Agreed. Especially if it's a woman that is taken (especially married), it's just extremely uncomfortable. If you're not interested in me, don't flirt with me. It isn't fun, it's stupid.
Whenever anyone flirts, its because they are trying to get some emotional need met. S9 when some in a commited relationship flits, its probably because they arent getting their needs met trough their relationship, but that doesnt mean theyre willing to abandon the investment their relationship represents, theyre basically outsourcing. You can do some flirting back, but just know thats all it is.
yeah seriously haha imagine being invisible for months or even years and then a cute girl starts flirting with you but she doesn't actually think you're attractive and is just talking to you because she's bored. that would crush me.
I agree that the gym is an extreme gray area. I watched a buddy of mine get completely humiliated by this girl at the gym he approached whom he thought was giving him choosing signals by making eye contact and wearing tight colorful clothes. He went over and asked "hey how's your workout going" while she was resting and she completely lost it by making a scene and yelling "why can't I workout just once without a guy bothering me". It got bad to the point nearby guys came over to check on her and a staff member had to ask what happened. He said that was easily the most embarrassing moment of his life and he'll never do another gym approach again because of it. It scarred him lol.
Wrong my friend. If you were getting married would you still be wearing the same pair of shoes as you would when going to the gym? If you were taking your lady to a high class restaurant would you wear the one pair of shoes for the gym as for the restaurant? Owning one pair of shoes says you are prepared for only one event with the lady. I own 6 - 7 pairs of shoes and I would like another 6 - 7 more pairs because I have different styles and looks I enjoy presenting myself in. There are also different events I go to where I enjoy being well presented for. I aim to be well presented at all times from head to foot. I learned this from a pastor. He taught be well presented at all times. We will fail to inspire respect from the lady we are meant to have when we fail to present ourselves in a manner deserving respect. Men and women are like diamonds. If they are not cut and polished to express its highest values they will always be underestimated and undervalued. We are responsible, we must present it too.
I've seen women flirt with a man just because their friend or coworker likes the man! It happens all the time, it's like a competition on who can get him. It's like a natural reaction that they can't stop!
They only want you because they see others want you and they have competition.. Once that competition stops they won't want you.. Its like the "cat and the string" anology.... Dangle the string in front of the cat and it will chase it because it thinks it wants it but as soon as you drop the string on the ground and the cat doesn't have to "chase" the string it looses all interest in it and does NOT want it.
Yeah, been there. Once you become attractive to other women expect for those that never gave you the time of the day to suddenly grow an interest in you.
Been there, also with the worse situation when women talk to you to angle you towards another woman in their group. It was worse when I was young and didn’t feel comfortable turning women down. A woman you have a crush on introduces you to a friend that you have nothing in common with other than you are “so nice” to that mutual friend. Now when they introduce that friend. I can say “oh is she really into x types of fitness and healthy living, innovation/DIY/Skoolie living/ green technology, or a medical/military professional (my general topics of conversation, I know I suck at small talk, that's why I learned how to dance...)” also view if she's attractive. If yes cool. If not, “I think I’d prefer getting to know you, let's get dinner on Monday.”
I must disagree with the premise that a man shouldn't ask a woman what she brings to the "table." Men are asked this question all of the time, so why should it be different for a woman? We live in different times, ladies. Feminism and over-exuberant hypergamy have ruined this for everyone. Also, women that play the field until they are 30 have ruined it for themselves. They hit the wall and become desperate, and then it's a free-for-all. I don't like this reality, but it is what it is. Most women these days think that all they need to bring is their lovely selves and it is all good, but that just isn't so. They are basing their own worth solely upon what is in their groin and not about what matters in the long run. Men are not as shallow as women (or girls) think they are. Sure, players will be players, but a decent man that wants a wife, a family, and a solid future with a woman does not look at her like she is just something to pound semen into. She needs skills and a sense of decency. Just knowing what shoes go with which bag are not skills that a man is looking for in his potential bride. Fashion sense can only get you so far. Then what? Is she kind to others? Can she cook? Can she give first aid to a child? Can she balance a budget? Is she diplomatic? Can she show true devotion and express love to her mate without expecting a reward? Does she have a loyal heart? Will she put aside her hypergamous ideations once in the relationship? By the by, I have all of these traits and more, and if a man can have them, then so can a woman.
Comments like this make me so proud. A year ago I’d see no talk of hypergamy and things like this. Now more and more men are waking up and preaching to the boys so they don’t repeat our mistakes. Cannot express how proud it makes me
I agree. These are great questions. Consider a date like the discovery phase. If you ask a woman a straight question, you won't get a straight answer. The trick is to bring up a subject like cooking, and she will tell on her self. Then see if you can get it confirmed later by a friend or relative.
That's exactly right, for the RESPECTABLE woman, not just the sexually attractive woman, looks are important sure but she doesn't have to be a perfect "10". I'd rather take a "7" ANY DAY who has good character and skills than a "10" like a conceited kardashian without money, and the decision wouldn't even be close. In fact, I'd take that aforementioned "7" before a conceited kardashian WITH money!
I think we’ve made approaching women and dating and relationships too complicated. I like how you take the simpler approach Courtney! It’s low pressure and makes things less stressful and more fun, which is how it should be
I agree. Why over-complicate things? It is supposed to be fun. Take care of your appearance. Get some cool clothes that fit you well. Get a proper haircut which suits your face. Eat well and in the right amount, keep in shape and maintain top hygiene, both for yourself and your home. No drugs, no tobacco. If you are going to drink alcohol, keep this to an absolute minimum.
Tv and movies have glamorized these games. Its hard to play along when they keep changing the rules and language. They want guys to be brazen then be feminine so they can be men and lead
Spot on! We are all severely guilty of making dating way more complicated than it needs to be. It should be about having fun meeting someone new, exploring interests, then you work your way to actually wanting a partner. Cheers! 🍻
Thats true. But we can make an unimportant job sound important, or the other way around. My advice is to never lead with your wallet.. Be vague, especially about a job. Show up to coffee date in a used but clean car. Dress well, but not trendy or expensive.. It gives mixed signals. She will have to spend time to make a judgment, as you will.
And So what? I ask the same thing to the woman I am dating, what kind of job she is doing is equally important for me. There's a reason why Asian communities are so successful in western countries it is because both partners are in high profile careers.
When I ask that question, I am genuinely interested in what they do because it gives me clues as to who they are. For example, if they're an executive at a corporation, more than likely I would not fit into their lives, but if they're a caregiver and they love their job, that's a big green flag for me. Someone who works fast food only and lives at home isn't appealing because of a lack of motivation. Someone who works two jobs isn't going to have time for me. The money, over and above taking care of their own needs, is irrelevant.
Only in the most general terms. The danger is that if you over commit too early...before she is ready...then she may drop you. I think it is best not to say ILY before she does, or invite commitment before she asks "where are we going?"
@@chitownbob9714 I disagree with you in terms of who dares to say I love you first. Being a former counter-puncher and always waiting for others to initiate is not a good habit of self- or other- leadership, nes pas?
Marriage is for suckers. Love (the romantic "in love" kind) is a myth. Everyone should grow up and stop buying into these fantasies perpetuated by social constructs rooted in the many oppressions of religion.
*I PRAY THE UNIVERSE GRANT YOUR HEARD ❤ DESIRES WITH MORE LOVE AND COMMITMENT FROM YOUR EX ❤THROUGH THE SAME GREAT MAN OF THE UNIVERSE DR WILSON,, WHO HELPED ME RESTORED MY BROKEN HOME. 🏠HE CAN MAKE YOUR EX BEG FOR A SECOND CHANCE..*
Attraction should be effortless, and just "flow." No go to tricks? That's the one word to describe all of my best dates and relationships with women, friends and even in work/business.
Your shoes are so important when it comes to making first impression - and I agree, women do take notice! And sometimes it’s the first thing they look for - even before they pay attention to your other features. They’re looking to see if you’re wearing the right shoes for the particular occasion, if they’re clean, if they’re not, she’ll immediately think that you’re careless and sloppy - and therefore forming a negative impression of you. Anyway, that’s my two cents. -Carlos Verde - Dating Tips
She will spend hundreds on hair, makeup, nails, clothes, jewelry spray tan… and spend hours putting herself together for that “effortless” attraction to happen.
Dress perfect, have tats , have six figures , be over 6' tall ( I'm 6'4" ) , go to meat markets ( bars / clubs ) which is a disaster, don't be too affectionate or you're a sexist clingy monster , don't be too masculine or you will be too toxic , don't ask any questions or you're too possessive , no hobbies because it would equate to abandonment, etc.. Nothing personal to Courtney Ryan, but getting advice from a woman would be like asking Jesse James how to guard a bank. ( historical Jesse James ). These days pleasing a woman is slim to none, and slim left town.
It's a fine line there's no science to this. What you said is exactly what a girl would rationally say you to as what thy would prefer but then a guy comes out of nowhere with the opposite qualities and he is unique and that gives him a lot more character than her previous "rational" description of her type.
My take on marriage proposals is to just discuss it with your partner instead of looking for “signs or hints”. It’s the same for any other topic important to compatibility between 2 people: just talk and ask about each topic separately.
1. Ignore her words focus on her actions 2. Don’t chase women become the man that women will pursue 3. Women you previously pursued and got rejected by Will later be interested when they see you have a different woman 4. Women think about marriage as a wedding day and not a lifetime supporting and respecting their man 5. Embrace rejection it will make you stronger 6. Disdain women who rejected you, ignoring them is the best revenge 7. The more attractive she is the harder you have to be, DONT SIMP 8. Stay away from single mothers 9. Prioritise your appearance no matter what’s 10. Never fully commit 11. Don’t share your weaknesses with a woman, seek professional help in a serious rut 12. Women cheat more than men, don’t let her accusations blind you 13. Be low tolerance, be ready to walk away at any given moment 14. Don’t be bitter, accept female nature and adjust 15. Keep playing the game and make it difficult. People come back to difficult games to try and beat it, easy games get played once and put on the shelf
My wife basically proposed to me. I was having to transfer in my job to the other end of the country and she said words to the effect of “ I’ll come with you if you marry me”. I’m a great believer in the statement by Rian Stone, “relationships are women’s work”. If you have a strong masculine frame it’s the woman basically asking to enter it, you should never be asking her. She should be the one asking to be exclusive, or starting the “ what are we?” Conversation. That’s how you truly gauge her interest and attraction on whether she’s willing to chase the commitment. Of course, women don’t “like” this. They don’t like being the chaser and of course Courtney thinks a women proposing to a man is wrong. But guess what? If you have enough value women will do all sorts of things they won’t “like” to be with you.
@@mindhunter8772 depends. What’s the timescale? If two weeks, yes. If two years, no. If you are still together 27 years later and she’s followed you all around the world for your work, you’ve put babies in her that are now well adjusted young women studying at top US universities, and she’s still giving you everything you need in the bedroom, then I’d say that you were her Alpha option and have remained so. But maybe her red flags are still to be unearthed……? You tell me, you’re the expert with women clearly.
@@burtonarrieta5671 some men, yes. Most men probably. But then again smart men know that what a woman “likes”, and what turns her on can be two very different things and the worst thing you can do as a guy is worry too much about making a girl “happy”.
The "What do you bring to the table?" question generally follows some probing questions from her about what you do and how much you make. If you are interested in what resources I am bringing in, then I feel justified in asking what you also have to offer. It sometimes feels like men are always on the spot with that question, so it seems only fair to turn the tables, pun intended. I think this is an ending question.....if it isnt going well for some reason, it's a guy deciding whether to reel or cut bait. Men tend to be direct. It's our way. And as far as proposing.......I would be completely turned off. Men do gatekeep relationships. Women control access to sex, men control access to relationships. That has always been the balance of power. Don't usurp our poosition in this. I have to agree with Courtney here.
The question in and of itself exists as a reaction to the checklists that, let's say some, women tend to make for you to be considered attractive to them. So it's sort of a: Ok, you want a guy who's this, this, this , this, this and that, are you the type of woman that such a guy would consider for marriage or LTR? PD: this is a description, not a tacit approval of it's use.
People who are of good character always show, don't tell. If you have to ask, she's probably not able to bring the stuff to the table that you're looking for.
@@Leopar525 What I said. Men control access to relationships. We are the ones that stand the most to lose in a marriage. So that is where we get to be choosy. There's a reason that, traditionally, the man proposes marriage. We don't get to choose when we have sex, but we damned well get to choose if we stand before an altar and make vows or even allow a woman to move in with us. It becomes a question of "What does she bring to my life that I wouldn't have otherwise?" That's the deal.
I would never ask directly (it's just not good etiquette to treat things so transactionally), but whenever I'm getting to know a woman I'm trying to find that out.
Just to say my appreciation for all the good work you've put in over the last year. You're always so fluent with gems of thought on so many aspects of modern relationships. You clearly love what you're doing - it's not a job it's a mission! All the best for the New Year.
Dating and relationships benefit women far more than they do men in 2021 (almost 2022) for a variety of reasons, which is why a lot of men are 1) walking away from relationships and 2) seeking help from a lot of the men's channels that have blown up over these last few years on RUclips because, let's face it, how many women's help channels are there on this platform where women ask "how to get a boyfriend"? There's a reason why there's more men helping men in this area than there is any help for women in this area. Many women want a traditionally masculine man, but God forbid a man wants a traditionally feminine woman. Edit: not trying to come off as a jerk with this comment, just commenting the realities of the whole dating and relationship situation in this day and age. Not a fan of sugarcoating stuff personally. Like the video, Courtney 👌
Social media has made dating so much harder these days. This is because everyone is fake to some degree on social media so it’s hard to really gage who they are. Also it’s made it harder to communicate to people you meet in person because we’ve become programmed to converse in a specific way
Asking what they bring to the table gives them a chance for a lot of things like can she communicate? Is she confident? Does she lie? Etc… not just the literal answer of the question
I love how women tell you to be yourself and then tell you how to dress how to wear your hair how to act how tall to be and how muscular you should be and how much money you should make.
15:00 if a woman can’t take criticism or can’t respect how her actions make me feel even if I respectfully tell them about it she’s not mature enough for a long term relationship. Not about to waste years of my time having to sugar coat a statement or do gymnastics with my words to make something positive. If she’s doing something unpleasant or stupid I’m just gonna have to tell her straight up and she needs to be able to interpret it and accept it as criticism like any adult should, sorry. Obviously if you’re being disrespectful or rude this doesn’t apply.
How to get friendzoned or used for your money 101. Remember gentlemen, tall white Chad can show up in a plain white tee, make her pay, and she’ll be drooling over him, show her group chat pics to make the other girls jealous.
The “table” question is really frustrating. I really don’t know what the benefits of an LTR are. All I ever hear is what men are supposed to do and what women won’t do, e.g. be housewives, stay at home moms, or provide financially for a man. What DO we get?! Ladies act like men are just supposed to know why a marriage/LTR is a good thing.
I recommend really figuring out what you want, so you know what to look for. If it’s easier, figure out what you don’t want and avoid these. Also, identify the qualities that are strengths for you for LTRs so you can showcase those.
You get the girl, while putting in half assed effort. What do you bring to the table? I'll give you a hint. It's not paying for stuff or doing what she says. If you don't feel entitled to women as your birth right, then unfortunately you are stuck having to earn women. And if you think marriage or ltr is not good thing, than why on earth would you do it. Sounds pretty stupid imo.
@@burtonarrieta5671 I should feel entitled to women and put in a half assed effort? I’m asking what the modern woman’s pitch is for marriage. I’m trying to be open minded about the concept. At this point the better option seems to be just dating people causally. I’m not exactly sure wtf any of the other stuff you said had to do with my question.
Some good advice. I kinda dont agree with the part about flirting. To say it's a girl thing because when girls go out they flirt naturally and you as a guy need to figure it out is bad. It relives you (the women/girl) of all responsibility and accountability. You are the one who decided to flirt. Flirting is the act of showing signs of interest to the opposite sex or whoever you are interested in. If you do it for attention or feeling good it's the same as the fuck boys telling you whatever you want to hear just to have sex.
@@FleetAdmiral833 exactly. In the end it's the guys who suver all the consequences. One cute girl flirts with you, you try to approach but she didnt want to. No wonder guys are frustrated and confused. Imagine driving a car, someone uses their right turn sign but suddenly turn left. Where is this appropriate behavior?
@@SquallSZ from my experience some do, some dont. Depends on the situation. Getting the attention of a hot/good looking guy is better than an unattractive guy. The attention of an unattractive guy is better than no attention at all
You’re over thinking things. If a girl flirts with you, just take it for the opportunity it is and have fun with it. Maybe she’s into you, maybe she’s just looking for attention and validation but there is SOME attraction there. Girls don’t flirt with guys they are truly unattracted to. Those guys are invisible to them. So just be ready to engage and see what you can build. What would you prefer? She just ignores you?
@@jleano609 Apart from the opportunity to date her, flirting has no intrinsic value for most men. If a women is going to flirt 'for fun' then she better level up her flirt-radar and make some decent attempt to avoid men who don't like it. Otherwise she's wasting his time and and screwing it for other women as well. But as @Chris Townsend said, just ask and it'll save everyone's time.
Hi Courtney, could invite some males for the next time and maybe they talk about their mistakes in relationships so we singles could avoid or maybe about something different. That would be so interesting
*The key to approaching women who flirt for attention is understanding the difference between genuine interest and playful teasing. If you’re unsure, start with a friendly conversation and gauge her response. If she reciprocates, you’ve got the green light. If not, gracefully move on and leave a positive impression!*
can you imagine how rich a guy has to be to reject a woman because of her shoes?.......women really search for the most ridiculous reasons to reject men......must be amazing to be able to do that...
Yeah it's shallow as s**t but there's weirdo weeaboos out there who reject women (in their minds anyway, not that they'd ever have a chance with any normal women) who don't look like a frickin living anime dolls. We all have shallow stupid reasons for being attracted to people or Not
If a woman wore crocks on a first date, I’m sure you’ll question wtf is going on in her head lol Women are detailed oriented and we notice things. Have you looked into nature and notice the males species are almost always looking brilliant in their appearance bc they have to impress and attract their female counterparts? It’s kind of similar.
8:23 - Courtney, you've seen enough content creators ask women the "table" question and they either stutter, deflect, or flat-out get the answer wrong. Men want peace, femininity, and cooperation from women with respect to LTR and marriage which is clearly not being taught amongst your gender today. So not only is it a fair question, but it's an important question to ask because you and your partner want to be on the same page regarding relationship expectations if you want it to succeed. 8:35 - Us men are not mind readers and women are good at hiding their intentions so again, the "table" question is an important question to ask.
I agree but think it should be done subtly. Asking flat out is in poor taste, just as it would be to ask a friend "what would I get out of being friends with you?"
Phone on a date: That's definitely some good advice for women. Guys do not talk to girls for attention. Woman with tattoos: Red flag. "What do you bring to the table" has to be asked if the woman has a laundry list of what the guy has to bring.
I was debating with a girl about flirting after watching a video. In the video a guy was accused of being unfaithful. His girl hired another girl to "test" him. He is a physical trainer. She said he was flirting with her and other women. The girl I was debating was all about "well he was flirting". I told her everyone flirts. She refused to believe it.
Also that's sort of his job. Same reason waitresses flirt. I'm not saying I think it should be someone's main way they add value to their product, but yes if you are a personal trainer for women, generally you're probably going to have to give them positive praise and maybe flirt depending on if you're ok with that. Again same as a waitress.
11:35 I used this exact line on a girl at the gym once because I thought, "hey Courtney said this was a great opening line to say that worked on her. Let's see if it'll really work!". I said it in the most non-threatening, confident way I could and it still bombed. I got such a tepid response I just left after. It was super disappointing.
I pray for the universe grant your heart desires, Hey friend I got my relationship fixed with the help of a great spiritualist who brought my ex after 3 year of separation ⏭️⏭️
Courtney, I suggest you to bring in a male guest. Why would we want another female on here just validating what you're saying? Bring in a male POV and perspective. It's female nature to protect each other and go against a guy.
Deciding to marry is one of the biggest life changing decisions someone makes, defintely not something you wana do through odd hints, winks & nudges. Damn lol
Marriage is definitely something that requires discussion! Lol I’d hope nobody was going off of hints or winks 😂 flirting before dating and marriage are very different
Any woman who feels offended because a guy at the gym tried to speak to her at the wrong time during her workout or followed her outside to talk to her needs to get over herself. It's not that serious.
Appreciate this video, although I'm so out of the dating game, this is all wasted on me. And if a women disqualifies me because of my shoes, I would gladly never see her again. lol
I'm of the mind of if you are interested, say something, Regardless of gender, Regardless of how you look. Approaching doesn't have to be asking out from the jump. Start a Conversation, show your interest and Hell, I'll ask a woman out if I liked the convo. That's the best way to approach IMO. Stir up and Conversation to get a little bit more comfortable. What I don't like and will not pick up on is if a woman is just eyeing me down from across the room trying to look cute... either say something or say Hi. Where to approach is up to the person... and please be clear with your intentions. I have been approaching that much anymore because I just don't know and getting rejected can become exhausting after a while. IDK, does it feel worth it to ask out 50-100 women just to find 1? and even that 1 is not guaranteed to be right for you? I know this isn't really what the video was all about but I do want to see opinions on this.
I agree with you on that one, I'm only 19, so my experience is near to none. But I've learnt that from the past generation, there wasn't a real chance to date 50-100 of people, it was very much restricted to villages in most cases, in which there would be much more limited options; I find this kinda better in a way, from what I've learnt, nobody is perfect, and with your eventual partner, you're both still learning. Yes there's incompatibility, but I feel like people are much more likely to be compatible if there were less options.
People should not stress out for what is ""suposed to be"" most times when a girl want a guy she herself will be the one asking. That happens to me and my brother (he is a charming person, im a mystery myself). I known everyone want to be happy and on a relationship, everyone is on the same story line. Let me be clear, no "one-thing" is special, nor everything is magical. What works for me is that i already love myself so much to the point of narcissist, so if it comes to dating, a girl is a plus, not a whole life. You people just have to work on yourselves to create a whole world and then invite people in (like girls for example).
@@carlosemiralonso7997 I'm not stressing over "what it's supposed to be" I'm taking it for what it is. It would make things a whole lot easier on both parties to take initiative if interested. It doesn't even have to be asking one out, walk up and talk. Make a conversation. That's all. I meant it more as encouragement.
Personally I wouldn’t approach at the gym, it’s a space where I’m only focused on bettering myself physically and mentally… I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it, but it just seems like people forget what they’re in the gym for.
I like working out at home precisely because there's no one to bother me. I used to go to the gym and the women there were an annoying distraction at best.
Love how you mixed it up with Shaylee as a bloke just getting back into the dating game after 20 years of marriage it's insightful for me to hear what other women think. Have to say Shaylee is seriously beautiful you look at her and think omg you look superb. Great video Courtney love your content.
@@Filthy_Larry Yes, she better marry her current boyfriend or she's going to be facing a very harsh reality in a few years. I think women should be thinking about settling down at 25 at the latest.
The friends one is interesting to me. I was with someone who I cared about very much but she could drink pretty heavily (but not with me mainly with friends). So I was trying to gently persuade her that drinking 5 or 6 nights a week just wasn’t helping but her friends were always pulling her the other way (I’m boring, etc). In the end I gave up and walked away. She was very bitter and angry and called me every name imaginable but I had to do it, just couldn’t cope with it anymore.
with the “what do you bring to the table” dilemma, i know personally if i were to ever ask that question i would only ask to get some specificity about the attributes and intangibles that she carries that could benefit me in particular. i probably wouldn’t ever ask the question bc i would find out anyway but for me personally, it doesn’t have anything to do with whether or not she’s worthy it’s just a matter of if she’s capable of bringing the things i need into our relationship.
Courtney, great content as usual and an interesting Q&A. Shaylee, - my apologies if I misspelled your name - great insight as well. The combined perspective was great and very helpful. Thanks for the content and providing what you do.
I respectfully have to disagree with you about the table question. You can't expect a person to know what a person brings to you in a relationship. Saying that we guys should "just know" what she brings is not beneficial because we don't know you. Besides women ask us men this all the time, as they should. So we should do the same.
I think the idea is that if you've been dating for a while you should be able to figure it out. She should be talking 50 to 80% of the time. She will tell on her self if you are listening.
@@chitownbob9714 If ur dating for a while, her actions will tell you what she does for you and then u decide on what to do. If she is not putting any effort into adding some value to your life and only takes from you, then that says she brings nothing to the table. But I'm talking about when you first get together and u go on a few dates.
This is a period in your life when you should be breaking free from old habits, and becoming much more spontaneous and lively. You can discover new creative abilities and learn to improvise more. This is an excellent time to explore new creative outlets, particularly ones that require greater spontaneity or improvisation. A youthful spirit of freedom and spontaneity is trying to come forth now. However, be wary of a tendency to pursue some area just to be different. Like a youngster who tries smoking cigarettes just to be different and to rebel against his/her parents, you may pursue alternatives simply because they are expressions of being different and rebellious rather than because of their intrinsic worth. Some people experience major unexpected, sudden changes in their lives during this astrological influence, even if they did not plan the changes or consciously initiate them. Be prepared for sudden shifts in your life (moves, job changes, etc.); they will not necessarily occur now, but the probability is higher than usual.
I remember submitting 2 questions to this but i forgot which ones it was haha 😄 I do appreciate the tips on making a great first impression, how to approach and how to dress presentable. I think this advice can apply to women too especially the being on the phone stuff. Hope you had a lovely Christmas and i wish you a blessed upcoming week. Your friend had great insight 😊🙌♥️
@@CourtneyRyan you are totally welcome! You've helped me a ton this year. I'm a much better guy since i found your channel. Yeah Christmas was lovely. I got to see my cousins which i didn't think was gonna happen. I made taco soup for the family. The best part was seeing my grandma. I got some fresh new clothes based on what you recommended in your videos. Thanks for replying 💫
3:57 abusive women hate it when men stick up for themselves. It's crazy how both sides can be so cruel while both sides can be fully independent. What a current state of affairs lol people can't just be people cuz of the crazies making life Hell out there
If you really think you want a "relationship" with the majority of females, all you need to do is find out what their relationship with their father is, and if they avoid that one, just ask them: "what makes for a great father". If she cannot answer that single SIMPLE question, you probably just want to keep things in the "fun" category at best.
Insecure people who lack confidence and self worth will always feel threatened when they see someone who has those things. Even if it's just on a subconscious, unacknowledged level, they will find themselves doing more and more to sabotage that relationship. That's why the manipulation tactics and shaming start to come out when you stand up for yourself. It's a good way to test if she's a confident woman or not, because quality women want to see you stick up for you.
I agree. The problem with the question was the wording. How you say something is, many times, more important than what you're trying to say. Tact matters, and this goes for everyone. It doesn't matter what gender you are.
The reason "be yourself" is often seen as bad advice: If the people asking for advice had a complete sense of self, they wouldn't be seeking advice. A complete self involves a history of experience to draw on. Needing advice means you lack that experience. Better way of wording it: BECOME yourself. Don't rely on tricks. Go out, get hurt, and learn from those experiences, as well as the experiences of others. THEN you can be yourself.
My only issue is with the fact that women are not labelled as creepy when they follow men around stores, pretend to be looking at clothes, all the while they follow the man around. Role reversal, as you two just said in this video, a man that would follow a woman out of the gym is creepy. So how creepy is this woman? Not at all, according to most men and the man in the video (Darius M RUclips channel for the video) it was fine for the woman to do so. So if what she did is not creepy, how is it creepy to do the less creepy thing as a man and ask someone out after they leave the gym?
It's a double standard most of the time because women in general (there are exceptions) are not a physical threat, and most of them are socialized to only give hints and be coy and present themselves to be pursued. Very few will come up and directly express their interest. But creepy is subjective.
I would tend to say when women behave this way it is creepy, but we constantly enforce the idea on men that men simply have to deal with that kind of behavior.
The pairing we deserved, but didn't know we needed. Thanks Courtney and Shay! Especially for clearing up flirting vs. attention vs. interest. That's a hard one, and can the ugly guys like myself in some hot water (you don't want to know.).
When worded properly, the table question is valid and is a qualifying probe. It can be asked in a flirty non confrontational way. Off base on this one.
Flirting just for attention to feel good about themselves rubs me the wrong way, especially when they don't have any real interest in the man, and when it comes to a real relationship or even friendship. Men are guilty of this too. Problems like this often happen at the workplace. True, no one should mistake mere friendliness as an interest in dating. But when a woman hangs around a man constantly, or a man hangs around a woman constantly, it risks enticing the other party into something that isn't really there and that often leads to hard and hurt feelings. Just my opinion.
Your shoes are so important when it comes to making first impression - and I agree, women do take notice! And sometimes it’s the first thing they look for - even before they pay attention to your other features. They’re looking to see if you’re wearing the right shoes for the particular occasion, if they’re clean, if they’re not, she’ll immediately think that you’re careless and sloppy - and therefore forming a negative impression of you. Anyway, that’s my two cents. -Carlos Verde - Dating Tips
It's rare, because NOT only my ex wife asked me if I want a relationship, but a year later proposed to me, I accepted it, and fast forward six and a half years later my divorce was finalized. A man is supposed to step up when it comes to proposals. Period 💯
Just be who you are don’t try change who you are just to impress somebody a real woman will stick by your side through your highs and lows and will love you for who you are it’s all about what’s on the inside that’s true love🙌you can’t impress every women and it’s the same with them too, just be yourself and the right person will never pass you by❤️
Your right about both guys and girls flirting without intention of hooking up with someone because I've done that alot too being a guy then not take the next step in hooking up with the girl too. I also want to point out that interesting point about girls looking at our shoes, I always thought that women notice shoes alot less than the rest of our clothes because they have to look down at our feet.
@@Filthy_Larry You have 200+ comments on her channel alone trolling and spouting hate, I can't imagine who else you harrass online. Nothing else better to do? You clearly have a lot of issues dude, this ain't the way to solve them. I sincerely hope you seek the help you need, that's not a healthy way to live. Take care dude.
This isn't directed at Courtney or her friend. What I found and many other men is that the vast majority of single women will break their rules and requirements for Chad and Tyrone or Pookie and Ray Ray. It's not going to matter how you dress or how well you can hold a conversation or how good your cold approach game is if they are not feeling your sexual energy. Physical touch is the only indicator you need to be concerned about.
A lot of this advice is read the room and I would say that comes with experience so I say, just go for it and fall on your face a few times. You‘ll be a greater person for it
The only way I could have fun with this video is if her and her friend had a pillow fight. Other than that I learn more about human interaction by witness two flies fcking.
Hi Courtney, Love your videos, been binging ever since I found your channel. Please do more videos with black men relating to their style or facial hair. Your videos speak to me and I'm generally curious on how some of these can be applied if you are a person of color. Once again Thank you for you videos 🙂
Ya, at the gym I just dont approach the girls that are really into their workout. Honestly I know they look good but they arent my type, I dont find super fit girls attractive I approach the more feminine ones that look like they're just there to kill time and dont know what theyre doing lol
@@BuryMeInBabylon I mean you’re basically just saying because you hate tattoos on girls, most guys must feel that way. 🤷♂️ My point isn’t to say you have to like tattoos, I’m just saying that you thinking they look ugly isn’t a reason for a girl not to get one if she wants it.
My motto for dating in general...get and stay clean!!!... body & clothes!... you never get a 2nd chance to make a 1st impression!... be yourself...carefully plan your date & be punctual...and everything's in the details with...clothes, 👞 shoes...for the right occasion!...good etiquette, manners & not cussing!... no excessive drinking or reckless driving! Try to not smoke too!... Who wants to lick an ashtray?... Be polite, considerate & never discuss politics, religion or exes! Always follow through if you say you're gonna call her then follow up & do it!... What you say & do should both be congruent! Very good tips, advice & 💡 ideas Court!
The sad thing is the dating scene has gotten so bad that some men feel female robots are a better option.... I know that is becoming BIG thing in Japan... if these become more affordable, and are outfitted with functional.... vaginas..... (as in able to reproduce) dating will just.... die......
Hey Courtnay I am from Germany and I watched some of your Videos and they remind me often of what people I want in my life and what s possble because I haven`t had the best experiences with some things. Sothank you for reminding myself that there can be a better future:)
@@gustavusadolphus1915 They are not, I would say they are normal from my experiences. But the tiktok girls are, most of the time, the same bad as probably all over the world:)
It’s funny how they talk to these guys who are ‘talking to’ multiple women at the same time as if they are the majority 😂. Woman, most of us can’t even get a woman to tolerate us saying hello to them. Never mind dating several!
There are certain manipulative women that will lead a man on by flirting just so they could exploit him for favours. But the good news is that you can usually tell if they're disingenuous or not unless you're extremely socially inept because true body language signals of attraction can't be faked. In terms of cold approaching a girl, it's usually better to explicitly state your intentions from the beginning instead of playing games with pickup lines. It takes a confident man to express his true feelings, especially to a stranger.
When you find love in your heart by dropping the ego you find how heartbreaking it is that people judge your soul's value and worthiness for appreciation on what you wrap your feet in. Pure delusion. These influencers need to do some serious work. Sorry Courtney this isn't it. I know you are trying to help but this is just perpetuating the same broken sht cycle we are all collectively enduring. Missing the point over and over and over again. This life is not about finding a billion false personas to wrap yourself in for superficial validation leaving you feeling empty. It is about finding truth within you and that truth is love it doesn't make since to the ego it never will. It is experienced by dropping the false persona of ego. When you feel the truth of your true essence it will bring you to your knees and then you will understand. Until then no relationship will ever work because if you want love you have to be love. You have to be YOU.
I agree! One topic that most women these days don't want to address falls into the current existential crisis that has led to moral bankruptcy. I can only hypothesize that it's because women want to keep their options open at all times. They sort of want the relationship many employers want with employees - a one way street where the employee is seemingly 100% committed, while the employer reserves the right to 'promote the employee to customer' at any point, with or without cause, and it's purely non negotiable, and you rarely will even get an explanation. From what I've seen out in the field, is that, women can just get "bored" - and the funny thing is on one hand they want "security" but on the other hand, they can become bored of it. As you've mentioned, if there isn't some moral higher calling or something that acts as a moral foundation to the relationship, then the relationship is purely at the whims of the economy, social status, material status, etc. The economy in most developed nations is purely manipulated by influences completely out of people's control, so that "security" she may find attractive can easily disappear overnight. This inevitably rewards the men that don't care, but have a good physic/game, as they'll be able to attract the women that want some excitement, knowing they'll be another beta male to latch onto later on, and that's sort of the cycle these women are going through, bouncing from one guy to another. I live by 2 national parks that I regularly visit to photograph, and while waiting for the light to change and searching for photos, I observe women in relationships, married, single, etc... I've seen it all. I watch them, and I see how they behave, and let me tell you: Things are not good.
@@CourtneyRyan Agreed; but few women these days can pass longterm relationship vetting questions. It's become sort of a one way street, when really, you want to weed out the women whom have some self destructive tendencies early on. Sadly, that's the majority out there, as few have the motivation to posses any introspection and work on any/all attachment issues, family upbringing issues. Invariably they then try to resolve those problems through relationships, and that's where all the problems come up. Now, merely just bringing up questions like: "what makes a strong father?" or "How's your relationship with your father or parents?" = a personal attack, or they ask why you're asking, or they avoid and have no answers. A womans first relationship is with her father, and if that was broken, or non existent, or wasn't a healthy one, and if she's not worked on it, chances are she's proceeded with unhealthy relationships in the past, and she'll sabotage either knowingly or unknowingly a present relationship with a guy who actually may be a great fit for her, but it's "new" and "uncomfortable". I wish this topic was brought up more often. Courtney! There's a great book you should get at the Li Berry (that's the place where they hide all the books!) - "When the past is present" by David Richo. It talks about why people choose the relationships that they do.
Emotional Currency.....that is what I call it. And that goes both ways. Speaks volumes to "Give people the energy that they give you". I try to keep things positive - as you so VERY clearly and consistently demonstrate - so please do not take the term "emotional currency" incorrectly. Its just what I call it. But the concept is (hopefully) clear.
The whole point of finding a woman is *"to start a family together‼"* Most of the ladies on the mark are looking to have fun. Question #1 what do you want out of life? Question #2 where do you see your self in the next 5 years Question #3 what are do doing to achieve those goals? If she fails those questions refuses to answer or bring up your interviewing me. Just walk away unless your looking to have fun.
My girlfriend has perfect skin, not a blemish anywhere. Her skin is like satin. Although she cringes at the thought of tattoos, we have had maybe a couple light conversations about that subject. I know I have told her, any girl can have a tattoo, but not every girl can have perfect skin. Why women think that a tattoo makes them more attractive or desirable is a mystery to me. Most guys, including myself, see tattoos as a red flag.
Thank you. I find it an incredible turn off, but sadly it seems most women these days are tattooed. Put on a pretty dress, a cool bracelet, something short of a permanent marker. There's nothing made by man that is prettier than a woman's body.
I can answer that, most girls are unsure of how to a atract a man (let say this much: a girl atract a lot of guys but none of their tastes). So they mimic what they like on a man: She became tattoo-ed for a tattoo-ed man, became competitive for a competitive man (the list goes on). What they dont realise is that we like whats opposite to us.
@@Filthy_Larry Sorry, but I had to look up tramp stamp and to me they look like doilies on my grandmother's arm chair. Like all tattoos, they age a girl. If you see a girl with a ts, you know she was in her early twenties (or so) around Y2K. Yes, they do make a girl look like she has no discretion and just has to look like every other girl in her group.
🤷 I have no idea why tattoos are a deal breaker for so many men. Many of them are artful and bold. It sounds like a very petty thing to complain about. P.S. But I do NOT take ANYONE seriously, REGARDLESS of gender, that has tattoos on their face, neck, hands, or feet.
I'm sitting here listening to women who are 5 years younger than my youngest daughter giving dating advice. What I like about Courtney is that she has morals and values. If you want to be her man you must be decent. Courtney is a throw back to women of another time. She is not the rule, she is the exception to the rule
Shoes? Buy them, keep them clean, wear them, don’t worry about it. Proposal from a woman? A weak minded guy will probably say yes. What do you bring to the table? If the question upsets you, the answer is obvious. Approaching random women? Don’t bother. Time to stop talking to other women? Never.
A woman should never, ever hint that she is genuinely attracted to a guy, or lie about it because it discourages him from being that confident man they want. It's worth saying twice; hints do not work because if he is nervous he won't pick up on them.
“You can’t go wrong with a body covered in tattoos”. You can’t be serious. Nothing could be farther from the truth from a high-quality man’s perspective. Have you been to a trailer park or biker bar lately? This is not the look men are interested in when considering if a woman is worthy of their commitment.
@@CourtneyRyan Hmmmm. I thought your guest said that she had “lots of them”? She was very attractive and articulate, so it appears she’s at least kept them off her head and neck. Here’s why this attitude and comments are concerning; yesterday (Christmas Day) our son, daughter-in-law, and two granddaughters (10 and 7) came for dinner. The 10 year old is very pretty and becoming body-aware and had a tattoo of some script on her neck. She then showed everyone the tattoo on her upper chest. I asked where she got those and she said they were applications and would disappear in a couple of weeks. Well, that was a relief. Her mother, who has her own “tramp stamp” said it made the daughter look “gangster”. My son works out of town for two weeks at a time and then is only home for a few days. I see the beginnings of a potential downhill slide that can occur in a household of females where the girls are constantly testing boundaries even at this early age. On the other hand, all kids are going to experiment with things and particularly to add some rebellious elements. So, all her grandmother and I can do is provide positive influences where appropriate without stepping out of bounds and respecting the parents responsibilities.
as an introvert flirting without intention is frustration. we value authenticity.
Agreed. Especially if it's a woman that is taken (especially married), it's just extremely uncomfortable. If you're not interested in me, don't flirt with me. It isn't fun, it's stupid.
@@whitemakesright2177 only western (and some not western) girls could learn this ( i am not saying all western girls are the same obviously)
Whenever anyone flirts, its because they are trying to get some emotional need met. S9 when some in a commited relationship flits, its probably because they arent getting their needs met trough their relationship, but that doesnt mean theyre willing to abandon the investment their relationship represents, theyre basically outsourcing.
You can do some flirting back, but just know thats all it is.
I am a man.. And I have to say that I flirt every single day with random or known women.. With absolutely no intention!
yeah seriously haha imagine being invisible for months or even years and then a cute girl starts flirting with you but she doesn't actually think you're attractive and is just talking to you because she's bored. that would crush me.
I agree that the gym is an extreme gray area. I watched a buddy of mine get completely humiliated by this girl at the gym he approached whom he thought was giving him choosing signals by making eye contact and wearing tight colorful clothes. He went over and asked "hey how's your workout going" while she was resting and she completely lost it by making a scene and yelling "why can't I workout just once without a guy bothering me". It got bad to the point nearby guys came over to check on her and a staff member had to ask what happened.
He said that was easily the most embarrassing moment of his life and he'll never do another gym approach again because of it. It scarred him lol.
Pretty rude on her part.
Seems he dodged a bullet, she was nuts man.
and any guy who sees that won't want to approach a girl in the gym either 🙃.
Yikes
Wearing bright clothing? He thinks that's some kind of signal? She's not a bird, she's just wearing gym clothes.
Any girl who looks at my shoes and immediately dismisses me on that account has just done me a huge favor.
I only own 1 pair of shoes. Half the time I'm wearing my work boots. They expect us to be like women and own 15 pairs of shoes.
Wrong my friend. If you were getting married would you still be wearing the same pair of shoes as you would when going to the gym?
If you were taking your lady to a high class restaurant would you wear the one pair of shoes for the gym as for the restaurant?
Owning one pair of shoes says you are prepared for only one event with the lady.
I own 6 - 7 pairs of shoes and I would like another 6 - 7 more pairs because I have different styles and looks I enjoy presenting myself in.
There are also different events I go to where I enjoy being well presented for.
I aim to be well presented at all times from head to foot.
I learned this from a pastor. He taught be well presented at all times.
We will fail to inspire respect from the lady we are meant to have when we fail to present ourselves in a manner deserving respect.
Men and women are like diamonds. If they are not cut and polished to express its highest values they will always be underestimated and undervalued.
We are responsible, we must present it too.
@@returningtoperfection these dudes are must be lazy
seriously wtf ?
to me it is like "if she has more than 10 pairs of shoes, RED FLAGS and 3 purses, that's all huge red flags"!
I've seen women flirt with a man just because their friend or coworker likes the man! It happens all the time, it's like a competition on who can get him. It's like a natural reaction that they can't stop!
They only want you because they see others want you and they have competition.. Once that competition stops they won't want you.. Its like the "cat and the string" anology.... Dangle the string in front of the cat and it will chase it because it thinks it wants it but as soon as you drop the string on the ground and the cat doesn't have to "chase" the string it looses all interest in it and does NOT want it.
Yeah, been there. Once you become attractive to other women expect for those that never gave you the time of the day to suddenly grow an interest in you.
This is why cheaters always win in the dating market. The table is tilted folks
Been there, also with the worse situation when women talk to you to angle you towards another woman in their group.
It was worse when I was young and didn’t feel comfortable turning women down. A woman you have a crush on introduces you to a friend that you have nothing in common with other than you are “so nice” to that mutual friend.
Now when they introduce that friend. I can say “oh is she really into x types of fitness and healthy living, innovation/DIY/Skoolie living/ green technology, or a medical/military professional (my general topics of conversation, I know I suck at small talk, that's why I learned how to dance...)” also view if she's attractive. If yes cool.
If not, “I think I’d prefer getting to know you, let's get dinner on Monday.”
RIDICULOUS
I must disagree with the premise that a man shouldn't ask a woman what she brings to the "table." Men are asked this question all of the time, so why should it be different for a woman? We live in different times, ladies. Feminism and over-exuberant hypergamy have ruined this for everyone. Also, women that play the field until they are 30 have ruined it for themselves. They hit the wall and become desperate, and then it's a free-for-all. I don't like this reality, but it is what it is. Most women these days think that all they need to bring is their lovely selves and it is all good, but that just isn't so. They are basing their own worth solely upon what is in their groin and not about what matters in the long run. Men are not as shallow as women (or girls) think they are. Sure, players will be players, but a decent man that wants a wife, a family, and a solid future with a woman does not look at her like she is just something to pound semen into. She needs skills and a sense of decency. Just knowing what shoes go with which bag are not skills that a man is looking for in his potential bride. Fashion sense can only get you so far. Then what? Is she kind to others? Can she cook? Can she give first aid to a child? Can she balance a budget? Is she diplomatic? Can she show true devotion and express love to her mate without expecting a reward? Does she have a loyal heart? Will she put aside her hypergamous ideations once in the relationship? By the by, I have all of these traits and more, and if a man can have them, then so can a woman.
👏👏👏👏👏👏👏. Exactly well said and spot on. You nailed it.
Comments like this make me so proud. A year ago I’d see no talk of hypergamy and things like this. Now more and more men are waking up and preaching to the boys so they don’t repeat our mistakes. Cannot express how proud it makes me
@@lordofgingers as Gerry Anderson would say "Thunderbirds are Go".
I agree. These are great questions. Consider a date like the discovery phase. If you ask a woman a straight question, you won't get a straight answer. The trick is to bring up a subject like cooking, and she will tell on her self. Then see if you can get it confirmed later by a friend or relative.
That's exactly right, for the RESPECTABLE woman, not just the sexually attractive woman, looks are important sure but she doesn't have to be a perfect "10". I'd rather take a "7" ANY DAY who has good character and skills than a "10" like a conceited kardashian without money, and the decision wouldn't even be close. In fact, I'd take that aforementioned "7" before a conceited kardashian WITH money!
I think we’ve made approaching women and dating and relationships too complicated. I like how you take the simpler approach Courtney! It’s low pressure and makes things less stressful and more fun, which is how it should be
I agree. Why over-complicate things? It is supposed to be fun.
Take care of your appearance. Get some cool clothes that fit you well. Get a proper haircut which suits your face. Eat well and in the right amount, keep in shape and maintain top hygiene, both for yourself and your home. No drugs, no tobacco. If you are going to drink alcohol, keep this to an absolute minimum.
Tv and movies have glamorized these games. Its hard to play along when they keep changing the rules and language. They want guys to be brazen then be feminine so they can be men and lead
🙌🏼
Spot on! We are all severely guilty of making dating way more complicated than it needs to be. It should be about having fun meeting someone new, exploring interests, then you work your way to actually wanting a partner. Cheers! 🍻
We? I think you mean women.
When a woman asks, what do you do for a living? She's asking, what do you bring to the table? Let's not act like we don't know that.
Thats true. But we can make an unimportant job sound important, or the other way around.
My advice is to never lead with your wallet.. Be vague, especially about a job. Show up to coffee date in a used but clean car. Dress well, but not trendy or expensive.. It gives mixed signals. She will have to spend time to make a judgment, as you will.
And So what? I ask the same thing to the woman I am dating, what kind of job she is doing is equally important for me. There's a reason why Asian communities are so successful in western countries it is because both partners are in high profile careers.
@@rahulbhardwaj6552 The point is they're saying most women don't ask, when in fact they do.
exactly that was hypocritical part in this video, cuz accountability is so rare these days, dont date a grown ass child, men and women, plzz
When I ask that question, I am genuinely interested in what they do because it gives me clues as to who they are. For example, if they're an executive at a corporation, more than likely I would not fit into their lives, but if they're a caregiver and they love their job, that's a big green flag for me. Someone who works fast food only and lives at home isn't appealing because of a lack of motivation. Someone who works two jobs isn't going to have time for me. The money, over and above taking care of their own needs, is irrelevant.
To me, marriage should always be discussed. The proposal should be the surprise, not the fact that you wanna marry the other.
Only in the most general terms. The danger is that if you over commit too early...before she is ready...then she may drop you.
I think it is best not to say ILY before she does, or invite commitment before she asks "where are we going?"
@@chitownbob9714 I disagree with you in terms of who dares to say I love you first.
Being a former counter-puncher and always waiting for others to initiate is not a good habit of self- or other- leadership, nes pas?
Marriage is for suckers.
Love (the romantic "in love" kind) is a myth.
Everyone should grow up and stop buying into these fantasies perpetuated by social constructs rooted in the many oppressions of religion.
*I PRAY THE UNIVERSE GRANT YOUR HEARD ❤ DESIRES WITH MORE LOVE AND COMMITMENT FROM YOUR EX ❤THROUGH THE SAME GREAT MAN OF THE UNIVERSE DR WILSON,, WHO HELPED ME RESTORED MY BROKEN HOME. 🏠HE CAN MAKE YOUR EX BEG FOR A SECOND CHANCE..*
✝2348055215168📞☎⏭⏭☎*******??????????????
Attraction should be effortless, and just "flow." No go to tricks? That's the one word to describe all of my best dates and relationships with women, friends and even in work/business.
Agreed!
Your shoes are so important when it comes to making first impression - and I agree, women do take notice!
And sometimes it’s the first thing they look for - even before they pay attention to your other features.
They’re looking to see if you’re wearing the right shoes for the particular occasion, if they’re clean, if they’re not, she’ll immediately think that you’re careless and sloppy - and therefore forming a negative impression of you.
Anyway, that’s my two cents.
-Carlos Verde - Dating Tips
@@carlosverde-datingtips7001 Be sure to wear nice shoes that are clean, I got it.
Exactly, everyone has their own flow too.
She will spend hundreds on hair, makeup, nails, clothes, jewelry spray tan… and spend hours putting herself together for that “effortless” attraction to happen.
Dress perfect, have tats , have six figures , be over 6' tall ( I'm 6'4" ) , go to meat markets ( bars / clubs ) which is a disaster, don't be too affectionate or you're a sexist clingy monster , don't be too masculine or you will be too toxic , don't ask any questions or you're too possessive , no hobbies because it would equate to abandonment, etc.. Nothing personal to Courtney Ryan, but getting advice from a woman would be like asking Jesse James how to guard a bank. ( historical Jesse James ). These days pleasing a woman is slim to none, and slim left town.
And most important of all, be yourself.
yea, these girls are telling us how to act and what to wear. big red flagggg
Dont forget the good ol advice: Just be yourself man!!! (Sarcasm)
@@davidm9442 don't ask a fish how to catch a fish
It's a fine line there's no science to this. What you said is exactly what a girl would rationally say you to as what thy would prefer but then a guy comes out of nowhere with the opposite qualities and he is unique and that gives him a lot more character than her previous "rational" description of her type.
My take on marriage proposals is to just discuss it with your partner instead of looking for “signs or hints”. It’s the same for any other topic important to compatibility between 2 people: just talk and ask about each topic separately.
50 yard line proposals are the stupidest thing ever.
Don’t get married unless she is a virgin boys. With her body count of one it cuts your marriage success rate in half 👈
Agreed!
@@ccpj0eyb319 bro you forgot the /s
1. Ignore her words focus on her actions
2. Don’t chase women become the man that women will pursue
3. Women you previously pursued and got rejected by Will later be interested when they see you have a different woman
4. Women think about marriage as a wedding day and not a lifetime supporting and respecting their man
5. Embrace rejection it will make you stronger
6. Disdain women who rejected you, ignoring them is the best revenge
7. The more attractive she is the harder you have to be, DONT SIMP
8. Stay away from single mothers
9. Prioritise your appearance no matter what’s
10. Never fully commit
11. Don’t share your weaknesses with a woman, seek professional help in a serious rut
12. Women cheat more than men, don’t let her accusations blind you
13. Be low tolerance, be ready to walk away at any given moment
14. Don’t be bitter, accept female nature and adjust
15. Keep playing the game and make it difficult. People come back to difficult games to try and beat it, easy games get played once and put on the shelf
Spot on! Specially in this day and age. Great video nonetheless.
My wife basically proposed to me. I was having to transfer in my job to the other end of the country and she said words to the effect of “ I’ll come with you if you marry me”.
I’m a great believer in the statement by Rian Stone, “relationships are women’s work”. If you have a strong masculine frame it’s the woman basically asking to enter it, you should never be asking her. She should be the one asking to be exclusive, or starting the “ what are we?” Conversation. That’s how you truly gauge her interest and attraction on whether she’s willing to chase the commitment.
Of course, women don’t “like” this. They don’t like being the chaser and of course Courtney thinks a women proposing to a man is wrong. But guess what? If you have enough value women will do all sorts of things they won’t “like” to be with you.
It's a red Flag if she propose first. She's in a hurry....
Like men do all sorts of things that they don't want to.
Zero sum. Someone is always having to compromise.
@@mindhunter8772 depends. What’s the timescale? If two weeks, yes. If two years, no. If you are still together 27 years later and she’s followed you all around the world for your work, you’ve put babies in her that are now well adjusted young women studying at top US universities, and she’s still giving you everything you need in the bedroom, then I’d say that you were her Alpha option and have remained so. But maybe her red flags are still to be unearthed……? You tell me, you’re the expert with women clearly.
@@burtonarrieta5671 some men, yes. Most men probably. But then again smart men know that what a woman “likes”, and what turns her on can be two very different things and the worst thing you can do as a guy is worry too much about making a girl “happy”.
Beta
The "What do you bring to the table?" question generally follows some probing questions from her about what you do and how much you make. If you are interested in what resources I am bringing in, then I feel justified in asking what you also have to offer. It sometimes feels like men are always on the spot with that question, so it seems only fair to turn the tables, pun intended. I think this is an ending question.....if it isnt going well for some reason, it's a guy deciding whether to reel or cut bait. Men tend to be direct. It's our way.
And as far as proposing.......I would be completely turned off. Men do gatekeep relationships. Women control access to sex, men control access to relationships. That has always been the balance of power. Don't usurp our poosition in this. I have to agree with Courtney here.
The question in and of itself exists as a reaction to the checklists that, let's say some, women tend to make for you to be considered attractive to them. So it's sort of a: Ok, you want a guy who's this, this, this , this, this and that, are you the type of woman that such a guy would consider for marriage or LTR?
PD: this is a description, not a tacit approval of it's use.
People who are of good character always show, don't tell.
If you have to ask, she's probably not able to bring the stuff to the table that you're looking for.
What do you mean with gatekeep the relationships?
@@Leopar525 What I said. Men control access to relationships. We are the ones that stand the most to lose in a marriage. So that is where we get to be choosy. There's a reason that, traditionally, the man proposes marriage. We don't get to choose when we have sex, but we damned well get to choose if we stand before an altar and make vows or even allow a woman to move in with us. It becomes a question of "What does she bring to my life that I wouldn't have otherwise?" That's the deal.
I would never ask directly (it's just not good etiquette to treat things so transactionally), but whenever I'm getting to know a woman I'm trying to find that out.
Just to say my appreciation for all the good work you've put in over the last year. You're always so fluent with gems of thought on so many aspects of modern relationships. You clearly love what you're doing - it's not a job it's a mission! All the best for the New Year.
Dating and relationships benefit women far more than they do men in 2021 (almost 2022) for a variety of reasons, which is why a lot of men are 1) walking away from relationships and 2) seeking help from a lot of the men's channels that have blown up over these last few years on RUclips because, let's face it, how many women's help channels are there on this platform where women ask "how to get a boyfriend"? There's a reason why there's more men helping men in this area than there is any help for women in this area. Many women want a traditionally masculine man, but God forbid a man wants a traditionally feminine woman.
Edit: not trying to come off as a jerk with this comment, just commenting the realities of the whole dating and relationship situation in this day and age. Not a fan of sugarcoating stuff personally. Like the video, Courtney 👌
Social media has made dating so much harder these days. This is because everyone is fake to some degree on social media so it’s hard to really gage who they are. Also it’s made it harder to communicate to people you meet in person because we’ve become programmed to converse in a specific way
Asking what they bring to the table gives them a chance for a lot of things like can she communicate? Is she confident? Does she lie? Etc… not just the literal answer of the question
I love how women tell you to be yourself and then tell you how to dress how to wear your hair how to act how tall to be and how muscular you should be and how much money you should make.
I believe in being myself.
What you see is what you get.
I am the prize, not her.
If the way I dress does not suit her, it's her loss not mine
15:00 if a woman can’t take criticism or can’t respect how her actions make me feel even if I respectfully tell them about it she’s not mature enough for a long term relationship. Not about to waste years of my time having to sugar coat a statement or do gymnastics with my words to make something positive. If she’s doing something unpleasant or stupid I’m just gonna have to tell her straight up and she needs to be able to interpret it and accept it as criticism like any adult should, sorry. Obviously if you’re being disrespectful or rude this doesn’t apply.
Carrots always work better than sticks.
@@chitownbob9714 The carrot is the incentive, the stick is the insurance policy.
The problem is women are children generally when taking on feedback. A big red flag.@@chitownbob9714
How to get friendzoned or used for your money 101. Remember gentlemen, tall white Chad can show up in a plain white tee, make her pay, and she’ll be drooling over him, show her group chat pics to make the other girls jealous.
I agree. Human nature rules most of the time.
Exactly lol 😆
Lol 😂 that’s the truth
I love these videos when you have your friends weigh in on opinions. Also you have amazing friends. Happy New Year everyone.
I agree! Courtney and a bunch of her friends providing female insights on anything is great!
Also your a simp
The “table” question is really frustrating. I really don’t know what the benefits of an LTR are. All I ever hear is what men are supposed to do and what women won’t do, e.g. be housewives, stay at home moms, or provide financially for a man. What DO we get?! Ladies act like men are just supposed to know why a marriage/LTR is a good thing.
I recommend really figuring out what you want, so you know what to look for. If it’s easier, figure out what you don’t want and avoid these. Also, identify the qualities that are strengths for you for LTRs so you can showcase those.
Guy: "The table will decide your fate".
Thot: "I am the table".
You get the girl, while putting in half assed effort.
What do you bring to the table? I'll give you a hint. It's not paying for stuff or doing what she says.
If you don't feel entitled to women as your birth right, then unfortunately you are stuck having to earn women.
And if you think marriage or ltr is not good thing, than why on earth would you do it.
Sounds pretty stupid imo.
@@burtonarrieta5671 I should feel entitled to women and put in a half assed effort? I’m asking what the modern woman’s pitch is for marriage. I’m trying to be open minded about the concept. At this point the better option seems to be just dating people causally. I’m not exactly sure wtf any of the other stuff you said had to do with my question.
If a chick is too distracted by a graphic on your tee to hear what you have to say, she's an NPC bro, leave
Some good advice.
I kinda dont agree with the part about flirting. To say it's a girl thing because when girls go out they flirt naturally and you as a guy need to figure it out is bad.
It relives you (the women/girl) of all responsibility and accountability. You are the one who decided to flirt. Flirting is the act of showing signs of interest to the opposite sex or whoever you are interested in. If you do it for attention or feeling good it's the same as the fuck boys telling you whatever you want to hear just to have sex.
I'd also add that if they flirt for "fun", then do they also do that with guys they are not attracted to?
@@FleetAdmiral833 exactly. In the end it's the guys who suver all the consequences.
One cute girl flirts with you, you try to approach but she didnt want to. No wonder guys are frustrated and confused.
Imagine driving a car, someone uses their right turn sign but suddenly turn left. Where is this appropriate behavior?
@@SquallSZ from my experience some do, some dont. Depends on the situation.
Getting the attention of a hot/good looking guy is better than an unattractive guy. The attention of an unattractive guy is better than no attention at all
You’re over thinking things. If a girl flirts with you, just take it for the opportunity it is and have fun with it. Maybe she’s into you, maybe she’s just looking for attention and validation but there is SOME attraction there. Girls don’t flirt with guys they are truly unattracted to. Those guys are invisible to them. So just be ready to engage and see what you can build. What would you prefer? She just ignores you?
@@jleano609 Apart from the opportunity to date her, flirting has no intrinsic value for most men. If a women is going to flirt 'for fun' then she better level up her flirt-radar and make some decent attempt to avoid men who don't like it. Otherwise she's wasting his time and and screwing it for other women as well. But as @Chris Townsend said, just ask and it'll save everyone's time.
Hi Courtney, could invite some males for the next time and maybe they talk about their mistakes in relationships so we singles could avoid or maybe about something different. That would be so interesting
*The key to approaching women who flirt for attention is understanding the difference between genuine interest and playful teasing. If you’re unsure, start with a friendly conversation and gauge her response. If she reciprocates, you’ve got the green light. If not, gracefully move on and leave a positive impression!*
I really enjoyed what was not said🙂.
Nonverbal communication is so awesome.
can you imagine how rich a guy has to be to reject a woman because of her shoes?.......women really search for the most ridiculous reasons to reject men......must be amazing to be able to do that...
If a guy rejects a woman because of shoes that guy is not a man, he is still a boy that hasn’t developed.
@mike smith don’t think you know what beta is. Beta males probably you, judge people based on the shoes they wear. Grow up.
Ikr? Like a man’s shoes is an indicator of him being a good future mate or something. Smh 🤦🏽♂️
Yeah it's shallow as s**t but there's weirdo weeaboos out there who reject women (in their minds anyway, not that they'd ever have a chance with any normal women) who don't look like a frickin living anime dolls.
We all have shallow stupid reasons for being attracted to people or Not
If a woman wore crocks on a first date, I’m sure you’ll question wtf is going on in her head lol Women are detailed oriented and we notice things.
Have you looked into nature and notice the males species are almost always looking brilliant in their appearance bc they have to impress and attract their female counterparts? It’s kind of similar.
8:23 - Courtney, you've seen enough content creators ask women the "table" question and they either stutter, deflect, or flat-out get the answer wrong. Men want peace, femininity, and cooperation from women with respect to LTR and marriage which is clearly not being taught amongst your gender today. So not only is it a fair question, but it's an important question to ask because you and your partner want to be on the same page regarding relationship expectations if you want it to succeed.
8:35 - Us men are not mind readers and women are good at hiding their intentions so again, the "table" question is an important question to ask.
I agree but think it should be done subtly. Asking flat out is in poor taste, just as it would be to ask a friend "what would I get out of being friends with you?"
Phone on a date: That's definitely some good advice for women.
Guys do not talk to girls for attention.
Woman with tattoos: Red flag.
"What do you bring to the table" has to be asked if the woman has a laundry list of what the guy has to bring.
I've never known a classy intelligent woman with tattoos, it's one of the biggest red flags for any bloke.
Im a man with tattoos but a girl can only have a few or none at all.
I was debating with a girl about flirting after watching a video. In the video a guy was accused of being unfaithful. His girl hired another girl to "test" him. He is a physical trainer. She said he was flirting with her and other women. The girl I was debating was all about "well he was flirting". I told her everyone flirts. She refused to believe it.
Also that's sort of his job. Same reason waitresses flirt. I'm not saying I think it should be someone's main way they add value to their product, but yes if you are a personal trainer for women, generally you're probably going to have to give them positive praise and maybe flirt depending on if you're ok with that. Again same as a waitress.
I believe everyone knows by now why men are very reluctant to propose marriage.
What's even the point of marriage in our society now?
…a vampire may only enter a home if invited, then it’s all you’re own fault if you’re bled dry 😉
11:35 I used this exact line on a girl at the gym once because I thought, "hey Courtney said this was a great opening line to say that worked on her. Let's see if it'll really work!". I said it in the most non-threatening, confident way I could and it still bombed. I got such a tepid response I just left after. It was super disappointing.
I pray for the universe grant your heart desires, Hey friend I got my relationship fixed with the help of a great spiritualist who brought my ex after 3 year of separation ⏭️⏭️
Was she giving you looks?
@@chirantanraut Nah but she came over to work out in my area a couple times beside me
Hearing Courtney say "Alpha Chad" is everything 😂
Courtney, I suggest you to bring in a male guest. Why would we want another female on here just validating what you're saying? Bring in a male POV and perspective. It's female nature to protect each other and go against a guy.
It's also human nature for genders to employ something called confirmation bias.
Maybe don’t listen to women at all... this video is about “female” opinion on
Yup!
@@raularmas317 simp
Deciding to marry is one of the biggest life changing decisions someone makes, defintely not something you wana do through odd hints, winks & nudges. Damn lol
Marriage is definitely something that requires discussion! Lol I’d hope nobody was going off of hints or winks 😂 flirting before dating and marriage are very different
Ah ok fair play. My comment is re women proposing marriage first in the relationship. Not about flirting or dating stages.
Any woman who feels offended because a guy at the gym tried to speak to her at the wrong time during her workout or followed her outside to talk to her needs to get over herself. It's not that serious.
This year I’m gonna make it my resolution to hit on as many girls at the gym that I can to expose Karen’s. I’ll put the videos on my channel.
The key is not to wait AT the car, but IN the car.
Trust me that will leave a huge impact on both of you.
🤣
@@VeritasIncrebresco 😉
Appreciate this video, although I'm so out of the dating game, this is all wasted on me. And if a women disqualifies me because of my shoes, I would gladly never see her again. lol
I had no idea shoes were so important, no wonder I've been single all my life.
My Jimmie is too big. Women don’t like big jimmies.
I'm of the mind of if you are interested, say something, Regardless of gender, Regardless of how you look. Approaching doesn't have to be asking out from the jump. Start a Conversation, show your interest and Hell, I'll ask a woman out if I liked the convo. That's the best way to approach IMO. Stir up and Conversation to get a little bit more comfortable. What I don't like and will not pick up on is if a woman is just eyeing me down from across the room trying to look cute... either say something or say Hi. Where to approach is up to the person... and please be clear with your intentions. I have been approaching that much anymore because I just don't know and getting rejected can become exhausting after a while. IDK, does it feel worth it to ask out 50-100 women just to find 1? and even that 1 is not guaranteed to be right for you? I know this isn't really what the video was all about but I do want to see opinions on this.
I agree with you on that one, I'm only 19, so my experience is near to none. But I've learnt that from the past generation, there wasn't a real chance to date 50-100 of people, it was very much restricted to villages in most cases, in which there would be much more limited options; I find this kinda better in a way, from what I've learnt, nobody is perfect, and with your eventual partner, you're both still learning. Yes there's incompatibility, but I feel like people are much more likely to be compatible if there were less options.
People should not stress out for what is ""suposed to be"" most times when a girl want a guy she herself will be the one asking. That happens to me and my brother (he is a charming person, im a mystery myself).
I known everyone want to be happy and on a relationship, everyone is on the same story line.
Let me be clear, no "one-thing" is special, nor everything is magical.
What works for me is that i already love myself so much to the point of narcissist, so if it comes to dating, a girl is a plus, not a whole life.
You people just have to work on yourselves to create a whole world and then invite people in (like girls for example).
@@carlosemiralonso7997 I'm not stressing over "what it's supposed to be" I'm taking it for what it is. It would make things a whole lot easier on both parties to take initiative if interested. It doesn't even have to be asking one out, walk up and talk. Make a conversation. That's all. I meant it more as encouragement.
Personally I wouldn’t approach at the gym, it’s a space where I’m only focused on bettering myself physically and mentally… I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it, but it just seems like people forget what they’re in the gym for.
I like working out at home precisely because there's no one to bother me. I used to go to the gym and the women there were an annoying distraction at best.
Love how you mixed it up with Shaylee as a bloke just getting back into the dating game after 20 years of marriage it's insightful for me to hear what other women think. Have to say Shaylee is seriously beautiful you look at her and think omg you look superb. Great video Courtney love your content.
These ladies are young. Dating at their age is totally different. The older you get, the more difficult it is.
@@briar35981 younger women for us older men is the way to go. Anyway, Courtney is about to hit the wall soon. Just watch.
@@Filthy_Larry Yes, she better marry her current boyfriend or she's going to be facing a very harsh reality in a few years. I think women should be thinking about settling down at 25 at the latest.
@@whitemakesright2177 for real. She’s her own worst enemy as am I.
Men shouldn’t date women over 30 anyway. That’s their use by date.
The friends one is interesting to me. I was with someone who I cared about very much but she could drink pretty heavily (but not with me mainly with friends). So I was trying to gently persuade her that drinking 5 or 6 nights a week just wasn’t helping but her friends were always pulling her the other way (I’m boring, etc). In the end I gave up and walked away. She was very bitter and angry and called me every name imaginable but I had to do it, just couldn’t cope with it anymore.
Good decision IMO.
Same but it wasn't drinking in my situation
with the “what do you bring to the table” dilemma, i know personally if i were to ever ask that question i would only ask to get some specificity about the attributes and intangibles that she carries that could benefit me in particular. i probably wouldn’t ever ask the question bc i would find out anyway but for me personally, it doesn’t have anything to do with whether or not she’s worthy it’s just a matter of if she’s capable of bringing the things i need into our relationship.
Nice to have Shaylee on today. 😊
She’s the best!
Courtney, great content as usual and an interesting Q&A.
Shaylee, - my apologies if I misspelled your name - great insight as well.
The combined perspective was great and very helpful.
Thanks for the content and providing what you do.
I respectfully have to disagree with you about the table question. You can't expect a person to know what a person brings to you in a relationship. Saying that we guys should "just know" what she brings is not beneficial because we don't know you. Besides women ask us men this all the time, as they should. So we should do the same.
I think the idea is that if you've been dating for a while you should be able to figure it out. She should be talking 50 to 80% of the time. She will tell on her self if you are listening.
@@chitownbob9714 If ur dating for a while, her actions will tell you what she does for you and then u decide on what to do. If she is not putting any effort into adding some value to your life and only takes from you, then that says she brings nothing to the table. But I'm talking about when you first get together and u go on a few dates.
This is a period in your life when you should be breaking free from old habits, and becoming much more spontaneous and lively. You can discover new creative abilities and learn to improvise more. This is an excellent time to explore new creative outlets, particularly ones that require greater spontaneity or improvisation. A youthful spirit of freedom and spontaneity is trying to come forth now. However, be wary of a tendency to pursue some area just to be different. Like a youngster who tries smoking cigarettes just to be different and to rebel against his/her parents, you may pursue alternatives simply because they are expressions of being different and rebellious rather than because of their intrinsic worth.
Some people experience major unexpected, sudden changes in their lives during this astrological influence, even if they did not plan the changes or consciously initiate them. Be prepared for sudden shifts in your life (moves, job changes, etc.); they will not necessarily occur now, but the probability is higher than usual.
I remember submitting 2 questions to this but i forgot which ones it was haha 😄 I do appreciate the tips on making a great first impression, how to approach and how to dress presentable. I think this advice can apply to women too especially the being on the phone stuff. Hope you had a lovely Christmas and i wish you a blessed upcoming week. Your friend had great insight 😊🙌♥️
Thank you Georgio! Hope your Christmas was great too 🥰 thanks for all the support and awesome comments this year!
@@CourtneyRyan you are totally welcome! You've helped me a ton this year. I'm a much better guy since i found your channel. Yeah Christmas was lovely. I got to see my cousins which i didn't think was gonna happen. I made taco soup for the family. The best part was seeing my grandma. I got some fresh new clothes based on what you recommended in your videos. Thanks for replying 💫
@@GEORGIOARCADE did she help you become a better simp?
We need an hour Long video of examples of women “sending signals” 😂😂
3:57 abusive women hate it when men stick up for themselves. It's crazy how both sides can be so cruel while both sides can be fully independent. What a current state of affairs lol people can't just be people cuz of the crazies making life Hell out there
If you really think you want a "relationship" with the majority of females, all you need to do is find out what their relationship with their father is, and if they avoid that one, just ask them: "what makes for a great father". If she cannot answer that single SIMPLE question, you probably just want to keep things in the "fun" category at best.
Insecure people who lack confidence and self worth will always feel threatened when they see someone who has those things. Even if it's just on a subconscious, unacknowledged level, they will find themselves doing more and more to sabotage that relationship. That's why the manipulation tactics and shaming start to come out when you stand up for yourself. It's a good way to test if she's a confident woman or not, because quality women want to see you stick up for you.
I agree. The problem with the question was the wording. How you say something is, many times, more important than what you're trying to say. Tact matters, and this goes for everyone. It doesn't matter what gender you are.
Try asking what she values more. Monogamy or romance? That’s a more subtle question that will tell you about the future of this relationship.
So what would be the right answer here with the goal of a long-term relationship?
The reason "be yourself" is often seen as bad advice: If the people asking for advice had a complete sense of self, they wouldn't be seeking advice. A complete self involves a history of experience to draw on. Needing advice means you lack that experience.
Better way of wording it: BECOME yourself. Don't rely on tricks. Go out, get hurt, and learn from those experiences, as well as the experiences of others. THEN you can be yourself.
Buncha nonsense. Go out and get hurt? Stupid advice.
@@SUPREMELEGEND How so?
My only issue is with the fact that women are not labelled as creepy when they follow men around stores, pretend to be looking at clothes, all the while they follow the man around. Role reversal, as you two just said in this video, a man that would follow a woman out of the gym is creepy. So how creepy is this woman? Not at all, according to most men and the man in the video (Darius M RUclips channel for the video) it was fine for the woman to do so. So if what she did is not creepy, how is it creepy to do the less creepy thing as a man and ask someone out after they leave the gym?
Creepy because men following women can easily be some rapist. 🤔
It's a sad double standard. Also, attractive people are not creepy.
It's a double standard most of the time because women in general (there are exceptions) are not a physical threat, and most of them are socialized to only give hints and be coy and present themselves to be pursued. Very few will come up and directly express their interest.
But creepy is subjective.
I would tend to say when women behave this way it is creepy, but we constantly enforce the idea on men that men simply have to deal with that kind of behavior.
The pairing we deserved, but didn't know we needed. Thanks Courtney and Shay! Especially for clearing up flirting vs. attention vs. interest. That's a hard one, and can the ugly guys like myself in some hot water (you don't want to know.).
When worded properly, the table question is valid and is a qualifying probe. It can be asked in a flirty non confrontational way. Off base on this one.
Flirting just for attention to feel good about themselves rubs me the wrong way, especially when they don't have any real interest in the man, and when it comes to a real relationship or even friendship. Men are guilty of this too. Problems like this often happen at the workplace. True, no one should mistake mere friendliness as an interest in dating. But when a woman hangs around a man constantly, or a man hangs around a woman constantly, it risks enticing the other party into something that isn't really there and that often leads to hard and hurt feelings. Just my opinion.
If i ask a girl her life goals and having a family isn't the number 1 or 2 . It's an automatic no.
that should be the case for us guys as well.
@@chepesantacruz777 i partly agree. A man should have life goals to earn enough to provide for that family
Your shoes are so important when it comes to making first impression - and I agree, women do take notice!
And sometimes it’s the first thing they look for - even before they pay attention to your other features.
They’re looking to see if you’re wearing the right shoes for the particular occasion, if they’re clean, if they’re not, she’ll immediately think that you’re careless and sloppy - and therefore forming a negative impression of you.
Anyway, that’s my two cents.
-Carlos Verde - Dating Tips
Merry Christmas Courtney congratulations with everything you did in 2021 great year
I hope 2022 is the last year I have to see any of her videos. She needs to be in prison.
It's rare, because NOT only my ex wife asked me if I want a relationship, but a year later proposed to me, I accepted it, and fast forward six and a half years later my divorce was finalized. A man is supposed to step up when it comes to proposals. Period 💯
Just be who you are don’t try change who you are just to impress somebody a real woman will stick by your side through your highs and lows and will love you for who you are it’s all about what’s on the inside that’s true love🙌you can’t impress every women and it’s the same with them too, just be yourself and the right person will never pass you by❤️
Nope. It doesn't work.
Your right about both guys and girls flirting without intention of hooking up with someone because I've done that alot too being a guy then not take the next step in hooking up with the girl too. I also want to point out that interesting point about girls looking at our shoes, I always thought that women notice shoes alot less than the rest of our clothes because they have to look down at our feet.
Love your content Courtney! Thanks for the super good advice.
Anyone who listens to her advice is a schmuck.
@@Filthy_Larry I just saw your recent comments you've left on her channel, do you need a hug?
@@drednok3569 nah. I love hate.
@@Filthy_Larry You have 200+ comments on her channel alone trolling and spouting hate, I can't imagine who else you harrass online. Nothing else better to do? You clearly have a lot of issues dude, this ain't the way to solve them. I sincerely hope you seek the help you need, that's not a healthy way to live. Take care dude.
@@drednok3569 its a hobby.
This isn't directed at Courtney or her friend. What I found and many other men is that the vast majority of single women will break their rules and requirements for Chad and Tyrone or Pookie and Ray Ray. It's not going to matter how you dress or how well you can hold a conversation or how good your cold approach game is if they are not feeling your sexual energy. Physical touch is the only indicator you need to be concerned about.
Thank you Courtney! You and your friends have helped me so much with the fashion do's and don'ts, especially on the footwear. Love your content!
So glad to hear it! Thanks for being here 🥰
A lot of this advice is read the room and I would say that comes with experience so I say, just go for it and fall on your face a few times. You‘ll be a greater person for it
Hey Court. Love your content
Thank you so much!
Focus on yourself Kingz and be yourself. Ignore the checklist. Time is on your side
I like this. I agree with how Courtney and her friend think these videos are always so much fun
The only way I could have fun with this video is if her and her friend had a pillow fight. Other than that I learn more about human interaction by witness two flies fcking.
@@Filthy_Larry is that right
@@Filthy_Larry and yet your here.. And you've been here before so you must be watching her...
@@dakotafrantz4179 that’s right.
@@Filthy_Larry then why the fuck are you here!??&@#$%\€*£
Hi Courtney, Love your videos, been binging ever since I found your channel. Please do more videos with black men relating to their style or facial hair. Your videos speak to me and I'm generally curious on how some of these can be applied if you are a person of color. Once again Thank you for you videos 🙂
Ya, at the gym I just dont approach the girls that are really into their workout.
Honestly I know they look good but they arent my type, I dont find super fit girls attractive
I approach the more feminine ones that look like they're just there to kill time and dont know what theyre doing lol
Girls like that aproach me, but then run away xDDD
Like I do work out for real, so they turn-off by the smell.
This video broke my heart and brought joy to it at the same time.
Yeah, like a rollercoaster.
Wuss
I was devastated to hear that Shaylee has many tattoos.
Women: just because you find tattoos on men attractive, doesn't mean that we feel the same!!
I feel that way. No need to tell other people what to do with their bodies!
I like girls with tattoos. Don’t assume every guy thinks the same as you 🤷♂️
Most guys hate tattoos on girls and you’re the exception that proves the rule also. I like tattoos isn’t an argument against what he was saying
Tattoos are so ugly on girls
@@BuryMeInBabylon I mean you’re basically just saying because you hate tattoos on girls, most guys must feel that way. 🤷♂️ My point isn’t to say you have to like tattoos, I’m just saying that you thinking they look ugly isn’t a reason for a girl not to get one if she wants it.
My motto for dating in general...get and stay clean!!!... body & clothes!... you never get a 2nd chance to make a 1st impression!... be yourself...carefully plan your date & be punctual...and everything's in the details with...clothes, 👞 shoes...for the right occasion!...good etiquette, manners & not cussing!... no excessive drinking or reckless driving! Try to not smoke too!... Who wants to lick an ashtray?... Be polite, considerate & never discuss politics, religion or exes! Always follow through if you say you're gonna call her then follow up & do it!... What you say & do should both be congruent! Very good tips, advice & 💡 ideas Court!
After i got alex costa video notification
After 10 sec i got yours 😂
Haha thanks for being here! ❤️
Im new to this channel I havent dated in like 5 years and I feel ready to start again and these videos are really helpful
The sad thing is the dating scene has gotten so bad that some men feel female robots are a better option.... I know that is becoming BIG thing in Japan... if these become more affordable, and are outfitted with functional.... vaginas..... (as in able to reproduce) dating will just.... die......
Hey Courtnay I am from Germany and I watched some of your Videos and they remind me often of what people I want in my life and what s possble because I haven`t had the best experiences with some things. Sothank you for reminding myself that there can be a better future:)
Are german women militant feminists like swedish women?
@@gustavusadolphus1915 They are not, I would say they are normal from my experiences. But the tiktok girls are, most of the time, the same bad as probably all over the world:)
I've had 3 different' girls proposed to me, and I said NO! to all of them. I DON'T WANT TO BE LOCK DOWN!
*locked
Fixed that for you.
It’s funny how they talk to these guys who are ‘talking to’ multiple women at the same time as if they are the majority 😂. Woman, most of us can’t even get a woman to tolerate us saying hello to them. Never mind dating several!
Courteney's sweet feminine calming voice is all a man needs to hear. wow
@mike smith lool 🤣
@mike smith
So let's clarify this Mike.
To appreciate valuable feminine traits equates to Beta.
Good luck with your Alpha status.
@mike smith Fair comment
There are certain manipulative women that will lead a man on by flirting just so they could exploit him for favours. But the good news is that you can usually tell if they're disingenuous or not unless you're extremely socially inept because true body language signals of attraction can't be faked. In terms of cold approaching a girl, it's usually better to explicitly state your intentions from the beginning instead of playing games with pickup lines. It takes a confident man to express his true feelings, especially to a stranger.
When you find love in your heart by dropping the ego you find how heartbreaking it is that people judge your soul's value and worthiness for appreciation on what you wrap your feet in. Pure delusion. These influencers need to do some serious work. Sorry Courtney this isn't it. I know you are trying to help but this is just perpetuating the same broken sht cycle we are all collectively enduring. Missing the point over and over and over again. This life is not about finding a billion false personas to wrap yourself in for superficial validation leaving you feeling empty. It is about finding truth within you and that truth is love it doesn't make since to the ego it never will. It is experienced by dropping the false persona of ego. When you feel the truth of your true essence it will bring you to your knees and then you will understand. Until then no relationship will ever work because if you want love you have to be love. You have to be YOU.
I agree! One topic that most women these days don't want to address falls into the current existential crisis that has led to moral bankruptcy. I can only hypothesize that it's because women want to keep their options open at all times. They sort of want the relationship many employers want with employees - a one way street where the employee is seemingly 100% committed, while the employer reserves the right to 'promote the employee to customer' at any point, with or without cause, and it's purely non negotiable, and you rarely will even get an explanation. From what I've seen out in the field, is that, women can just get "bored" - and the funny thing is on one hand they want "security" but on the other hand, they can become bored of it. As you've mentioned, if there isn't some moral higher calling or something that acts as a moral foundation to the relationship, then the relationship is purely at the whims of the economy, social status, material status, etc. The economy in most developed nations is purely manipulated by influences completely out of people's control, so that "security" she may find attractive can easily disappear overnight. This inevitably rewards the men that don't care, but have a good physic/game, as they'll be able to attract the women that want some excitement, knowing they'll be another beta male to latch onto later on, and that's sort of the cycle these women are going through, bouncing from one guy to another. I live by 2 national parks that I regularly visit to photograph, and while waiting for the light to change and searching for photos, I observe women in relationships, married, single, etc... I've seen it all. I watch them, and I see how they behave, and let me tell you: Things are not good.
@@07wrxtr1 Very well said thank you so much for your valuable input.
and the truth will set you free, free to be your true self by being real.
@@grit1679 that’s no saying. That’s a slogan for a shoe store you dummy.
Its 2021 and I think there’s nothing wrong in girls making the first move. I don’t know hows that a big NO from your side?
Girls making the first move is fine, proposing for marriage is a totally different story lol I would never do that but to each their own!
@@CourtneyRyan Agreed; but few women these days can pass longterm relationship vetting questions. It's become sort of a one way street, when really, you want to weed out the women whom have some self destructive tendencies early on. Sadly, that's the majority out there, as few have the motivation to posses any introspection and work on any/all attachment issues, family upbringing issues. Invariably they then try to resolve those problems through relationships, and that's where all the problems come up. Now, merely just bringing up questions like: "what makes a strong father?" or "How's your relationship with your father or parents?" = a personal attack, or they ask why you're asking, or they avoid and have no answers. A womans first relationship is with her father, and if that was broken, or non existent, or wasn't a healthy one, and if she's not worked on it, chances are she's proceeded with unhealthy relationships in the past, and she'll sabotage either knowingly or unknowingly a present relationship with a guy who actually may be a great fit for her, but it's "new" and "uncomfortable". I wish this topic was brought up more often. Courtney! There's a great book you should get at the Li Berry (that's the place where they hide all the books!) - "When the past is present" by David Richo. It talks about why people choose the relationships that they do.
Emotional Currency.....that is what I call it. And that goes both ways. Speaks volumes to "Give people the energy that they give you". I try to keep things positive - as you so VERY clearly and consistently demonstrate - so please do not take the term "emotional currency" incorrectly. Its just what I call it. But the concept is (hopefully) clear.
Be aware, a lot of people who get tattoos are insecure.
You could say that about anything lol some of the most confident people I know have tattoos
Lol
@@CourtneyRyan project confidence not actually being comfortable with their inner self. I agree the more tattoos the lower the self esteem.
Awesome video, Courtney and it's great hearing other women's answers as well.
The whole point of finding a woman is *"to start a family together‼"*
Most of the ladies on the mark are looking to have fun.
Question #1 what do you want out of life?
Question #2 where do you see your self in the next 5 years
Question #3 what are do doing to achieve those goals?
If she fails those questions refuses to answer or bring up your interviewing me. Just walk away unless your looking to have fun.
Courtney's channel is on fire 🔥!
Throw your massive wallet on the floor, then say sorry as you struggle to pick it up
You young girls have more maturity and class than most of the women I'm surrounded by who are in their late 40's and early 50's. 🙄😏
That's because when they get to that age they become bitter and miserable.
My girlfriend has perfect skin, not a blemish anywhere. Her skin is like satin. Although she cringes at the thought of tattoos, we have had maybe a couple light conversations about that subject. I know I have told her, any girl can have a tattoo, but not every girl can have perfect skin. Why women think that a tattoo makes them more attractive or desirable is a mystery to me. Most guys, including myself, see tattoos as a red flag.
Thank you. I find it an incredible turn off, but sadly it seems most women these days are tattooed. Put on a pretty dress, a cool bracelet, something short of a permanent marker. There's nothing made by man that is prettier than a woman's body.
I can answer that, most girls are unsure of how to a atract a man (let say this much: a girl atract a lot of guys but none of their tastes). So they mimic what they like on a man: She became tattoo-ed for a tattoo-ed man, became competitive for a competitive man (the list goes on).
What they dont realise is that we like whats opposite to us.
Over done tattoos is a red flag. I’m a sucker for tramp stamps though. I love tramp stamps.
@@Filthy_Larry Sorry, but I had to look up tramp stamp and to me they look like doilies on my grandmother's arm chair. Like all tattoos, they age a girl. If you see a girl with a ts, you know she was in her early twenties (or so) around Y2K. Yes, they do make a girl look like she has no discretion and just has to look like every other girl in her group.
🤷 I have no idea why tattoos are a deal breaker for so many men.
Many of them are artful and bold.
It sounds like a very petty thing to complain about.
P.S. But I do NOT take ANYONE seriously, REGARDLESS of gender, that has tattoos on their face, neck, hands, or feet.
I'm sitting here listening to women who are 5 years younger than my youngest daughter giving dating advice.
What I like about Courtney is that she has morals and values.
If you want to be her man you must be decent.
Courtney is a throw back to women of another time.
She is not the rule, she is the exception to the rule
You sound like a fool.
Shoes? Buy them, keep them clean, wear them, don’t worry about it. Proposal from a woman? A weak minded guy will probably say yes. What do you bring to the table? If the question upsets you, the answer is obvious. Approaching random women? Don’t bother. Time to stop talking to other women? Never.
Word for word my thoughts. Thanks.
A woman should never, ever hint that she is genuinely attracted to a guy, or lie about it because it discourages him from being that confident man they want. It's worth saying twice; hints do not work because if he is nervous he won't pick up on them.
“You can’t go wrong with a body covered in tattoos”. You can’t be serious. Nothing could be farther from the truth from a high-quality man’s perspective. Have you been to a trailer park or biker bar lately? This is not the look men are interested in when considering if a woman is worthy of their commitment.
We were talking about on a man lol it’s a preference!
@@CourtneyRyan Hmmmm. I thought your guest said that she had “lots of them”? She was very attractive and articulate, so it appears she’s at least kept them off her head and neck. Here’s why this attitude and comments are concerning; yesterday (Christmas Day) our son, daughter-in-law, and two granddaughters (10 and 7) came for dinner. The 10 year old is very pretty and becoming body-aware and had a tattoo of some script on her neck. She then showed everyone the tattoo on her upper chest. I asked where she got those and she said they were applications and would disappear in a couple of weeks. Well, that was a relief. Her mother, who has her own “tramp stamp” said it made the daughter look “gangster”.
My son works out of town for two weeks at a time and then is only home for a few days. I see the beginnings of a potential downhill slide that can occur in a household of females where the girls are constantly testing boundaries even at this early age. On the other hand, all kids are going to experiment with things and particularly to add some rebellious elements. So, all her grandmother and I can do is provide positive influences where appropriate without stepping out of bounds and respecting the parents responsibilities.