reaction was like ".... that's nice. I don't buy it, but you do you"
Thought this was sacrilegious
Legitimately the most pretentious monologue of writing I've ever witnessed.
I agree, I’m surprised people are acting like it’s the best part of the show.
I liked it!
It felt so tacked on too, and sort of a betrayal of what her character was set up to be. It’s like Flanagan smoked a j, marathoned a bunch of Bill Hicks specials and then watched Waking Life and had the bright idea to insert this bullshit into his horror show lol. I can’t believe people are eating this shit up, I was dying laughing at the end of it.
This was the cringiest scene of the whole show
phew I thought I was the only one cringing
Just me but I thought this monologue was way too long. Nobody talks like that.
The only monologues that I ever enjoyed were both from 25th hour, where they weren’t dragged out.
I liked the monologues between Riley and father Paul, I could even withstand Bev’s (despite her being a horrible person/fantastic actress) but Erin’s one here is just boring.
The whole show suffered from this to some extent
This was my favorite monologue of the show, one of my favorites ever. But it’s because I connected so deeply to what she was saying. Because it’s how I already viewed existence. When someone can give voice to something you’ve never really put into words, it’s such a moving, life changing thing. But yeah no one talks like this. :)
@@nicsmall589 except for Alan Watts hahah but no one discusses abstract thought because no one is willing to truly listen the people who talk like this are speaking to no one most often only the ether catches the words muttered from those people
I think it might be boring if you don't vibe with what she is saying. To me it was very beautiful. But when the priest was having bible monologues I had to skip out of boredom, but a devout christian may have those parts are their favorites etc.
@@RnRnR that's probably very true. I've talked to several people about this show and I always bring up this particular monologue, and no one really has anything to say about it. I feel like either you really connect with it or you don't.
I enjoyed the show, but this was incoherent fluff. Basically the writer was trying to copy Rust Cohle in True Detective but without making sense.
This is very coherent for people who have felt this exact feeling when doing psychedelics or lived through an NDE. This monologue spoke to me directly.
@@dbrandeau those experiences do not grasp reality, they escape it. Subjective experiences like the ones described are only that, subjective experiences. With no corresponding objective reality.
Incoherent for those who don't know the Advaita philosophy in Hinduism.
This is absolute hell,
To come back over and over?
If I lived in a setting like the movie Avatar then yes!!
But what about a wicked world rulership where the elite control everyone except for their royal blood? And everyone else has no freedoms and are slaves? Would u wanna comeback to that?
Also we are NOT GOD
Someone created this process of life and essence and it wasnt ourselves so we CANNOT say “i am that i am”
Also theres a plethora of things in the bible that have been proven…
The statue of lots wife as a pillar of salt
Noahs ark in mt ararat, exactly where it said it would be.
Proof of giants and skeletons
Sodom and gommorrah balls of sulfur next to jericho in the middleeast
Cool story
💀
One of the worst things I’ve ever heard spoken and such a betrayal of her character. What’s more, it’s so, so wrong from a metaphysical perspective. It made me regret watching this show. It’s odd that I found Riley’s death far more moving.
How was it a betrayal? She grew up, she finally understood.
@@kthstefani She understood what exactly? That she is God, the universe is God? No, that is so meaningless as to be idiotic. God is “one” not “all”. One, by its metaphysical definition, can’t be divided and the universe is very clearly divided. You are not me and I am not you. Stars are not trees, etc, even if physically things came from the Big Bang. Her earlier description of death was far more profound because of the fact that our souls seek infinite happiness and therefore must be created for it. This necessarily means that such a destiny awaits us. For her character to go from a developed understanding of death to this mundane, almost polar opposite understanding in the course of two days is, yes, a betrayal of her character.
@@5quepasa I really don't know how to explain it to you. You're interpretation isn't mine and mine isn't yours. You may be right and I may be right. It can't be proven in any way.
@@kthstefani It boggles the mind that you really typed that and did not think for a second, “This is why I have a rational mind. Not to discover the mysteries of the world, but just so that I can say, ‘Well, that’s just your opinion, man. We can’t really know who’s right.’” I really hope this isn’t how you live because, frankly, it makes you seem spineless.
@@5quepasa How does it boggle your mind? I'm saying one can't argue with someone who has their mind made up.
This has to be the best theory I’ve ever heard