The Strength In Walking Away
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- Опубликовано: 20 сен 2024
- One of the scariest & often most difficult things you can do when it comes to women is to walk away when she's not giving you what you want & deserve. On the other hand, there's also a lot of power & strength in walking away, & sometimes it can actually get you what you want.
In this Attraction Tips video I'm going to be discussing the power of walking away & how it actually takes strength, & often a lot of it, to walk away, & how it's actually weakness to cave-in & accept her wants & demands, abuse, & disrespect.
#WalkingAway #BreakUps #RelationhipNegotiation #disrespect
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The greatest negotiation position is being able to walk away and mean it
Cory Wayne 👍🏿
Exactly!
Corey Wayne
Corey Wayne quoted it from a former Navy Seal
Yessssssss!!!!!!! and this goes for business and effective negotiation in sales!
I always walk away. I actually find it to be the best option. My ex decided she wanted to see another guy and at that moment I told her I’m done and walked away and never contacted her. Seven months later she reached out I ignored then again I ignored then she created a fake profile and wrote me and I fell for it and after 4 days she told me it was her. I walked away again and within three years she tried contacting me 11 times. Trust is a hard thing to give back once it was abused
That's great that you had the strength to walk away...most men do not.
@@SkillofAttraction I didn’t know that. Maybe low self worth? I’m just about to walk away again unfortunately but I really have no other options. Thank again Erik.
She should come back within a week. Why would you get her back after she has been sleeping around?
Stuff like that means she doesn't respect you as a man! My ex does that stuff. Just have to focus on yourself 💯
update?
because im doing the same thing with my wife and she hold on for 5 days max
I quietly walked away recently from a toxic girl in mid-Nov. I had no idea I had the inner strength to do so until some introspection made me realize that the experience of my mom passing away after a short but painful battle w/ Lymphoma gave me the necessary strength. Today as I approach the New Year I'm so glad I did. To the guys & girls reading this: you can do this! I won't deny that it'll be painful at first but it gets better as you start to focus and appreciate on your peace of mind. Walking away is NOT a sign weakness but a sign of maturity & fortitude.
Exactly. It's difficult & painful to walk away, but if she's not a good person & treats you with disrespect, you're doing yourself a favor. It takes a lot of strength to do this...especially if you don't currently have options.
You are amazing.walking away from a woman ignoring me was the best decision I ever took.
Absolutely! It's difficult initially when you really like/love her, but it's always for the best. Plus, sometimes those women begin chasing after you once you walk away. Just make sure they EARN it if you decide to give them another chance.
'"JUST WALK AWAY IF YOU DON'T DESERVE TO STAY"
Period!!!!!!
Yes, but the point of this video is that many people believe it's weakness to walk away...when it actually takes a lot of strength.
This is such an important topic. Waking away is simply you enforcing your boundaries and having boundaries is what separate the secure alpha with the insecure beta. Boundaries must be enforce at all cost, and walking away is the ultimate (and sometimes the only) way to enforce those boundaries.
Excellent video my man. I follow you and Corey Wayne and your way of communicating these topics is clear and succinct.
Thanks, man! Much appreciated! And yes, you're on point...always enforce healthy boundaries.
I recently did this to a Gal I was casually seeing. I think I over pursued Her which gradually lowered Her attractions. She’s already tried to put me in Friend zone but told Her I’m not interested. When I did that, oh damn She invited me to hang out. We made out and got really physical. I started to over pursue again, and of course She threw the let’s be Friends speech. I just walked away, kind of just got fed up with Her antics. It’s been 2 weeks of No Contact and I’m perfectly find without Her. Feels sooo damn good to walk away
Yes, when you stand up to them & almost push them away, they can't help but to chase after you...it turns them on in a way...but only IF they have some feelings of attraction for you. I once flipped this around & friend-zoned a girlfriend after she had been getting on my nerves for a while & we were becoming distant. She first agreed that we'd be better off as just friends...She then attacked me sexually within 10 minutes...lol. But as soon as they feel they have you under their spell, you're no longer all that attractive.
So, stay in no contact. While there are no guarantees, there's a good chance you haven't heard the last from her.
@Nic777 - Yes exactly. A man with a high self worth is VERY attractive to women.
Please keep the content coming nonstop!
Absolutely!
I made all the mistakes you said. Stayed and failed to enforce boundaries. And suffered all the consequences you mentioned. Walking away from someone you love is truly one of the hardest things to do but I have learned the hard way it's sometimes the best option.
Yes, it's very difficult! I've had to do it more than once & it doesn't get any easier.
I have been watching different Dating Coach at RUclips for years, you are the top one. I really appreciate your help.
Thank you very much! I appreciate that!
I will be honest, walking away is focking painful. But in the end of the day life itself is painful. We can either get bitter over this or we can learn from it. Whoever is reading this, I hope u the best in life and relationships💪
When you love the girl, walking away is extremely painful. But always put your self respect above all else. Women must respect you above anything else...women don't love or sleep with men whom they don't respect.
It is hard as f*** to walk away from the friend zone, but it is painful as f*** to stay there
It's very difficult to walk away from anyone who you love or care about. But you're right...it's even worse to stay.
Walked away from my avoidant gf and I haven't looked back.
Good. Let her fix herself...
Said i was her best friend. she stopped trying, caring. ghosting happened. I walked away, she tried to gas light. I'm 1 week into no contact, its been incredibly hard. luckily an old friend has come back into my life and she is putting in max effort to hang and talk
It's very difficult if there's an emotional attachment.
I had a girl who made dating her very difficult for me, she would never be available when I ask her for a date but would play games with me by saying I am busy after 2 weeks or choosing a day where I was working. After trying to ask her out twice without success I decided to walk away. If she gets back to me or not its a win/win for me either way as if she comes back I have her respect and if she does not then I have saved myself some time and from stress.
Yes, absolutely! Great mindset! You did the right thing!
Yeah, I made the mistake of not having the strength to walk away from a woman (who was bread-crumbing me) who refused dates with lame excuses. I threw a lot of self respect down the drain and a lot time (giving her free attention) when I should have just walked away early. Unfortunately good videos like this come too late.
Yup. I've been there too. It's such a waste of time & it will slowly chip away at your self esteem, making you feel like you're not good enough. But, it's them...not you. From here on out, see yourself as the prize...& remind yourself of that anytime you find yourself in a similar situation.
@Nic777 Yes. It's always a good idea to do the "take away" when a woman is making things difficult. This basically means that you back out of the date when she starts making demands. A woman should be excited to spend time with you...& you should not have pay for her time, whether that be with money or extra unnecessary effort.
@Nic777 Women find it extremely attractive when a man has a high self worth.
I finally was able to walk away because she has been manipulating me.
That's great! It's a difficult move when you love the girl.
I'm in the process of walking away from my wife, we are starting the divorce process. After 7 months of marriage she lost all interest and has stopped putting in effort, including standing me up on Valentine's day which I think is because she was with another guy. It's been 48 hours of no contact.
That's rough, man. Unfortunately these sort of things can happen sometimes. It's difficult to say why this happened based on this information, but if you tried to work things out & she's not cooperating or trying to work things out herself, then there's not much point of continuing. Especially if you suspect there's another man. Her actions from here will determine whether or not she wants this to work. She's faced with divorce & losing you...if she doesn't fight for you/your marriage, then you're making the right decision. You just want to do your best to not get attached to any outcomes...give her the space to fight for you while moving forward with your life.
Another great content ❤️
One tip for you guys keep watching these videos again and again so that you remember all these things .. goodluck
Great tip! Thanks , man!
Hey man ! I dated this girl for around 6 months. We were exclusive but didn't have bf or gf label. I tried once to give that label but she told me " I want to wait until you have a job". So I agreed and got a job. When I got the job she broke up with me and told me "don't expect a relationship from me" but "If you want to keep hanging out and having fun we can still see each other". She told me that I wasn't apporting as much money as her in the relationship. I told her it was bc I didn't have a job and that I would be apporting more now that I have a job. She also wants to travel during this year.Long story short I accepted to still hangout with her. 3 weeks ago I asked her to hangout and she gave me a lame excuse which I respond "Ok, let me know when you got free time and let's cacht up" the told me "Ok". I haven't heard from her for 3 weeks man. I really miss her :,( but I have been trying to let her go during NC and let it be. Has been super difficult. :(
I don't know how long you went without a job during this relationship, but it sounds like that was a big part of it. Unfortunately, a man without a job, or making little money, is the male equivalent of a woman gaining a lot of weight & letting herself go...it's unattractive & a turn off. And women are rather ruthless about it. You made the mistake of agreeing to continue to "hang out" when she broke-up with you. Women often do this to either continue getting attention for you without having to invest in you, or as a way for her to feel better about the breakup ("well I offered him friendship. It's not my fault if he doesn't accept it.")...or a combination of both. NEVER accept anything less than what you want (ie: romance), because girls just lose more respect & attraction for you when you do. You handled it right after she gave you a lame excuse. So, when/if she does reach out, arrange a date. If you hang out with her, you want to do it in a romantic/sexual context. If she rejects that, then she no longer gets your attention. Again, tell her to get touch when she wants to get together, but you're not interested in being "just friends" when you want to kiss her, hold her, make love to her, etc.
Hey there, I’ve been watching your vids and they have helped me so much . My ex recently dumped me over communication and other things . She basically switched moods a month or so back because a situation happened in her home town . Although she wouldn’t tell me because I “wouldn’t understand” I tried to be there an comfort as much as possible , she then turned into a pick me girl with the “you don’t love me” “you don’t like me or I don’t make you happy” and the whole 9 yards and calling me out for “lies” and excuses for not texting her right away or where I was when she had my location the entire time and evidence of friends to back me up . She always forced me into a corner and made me go into defense mode because I simply couldn’t apologize anymore for these mistakes I’ve been making . All of this happened over text while she has been away for a couple of weeks but her emotional abuse and blame game has me thinking if I’m truly are narcissist or gas lighter. But yet she matched all of the traits of one . Am I going crazy ? Thanks
It sounds to me that she feels she's not getting enough attention. This is a big thing for women...they thrive on attention, because they like to feel special. I can't say if her frustration about this is warranted or not, but it sounds to me that she is just trying to manipulate you into submission, which is usually the case. You've already apologized, whether she was right or not, so there's no need to continue to apologize. if you believe you're a narcissist, then it's definitely something to look into, but there's really no point in trying om figure out if she is or not. It boils down to whether or not you can accept her for who she is or not.
She "put her hands on me".. I walked away! 💪
Isn't that what you want...for her to put her hands on you? Unless it was done in a violent way...
@@SkillofAttraction it was in a violent way
@@thomasmachado7198 then definitely walk away from that!
@@SkillofAttraction I absolutely did leave and never accepted her apology.
@@thomasmachado7198 Good! I heard some say this the other day, "Saying I'm sorry is just something people say to stop feeling bad...it's selfish". There's a lot of truth to that. For big situations, such as this, it's always a good idea that you don't accept halfhearted apologies & make sure that they SHOW you how sorry they are before you consider accepting their apology.
One of your best teaching videos.
Thanks, man! Glad you found it helpful!
She put her work and studies above me. When I've been understanding and giving her space. She repeats this all the time when I expressed. And I've walked away multiple times.. Now I just can't take it anymore. After all that chance I gave her, again she pulls away from me. And when I finally decided to walk away.. all she said was all the best. I don't know why I fooled myself for so long
Yeah, it really stings when you discover you didn't mean as much to her as you thought you did. I've been there. But you'd be surprised how time & space can change a woman's attitude. There's no guarantee that it'll change anything, but I've found that real time away (not just a few days or weeks) & actually moving on can rattle a woman IF she cares enough. If you've come back many times after walking away, chances are that she doesn't believe that you'll be gone for long. Show her that you're serious.
@@SkillofAttraction I'm gonna focus on myself now. Like what you've mentioned in your videos. Feels like I'm at the point of my life where I need a complete 180 change. For myself.. And not focus on her. Thank u for the videos. I truly appreciate it. I'm subscribing and will continue to follow the lessons
This one I 100 percent get and I have done this but they never chase and strangely enough I knew when they wouldn't
Sometimes they will chase. It all really depends how much attraction they feel &/or how emotionally bonded they are to you. Regardless, you walked away with your dignity & self respect intact, which is most important.
If they were emotionally and physically attracted, then they will chase otherwise you were just being used for attention and validation. Similar to the coach said, you have come out the real winner because you didn’t chase after someone who doesn’t respect your worth and you chose not to lower yourself to their level. Put it this way, you have more chances of meeting more unworthy women than the worthy one because there is more wrong ones than right one. Hence why real men never get attached because a genuine woman will always chase as soon as you make it clear to them that you are attracted without being creepy or needy.
@@AndyKirtland11 Yes, exactly!
This video is spot on, thank you for your time and investment
Glad it was helpful! Thanks for watching!
Powerful message
Thank you!
My man thanks and God bless
You're very welcome!
Walking away is a good filter
Absolutely!
Great episode 👍
Thank you!
Great video...thank you...
Why, thank you, sir! Thanks for watching!
Strength,is not putting up with BS.
yes, true.
Im in a tough situation where im about a 3 in looks, no money, no social status... I managed to get with a good looking woman. But she treats me horribly and i just cant seem to walk away. Ive been alone most of my life. No friends no family... I feel like ive been drowning for so long, she gave me new life after 12 years... I feel like just walking away would just land me back in the abyss quite possibly forever
You NEED to walk away from that, it's only tearing you down further. You should come join us on the site & get feedback from other men: soa.fm
In your situation I would keep the sex and let rest roll down your back knowing your getting what want. At least milk the cow till its dry and ignore the rest. she'll respect your indifference to the BS she tries to disrespect you with. This happens to the most desirable of men just not often. So fuck it all you can till its replaced
I don't walk........I run.
Just letting you know there's a word missing from the title. Either "of" or "in".
Good catch. Fixed.
Putting something down for a minute isn't walking away. Sometimes we have to 'walk away' when we are sick, from our job. Walk away from family members etc. It's not usually forever. It shouldn't be posed as such.
In this context, it isn't putting something down for a minute...it's walking away for good.
A week ago I walked away from my girlfriend of 6 months.
I had enough of feeling like I was not so much of a priority to her.
After a few days had past I reached out and asked her if we could talk and work things out. She told me she has been trying not to cry every 5 minutes ever since and needs time to think about what she wants as she is away with her friends.
I haven't messaged her since that text, how do you rate my chances of her coming back to me?
Your mistake here was going back on your decision, which will give her a sense of indecisiveness from you, which is a turn-off & scares women due lack of consistency & making her feel unsafe. If you really wanted her back, it would have been best that you just let her come back to you. If she cares enough, if she values & loves you, she will be back...they always come back eventually. She even told you she always feels like crying. You were holding all the power (which women love btw), but by reaching out to her & asking her to come back, you gave all the power over to her. So, the best thing you can do now is to just continue to give her space...stay in no contact until you hear from her. The chances of you hearing from her are on the high side (but no guarantees). And if/when she decides to give this another go, be sure that she's earning you. You will be the priority when she has to earn you. It's when you make it too easy for her that she begins to take you for granted.
Your Right? We have been messing around in bed and helping with money.We both grown.But I just moved here to bee closer to her.Mistake!!😮😮Now I just cut here off completely.She was just using me.
Typically it's not a good idea to sacrifice your life for hers, ie: uprooting your life to be closer to her. Why? Women don't respect it. If anyone is uprooting their life, it should be her in order to be closer to you. Most people don't think these things matter, but they do. But I'm glad to hear you walked away from a woman using you, because they will if you allow it.
Had this chick flake on me. I would send text messages and she would respond in a day or 2. I simply walked away. 3 days later, she hits me up with a 'hey you, what's up'. My response to her was 'I am good. Thanks'. She blocked me 2 days later.😅😅😅
Her greeting seems a bit flirtatious, so she knew that she was losing you. Sounds like she got frustrated that you didn't play along & chase her, & she had a little temper tantrum as a result. But you handled exactly how you should have...
@@SkillofAttractionthe girl I was talking to just unfriended me after I told her talk to me when she wants to date do u know what that could mean?
Siiighhh... Honestly I feel like walking away and mirroring your gfs emotions when she goes cold and all that are so much more easier when you don't really give a shit about her... Especially in the beginning in the relationship.. You like her but you don't like her all that much and it's in those moments she chases so hard... Buys you stuff... Writes you romantic messages... Even uses the L word first on you but it's like once you start returning to those feelings... Once you begin to actually really develop feelings for her... You just lose your edge!
You unconsciously validate her more.. Give her more attention... Things that she would or wouldn't do before that wouldn't even bother you, start to bother you... Like when ya'll are still in the beginning stages... Her last seen on whatsap is super late... And you don't care... You just keep living your life.. But once you start to have feelings.. Her last seen on whatsap is super late and then your insecurity begins to show... "oh maybe she was talking to some other guy" or something like that... It's just so ridiculous... I wish there was a way to not care even though you do care 🤦🤦🤦
It's certainly way more difficult once you develop an emotional attachment. That's why dating is easy & relationships are hard...or one of the reasons. This is also why she's so into in the beginning, you were indifferent to an outcome & she felt like she had to earn your time, attention, & ultimately your heart. So, you want to do your best to bring those mindsets into your more serious, committed relationships. It won't be perfect & not nearly as easy as it was in the early stages, but having purpose in your life & some independence outside the relationship will certainly help with this. So, stay focused on building your value(body, mind, & spirit), engage in hobbies & being social, continue dating & courting her...even if you're married, be sure that she continues to earn your love everyday, keep flirting with her & other women(of course don't cross the line with other women), try to stay present & not get too attached to any outcomes, & above all...always try to keep things on the fun & playful side.
I'm not sure if you've seen this video, but be careful not to fall into this trap when you begin to realize that you like her: ruclips.net/video/SlDrngle6rA/видео.html
I coulnt stop laughing this is f*cking true , this is what i am going throught right now, the last seen on whatsapp, first the the return message was late i confronted her and asked why that was my biggest mistake then she started hidding her last seen and blamed me for being insecure. Lesson learned.
my girlfriend said she had lost feelings i am going through a rough time i lost a family member and i will admit i have been kind of cold i think that if she can't support me through this she might not be the greatest girl for me but i still love her
Yeah, this tough to deal with when you're going through a difficult time. Her emotions don't know the difference between you being distant due to losing a family member & you being cold & not invested just because. Women are naturally solipsistic, which basically means that it's all about her & how she feels. The good ones will be patient & at least try to be understanding. It's always best that, no matter what's going on, you at least try to make some quality time for her, or whichever girl you're with at the time. Yes, she SHOULD be cutting you a break all things considered, so perhaps she's not the girl for you, but chances are that you'll run into this on some level no matter which woman you're with. With this one, I recommend that you at least cut her loose for now. Walk away & go no contact. There's a very good chance (if this was an LTR) that after you give her some space & don't chase after her that she'll be back once she feels what life is like without you.
@@SkillofAttraction thank you
I want to keep my GF, love her. But her efforts are minimal. I'm thinking walking away is my only option but trying to figure out how to do it as tenderly as possible.
Have you seen my video on that exact topic? ruclips.net/video/aDW0Enxro4U/видео.html
I'll check it out! Thank you. I don't typically have a middle gear. I'm either go with the flow or come off as very quietly intense. GF immediately goes into tantrum mode
She can value me from afar.
Definitely keep her away if she's not good for you...
What a informative video man!! I got a question though, i been dating this woman for 4 months and the convo is gradually dying. She does t send morning texts any more she does want to face time any more she doesn’t ask about my day even though I ask about hers and I show my care she says she is sick or going through some thing. Idk what I did, I did things that no other man did for her before and she told me she loves me so many time s. Help idk what to do.
Based on what you shared here, it sounds to me that perhaps you're doing TOO much for her. It's counterintuitive, but when you try to stand out above the rest of the men by going above & beyond your typically boyfriend duties, it always backfires. I used to do this sort of thing too. Women begin to take you for granted & stop investing in you. This causes the man to try harder, thinking he's not doing enough, while it's just pushing her away further. You must put women in a position to EARN your love & attention. It's just part o0f human nature that we cherish that which we must earn, & take for granted that which comes easily. So, for starters, I recommend that you begin to pull back your attention & investment in her until she begins to do her part. Don't get passive-aggressive, just turn your attention on productive activities (pursing goals, hobbies, etc) until she begins to invest in you again. It can be a little scary at first, thinking you might lose her this way, but if she cares I promise that that will not happen. In fact, she will find you more attractive this way. It will help you to check out some more of my videos as well so you can begin to understand how female attraction works.
@@SkillofAttraction First of all, I just want to thank you for your responds it’s means a lot to me. I face timed a week ago and I confronted her one on one, this way seem the more logical way and the more man way to do it since I literally can’t get her off my head. She says that she is sooo busy with school that she doesn’t have time for me, yet I know if she is lying to me because she posts on Social media. I told her to communicate better and ended the call with a good vibe. That same day she was communicating with me just find then the next day she went back to her same bs, not texting not FaceTiming at all and mind you this girl used to stay up till the morning with me before school. I know that she would never be going out with some one else, I think she just lost feeling but I find it difficult because I ask about her day and genuinely care about it her even though she does do the same. So today I stoped talking to her, and it’s pains me that she didn’t even notice or care at all. I tried to go to the gym today and I literally couldn’t even focus. I think I am doing the right thing here but in the back of my head I always thing “ yea maybe she is just too busy or this might be a test”. She has been hurt before and I promised her that will never happen to her again but now it’s seems like it’s the other way around. All my friends told me to move on and that she is just waisting your time. But she is different than any other girl. Do you think not talking to her is the right thing to do? This is literally eating me up inside.
Sounds like a long distance BS romance. Why do you need a morning text? Does she also wipe your butt? Facetime? WTF.
I am depressed after rejection but i made this firm decision after deep thinking
Rejection stings, especially if you've invested a lot, but walking away with your self respect in tact will make you feel better in the long term.
We dated during December 2021 but this Jan. 2022 we are just friends, i want us to be a couple, so I walk away from her. I hope she comeback
If she moves you into the friend zone, the best thing you can do is walk away. Being "just friends" with a woman you're attracted to or love is torture.
@@SkillofAttraction is there a possibility that she is just bluffing and she want me to try harder? But me walking away show strength, right?
@@johnlaurencechan3035 This is the trap many men fall into...believing that if they try harder they will get results. It's counterintuitive, but if a woman is pushing you away the worst thing you can do is try harder, because it conveys a lack of abundance in your life, which is a turn off. So, instead you want to convey that you have plenty of options (even if you don't) by walking away & leaving the door open for her in case she changes her mind. That will show that your emotionally strong & confident that you're her best option, which is turn on. There's no guarantee that she'll be back, but this is the best way to do it.
@@SkillofAttraction its also counterintuitive, Im thinking by walking away, she will change her mind and comeback to you
@@johnlaurencechan3035 Yes, it is counterintuitive...but it communicates to her that you're strong & confident, & that you have options...which all of that will make you more attractive to her. It MAY also tell her that she made a mistake by putting you into the friend zone. if you chase after her, it will most likely confirm to her that she was right by putting you into the friend zone.
Do you know why some women get processive over their men?
(For example keep asking him to grow a beard or dress a perticular style, jealous of him talking to other women, asking him who he is talking too all the time)
Oh, "possessive". Well, her jealousy is simply due her feeling that you're such a great catch that another woman may snatch you up & take you away from her. So, it's flattering in a way. However, her trying to change your style COULD be her trying to find out if she can control you, or trying to make you unattractive to other women, OR it's just suggestion that she would like. I do not recommend that you change for her. She fell for you the way that you are. You can take her style suggestions into consideration & if you feel it works for you, then give it a try. BUT, only do it for you.
...and it's a shame bc, she can only see the updates, but not a single word from me as to what im doing in life. Its a shame ppls egos are so fragile nowadays, can't even reach back out to someone. Eventhough you turned them away originally. It could've of been a case of her saying," ik I said what I said rhe other day, but can we talk "? Something like that . But regardless, I've got no hate towards her
I don't know what happened to your other comment...I see it in the notifications, but not in the comments or spam filter. I couldn't read the whole thing. Anyway, you offered to make it work & gave her a final chance, but she didn't take you up on your offer. That's all you can do. The ball is in her court now. I know it sucks when you have no control over the situation, but you do have control over what you do from here. It's best to turn your focus onto your self improvement, pursuing your goals, being social...including getting back out there into the dating market again. if she cares enough, she'll be back at some point.
Hey man
Great content
I wanna tell u my story and i want u to tell me if i did the right thing or not ....
I met a girl and we was a very close and we liked each other for maybe 10 months .. then suddenly she pulled back because i told her my real feelings about her so i think she lose her interest of me day by day month by month until she not answering my calls or text me back in snapchat ,
I know deep inside in her she loves me and we had a great memories but she want to live the experience and date another guys so
I feel panic , i was broken and sad
Then i decided to pull back
1 week no contact till yesterday I removed her from instagram and snapchat .
So did i do the right thing?
Can u advise me please
Thank you
Based on what you shared here, it sounds like you were too invested, which gave her the idea that you like her more than she likes you. In this situation, it lowers a man's value significantly. All women want a high value man, they want a man who they can look up to with respect & admiration. When you show a woman that you like her more than she likes you, it actually places her on a pedestal. Women have to choice but to look down on you when she's way up there. So she begins to lose respect, & with a loss of respect comes a loss of attraction. She may still be physically attracted to you, but emotionally it's not there anymore. Yes, you want to implement the "no contact rule", which simply means that you do not initiate contact for ANY reason. if she reaches out to you, I don't recommend ignoring her (at least not yet). Assume she's missing you & tell her that you'd like to see her, & ask her when she's free to get together. If she declines, tell her to get in touch when she wants to get together. I have many videos on no contact...in fact I have a playlist of all my no contact videos, which I recommend that you watch so you understand. Just go to the playlist tab on my channel.
DID HE JUST FART IN THE VIDEO TIME: 1.46 & 1.47... GUYS USE YOUR EARPHONES😂😂🤣
You're hearing things...
Yes i hear he farted🤣
Sir I recently had to walk away from a woman who happened to be my collegue at work (I know this is bad mistake) but one thing led to next and we met up after work and made out. Now after date she texted me and I asked her out but she said she was busy and was travelling to another country. I told her to let me know when she was back because I wanted to see her. She ignored me for week even after she came back and I found out she was hanging out with another girl (she is bi). Soon I realised that she might have deleted my number. So I decided to walk away from her until I saw her today at the workplace. She said hi to me but I told her "hi I'm going to grab lunch with X and have to rush! goodbye!". Was I too cold to this woman? I'm worried I might have come across as butthurt
No, you were not too cold. You tried to arrange a date & she was unresponsive. You want give women limited attention when they are not investing into you. When/if she reaches out to you again, then you give her a little attention...& then a little more when she agrees to a date. But, I'm glad you got to experience how effective walking away really is. You then gave her the freedom to come to you at her own pace. Women find this very attractive in a man.
Hey Coach. Off topic question. Do you think it's possible that a woman's grumpiness can sometimes be a way to test a man's frame? (i.e. how he responds would determine if her attraction for him rises or falls)
It's possible I suppose, but I'd normally chalk that up to her just having a bad day. I don't know the situation, so it's difficult to say for sure.
@@SkillofAttraction thanks for sharing your thoughts! A fair share of the women I've dated have been grumpier than I'd like at times. I've noticed that if I lose my cool and get grumpy back it tends to push them away big time, whereas if I stay calm while standing my ground in an assertive, rational way, it seems to bring them closer. I guess it may be a case of the ocean crashing against the rocky cliff metaphor. The woman's emotions are like the wild, sometimes stormy ocean and the man must be like a solid rocky cliff/mountain to act as a kind of counterbalancing force.
Come on, do you not understand a womans cycle? Funk me, they can change moods from morning to afternoon. Ignore it, they are not testing, they are naturally like that.
This really gives me strength after i made decision of walking away after kind of getting rejected by this girl
They may try to shame you for walking away, because they want to continue getting your attention & investment. Don't fall for it.
A date of mine after a few weeks dropped mid conversion 'oh I met a great guy today and I gave him my number... I was shocked but wished her well and hoped he contacted her and told her I won't be an option and 'play second fiddle' and I left.. . Was it a 'test'...I'm gutted, will she contact, was it real or just to see my reaction or her way of saying its over....?
You can't fight for somebody. It's the same with guys. You like a guy who is your friend and you like other guys less where you are not really friends.same with women. She likes you as how you are as a human and personal being your whole personality or not. There is nothing to fight.
Correct. The only time to fight for someone is when they're fighting for you.
Doesn’t walking away contradict you’re*indifference*video? A man who’s indifferent to a woman cheating wouldn’t care that she cheated. So,why would he walk away?
No. Be indifferent emotionally, but walk away to demonstrate your self respect. If you don't, she'll walk all over you.
Can you expand on the withholding sex part ?
Please see the pinned comment.
My gf has been dealing with very bad depression and is pulling away from me. She isn’t invested in the relationship, how much time should I give her before I walk away? If any
That's very difficult to deal with & you may have to be a little more patient than normal; however, a good way to judge how much time you should put in when she's giving you little in return...is she actively trying to help herself? if not, it's a good idea to encourage her to seek out help, or at least taking steps to feel better. if she's still not helping herself, & still not investing, then it's a countdown to the end. While it;s perfectly fine to be their for her & help out if she asks, whatever you do, do not try to fix her...you will lose yourself, she will lose respect or you, & it will be difficult to make the relationship work after that. What I recommend is that you give yourself a personal time limit. As an example, "I'll give her one month to seek out help & begin to turn things around in the relationship. if I don't see some kind of action, I'm walking away". But be sure to communicate where she's falling short first, because if you haven't talked to her about this yet, she may not even realize she's taking you for granted.
been together 4 years. After our 2nd daughter was born 17 months ago she changed she got cold. I got cold too, we argued bad for a few months. She started an online relationship months ago. I just found out in May. I wwnt to work it out. She wants to go. Shes hot and cold. now she is wrapped in this fabtasy that she doesnt want our kids. me. Nothing. I saw on her fone she was gonna take my kids and leave to be with him. I called her out on her “ exit strategy” she softened up. But, shes still talking and sexting with this guy. I am not tolerating this shit, its hard fir me to leave because i cant trust her with out kids. I feel i need to take my girls and leave HER. Its gonna destroy her though. WHATS Your advice?
There's no doubt about it, you're in a very difficult spot...& the kids trapped in the middle make it even more difficult. Not that it helps you in the present, but statistically affairs almost NEVER work out...& the ones that do (where they end up marrying) almost always end in divorce a few years later....but affairs are also a symptom of a rocky marriage. Most likely this other guy is saying all the things your wife has been wanting to hear from you. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying this is your fault...she made the decision to pursue this rather than discussing with you what's been bothering her about the marriage. However, she is missing something from you or she would've never gone down this road. Considering her fantasy of not having children tells me that she doesn't feel appreciated & loved. Regardless of all that, before you make any drastic decisions out of anger, & as long as she didn't get physical with this guy, I recommend that you first try the "180 Plan"...this is to get you back into power & to have some control over this situation: beingabeautifulmess.wordpress.com/the-180/ It might also be a good idea to speak to a divorce lawyer just to see what your options are & what you're up against. I'm not at all suggesting that you divorce her...I realize that's a huge decision that will have a big, life changing effect on you & your children...but it'd be helpful for you to know what your next steps could/should be.
Hi Coach, She is not ready to be courted due to mourning of her parent passed, how should I put on this? She said we can be friends for now but it depends it the future if things will work out and if I will be still consistent in my effort. I am confused if what will be my next move, though I really like her, I told her that I will wait once she's completely healed and ready.
Thanks and God Bless!
How I would handle this; do not fall into the "friend" trap, but since this seems to be a legitimate excuse, don't tell her that you won't be friends...just don't do it. In other words, don't hang out as friends, don't do things with her that friends would do, etc. However, if she reaches out to say hi or whatever, talk to her a bit, but try to keep the interaction a bit playful & flirty, but also keep it rather short. So, no long conversations sharing your feelings or anything deep. You never want to get into deep conversations until you're an actual couple, because it's anti-seductive & should be saved for building affection (as opposed to attraction). In order for romance to happen, a woman must feel sexual attraction for you first. Being friends first almost never works, because she begins to see you as a non-sexual friend. The idea is to communicate your sexual/romantic interest through flirting, & to keep your value high by not accepting her offer of friendship. She'll try to push for friendship, but it's essentially a test to see if you allow her to set the frame.
@@SkillofAttraction I've made my mind coach, from this this day on, it's her lost, I will be no more active in social media with her, because it really hurst. :((
I really appreciate your response on this. I wish you more blessing in helping us. Thank you Coach for guiding us. God bless you :))
I walked away .
I was bored of her .
That happens sometimes too...she's just boring.
Hey coach, so I have a question that slightly relates to this topic. Me and my girlfriend just got back together two days ago after a bad fight and us not talking for a few weeks. She downloaded dating apps in that time but when she used it while we weren’t together she would just have short conversations then just stop talking to guys. I told her that her having them is crossing my boundaries. She’s saying that she still wants time to figure things out even though she’s saying that she wants to be with me and is acting like we’re together. She says she doesn’t use the dating apps like that and that they are just there but I told her that it’s not the point. She doesn’t like the concept of her deleting them just to appease me in the relationship when I have been trying to understand her side of things when it comes our relationship issues. I feel like it shouldn’t really be a discussion at this point but at the same time I don’t want to push her too much when we’ve only just started again? How should I handle this? I don’t want to let her slide but want to do this in the best way possible.
Didn't we already discuss this?
@@SkillofAttraction I thought that a different strategy would apply since the situation is different then before.
@@SkillofAttraction I also don’t really remember the message and it’s not on video apologies
Ah I found it
For the woman who ghosted me, is her responding back a high likelihood? I haven’t been contacting her since she hasn’t responded to my last response after she asked how I was doing. It’s been a week and going in longer.
It's a likelihood that you will hear from her at some point IF you didn't turn her off. The fact that she reached out & asked how you are doesn't sound like you turned her off, but of course I cant say for sure. In cases such as this(if you didn't turn her off), it's most likely either something is up, such as; she's busy or perhaps had an emergency...she's testing you, OR there's another dude in the picture. It's usually the latter. I don't recommend waiting around for her, because who knows how long it will take, if ever. So, it's best to keep meeting & dating new women.
@@SkillofAttraction that’s what I was afraid off and that’s what I currently have trouble doing. Still can’t wrap around why she’d just ditch me like this for someone else just like that
@@Captivisiontv If that's the reason she ghosted you (another dude), then it's most likely because she already had an emotional attachment to him, like an ex or a guy she had been trying to lock down.
@@SkillofAttraction it’s been a week since going no contact and a week since she saw last message and all she does is view stories and occasionally like a post. I’m giving it 2-3 more weeks and it’s just really hurtful to think the worse. The kind of feeling where I’m not only heartbroken, but, have a loss of sense of identity and gave trouble sleeping due to thoughts of permanent loneliness for the rest of my life. 💔
@@SkillofAttraction otherwise, I hear you
Hey coach I’m in a situation where the girl I have been seeing for 2 months is having a visit from her ex after Christmas. She is also going home to visit him and his parents because she is international and stayed there over Covid. He will be sleeping in her bed when he comes to visit. She has said she will hook up with him if she chooses to. Should I walk away now? If she does? Thanks
Yes & no. This is a giant shit test & she's testing to see if you put up with it. The problem is, is she a committed girlfriend or are you just casually dating. If she's committed girlfriend (in other words, this is something that you've discussed & agreed to), then yes...walk away. Especially after that smug response of "I'll hook up with him if I choose to". If you're just casually dating, then there's not a lot that you can say...she has the freedom to spend time with other guys if she wants. However, that doesn't mean you have to put up with it. If it's the latter, what I'd do is pull away HARD & not reach out to her at all...& let her earn your attention back.
@@SkillofAttraction we are casually dating, at this point, although she knows I want more. Additionally she’s suggesting she wants to be sure about us in a named relationship as she suggests past trauma. I think I will wait until if and when she hooks up with whoever and then pull away hard. Thanks for the advice and any future advice. You definitely earned another follower.
@@Aoife1515 Yeah, you're in a tight spot, but you definitely don't want to allow any woman to walk all over you. However, the fact that you're casually dating doesn't really allow you to say she can't do this. You could always go out on a date with another girl so she knows that you too have options...or at least act like you have options. The trick with this is that you just don't rub it in her face. Doing something like this is more for you so YOU know that you cut & run if she pushes you too far.
Fuck, no.
Walk away, grow a pair of balls and actually mean it when you walk away.
Exactly! Always see yourself as the prize...
My girlfriend was always telling not to rush when I wanted to kiss her but eventually I kiss her but even when kissing and cuddling she says she doesn't want to do it! Today I learnt she is still not over her ex and when I confronted her about this she said thats reason she is not willing to rush she still has sad Instagram posts about her ex ... I said if she wants to be with me be there 100% or don't be there at all and after saying this she hung up the phone! I have not contacted her since... A while ago she was posting stories about indirectly about her ex and yesterday when we where in bed together her ex called her to which I hung up the phone.... What should I do or is there anything wrong I did?
When a woman tells you to slow down, it's best that you do that, because it's hr telling you that she's feeling smothered. When women feel smothered they begin to pill away & distance themselves. However, when a woman directly tells you that she needs space, or that things are moving too quickly, that means that she is at her limit. Here are a couple of videos where I cover his topic...
ruclips.net/video/MqjVIJh0Hro/видео.html
ruclips.net/video/0v0ytFe2NwY/видео.html
Now, as far as her ex goes, it does sound like she still has feelings for him & that she's not completely healed. Being involved with a woman in this place is going to lead to a lot of hot/cold behavior from her. I typically don't recommend being involved wit women who are not healed from a previous relationship. However, if you want to stay involved, then I recommend that you let her set the pace & come to you. So, arrange a date once a week & if she wants more than that, then let her chase you a bit.
@@SkillofAttraction she said we need to stop seeing each other what to do now?
@@Samir-kz8gb Tell her that's not what you want, but if that's what she wants then you'll let her go...then tell her to get in touch if she has a change of heart. Then no contact. This is counterintuitive, but oftentimes women do this when they're feeling smothered & they want to see if you'll actually let go & not chase after them. Sometimes when you handle it this way, they come back...but it's not guaranteed. However, if you fight to keep her & keep chasing her, it definitely will not work out.
@@SkillofAttraction thank you very much man! I'll talk with her once and then no contact! Back to focusing and developing Myself....
@@Samir-kz8gb That's the best thing you can do right now. She won't let you get away permanently if she truly wants you. In other words, she'll come find you when/if she decides that she wants you & then you can choose from there if you really want her or not.
She cheats RUN away and don't look back!
Right. There's no going back after she cheats: ruclips.net/video/w9FkQ_GMBDo/видео.html
My ex is talking to me but giving dead replies shall I walk away
That's a sign of low interest. If it's you reaching out to her, then cease all initiating & let her come to you. if she's the one reaching out...greet her with an upbeat attitude, tell her that you want to see her & arrange a date. If she rejects your offer, don't take it personally (se may be testing you), politely end the conversation, telling her to keep in touch. Next time she reaches out, do the same thing. if she rejects you this time, respond the same way, but after attempting to arrange a date twice & she rejects you two times in a row, then stop asking her. From that point, keep your conversations fun, but short...end the interaction on a high note if possible. The idea here is to convey that the door is open, that you're interested in a potential reconciliation, but you & your time is valuable & you're not going to waste it on someone who is not investing.
What are you even doing? Trying to be with a woman that would guilt and shame you
Most do try to guilt & shame to get their way.
I have emotional attachment to her but i have to go no matter what , now its her turn i mean it to walk away forever
If she cares enough she won't let you go. She may not fight right away, but she will eventually if you're important to her. The trick here is that you move on anyway & don't get attached to any outcomes with her.
Fart sound 1:50
Nice try...
Crash The Car …Death of a Man and Woman the the ones not ever heard…we keep on bleeding to the sound we that we know for sure……each passing day sunrise to sunset…..to the endless unreachable the farther we go ….Both in front seats full…..straight to the non exist …we meant to be doing this …..so Crash The Car straight through the stars…..burning in loves regret floor it and don’t let go! Crash the Car.....through the Stars….feelings running red from Love left behind of what we should and should not do…..the sirens fade away as death comes to meet us two…..nothing can change this view ….from the Car that shakes violently holding tightly to our beliefs…….what’s never been before I’ll die in my drivers seat……two hearts in seats heading straight for the non exist ….this is meant to be us doing this ……..Crash the Car ……through the Stars …..burning in Loves regret ……floor it tight and don’t let go …..Crash the Car straight through the Stars! We always knew Crashing through the Stars and now that its true Crashing through..straight for the non exist we meant to be doing this ……Crash the Car …..through the Stars ……burning in Loves regret …hold on tight … remember don’t let go! Crash the Car through the Stars burning in Loves regret holding on tight don’t let go Crash the Car through the Stars.
I don't get it. Is this song lyrics or something?
It feels like you talking to me , u r true American
Thank you, sir!