i've been there a couple times and it's so awkward! i am learning however, to take a few seconds and ask myself if i am saying too much and that usually helps.
The paradox I feel is that we're living in the era of getting paid to "be ourselves" but we simultaneously have to set boundaries with said audience/people group. I think reality TV shows have played a huge part in the over-sharing culture, but as with all things fame/popularity, it can destroy those who don't set the boundaries.
yes, that's definitely part of it. what you're talking about is certainly the balancing act that (aspiring) content creators find themselves facing when dealing with a following of any size. what's interesting to me is that even people who are not pursuing a career in content creation voluntarily disclose information about themselves that would otherwise be considered private or deeply personal, with little to no incentive; they don't stand to gain social capital or monetary compensation divulging this information yet they do so regardless, and that makes no sense to me.
This was insightful. As a D1 yapper myself I honestly hate that awkward feeling I get when I get home and replay the conversations. Learning to listen more currently. 😊 Keep the videos coming
i'm sad to say i know the feeling all too well. it's so cringe! but that's why you gotta take a second to think before you say what you might regret in a couple of hours. you got this!
gonna try and piggyback off of this by saying yes, and maybe you can include people who might want to know but don't necessarily share the ambition? i wouldn't tell my barber about my goals because i don't think he cares at all (and i don't expect him to). but i would want to share this desire to build a youtube channel with some of my friends, who have no ambition of doing anything in content creation but i guarantee want to support me in my endeavors (they just don't know what those endeavors are because i'm annoyingly secretive about it). there is a benefit to sharing your ambitions with people of like minds but don't forget to keep in mind those who would love to cheer you on.
I agree! When I told people my dreams I never pursued them because I almost got the dopamine telling them and then they’d ask about it and I’d feel awful for not starting it. Great channel looking forward to seeing it grow!
that is for sure something that makes me think twice before telling someone what my goals are. but honestly something else that holds me back is that it'll be more rewarding to tell them when i've done it instead of telling them that i'm striving for it. i appreciate you saying this :)
i used to do this all the time! and to stop that cycle of not pursuing my goals, I wrote out a list of what i wanted to accomplish and did not share it with anyone. no pics/updates on social media, saying very little in social circles, nothing. making moves in silence is my motto because my goals are for me and if i continued that path of letting everyone know what i am doing or what i'd like to do then it was like i was doing it for their acknowledgment and not myself. hope things work out for you :)
great video! i def have an issue with oversharing and then i get uncomfortable when people ask about it later like "oh you said you wanted to move to ___ how is that coming along?". i need to remember to share accomplishments, not dreams.
Guard your thoughts because not all are meant for sharing. As Lao Tzu wisely said, 'Those who know do not speak. Those who speak do not know.' Preserve your energy and wisdom for those who truly value them.
On the theme of oversharing: I was told to share less because people don't care. At first that stung. Now it makes sense. Your words helped me understand protecting my endeavors. Establishing boundaries are not easy, but I am learning. Thank you. Keep working hard.
I would say there is a value to keeping cards close from being judged or dismissed. I will say if you’re a yapper, people may not remember what you said but, will remember how positive you were and struck up a conversation with them. Asking those 3 items questions on slow work day, can really turn someone’s day around.
you’re honestly right, i didn’t think about that. we might not be remembered by what we’ve said but we will be remembered by how we’ve made people feel. i feel that that's all the more reason to make sure that what we say matters.
Looking forward to the day this legal drama ends. Then I can move into a home without surveillance cameras in every room. And purchase a phone that is NOT HACKED. And get my mail without interference. Wow! Meanwhile I do talk out loud to work thru personal issues, and I do pray out loud, and I will continue to talk to my cat. To all those surveilling me, enjoy your karma. Maybe you'll also enjoy court justice as well. Yes, I live in the USA, and though I have done nothing to hurt anyone, government entities allow my home to be surveilled. Thank, Covenant, and thanks to th3 3 letter agency that installed cameras. Cheers! great vid! 🙂🙃
Whenever I ask someone a personal question and they ask briefly, it is not felt the information is withholded, but rather the person is speaking with confidence for their own value. There is no room to overexplain yourself or dive into details when you are calm and hold strong self belief.
i strive to reach this effortless level of saying just enough to where i appear to be approachable and inviting but not so much where the average person can say they know me.
I feel that I communicate a lot when it comes down to the people that I am most most comfort with. I started to be overshare as I got older and before I wouldn't really talk to anyone, but now it was like a ongoing thing. I'm learning to keep things to myself so that that vulnerability won't be as exposed.
there definitely is something to be said about finding a balance and it sounds like you're on your way to knowing what works for you. i hope you find it :)
i'm grateful to have come to this conclusion when i did. i feel as though it will save me a lot of trouble down the line. hopefully with this video others learn it sooner !
Hey Jose, I like your message, especially the take-away of sharing your successes and not your dreams with tertiary characters in our lives. I think dream sharing should be reserved only for the handful of closest people in our lives...and maybe not even them. Maybe nurture our dream out of its diapers first and show it off when it starts walking on its own!
New follower here, love this video so much!! Time to overshare with my own example just because you're so right 😂 I had a "friend" who tried to undermine my confidence right before I started a college program. I'd been hyping them up for ten yrs. It was really shocking and hurtful. Some ppl will try to sabotage your goals simply because they're unhappy in their own lives. Now if I sense any jealousy or envy from someone, I don't share my plans or success stories. Makes me appreciate the ppl who do celebrate with me and genuinely wanna see me succeed.
this probably happens a lot more often than we might think but we don't want to admit it. i'm glad you learned to share the stuff you want with the people who matter to you.
it's def applicable to me, but I'm not much of a talker and keep things to myself a little too much, so it's nice to understand your POV! amazing colorization btw (:
Great video bro, your energy is refreshing and you have the "it" factor. I found out why most times we find it difficult to answer like where we are working or presently at, is because we are dissatisfied with it but it's okay to be content in whatever season you find yourself because life is progress when you choose it to be. I don't overshare and I avoid people that do if I can. You have an inviting spirit, please don't second guess yourself. You have what it takes to become whatever your heart desires. On a personal note, you are attractive in whatever style your hair is in but I feel like the all-out or untidy hair do (for lack of a better term) like the hairstyle in the first few clips of the video, fits you much better and you seem more relaxed and unbothered. My two sense.
I feel you, I think when I was younger, I would often feel kind of inadequate because I asked questions that I personally would have given in-depth answers for, only to get a monosyllabic response. Sometimes it would even make me a bit frustrated, too. But when I started working in customer service I learned how to interact with people in a polite and short manner, often listening to them yap as well, I ultimately learned to just listen, no yapping. What a relief! when i watch your videos i feel like we’re just having a conversation and it’s so fun, so chill, the lines of thought you go through are so interesting to explore! loved it since the first vid, great job!
it’s so fun listening to others, especially when they talk about something they’re genuinely interested in or passionate about. but i’ve also been learning to let the silence settle, and it’s been nice getting used to just being in that moment. thank you so much for your kind words.!!! this is honestly what i aim for so i’m very glad to see you say this :)
Thanx for this. I related. I deleted all my Vn. I offeted over share to wrong person and end up then trying to correct the misconception they made ans get aggregated by how they c misunderstood so bab. Then relise the twist the stiry to suit their narrative if who i am to win a past arguments. I end up fight over facts of my own life! Then i have to talk to others and over explain so i dont get misunderstood afa. Its exhausting. I just VN myself now
I appreciate your perspective on this & your honesty. I've definitely overshared a lot and have seen & FELT that negative energy from oversharing. But I also believe God made it part of my purpose to be vulnerable, to be a living testimony through my music & my words for those who can relate. I've self-harmed & was suicidal for most of my life. I have scars all over my body- my life story is pretty much written all over me whether I want to share it or not. I believe it's all for a higher purpose, it's all part of God's plan. That's why I actually honor being vulnerable because I might just be saving a life by genuinely wearing my heart on my sleeve & sharing my story. I might just be oversharing to the right person at the right time, you know? BUT, I know I do not need to tell everyone every single detail of my life. Learning to balance when to share and when not to, and how much to share, is definitely important. But as long as I keep God at the forefront and stay aware of myself, that's all that matters. I pray on it before I do anything. Btw, I am not religious, I believe LOVE is the true religion. God is love. Thank you for whoever read this. And thank you for making this video!!! God bless us all 🙏♥️ (I might’ve overshared in this whole comment but yolo LOL)
I tend to overshare a lot, and it's something I'm trying to change. I recently learned about "trauma bonding," , and I think that's my oversharing style (?) ahah. I've just started my podcast here as well and I0m really enjoying the process and the little improvements, but haven't told anyone yet... good luck with your channel, I subscribed!
great vid, bro. thing is, a bit more indepth: oversharing is , as you hinted at, "people pleaser" behavior - but deeply rooted to trauma. victims of childhood SA are always prone to overshare / "confession mode" because of supermassive guilt and "i must be a good person or else i get punished" hyper-rationality. but you know, people themselves are the best therapy for oversharing and being a blabbermouth. once what you told in confidence was used against you publically, once the secret thing you worked on was stolen from you and used for someone elses advantage, that kinda BS....you'll learn quickly. also, not to mention the nr 1 irrational thought: that it doesnt matter what "the others" think and know of you, and that most people just really dont care unless youre making yourself so hot right now unnecessarily.
thank you, i'm glad you liked it! you make some interesting points; while i don't think this is the case for most, there is something to be said about that being the reality for some people. in general, i feel as though it’s all about finding a balance between being able to share authentically and keeping some things private for your own well-being especially when, as you said, people aren't paying nearly as much attention as we think.
This is such a good video! I just found you in my feed. You should do a video on how to stay consistent in content creation or something like that 😁 (it would help me loads) have a blessed day!
thank you! this is a good idea for sure and i'll definitely keep it in mind, i just wish i could be able to speak on it. making videos is such a fun and creative outlet for me but the number one issue i run into is finding the time to create as well as having the confidence to know that what i want to make is good. maybe after a couple of weeks of posting more i'll have a different opinion on the matter but until then i'm just faking it until i make it lol. hope that helps :)
You are gorgeous, and you're one of those guys that will keep getting more handsome as the years pass. Thank you for the courage to start your channel, may you experience success!
Hey man, I loved watching this video and the meaning and explanation you gave. It's so nice how you explain oversharing. Much love man, keep up the good work!
Great video bro, this is really good advice👏 It is really important to carefully pick who you share what with. I've been taking youtube seriously posting every week for the last 9 months but I've only told 3 people I know because I don't want the negative comments of ppl I know crushing the process
“Even a fool, when he holdeth his peace, is counted wise: And he that shutteth his lips is esteemed a man of understanding.” Proverbs 17:28 You seem very mature for your age, God's blessings on you now & forever :)
amen. hopefully i am blessed and fortunate enough to have my goals realized. but you know what they say, "we make plans and god laughs." i guess we shall see.
Great video, I can see a need for this information in today’s society and going forward. This could help mental health and set up proper boundaries for conversations and relationships.
Yoo I need to learn this sh*t so bad. Went thru a really bad breakup in December and I've just been oversharing with everyone at work because I am so lonely and just want to feel understood but I've been working on this recently. And I've been feeling better keeping my mouth shut but got a long way to go. Thanks for the video!
In the first few seconds of the video, I was like “yep definitely an extrovert” 🤣 I give you props for being able to make small talk. Love the style and filters of your videos. I’m super introverted, but I when it comes to my interests/passions I don’t shut up 💀🤣 It also depends on who I’m talking to. I also value meaningful & deep conversations. Keep shining 🌟 you’re a light
haha thank you. i get what you mean, when it comes to something you're interested in even the most quiet of people can't help but share. i appreciate you saying this
I had some people ask me how much I make per year because the job title is controversial. Absolutely none of their business! And I will make the situation awkward for them for even asking 😂😂
the nerve on them is crazy, even though this is something i would probably ask lol. i think it depends on the person. if we're close i would want to share/have them share for wage transparency purposes. BUT... it doesn't sound like that's your case so yeah; making it awkward sounds like the right approach - teach them not to mess with you! you gotta find it funny how people get curious at things that have nothing to do with them. keep doing you!
such a high quality video man, you seem so chill everything you say just feels like a really wise internal monologue hahah, amazing color grading as well!
that's so nice of you to say, thank you! i have no idea what i'm doing when it comes to color grading and editing (i feel like i just make myself look like an orange most of the time) but i love that you think it looks good haha.
I found your video by chance on RUclips, and just wanted to say that it was exactly what you need to hear. I needed this so bad. Best greetings from Brazil!
Definitely a yapper. But I will say the person who asks those questions help to keep work from being a drag. I ask them and enjoy when others ask, and yeah, sometimes I do remember those small details about them. I agree it's hard to balance for me sometimes, when people provide quick answers with no details, the conversation ends up being dry and boring.
you’re definitely right that it’s all about finding a balance. i’m still trying to figure out when to strike up a conversation and when to just zip it. but i do know that when i speak, i want it to matter. glad to know that work isn't boring when you're there :)
As a person that is somewhat socially awkward, I love yappers…that also know to listen. But sometimes when it comes time for me to respond my mind goes completely blank. So I just end up nodding or saying yeah. Like I am interested and all ears. Like please tell me what this is! And also tell anything
mmmm. i would say that's the other side of the coin. sometimes someone will be saying something and when they finish i could tell that it's my turn to respond but i genuinely have no idea what to say! but that's usually not the case for me, it's mostly the opposite - i'm ready for my turn to speak!
I am a certified yapper. I agree with almost everything you say here. Specifically what you are saying with sharing accomplishments. Allowing people to influence your dreams, aspirations, or goals negatively is the most detrimental thing to personal growth PERIOD. That being said, I do disagree a little with your argument against 'small talk' or hypotheticals. I think asking interesting and fun questions might seem uneventful and non-impactful to people who are used to communicating complex things regularly, but to people who have issues communicating or opening up they can be a serious gateway to eventful conversation. Great video though!
thank you! i feel as though we’re on the same page; i love me a good hypothetical question and i think that small talk is prerequisite for establishing the the necessary comfort and familiarity needed for more personal and intimate dialogue. what i was trying to get at is that, at a certain point, you have to ask yourself if you’re asking these questions because you want to know more about how the other person thinks or if you’re just bored; are you telling someone aspects of your life because you want to enjoy a conversation or because you’re bored of the silence? nothing bad can come from speaking thoughtlessly. but nothing good can come from speaking without intention.
Americans love to judge other Americans by the job they work at. A guy I knew was a cashier for 6 years then quit because he graduated and became a doctor. Now he makes 300K a year.
i aim to be able to move in silence like that! i'm not opposed to giving people a glimpse of what i'm doing/want to do, but just a little, not the whole thing.
bein a yapper is positive, makes others dream, have to be cautious tho hahaha dont want to hurt no one but rather find a place to dream during lifes boredom
thank you! i think the first one is called "aves" by ennio mano and the second is "you and yourself" by nocturnal spirits. this type of music is definitely a vibe and i wish more people were into it
Hey jose , really nice video ! I was wondering if I could help you with more Quality Editing in your videos and also make a highly engaging Thumbnail and also help you with the overall youtube strategy and growth ! Pls let me know what do you think ?
This was so relatable! I tend to talk too much when I don't socialize often. It's a gift & a curse because sometimes I have no filter and feel guilty af after.I'm a work in progress though 🥲
I have overshared a lot in my life and I often walk away from conversations feeling uncomfortable with what I have said.
i've been there a couple times and it's so awkward! i am learning however, to take a few seconds and ask myself if i am saying too much and that usually helps.
I can tell when RUclips channels with very little subscribers are going to take off, and this is one of them. Keep at it brother.
this means a lot, honestly. thank you for saying that!
Fs!! The quality, The way he speak, his charisma, he will take off fs
I agree
The paradox I feel is that we're living in the era of getting paid to "be ourselves" but we simultaneously have to set boundaries with said audience/people group. I think reality TV shows have played a huge part in the over-sharing culture, but as with all things fame/popularity, it can destroy those who don't set the boundaries.
yes, that's definitely part of it. what you're talking about is certainly the balancing act that (aspiring) content creators find themselves facing when dealing with a following of any size. what's interesting to me is that even people who are not pursuing a career in content creation voluntarily disclose information about themselves that would otherwise be considered private or deeply personal, with little to no incentive; they don't stand to gain social capital or monetary compensation divulging this information yet they do so regardless, and that makes no sense to me.
This was insightful. As a D1 yapper myself I honestly hate that awkward feeling I get when I get home and replay the conversations. Learning to listen more currently. 😊 Keep the videos coming
i'm sad to say i know the feeling all too well. it's so cringe! but that's why you gotta take a second to think before you say what you might regret in a couple of hours. you got this!
I think it only makes sense to share your ambitions with people who have similar ambitions.
gonna try and piggyback off of this by saying yes, and maybe you can include people who might want to know but don't necessarily share the ambition? i wouldn't tell my barber about my goals because i don't think he cares at all (and i don't expect him to). but i would want to share this desire to build a youtube channel with some of my friends, who have no ambition of doing anything in content creation but i guarantee want to support me in my endeavors (they just don't know what those endeavors are because i'm annoyingly secretive about it).
there is a benefit to sharing your ambitions with people of like minds but don't forget to keep in mind those who would love to cheer you on.
I agree! When I told people my dreams I never pursued them because I almost got the dopamine telling them and then they’d ask about it and I’d feel awful for not starting it.
Great channel looking forward to seeing it grow!
that is for sure something that makes me think twice before telling someone what my goals are. but honestly something else that holds me back is that it'll be more rewarding to tell them when i've done it instead of telling them that i'm striving for it.
i appreciate you saying this :)
i used to do this all the time! and to stop that cycle of not pursuing my goals, I wrote out a list of what i wanted to accomplish and did not share it with anyone. no pics/updates on social media, saying very little in social circles, nothing. making moves in silence is my motto because my goals are for me and if i continued that path of letting everyone know what i am doing or what i'd like to do then it was like i was doing it for their acknowledgment and not myself. hope things work out for you :)
social media training you to be vulnerable to get close to people is real
it is, and the hard part is to fight the urge to not do so!
great video! i def have an issue with oversharing and then i get uncomfortable when people ask about it later like "oh you said you wanted to move to ___ how is that coming along?". i need to remember to share accomplishments, not dreams.
thank you :)
Guard your thoughts because not all are meant for sharing.
As Lao Tzu wisely said, 'Those who know do not speak. Those who speak do not know.'
Preserve your energy and wisdom for those who truly value them.
words for someone to live by
I definitely have to watch myself on oversharing.
you'll get the hang of it, just wait !
This room is vibey
why thank you! i’m glad you like it
On the theme of oversharing: I was told to share less because people don't care. At first that stung. Now it makes sense. Your words helped me understand protecting my endeavors. Establishing boundaries are not easy, but I am learning. Thank you. Keep working hard.
i'm glad you were able to get something out of my video. thank you for saying this, i will continue to work hard :)
I would say there is a value to keeping cards close from being judged or dismissed. I will say if you’re a yapper, people may not remember what you said but, will remember how positive you were and struck up a conversation with them. Asking those 3 items questions on slow work day, can really turn someone’s day around.
you’re honestly right, i didn’t think about that. we might not be remembered by what we’ve said but we will be remembered by how we’ve made people feel. i feel that that's all the more reason to make sure that what we say matters.
Thanks for the content!! Appreciate you! Keep going this is a GREAT CHANNEL💪😎YOU'VE GOT THIS
thank you for saying that! appreciate you saying this :)
😅😅 thank you for the advice. I been told by people be careful who i tell my business too.
you're so welcome. the people who told you that are right.
Looking forward to the day this legal drama ends. Then I can move into a home without surveillance cameras in every room. And purchase a phone that is NOT HACKED. And get my mail without interference. Wow! Meanwhile I do talk out loud to work thru personal issues, and I do pray out loud, and I will continue to talk to my cat. To all those surveilling me, enjoy your karma. Maybe you'll also enjoy court justice as well. Yes, I live in the USA, and though I have done nothing to hurt anyone, government entities allow my home to be surveilled. Thank, Covenant, and thanks to th3 3 letter agency that installed cameras. Cheers! great vid! 🙂🙃
Whenever I ask someone a personal question and they ask briefly, it is not felt the information is withholded, but rather the person is speaking with confidence for their own value. There is no room to overexplain yourself or dive into details when you are calm and hold strong self belief.
i strive to reach this effortless level of saying just enough to where i appear to be approachable and inviting but not so much where the average person can say they know me.
I feel that I communicate a lot when it comes down to the people that I am most most comfort with. I started to be overshare as I got older and before I wouldn't really talk to anyone, but now it was like a ongoing thing. I'm learning to keep things to myself so that that vulnerability won't be as exposed.
there definitely is something to be said about finding a balance and it sounds like you're on your way to knowing what works for you. i hope you find it :)
I’ve been an open book since my 20’s. It’s wise of you to mull all this over!
i'm grateful to have come to this conclusion when i did. i feel as though it will save me a lot of trouble down the line. hopefully with this video others learn it sooner !
Considering all the noise on RUclips, I'm glad I got to watch this video. Needed to hear this at this time, a gem indeed. Subscribed.
i'm also glad and am grateful that you found it useful. thank you so much!
this video was the perfect reminder for me to protect my peace lol. thanks for a dope video keep it up man great stuff!
thank you! i will
First youtuber to ever mean their words...
You could tell by his eyes
i try to. thank you for saying that :)
Your Channel Will Grow Someday, The Color, Lighting, your hair are fitting so well with the Vibe. I hope the best to you too
thank you! i appreciate it
Hey Jose, I like your message, especially the take-away of sharing your successes and not your dreams with tertiary characters in our lives. I think dream sharing should be reserved only for the handful of closest people in our lives...and maybe not even them. Maybe nurture our dream out of its diapers first and show it off when it starts walking on its own!
what an interesting metaphor lol. in any case, i wholeheartedly agree
New follower here, love this video so much!! Time to overshare with my own example just because you're so right 😂 I had a "friend" who tried to undermine my confidence right before I started a college program. I'd been hyping them up for ten yrs. It was really shocking and hurtful. Some ppl will try to sabotage your goals simply because they're unhappy in their own lives. Now if I sense any jealousy or envy from someone, I don't share my plans or success stories. Makes me appreciate the ppl who do celebrate with me and genuinely wanna see me succeed.
this probably happens a lot more often than we might think but we don't want to admit it. i'm glad you learned to share the stuff you want with the people who matter to you.
Great video, always check where you get validation from. 671 subscribers will become 671,000 very soon bro keep it up.
this is so kind of you to say, thank you. i hope so and can't wait!
it's def applicable to me, but I'm not much of a talker and keep things to myself a little too much, so it's nice to understand your POV! amazing colorization btw (:
i'm glad i can shed some light on how it's like on the other side lol and i'm glad you enjoyed even though i have no idea what i'm doing :)
i started content after watching your videos. keep it up
i love that. i will, and i hope i can continue to steer others towards doing what it is that they want!
finally another D1 yapper i can listen to when im working, thank you youtube algorithm!
Great video bro, your energy is refreshing and you have the "it" factor. I found out why most times we find it difficult to answer like where we are working or presently at, is because we are dissatisfied with it but it's okay to be content in whatever season you find yourself because life is progress when you choose it to be. I don't overshare and I avoid people that do if I can. You have an inviting spirit, please don't second guess yourself. You have what it takes to become whatever your heart desires. On a personal note, you are attractive in whatever style your hair is in but I feel like the all-out or untidy hair do (for lack of a better term) like the hairstyle in the first few clips of the video, fits you much better and you seem more relaxed and unbothered. My two sense.
i appreciate you sayin that. thank you for your kind words :)
THIS IS WHAT IVE BEEN TRTING TO TELL PEOPLE! Another sub for you brother
thank you ! appreciate it :)
this lighting or color correction or whatever magic your doing is so nice to look at!!!
jose dont trust this comment, you have terrible lightning
@@BusideaList LOL ok tbf i dont know nothing about nothing but i like it!!!! jose dont trust anyone!!! ;)
i honestly have no idea what i'm doing but i'm very glad you like it. thank you!
I feel you, I think when I was younger, I would often feel kind of inadequate because I asked questions that I personally would have given in-depth answers for, only to get a monosyllabic response. Sometimes it would even make me a bit frustrated, too. But when I started working in customer service I learned how to interact with people in a polite and short manner, often listening to them yap as well, I ultimately learned to just listen, no yapping. What a relief!
when i watch your videos i feel like we’re just having a conversation and it’s so fun, so chill, the lines of thought you go through are so interesting to explore!
loved it since the first vid, great job!
it’s so fun listening to others, especially when they talk about something they’re genuinely interested in or passionate about. but i’ve also been learning to let the silence settle, and it’s been nice getting used to just being in that moment.
thank you so much for your kind words.!!! this is honestly what i aim for so i’m very glad to see you say this :)
Thanx for this. I related. I deleted all my Vn. I offeted over share to wrong person and end up then trying to correct the misconception they made ans get aggregated by how they c misunderstood so bab. Then relise the twist the stiry to suit their narrative if who i am to win a past arguments. I end up fight over facts of my own life! Then i have to talk to others and over explain so i dont get misunderstood afa. Its exhausting. I just VN myself now
good on you for learning not to tell people what they don't need to know.
Keep going bro I’m on the same journey and I feel the same way!!
you got this!
I appreciate your perspective on this & your honesty. I've definitely overshared a lot and have seen & FELT that negative energy from oversharing.
But I also believe God made it part of my purpose to be vulnerable, to be a living testimony through my music & my words for those who can relate.
I've self-harmed & was suicidal for most of my life. I have scars all over my body- my life story is pretty much written all over me whether I want to share it or not. I believe it's all for a higher purpose, it's all part of God's plan. That's why I actually honor being vulnerable because I might just be saving a life by genuinely wearing my heart on my sleeve & sharing my story. I might just be oversharing to the right person at the right time, you know?
BUT, I know I do not need to tell everyone every single detail of my life. Learning to balance when to share and when not to, and how much to share, is definitely important. But as long as I keep God at the forefront and stay aware of myself, that's all that matters. I pray on it before I do anything.
Btw, I am not religious, I believe LOVE is the true religion. God is love.
Thank you for whoever read this. And thank you for making this video!!! God bless us all 🙏♥️
(I might’ve overshared in this whole comment but yolo LOL)
definitely oversharing but very lovely testimony. thank you for sharing that, i hope it reaches whoever it is you want it to
Wow this video is exactly what I needed. I always over share… also this video was clipped perfectly and I loved the speed :)
thank you. i'm glad you liked it :)
I tend to overshare a lot, and it's something I'm trying to change. I recently learned about "trauma bonding," , and I think that's my oversharing style (?) ahah. I've just started my podcast here as well and I0m really enjoying the process and the little improvements, but haven't told anyone yet... good luck with your channel, I subscribed!
thank you! i wish you luck on your endeavors and hope it gets to a point where you're shouting it from the rooftops
great vid, bro. thing is, a bit more indepth: oversharing is , as you hinted at, "people pleaser" behavior - but deeply rooted to trauma. victims of childhood SA are always prone to overshare / "confession mode" because of supermassive guilt and "i must be a good person or else i get punished" hyper-rationality.
but you know, people themselves are the best therapy for oversharing and being a blabbermouth. once what you told in confidence was used against you publically, once the secret thing you worked on was stolen from you and used for someone elses advantage, that kinda BS....you'll learn quickly.
also, not to mention the nr 1 irrational thought: that it doesnt matter what "the others" think and know of you, and that most people just really dont care unless youre making yourself so hot right now unnecessarily.
thank you, i'm glad you liked it! you make some interesting points; while i don't think this is the case for most, there is something to be said about that being the reality for some people. in general, i feel as though it’s all about finding a balance between being able to share authentically and keeping some things private for your own well-being especially when, as you said, people aren't paying nearly as much attention as we think.
just subscribed. i like you! and i like the point of this video a lot, i was just feeling this way as another oversharer and came across this
thank you for the sub! i hope you stick around :)
This is such a good video! I just found you in my feed. You should do a video on how to stay consistent in content creation or something like that 😁 (it would help me loads) have a blessed day!
thank you! this is a good idea for sure and i'll definitely keep it in mind, i just wish i could be able to speak on it. making videos is such a fun and creative outlet for me but the number one issue i run into is finding the time to create as well as having the confidence to know that what i want to make is good.
maybe after a couple of weeks of posting more i'll have a different opinion on the matter but until then i'm just faking it until i make it lol. hope that helps :)
@@yesiamjose fake it til you make it… write that down, WRITE THAT DOWN
Good video, very aesthetically pleasing room
thank you and thank you.
You are gorgeous, and you're one of those guys that will keep getting more handsome as the years pass. Thank you for the courage to start your channel, may you experience success!
why thank you. that's so nice to hear
Hey man, I loved watching this video and the meaning and explanation you gave. It's so nice how you explain oversharing. Much love man, keep up the good work!
much appreciated. i'm glad you liked it. thank you for your kind words, i'll try my hardest to do great work :)
here before you will blow up!!!!
these kinds of comments really make my day. i'm excited for us to see that day come.
@@yesiamjose YESSS!! keep it up
Great video bro, this is really good advice👏
It is really important to carefully pick who you share what with. I've been taking youtube seriously posting every week for the last 9 months but I've only told 3 people I know because I don't want the negative comments of ppl I know crushing the process
thank you! i hope it's been going well for you thus far.
“Even a fool, when he holdeth his peace, is counted wise: And he that shutteth his lips is esteemed a man of understanding.”
Proverbs 17:28
You seem very mature for your age, God's blessings on you now & forever :)
amen. hopefully i am blessed and fortunate enough to have my goals realized. but you know what they say, "we make plans and god laughs." i guess we shall see.
love your vids!
thank you! hopefully i can always make something for you to enjoy
Great video, I can see a need for this information in today’s society and going forward. This could help mental health and set up proper boundaries for conversations and relationships.
thank you !
Yoo I need to learn this sh*t so bad. Went thru a really bad breakup in December and I've just been oversharing with everyone at work because I am so lonely and just want to feel understood but I've been working on this recently. And I've been feeling better keeping my mouth shut but got a long way to go. Thanks for the video!
i hope whatever journey you're on you come out a better person because of it. glad i was able to help !
Dude ur energy is amazing. Keep it up man. Love it
this is more encouraging than you might think. thank you for saying that, i will
In the first few seconds of the video, I was like “yep definitely an extrovert” 🤣 I give you props for being able to make small talk. Love the style and filters of your videos.
I’m super introverted, but I when it comes to my interests/passions I don’t shut up 💀🤣 It also depends on who I’m talking to. I also value meaningful & deep conversations.
Keep shining 🌟 you’re a light
haha thank you. i get what you mean, when it comes to something you're interested in even the most quiet of people can't help but share. i appreciate you saying this
Jose you are so authentic in what you are saying. Keep going!
thank you, i appreciate it. i will and hopefully keep giving you reasons to say this
Love bro❤
thanks bro :)
Subbed bc this is real . Hope to see more fulfilling advice and videos. Its dope to see other ppl w the same mindset ...very reassurin
thank you! i'm glad we can agree and i hope to continue to please :)
Your channel has already helped me so so much, thank you.
so glad i've been able to help in any way!
❤️🔥 this was Fire and enlightening
it's so funny you say that because before i uploaded it i was sure it was going to be the worst thing i've made. thank you for your kind words :)
I had some people ask me how much I make per year because the job title is controversial. Absolutely none of their business! And I will make the situation awkward for them for even asking 😂😂
the nerve on them is crazy, even though this is something i would probably ask lol. i think it depends on the person. if we're close i would want to share/have them share for wage transparency purposes. BUT... it doesn't sound like that's your case so yeah; making it awkward sounds like the right approach - teach them not to mess with you! you gotta find it funny how people get curious at things that have nothing to do with them. keep doing you!
such a high quality video man, you seem so chill everything you say just feels like a really wise internal monologue hahah, amazing color grading as well!
that's so nice of you to say, thank you! i have no idea what i'm doing when it comes to color grading and editing (i feel like i just make myself look like an orange most of the time) but i love that you think it looks good haha.
I found your video by chance on RUclips, and just wanted to say that it was exactly what you need to hear. I needed this so bad. Best greetings from Brazil!
obrigado! i'm glad you liked the message.
Here to help you grow 😊 I like you, I'm gonna stay. Sending love from Poland 🫶🏻😇
HELLOOOO! appreciate it. i hope i can keep making things that you'll enjoy :)
Thank you for making this video. It helps me a lot. 🤗
i'm so glad i was able to help
Loose lips sink ships 😂great vid!
someone recently told me "speak only if it improves upon the silence” and that's one i wanna take to heart. thank you!!!
Definitely a yapper. But I will say the person who asks those questions help to keep work from being a drag. I ask them and enjoy when others ask, and yeah, sometimes I do remember those small details about them. I agree it's hard to balance for me sometimes, when people provide quick answers with no details, the conversation ends up being dry and boring.
you’re definitely right that it’s all about finding a balance. i’m still trying to figure out when to strike up a conversation and when to just zip it. but i do know that when i speak, i want it to matter. glad to know that work isn't boring when you're there :)
This is insanely good! You'll be huge in no time :)
comments like this are what make me want to keep going, thank you :))
Keep it up brother
appreciate it. i'm just getting started!
Great video! ✨
i'm glad you like it!
I realized I too am D1 yapper
it's overall a net positive.
As a person that is somewhat socially awkward, I love yappers…that also know to listen. But sometimes when it comes time for me to respond my mind goes completely blank. So I just end up nodding or saying yeah. Like I am interested and all ears. Like please tell me what this is! And also tell anything
mmmm. i would say that's the other side of the coin. sometimes someone will be saying something and when they finish i could tell that it's my turn to respond but i genuinely have no idea what to say! but that's usually not the case for me, it's mostly the opposite - i'm ready for my turn to speak!
i needed this so bad. tysm! subscribed
i'm glad i was able to help :) thank you!!
this video is amazing :)
thank you!!!
Just found out your channel ❤I love it 😂you have a new subie here ❤❤
thank you so much! i hope you stick around :)
40 subs is crazy. we should get that up
don't gas me up!!! it'll go straight to my head lol. but thank you, thank you
I am a certified yapper.
I agree with almost everything you say here. Specifically what you are saying with sharing accomplishments. Allowing people to influence your dreams, aspirations, or goals negatively is the most detrimental thing to personal growth PERIOD.
That being said, I do disagree a little with your argument against 'small talk' or hypotheticals. I think asking interesting and fun questions might seem uneventful and non-impactful to people who are used to communicating complex things regularly, but to people who have issues communicating or opening up they can be a serious gateway to eventful conversation.
Great video though!
thank you! i feel as though we’re on the same page; i love me a good hypothetical question and i think that small talk is prerequisite for establishing the the necessary comfort and familiarity needed for more personal and intimate dialogue.
what i was trying to get at is that, at a certain point, you have to ask yourself if you’re asking these questions because you want to know more about how the other person thinks or if you’re just bored; are you telling someone aspects of your life because you want to enjoy a conversation or because you’re bored of the silence? nothing bad can come from speaking thoughtlessly. but nothing good can come from speaking without intention.
Hey bro, great channel, keep it going
i plan to :) thank you for your kind words!
I have a problem with this truly
it'll get better
Americans love to judge other Americans by the job they work at. A guy I knew was a cashier for 6 years then quit because he graduated and became a doctor. Now he makes 300K a year.
i aim to be able to move in silence like that! i'm not opposed to giving people a glimpse of what i'm doing/want to do, but just a little, not the whole thing.
Didn't expect the sub count, keep it up.
i will. i hope you keep watching!
descript has a great feature for taking a video where youre looking at the camera and centers it so it looks like youre looking where you need to
thanks for the advice. i'll look into it
bein a yapper is positive, makes others dream, have to be cautious tho hahaha dont want to hurt no one but rather find a place to dream during lifes boredom
this is exactly what i'm trying to say. the hard part is finding that balance
Just subbed, ur good vibes
appreciate it!
Great video!
thank you so much, i'm glad you liked it
wich songs u used in this video? they very chillin
thank you! i think the first one is called "aves" by ennio mano and the second is "you and yourself" by nocturnal spirits. this type of music is definitely a vibe and i wish more people were into it
@@yesiamjose appreciate it bro, love ur content
Also what mic are you using, ive been looking into buying a new one lol😂
i use the rode wireless go ii. honestly though, make sure you do your research because i cannot tell you whole heartedly that i recommend it.
Always been told ima D1 yapper 😅
i have as well, in both a positive and negative way lol.
I can only see 4 videos on yoir channel - this isnt actually your 4th video on RUclips - is it?
this is!
@@yesiamjose wow - you look like you've been doing this for longer man, well done
@@yesiamjoseincredible. You beat the algorithm 🎉
Are you Brazilian, Jesus? Thanks for the video, I loved it and I am subscribed now.
i am not brazillian mas eu adoraria aprender portugues. thank you for the sub!
this is interesting, you should make a podcast on Spotify!
i've been told i have a podcast voice. but i feel as though my voice is severely monotone and would end up having people fall asleep lol.
@@yesiamjosenot true. You have a great voice and tone
lightskin gyllenhaal be spitting icl
if you're calling me a lightskin gyllenhaal i'm honored lol
I’m not a yapper however you made some solid points. Sub to follow your journey 🎉
appreciate it!
Hey jose , really nice video ! I was wondering if I could help you with more Quality Editing in your videos and also make a highly engaging Thumbnail and also help you with the overall youtube strategy and growth ! Pls let me know what do you think ?
This was so relatable! I tend to talk too much when I don't socialize often. It's a gift & a curse because sometimes I have no filter and feel guilty af after.I'm a work in progress though 🥲
i'm in the same boat as you! each day i get better though and i'm glad it's the same for you :)