I had to go no contact with my mom after I got married and she started constantly fighting with my wife. Best decision I ever made. Realized how manipulative and abusive she was my whole life. If someone is in the same situation, leave and dont look back. If someone offers no positivity to your life, they don't need to be a part of it.
That's wrong man. That's your mother and you need to respect her no matter what! She carried you for nine months and fed and clothed you and probably gave you shit you didn't need. You're an ungrateful person and you choose some woman over your own flesh and blood? You're THAT whipped? Sad. This is why I hate millennials y'all think the world owes you shit . Wtf poor mother.
@@K-9-DFW it really depends. Of course run if youve got a drugged adict mum or abusive mum and crap. Manipulative to me doesnt do as much damage as the drugs addict, neglecting, heck some parents torture their own kids.
@@K-9-DFW Idk. My biological mom(I was adopted by my step mom) would use manipulation constantly. I never noticed until she showed up at my house one day and she shoved my wife down in a low key argument. I told her to leave because violence in not cool and my kids where there also. She wouldn't apologize so I told her I'm done. Years later and here I am, life is so much better with less drama because she's gone. Looking back I realized she siphoned my money(mom was over my banking)because I would go on deployments and come back broke. The first deployment after that I came home to thousands my wife saved up for my return. Sometimes if a person is toxic you just have to cut them out. Blood or not.
Still remember the day lol. Literally ran out the door with a backpack on, told my mother I was leaving- she laughed and then I bolted. She ran after me, I got into a car with a friend and we sped away. At one point I had dropped my phone and had to pick it up and see her face as she was catching up. A lot of phone calls afterwards from everyone who knew me. Seriously so dramatic all the way around. Never went back though, it's been over 5 years.
I don't even know what you or your mom look like, but picturing a woman running and almost catching up to you after you dropped your phone...seems pretty terrifying 😳
Unironically that's how most people end up learning, especially people raised by boomers who rather yell at you for not knowing how to do stuff you were never taught
@@merlink.7287 yep would get yelled at for the littlest things so i would just try to figure things out myself then when the internet became a thing, it became my new parent lol
To those who had to leave home for your own safety and mental health, I hope you're all doing well and are better off. You can't pick your bio family, but you get to pick your friends/new family.
You know what's keeping me home? *Fear.* The fear of my mother forcing me home, not realizing that I wasn't depressed during the summer, and it was because I was with dad. She hasn't had the brutal realization that I'm depressed because of her. I don't respect this crazy, sick, twisted woman, I FEAR this woman. I'd love to go into details about her, but then we'd be here for a year.
It took me nearly a decade to get where I am now, but I ran away from an abusive home the day after I graduated high school. I just finished nursing school this summer and am about to start my career in my dream specialty in January. Leaving home that young was one of the scariest things I ever had to do, but it was a decision I'll never regret. I sincerely believe that I would've been dead within the year had I stayed.
I ran away once but the police got me and now no one is willing to do it with me and I'm scared I will be kidnapped or something like that since I'm pretty stupid. If I was braver and smarter than I would leave this fucking place.
I had taken in a fifteen year old runaway boy. He was a friend of my nephew and had been living on the streets. I went through children and youth so he could stay with me for awhile. He told me when he was 9 his younger sister was hit by a car and killed. His mother abused him and said to him why couldn't you have died instead. She was supposed to be a Christian and had been emotionally damaged. As to why I a single male would go through the trouble of taking in a strange teenage legally. Well when I was a teenager a friend of mine was abused by his father and ran away from home. He lived on the streets for a year. When he turned sixteen he drowned in a swimming accident. He never got to live a full life. My nephews friend wasn't going to die on the streets not if I could help it!
It's very interesting the first time you stand up for yourself to an abusive parent. My mom never hit me, but she was really verbally and emotionally abusive. She made my sister have panic attacks. One day when I turned 18-19, while she was screaming at us, I had enough and just stood up and shouted for her to fucking stop. The look on her face was genuine shock. Because I was not only taller than her now, but I could also scream louder than her. There were a few rough years as I was figuring out what to do next, but we've since sat down and had several conversations about the messed up things that happened during my childhood. She's admitted wholeheartedly that she made a lot of mistakes as a parent and I've forgiven her. I know not everyone has a story that ends this nicely, but I hope any of you who are going through abuse learn to stand up for yourself or manage to get away. Stay strong.
Be careful. My mother 'admitted 'to me that she messed up, but her actions didn't change and became worse than ever so I ghosted her anyway. She might just be trying to con you into keeping her around.
@@ashraile That's too bad that things didn't improve with you and your mother, but I'm glad you were able to get away from her all the same. If they're not going to change for the better, then yeah, have nothing to do with them.
@@ashraile This was years ago now and we've had a great relationship since. Sorry that happened-- sometimes parents will use admission to just manipulate you more.
I remember the first time I started defending myself against my violently abusive mother, I shoved her away from me and she was so shocked it was actually funny.
Ah, when you try to stand up for yourself and the abusive parent whines how you've 'changed'. No shit I've changed, dad, I realised I was worth more than being your plaything.
@@aerialace3084 Oof. Been there. My sperm donor told me during an argument that I'd changed. I - a fucking 13-year-old btw - fired back that he had too. He sneered that unlike me, he'd changed for the better. What a crock of shit.
I did this 13 years ago. Up and married a man in the military that I met on MySpace and moved to the next state over to be with him. Unsurprisingly that marriage only lasted 6 months but I never moved back to my home state. Haven't spoken to either of my parents in atleast 5 years, and am happily married with 4 kids. Completely cutting them out was the beginning of a complete 180 in my mental health and I regret nothing.
Hearing these stories make me optimistic for the future. Literally a few days my mother threw me out because I didn't want to clean up her vomit again. She expected me to apologize like many times before but this time I just picked up my things she tossed out and walked away. I'm sleeping in a library now cause I don't want the police to find me and force me to go back home.
I have posted this on similar videos. I was an unwanted child. My parents took everything out on me. Everything that happened in their lives that they didn't like they took out on me. I was 14 when I got my first job, just a few hours after school at a supermarket. I told them I wanted money to buy clothes and make-up. It was true I wanted to buy clothes. They did not keep me adequately clothed and my grandparents had to order them to do it. My schools over the years had also had to order them to keep me adequately clothed and had also forced them to get me spectacles after 4 years of my barely being able to read the board. The main reason for my wanting that job was that it would allow me to conceal the purchase of basic household items, a saucepan, sheets, a towel, etc., in my bedroom under my winter blanket. I had a very capacious handbag I'd bought to hold my clothes and I also had a large luggage bag. I had to wait for a day when both my mother and father were busy away from the front door. I stuffed my clothes in my handbag, grabbed the pool pre-packed luggage and was halfway to the curb before they caught me. They were very conscious of their imagined image as normal people so they didn't try to physically drag me back inside. I stayed well away from them anyway and refused to "come back inside and talk about it". They were capable of violence. I hurried down towards the main road then, having checked the lines of sight earlier, darted off into another street and up to a bus-stop on the highway. As I left I had said "you don't want to drag me back, what would the neighbours think?". At the time, I didn't know about my father's crimes but those words made him very nervous so he didn't come after me. I disappeared off the radar. I had organised to rent a flat with a girl I had barely known in high school. They didn't know her and that's why I chose her. I missed my grandparents but was seldom able to visit them as my father would just turn up to his parents' house at random trying to catch me there (they were normal, he was a monster). My other grandmother found out where I lived when I moved away from that awful flatmate and immediately gave my address to my father. I found out years later that he stalked me but he never got the chance to grab me as I never went out at night for fear he would find me. They found me again twice more after that. I kept having to move house to get away from them and them a dodgy ex boyfriend. I eventually moved to the other side of the country and gave my dodgy grandmother a PO Box address so she could send me a present. And what do you, my father starts bombarding me w ugly letters. But at least he couldn't physically find me. Life was hard for a long time after I ran away. There were two recessions to struggle through, one entirely without work and the other with very little work. But I never once regretted leaving. Being abused because your parents brought you into the world to fix their problems then took those problems out on you is entirely on them. My parents were brought up properly, my father by his normal parents, my mother by her normal father. They were just evil children. They're gone now and can't do my niece any more harm.
Our society fails when it doesn’t know how to keep children safe. These parents aren’t really parents at all but more like captors. I’m grateful to hear kids make it out, but then again so many do not.
It’s not society fails parents it’s that parents failed their kids. There are people that think and wholeheartedly believe that it would be so lovely and just so heartwarming to have a child but they physically are never going to have one because so deep down they don’t want one but they just think the idea is nice. Well when it actually happens and the woman, the girlfriend or wife gets pregnant and both are freaking out saying I don’t want this child and they don’t have enough money to get an aborted whatever, the woman ends up birthing a child and because they have no idea how to raise a child at all, the years of a child’s life are going to be hell and it’s not society’s fault, as I said it’s the parents fault because they truly did not want one but they so happened to have one. What I mean is there are People who just completely dislike children they are fine going over to a friends house where they have their kids there but having the kids come over to their house that’s the issue, there are people that hate children I never wanna be around them which is perfectly fine children are loud they’re messy blah blah blah but that’s just normal.
More of a no-contact story than a runaway one, but: My dad was a hardcore conservative fundamentalist Christian throughout my life--I lived with my parents over 1000 miles away from my dad's family, and only for that reason was I able to live a somewhat normal childhood (while my dad was politically and religiously strict, he had a rebellious streak like I did, which was why I was able to watch Harry Potter and go to normal school and what not...had I lived within proximity of his family, he would have felt more pressured to keep up appearances). My dad was always lots of fun when I was younger, but the older I got the more I found that his penchant for being entertaining didn't mean he was perfect--and I really did think of him as my 'favorite' parent until I was 13 or 14. Once I started getting into my teenage years, normal phases and behaviors on my part started clashing with my dad's worldview. I got into metal music, so he started trying to ram me with church, constantly hyper-analyzed any merch I had for satanic imagery, and did surprise checks on my laptop. I got a girlfriend, and he tried locking me *into* his apartment while he worked for the day--my mom came down on him hard for that one. I realize as I'm writing this that everything I'm saying sounds kindaaaa normal, if a bit strict and definitely conservative. But it's difficult to capture the long-building context. So, some random facts about our relationship: -I was never to argue with him. If I wanted to ask him a question, and I wasn't sure whether he'd construe it as argumentative, he'd tell me not to ask the question. There were countless instances where I'd be grounded for a week or more for a single argument. I could even google whatever we were talking about, show him that he was wrong, and that would make him even angrier. -He wanted me to be able to read his mind. Once, I was to be home by 5:30, and since I was only down the road at the park, there was no need to give myself a wide berth to get home. I strolled into his apartment at 5:30 on the dot, and he comes stomping over to the top of the stairwell going down to the front door. He had absolute rage in his eyes, and barked "Cutting a little bit close, aren't you?" It didn't matter how much I said I was on time, to him I needed to be early in order to be on time. -Most of these memories are from the period when I was 13-15, during which he simply up and quit his job--never actually told his boss he quit either...he just literally stopped going in. I guess he must have been getting money from his parents, but anyway, the result was that he grew even more depressed and bitter than he had been up until that point. He blocked out all the light in the house (mostly by nailing towels to hang above the windows), never did the dishes, never cleaned the bathroom, smoked up the house with his stinky cigars...and found new reasons to vent his anger at me. -There was a hurricane, and everybody but my grandmother lost power. While everyone else was able to spend a few days at her house, my dad felt too inferior to partake (my psychoanalysis of what happened, not what he actually said) and therefore forced me to stay with him in the darkness for multiple days. -When I spent time at my mother's house (one week on, one week off for each parent), he made me call him each night and wouldn't let me off the phone for at least an hour. This continued into my adult life, while I was trying to make new friendships and find myself--if I ever didn't call him or didn't want to talk as long as he did, he'd throw a fit and make me apologize. I might as well skip to my adult life anyway since that's where I left the last example. He eventually moved back to the state where his family lived, and I declined to join him, instead opting to remain with my mom (it was about this point I started getting fed up with his shit). He moved back in with his parents and, to my knowledge, never worked again. I visited him when I was 16 and again when I was 18. Not much to say about the first time aside from the fact that he was possessive as fuck over me the entire time I was there--couldn't spend as much time as I wanted with my cousins and other relatives, and the fact I didn't want to hang out with him 24/7 was incredibly insulting to his decaying and rotting self. When I went to visit him at age 18, I made my mind up that this was coming to an end. He spent the entire time, again, badgering me for not spending enough time with him compared to other family members--because I paid for both of these trips myself (how could he have paid? Motherfucker refused to get a job), I was kind of pissed. He brought up the argument card again, and more than once--for stupid shit, too, like I didn't want to wear the amount of layers he felt I should have worn in the winter, so he screamed at me and said that it didn't matter what age I was, I *had* to obey him at all times, end of story. I went back home, and spent the next few months planning. I wanted to do it all at once, but I didn't really become capable of ghosting shitty people until after this first self-taught lesson. I talked to him less and less. I was attempting to adult, didn't have much time, and the time I did have was better spent with friends and my mother (who is now, and will always be, my actual favorite parent). He bit back, not much at first, but more after the first couple months. Eventually he told me he was going to a mental hospital because I had abandoned him, and that I should feel responsible for that. I could make the next part longer, because there was a lot more to my response than that...but suffice to say, I told him with great satisfaction to fuck right off, blocked his number & facebook account...and that was it. This had to have been 8 or 9 years ago now. The only times I've heard from him were when he sent a long text to my best friend telling her she was destined for hell, and when he simply sent the words "degenerate homosexual" to my facebook about a year later (I used my coming-out-as-bi moment to enrage him, and it was this in tandem with the mental hospital thing that gave me the courage to cast him aside). That's it. I could go into far greater detail, but I wrote more than I meant to at the start. I only realize now, with enormous hindsight, that he was an extremely toxic, manipulative, and utterly pitiful person. Doesn't matter if they're family. If they're fucked up, throw them in the fucking trash and don't look back.
@@AkameGaKillfan777 Problem was this was all so long ago, you know? I haven't talked to the dude in like 7-8 years and most of the stories I mentioned took place 10-12 years ago
I moved out 3 months after I turned 18. It was all because my birth giver moved back in with my father and I. She would make up stuff, and would cause me to get beat. My dad, gave me a black eye for my 16th and 17th birthday. I tried running away at 15, the birth giver found me, and beat me with a belt. A teacher asked me, "what happened to your legs?" I said "oh I played football with my brother and his friends." When I moved out, I packed a bunch of my things, took it to my grandmother's house, after school, I grabbed it, and that was it. My dad asked why I did it, and I said you both are abusive. I got married at 19, had my daughter at 21, and divorced by 24. My ex husband was abusive too. I went to counseling, and it helped alot. I ended up taking the egg donor out of my life, and I have my father at arms length. He is a narcissist, and refuses to admit his faults, but he does love my daughter, and has changed some, since he met his new wife. I do have a wonderful husband, and a thriving 10 year old, also a great job. I do have some PTSD, anxiety and depression. But, I've came so far, from what I was 12 years ago. ❤
Admittedly, I kind of feel like I should have done this when I was in Jr high/high. Unfortunately, I had a liver and kidney transplant when I was an infant, and there's not much of a chance I had if I had to strike it out on my own. My parents actually care about me, set up a trust to pay for college and made sure I kept on school and everything, but they wanted something completely different out of my life than I do. Admittedly, I never really experimented to learn what I wanted to do, but I felt railroaded into doing what my parents wanted of me. I ended up bouncing in and out of community College while living with my parents and never really felt like I was making decisions for myself. I am now 27, have my first full-time job at a decent place with decent prospects, and I'm planning on FINALLY moving out. But I do kinda wished I had tried this much sooner
I wish i have a smart mother who talk wisely, a calm collected person who respect anyone. Not a bad mouth woman with tight small brain, not a person who always saw everything from the worst persfective, not a stupid uneducated woman, not a person who only in a good mood if they have money. I wish for a mother who can make me feel better when im crying, not make it worse. I wish for a mother that truly care about her Childs mental health. I wish i have soft spoken father that never yelled or raise his voice because his not obeyed enough, i wish i have a father who understand gender equality, not the kind of person that saw women lower than him, i wish for a father without anger issues, i wish for a father who wont leash his anger to anyone, i wish for a father with emotional stability. I wish i can parented myself, I wish i can fixed my life.
You’re not alone. You’re worth everything you wish for, and it sounds like you’ve had to be stronger than most. One day, you’ll be able to take care of yourself, be on your own, and deal with what is in your head. I promise it gets better. It isn’t easy, and you’ll have to struggle to feel normal (whatever that is), but you’ll be in charge of your own decisions and it will feel scary and it will be rewarding each and every time you make the best choice for yourself. I once felt like you do now and it feels now like it was another lifetime ago and happened to someone else. I was able to become my own person, face my past and accept it, and thrive. Don’t give up. Don’t let them win. Don’t let them change your heart.
Planning to do that in a few months. I'm not a teenager, and my mother isn't abusive, but we just can't live under the same roof anymore. Already got a house lined up with my SOs, and they're in a situation that would have fit better here (mentally-abusive mother, sister, and BIL). We need to cut ourselves from the constant toxic negativity permeating our family home. We had this planned for almost the ten years we've been together. Wish us luck
I tried to run away so many times but the cops kept bringing me back, no matter how much I pleaded not to or even cried I’d rather go to jail then back to that foster home
I started running away at 3 yrs old. I made it out for good at 11. My mom was a covert narcissist, who used everything to abuse me, verbal, emotional, & physical. When I was 6, she beat me with a wire clothes hanger from my neck to my ankles. So at 11 I made it out for good. I lived i the juvenile system & friends couches. Got my GED at 15 & numerous jobs. Everything I went through away from home was worth it. I met & married my best friend at 21 until he died in 2011. Since then my mom has continued to abuse me until I was 53. I finally cut her out of my life for good. Life has been so much better everytime I cut her out.
Okay... to all those who came from toxic homes and ran away, i am your family now. I am only one guy, but i am your dad now. I just want to let you know i love you, i am proud you and inknow you are going to be alright in life
Right on.if you can't be with your family from blood or adoption.find a better one.i still have mom and bro sis but my real family I feel comfortable with I found in AA.
I liked having roommates until I had a gap where I didn’t have one. Usually I found a new one by the time the other moved out but this time I didn’t and I can’t go back. COVID showed me who I am. A hermit.
The second one. I was also forbidden to get a job, move out, go to college/university and get my drivers licence at 17/18. It sucks seeing your siblings be able to do all those things. I’m still struggling with my life and I’m constantly being told how I’m such a failure and the cause of all my parents problems. I can’t make plans for the future without them all being shut down and told I’m not good enough to do anything
The story in the video made my blood boil, and so does yours. You might have to do something like what they did, and secretly make plans behind their back and escape when the time is right.
Don't tell them your plans, you don't need their permission or support. Learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all. Don't get comfortable with the chaos.
@@carbro_320 i agree on this one. 6 months of working quietly running my dropshipping business and making $2400 a month (its quite a lot in my country) and decided to save up to move out at the end of 2022. im so ready to move out.
@@powla3330 I wish you well on your journey. Not sure what country you're in but ensure you save a lot and manage credit wisely. I'm looking into drop shipping as well.
All these stories make me feel incredibly grateful that my mom is a wonderful woman. She’s tough, but never mean/abusive, and she told me one day that I’m the only person in this world she’d willingly sacrifice her life to save mine. She loves me to the moon and back and I never once considered running away
It is also very humbling because you really think that you have a tough life and circumstances and the you hear these things. You get a total new appreciation and excitement for life
I am in a situation where i barely speak or see my dad (my only living parent), he was controlling and toxic, wanting to decide every aspect of my life from clothing, diet even to my relationships, which is nuts considering i was a man in my 30's, i eventually found the strength to leave and haven't looked back since.
In my case, physical abuse never took the upperhand and only happened briefly a few times, really. But the thought of what they could do to me if they suddenly snapped, did and still terrifies me to my core. I've dealt with a a lot of emotional neglect, psychological abuse, narcissism and at the same time infantalizing behaviour and overprotectivenes. Back in 2017 I spent 6 months living in a caravan on my parents' driveway, save for showering and a minor part of my meals, just to get some distance between me and them. Then, after I had put a lot of effort in cleaning and maintaining it, my parents sold it and I was forced back. I did move rooms to be much further away from them though. Then in 2019 I was kicked out after deciding to tell them I was going to persue medical treatment for a private matter they did not agree with. After a week my mom showed up 'in support of my niece', and forced me to come back again even though I was extremely scared. When my brother's wife came in and asked if I wanted to stay with them I just cried and said "yes, but what can I do?". She didn't look me in the eye for the rest of the time I was there. Several times I was fully prepared to pick up my tent and go be homeless, and right now I'm packing my things up in order to move in with a friend of mine who is renting a house. I'm working slowly for now so I can financially benefit from the holidays a bit. I do have upcoming exams but I'll figure that out. I have a student job and work as a translator on a freelance basis but it's far from enough. I hope I can make it this time.
I’m 21 and have switched back and forth between my grandparents and my dad my whole life so idk if this is really considered “running away”. I recently left and started living with my boyfriend. The day I left, I had to call the police on my sister for attacking me and punching me after we got into a verbal altercation. My grandma lied to the police to protect my sister. My dad wasn’t even home and when he got there shortly after my boyfriend he started yelling at me for calling the cops on family. I told him I deserve to live in a place I don’t have to worry about when the next time I’m going to get punched is going to be. He didn’t have any argument against that but followed me outside and started saying I’m emotionally manipulative (specifically because after multiple conversations with my grandma about my BFF since FIRST GRADE staying at her house with us because their parents were abusing them my grandma agreed because she loves me, because to my dad emotional honesty is manipulation). When I got in the car, he yanked my door open to continue yelling at me then threatened to call the cops on me when I pushed him away from the door. Lots of yelling ensued, dad almost went after my boyfriend for honking the car to try and get us to stop yelling (good thing dad didn’t cause I was ready to defend my boyfriend). I was finally able to get the door closed and left with just the few things I packed. I have gone back to get more of my stuff multiple times. I just talked to my sister for the first time since it happened and while I didn’t get any sort of apology she did give me candy and homemade pumpkin bread. She’s my twin, I’m always going to have a place for her in my heart. I haven’t seen my dad and I don’t really want to. But at least he’s not living with grandma anymore. The man slut got a new girlfriend and already moved in with her. Let’s see how long it takes for him to get tired of her. Thanksgiving should be…interesting.
I’d also just like to say that a few months before this my family literally ruined my birthday for me over a game of among us. My family just doesn’t really care about me. And so so so many things have happened my whole life, I also cut off my half sister for her reaction to my sister abusing me. Luckily she’s apparently not going to be at thanksgiving, if I’m lucky she’ll skip Christmas too.
It started when my mom asked me to fix the leak in the shower. When she turned the water off, my sperm donor verbally abused her. I overheard it all and told him to stop being such a dick. He defended his actions saying things like "You'll understand when you're married" and "Why should I take marriage advice from my unmarried son?" My mom and I left for the day to clear out heads. My sperm donor texted her saying "If you call the police on me, you'll regret it." A family friend who happens to be a cop told us we were in danger and to not return to the sperm donor. 18 months and a bitter divorce later, my mom and I share an apartment together, I do not regret anything.
Jesus. After reading all of the comments here and on the video, I am more grateful that I grew up in an environment with loving parents, brother, and family. Hearing what people have gone through breaks my heart.
I had a great childhood but went off the rails starting at 15. Been 35 years of hell ever since. I just cling to my childhood memories now since I'm too old and disabled to really have a good life.
I didn't finish the video, it's rather depressing, but I was expecting more stories of parents leaving their SO and children behind. I guess these people don't particularly care to share their stories...
They do. You're looking for parents who left their families or fathers who walked out stories. In those threads you also get stories from both sides the left and who left. These stores are more along the line of children running away
My mom hauled âss when she was 17. She loved her family and still does, they all have great contact, she just says that the "good old days" were crazy and so was her family. Her parents weren't understanding and any negative emotion was seen as "these damn kids are so sensitive" to them. This was how parenting was at the time, so she doesn't hold it against them. I love my grandparents, they're great people, but definitely flawed. They were good but crazy, and she had to get out of there.
My husband left his parents after they had a huge meltdown over us moving to another country (a decision we hadn't made or talked about at the time but something we later did because of their behaviour). They refused to have a relationship with our daughter as a result and tried to convince him to divorce me and take custody of our child (she was 10 weeks old at the time) so they could have access to her. They kept thousands of dollars of our stuff, used to show up at our house and "borrow" stuff all the time (they had a key and would let themselves in to borrow stuff) and expected us to look after them. We haven't spoken to them in 6 years and don't look back.
Got kicked out at 16 9 months pregnant had my son 1 week latter, graduated school went to college quit college had to work had to take care of my kid,went back to college I learnt how to be a adult at 16 but I'm glad cuz since I was 12 I had to take care of myself.I been in the same relationship since I was 16 we now have 5 wonderful boys both work good jobs have our own place we are about to buy a house soon.so yah although life sucks a lot es.since my mental health working hard paid off.
My best friend is a few years younger than me and he lives with a very abusive family. He says if it weren't for me, he would have offed himself a long time ago. I'm always there for him and when he moves out, I'm going to help him get out of there.
Why do people abuse things? A kid is supposed to be the one you have unconditional love for are supposed to bring happiness and meaning to your life, but if you're just gonna beat/starve/sexually abuse/abandon the kid, why get one, especially through adoption?
It’s your good fortune to not understand this. Short answer: Abuse needs a target. More detail: Adoptive parents often think relationships will make them feel complete, so the parent/child power imbalance Is an appealing sort of relationship. Kids with the abandonment wound are pretty easy to please (and bring the bonus of conferring the mask of sainthood), and are subsidized through the foster care system. It’s more often than not exploitative narcissism, which is the (unaware) very antithesis of nurturant parenting. They love what they have a use for, much like politicians regarding constituents (too arrogant to realize their “love“ is a depravity inflicted for their own benefit). The politician analogy might seem a little odd but I chose it because the desire to govern others is definitively indicative of not having as much concern for the interests of the governed as for one’s own (plus elections are sorta pageant-like popularity contests in which the contenders say whatever wins much like parents who want kids too badly to realize someone who thinks a relationship will make them complete cannot be completed by anything until they grow the fuck up and complete themselves)
I was 19 or so at the time and preparing for my SAT in the US (I was homeschooled so normal semesters didn't apply here). My toxic narcissistic mother wouldn't stop being verbally and emotionally abusive to the point where I couldn't even focus or study, so I said "fuck the SAT" and booked a ticket to London, where I lived as a child, with only $500 to my name. Just took my shit and left. No clue what I was gonna do. I lived in a hostel for a few weeks before contacting my father in Spain who I had never known. He wasn't all that bad. Lived in Spain with him for a few months, then my grandmother on my father's side wires $15000 as a gift to my account and I am able to promptly move to London proper. It was hard at first but it was worth it. My mother has been effectively cut off from my life since then. I regret nothing.
I left right after turning 18. I waited until I was legal so that no one could send me back. I moved to the opposite side of the planet, without knowing anyone, or the language, or having a job lined up. Life was hard for the first years, ngl. I survived by teaching English. Now I own my house, have a full-time job, two kids, and a happy life. I regret nothing.
There is actually a youtube channel by an abusive mother telling her side of the story (playing victim) after her daughter went no-contact. Even with only telling her side of the story, being able to freely lie and twist as she wants, the 10 videos she has shaken me to my core. She is pretty open about how crazy people's advice is of respecting her child as an adult human being and sees no point in repairing the relationship if she didn't plan on becoming her chew toy again. She is whining about this crazy mental illness her child is suffering from that makes her believe she can have opinions and stuff. Worst thing? She is a smart, successful person. She just can't wrap her head around the idea that her child is not property. And she sees no point in treating her child as something else, as her property. And she makes a mockery of the last letter her daughter wrote her, but still reads the whole thing.
I never permanently ran from home, but I would often sneak out to stay at friend's houses while my mom was in a bad mood. I always had a runaway bag packed (Food, water, extra money, notebooks, etc). They all knew how my mom was, and their parents let me stay over at their houses until my dad would pick me up to take me to my nana's house (He often left the house with my brothers to go to my grandma's while my mom was freaking out) I live with my nana now and life is a lot better now that I'm not required to spend time with her, but there were a lot of times where I really considered grabbing a bus and leaving for good.
I didn't run away but was kicked out. My parents only really started to get physically abusive whenever we got older. Years of poverty and living in a motel room with maybe one meal a day and tattered, second-hand clothing. October 6th, 2019, i was 18 and feesh outbof highschool trying to get a job ans improve my life. My mothee attacked my brother after he rose his arms in a defensive motion as she was in his face and screaming, being belligerent and throwing things. She made him late for the bus over this and i eventually couldn't take watching it any longer. I snapped and forced myself between them and held her so my brother could grab his stuff and run. I didn't hurt her, only kept her from moving and onlu after he was too far to be chased i let her go. She took my key and forced me to leave without my stuff. Thankfully my mom had to work and my dad was willing to let me in to pack up. Despite being fall, the heat was blistering, i spent all day lugging a small wagon with my stuff in 5 miles away to my grandmother who took me in. My best friend got me a cheap smartphone and a month of service so i could get a job. My grandma barely had enough income between her social security and EBT to feed herself, let alone 3 people (my brother came with me). We barely made it the next few months, always hungry because we had to ration food. I met my now fiancé around this time, both her and her family made Thanksgiving possible that year and i still thank them for that. Decembee 9th was my first day at my first job and from there I only got better, both emotionally and financially. Since then, my fiancé and i closed the distance, we now live together with her family and couldn't be happier. I'm working on starting a career in Real Estate to hopefully grow my wealth and make better choices than my parents. If you take anything from this, know that you're not powerless and you CAN be happy. It won't alway be easy, but you can come out of the other side in one piece.
I was locked out the house after the woman that adopted me and I had an arguement. Shechad always been over protective to an extreme. I was never allowed anywhere without her, wasn't allowed to have friends, she even refused to give me a key to the house. Joke was on her. I had graduated from nursing school, passed my state board exam, and was helped by a classmate to find a place of my own after I got a job. The only time I went back was when she died in a house fire. I felt bad about it but frankly I felt worse about the dog dying than her. After the shock and grief came a sense of relief. I was finally free.
My great aunt had three kids and kicked them all out in this order of age 16 kicked out 15 kicked out 14 kicked out. Now all of her kids are horrible and she's losing her legs and being put into a home
I feel so bad for some of you kids. You are all good enough and deserve love. I love you all, gay, cis, white, black, asian and any other group,colors or sexuality. Learn to respect yourself and your boundaries. ❤️
I didn't go NC with my family until I was 33 but looking back, I should've done it much sooner. I was out of the house several years by then, but I delayed moving out because of my younger brother and sister- I thought I was protecting them from the abuse. Probably no surprise to anyone that as adults, they were more loyal to and acted like my abusive mom- if I would've let them, they would've drained me of all my money, just for one abusive example. I should've saved myself and gotten out as soon as I could instead of waiting until my mid 20s. Better late than never, though, and life is so much better now without any of them in it. They blame my husband, of course, because he's so controlling lol. If they knew me half as well as they thought they did, they'd know and remember that I'm pretty damned strong-willed- one reason we clashed so much before I cut them all off. Hubby is awesome and my family is now my chosen family. Only regret is waiting too long to go NC.
I've never ran away but I'm seriously considering it. I hate everything in my life. My brother is so immature , rude (ex. He said Shrek could draw way better than me, your stupid etc.) And he says its my job not to argue back because he has autism My mom takes her anger out on me and my siblings and even encouraged us to run away. My dad is really mean and he forces us to clean all the time. Basically I only have two supporters my best friend and my sister...I just don't know what to do..running away won't solve me hating myself but it would solve my home problems I hate myself because I'm so stupid... I literally blamed my brother for something I did..
Don't think of yourself as stupid because it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. Think more highly of yourself and your efforts and that can help. Try avoiding your toxic family as much as safely possible. Maybe get a job to save up if you're old enough but I hope you can trust your parents if they have access to your bank account. If you can make one without them then great. Work on those things you feel you aren't smart about. Maybe you blamed your brother for something because he usually does things to mess you you so you assumed it was him without thinking or making sure. Maybe try only acting when you are sure. Would you like to share your drawings with me on discord?
If my mom keeps yelling, if she keeps using porfiera as her get-out-of-jail free card, if she continues to verbally abuse me, I'm taking advice from this video, and I'm running off to th bus stop in my trailer park. And then I'm calling my dad, where I'll tell him "Dad, I don't wanna live with mom anymore. I wanna live with you. I'm at the bus stop." And then, in a perfect world, I'd be living with him and my step mom, and my step brother would be there, playing video games with me. And I'd never see my mom for a year, and then I'd finally be ready to look at this sick woman's face.
Don't avoid longer higher educations "just because". But make sure you do a through evaluation of the future prispects if work in that field, that the actual jobs there interest and motivate you, and that you have a realistic plan B for financing. Taking educational routes that generate formal qualifications along the way, not just after a 5-7+ year stint, can also be a good idea. Sticking it out 1-2 rough year(s) is a lot more realistic than 4-5.
I actually never ran away.. but I was going to try to move out anyways. I was never going to say anything; but I had to move back in with my family to get out of an abusive relationship, where I heard my dad say once my youngest brother moved out that they were going to get a foster kid. I told my mother what happened to me as a kid and she threw me out of the house; threw all my shit into garbage bags and texted me that night saying they were getting a lawyer. My heart broke; I’ve never been a huge cop fan, but they put me up in a hotel that night so I wouldn’t have to sleep in my friend’s car I was using. (That friend didn’t want me to stay at their house in case my dad went crazy, along with everyone who knew and pushed me to tell her. Everyone told me she’d believe me and then turned a blind eye, letting me live in a shelter and just try to figure it out as a struggling, underdeveloped 20 year old.) Ended up moving in with someone who kinda helped me get back on my feet before they kicked me out too, on the TUESDAY of thanksgiving week, my stuff had to be out by Saturday. I really started to believe it was my fault, but my now boyfriend swooped me up and just really helped me see how shitty people can be. He’s helping build my confidence back up and I love him so much for being so patient with me, I’ve never had anyone do this. Going on a year now and still going strong ❤️ still haven’t talked to my parents. Things are going pretty well though, I have a steady job (for a 21 year old), and yeah I put school on hold, but I’m living with someone now who loves me and cares about me and wants me around which has been working on my confidence. I’m still transitioning into a healthier person, and it’s a rocky road, but I look at who I was and who I am now and I see improvement, it just took awhile to really get past the stuck on areas, and I’m not done yet, but I’m getting there. The last thing I sent my mother was about how this isn’t how normal mothers react and the damage she was doing to me; where she proceeded to scream at me that I must be lying because I never said anything when I was younger, (completely not true, at 11 I carved whore into my wrist even though I’d never had consensual sex at my age, sorry I didn’t realize that wasn’t a good enough sign of being abused), and I was nuts, and being mean to her. I forgot being mean to her was saying “hey you’re hurting my feelings because you’re supposed to be my mom and this is all fucked up,” and is a personal attack on her because she couldn’t take responsibility even if it would save her fucking life. Parents fucking suck, but I saw this comment on a Reddit thread once that I love and try to live by; “just because you were destined to fail doesn’t mean you did.” If you’re hurting, get out; it’s not going to be easy, but you will be so much happier in the long run, I guarantee you. You have to get past the fears and brainwashing deeply entrained in your mind. Sometimes I still cry about my parents because I miss my brothers, but at the end of the day, I finally did what was right for me.
Just wanted to add one last thing; the thing I’ve been struggling with recently- it’s just crazy to me how we haven’t talked in almost 8 months, and she doesn’t even care to make sure I’m not fucking dead. Mother of the year bro, mother of the year..
Ran away from home today. My mother destroyed the door I locked to hide behind while begging her to stop yelling at me. Not sure how this is going to work out. But she's trying to make it sound like I'm delusional and this isn't abuse because it's her right to hurt me. I just can't continue living like this.... but I might have to go back again. Back to more abuse.
Hello there, I saw your comment today and I really hope that you've made it... And even if not, please know that I'm cheering for you... All the best...
Honestly ive been really wanting to run away but im only fourteen. My parents(especially my mom) are very abusive, mentally and physically, and will lash out over the smallest things. They even make fun of me ever since i told them i was r@p3d at nine years old by my dads friend who was babysitting me. They love to trigger my ptsd by grabbing at my waist or my neck. Theyre also very abusive towards each other and im waiting so badly until i have either proof of them doing the shit they do or they kick me out(theyve threatened to so many times over the years) I spend most days locked in my bedroom and eating one meal a day because they think thats the way to raise a child. My mom at one point used to feed me dog food and cigarette butts when i was ten. Worst part is, i never thought anything was wrong about it until my friends found out by coming over one day randomly
@@quin_tessenc3 can you do anything to get evidence? Like borrowing a phone from a friend if you don't have your own and keeping the voice memo running in your pocket? Taking pictures of bruises? Then if you go to a teacher you trust, when they contact Social Services (teachers are mandatory reporters) you'll be able to properly explain why they should take you away from that house. My heart goes out to you.
Haven’t yet but I’ve been having thoughts of running away.. not because of family issues but because there’s too many bad memories of the horrible person I used to be attached to this environment. I have a saving plan but for it to work it’ll take a whole year.
gotta do what's best for you, but if you like your family make sure you don't burn your bridges. Stay in touch, show you care and didn't feel that they were the problem
A year will go by fast if you make a smaller schedule of plans. Trust me I've been living a hell life for 35 years and have many regrets. One year and you'll be free. Good luck.
My parents (mostly my dad) and i had a lot of really bad fights, and i would usually run away weeks at a time. After constant physical fights they decided to make me leave the country and send me to Mexico (where we are from). I was born in mexico and at 8months old I was brought to the US up the time I was 17 y/o. I decided to go ahead and leave just to get away. I left completely alone the summer before senior year of high school. It was incredibly hard but it was the best they could have ever done for me. Im now 24, I havnt seen my parents since, and dont plan on going back home
I went no contact with my entire family after realizing just how abusive, racist and hateful they really were. My mother frequently abused me as a child, and the rest of the family took her side with the same reaction: she’s still your mom. No. Moms don’t threaten to have you arrested over a verbal argument then choose your abusive stepdad over you. As if that wasn’t bad enough, no one in my family knows the meaning of “no means no”. I can’t tell you how often I’ve been grabbed, slapped, verbally accosted and made the villain simply for asking that they not touch me (I’m autistic and I have nerve damage. Being touched physically hurts me at times) On top of all of this: my grandmother frequently called black folks the n word and would scream “I’m not your n-word!”, simply for asking for a bottle of water if she was already going to the kitchen. It’s been one year since I left and I only regret not leaving sooner. I’m finally at peace. To anyone living with an abusive family, just know there is a way out, and it’s worth taking the risk if you can afford to do so. You’re not alone, even if, like me, you feel like you are.
I left my family house legally. I was 18. Grew up in a money orientated household, abusive and driven into a depressed by another family member to the point I was on the brink of suicide. Moved out and totally cut them out. Haven't spoke to them for 11 years, not once. I have 4 kids and a wife and they don't know any of it. I only speak to 2 family members and they're not in contact with them. It's awesome! No regrets. Living comfortably, depression free and in a loving household.
11:51 The part where it said( it took several years for my mother and i to speak again but we do so and it only works if we don’t bring up the past ) that’s not how you should do it, The past is not going to heal or ever go away or even begin to ever go away if you don’t confront your mother on why she did those things to you and confront your abusive brother on why he did those things to you. So you’re just gonna do it just like how my father did it to my mother then, he wasn’t physically abusive but he was immensely and I mean horribly immensely mental abusive and emotional abusive to my mother and us and I mean us kids. If I were you, The only way I would ever even think about talking to her is if you and her agreed to meet and talk and she explained why she did the things that she did to you and after she explained you got up and left and told her to not contact me I will contact you and tell you if I’m ready to make a relationship again with you. People like your mother who can pretend the past did not happen and when you bring it up she gets upset or whatever, that is you bringing up stuff that she did to you and her only excuse is to get angry at you, if she does that, then she has not matured at all and she is only put on a façade. I really do hope that you your mother and both of your brothers can have a normal family again but you’re just not handling it the correct way, leaving when you did yes that was the correct thing to do don’t get me wrong that was but the way you handled it, when you spoke to your mother and you believed that she had changed, your mother is still the same but to meet you she put on a fake face, but you just can’t see past it. I really hope the rest of your life is filled with happiness and adventures.
I was thinking the exact same thing. If it cant be talked about or acknowledged, then the mother shouldnt be forgiven. She isnt being sorry, she is just wanting to forget so she doesnt have to put any effort to truly being a better person.
Current parent of 6 kids. Aged 20, 18, 17, 14, 12, 9 I am the son of an abusive hateful Karen who also came from abuse. Fuck abusive parents. The sooner you evict them from your life, the healthier you will be. You can break the cycle, just love your kids, respect their rights, respect their privacy, respect their property, don’t forget what it was like to grow up with oppression. Abusers try to twist the phrase “forgive and forget” to mean they can do whatever they want and get away with it. But that is a perversion of the truth, and a perversion of Christianity if that’s how you roll. If anybody, thinks that Jesus or any other God intended for abusers to be able to get away with whatever they want and then be able to guilt you into coming back for more abuse by them saying “forgive and forget” then I’m happy to tell you that is not what any healthy person, or God wants for you. Forgive and forget is for your own mental health, not for the abuser. For your own health you have to get zen and forgive them because they don’t deserve any space in your head where you think about how much you hate them, that only hurts you and detracts from your happiness. Then the “forget” part means you cut them out of your life. You forget that they ever existed as best as you can. If you believe “terrible two’s “ are a thing, you’ll make it come true. If you believe “teenagers” are awful arrogant assbastards, then you’ll make it come true. Forget those cunty labels! It’s consigning your children and you to misery before they even have a chance, and it’s a hateful thing to do to the poor people. Remember that your job is to start with an entirely dependent newborn baby, and then in 18 short years, teach them as much as you can so that they are independent and can function in the world and not be crushed by reality when it inevitably comes rolling along like a steamroller freight train.
Then learning to be independent can be hard. Them learning to analyze things on their own can be hard to watch. Watching them ignore your advice but letting them do it, and not running over their freedom with your experience can be hard. But if you’ve given them your input and they want to go with a different choice, then their experience will be a very good teacher also. Although sometimes you get surprised and find out that they did actually have a better idea that worked better than your experience. Then everyone wins.
My dad abused me pretty badly ran away when I was seven…. I constantly look back wondering if I did the right thing. Ngl getting kinda misty eyed just writing this lol.
I moved out once when i was 17,but had to go back for my mother had passed out when she found out i left. Im 21 now and i eant to eventually leave again,my towm is a hole,sometimes i walk 20,30 km,but the image of my mother passing out again haunts me,im a prisioner of that past and cant move on,but i want to.
These stories make me so SO happy that my parents support my dream career and try to help me on planning my future they are amazing parents indeed I'm sorry for the hardships you had to indour
So sometimes when I get into really bad argument with my parents after I get hit or something I would get my iPad and go outside into the backyard for either 30 minutes to an hour then I'll come in once I got my stuff together
I'm So happy for that first person! where ever they are, i wish them All the luck and talent in the world! I dont usually get quite that mushy to random r/ videos, but fuq it im drunk and vulnerable and no one deserves that level of disrespect, especially from the only reason you exist in the first place. You live your best life random, but just a valid, guy you! Be well!
You know I'm wondering about something (for U.S. Citizens). If you were to run away.. sure you can do it, but what about stuff like the birth certificate and social security..? The parents still have it and how is one going to replace that and make sure that the parents won't do anything shady with the info they already have?
Man, I cant believe sometimes that my story actually had a good ending, my parents were abusive but completely turned around and changed. I still don't trust them, and sometimes I worry they only did it so I would feel guilty if I ever wanted to leave them, but life is actually normal now and I'm not considering suicide any more (because if I needed to run I'd have nowhere to go, not to mention I suffer from hardcore depression and anxiety and don't have anyone else in the entire world. Running away would most likely end up in me being... tortured or killed by people)
Ok for context I’m adopted to two beautiful women they adopted my sister before me so naturally they thought adopting me would only be the right thing to do. But even so. One of my mothers was really manipulative, narcissistic, and emotionally/mentally abusive. She has always threatened to hit me and my sister whenever things didn’t go her way. Not always going through with it but she made it so like she was. I also found out she was a very codependent, narcissistic mother with a victim complex. Anyway by the age of 14 I’m depressed and rlly contemplating ending it the abuse was so bad that my other mum we’ll call her mum.R took me away to live with my sister(her daughter not my sister she got kicked out from both homes lol but that’s another story that not mine to tell). Mum.R and her side of the family really helped me with my undiagnosed mental issues. They helped me get rid of the habits I used to conform to my mother. To clarify mum.R and mother split when I was around 4 I think but mother she was like this to mum.R, my sister, and now me unfortunately. I do have a somewhat good relationship with mother but was pretty good nit too long ago but she got to comfortable and didn’t respect my boundaries in doing so she acted out and kicked me out. Out of impulse but she then realised that, that was her last chance to ever have a good standing relationship with me. Now I just really tolerate her whenever I see her(me see her is because my sister sister has a kid now so we go over to let her see the kid) but I’m in a good place now, but I also want my mother to bee in a good place but she doesn’t want to change so I’ll just let her suffer which will only because she didn’t want to better herself nor change which is ok for me since it’s not my problem ;d
Eloped at 15 with my boyfriend he was 19. We got engaged one weekend and left the following weekend. We got married at 16 & 19 never has any relationship with our parents after that.
I left my home state at 30. I’m just getting my mental health under control at 32. My family life was long over or at least time is required before we can really rebuild again. I won’t ever live in my home state unless it’s to visit my parents, mom at the cemetery and dad is still alive. I feel so awkward around my family overall. Bpd and dissociation isn’t safe to try and see them right now. Newly diagnosed. Things are feeling better emotionally.
I always wonder how many of these cases have the "victim" actually being the bad guy, spinning the story to us to make the other party look bad, while in reality, they're borderline, narcissistic or lack the ability to self criticize.
I could see my sister talking about my mom being “abusive” and her cutting her off. She’s not abusive, she just wouldn’t pay for my sisters shit anymore (who’s 28 years old). My sister has BPD. As soon as she couldn’t get money from my mom she refused to talk to her.
Oh, yes. Like these kids who say they were kidnapped at 2am and sent to a brat camp. Parents don't do that stuff for fun, if only because those camps cost $$$. "Well, I was going through difficult phase..." yea, you were probably terrorising the neighbourhood until 1am.
Yeah I’m willing to bet that at least a handful of these “kids” were doing stuff that didn’t help the situation. But of course we only hear their version of events. The truth is, people won’t make themselves look bad if they can help it.
@@joshduthie3401 that's not actually true. I've heard of perfectly fine kids being sent off because their parents didn't really want them around or felt it wasn't perfect enough and these camps ruin or kill them. Not hearing from their kids for months isn't normal.
I don't think I could ever forgive my oldest sister for the things she did to me when I was younger. We haven't spoken in 10 years but I'm scared of what would happen. What I would do to someone.
25:14 I feel the same about the name thing. Every time I hear my first name or the nickname my family gave me, it feels like I'm still connected to them somehow when thats the very last thing I'd ever want to be. Very much considering changing my name.
More people simply need to just go no contact with their parents or other “loved ones...” I’m not saying it’s easy but damn can it be preferable to the alternative. You just have to get to the point where you realize that these people are just going to make your life worse. Period. End of story...
So, I am thinking of running away and I want to start fresh. My father is Mentally and Physically abusive. He lashes out on me for fun and uses a metal bar and beats my bare behind, again just for fun. He holds me back from the sport I love (Football) and he wants me to pursue his dreams of becoming a state champ in Wrestling. I've never told anyone this, but he also abuses my brother. My mom would be traumatized if me and him both left. She lashes out on me too, but not as badly. I need more tips to run away intelligently. I've been saving money, but my Father Takes it and says, "It's for you to live with me," I'm 13 and I live in the State of WV, can anyone help?
The fact that everyone says it's the best thing they've ever done. It's Confusing, because everyone says it's a bad thing, also that you're a bad person if you do. My dad has laughed at me for even running away. I have once and I was grounded and beaten for exactly 76 days. I threaten to stay with my mom, but nobody ever files for a court date. He makes fun of me for it... and it's just making everything worse
Massachusetts runaway use the trains for running away I do not know if you have to be older than 13 cause that’s our age limit but ya. Hope things better . Me and my friend are running away this summer
i just left my house. my cat is gonna have to stay at my brothers and i’m staying with my ex. like literally earlier today. working on finding a place off my own, and should probably look for a better paying job, but i don’t have a license yet. been crying all day. i hope to move to oregon and start a good life, but for now i’m confused and angry in utah. :/
Wow really proud of some of these people. I always wanted to run away and start over but instead I ended up hooking up with narcissists who would rule my life until I could finally get away. Only 1 1/2 years of my life have been truly free. I'm stuck in another situation I can't get out of since I'm disabled now I'm never going to have a good life.
@@beautifulflower327 I had cardiomyopathy back in 2005 due to all the stress my ex narcissist husband put me through. I have a damaged heart doctors told me I wouldn't make it 10 years but's been 17 now. Any day I could keel over but I try and eat better lost 50 pounds last year so I can stay around for my son. Just don't have the resources to start over and being sick no one will hire me.
Everyone don't get married lol. I failed at marriage multiple times but I was married to narcissists. Worst decisions ever. If you have the means to get out go do it. Even a few years of peace will be worth it.
Oh definately don't trust counselors. Had a run-in with my daughter's counselor in high school. Counselor was bat-shit crazy. I don't know what world she grew up in but in my world, you're there and paid to HELP kids. She did absolutely nothing but cause angst. Btw, daughter is very successful young woman who makes games and develops them for the world. Proud mom here.
I had to go no contact with my mom after I got married and she started constantly fighting with my wife. Best decision I ever made. Realized how manipulative and abusive she was my whole life. If someone is in the same situation, leave and dont look back. If someone offers no positivity to your life, they don't need to be a part of it.
Indeed!
That's wrong man. That's your mother and you need to respect her no matter what! She carried you for nine months and fed and clothed you and probably gave you shit you didn't need. You're an ungrateful person and you choose some woman over your own flesh and blood? You're THAT whipped? Sad. This is why I hate millennials y'all think the world owes you shit . Wtf poor mother.
@@K-9-DFW it really depends. Of course run if youve got a drugged adict mum or abusive mum and crap. Manipulative to me doesnt do as much damage as the drugs addict, neglecting, heck some parents torture their own kids.
@@skullcrusher5424 I was actually just bullshitting she did the right thing
@@K-9-DFW Idk. My biological mom(I was adopted by my step mom) would use manipulation constantly. I never noticed until she showed up at my house one day and she shoved my wife down in a low key argument. I told her to leave because violence in not cool and my kids where there also. She wouldn't apologize so I told her I'm done. Years later and here I am, life is so much better with less drama because she's gone. Looking back I realized she siphoned my money(mom was over my banking)because I would go on deployments and come back broke. The first deployment after that I came home to thousands my wife saved up for my return. Sometimes if a person is toxic you just have to cut them out. Blood or not.
Still remember the day lol. Literally ran out the door with a backpack on, told my mother I was leaving- she laughed and then I bolted. She ran after me, I got into a car with a friend and we sped away.
At one point I had dropped my phone and had to pick it up and see her face as she was catching up. A lot of phone calls afterwards from everyone who knew me.
Seriously so dramatic all the way around. Never went back though, it's been over 5 years.
Glad you ran away from that bitch, stay strong!
I don't even know what you or your mom look like, but picturing a woman running and almost catching up to you after you dropped your phone...seems pretty terrifying 😳
@@natiliee.s.5476 frr, im just imagine my mom chasing me like some sort of granny horror flick lmao
@@bobross516
🤣🤣🤣
Like the freaking shape shifting Terminator cop 🥶🥶🥶😅
Google raised me mostly, had to learn how to do a lot of things when i went out on my own at 19
Hail the internet
it was the internet that taught me self defense nearly died once so pog for the internet
Unironically that's how most people end up learning, especially people raised by boomers who rather yell at you for not knowing how to do stuff you were never taught
@@merlink.7287 yep would get yelled at for the littlest things so i would just try to figure things out myself then when the internet became a thing, it became my new parent lol
@@gerku670 it has all the answers!
To those who had to leave home for your own safety and mental health, I hope you're all doing well and are better off. You can't pick your bio family, but you get to pick your friends/new family.
You know what's keeping me home?
*Fear.*
The fear of my mother forcing me home, not realizing that I wasn't depressed during the summer, and it was because I was with dad. She hasn't had the brutal realization that I'm depressed because of her. I don't respect this crazy, sick, twisted woman, I FEAR this woman.
I'd love to go into details about her, but then we'd be here for a year.
The problem is nowadays growing up, you can't really decide who you get to hang out with or be around which is really frustrating
It took me nearly a decade to get where I am now, but I ran away from an abusive home the day after I graduated high school. I just finished nursing school this summer and am about to start my career in my dream specialty in January.
Leaving home that young was one of the scariest things I ever had to do, but it was a decision I'll never regret. I sincerely believe that I would've been dead within the year had I stayed.
@@juliefarrell6688 I hope you are able to overcome your fear and live a full, happy life.
I ran away once but the police got me and now no one is willing to do it with me and I'm scared I will be kidnapped or something like that since I'm pretty stupid. If I was braver and smarter than I would leave this fucking place.
I don't get how can people adopt children when you're just going to be abusive to them...
Great acting and a good suit...
@@seand.g423 money?
@@boxeswithfoxes well, that too...
Evil less human people
Mr krabs : hello I like money
I had taken in a fifteen year old runaway boy. He was a friend of my nephew and had been living on the streets. I went through children and youth so he could stay with me for awhile. He told me when he was 9 his younger sister was hit by a car and killed. His mother abused him and said to him why couldn't you have died instead. She was supposed to be a Christian and had been emotionally damaged. As to why I a single male would go through the trouble of taking in a strange teenage legally. Well when I was a teenager a friend of mine was abused by his father and ran away from home. He lived on the streets for a year. When he turned sixteen he drowned in a swimming accident. He never got to live a full life. My nephews friend wasn't going to die on the streets not if I could help it!
You're a very kind person. The world needs more people like you
dam.
You have a beautiful soul. Just in case anyone hasn't said so.
It's very interesting the first time you stand up for yourself to an abusive parent. My mom never hit me, but she was really verbally and emotionally abusive. She made my sister have panic attacks. One day when I turned 18-19, while she was screaming at us, I had enough and just stood up and shouted for her to fucking stop. The look on her face was genuine shock. Because I was not only taller than her now, but I could also scream louder than her. There were a few rough years as I was figuring out what to do next, but we've since sat down and had several conversations about the messed up things that happened during my childhood. She's admitted wholeheartedly that she made a lot of mistakes as a parent and I've forgiven her. I know not everyone has a story that ends this nicely, but I hope any of you who are going through abuse learn to stand up for yourself or manage to get away. Stay strong.
That's nice that your mom was able to admit to her wrongdoings and that things are seemingly better between you guys.
Be careful. My mother 'admitted 'to me that she messed up, but her actions didn't change and became worse than ever so I ghosted her anyway. She might just be trying to con you into keeping her around.
@@ashraile That's too bad that things didn't improve with you and your mother, but I'm glad you were able to get away from her all the same. If they're not going to change for the better, then yeah, have nothing to do with them.
@@ashraile This was years ago now and we've had a great relationship since. Sorry that happened-- sometimes parents will use admission to just manipulate you more.
I remember the first time I started defending myself against my violently abusive mother, I shoved her away from me and she was so shocked it was actually funny.
Ah, when you try to stand up for yourself and the abusive parent whines how you've 'changed'. No shit I've changed, dad, I realised I was worth more than being your plaything.
you rock girl!
@@ashraile Thank you! Realising your worth can be difficult and can take a long time, but it's so worth it.
My favorite is "you were a nice person, you never used to be like this". You mean I'm no longer your doormat?
@@aerialace3084 Oof. Been there. My sperm donor told me during an argument that I'd changed. I - a fucking 13-year-old btw - fired back that he had too. He sneered that unlike me, he'd changed for the better. What a crock of shit.
@@aerialace3084 No, I've always had these feelings deep down, they've just been bottled up over the years.
That's going to be my response someday.
I did this 13 years ago. Up and married a man in the military that I met on MySpace and moved to the next state over to be with him. Unsurprisingly that marriage only lasted 6 months but I never moved back to my home state. Haven't spoken to either of my parents in atleast 5 years, and am happily married with 4 kids. Completely cutting them out was the beginning of a complete 180 in my mental health and I regret nothing.
Hearing these stories make me optimistic for the future. Literally a few days my mother threw me out because I didn't want to clean up her vomit again. She expected me to apologize like many times before but this time I just picked up my things she tossed out and walked away. I'm sleeping in a library now cause I don't want the police to find me and force me to go back home.
Tell us how it goes, okay?
@@returnoftheromans6726 he hasn’t responded..
@@rizahki
That's a little concerning. 😕
U good bro?
@@returnoftheromans6726 ik man..
I have posted this on similar videos.
I was an unwanted child. My parents took everything out on me. Everything that happened in their lives that they didn't like they took out on me. I was 14 when I got my first job, just a few hours after school at a supermarket. I told them I wanted money to buy clothes and make-up. It was true I wanted to buy clothes. They did not keep me adequately clothed and my grandparents had to order them to do it. My schools over the years had also had to order them to keep me adequately clothed and had also forced them to get me spectacles after 4 years of my barely being able to read the board.
The main reason for my wanting that job was that it would allow me to conceal the purchase of basic household items, a saucepan, sheets, a towel, etc., in my bedroom under my winter blanket.
I had a very capacious handbag I'd bought to hold my clothes and I also had a large luggage bag. I had to wait for a day when both my mother and father were busy away from the front door. I stuffed my clothes in my handbag, grabbed the pool pre-packed luggage and was halfway to the curb before they caught me.
They were very conscious of their imagined image as normal people so they didn't try to physically drag me back inside. I stayed well away from them anyway and refused to "come back inside and talk about it". They were capable of violence. I hurried down towards the main road then, having checked the lines of sight earlier, darted off into another street and up to a bus-stop on the highway.
As I left I had said "you don't want to drag me back, what would the neighbours think?". At the time, I didn't know about my father's crimes but those words made him very nervous so he didn't come after me.
I disappeared off the radar. I had organised to rent a flat with a girl I had barely known in high school. They didn't know her and that's why I chose her.
I missed my grandparents but was seldom able to visit them as my father would just turn up to his parents' house at random trying to catch me there (they were normal, he was a monster). My other grandmother found out where I lived when I moved away from that awful flatmate and immediately gave my address to my father. I found out years later that he stalked me but he never got the chance to grab me as I never went out at night for fear he would find me.
They found me again twice more after that. I kept having to move house to get away from them and them a dodgy ex boyfriend. I eventually moved to the other side of the country and gave my dodgy grandmother a PO Box address so she could send me a present. And what do you, my father starts bombarding me w ugly letters. But at least he couldn't physically find me.
Life was hard for a long time after I ran away. There were two recessions to struggle through, one entirely without work and the other with very little work. But I never once regretted leaving. Being abused because your parents brought you into the world to fix their problems then took those problems out on you is entirely on them. My parents were brought up properly, my father by his normal parents, my mother by her normal father. They were just evil children. They're gone now and can't do my niece any more harm.
Our society fails when it doesn’t know how to keep children safe. These parents aren’t really parents at all but more like captors. I’m grateful to hear kids make it out, but then again so many do not.
It really sucks that kids are forced to fend for themselves if they’re abused.
It’s not society fails parents it’s that parents failed their kids.
There are people that think and wholeheartedly believe that it would be so lovely and just so heartwarming to have a child but they physically are never going to have one because so deep down they don’t want one but they just think the idea is nice. Well when it actually happens and the woman, the girlfriend or wife gets pregnant and both are freaking out saying I don’t want this child and they don’t have enough money to get an aborted whatever, the woman ends up birthing a child and because they have no idea how to raise a child at all, the years of a child’s life are going to be hell and it’s not society’s fault, as I said it’s the parents fault because they truly did not want one but they so happened to have one.
What I mean is there are People who just completely dislike children they are fine going over to a friends house where they have their kids there but having the kids come over to their house that’s the issue, there are people that hate children I never wanna be around them which is perfectly fine children are loud they’re messy blah blah blah but that’s just normal.
Children shouldn't gave to deal with that. Some countries don't have so many children running away from home. I hate abusive parents
More of a no-contact story than a runaway one, but: My dad was a hardcore conservative fundamentalist Christian throughout my life--I lived with my parents over 1000 miles away from my dad's family, and only for that reason was I able to live a somewhat normal childhood (while my dad was politically and religiously strict, he had a rebellious streak like I did, which was why I was able to watch Harry Potter and go to normal school and what not...had I lived within proximity of his family, he would have felt more pressured to keep up appearances).
My dad was always lots of fun when I was younger, but the older I got the more I found that his penchant for being entertaining didn't mean he was perfect--and I really did think of him as my 'favorite' parent until I was 13 or 14. Once I started getting into my teenage years, normal phases and behaviors on my part started clashing with my dad's worldview. I got into metal music, so he started trying to ram me with church, constantly hyper-analyzed any merch I had for satanic imagery, and did surprise checks on my laptop.
I got a girlfriend, and he tried locking me *into* his apartment while he worked for the day--my mom came down on him hard for that one.
I realize as I'm writing this that everything I'm saying sounds kindaaaa normal, if a bit strict and definitely conservative. But it's difficult to capture the long-building context. So, some random facts about our relationship:
-I was never to argue with him. If I wanted to ask him a question, and I wasn't sure whether he'd construe it as argumentative, he'd tell me not to ask the question. There were countless instances where I'd be grounded for a week or more for a single argument. I could even google whatever we were talking about, show him that he was wrong, and that would make him even angrier.
-He wanted me to be able to read his mind. Once, I was to be home by 5:30, and since I was only down the road at the park, there was no need to give myself a wide berth to get home. I strolled into his apartment at 5:30 on the dot, and he comes stomping over to the top of the stairwell going down to the front door. He had absolute rage in his eyes, and barked "Cutting a little bit close, aren't you?" It didn't matter how much I said I was on time, to him I needed to be early in order to be on time.
-Most of these memories are from the period when I was 13-15, during which he simply up and quit his job--never actually told his boss he quit either...he just literally stopped going in. I guess he must have been getting money from his parents, but anyway, the result was that he grew even more depressed and bitter than he had been up until that point. He blocked out all the light in the house (mostly by nailing towels to hang above the windows), never did the dishes, never cleaned the bathroom, smoked up the house with his stinky cigars...and found new reasons to vent his anger at me.
-There was a hurricane, and everybody but my grandmother lost power. While everyone else was able to spend a few days at her house, my dad felt too inferior to partake (my psychoanalysis of what happened, not what he actually said) and therefore forced me to stay with him in the darkness for multiple days.
-When I spent time at my mother's house (one week on, one week off for each parent), he made me call him each night and wouldn't let me off the phone for at least an hour. This continued into my adult life, while I was trying to make new friendships and find myself--if I ever didn't call him or didn't want to talk as long as he did, he'd throw a fit and make me apologize.
I might as well skip to my adult life anyway since that's where I left the last example. He eventually moved back to the state where his family lived, and I declined to join him, instead opting to remain with my mom (it was about this point I started getting fed up with his shit). He moved back in with his parents and, to my knowledge, never worked again.
I visited him when I was 16 and again when I was 18. Not much to say about the first time aside from the fact that he was possessive as fuck over me the entire time I was there--couldn't spend as much time as I wanted with my cousins and other relatives, and the fact I didn't want to hang out with him 24/7 was incredibly insulting to his decaying and rotting self.
When I went to visit him at age 18, I made my mind up that this was coming to an end. He spent the entire time, again, badgering me for not spending enough time with him compared to other family members--because I paid for both of these trips myself (how could he have paid? Motherfucker refused to get a job), I was kind of pissed. He brought up the argument card again, and more than once--for stupid shit, too, like I didn't want to wear the amount of layers he felt I should have worn in the winter, so he screamed at me and said that it didn't matter what age I was, I *had* to obey him at all times, end of story.
I went back home, and spent the next few months planning. I wanted to do it all at once, but I didn't really become capable of ghosting shitty people until after this first self-taught lesson.
I talked to him less and less. I was attempting to adult, didn't have much time, and the time I did have was better spent with friends and my mother (who is now, and will always be, my actual favorite parent). He bit back, not much at first, but more after the first couple months. Eventually he told me he was going to a mental hospital because I had abandoned him, and that I should feel responsible for that.
I could make the next part longer, because there was a lot more to my response than that...but suffice to say, I told him with great satisfaction to fuck right off, blocked his number & facebook account...and that was it.
This had to have been 8 or 9 years ago now. The only times I've heard from him were when he sent a long text to my best friend telling her she was destined for hell, and when he simply sent the words "degenerate homosexual" to my facebook about a year later (I used my coming-out-as-bi moment to enrage him, and it was this in tandem with the mental hospital thing that gave me the courage to cast him aside).
That's it. I could go into far greater detail, but I wrote more than I meant to at the start. I only realize now, with enormous hindsight, that he was an extremely toxic, manipulative, and utterly pitiful person. Doesn't matter if they're family. If they're fucked up, throw them in the fucking trash and don't look back.
I think you could get him in trouble with law enforcement for that
@@AkameGaKillfan777 Problem was this was all so long ago, you know? I haven't talked to the dude in like 7-8 years and most of the stories I mentioned took place 10-12 years ago
Holy shit this comment is a full-blown essay
I'm glad you were able to get that all out. Sometimes we only realize things about a situation we were in when we write about it.
I moved out 3 months after I turned 18. It was all because my birth giver moved back in with my father and I. She would make up stuff, and would cause me to get beat. My dad, gave me a black eye for my 16th and 17th birthday. I tried running away at 15, the birth giver found me, and beat me with a belt. A teacher asked me, "what happened to your legs?" I said "oh I played football with my brother and his friends." When I moved out, I packed a bunch of my things, took it to my grandmother's house, after school, I grabbed it, and that was it. My dad asked why I did it, and I said you both are abusive. I got married at 19, had my daughter at 21, and divorced by 24. My ex husband was abusive too. I went to counseling, and it helped alot. I ended up taking the egg donor out of my life, and I have my father at arms length. He is a narcissist, and refuses to admit his faults, but he does love my daughter, and has changed some, since he met his new wife. I do have a wonderful husband, and a thriving 10 year old, also a great job. I do have some PTSD, anxiety and depression. But, I've came so far, from what I was 12 years ago. ❤
Good job on making it through that I hope everything can be fixed between you and your dad
Im proud of you for making it through all of that, may you have a further more enjoyable life from now on
Admittedly, I kind of feel like I should have done this when I was in Jr high/high.
Unfortunately, I had a liver and kidney transplant when I was an infant, and there's not much of a chance I had if I had to strike it out on my own.
My parents actually care about me, set up a trust to pay for college and made sure I kept on school and everything, but they wanted something completely different out of my life than I do. Admittedly, I never really experimented to learn what I wanted to do, but I felt railroaded into doing what my parents wanted of me.
I ended up bouncing in and out of community College while living with my parents and never really felt like I was making decisions for myself.
I am now 27, have my first full-time job at a decent place with decent prospects, and I'm planning on FINALLY moving out.
But I do kinda wished I had tried this much sooner
Its rough. Glad you have direction in your actions now.
I wish i have a smart mother who talk wisely, a calm collected person who respect anyone. Not a bad mouth woman with tight small brain, not a person who always saw everything from the worst persfective, not a stupid uneducated woman, not a person who only in a good mood if they have money. I wish for a mother who can make me feel better when im crying, not make it worse. I wish for a mother that truly care about her Childs mental health.
I wish i have soft spoken father that never yelled or raise his voice because his not obeyed enough, i wish i have a father who understand gender equality, not the kind of person that saw women lower than him, i wish for a father without anger issues, i wish for a father who wont leash his anger to anyone, i wish for a father with emotional stability.
I wish i can parented myself,
I wish i can fixed my life.
You’re not alone. You’re worth everything you wish for, and it sounds like you’ve had to be stronger than most. One day, you’ll be able to take care of yourself, be on your own, and deal with what is in your head. I promise it gets better. It isn’t easy, and you’ll have to struggle to feel normal (whatever that is), but you’ll be in charge of your own decisions and it will feel scary and it will be rewarding each and every time you make the best choice for yourself. I once felt like you do now and it feels now like it was another lifetime ago and happened to someone else. I was able to become my own person, face my past and accept it, and thrive. Don’t give up. Don’t let them win. Don’t let them change your heart.
Man, it’s sad to hear that some people had such horrible lives. I am grateful to still be close to my family.
it is not about closeness it is about the people
You only should be close to good people
Planning to do that in a few months. I'm not a teenager, and my mother isn't abusive, but we just can't live under the same roof anymore. Already got a house lined up with my SOs, and they're in a situation that would have fit better here (mentally-abusive mother, sister, and BIL). We need to cut ourselves from the constant toxic negativity permeating our family home.
We had this planned for almost the ten years we've been together. Wish us luck
I appreciate everyone who continues to post their stories in the comments. I know you’re doing so much better. Proud of you 👍🏼
I tried to run away so many times but the cops kept bringing me back, no matter how much I pleaded not to or even cried I’d rather go to jail then back to that foster home
How are you now?
@@haruzita2828bad, why?
I started running away at 3 yrs old. I made it out for good at 11. My mom was a covert narcissist, who used everything to abuse me, verbal, emotional, & physical. When I was 6, she beat me with a wire clothes hanger from my neck to my ankles. So at 11 I made it out for good. I lived i the juvenile system & friends couches. Got my GED at 15 & numerous jobs. Everything I went through away from home was worth it. I met & married my best friend at 21 until he died in 2011. Since then my mom has continued to abuse me until I was 53. I finally cut her out of my life for good. Life has been so much better everytime I cut her out.
Wow omg that's crazy! Why you do it?
Never ever go back to your parents, they will never change
Okay... to all those who came from toxic homes and ran away, i am your family now.
I am only one guy, but i am your dad now. I just want to let you know i love you, i am proud you and inknow you are going to be alright in life
Right on.if you can't be with your family from blood or adoption.find a better one.i still have mom and bro sis but my real family I feel comfortable with I found in AA.
Are you a Mormon?
@@mwillblade no
Hey dad can I borrow some money thanks
@@RandomTrinidadian Then you must be a cult leader.
I joined the Navy never wanted to join the Military but it was the quickest escape. I'm 37 now and life is great.
I left my house at 18. Never looked back.love freedom.i can't relax unless I'm under my own roof.even roommates are no good
I liked having roommates until I had a gap where I didn’t have one. Usually I found a new one by the time the other moved out but this time I didn’t and I can’t go back. COVID showed me who I am. A hermit.
@@fieryjalapenos4442 Lol
The second one. I was also forbidden to get a job, move out, go to college/university and get my drivers licence at 17/18. It sucks seeing your siblings be able to do all those things. I’m still struggling with my life and I’m constantly being told how I’m such a failure and the cause of all my parents problems. I can’t make plans for the future without them all being shut down and told I’m not good enough to do anything
The story in the video made my blood boil, and so does yours. You might have to do something like what they did, and secretly make plans behind their back and escape when the time is right.
Don't tell them your plans, you don't need their permission or support. Learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all. Don't get comfortable with the chaos.
@@carbro_320 i agree on this one. 6 months of working quietly running my dropshipping business and making $2400 a month (its quite a lot in my country) and decided to save up to move out at the end of 2022. im so ready to move out.
@@powla3330 I wish you well on your journey. Not sure what country you're in but ensure you save a lot and manage credit wisely. I'm looking into drop shipping as well.
All these stories make me feel incredibly grateful that my mom is a wonderful woman. She’s tough, but never mean/abusive, and she told me one day that I’m the only person in this world she’d willingly sacrifice her life to save mine. She loves me to the moon and back and I never once considered running away
It is also very humbling because you really think that you have a tough life and circumstances and the you hear these things. You get a total new appreciation and excitement for life
I am in a situation where i barely speak or see my dad (my only living parent), he was controlling and toxic, wanting to decide every aspect of my life from clothing, diet even to my relationships, which is nuts considering i was a man in my 30's, i eventually found the strength to leave and haven't looked back since.
In my case, physical abuse never took the upperhand and only happened briefly a few times, really. But the thought of what they could do to me if they suddenly snapped, did and still terrifies me to my core. I've dealt with a a lot of emotional neglect, psychological abuse, narcissism and at the same time infantalizing behaviour and overprotectivenes.
Back in 2017 I spent 6 months living in a caravan on my parents' driveway, save for showering and a minor part of my meals, just to get some distance between me and them. Then, after I had put a lot of effort in cleaning and maintaining it, my parents sold it and I was forced back. I did move rooms to be much further away from them though.
Then in 2019 I was kicked out after deciding to tell them I was going to persue medical treatment for a private matter they did not agree with. After a week my mom showed up 'in support of my niece', and forced me to come back again even though I was extremely scared. When my brother's wife came in and asked if I wanted to stay with them I just cried and said "yes, but what can I do?". She didn't look me in the eye for the rest of the time I was there.
Several times I was fully prepared to pick up my tent and go be homeless, and right now I'm packing my things up in order to move in with a friend of mine who is renting a house. I'm working slowly for now so I can financially benefit from the holidays a bit. I do have upcoming exams but I'll figure that out.
I have a student job and work as a translator on a freelance basis but it's far from enough. I hope I can make it this time.
Wow omg I'm sorry
I’m 21 and have switched back and forth between my grandparents and my dad my whole life so idk if this is really considered “running away”. I recently left and started living with my boyfriend. The day I left, I had to call the police on my sister for attacking me and punching me after we got into a verbal altercation. My grandma lied to the police to protect my sister. My dad wasn’t even home and when he got there shortly after my boyfriend he started yelling at me for calling the cops on family. I told him I deserve to live in a place I don’t have to worry about when the next time I’m going to get punched is going to be. He didn’t have any argument against that but followed me outside and started saying I’m emotionally manipulative (specifically because after multiple conversations with my grandma about my BFF since FIRST GRADE staying at her house with us because their parents were abusing them my grandma agreed because she loves me, because to my dad emotional honesty is manipulation). When I got in the car, he yanked my door open to continue yelling at me then threatened to call the cops on me when I pushed him away from the door. Lots of yelling ensued, dad almost went after my boyfriend for honking the car to try and get us to stop yelling (good thing dad didn’t cause I was ready to defend my boyfriend). I was finally able to get the door closed and left with just the few things I packed. I have gone back to get more of my stuff multiple times. I just talked to my sister for the first time since it happened and while I didn’t get any sort of apology she did give me candy and homemade pumpkin bread. She’s my twin, I’m always going to have a place for her in my heart. I haven’t seen my dad and I don’t really want to. But at least he’s not living with grandma anymore. The man slut got a new girlfriend and already moved in with her. Let’s see how long it takes for him to get tired of her. Thanksgiving should be…interesting.
I’d also just like to say that a few months before this my family literally ruined my birthday for me over a game of among us. My family just doesn’t really care about me. And so so so many things have happened my whole life, I also cut off my half sister for her reaction to my sister abusing me. Luckily she’s apparently not going to be at thanksgiving, if I’m lucky she’ll skip Christmas too.
@@SunBeeSmokedwow damn I understand 😭😭😭
It started when my mom asked me to fix the leak in the shower. When she turned the water off, my sperm donor verbally abused her. I overheard it all and told him to stop being such a dick. He defended his actions saying things like "You'll understand when you're married" and "Why should I take marriage advice from my unmarried son?"
My mom and I left for the day to clear out heads. My sperm donor texted her saying "If you call the police on me, you'll regret it." A family friend who happens to be a cop told us we were in danger and to not return to the sperm donor.
18 months and a bitter divorce later, my mom and I share an apartment together, I do not regret anything.
Jesus. After reading all of the comments here and on the video, I am more grateful that I grew up in an environment with loving parents, brother, and family.
Hearing what people have gone through breaks my heart.
I had a great childhood but went off the rails starting at 15. Been 35 years of hell ever since. I just cling to my childhood memories now since I'm too old and disabled to really have a good life.
@@chrissyellem7397omg why
@@beautifulflower327 Just been with 3 narcissists and one was a sociopath and they derailed my life so bad. Just can't do anything about it now.
I didn't finish the video, it's rather depressing, but I was expecting more stories of parents leaving their SO and children behind. I guess these people don't particularly care to share their stories...
They do. You're looking for parents who left their families or fathers who walked out stories. In those threads you also get stories from both sides the left and who left. These stores are more along the line of children running away
My mom hauled âss when she was 17. She loved her family and still does, they all have great contact, she just says that the "good old days" were crazy and so was her family. Her parents weren't understanding and any negative emotion was seen as "these damn kids are so sensitive" to them. This was how parenting was at the time, so she doesn't hold it against them. I love my grandparents, they're great people, but definitely flawed. They were good but crazy, and she had to get out of there.
Parents: abuses child
Child: runs away from home
Parents: *Surprised Pikachu Face*
My husband left his parents after they had a huge meltdown over us moving to another country (a decision we hadn't made or talked about at the time but something we later did because of their behaviour). They refused to have a relationship with our daughter as a result and tried to convince him to divorce me and take custody of our child (she was 10 weeks old at the time) so they could have access to her. They kept thousands of dollars of our stuff, used to show up at our house and "borrow" stuff all the time (they had a key and would let themselves in to borrow stuff) and expected us to look after them. We haven't spoken to them in 6 years and don't look back.
Got kicked out at 16 9 months pregnant had my son 1 week latter, graduated school went to college quit college had to work had to take care of my kid,went back to college I learnt how to be a adult at 16 but I'm glad cuz since I was 12 I had to take care of myself.I been in the same relationship since I was 16 we now have 5 wonderful boys both work good jobs have our own place we are about to buy a house soon.so yah although life sucks a lot es.since my mental health working hard paid off.
My best friend is a few years younger than me and he lives with a very abusive family. He says if it weren't for me, he would have offed himself a long time ago. I'm always there for him and when he moves out, I'm going to help him get out of there.
Why do people abuse things? A kid is supposed to be the one you have unconditional love for are supposed to bring happiness and meaning to your life, but if you're just gonna beat/starve/sexually abuse/abandon the kid, why get one, especially through adoption?
It’s your good fortune to not understand this. Short answer: Abuse needs a target. More detail: Adoptive parents often think relationships will make them feel complete, so the parent/child power imbalance Is an appealing sort of relationship. Kids with the abandonment wound are pretty easy to please (and bring the bonus of conferring the mask of sainthood), and are subsidized through the foster care system. It’s more often than not exploitative narcissism, which is the (unaware) very antithesis of nurturant parenting. They love what they have a use for, much like politicians regarding constituents (too arrogant to realize their “love“ is a depravity inflicted for their own benefit). The politician analogy might seem a little odd but I chose it because the desire to govern others is definitively indicative of not having as much concern for the interests of the governed as for one’s own (plus elections are sorta pageant-like popularity contests in which the contenders say whatever wins much like parents who want kids too badly to realize someone who thinks a relationship will make them complete cannot be completed by anything until they grow the fuck up and complete themselves)
I was 19 or so at the time and preparing for my SAT in the US (I was homeschooled so normal semesters didn't apply here). My toxic narcissistic mother wouldn't stop being verbally and emotionally abusive to the point where I couldn't even focus or study, so I said "fuck the SAT" and booked a ticket to London, where I lived as a child, with only $500 to my name. Just took my shit and left. No clue what I was gonna do. I lived in a hostel for a few weeks before contacting my father in Spain who I had never known. He wasn't all that bad. Lived in Spain with him for a few months, then my grandmother on my father's side wires $15000 as a gift to my account and I am able to promptly move to London proper. It was hard at first but it was worth it. My mother has been effectively cut off from my life since then. I regret nothing.
I left right after turning 18. I waited until I was legal so that no one could send me back. I moved to the opposite side of the planet, without knowing anyone, or the language, or having a job lined up. Life was hard for the first years, ngl. I survived by teaching English. Now I own my house, have a full-time job, two kids, and a happy life. I regret nothing.
If you don't mind me asking, what country did you move to?
@@EndlessSummer888 Argentina
Good for you!
@@seren6696boo
There is actually a youtube channel by an abusive mother telling her side of the story (playing victim) after her daughter went no-contact. Even with only telling her side of the story, being able to freely lie and twist as she wants, the 10 videos she has shaken me to my core.
She is pretty open about how crazy people's advice is of respecting her child as an adult human being and sees no point in repairing the relationship if she didn't plan on becoming her chew toy again. She is whining about this crazy mental illness her child is suffering from that makes her believe she can have opinions and stuff.
Worst thing? She is a smart, successful person. She just can't wrap her head around the idea that her child is not property. And she sees no point in treating her child as something else, as her property. And she makes a mockery of the last letter her daughter wrote her, but still reads the whole thing.
I never permanently ran from home, but I would often sneak out to stay at friend's houses while my mom was in a bad mood. I always had a runaway bag packed (Food, water, extra money, notebooks, etc).
They all knew how my mom was, and their parents let me stay over at their houses until my dad would pick me up to take me to my nana's house (He often left the house with my brothers to go to my grandma's while my mom was freaking out)
I live with my nana now and life is a lot better now that I'm not required to spend time with her, but there were a lot of times where I really considered grabbing a bus and leaving for good.
I didn't run away but was kicked out. My parents only really started to get physically abusive whenever we got older. Years of poverty and living in a motel room with maybe one meal a day and tattered, second-hand clothing. October 6th, 2019, i was 18 and feesh outbof highschool trying to get a job ans improve my life. My mothee attacked my brother after he rose his arms in a defensive motion as she was in his face and screaming, being belligerent and throwing things. She made him late for the bus over this and i eventually couldn't take watching it any longer. I snapped and forced myself between them and held her so my brother could grab his stuff and run. I didn't hurt her, only kept her from moving and onlu after he was too far to be chased i let her go. She took my key and forced me to leave without my stuff. Thankfully my mom had to work and my dad was willing to let me in to pack up. Despite being fall, the heat was blistering, i spent all day lugging a small wagon with my stuff in 5 miles away to my grandmother who took me in. My best friend got me a cheap smartphone and a month of service so i could get a job. My grandma barely had enough income between her social security and EBT to feed herself, let alone 3 people (my brother came with me). We barely made it the next few months, always hungry because we had to ration food. I met my now fiancé around this time, both her and her family made Thanksgiving possible that year and i still thank them for that. Decembee 9th was my first day at my first job and from there I only got better, both emotionally and financially. Since then, my fiancé and i closed the distance, we now live together with her family and couldn't be happier. I'm working on starting a career in Real Estate to hopefully grow my wealth and make better choices than my parents.
If you take anything from this, know that you're not powerless and you CAN be happy. It won't alway be easy, but you can come out of the other side in one piece.
I was locked out the house after the woman that adopted me and I had an arguement. Shechad always been over protective to an extreme. I was never allowed anywhere without her, wasn't allowed to have friends, she even refused to give me a key to the house. Joke was on her. I had graduated from nursing school, passed my state board exam, and was helped by a classmate to find a place of my own after I got a job. The only time I went back was when she died in a house fire. I felt bad about it but frankly I felt worse about the dog dying than her. After the shock and grief came a sense of relief. I was finally free.
My great aunt had three kids and kicked them all out in this order of age
16 kicked out
15 kicked out
14 kicked out. Now all of her kids are horrible and she's losing her legs and being put into a home
"People who ran away from home, where did you go?"
Haha 😂 Nice try, dad 😂😂😂😂
As someone with a very privileged upbringing who still regularly resents his parents for various reasons, I feel humbled...
I feel so bad for some of you kids. You are all good enough and deserve love. I love you all, gay, cis, white, black, asian and any other group,colors or sexuality. Learn to respect yourself and your boundaries. ❤️
I didn't go NC with my family until I was 33 but looking back, I should've done it much sooner. I was out of the house several years by then, but I delayed moving out because of my younger brother and sister- I thought I was protecting them from the abuse. Probably no surprise to anyone that as adults, they were more loyal to and acted like my abusive mom- if I would've let them, they would've drained me of all my money, just for one abusive example. I should've saved myself and gotten out as soon as I could instead of waiting until my mid 20s. Better late than never, though, and life is so much better now without any of them in it. They blame my husband, of course, because he's so controlling lol. If they knew me half as well as they thought they did, they'd know and remember that I'm pretty damned strong-willed- one reason we clashed so much before I cut them all off. Hubby is awesome and my family is now my chosen family. Only regret is waiting too long to go NC.
I've never ran away but I'm seriously considering it.
I hate everything in my life.
My brother is so immature , rude (ex. He said Shrek could draw way better than me, your stupid etc.) And he says its my job not to argue back because he has autism
My mom takes her anger out on me and my siblings and even encouraged us to run away.
My dad is really mean and he forces us to clean all the time.
Basically I only have two supporters my best friend and my sister...I just don't know what to do..running away won't solve me hating myself but it would solve my home problems
I hate myself because I'm so stupid... I literally blamed my brother for something I did..
Don't think of yourself as stupid because it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. Think more highly of yourself and your efforts and that can help. Try avoiding your toxic family as much as safely possible. Maybe get a job to save up if you're old enough but I hope you can trust your parents if they have access to your bank account. If you can make one without them then great. Work on those things you feel you aren't smart about. Maybe you blamed your brother for something because he usually does things to mess you you so you assumed it was him without thinking or making sure. Maybe try only acting when you are sure. Would you like to share your drawings with me on discord?
Call social services (if it's in your area) for guidance
@@carbro_320 or have some good counselors if they can help.
I never understand parents who keep trying to drive their kids away only to have a Surprise Pikachu Face when they do leave.
If my mom keeps yelling, if she keeps using porfiera as her get-out-of-jail free card, if she continues to verbally abuse me, I'm taking advice from this video, and I'm running off to th bus stop in my trailer park. And then I'm calling my dad, where I'll tell him "Dad, I don't wanna live with mom anymore. I wanna live with you. I'm at the bus stop."
And then, in a perfect world, I'd be living with him and my step mom, and my step brother would be there, playing video games with me. And I'd never see my mom for a year, and then I'd finally be ready to look at this sick woman's face.
Don't avoid longer higher educations "just because". But make sure you do a through evaluation of the future prispects if work in that field, that the actual jobs there interest and motivate you, and that you have a realistic plan B for financing. Taking educational routes that generate formal qualifications along the way, not just after a 5-7+ year stint, can also be a good idea. Sticking it out 1-2 rough year(s) is a lot more realistic than 4-5.
"Taking a class on the Grateful Dead", . . . . . .college is a waste of time.
Who said it was college?
I actually never ran away.. but I was going to try to move out anyways. I was never going to say anything; but I had to move back in with my family to get out of an abusive relationship, where I heard my dad say once my youngest brother moved out that they were going to get a foster kid. I told my mother what happened to me as a kid and she threw me out of the house; threw all my shit into garbage bags and texted me that night saying they were getting a lawyer.
My heart broke; I’ve never been a huge cop fan, but they put me up in a hotel that night so I wouldn’t have to sleep in my friend’s car I was using. (That friend didn’t want me to stay at their house in case my dad went crazy, along with everyone who knew and pushed me to tell her. Everyone told me she’d believe me and then turned a blind eye, letting me live in a shelter and just try to figure it out as a struggling, underdeveloped 20 year old.)
Ended up moving in with someone who kinda helped me get back on my feet before they kicked me out too, on the TUESDAY of thanksgiving week, my stuff had to be out by Saturday. I really started to believe it was my fault, but my now boyfriend swooped me up and just really helped me see how shitty people can be. He’s helping build my confidence back up and I love him so much for being so patient with me, I’ve never had anyone do this. Going on a year now and still going strong ❤️ still haven’t talked to my parents. Things are going pretty well though, I have a steady job (for a 21 year old), and yeah I put school on hold, but I’m living with someone now who loves me and cares about me and wants me around which has been working on my confidence. I’m still transitioning into a healthier person, and it’s a rocky road, but I look at who I was and who I am now and I see improvement, it just took awhile to really get past the stuck on areas, and I’m not done yet, but I’m getting there.
The last thing I sent my mother was about how this isn’t how normal mothers react and the damage she was doing to me; where she proceeded to scream at me that I must be lying because I never said anything when I was younger, (completely not true, at 11 I carved whore into my wrist even though I’d never had consensual sex at my age, sorry I didn’t realize that wasn’t a good enough sign of being abused), and I was nuts, and being mean to her. I forgot being mean to her was saying “hey you’re hurting my feelings because you’re supposed to be my mom and this is all fucked up,” and is a personal attack on her because she couldn’t take responsibility even if it would save her fucking life.
Parents fucking suck, but I saw this comment on a Reddit thread once that I love and try to live by; “just because you were destined to fail doesn’t mean you did.” If you’re hurting, get out; it’s not going to be easy, but you will be so much happier in the long run, I guarantee you. You have to get past the fears and brainwashing deeply entrained in your mind. Sometimes I still cry about my parents because I miss my brothers, but at the end of the day, I finally did what was right for me.
Just wanted to add one last thing; the thing I’ve been struggling with recently- it’s just crazy to me how we haven’t talked in almost 8 months, and she doesn’t even care to make sure I’m not fucking dead. Mother of the year bro, mother of the year..
@@WildHorizonexactly fr 💯💯💯
Ran away from home today. My mother destroyed the door I locked to hide behind while begging her to stop yelling at me.
Not sure how this is going to work out. But she's trying to make it sound like I'm delusional and this isn't abuse because it's her right to hurt me.
I just can't continue living like this.... but I might have to go back again. Back to more abuse.
Bruh why come back again?
Hello there, I saw your comment today and I really hope that you've made it... And even if not, please know that I'm cheering for you... All the best...
Honestly ive been really wanting to run away but im only fourteen.
My parents(especially my mom) are very abusive, mentally and physically, and will lash out over the smallest things. They even make fun of me ever since i told them i was r@p3d at nine years old by my dads friend who was babysitting me. They love to trigger my ptsd by grabbing at my waist or my neck.
Theyre also very abusive towards each other and im waiting so badly until i have either proof of them doing the shit they do or they kick me out(theyve threatened to so many times over the years)
I spend most days locked in my bedroom and eating one meal a day because they think thats the way to raise a child. My mom at one point used to feed me dog food and cigarette butts when i was ten.
Worst part is, i never thought anything was wrong about it until my friends found out by coming over one day randomly
Have you talked to someone at school or someplace else that you think is trustworth
There's got to be some one/thing that can help you
@@DICKNSful the only person ive talked to abt it is my online bsf and she cant really do anything about it
@@quin_tessenc3 can you do anything to get evidence? Like borrowing a phone from a friend if you don't have your own and keeping the voice memo running in your pocket? Taking pictures of bruises? Then if you go to a teacher you trust, when they contact Social Services (teachers are mandatory reporters) you'll be able to properly explain why they should take you away from that house. My heart goes out to you.
Haven’t yet but I’ve been having thoughts of running away.. not because of family issues but because there’s too many bad memories of the horrible person I used to be attached to this environment. I have a saving plan but for it to work it’ll take a whole year.
honestly if you’re old enough and you feel like it’s the best option then i support you! good luck man :)
gotta do what's best for you, but if you like your family make sure you don't burn your bridges. Stay in touch, show you care and didn't feel that they were the problem
A year will go by fast if you make a smaller schedule of plans. Trust me I've been living a hell life for 35 years and have many regrets. One year and you'll be free. Good luck.
My parents (mostly my dad) and i had a lot of really bad fights, and i would usually run away weeks at a time. After constant physical fights they decided to make me leave the country and send me to Mexico (where we are from). I was born in mexico and at 8months old I was brought to the US up the time I was 17 y/o. I decided to go ahead and leave just to get away. I left completely alone the summer before senior year of high school. It was incredibly hard but it was the best they could have ever done for me. Im now 24, I havnt seen my parents since, and dont plan on going back home
Taught myself how to shave and work on my car before my mother met my step dad (basically my real dad) and he taught me everything I know now
I went no contact with my entire family after realizing just how abusive, racist and hateful they really were. My mother frequently abused me as a child, and the rest of the family took her side with the same reaction: she’s still your mom. No. Moms don’t threaten to have you arrested over a verbal argument then choose your abusive stepdad over you.
As if that wasn’t bad enough, no one in my family knows the meaning of “no means no”. I can’t tell you how often I’ve been grabbed, slapped, verbally accosted and made the villain simply for asking that they not touch me (I’m autistic and I have nerve damage. Being touched physically hurts me at times)
On top of all of this: my grandmother frequently called black folks the n word and would scream “I’m not your n-word!”, simply for asking for a bottle of water if she was already going to the kitchen.
It’s been one year since I left and I only regret not leaving sooner. I’m finally at peace.
To anyone living with an abusive family, just know there is a way out, and it’s worth taking the risk if you can afford to do so. You’re not alone, even if, like me, you feel like you are.
As a child I started running away at 4-5 years old lasted until 17. Was running towards something but still don't why.
I have nothing but respect for these ppl. I wish I had the guts run away. But I have no where to go😢
I left my family house legally. I was 18. Grew up in a money orientated household, abusive and driven into a depressed by another family member to the point I was on the brink of suicide.
Moved out and totally cut them out. Haven't spoke to them for 11 years, not once. I have 4 kids and a wife and they don't know any of it. I only speak to 2 family members and they're not in contact with them. It's awesome! No regrets. Living comfortably, depression free and in a loving household.
11:51
The part where it said( it took several years for my mother and i to speak again but we do so and it only works if we don’t bring up the past ) that’s not how you should do it, The past is not going to heal or ever go away or even begin to ever go away if you don’t confront your mother on why she did those things to you and confront your abusive brother on why he did those things to you. So you’re just gonna do it just like how my father did it to my mother then, he wasn’t physically abusive but he was immensely and I mean horribly immensely mental abusive and emotional abusive to my mother and us and I mean us kids. If I were you, The only way I would ever even think about talking to her is if you and her agreed to meet and talk and she explained why she did the things that she did to you and after she explained you got up and left and told her to not contact me I will contact you and tell you if I’m ready to make a relationship again with you. People like your mother who can pretend the past did not happen and when you bring it up she gets upset or whatever, that is you bringing up stuff that she did to you and her only excuse is to get angry at you, if she does that, then she has not matured at all and she is only put on a façade. I really do hope that you your mother and both of your brothers can have a normal family again but you’re just not handling it the correct way, leaving when you did yes that was the correct thing to do don’t get me wrong that was but the way you handled it, when you spoke to your mother and you believed that she had changed, your mother is still the same but to meet you she put on a fake face, but you just can’t see past it.
I really hope the rest of your life is filled with happiness and adventures.
I was thinking the exact same thing. If it cant be talked about or acknowledged, then the mother shouldnt be forgiven. She isnt being sorry, she is just wanting to forget so she doesnt have to put any effort to truly being a better person.
@@ahappilydrunkpuppy8961 exactly.
Current parent of 6 kids. Aged 20, 18, 17, 14, 12, 9
I am the son of an abusive hateful Karen who also came from abuse.
Fuck abusive parents.
The sooner you evict them from your life, the healthier you will be.
You can break the cycle, just love your kids, respect their rights, respect their privacy, respect their property, don’t forget what it was like to grow up with oppression.
Abusers try to twist the phrase “forgive and forget” to mean they can do whatever they want and get away with it. But that is a perversion of the truth, and a perversion of Christianity if that’s how you roll.
If anybody, thinks that Jesus or any other God intended for abusers to be able to get away with whatever they want and then be able to guilt you into coming back for more abuse by them saying “forgive and forget” then I’m happy to tell you that is not what any healthy person, or God wants for you.
Forgive and forget is for your own mental health, not for the abuser. For your own health you have to get zen and forgive them because they don’t deserve any space in your head where you think about how much you hate them, that only hurts you and detracts from your happiness.
Then the “forget” part means you cut them out of your life. You forget that they ever existed as best as you can.
If you believe “terrible two’s “ are a thing, you’ll make it come true.
If you believe “teenagers” are awful arrogant assbastards, then you’ll make it come true.
Forget those cunty labels!
It’s consigning your children and you to misery before they even have a chance, and it’s a hateful thing to do to the poor people.
Remember that your job is to start with an entirely dependent newborn baby, and then in 18 short years, teach them as much as you can so that they are independent and can function in the world and not be crushed by reality when it inevitably comes rolling along like a steamroller freight train.
Then learning to be independent can be hard.
Them learning to analyze things on their own can be hard to watch.
Watching them ignore your advice but letting them do it, and not running over their freedom with your experience can be hard. But if you’ve given them your input and they want to go with a different choice, then their experience will be a very good teacher also.
Although sometimes you get surprised and find out that they did actually have a better idea that worked better than your experience.
Then everyone wins.
My dad abused me pretty badly ran away when I was seven…. I constantly look back wondering if I did the right thing. Ngl getting kinda misty eyed just writing this lol.
I moved out once when i was 17,but had to go back for my mother had passed out when she found out i left.
Im 21 now and i eant to eventually leave again,my towm is a hole,sometimes i walk 20,30 km,but the image of my mother passing out again haunts me,im a prisioner of that past and cant move on,but i want to.
These stories make me so SO happy that my parents support my dream career and try to help me on planning my future they are amazing parents indeed I'm sorry for the hardships you had to indour
So sometimes when I get into really bad argument with my parents after I get hit or something I would get my iPad and go outside into the backyard for either 30 minutes to an hour then I'll come in once I got my stuff together
Where the hell was CPS when these people were being chased down by cops?
I'm So happy for that first person! where ever they are, i wish them All the luck and talent in the world! I dont usually get quite that mushy to random r/ videos, but fuq it im drunk and vulnerable and no one deserves that level of disrespect, especially from the only reason you exist in the first place. You live your best life random, but just a valid, guy you!
Be well!
You know I'm wondering about something (for U.S. Citizens). If you were to run away.. sure you can do it, but what about stuff like the birth certificate and social security..? The parents still have it and how is one going to replace that and make sure that the parents won't do anything shady with the info they already have?
Man, I cant believe sometimes that my story actually had a good ending, my parents were abusive but completely turned around and changed. I still don't trust them, and sometimes I worry they only did it so I would feel guilty if I ever wanted to leave them, but life is actually normal now and I'm not considering suicide any more (because if I needed to run I'd have nowhere to go, not to mention I suffer from hardcore depression and anxiety and don't have anyone else in the entire world. Running away would most likely end up in me being... tortured or killed by people)
Ok for context I’m adopted to two beautiful women they adopted my sister before me so naturally they thought adopting me would only be the right thing to do. But even so. One of my mothers was really manipulative, narcissistic, and emotionally/mentally abusive. She has always threatened to hit me and my sister whenever things didn’t go her way. Not always going through with it but she made it so like she was. I also found out she was a very codependent, narcissistic mother with a victim complex. Anyway by the age of 14 I’m depressed and rlly contemplating ending it the abuse was so bad that my other mum we’ll call her mum.R took me away to live with my sister(her daughter not my sister she got kicked out from both homes lol but that’s another story that not mine to tell). Mum.R and her side of the family really helped me with my undiagnosed mental issues. They helped me get rid of the habits I used to conform to my mother. To clarify mum.R and mother split when I was around 4 I think but mother she was like this to mum.R, my sister, and now me unfortunately. I do have a somewhat good relationship with mother but was pretty good nit too long ago but she got to comfortable and didn’t respect my boundaries in doing so she acted out and kicked me out. Out of impulse but she then realised that, that was her last chance to ever have a good standing relationship with me. Now I just really tolerate her whenever I see her(me see her is because my sister sister has a kid now so we go over to let her see the kid) but I’m in a good place now, but I also want my mother to bee in a good place but she doesn’t want to change so I’ll just let her suffer which will only because she didn’t want to better herself nor change which is ok for me since it’s not my problem ;d
Glad you're better now
If your family doesn't want to change, the kids are the LAST people you want them to see. They belong to you, not them.
This is the most heartbreaking stuff to hear
Agreed
@@seren6696why
Eloped at 15 with my boyfriend he was 19. We got engaged one weekend and left the following weekend.
We got married at 16 & 19 never has any relationship with our parents after that.
23:15 "sort of smoked weed," So does that mean it got burned like incense instead of rolling it into a joint?
i think it’s more about them not wanting to admit it or there might be some shitty arguments attached to the son doing drugs
I left my home state at 30. I’m just getting my mental health under control at 32. My family life was long over or at least time is required before we can really rebuild again. I won’t ever live in my home state unless it’s to visit my parents, mom at the cemetery and dad is still alive. I feel so awkward around my family overall. Bpd and dissociation isn’t safe to try and see them right now. Newly diagnosed. Things are feeling better emotionally.
I always wonder how many of these cases have the "victim" actually being the bad guy, spinning the story to us to make the other party look bad, while in reality, they're borderline, narcissistic or lack the ability to self criticize.
I could see my sister talking about my mom being “abusive” and her cutting her off. She’s not abusive, she just wouldn’t pay for my sisters shit anymore (who’s 28 years old). My sister has BPD. As soon as she couldn’t get money from my mom she refused to talk to her.
Oh, yes. Like these kids who say they were kidnapped at 2am and sent to a brat camp. Parents don't do that stuff for fun, if only because those camps cost $$$. "Well, I was going through difficult phase..." yea, you were probably terrorising the neighbourhood until 1am.
Yeah I’m willing to bet that at least a handful of these “kids” were doing stuff that didn’t help the situation. But of course we only hear their version of events. The truth is, people won’t make themselves look bad if they can help it.
This is probably pretty accurate for alot of these reddit topics if we’re being honest man lol
@@joshduthie3401 that's not actually true. I've heard of perfectly fine kids being sent off because their parents didn't really want them around or felt it wasn't perfect enough and these camps ruin or kill them. Not hearing from their kids for months isn't normal.
My great grandma moved away to marry my great grandfather. Not really running away but it still sort of fits
Some people shouldn't have children
pertaining to the second story, the parents don't deserve any part of their child's life when they're married and have children.
I don't think I could ever forgive my oldest sister for the things she did to me when I was younger. We haven't spoken in 10 years but I'm scared of what would happen. What I would do to someone.
25:14 I feel the same about the name thing. Every time I hear my first name or the nickname my family gave me, it feels like I'm still connected to them somehow when thats the very last thing I'd ever want to be. Very much considering changing my name.
More people simply need to just go no contact with their parents or other “loved ones...” I’m not saying it’s easy but damn can it be preferable to the alternative. You just have to get to the point where you realize that these people are just going to make your life worse. Period. End of story...
So, I am thinking of running away and I want to start fresh. My father is Mentally and Physically abusive. He lashes out on me for fun and uses a metal bar and beats my bare behind, again just for fun. He holds me back from the sport I love (Football) and he wants me to pursue his dreams of becoming a state champ in Wrestling. I've never told anyone this, but he also abuses my brother. My mom would be traumatized if me and him both left. She lashes out on me too, but not as badly. I need more tips to run away intelligently. I've been saving money, but my Father Takes it and says, "It's for you to live with me," I'm 13 and I live in the State of WV, can anyone help?
The fact that everyone says it's the best thing they've ever done. It's Confusing, because everyone says it's a bad thing, also that you're a bad person if you do. My dad has laughed at me for even running away. I have once and I was grounded and beaten for exactly 76 days. I threaten to stay with my mom, but nobody ever files for a court date. He makes fun of me for it... and it's just making everything worse
Massachusetts runaway use the trains for running away I do not know if you have to be older than 13 cause that’s our age limit but ya. Hope things better . Me and my friend are running away this summer
@@ainsanewriter380 why? Omg
i just left my house. my cat is gonna have to stay at my brothers and i’m staying with my ex. like literally earlier today. working on finding a place off my own, and should probably look for a better paying job, but i don’t have a license yet. been crying all day. i hope to move to oregon and start a good life, but for now i’m confused and angry in utah. :/
What city in orgaen?
Wow really proud of some of these people. I always wanted to run away and start over but instead I ended up hooking up with narcissists who would rule my life until I could finally get away. Only 1 1/2 years of my life have been truly free. I'm stuck in another situation I can't get out of since I'm disabled now I'm never going to have a good life.
Damn I understand, but why?
@@beautifulflower327 I had cardiomyopathy back in 2005 due to all the stress my ex narcissist husband put me through. I have a damaged heart doctors told me I wouldn't make it 10 years but's been 17 now. Any day I could keel over but I try and eat better lost 50 pounds last year so I can stay around for my son. Just don't have the resources to start over and being sick no one will hire me.
@@chrissyellem7397 wow omg I'm so sorry for hearing that! How old are you?
I left home for 10 months and it was the most beautiful thing, now I’m home again and I couldn’t be more miserable :)
I hope you eventually find a way out.
@@yellowishgreendragon.-.why? U hate me
I remember this guy Alexander. In MTL. bought him wine and smokes we shared. I wonder if he ever made it to Newfoundland
Anyone can be a mother or father, but not everyone can be a parrent
I left at 19 and only came back on visits. It's because I was an adult.
Ohhhh I wanted so bad to run away but my abusive dad convinced me I’d never survive.
I really hate him.
I'm 66 and thinking about running away from home. Guys, do not get married.
Everyone don't get married lol. I failed at marriage multiple times but I was married to narcissists. Worst decisions ever. If you have the means to get out go do it. Even a few years of peace will be worth it.
If you’re 18 and over, you left home, you didn’t run away
Why? How about 17 or younger?
I still in touch with my mom's side but not dad's.i got a new trustworthy and reliable family in AA.
Oh definately don't trust counselors. Had a run-in with my daughter's counselor in high school. Counselor was bat-shit crazy. I don't know what world she grew up in but in my world, you're there and paid to HELP kids. She did absolutely nothing but cause angst. Btw, daughter is very successful young woman who makes games and develops them for the world. Proud mom here.