4 YEARS SOBER | Tips for living Alcohol-Free
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- Опубликовано: 6 сен 2024
- hello my angels
thank you for watching this video! I really hope it helps and if you have any questions please do not hesitate to ask and if you have any, please share any other advice in the comments!
during this video I mention a few lovely people sharing their experience with sobriety and they are listed below:
sobergirlsociety
milliegooch
dryyapp
andyramageofficial
better_life_guy
dralexgeorge
see you next week at 10am for my first vlog in a long time!
sending you so much love,
from Steph xxxxxxx
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instagram: stephelswood
app: www.enough.health
Just celebrated my 16th Day Of Sobriety. Quitting drinking alcohol was the best decision I made in my entire life.
Congratulations that’s amazing!!
How are you feeling now?
@@cheyennescottage Great. Every day is a gift.
And yourself?
@FKQ doing good! It's more a cultural thing that I find hard to stay away from. We live in the south where "just a beer" at cookouts and stuff is really normal. Did you have to change who you hangout with, where, etc?
In 5 days I will be sober for a year. Best decision I've ever made/
Congratulations!!!
I’m 52 days sober. You’re right, it’s the people that make being sober hard! My mom asked me why not just one. Lol no support.
Amazing on 52 days!
Those first few months were so challenging but one day at a time will get you there!
Having enough confidence in yourself to not care what other people think is the key to a lot of success in life. Seriously. It comes with age and maturity for some people but if you can unlock the scale when you're young, you're way ahead of the game!
*this skill
I agree!
Alcohol is the only drug you need to explain why you’re not taking it to others. I heard that before and how true. Many people suffer from alcohol addiction in some degree but most still suffer through and never even think about quitting.
Well done girl you are beautiful and brave to share this video with others ❤
Once I stopped drinking I noticed how pushy people are. People never do this with other drugs, I got a polite offer at best.
Just stopped drinking today. I poured all my alcohol down the drain & I’m happy I did. I’m so excited for sobriety. I’m a completely different person when I drink….i don’t like me drunk. Plus I’m sure my health will be much better too.
Hows it going!?
@@MsSheilaC didn’t last long unfortunately
@@lyndsayboyd7218 im only 107 days in, minus a glass at my daughters graduation celebration, but one thing Ive heard on these kinds of videos that is helpful is "never stop quitting"
in other words keep quitting until it sticks. Best of luck!
its so crazy. I effectively quit drinking just 24 days ago and never at one time thought how bored will I be, but more so OMG there are some many things I can do now because I'm not slumped over with a hang over, or spending time trying to piece together the night before, apologizing, etc... I looked over my vlogs where I had been drinking , recorded and actually LEFT the footage of me plastered in... what a wreck.. I love the freedom I have away from the monkey. As far as the group of people I no longer spend that much time anymore.. with OH WELL.. I also realized they were only dimensional and limited to me.. Not saying its easily but the benefits FAR outweigh the negatives.. - thanks for your share
No one has prepared me for how hard this would be. I’m on day 5 right now and really struggling. Luckily I wasn’t an alcoholic for too long so the physical withdrawals aren’t bad, however I feel so depressed and worthless and I know alcohol will make me feel better but I also know it’s only a quick fix. Today especially hit me hard as all my friends who I haven’t saw in a while are going on a big night out (perfect timing😅) and I told them I can’t go when deep down I really want to. I know I can go and not drink but it’s too early on and I don’t trust myself not just accepting a drink as none of my friends know how serious I’m being about this. It’s killing me. I also am very socially anxious and have used alcohol to make me more confident and get by so I am going to struggle so much just being myself without alcohol. Please tell me it gets easier
Completely resonate. I’ve been tee total since uni cos I think I’m allergic. It’s healthier, cheaper and it defo shows you the good people! You learn to feel more confident in “I don’t drink”, I’ve had “god that’s so boring” I’ve had people I thought were my friends apologise for me in front of me because I’m not drinking “sorry about her”, I’ve had people hear me politely decline and get a mock tail and then they persist in the whole evening and alienate you. But you learn to grow stronger because of it and you find your people ❤
I’m sorry you’ve had horrible experiences with other people but good for you to sticking with your decision! ❤ sending love always and thank you for watching xxx
Ridiculous how people think, like you're some sort of scum because you made a good decision in your life to stop polluting your body you know smh. Keep it up your body and mind will continue to thank you for it.
I got a dui at the end of october 2023, and dealing with the consequences of it has been very challenging (and expensive. Currently watching my savings account erode to nothing trying to pay for lawyer fees, classes, assessments, more expensive insurance, etc). It's also made me reconsider the role that i want alcohol to play in my life.
I started drinking regularly at the age of 20. Before that, i was really against alcohol. Literally anti-alcohol, mainly from dealing with the dysfunction that alcohol had brought into my homelife.
Being in my early college days, it was very challenging to meet new people who didn't drink alcohol. Honestly, i started drinking just so i would start getting invited to things and make friends.
I've noticed some of the health issues you mentioned. Stomach problems. I used to never take tums for anything, and now i get heartburn quite a bit and always have tums around. My hairline has also started shrinking back and getting a bit thinner.
I so relate to the anxiety part. I used to drive drunk a lot more than I'd like to admit, and there were so many times I'd wake up the next morning and immediately have to check my car for fear i had smashed it. There's also the anxiety that i had said or done something really embarrassing that people would make fun of me for.
Honestly, I don't necessarily want to get rid of it permanently, but i do think it needs to play a much smaller role in my life than it currently is. Otherwise, going completely sober has been a consideration of mine for a long time.
I’ve heard it’s as bad in the UK as it is in Ireland. It’s pretty difficult in Ireland. Everything revolves around alcohol. Especially in a small town people live for the weekend to go for a few drinks.
I tried going out at the weekends without drinking and I honestly feel nervous around a pub full of drunk people when I’m completely sober. It’s actually insane when you are in a pub late at night sober you see things so differently 😬
I've just started my sober journey (last drink was New Year's Eve) and this video has helped so much. I've been thinking about it for a while, never had an issue just got sick of hangovers and anxiety etc and decided 2023 was the year to do it! I work a 9-5 office job and have to entertain clients a lot with dinners and nights out so I'm quite nervous about that. I know my colleagues won't understand but I'm finally in a place where I feel like if someone can't accept my decisions and be supportive then they don't belong in my life and their opinion of me is irrelevant. Such a good video and so helpful to hear your journey, thank you!
Thank you for being so honest and for watching!!! Good luck with your journey and I’m always here if you have any questions. I’ll try my best to help if I can 😘 xxxx
Single over here and navigating dating without drinking has really been a bold move! But worth it and gives you that superpower to better asset an authentic connection! Thanks for your content and tips here
Sending you lots of love during this journey ❤️
Same boat as you and needed to hear this❤️
you don’t need to drink to loose your inhibitions love 😘😘
Sober a long time now, as years have gone by I have come to believe that the only people I relate to are in recovery. We live fuller lives with deeper meaning. People that haven't experienced recovery seem shallow and self absorbed. That's a biased perspective but true.
That’s an interesting insight. I think not just substance recovery but I think from trauma, grief, any challenge that has been overcome, brings great learnings and an even greater perspective
@@StephElswood Astonishing that you should say that. We have started a group to deal with the exact things you mentioned. It is in the formulation stage to help people deal with trauma, grief, abuse as well as the shame that comes with it. We are using the 12 steps as a framework but it is not identical. The first step is "We realize that we have been damaged but can not heal ourselves."
Stopped drinking eight years ago after drinking for fifty years with the last thirty-five years drinking excessively. I knew that t0 do several things to sustain sobriety. One was to find a plan that worked for me and work that plan. Refusing to give myself any no-fault excuses to relapse. Knew that I had to find a way to fill the void that was created when I quit. Use any resources that I believed would be an asset, and if they weren't to move on. I've always been more of a results guy than a process guy. In other words the goal is to stay sober and enjoy the rest of my life. Not being a Christian warrior promoting AA or anything other means. My goal was to promote my sobriety and anyone else in recovery. Regardless of how they got there
Over 2 years sober after drinking hard for 23 years. It’s not an easy path. Quitting is easy, staying sober for the first month is tough but with good supplements and a pattern interrupt for when you would drink I found essential. I just went for a long walk every night and listened to a guy called Craig Beck. His audio books on alcohol cessation are amazing. I lost 33 pounds and have saved over £10k. You will lose friends but they were just drinking partners and it’s only because your perceived higher standards make them shine a light on themselves and they feel uncomfortable. I’m at peace with having fewer friends but more authentic ones. I also feel I’m more present for my little daughter and partner. Quitting alcohol is like a cheat code for life. You need to Want it though. Will power does not work. I’m not even tempted anymore and I don’t miss it.
This is brilliant mark. Congratulations on your journey and thank you so much for sharing!
Thanks Steph. Great video with lots of positive messages.
Listen to Craig too❤
Thank you for this inspirational video. I quit Jan 4 2023 and was feeling so great. Then three weeks ago I went out with the guys and broke my streak. So, only three weeks sober now after going three months, however, I am not going back ever again. Your videos and the videos of others I follow will keep me sober and on the right path. Thank you for what message you're putting out there, it helps more than you know!
If you're anything like me, you've said, "I am not going back ever again" more than a few times. I understand. The foundation for getting and staying sober is to STOP focusing on "Not going back", and start focusing on the root problem..."SELF". If you need a gallon of milk, but are only watching RUclips videos about milking cows, you'll still need a gallon of milk tonight, tomorrow, next week, and next month.
Without the willingness to move your feet, your sobriety will be precarious at best. "Live in the problem, or live in the solution". I sincerely wish you well. Mark 5/8/1994
I LOVE this video. So helpful and motivating! I’ve decided to cut down drinking to a max of once a month and I’ve been enjoying sober nights out. I really love how it allows you to become more confident in setting boundaries and sticking to them. I also want to remember what my friends say when I see them and actually connect with them too 😊 Thanks for being a sober role model for us young women!
This is amazing! I’m so glad you feel good for your decision! 😍 please keep me updated on how your journey goes! Thank you for watching and for such kind words xxxx
As the quote by Charles Cooley goes "I'm not what I think I am, I am not what you think I am, I am what I think you think I am". Living in the perspective of a perspective of what you are is so twisted but we all fall into that trap. So lovely to hear you talk so vulnerable and raw about your experience and glad your sobriety has been such a life changing decision for you. Happy for you and love seeing these videos and your cutie patootie face every week 😁❤️
Thank you so much for watching ❤ and for always being so supportive. I know I’ve only been back posting such a short time, but I’m really enjoying it so it makes me really happy to know you are too xx
Love this!!! The who you're with and where you are message is SO true! I can be near sober, having the time of my life and I realised it was the environment and the people I was with... whereas other times, I am at an event and I'm thinking, if no one was drinking would they be having fun? And that's to say, sometimes it's not the alcohol, it's what you're doing and the people you're doing it with and if alcohol is the only thing that can trigger you having fun with certain people/at certain places then it might be time to try new things!
Honestly could not agree more!!! ❤ thank you so much for watching! Xxx
Hi Steph, I just found your video as I am looking for some advice on sobriety….similarly to what you’ve mentioned is exactly why I’m wanting to give it up. I know it’s going to be challenging because I love a red wine and I am Scottish but I’ve become increasingly insecure when I’m drinking alcohol it’s horrible and not worth it. Thank you for making this video it’s helped immensely 😊 best wishes 💕😌
Hey Lorraine. Thank you so much for watching! I hope you found it helpful. Always here if ever you have any questions. Xxx
I’ve just stumbled across your channel from my home page and it’s such great timing. I’ve just launched a business and decided to go sober for the first few months for the launch but I may just continue for as long as I can/want to, which may end up in me being sober long term. I’m not labelling it. It’s my birthday this weekend and I’ve had my first sober birthday meal and really enjoyed it. X
I love that! Labels aren’t necessary at all! Just go at your pace without pressure or expectation. I hope the launch of your business goes well! ❤
Such good content here. I consider myself a grey area drinker. Totally functional but got into the habit of drinking at night making dinner, then after dinner, until the wine was gone. My driving force is centered around health. I work so hard at staying in good physical shape, but I just considered alcohol to be my night time friend. I’ve recently realized he’s not a good friend but a fake. Waking up several times a night not feeling great, and reacting to things with my wife in ways that were not the real me. Increased anxiety and just the overall numbness of life. I appreciate your insight here. You’ve got nice energy and it is certainly compelling.
Thank you so much for sharing! I hope you enjoyed the video❤️
Me. My habit exactly! I'm good all day, all night except for that 4 hours or so when you're tired from the workday and hungry because, well, hungry. I'm on my Third Quit (there are more...) and 4 days in. It's mostly ok but there are some moments!! It's wonderful if your partner knows your journey and can support you. I'm very open when I'm feeling triggered. Helps me be mindful. Hang in there, friend.
2 months and a week sober and finally a video I can relate. I have not been alcoholic, which oddly makes it harder to justify it with other people. Even my close friends and family say, but you have never drank much, aren’t you overdoing things? Although they do support me.
I have been recently in Cenral Asia and I am Eastern European - both societies where privacy and personal boundaries are close to nonexistent. I have definitely been bullied into drinking unceremoniously within this period. My other non/drinking colleague says flat out she is on medications in these situations and everyone leaves you alone 😂
Steph you are so honest and real, I hope it doesn’t go unnoticed how much you care about what you’re talking about and how much you care about not offending anyone with this topic ❤ such an inspiration!
This is the sweetest comment ever. Gosh, thank you so much ❤️
We live in a world full of alcohol, you can be sober and still live a beautiful and fun life ☺️🙌🏻, and this video is lovely, and
I am 4 months sober and really enjoying! my life now being sober ☺️, and now that I look back I was an alcoholic for over a year, alcohol took over my life ☹️ massively, but now I live a sober and happy life ☺️🙌🏻
Congratulations on 4 months sober. How is it all going? Sending love on this beautiful journey xxx
If you have to rely on a drug to have a good time then you need to have a good look at whats wrong with your life, been sober two years and feel the most confident I've ever been. Great content
Congratulations on 2 years!
I’m 7 weeks sober. I would have a lot of anxiety after nights with wine. Wake up 3 am racing heart, wondering about thing I may have said, etc. And even tho I drank 1-3 glasses of wine per night, I made the decision to quit spontaneously and I feel fantastic! I told my friends and family and they were fine with it. No funny remarks or anything. I have noticed that being the only sober one at events can get a bit boring watching how everyone acts a bit loud after a few. I’m just so happy I quit. Like a huge monkey off my back! Anxiety, sleep, and my skin are phenomenal. It feels so nice to wake up after not drinking!
Haven't had a drink in one year
No beer.
No wine.
No wine cooler.
Water, coffee, diet coke only.
Amazing!
@StephElswood thank you. Nobody understands how hard it is to go 1 day without a drink. 1 week. 1 year
All great points! We need to destroy the stigma(s) against sobriety. Be a fun person no matter what.
That anxiety that you used to feel the day after Is not only scientific but spiritual.. My husband wants to do a great job explaining what was going on because the same thing happens to me
This video is so amazing. It is so nice to see other people having the exact same thoughts as me. I have the exact same issue with anxiety the next day and nobody can ever relate to my issue around me. I’m from France and wine is such a culture here that telling people you don’t drink is almost a scandal. Thank you so much for this video ! 🎉
Thank you so much for watching! ❤️ sorry to hear that you feel the same but I hope it was helpful! X
This was a nice video and you most certainly did not sound like you were superior for not drinking. I enjoyed listening to your experience 👌🏿
Thank you so much for watching
Love this! And absolutely love you! ❤I’ve joined your sober challenge. I’m on day 13 and loving how I feel already xx
Oh I love this!!! How have you found the challenge so far? ❤
@@StephElswood really good easier than I thought it would be to be honest. I think it’s Because I am determined to change my mindset on alcohol ❤️
@@thebutterflyjourney33 love that so much ❤ please keep me updated with how you’re doing!
This is so accurate…still feel like I am more fun off booze than some on it but just choose your friends right!
I love that!!!! ❤
Ive been doing Dry January and I’m thinking of keeping it up long term as the hangxiety and stuff was too much! But I think the thing I am dreading the most is the champagne cheers at birthdays/ celebrations… I know there is no secco and things but I hate it! My family are big into celebrating the little things so it’ll be often enough… they wouldn’t really pressure me! But I love those times…
Congratulations on doing dry jan! Glad to hear your enjoying it. I think, just take each situation as it comes. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself to be “perfect” and there is never a win or lose with this stuff. Sometimes I’ll still cheers with a champagne to keep involved but just give it away afterwards to someone else. But also, if there are big family get togethers and you want that champagne, that’s ok too!!! Do what’s best for you and your lifestyle ❤ there’s never any judgement xxxx
This feels like such a 'diet mentality trap' where we tend to focus so much on those few birthdays or parties, instead of the other 355 days a year. I think we have all fallen for it. Just do sobriety on all the other days and when it gets to birthdays/celebrations take it as they come. If you feel like it on those instances, fine. If you don't, also fine :)
@@Dara-tn8rg yeah that’s what I was trying to say!! No expectation or pressure.. just do what works for you!
I had started my sobriety journey on 3rd of January but I fell back yesterday and I feel so bad about it 😭
Please be gentle with yourself ❤️ try to figure out what tempted you and use this as a lesson to grow and strengthen your decision!
Loved this video, thanks Steph for coming back to RUclips! Missed you ❤
Ah Jenni thank you for watching!! I’m enjoying being back so that’s really lovely ❤
I think you're looking for the word pillar 🤣 although I enjoy boulder! 3 of the 4 out of our group are doing dry January, and we've got a holiday this month!
I honestly don’t know what word I was looking for 😂😂😂😂but glad you knew what I meant haha! Oh wow.. that will be lovely to try a holiday alcohol free! Where are you off to?? I hope you all enjoy. Let me know how it goes! ❤
@@StephElswood were off to Iceland! One of the girls was actually panicking tonight as she's going out and not drinking, worrying what people will say. Sent her your video!
@@stephaniewaight2752 oh my goodness that will be AMAZING!!! Have the best time. I hope your friend is ok! I’m happy to answer any questions if she has any. I don’t know everything 😂 but I’ll try my best to help! X
Cannot seem to quit. Been since about covid, going on 4 years of drinking 6-8 beers a night easily 6 nights a week. Want to quit or at the very least largely reducing but by 7:30pm I can't. Also my husband is a mad enabler and has a problem too
You need to kindly ask your husband to appreciate your journey of sobriety, and ask him not drink around you. If he isn't supportive, try asking him to NOT drink around you. Then if that dosnt work ...therapy, separation, counselling. I wish you luck. Not drinking is the BEST! your so much more lucid and present. Honestly do it.
ahahha "I just didn't wanna tell them that I used to get a little nervous the next day" 🤣 vibes. Same.
I gave up drinking alcohol on the January 1st 2009 at 12:30 am.
Haven't had any since.
The book book "30 Days to Sobriety" by Harper Daniels is pretty good for mindfulness training to stop drinking.
Oooo thank you!
I didn't know is was gonna be so hard to quit drinking
Iv got a close friend that swears she doesn’t have a drink problem (personally I think she does) I have expressed to her that her drinking has become more frequent. She gets defensive so I don’t mention it no more.. she drinks all weekend with friends & drinks secretly, she did go thru a traumatic experience so the friend group put it down to “that’s just how she’s dealing with it” at first it was a couple of drinks to fall asleep (again we understood) but now it’s literally all the time. We want to be there for her, we love her, she swears it’s always the last and that she’s quitting but she just ends up doing it secretly thinking we can’t tell she’s had a drink… what other approach cud I try? Any help wud be appreciated
Love this, thank you Steph! ❤
Thank you so much for watching! ❤️❤️❤️
Beautiful soul !!
Thank you!
You have to have a strong frame when you stop. At least in the beginning.
Getting new friends is actually a good tip
Can you mention or provide a link to the guys you mentioned? Thank you for this video!
Congratulations on your sobriety.
Thank you x
Good video covering genuine concerns. .
Im just starting out my journey.
Good luck on your journey ❤️
Totally agree. Isn’t it strange that there is pressure to put that poison into your body.
OK, these are some good reminders, there’s no question that increasing your mental clarity and boosting your drive, comes with quitting. Yes, there are many ways to kick the habit, Steffon Barkload's Quit Drinking Forever is what worked for me, best shortcut I go’ogled that took days without withdrawal.
Did you get sober through a programme or did you just do it by yourself ?
Ethanol and water are the main ingredient in all alcoholic drinks. The sane ethanol they add to gasoline.
It's my birthday today. I'm 42. I got hammered last night. On the way home, i nearly shit my pants. Luckily, I made it home to the toilet on time. I'm not addicted to alcohol but i drink too much at weekends. From now on, i won't be touching alcohol again.
Its never too late to stop! I used the Allen Carr Easyway method, stopped in one week, after 40 years of dependency. No religion, no AA. Never looked back. I made a video about it, "An Artist's Journey to Alcohol Free " on my channel.
Good message. Thanks!
You’re welcome! Thanks for watching x
Ive tried to stop drinking but ill probably die drinking is what it is
Alcohol seels lies;)) 1, 5 year alcohol free!! Best what i ever did!
Looks like Shania Twain in ka-ching
I’m 104 days sober 😊
Amazing! Congratulations!!
great vid :)
Thank you x
i Went to a party the other night i was the sober one.,, it was like being in a room full of aliens
Hello Beautiful thank you
You’ve got great charm on your face
Thanks xxx
Hi do you have any whatapo group for going sober?
@@parasjoshi570 no unfortunately not but there is an app called ‘Dryy’ that is great for that x
Thanks ☺️
Drinking and driving kills. Could you be next? Please- never drive drunk or high
This whole video is about how I’m sober 😂
@@StephElswood Correct, but I am assuming the people who scroll your comments are struggling with drinking. And that some of them drive drunk. Ergo, I posted this. Congrats, tho, that is awesome! I am just past ten years. You will never regret the decision.
Alcohol and meth was what made me a peace of s**t.
I ruined my life on meth pills and alcohol everyone hates me now
Very fast talking
Sorry xoxo
Are you bi?
No xx