At the end of the story, him telling the wife she can come back home. Nope, she can come to get the rest of her stuff. At this point it's not about Lilly anymore it's about getting divorce
When your wifew spends a few months living with her ex-husband and says, "...we made a mistake..." it means, "I was sleeping with my ex-husband" and she was likely the one behind all the drama in the first place.
By her decision to leave her husband to support her daughter just shows that she doesn't understand what it means to be married. As sad as that is, I believe he needs to move on. The only thing that would change that is her doing some serious soul searching and repentance and telling him exactly what she did that was so wrong. Even then it would be a long painful road for both of them...and that is if she was truly sincere AND had not cheated on him.
Lily wanting a relationship with her bio dad is unerstandable is fine, but throwing her step dad under the bus is not ok after everything he did for her.
His wife went back to the ex to shack. Bet they had an ongoing affair for a year. Dude should be contacting a divorce lawyer instead of considering forgiving the daughter one day.
When my Sister got married, she had our step dad walk her down the aisle. Because she saw him as he actual dad. Even at this point both her and I had reconnected with our biological father, but he didn't raise us. So there was no point in letting him do so. So for the OP's step daughter to do this to him just means that she never saw him as her actual dad. So it isn't petty to withdraw. She betrayed the OP and she may not have verbally said that she doesn't think the OP is her dad, but her actions sure did.
You and your sister sound like awesome step kids to your step dad. I was lucky enough to have my dad all through my wedding but sadly lost him just 2 months later. If that weren’t the case and I had a step dad growing up that treated me well, it would be a cold day in hell that I wouldn’t not only invite him to my wedding but also do all the fatherly duties at the wedding. When someone raises you out of the goodness of their own heart and not out of obligation, sometimes those relationships are stronger than those made from blood
There is nothing wrong with a mother supporting her daughter. HOWEVER, the wife supported the daughter who was raised by OP and then turn her back on him. I'm shocked OP isn't more pissed at the wife. At the end of the day, she's the one who took vows, not the stepdaughter. I'd be giving them both the boot because they only see OP as an ATM. The moment the money ran dry all of a sudden, "they made a mistake". The only mistake made was marrying this woman and helping raise her child.
How many months did she live with her daughter and ex-husband planning a wedding and taking a honeymoon? You're right, "she's the one who took vows" and more likely than not has been cheating for years. It seemed too easy for her to do.
@@StephenRizzuto-n3x Yeah. I can understand moving out for a couple weeks to help with the planning. But she stay afterwards for like 2 months. There's no reason to do that unless she was cheating on her husband with him trying to play family with her ex.
@@dcg590it’s too bad he can’t prove that she only used him for the financial support, if he could he could sue her for every single penny he wasted in this douche canoes
Send the wife them papers too. There is no reason for her to move in to help with the wedding. She could've done that from her home. Her and tom was going down memory lane and she was throwing that ass. Especially she staying there months after the wedding, yeah she was throwing that ass in a circle that's why she said we've made a terrible mistake. I bet you did now sign here
What I don't understand is why the wife didn't come back after the wedding or why she had to move out to help with the wedding. He was betrayed by both of them and is better off without either.
@@StephenRizzuto-n3x that's what happens when you're a simp nowadays. you get stabbed in the back, left for dead and then just accept them back after they had their fun because you can't stop being a simp.
What I don’t understand is even if he didn’t walk her down the aisle, why couldn’t he attend the wedding? She can have friends, but not the man who raised her? This can’t be real.
When she said “people can change” you should have said “yes, you’ve changed a lot and not for the better”. I’m livid and it’s not even happening to me. Seriously, take that house back. You’re not wrong, she is entirely wrong.
Did anyone else expect the dead beat dad coming back just try and either get the house or move in because he was broke or something? Like if you thought the same.
I read something similar to this story. In another story,it was stepdaughter calling the biological father, and Op canceled the wedding venue and also the mother stood by Op, and the daughter engagement was called off.
oh yes I'm sure that was his idea. his daughter probably gushed about how the step father had bought her a house and did other caring monetary stuff he probably thought he was made. stupid little girl was coned by bio dad and lost a lot.
Thinking from an Asian standpoint (I've seen this firsthand with my sister's situation), I see it more as: He didn't want to do the hard part of raising her and taking care of her when she was young. Now that she's old enough and able to earn a living, he wants back so that he can take advantage of her.
If the wife ran off with her ex-husband and daughter for 6 months to plan a wedding and honeymoon, they were likely having an affair, but for how many years? The wife had the best of both worlds, a Chad and a simp. She thought she didn't need the simp anymore. Blame the daughter if you want, but the wife seems to have been cheating for years and likely manipulated everything to get her Chad back.
Heard a similar story before but no house gift. Long story short stepdad walked away leaving the so called happy family foot the bill. And stepdad lived happily ever after!
I’ll bet it was as much down to the Bio dad’s manipulation. I was the same with mine whenever he wandered back into my life again, the craving for acceptance and validation just makes you act irrational. Fortunately I was 13 when I realised it was something I was never going to get, I kept him at arms length for the rest of his life. It’s weird though but as soon as I stopped wanting or needing acceptance the more he seemed to be around but I never trusted him again and took all his promises with a pinch of salt, so was never really upset when he never came through on them.
Good afternoon from Mississippi!! You handled this awful situation the very best anyone could. You gave your heart to Lily and she betrayed you, your love, your kindness, as well as your wife did. Was she hoping to go back to her ex or something? She should’ve supported you 100%. You were there more for Lily than she was. You handled it all the right way. Lily is not a little girl anymore, but a grown woman. Let her come to you after she figures it all out. You were gifting her a house because of the relationship you had and your love for her. She betrayed that love and trust. Let bio dad buy her the house. You were absolutely right not to give it to her. She should not expect you to. Your wife should take your side because you did nothing wrong but love and take care of Lily. I wouldn’t let the wife come back until she agreed to counseling. They both need to put on their big girl pants and get their heads out of the sand. If you let them back in your life, I would set some ground rules so they don’t hurt you like this ever again. I wish you well and God Bless!
F-lily! Omg op, you were a dream step dad and the audacity of lily to disrespect the overwhelming luck that her mom found such a wonderful man. Keep the house away and spend it on yourself. Your charity work for the disadvantaged product of a divorce should now be over. Bio-dad only came around long enough to look good at the wedding and get that place of honour, and now it’s over so he has no real interest in the real work, the real commitment.
I agree. There was no other reason for her to stay there for like 2 months or more after the wedding. I understand leaving to stay with the daughter before the wedding. But staying for so long afterwards was weird.
This fool doesn't realize that Sara was most likely with her ex during the separation when she was with the daughter. Hence, "We made a big mistake". Don't take either one back!
I wouldn’t say that for sure that she was but I can’t fault your logic, but she was stuck in the middle of an impossible situation and she took a side. The one she could live with and the one I would expect a parent in this situation to do but I wouldn’t invite her back if it was me even if I knew for sure she wasn’t with the ex.
I wouldn’t say that for sure that she was but I can’t fault your logic, but she was stuck in the middle of an impossible situation and she took a side. The one she could live with and the one I would expect a parent in this situation to do but I wouldn’t invite her back if it was me even if I knew for sure she wasn’t with the ex.
OP is a SIMP to even consider forgiving these lowlife mother daughter duo, who saw OP only as an ATM. OP should cut his losses and focus on his happiness alone. Lily and Sarah are two peas in a pod. Sarah could have knocked some sense to Lily as a mother, reminding her about their past and her deadbeat father, but she didn't do it, which is a clear sign that she was okay with what her daughter was doing.
I pity daugher a bit (not because of OP's actions). But I wholeheartedly support OP's actions in stopping financial and emotional support. Moreover, I think he is wrong in inviting his wife back, since I believe that daughter wasn't the only one 'reconnecting' in those six months, 'we made a mistake', lol.
This girl could have both at her wedding. I don’t understand why she is excluding her step-dad. She needs to grow up and have the difficult conversation. Instead she ghosts her step-dad. Sad.
Is this ai story? Op keep on asking if he should let Lily reconnect with the biological father and all the memories stuff. Like just get to the point, what happened next?
All they see OP as is a cash dispenser. The stepdaughter showed her true feelings and how fickle she is, and his wife shows she not a loyal woman. OP is better off without them.
No u did the right thing taking back the house! Her cutting u completely out of her wedding is so petty and wrong! I feel like she only wants u around when it benefits her! And Her bio dad can buy her a house then! My heart goes out to u. But you r truly a real dad and your an amazing man! Never change..
Glad I’m not alone in this side*😘theory…..registered with feelings of so much utter common sense & normalcy that I’m having trouble classifying it as an assumption 😑
The OP's decision to take back the house and not pay for the wedding is totally called for because as the old saying goes:"ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS"and sad to say always will, now Lily needs to realize that her bio dad Tom can't and shouldn't be taken seriously for any reason whatsoever and put him out of her life for absolute good measure and never look back afterwards, and op should also decide to leave both Lily and Sarah behind as well for his own mental health's sake period.
I get the whole inviting the biological father to the wedding, but excluding the man who was there for you for the important moments just for the man who basically abandoned you is just petty and cruel. Kudos to the Stepdad for sticking to his guns and making the stepdaughter realize the error of her ways.
His wife moved out for 6 months and did not talk to him for half a year to plan a wedding 🤔, yeahhh she was cheating and left him probably for her ex and when that did not work out she wanted to go back to her back up plan
Lily is free to make her choices for her wedding. That being said, OP is too. He doesn't owe her a thing and altho she shud, she doesn't, this isn't the first reddit story where the child is ungrateful.
Forgiving isn’t the problem. Trusting her again is the problem. Forgiveness is as much for you as it is for her. That angst will eat you up inside if you don’t. Allowing yourself to trust her again however, will take a while. Emotional hurt takes Much, MUCH longer to heal than physical hurt. Those wounds open up on a whim for no reason at all. Take your time and heal or you Both will suffer for it.
This right here is absolutely One of the reasons why men should not get involved with single mothers. He raise that girl for 15 years how did she say thank you by uninviting him to the wedding so that her deadbeat father can come to the wedding I would be done
She easily could have invited both her dads to her wedding. She didnt need to cur off her relationship with you to build one with her biological dad. I'm so sorry your child did this to you. You dont deserve this pain! 😢
Never put all your basket into a kid that isn't blood. My dad learn that the hard way. My mom past away when we (5 kids, me and my bro and sis) were young, and my dad got re-marry, my step mom came with 2 kids, youngest 5 year old (Son), and oldest 12 years old (Daughter). My dad raised them treated them better than us because he wanted to please my step mom, he help them with loans and everything, while he told us to do it ourselves. 15+ years past, my step mom past aways, their kids convince my dad to get us to pay for her funeral, after much disagreement, we did. Then the day after we put my step mom in the grave, both of her kids abandon my dad (they were living under him with their mom), and no contacted him, making him come back to us and he was so sad, one of the last thing he told us "I wish, I wouldn't of threated you all so bad in favor of those good for nothing kids of my wife (step mom)" my dad past away 4 months later, and the good for nothing kids of our stepmom didn't show up or contribute to his funeral.
How the hell can he feel sorry for lily when she knew exactly what her bio dad was like, in fact everyone knew what he was like. He let her down at every single turn and now she expects him to be there from now on because he apparently changed. I can guarentee in a few years time the bio dad will try and creep back into lilys life, and she will be gullible enough to let him.
It's not as if Lilly had not been disappointed throughout her childhood. I could almost understand, but NOT excuse, her thinking if she had not seen him at all during her childhood either, but she had. I know plenty of people, since I was a child myself, who said unequivocally that their stepfather or stepmother was their real parent, not the biological one, so there really is no excuse. Lilly was just too spoiled by having the unconditional love of Op until she just pushed it off the edge of the Earth, so to speak. I'd be rethinking my marriage to my wife also, because she went along with it. I don't think I could have gone to the wedding if I were her.
It’s not always like that, as you grow up when the bio parent keeps popping in and out your life, you need to validate yourself to prove to yourself it wasn’t you that made them go away. I was fortunate at the age of 13 I realised it was my dad and not me that was the issue but not everyone in that situation is that lucky. All those that hold me up unto that point how he was going to let me down, I hated them and that need for validation just reinforced it.
Dont forgive and dont forget. Tom might reappear again in several years and Lily will do the same. She is a grown up woman, not a little girl - she should know better who is good and who is bad. Its the end of the family
Don’t let yourself be disposable in someone’s life. They will throw you away whenever it’s convenient. It’s time for you to live a life where you matter.
Do not trust her one bit. She may try to get close to you to try to see how she could set you up to get the house and more please keep away from her Do not trust her not one itsybit, plz,plz, plz.
As a father that walk down the aisle is sacred. Now I know several blended families where the Stepfather and Father have both walked the daughter down the aisle. love is fine, never exclude when you can include.
Your wife abandoned you and bet she was sleeping with the father of the child for the reason why she actually moved out in the first place. If I was you, I wouldn't take her back but have her get the rest of her things and would of divorced her for leaving in the beginning. Your wife wants you back and to reconcile with her daughter because the bills are piling up and they need your money. You should never marry a woman with another man's kids because they will never love or respect you like the biological father. You did the right thing by taking the house gift back.
You go back to that step daughter, and your find out when you need her again, that she throws you away like the last time again. Once they show you who they are, no matter how sad they might be, you let them go. Wait till your in the hospital, she will revert to herself because she has to take care of you and abandon you while your on the Dbed.
The daughter rejected her stepfather as family by her actions. It speaks volumes on how little she deserves Amy sort of forgiveness. For op's wife to leave after everything. The hurt and betrayal op felt. Yet she chose to comfort her daughters bad choice and allowed her to make an obvious mistake. This is all deserved. I'm not op but if I was I would not forgive any of them easily. If even at all. Op deserves soo much better then this.
Nope, Lilly needs to apologize and she needs to make amends to OP. Regardless, she could have allowed her bio father into her life with totally excluding OP, that was silly and unnecessarily.
The OP should have been more understanding for Lilly wanting to connect with her bio dad. However, Lilly shame on her for just cutting him out like that. For not thinking about every time he was there to pick the piceas up. Sarah shame on her for moving out. That was some bs. She basically said I choose him over you to.
I dont think he wasnt understanding. As a matter of fact he understood quite well. It was the fact that she COMPLETELY EXCLUDED him on her wedding day. Even if she had asked bio dad to walk her down the aisle is a big slap in the face. The face that he wasnt even invited AT ALL was the point. Not that he didnt understand her wanting to reconnect w dead beat dad
"we are so sorry it was a mistake, after 2 month he had already disappeared again not answering to lily or sarah" ummm why tf are u in contact with ur ex after moving out of ur house to "just help with lily's wedding prep" dude it is so obvious she cheated with her ex, planned to leave to rekindle the lost family and then he left again after getting the 🐱 a couple last times. prove me wrong
Divorce her too, why did she move out just to help plan the wedding? Seems like they all played happy family and now that they've been abandoned again, they want their option B & ATM back in their lives. Get rid of the both of them!
I’m so confused, why is the wife acting like she’s Switzerland during all this?!? Pretty sure his wife was fully aware she was in contact with the deadbeat. This is beyond hurtful. They don’t miss him, they realize how much financial security they gave away willingly.
Update to the story. Sarah was staying with the ex for 6 months behind OPs back and playing happy family while he was abounded. He ended up filing for divorce and will go no contact with both of them. He finally learned to be the type of guy these two girls wanted and deserved lol one that leaves.
I don't see why you would let your wife back after all of her support to Lilly and Tom, none to you. A wife should have her husbands back. It seems to me they are using you for your money.
Its gonna hurt like fire, but that child doesn't deserve your kindess. You did right by her in raising her, but now you have to let her go. Excluding you as if you're not her father is insensitive and cold.
Yeah, I was Lily many moons ago, the need for validation and acceptance can make you act completely irrational, thankfully I realised that the acceptance was never going to come. Thankfully I was only 13 when I worked it out so I never burned my bridges as much as she did.
So after he has funded them through the child’s life they both drop him like a hot potato for Tom? Sorry but I would be asking for a divorce, he was nothing but a meal ticket
![[Full Story] I Refused to Let My Bully Half-sister Be My Bridesmaid So She Showed Up Drunk in...](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/15S_Rd9pnlo/mqdefault.jpg)
![[FULL STORY] I Suspect My Fiancé of Cheating With My Best Friend So I Make a Plan and...](/img/1.gif)
At the end of the story, him telling the wife she can come back home. Nope, she can come to get the rest of her stuff. At this point it's not about Lilly anymore it's about getting divorce
I felt the same way. His wife left him for SIX MONTHS and he just tells her she can come back home anytime?!? Oh heck no!!!
"we made amistake" how much you wanna bet the wife cheated and tried to get back with the guy?
Totally agree, wife was complicit in this mess, she still have feelings for Tom who knows she may have been “clapping cheeks” with him over the years.
When your wifew spends a few months living with her ex-husband and says, "...we made a mistake..." it means, "I was sleeping with my ex-husband" and she was likely the one behind all the drama in the first place.
By her decision to leave her husband to support her daughter just shows that she doesn't understand what it means to be married. As sad as that is, I believe he needs to move on. The only thing that would change that is her doing some serious soul searching and repentance and telling him exactly what she did that was so wrong. Even then it would be a long painful road for both of them...and that is if she was truly sincere AND had not cheated on him.
Nah man take back the house, not inviting you is petty .
I agree with your decision
Deadass
"We made a terrible mistake", sounds like 2 lovely women and did sarah had some fun with tom too?☺️
What Lily has done is far beonde petty, it's massive cruelty. She's broken OP's heart.
Lily wanting a relationship with her bio dad is unerstandable is fine, but throwing her step dad under the bus is not ok after everything he did for her.
I kept wondering why she needed to completely exclude him from the wedding. Like wtaf?
His wife went back to the ex to shack. Bet they had an ongoing affair for a year. Dude should be contacting a divorce lawyer instead of considering forgiving the daughter one day.
I agree
When my Sister got married, she had our step dad walk her down the aisle. Because she saw him as he actual dad. Even at this point both her and I had reconnected with our biological father, but he didn't raise us. So there was no point in letting him do so.
So for the OP's step daughter to do this to him just means that she never saw him as her actual dad. So it isn't petty to withdraw. She betrayed the OP and she may not have verbally said that she doesn't think the OP is her dad, but her actions sure did.
You and your sister sound like awesome step kids to your step dad. I was lucky enough to have my dad all through my wedding but sadly lost him just 2 months later. If that weren’t the case and I had a step dad growing up that treated me well, it would be a cold day in hell that I wouldn’t not only invite him to my wedding but also do all the fatherly duties at the wedding. When someone raises you out of the goodness of their own heart and not out of obligation, sometimes those relationships are stronger than those made from blood
There is nothing wrong with a mother supporting her daughter. HOWEVER, the wife supported the daughter who was raised by OP and then turn her back on him. I'm shocked OP isn't more pissed at the wife. At the end of the day, she's the one who took vows, not the stepdaughter. I'd be giving them both the boot because they only see OP as an ATM. The moment the money ran dry all of a sudden, "they made a mistake". The only mistake made was marrying this woman and helping raise her child.
How many months did she live with her daughter and ex-husband planning a wedding and taking a honeymoon? You're right, "she's the one who took vows" and more likely than not has been cheating for years. It seemed too easy for her to do.
@@StephenRizzuto-n3x Yeah. I can understand moving out for a couple weeks to help with the planning. But she stay afterwards for like 2 months. There's no reason to do that unless she was cheating on her husband with him trying to play family with her ex.
Op messed up marrying a single mother. Mom used him, he allowed it.
Mother only saw him as atm, married him for help like all single mothers.
@@dcg590it’s too bad he can’t prove that she only used him for the financial support, if he could he could sue her for every single penny he wasted in this douche canoes
Send the wife them papers too. There is no reason for her to move in to help with the wedding. She could've done that from her home. Her and tom was going down memory lane and she was throwing that ass. Especially she staying there months after the wedding, yeah she was throwing that ass in a circle that's why she said we've made a terrible mistake. I bet you did now sign here
What I don't understand is why the wife didn't come back after the wedding or why she had to move out to help with the wedding. He was betrayed by both of them and is better off without either.
True he got cheated on old memories my guess
The wife was likely the one who put the daughter up to the drama. The wife wanted her ex back and the current husband is a simp for taking her back.
@@StephenRizzuto-n3x that's what happens when you're a simp nowadays. you get stabbed in the back, left for dead and then just accept them back after they had their fun because you can't stop being a simp.
@@StephenRizzuto-n3x I have been watching Thai stores (thinking to move there) this is a classic long con. what whas the "wife" doing for 6 months?
What I don’t understand is even if he didn’t walk her down the aisle, why couldn’t he attend the wedding? She can have friends, but not the man who raised her? This can’t be real.
Take the house back. She is so wrong.
When she said “people can change” you should have said “yes, you’ve changed a lot and not for the better”. I’m livid and it’s not even happening to me. Seriously, take that house back. You’re not wrong, she is entirely wrong.
Did anyone else expect the dead beat dad coming back just try and either get the house or move in because he was broke or something?
Like if you thought the same.
It's so obvious. I doubt he(bio) has the money for the wedding, much less to buy his daughter a houae
I read something similar to this story. In another story,it was stepdaughter calling the biological father, and Op canceled the wedding venue and also the mother stood by Op, and the daughter engagement was called off.
oh yes I'm sure that was his idea. his daughter probably gushed about how the step father had bought her a house and did other caring monetary stuff he probably thought he was made. stupid little girl was coned by bio dad and lost a lot.
Thinking from an Asian standpoint (I've seen this firsthand with my sister's situation), I see it more as: He didn't want to do the hard part of raising her and taking care of her when she was young. Now that she's old enough and able to earn a living, he wants back so that he can take advantage of her.
If the wife ran off with her ex-husband and daughter for 6 months to plan a wedding and honeymoon, they were likely having an affair, but for how many years? The wife had the best of both worlds, a Chad and a simp. She thought she didn't need the simp anymore. Blame the daughter if you want, but the wife seems to have been cheating for years and likely manipulated everything to get her Chad back.
Heard a similar story before but no house gift. Long story short stepdad walked away leaving the so called happy family foot the bill. And stepdad lived happily ever after!
She could have included both fathers. But choose not to.
I’ll bet it was as much down to the Bio dad’s manipulation. I was the same with mine whenever he wandered back into my life again, the craving for acceptance and validation just makes you act irrational. Fortunately I was 13 when I realised it was something I was never going to get, I kept him at arms length for the rest of his life. It’s weird though but as soon as I stopped wanting or needing acceptance the more he seemed to be around but I never trusted him again and took all his promises with a pinch of salt, so was never really upset when he never came through on them.
Good afternoon from Mississippi!!
You handled this awful situation the very best anyone could. You gave your heart to Lily and she betrayed you, your love, your kindness, as well as your wife did. Was she hoping to go back to her ex or something? She should’ve supported you 100%. You were there more for Lily than she was. You handled it all the right way. Lily is not a little girl anymore, but a grown woman. Let her come to you after she figures it all out. You were gifting her a house because of the relationship you had and your love for her. She betrayed that love and trust. Let bio dad buy her the house. You were absolutely right not to give it to her. She should not expect you to. Your wife should take your side because you did nothing wrong but love and take care of Lily. I wouldn’t let the wife come back until she agreed to counseling. They both need to put on their big girl pants and get their heads out of the sand. If you let them back in your life, I would set some ground rules so they don’t hurt you like this ever again. I wish you well and God Bless!
I mean, she could have at least invited him to the wedding, and not have him walk her down the aisle. That still wouldve been bad, but at least better
This was my opinion. There is a big gap between inviting bio-dad to be part of the wedding party and disinviting step-dad altogether. What a little b.
She is not a child.
Her choice her problem
When someone touches a hot stove for the first time, they learn not to touch it the second time
OP will become a Doormat again.
Since OP is thinking about Step-Daughter.
Step-Daughter is an adult, she made her bed and she's going to lay on it.
F-lily! Omg op, you were a dream step dad and the audacity of lily to disrespect the overwhelming luck that her mom found such a wonderful man. Keep the house away and spend it on yourself. Your charity work for the disadvantaged product of a divorce should now be over. Bio-dad only came around long enough to look good at the wedding and get that place of honour, and now it’s over so he has no real interest in the real work, the real commitment.
Im 100% certain the wife was cheating with Tom.
Absolutely!
I agree. There was no other reason for her to stay there for like 2 months or more after the wedding. I understand leaving to stay with the daughter before the wedding. But staying for so long afterwards was weird.
Exactly what I was thinking!
This fool doesn't realize that Sara was most likely with her ex during the separation when she was with the daughter. Hence, "We made a big mistake". Don't take either one back!
I wouldn’t say that for sure that she was but I can’t fault your logic, but she was stuck in the middle of an impossible situation and she took a side. The one she could live with and the one I would expect a parent in this situation to do but I wouldn’t invite her back if it was me even if I knew for sure she wasn’t with the ex.
I wouldn’t say that for sure that she was but I can’t fault your logic, but she was stuck in the middle of an impossible situation and she took a side. The one she could live with and the one I would expect a parent in this situation to do but I wouldn’t invite her back if it was me even if I knew for sure she wasn’t with the ex.
OP is a SIMP to even consider forgiving these lowlife mother daughter duo, who saw OP only as an ATM. OP should cut his losses and focus on his happiness alone. Lily and Sarah are two peas in a pod. Sarah could have knocked some sense to Lily as a mother, reminding her about their past and her deadbeat father, but she didn't do it, which is a clear sign that she was okay with what her daughter was doing.
Oh yes, the mother married him for his resources and this guy doesn’t get it.
I pity daugher a bit (not because of OP's actions). But I wholeheartedly support OP's actions in stopping financial and emotional support. Moreover, I think he is wrong in inviting his wife back, since I believe that daughter wasn't the only one 'reconnecting' in those six months, 'we made a mistake', lol.
OP is so desperate of not being alone is became a doormat
This girl could have both at her wedding. I don’t understand why she is excluding her step-dad. She needs to grow up and have the difficult conversation. Instead she ghosts her step-dad. Sad.
I can't imagine the pain you're feeling after all the love and support you've given; have you asked Lily why she chose not to invite you?
Is this ai story? Op keep on asking if he should let Lily reconnect with the biological father and all the memories stuff. Like just get to the point, what happened next?
Take back the house. Hide your assets and find a good Divorce Lawyer. The wife is in on the whole thing.
All they see OP as is a cash dispenser. The stepdaughter showed her true feelings and how fickle she is, and his wife shows she not a loyal woman. OP is better off without them.
No u did the right thing taking back the house! Her cutting u completely out of her wedding is so petty and wrong! I feel like she only wants u around when it benefits her! And Her bio dad can buy her a house then! My heart goes out to u. But you r truly a real dad and your an amazing man! Never change..
I don’t understand why he s not even invited
Sarah probably slept with her ex as well 😂😂 this guy is so lonely.
Glad I’m not alone in this side*😘theory…..registered with feelings of so much utter common sense & normalcy that I’m having trouble classifying it as an assumption 😑
Absolutely!
The OP's decision to take back the house and not pay for the wedding is totally called for because as the old saying goes:"ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS"and sad to say always will, now Lily needs to realize that her bio dad Tom can't and shouldn't be taken seriously for any reason whatsoever and put him out of her life for absolute good measure and never look back afterwards, and op should also decide to leave both Lily and Sarah behind as well for his own mental health's sake period.
If she couldn't invite my husband to the wedding, I as her mother, will not have been going to the wedding!
I get the whole inviting the biological father to the wedding, but excluding the man who was there for you for the important moments just for the man who basically abandoned you is just petty and cruel. Kudos to the Stepdad for sticking to his guns and making the stepdaughter realize the error of her ways.
His wife moved out for 6 months and did not talk to him for half a year to plan a wedding 🤔, yeahhh she was cheating and left him probably for her ex and when that did not work out she wanted to go back to her back up plan
Lily is free to make her choices for her wedding. That being said, OP is too. He doesn't owe her a thing and altho she shud, she doesn't, this isn't the first reddit story where the child is ungrateful.
You buy me a house, we doing a dad and son dance.
$100 says the wife was having an afair with Tom
Forgiving isn’t the problem. Trusting her again is the problem. Forgiveness is as much for you as it is for her. That angst will eat you up inside if you don’t. Allowing yourself to trust her again however, will take a while. Emotional hurt takes Much, MUCH longer to heal than physical hurt. Those wounds open up on a whim for no reason at all. Take your time and heal or you Both will suffer for it.
This right here is absolutely One of the reasons why men should not get involved with single mothers. He raise that girl for 15 years how did she say thank you by uninviting him to the wedding so that her deadbeat father can come to the wedding I would be done
She easily could have invited both her dads to her wedding. She didnt need to cur off her relationship with you to build one with her biological dad. I'm so sorry your child did this to you. You dont deserve this pain! 😢
Never put all your basket into a kid that isn't blood. My dad learn that the hard way. My mom past away when we (5 kids, me and my bro and sis) were young, and my dad got re-marry, my step mom came with 2 kids, youngest 5 year old (Son), and oldest 12 years old (Daughter). My dad raised them treated them better than us because he wanted to please my step mom, he help them with loans and everything, while he told us to do it ourselves. 15+ years past, my step mom past aways, their kids convince my dad to get us to pay for her funeral, after much disagreement, we did. Then the day after we put my step mom in the grave, both of her kids abandon my dad (they were living under him with their mom), and no contacted him, making him come back to us and he was so sad, one of the last thing he told us "I wish, I wouldn't of threated you all so bad in favor of those good for nothing kids of my wife (step mom)" my dad past away 4 months later, and the good for nothing kids of our stepmom didn't show up or contribute to his funeral.
am i the only one who wished the bio dad would not show up to the wedding ???
How the hell can he feel sorry for lily when she knew exactly what her bio dad was like, in fact everyone knew what he was like. He let her down at every single turn and now she expects him to be there from now on because he apparently changed. I can guarentee in a few years time the bio dad will try and creep back into lilys life, and she will be gullible enough to let him.
It's not as if Lilly had not been disappointed throughout her childhood. I could almost understand, but NOT excuse, her thinking if she had not seen him at all during her childhood either, but she had.
I know plenty of people, since I was a child myself, who said unequivocally that their stepfather or stepmother was their real parent, not the biological one, so there really is no excuse.
Lilly was just too spoiled by having the unconditional love of Op until she just pushed it off the edge of the Earth, so to speak.
I'd be rethinking my marriage to my wife also, because she went along with it. I don't think I could have gone to the wedding if I were her.
It’s not always like that, as you grow up when the bio parent keeps popping in and out your life, you need to validate yourself to prove to yourself it wasn’t you that made them go away. I was fortunate at the age of 13 I realised it was my dad and not me that was the issue but not everyone in that situation is that lucky. All those that hold me up unto that point how he was going to let me down, I hated them and that need for validation just reinforced it.
Dont forgive and dont forget. Tom might reappear again in several years and Lily will do the same. She is a grown up woman, not a little girl - she should know better who is good and who is bad. Its the end of the family
No, !!!! it's very hard to forgive that 💩 let Lily and Sarah find their own way because you don't deserve that
Don’t let yourself be disposable in someone’s life. They will throw you away whenever it’s convenient. It’s time for you to live a life where you matter.
Where is the mother through all of this?
Do not trust her one bit. She may try to get close to you to try to see how she could set you up to get the house and more please keep away from her Do not trust her not one itsybit, plz,plz, plz.
As a father that walk down the aisle is sacred. Now I know several blended families where the Stepfather and Father have both walked the daughter down the aisle. love is fine, never exclude when you can include.
Bye forever Lily, she would never be able to speak to me again. You are not wrong sir.
I don’t know how old this story is…BUT DAMNED MAN YOU CANT REALLY BE TAKING THE WIFE BACK!! Holy Hell Batman (NOT)!!
Your wife is just as much to blame she knew for over a year and said nothing you have two knives sticking in your back.
got me all the way yo the 2nd last line before dropping "i dont know what the future holds" line...
Its amazing Lily has two fathers and neither one of them wants anything to do with her. Tom was always a snake yet they still let him bite them.
I would've took back the house and my money. Not getting an invite is crazy
He better not pay for the extra costs that were accumulated. He can rebuild the relationship, but he better not pay.
Take back the house. And the idea that she's ghosting you is disrespectful.
Considering I can’t find this story anywhere but TikTok and RUclips I’m gonna say that this is a Fat Ai story
Your wife abandoned you and bet she was sleeping with the father of the child for the reason why she actually moved out in the first place. If I was you, I wouldn't take her back but have her get the rest of her things and would of divorced her for leaving in the beginning. Your wife wants you back and to reconcile with her daughter because the bills are piling up and they need your money. You should never marry a woman with another man's kids because they will never love or respect you like the biological father. You did the right thing by taking the house gift back.
One of those times when someone, whom you think you see eye to eye with, tips their hand and you see what they truly think of you.
You go back to that step daughter, and your find out when you need her again, that she throws you away like the last time again. Once they show you who they are, no matter how sad they might be, you let them go. Wait till your in the hospital, she will revert to herself because she has to take care of you and abandon you while your on the Dbed.
The daughter rejected her stepfather as family by her actions. It speaks volumes on how little she deserves Amy sort of forgiveness. For op's wife to leave after everything. The hurt and betrayal op felt. Yet she chose to comfort her daughters bad choice and allowed her to make an obvious mistake. This is all deserved. I'm not op but if I was I would not forgive any of them easily. If even at all. Op deserves soo much better then this.
Nope, Lilly needs to apologize and she needs to make amends to OP. Regardless, she could have allowed her bio father into her life with totally excluding OP, that was silly and unnecessarily.
I see one mistake here. If my partner moved out, there's no way in hell I'd ever invite her back.
The OP should have been more understanding for Lilly wanting to connect with her bio dad. However, Lilly shame on her for just cutting him out like that. For not thinking about every time he was there to pick the piceas up. Sarah shame on her for moving out. That was some bs. She basically said I choose him over you to.
I dont think he wasnt understanding. As a matter of fact he understood quite well.
It was the fact that she COMPLETELY EXCLUDED him on her wedding day. Even if she had asked bio dad to walk her down the aisle is a big slap in the face. The face that he wasnt even invited AT ALL was the point. Not that he didnt understand her wanting to reconnect w dead beat dad
This is why you never get involved with single moms. Ever.
"we are so sorry it was a mistake, after 2 month he had already disappeared again not answering to lily or sarah"
ummm why tf are u in contact with ur ex after moving out of ur house to "just help with lily's wedding prep"
dude it is so obvious she cheated with her ex, planned to leave to rekindle the lost family and then he left again after getting the 🐱 a couple last times.
prove me wrong
No invite-no gift. Easy.
You give a wedding gift when you're invited to the wedding. You're not.
I'm having my own head canon that he divored Sarah later on
Divorce her too, why did she move out just to help plan the wedding? Seems like they all played happy family and now that they've been abandoned again, they want their option B & ATM back in their lives. Get rid of the both of them!
Another cautionary tale to NEVER EVER date or marry a single mother.
I’m so confused, why is the wife acting like she’s Switzerland during all this?!? Pretty sure his wife was fully aware she was in contact with the deadbeat. This is beyond hurtful. They don’t miss him, they realize how much financial security they gave away willingly.
Sarah was complicit. They didnt get her therapy. Lilly will always be drawn to toxic people like her bio dad.. without help.
Update to the story. Sarah was staying with the ex for 6 months behind OPs back and playing happy family while he was abounded. He ended up filing for divorce and will go no contact with both of them. He finally learned to be the type of guy these two girls wanted and deserved lol one that leaves.
I would never trust the wife or the daughter… You'll find yourself a nursing home
I don't see why you would let your wife back after all of her support to Lilly and Tom, none to you. A wife should have her husbands back. It seems to me they are using you for your money.
Its gonna hurt like fire, but that child doesn't deserve your kindess. You did right by her in raising her, but now you have to let her go. Excluding you as if you're not her father is insensitive and cold.
Yeah, I was Lily many moons ago, the need for validation and acceptance can make you act completely irrational, thankfully I realised that the acceptance was never going to come. Thankfully I was only 13 when I worked it out so I never burned my bridges as much as she did.
...Love is not an emotion, its what one said & does in spite of how one feels...
Divorce Sarah and move on.
So daughter back stabed OP, wife left for 6 months, I guess with her ex. Now they want to come back after daddy or mom's ap left again.
If the mom stayed with daughter she must have been with biodad.
By the way that's probably why the real daddy turned back up. He heard she was going to get property. His intentions are obvious.
This is the textbook example of why you never marry single mothers.
Not harsh enough and not petty the girl is a narcissistic
The mom going to the wedding should divorce and be done with both of them
Never date a single mom because of stuff like this
Don’t bite the hand that feeds you.
Lily wants her bills paid
You are doing all the right thing and keep going strong. P.s. sorry ur wife didn't have ur back.
She crawled back because she wanted his money.
They boy want the arm machine back
No doormat your not being harsh, if anything your not being harsh enough.
You don’t split a married couple on a wedding and only invite one of them except if it is a coworker. Then it’s okay
You did great. Hang in there. You did the right thing with both Women. Please don't go back and let them mistreat you again. Either of them sir. 😊
If OP put the house in Lily’s name I doubt he can take it back.
So after he has funded them through the child’s life they both drop him like a hot potato for Tom? Sorry but I would be asking for a divorce, he was nothing but a meal ticket