How to pretend You're Married for F**king Idiots.
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- Опубликовано: 4 окт 2024
- From the New York Bestselling author of 'How to Pretend to Lose Weight' and 'How to Change the Narrative', this audiobook, recorded by Some Posh Bird, gives you step by step instructions on how to 'successfully' convince anyone that you are, indeed, married and in a loving and supportive relationship.
*results may vary.
Salah seems to be increasingly M.I.A. lately. He seemingly only shows up to play the same three songs (terribly) on keyboard at the end of her streams. Otherwise, he (or someone using his account) shows up in chat just to ruin the vibe and block ppl. Once this farce ends, Smugtal will finally tell the truth that we've been screaming all along.
Exactly, & it seems the only time it's really Salah behind his account is when he's bragging on himself or telling Chantal what a "fat" "freak of nature" she is......
But that's her guyyyyyy!!
Yes. Final stage of the book...
You mean the paragraphs in PERFECT English aren't him?? 🤣
I’ll be honest, the theory that Someone is pretending to be Salah in chat has me skeptical.. I always thought it was weird that he was a mod, and his English in Chat is suspicious considering how broken it appears out of chat. But I also think whoever is pretending to be him has to coordinate with him in some capacity so he’s not actively posting in chat while also playing keyboard..
it’s also SUPER suspicious that he threw a tantrum in chat and vowed to never come back, but is perfectly happy playing Crazy frog for the same group of people like nothing happened.. but Salah also came back to chat with “Chantal is my sweet cake” comment” which also sounded overtly sexual?
I’m not sure if him leaving was ever resolved or if Chantal just reappeared in Kuwait and everyone just stopped caring because we started a new cycle of healthy eating and lifestyle changes…
I don't think she'll ever tell the truth. She will go to her grave swearing he loves her. Her ego won't allow otherwise
Take Note: When preparing to take the "wedding photo", ask the "groom" to not arrive wearing an old hoodie and dirty sneakers. Showing the world he puts more thought into what he wears for a dinner at "Applebee's" then his own wedding, could cause speculation.
That's a good point
Absolutely! If I was Chantal I would have been FUMING! 😂😂
Ohh you are clever! This is gold. Well done PhatCow!
You don’t have to mention him by name. 💀. Most handsomest huzzzzzzband.
So good!! Hopefully Foodie sees this and fumes.
You're so funny & on point. I look forward to your videos. Keep up the good work.😊✌️🌻🌻
Thank you
She found her character for her make believe perfect marriage… Sweet love baaabbbe handsomest Huzzband 😂
This was great! Your voice is perfect for this. Please consider reading some bed time stories for us chronic insomniacs. Bonus points if they're a little sweary. 💜💙
I think I've already begged this amazing soul with a soothing voice to do some ASMR.. LoL..
She would be amazing at it!!
That was my version of Foodies low BMI voice!!!!
@@PhatCowChronicles you would be a great voice over actor, or a therapist, phycologist, private investigator, politician, etc. I think you are fabulous and kind.
Haha FB must have studied the same article 🤣
LMAO! Perfection! You know it’s terribly funny how although Salah family is living nearby Chantal never invites them over nor does she ever do holidays or celebrations together with them not to mention they weren’t at their own son, brother nephew’s wedding! Not one family portrait or deceased mother’s photo is displayed in their apartment. Very strange! 🤔🤔🤔🤔
She was probably told it was cultural.
@@PhatCowChronicles Although, in reality, this directly contradicts the ME culture of close family ties. But Chantal usually knows better and believes what she wants to believe.
She doesn't even have a phone number in case of emergency
And let's not forget it helps to move half way around the world and not have any friends or family who give a damn. LOL. Great work as always!
That gumball machine grade ring she puts on when she feels like it is all I need to know how fake that relationsip is.
Isn't that thing gawd awful? I think that was the only ring that fit her. She mentioned it's a size 11 or 12. The average size for a woman is 6 -7. You know she was in a big hurry and wanted a ring NOW. Jewelers can't take a size 7 ring and make it into an 11, they would have had to custom make it and she's too impulsive and impatient. She bought the first thing that fit.
The real telling thing is that she has NO interaction with his family. Now, I can't stand my inlaws, but I know who they are, where they live, etc, and I occasionally have interactions with them as obligations dictate. I have their phone numbers and they have mine. *shiver* Yeah, my husband is adopted, but that's not the point. If Chantal were really married she would be able to contact her inlaws even if it would be no fun.
I did not like my MIL at all...
Absolutely! I live with my spouse, and I know all his people on both sides, and his ex and kids.
This!! My husband is pretty much no-contact with his parents but I still know how to reach them in an emergency!
@@PhatCowChronicles I was blessed with a great MIL. Unfortunately I did not appreciate how grand a woman she was until she passed away. I tell her now in my prayers.
Especially if you think your spouse is missing. I'd call Satan himself to find my partner.
This is absolutely spot on...🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉
You’re so creative and funny! Love the content 💜
Slow down! I'm taking notes!!! 🤣🤣🤣
brilliant and factual to the tiniest detail......
🎶Handsomest man handsomest man🎶
Thank goodness! The How-To guide that's been missing from my life! 😂
Fantastic. I really enjoy your channel 👏😀
This is the best yet! Hysterical! 😂😂😂 The style and speech reminds me of work training videos I used to sleep through 😂😂
I was going for a power point presentation when power point was popular with bonus elevator music.
@@PhatCowChronicles Brilliant! 🤩
So true!! Love your content 🎉❤
😂😂😂 Chantal should watch and take some notes 😊
Omg that was fantastic!!!!!
Im not convinced that Foodie knows shes in a fake marriage. Is it possible She knows the marriage is fake, but believes the relationship is real? She appears to truly believe they are in a relationship, and shes not a good actress, so... All i know for sure is that we don't have all the pieces and won't until its over and she exposes it all as she always does!!
It could be, but she watches everything the reaction channels say about her, especially this one that made it very clear that she could've been scammed by him at the courthouse. We know she watched it because she responded within days. She has no excuse now. She is so desperate for love and to be right that she will lie until this farce crashes and burns in dramatic fashion, and then she'll have more content to revive her channel when she goes back to Canada. She's gonna need it!
Your channel is getting better and better! I can’t wait to see your numbers rise ❤
Remember when she said she would never be with someone not physical with her? 😂
Yeah. But when you're physically unable to be physical with someone maybe it changes?
Yep or someone with a teenie winkie! 😂😂
You mean pats on the head and cheek pinches aren't physical intimacy?
Well done well done !!
Greetings.. It has become evident you are a accomplished author/writer/presenter and I very much enjoy your material and reading voice.. So I will bring this to your attention with love.. I found 2 "typos". 1:45 somewhere (to) live.. "to" is missing. 2:22 "oversees".. instead of "overseas".. I only wanted to share that with you because I know that's your world. proofreading writing etc.. I thoroughly enjoy your videos and always look forward to seeing them.
It's so much easier to proofread other people's stuff, i become 'mistake blind' when it comes to mine. Thanks for the heads-up.
@@PhatCowChronicles yes I am guilty of many infractions in my comments etc... lol. but its fun to find the little gems nobody notices... those typos were subtle and very easy to not see in real time.. Have a great day and I will see you on your next upload. Side-note I appreciate your maturity as when bringing such info to younger creators I find they take this kind of interaction as very negative and immediately go into defensive mode and shut down in anger.. In one of these exchanges I countered with wait till you get older, and the person and their followers could not for the life of them understand what that meant ..lol.
@@storytimewithunclekumaran5004 I should l hope by now, at my age, I can tell when people are just trying to be helpful and when they are being arses.
@@PhatCowChronicles lolz
Another winner! You keep on doing you, bestie.
Thanks for the tips! I'm going to go set my Tinder profile to "International" now!
@@steadyc9277 lol happy hunting! 😂
soon to be on the Best Seller list!
How did we ever live without this handy dandy guide? You are a lifesaver madam 😝
This gave me a good laugh😂. Movie stars do it all the time right, but then again they are actors. FB and Salah are terrible actors
LOVE YOUR CONTENT! THANK YOU❤
Thank you so very much
i love your videos.
You never quite grasp just how much Chantal did half the work for the scammers thanks to her delusions of wanting to be highly desired.
i really like her video today, where she had expressed that he would take pics, video of weighing her…but he couldn’t be bothered to be there today!🤣🤣🤣👀
Great! Now all I like to know is how to pretend to get a fake divorce ending the fake marriage. 😹
Yes indeed, a fake marriage must end in a fake divorce!
Imho, this is til death do us part
@@Ophelia1023 In this case it's very possible. 😺
I was waiting for it when poop hit the fan when she found out about Kaibella in Dec? last year in Canada but she went back to Kuwait of course.
It all depends how much hurry Poopy is in, what happens first, I guess.
@@somjasa If he can get another desperate cash cow it's bye bye Cutie
@@Ophelia1023 Yup, for sure!😺
Chantal missed a great opportunity to fawn over Salah for his birthday, what says loving couple more than making a fuss over someone’s birthday?
I think She just didn’t care that much and couldn’t be bothered.. it’s weird she doesn’t know him well enough to buy him a gift, and even if they didn’t have cake, she could have made him a nice dinner, or they could have gone out to eat. She could have even made him a hand made card or ordered some balloons..
and even though it’s not cultural for Salah, it sounds like he doesn’t live close to family, and having someone make him feel loved and special sounds like it could have been very meaningful.. I know he’s a romance scammer, but Chantal’s the one claiming to be madly in love with the man!
It’s like, now that Chantal has someone to call her husband, she doesn’t care about the relationship. She didn’t put much care into her relationship with Bibi or Peetz, but she was buying Nader iPads, paying his rent, and looking into buying a cabin just to get him to admit they were dating..
I’m not even married to Salah and I could guess the guy would appreciate going shopping for some new clothes, maybe a stop at the barber for a fresh cut, maybe send him off to hang with the boys at a hookah lounge!
When they were living in the second crappy apartment, she was doing a “tour.” She showed the desk with the gaming computer and this little organizer on it where they kept the car keys. But the weird part was that she said that’s where they kept their wedding rings so they could put them in or off as they came in or went out. I thought that was so strange. Who does that? It’s been clear from the beginning that this was an act. I think she “hired” him for her channel. She had tried to hire Nader and then started getting more and more fake and calling her videos, shows.
I know you’re talking about foodie beauty here, but it also sounds like Alexandra Rodriguez’s marriage.
I haven't heard that name in a long time I didn't even know she was still on the internet
That woman is among the most annoying ever. I feel bad for her poor baby.
@@Ophelia1023 she had a baby like I said I haven't heard anything about her in ages
@@debbimeyersbrant5752 Lucky you, you missed the obnoxious pregnancy
@@Ophelia1023 please don't tell me she played it to the hill everything that could go wrong went wrong
Omg the title 😂
💖💖💖💖💖💖
🌞💜
I am old but not quite with hearing aids yet. I have my laptop all the way up and all I hear are hard S's and mumbles. I will revisit when I get a hearing device or earphones. Sounds as though you are whispering.
I'm so sorry. I was trying to mimic Foodies low BMI way of talking.
I also have hearing problems so I switch on the subtitles then it is perfect and I both read and hear
@@sandrastevens411 Great idea!
@@PhatCowChronicles It is not your fault dear. It is time I do something on my end!
Epic 😂😂😂❤❤💍💍💍💍💍🔔🔔🔔😅
OMG! 😂😂😅
😂😂😂
You hit every point squarely on the nose!
I can't stand it when she says "Salah", pauses and then continues with "my husband". As if we don't know her fake huzzband is Scatty! 🙄
Not skipping ads on your videos as a thank you x you’re so well spoken and educated! 🩷
That's the sweetest thing...but don't suffer the ads unnecessarily.