How to Stop Feeling Inferior to Others: Overcome Inferiority Complex
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- Опубликовано: 23 июл 2024
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It doesn't feel great to compare yourself to others and feel like you don't measure up. it's also really hard on your self esteem and makes it much more difficult to be comfortable and confident in who you are if you're always thinking you're inferior to others or nothing you do is ever good enough. Here I teach you the key steps to overcome your inferiority complex so you can feel more confident and sure of who you are.
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I am 37. no career. dropped out of college. got married to a good guy with lots of issues.. got pregnant. 3 boys. raised them with severe mental health issues. thank God they are happy. healthy and polite. my parents are both addicts in denial and toxic in so many ways. I lost my only brother. i have anxious attachment issues. I have intense anger. i cut out all my unsupportive family and I am now back in school. I work 2 jobs and I am starting to praise myself everyday. my trauma has held me back and toxic shame is really hard to overcome. I never really compare myself. I'm very attractive. smart and funny. but I get sad when I feel as if other people have things that I want. not jealous. just sad for myself. but I just remain grateful and keep trying and enjoy the simple things in life.
Want to know something interesting Blair? I've got two bachelor's degrees, a master's degree and an working toward a PhD in an engineering field but I feel inferior to you because I have one child and a failed marriage. The flip side is not all it's cracked up to be. I'm rooting for you, sister!
That is part of jealousy if you didn't know.
@@DiamondsRexpensive not really. I'm happy for people and continue to work on myself
@@CareBlair222 Good, that doesn't change the fact that it is still part of jealousy though.
@@MAJ167 this comment, I've searched for my entire life....
Thank you
I hate myself so much that whenever somebody gives me compliments it feels like they are saying it jokingly .
Whenever I get something done or achieve something. I say to that myself I did it because it was easy and anybody could've done that .
Achieving something is a rare occurrence in my life . And somehow whenever I get something done . I don't feel anything. It feels like it doesn't matter and I'm still worthless who hasn't ever accomplished anything.
Same goes for me I have such bad thoughts and feelings about myself that if any one even dares to compliment me I just say thank you so much and leave that place for good becoz I always end up crying after that because I think they are joking about my body and face I am suffering from body dismorphia
@@nikitakumari4600 I can understand. It has progressed so much now that antidepressants and therapy both of them can't keep me sane anymore.
@@lakshyakshitijgautam I feel very sorry for you from the bottom of my heart i wish that you can recover from this as soon as possible and I can assure you that you are so much more than you think you have you're own worth and if you are determined you can accomplish everything you want to my well wishes will always be with you lakshyak 😊
@@nikitakumari4600 Thank you so much for your kind words. I hope you get over from your body dysmorphia and become confident about yourself. :)
@@lakshyakshitijgautam you're most welcome
“Win or learn… use failure as information” = gold!
Yep 100% getting down about it is literally a waste of energy & unproactive
This is the video I needed right now. Lately, I've been tearing myself apart with inferiority complex. I hope this helps you all out there and never forget that you are worthy and more than good enough 🙂
I'm recommending you if you want your ex back
Contact Dr Jude
@@lizzyben7507 I don't want any of them back! 😅
I'm in the same boat.
❤️❤️❤️
Julia I'm new here. I'm glad I found you. I'm 40 years old but I don't feel my path is just like any other 40 year old. Even my younger friends caught up with me and they live their life successfully and the fullest . I understand everyone has struggles in their own journey however how come I take such a long time. I feel so behind . I am a devoted Catholic. I keep praying and I make sure I keep God closer to me. I studied more and involved in church. I even make other people smile. I feed and help the poor . I know I am truly blessed and I'm grateful but I still don't feel like 40 . I don't have a stable job that's why . I know everyone has their own time in the right time
If I can say this…you talk about your life like is a transaction. “Look, I’m a good person, I pray everyday and even make other smile so why my life is not moving forward?”. It sounds like doing all those things automatically should bring you progress in your life. That’s an illusion…Life doesn’t work in that way…if you want something you need to go out there and make it happen. Being a good person is good but not what will make your life “happen”. Decide what you want and work towards it…work on it, praying is helpful but not required.
Thank you speaking about this. I’m starting to realize that my journey is unique, because nobody has my experiences and background. My journey is not always the greatest, but no one else will be able to walk it: that’s what makes it beautiful.
If I could not be me ...I would choose to not be me.
It's a spiritual issue. All the so called mental health issues are spiritual warfare at their core. We don't need pep talks we need Jesus
You’ve done the best with the cards you were dealt with! It’s IMPOSSIBLE to compare to anyone else ! Your life decisions & parents decisions a d their parents lives made all the differences. You can only do your best
@joe, focus on who you want to be & what you want your life to look like & make it happen. What ever reasons you have to not want to be use, life is once so change it. That’s why I try do
Hi Julia!! Shifter here! Oh, this was so good!
Something that I have been working on - I follow fellow artists on social media. Most of them, if not all, are pros and so I can stumble in that comparing my art skills thinking with them. I am inspired by them, and yet, I feel inferior as an artist. But I have been working on that and just focus on what I want to do as artist and what I want to create and that seems to be helping.
Here are my notes:
How to Stop Feeling Inferior to Others: Overcome Inferiority Complex
How does it show up?
• Social media - when we are scrolling and looking at highlight reels and filters.
• End up giving up easily. Don't think you can't do it at all. (perfectionism)
• Nothing that you do is good enough. (All-or-nothing thinking)
• That you hold yourself back in social situations or avoid them altogether.
• If you really find yourself magnifying your shortcomings and minimizing your strengths.
• When you make "never" and "always" statements.
How to Stop feeling inferior and feel better about yourself
• You decide is what is important to you and take intentional steps to achieve that.
• Practice gratitude.
• Challenge that all-or-nothing, mental filters, never or always thinking. Work on distorted thoughts.
• Don't always point out the exceptions (Shortcomings)
• Take a success inventory: make a list of your successes (Maybe 10 successes you had in the past 10 weeks)
• Let yourself fail without making it personal. We either win or we learn. Use failure as information. What can we learn from that experience?
• Learn to unattached from your self-destructive thoughts through mindfulness. (" I noticed I am having the thoughts of…"or " My thoughts are telling me…etc..")
Practice radical self-acceptance (To acknowledge ourselves as perfectly imperfect.)
To those who are reading this, remember always what a worthy and valued person you are. ❤
What’s a “shifter”?
@@jess4951 I am a member of Julia's Shift Society.
You have always been helpful. Thank you Chris!
@@hanisiryani43 Oh thank you for saying that! I am glad I can help! You are very welcome!
This is something that I have struggled with my entire life, feeling lower than everyone else, because of my flaws and personality, thanks for this Julia, I appreciate you my friend ❤️.
You are certainly not alone!
I know that nobody can make me feel inferior -- except myself :(
I have been battling low self-esteem, self-hate, impostor syndrome, irrational perfectionism + procrastination, and the feeling of worthlessness and meaninglessness my whole life. Recently, I deactivated all of my social media... And even isolated myself from friends because I keep hating myself that I am not as successful as them.
Thank you for this video, helped me.. somehow.
This is the wrong approach, isolating yourself from friends to escape your comparative and negative thoughts won't benefit you at all. If you can start being aware and notice how you feel in the moments when the situations unfold, where you compare yourself to others and feel bad, then ask why, you're already well on your way to figure out the whole thing.
I deactivated social media in order to connect better and deeper with people in real life. I want to hear from them in real voice and emotions how their life is and what did they do for fun or generally. I feel much better that way than a picture without a voice.
Hey you're not alone. I'm facing the same problem and doing the same too. I hope we can find some ways out soon.
The timing of this video couldn't have been more perfect. As I've been trying to delve into my social anxiety, I've been trying to identify some of the core beliefs that have contributed to my anxiety and this videos topic is definitely one of them. I've always struggled with comparison so thank you so much for providing a direction!
I'm recommending you if you want your ex back
Hey, I'm Rusty shifting gears;
I struggle with the basis of comparison with who I was, what is expected, and what needs to be done; not necessarily in a sense of someone else.
Feeling inferior is a very real sense of lacking in validation and feeling insecure. That's normal, feeling insecure, the most confident and healthy people I know are insecure, but their fears don't render them useless or a failure, it makes them wise and humble.
Julia Kristina Counciling RUclips channel has been a Godsent and has allowed me the opportunity to grow and expand and better myself truly.
I get to smile and breathe knowing her and her team make life better everyday.
Thank you! This talk on inferiority and the previous talk on shame are essential information. I’m so grateful you shared these.
Thank you for this video. I really needed to hear it right now.
Learnt a lot from it. Thank you so much
Thank you for a greatly supportive video.
Busted! We grow too soon old and too late smart. Thanks for this. I need it.
Always love your videos. I’ve watched so many! Thanks for another great one. ❤️
Thank you for this video! You have been a huge help in my life.
I really like listening to you. You speak of everything I’ve ever struggled with and still do. Thank you
Learning a lot from this one, Julia! Thanks a lot! Enjoy your off-grid experience..,, praying for safety for you and your two kids! Golda
You are such a blessing to me. Thank you so much for being so informational. It seems you just have the message I am in need of.
thanks much for this video!
Use failure as information rather than self rejection!! Wow!!!
I definitely needed this video thank you🙏🏼🌹
Excellent and really resonated with me - I went to a work related social event a couple of days ago and was a bit apprehensive about it but then I did speak out at a small table of strangers (seemingly really self assured and a lot younger than me) and they listened.
I learn here and this why I follow you. I will be more mindful of what else I consume online.
Thank you, Julia Christina! Today's topic resounds with me. I've long felt like a big under-achiever, especially given my educational attainment, my gifts of extensive and diverse knowledge, and my intellectual capabilities.
Thank you for speaking so sincerely and on point 👌 I learned alot from you over the years, I am in a better place now because of you deciding to create this platform for us and for that I say thank you and much appreciation to you💕🤗🤗🤗
Thank you very much Julia.. I wrote down several quotes of what you said and hanged it on my office desk..
I love what you said a lot and it helped me enormously.. and the approach you are using in life is very inspiring❤️
Thank you for this video Julia. This is so me. It's something that my mom taught me and planted in my mind. Here in my adulthood I am learning that each person's life is different and individual. No two people can grow up having the same exact growing experiences in life.
Thank you Julia, I'm John BTW. Found your talk so powerful it brought a tear to my eye. Thank you again for these videos.
Julia, thank you so much for the videos you post. I can't tell you how much this one meant to me. I appreciate your knowledge and experience, and that you share it with the rest of us. You rock. Truly, thank you.❤️
that is 100% my problem.. it doesn’t matter what i do i’m never proud of myself.. i expect myself to be a master at any task i engage in.. every thing u explained describes my thought process to a T
Excellent presentation! You are an amazing teacher! I have this condition of comparison and self condemnation. Everything you suggested is going to be very helpful. Thank you very, very much for sharing your wisdom on this subject!!
Hi Julia!! Your video is so relevant for me- I'm about to begin a new job and inferiority complex is always a problem for me. Trying to detach from my self-destructing thoughts through mindfulness is going to be a tool for me! Being great full for my achievements is also going to help me (finding and watching your video is probably one of my best achievements). I also love the idea of depersonalizing failures and use failure as information. As always I liked the video- thanks!❤❤
I’m Joey , I recently discovered this is why I’ve been feeling so down all the time, so I’m excited to fix my problems
❤️❤️❤️❤️
My name is Carisa! I'm a real estate agent and a health coach! My inferiority complex sometimes effects my ability to socialize ... thanks for the video!
Wonderful tone and content
Absolutely brilliant... I really benefited from listening to this. Thank you thank you thank you. I listen to your videos and always am encouraged, inspired and emotionally comforted, just what the doctor ordered... I always have to share your talks with friends... God bless you 🙏🏽
If one is inferior and knows it, there is no harm in feeling inferior. That happens to be my situation. By realizing my inferiority to others, I have saved a lt of mental anguish, stress, and time. I would not wish myself on any body.
Just this morning..
Again Julia, you bring these videos at exactly the right time.
Yes I used to do the same thing after getting together. Social hang over. Pick me apart.
As early as yesterday, I had created a list of 11 significant failures of my life which dealt me some crushing blows. I think I needed to see this list to understand why I feel so bad. But I also know I need to be grateful for the good things, so thanks for suggesting that.
Thank you for this Julia! I have been doing this for a while now... with my ex and his group, with my friends. I always look at them with envy because of their status and money. Like they all have it easy when socializing with everyone else and all I do is fail without even trying. I try to be social but it always backfires! I am so tired of trying to be someone I'm not so I just wanted to be myself.
Love this vid. I can relate I have Avoidant personality disorder. These are part of my deal
It's so good to know we're not alone. I really appreciate and get a lot from these videos! This seems like a fantastic, supportive community. It seems hard sometimes these days to have a place where people build each other up and not judge. I just want everyone here to know that you are an amazing person and hope your day/week/month/year/life is filled with grace and growth.
Another really informative and interesting video. Thanks! (edit) I think there are some people who use an inferiority complex to gain attention and even some degree of validation from friends and family. It's their way of not quite being invisible to others.
I love your all videos, I always look forward for upcoming videos. This video made my day and your words gave me so much strength because I always felt I am not good enough even I know my journey is completely different
I definitely struggle with this and have since I was a young child. We will always lose to someone in the comparison game. Someone is always smarter, better looking, a better athlete, cooler, more hip, maybe even more talented in an area where we have a little talent. I am going to think more about my strengths and how the good qualities I have impact others. Just being who I am made to be without apologies. Thanks so much for these videos. I am really glad I found you and this channel. It really does help.
Hi Julia Kristina
70yo Grannie from South Australia here.
I regularly watch your content. You're brilliant!
Even at my age I'm still learning about these things. Many mistakes down the road, but I can still learn important lessons from you.
Also, you're a great resource for other family members when the time seems right.
Thankyou so much. I really appreciate your input into my life and that of my family.
So long as things continue this way I'm never going to stop feeling inferior.
Have you been reading my journals???!! 🤣… so much resonates with me… thank you for sharing.
Love your videos!
Hi, I’m new here and I wish I had all this information before … thank you so much.
Phenomenal video Julia Kristina 🙏❤
It's not something that I like to talk about but I come from a very abusive family. A family that does not include me. I have accomplished a lot as a single mom. And this video has really helped me to see myself as a good person that has accomplished a lot. And because I've gone through hardships it doesn't define me. I woke up to this video. I really needed it in my life. And I have nothing but Love and appreciation for you. Thank you!
You totally explained how I have always felt about myself.
All my life i felt that i wasn't good enough for being hsp and an empath and diffrenet from others .i felt ashamed of it .
Perfection... Thank you thank you
😍😍😍👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 thank you for this video!
Thank you. 😊 You are delightful!
The R.A. S. filter seems automaticly set to hinder our ability to notice our personal merit and abilities, even though we can set our R.A.S consciously.
Oh my gosh!! The leaving the social situation and then bam the thoughts start raining down!! 😩
Great points 😊
Thanks for theses talks
Hi!! This is such a great topic! I lost both my parents as a teenager and I am stuck between thinking I am the greatest person in the world and feeling like I am a total useless piece of crap. I tend to stay alone A LOT because thats where I am great. People don’t make me feel good. And I totally stay off social media. 🤮😂
I feel you on this
Oh honey iam so sorry for your loss I hope that you are okay you seem and sound like a strong brave woman stay blessed honey
What pops out for me. I am not alone in this feeling. When I have magnified my shortcomings and minimized my achievements, or at least don't think about my achievements. At time I have felt nothing is good enough, or I think nothing is good enough when it comes to families/friends etc. Sure loved this clip
You are always good enough.
I feel inferior because my father molested me . He obviously thought that I was inferior too.
Im 58 and can’t get over it.
I’m sorry to hear that. Sending you light and love
@tessa ❤️ it’s lies , he’s lies! Don’t believe them, that’s his narrative- don’t let it be yours
I am so grateful to have found you and your wonderfully helpful videos- I love your sense of humor and the fact that you break things down to easily digested orts of information- THANK YOU!
I've been brutally abusive in my words I've heard myself say outloud when I'm frustrated. 😢,I wouldn't talk to anyone like that..I've never felt freedom
Motivational videos are a great readymade quickstart to boost productivity...
I struggle with comparing myself to people who "did a better job than me." Another way this shows up is if we are in school or at work our teacher or employer praise one person more than another or this idea of favoritism. I love the "it's either we win, or we learn."
powerful video
I’m in tears because that’s how I am
Sending you love ❤️
you are very intelligent. thank you. ❤
Great video
Thank you so much
Needed this. Have you ever considered putting the audio tracks of this into podcast format?
Thank you ❤️
Just Julie here again ... This is me ,... I always think that Iam not good enough .... I Have got used to feeling like this . I think Iam doing good , but I look around and see others really getting along with life .
Thank you. Very much.
Thank u so much
Thank you. 🦋🙂💕
This would've been helpful years ago when I first got active on social media. But hey! You gotta learn somehow!
Thank you xx
Thanks Julia
Perfectly imperfect.
Yesssss, I'm just assuming people think I'm awkward!!!
blerg! I do this a lot - but it's been pretty bad lately bc I've been in a shame pit the last few years while dealing w/ some identity stuff. Interesting how it all goes hand in hand.
I feel like nothing I do is good enough Julia sometimes.
Thank You
I feel like that often…like nothing I do is good enough. I always find “the problem”. Some say I’m a big achiever but honestly i don’t see it…my eyes focus on those things I have not achieved or done, truly exhausting. I am aware of the process and that helps but a life time of putting yourself down is difficult to challenge but I have been trying. I challenge my own process, focus on the good things and just stopping for a minute in the morning, before my day starts just to appreciate the good things I have.
Hey I like how you mentioned Brian Tracey I recently started watching and
I actually have researched the word in a dictionary book (accident-prone). 🤔💌 Very interesting
Hello Mam,
Thanks for this wonderful video
I can see exact replica of me throughout😢😢.
I even lost my partner bcz of this.
Hope one day I will overcome this
I have fought this problem for all my life. Trying to learn I'm worth something because I exist versus having worth because others find me acceptable. But for 54 years I spent my life trying to prove myself worth something never succeeding. Thus have try end my life because I could not see myself having any worth and no one loved or liked me.
You’re Goooooood 🙂
I was raised in a well to do German neighborhood in the 1960s. I never felt inferior yet others did as that is why they bullied abused and harassed me. I chose education, fitness and health. Others had poor choices and it showed back then and even now (in 2022). Folks are envious and jealous of others and their immaturity from their dysfunctional childhood is displayed in their behavior action and word
I love you thanks for your help today and tomorrow because you are too sweetie I am aware of who you are beautiful and I love you too keep influencing the masses and I just had to know what you think
Mam you are reading my life as an open book😳
I have never felt good enough ever,even after 4 kids, now its I'm not a good mom...and its constant in my head
I'm really working on, as an adult, losing the mindset in social settings that I'm the child & they're the adult. I still feel like I'm being lectured by my parents even if they're only a few years older than myself
Thank you for your videos. They are helping me. I am searching for a therapist because I’m very sad. My husband passed away a few months ago.
I need to have an attitude of gratitude...