The Worst NUDE BEACHES in Australia
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- Опубликовано: 15 сен 2024
- REVIEWING GOOGLE REVIEWS.
We're on a mission to find the absolute worst of the most absolutely mundane things on the planet. Let us know what needs Jordan's expert appraisal.
Note: There was a one-off error in sound recording for this video. The sound is NOT coming through the RODE mic.
But because these are Jordan's live reactions we couldn't exactly re-record it. Open wide and eat up.
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Yep, as some of you noticed the RODE mic isn't on in this video. It was a one-off error.
Because these were live reactions it was either bin it or use the camera's audio.
Open wide and eat up.
disappointing
You wore underpants, fake!
@No Drama Llama Ugh yesssss bro!
@No Drama Llama Yeah friendlyjordies plz do it
Come on Jordie, unacceptable. I accept better next time.
I have truly peaked, made it on a
friendlyjordies video
Can I be your friend? I totally would not have asked you an hour ago, but now for some reason, I really wanna be around you.
Lol
I had the same idea, but saw your review already there and said fuck it.
Mate. Your a fucking legend
Welcome to the club champ
Worst train stations in australia
Samuel Maurer +1
I don't nominate a station, but i nominate the section of the gold coast line solely between beenleigh and loganlea
Yes and I’ll add 2, Sunshine train station in Melbourne where someone od’d in the disabled toilet and was only discovered about a week later! And Woodridge TS in Brisbane, Why? Because it’s in Woodridge.
Five of them are Redfern station in Sydney
The entire system in perth
When I found out Jordies wasn't going to get nude.
"My disappointment is immeasurable and my day is ruined"
When I watched the outro:
"I was... pleasantly surprised"
I felt the same thing, thank goodness I waited for the outro!
Yeh but he blurred it out :(
The uncensored version should be up on his OnlyFans pretty soon.
One week this man exposes a national conspiracy and presents a way to fight back, the next week he gives us the worst nudie beaches,
Jordan for PM.
He's got range, darling
he can actually talk like a PM so yeah go jordy
@h. s hahaha wtf
I think worst private schools would be pretty depressing and Karen infested.
I can confirm
All of them are the worst
not all of them
All of them
I'm here for the plot.
⋆Smugly chews popcorn⋆
“Too many guys”
This coming from ONE OF the too many guys...
Yeah, this is the same "You're not stuck in traffic, you ARE traffic" argument that people don't seem to understand.
Worst bars/pubs of Australia
I can bet there will be some quality reviews worth laughing at there. Probably not nude beach good, but still good.
Do "Worst Heritage Railways in Australia" next.
I walked past Lady Bay beach and had a good laugh at all the tourists freaking out why there were nude people on the beach, its right off quite a popular trail.
Mistaking-dugong-for-mermaid shaming.
*0/10*
That made me giggle
Your reply made me giggle
15th century sailors: *nervous sweating*
I was hiking with my family and we took a wrong turn and ended up at the nude beach in Sydney we had to ask people there for directions
My friend lived near Lady's Beach (@9:04) when I was in primary school. We told his dad that we're going for a walk, and he said "ok, but turn back before you get to the nudist beach".
We obviously didn't, and were standing there looking at tits for the first time. When his dad came outta nowhere yelling, and belted his son over the back of head. We both walked home crying.
@@grubbybum3614 best story ever
Can’t believe the mad man stripped down to nothing in this freezing climate
Sad you can see his peach/salmon-coloured undies through the pixelation though 😂
pumacatrun2 how could you expose our great friend Jordan like this, what a betrayal!
The worst centrelink reviews, that should show some real Aussie class 👌🏿
This needs more likes
deadset that would be a legendary vid it needs to happen, some cunt walked into wollongong centrelink n poured petrol all over the carpert but unfortunately didnt light it up :((((( just imagine the skitz shit that happens in cenos across da country
Port Kennedy Nudist Beach... i grew up in Port Kennedy. Ugly part of town that mostly consists of drug abuse and domestic abuse, I could swear the walls of every house were laced with meth. However the saving grace was the dog beach.
It was always empty as of the morning, many childhood mornings were spent taking my dog for a walk there. Armed with a stick and those god-awful headphones that used to come with the early IPhones, those were some of the most peaceful and memorable mornings of my childhood.
Keyword being 'most'...
You see the nudist beach is right next to the dog beach. Often it wasn't a problem, but more often than not did some wrinkly old crone, whom I can only assume went to the nudist beach in hopes of getting laid would wander the forbidden sands. One time, said old crone unknowingly walked past the borders of the nudist beach into the serene sands of my dogs stomping grounds....
An 8 year old me saw something they shouldn't have that day.
I'm pretty sure it's the reason that I'm asexual today...
I want to die
Castration by cognitohazard.
You realise your pic is from the Maslin Beach Nude Olympics (ACTUAL NAME)?
My parents loved to go to them every year and compete.
Fun fact : Mum was smart enough to put joke instructions in clear bags and convinced the deli by the beach to sell them as Maslin Beach Swimwear gag gifts for tourists.
Sold pretty well! 😂
(One wash instruction was something like "Do Not Iron Wrinkled Garment".)
Shazza and Bazza McGillicuddy? Fantastic people, your Dad never did accept my apologies about the 2005 debacle though. Send my best.
It's now called Nude Games instead of Olympics because the Australian Olympic Committee threatened legal action over the use of the word Olympics. As if this small annual event is a threat to the fucking Olympic Games. Haha still salty about this even though it happened years ago. My parents run the event now so I help out a bit. It's a lot of fun.
@@fodel3758 Well that's bullshit. It's well known Steve Hooker's passion for pole vaulting started at the Nude Games. What's un-Olympic about that? There's no way de Castella would have forged through the runs in the Commonwealth Games, if he hadn't put the hard work in on the loosely packed sands at Maslins. It is a breeding ground for future champs.
so when're you uploading the uncensored version to onlyfans?
He's gonna do beach reviews on Twitch. "Just Chatting".
Some public toilets do actually scar you for life ~ can’t go back in there just in case it’s as bad as it was
Not the first time I've had to tell someone I watch this channel for the articles.
That’s weird, I thought my dad hated going to the beach.
Nothing to report from the Queeenslander section of the country. So much potential and all missed.
Jordies please do a vid on that allergy/excema kid at school (you know the one) that always smelt like old yoghurt and fingers
_old yoghurt and fingers_
Oh yep, I remember that kid
Ur forgetting the vomit powder sand. everyone who went to a cheapskate school can relate
@Quentin Lennox then you've clearly been overlooking his videos about grade school
Quentin Lennox but low hanging fruit make me go ha ha
@Quentin Lennox poking fun at the bacholerette, primary school camp culture, 'aunty shelly' stereotype are all low hanging fruit - did those jordies skits/videos bother you ? genuinely curious
"and a lubricant" hahaha this channel always has the best comedic content hahahaha - do dog parks, tattoo parlour public bathrooms or fun parks
He actually did it. Let’s goooooo
The animations are getting better each time, jordy must be on that serious bank now
Random Perv on a Nude Beach: Unofficial mascot for Jordies' fan-base
"maby he was trying to reenact finding Nemo" 'Mate' i almost fell of my chair laughing at that one Bravo!
"Beware of snakes"
If you really want to go deep you can go to the "Worst Brothels in Australia" and earn your stripes.
Growing up in the suburb of Port Kennedy this beach is a pivotal factor to the local high school's attendance issues
Can u do a review on private schools in Australia?
Actually, lets do the reverse, since private schools get all the cash and the attention. Worst public schools in Australia.
Also, Maslins doesn't really count. It's a HALF NUDE, HALF CLOTHED beach.
The half closer to the stairs is CLOTHED, but once you reach the far point, you NEED to strip.
When "you love something that's unpleasant" then that's drug and porn addiction in a nutshell.
That Sea Snake Joke Got Me!!! XD hahahahahahahaah
“Dude, this party is a nudist beach” this has to become a thing
Haha nice. I was raised by nudists and have visited a bunch of clubs around SA and I have to point out that 95% of the nudist community do NOT condone public acts of sex or of a sexual nature. So if you're thinking of rocking up to any clubs or venues with those intentions you'll soon find yourself kicked out.
coming from jordan's second channel i didn't even notice how shit the mic was until someone pointed it out HAHA
I’ve never been more excited in my life
The worst public toilet I've ever seen was the one in the centre of Cairns' nightclub district. Just a little building between the left and right lanes of the road, directly outside the sloppiest nightclub ($1 drinks on Thursdays) that eventually got fined out of existence for serving minors and breaching the restrictions of their cabaret license for wet T shirt competitions. The public toilet served solely as a place for people who got kicked out of the club to urinate, and most of them chose to do it on the outside of the building rather than risk the toxic clouds within.
I read "dissaponting" and thought that's overly harsh to one of Australia's better cricket captains, not his fault he's from Tassie.
do a vid on eshays
Good idea
Back when I was in school, we went to a beach for an excursion. Can't remember what the excursion was for. Doesn't matter regardless because we weren't there for long - Turns out it was a nude beach and we all experienced it firsthand when a middle-aged naked couple jogged right past.
At the Rendezvous Hotel in Melbourne there are two sinks in the ground floor men's room, one lower for persons in wheelchairs, one higher for persons not in wheelchairs. The taller one has an entire raw chicken impaled on the tap. I got sick after lapping up the water that oozed out from the chicken's pores.
"My little exotic bird" Fucking lost it. Roflcopter
Never before have I felt compelled to like a video so much. There was an asbolute ripper public toilet near Alice Springs, literal tiled hole in the gound, like a portal to shitty hell.
a couple of ideas for the next part to this series, either "Worst public toilets" or "Worst Shopping Centres"
"the hole cut into the stall door & walls is a bit disconcerting..or exciting depends on my mood really 3 stars" ~friendlyjordies
What about Birdie?!? Ya can’t do a nudie beach “worsts” video without including ol’ Birdie Beach. My sister & I went there once & bravely stripped down. We actually had an excellent time. Met a lovely couple who were clearly regulars (no tan lines) & they said to let ‘em know if we had any troubles. Saw an old dude with a tasteful cock ring. Got super bad sun burn on my tits though.. they’d never seen the light of day since I was a kid.. 🤷🏼♀️ had to get special burns cream from my GP😢 & put frozen peas down my shirt for a while. Apart from the burns, the experience was awesome. We only called it a day after this bloke came up for a chat with us.. just casually standing with his hands on his hips, tryna make small talk ~which would’ve been fine had we not been sitting on towels in the sun at an uncomfortable, direct eye to cock level. Yeah.. that was a bit too real. We packed our shit up & left. Good day but. Would for sure go back. Yes.. it’s mostly old naked dudes. Get over it & let them tan their bits. ✌🏽
Me and my friend went to Obelisk beach once and as we were walking down a man who was leaving said to us “watch out there’s a bunch of European men masturbating down there” we thought he was joking... as soon as we got to the top of the stairs the whole beach was crowded with men who I kid you not, simultaneously looked up at once as if that scene at the nudist beach in Euro Trip had come to life
2/5 stars
The worst public dunnies is the review this country needs. I recommend you start with Parliament House, no one has even tried to clean up that shit since '07.
6:35 I had just taking a big mouthful of tea. Took everything to not spit it over my laptop and paperwork. Brought actual tears to my eyes. Dear Lord!! 😂😂😂
So I watched this to almost the end and thought "how disappointing, Jords didnt get nekid! day ruined...so just as I was about to close the window at the credits... something caught my eye! You never disappoint!!!! now is there an uncensored version as Id like to be a PERV thanks!
When will Jordies open his OnlyFans? We're waiting.
I hate how THE FIRST nudist beach to come up in this video is a literal ten-minute drive down the coastline from where I grew up.
9:30 must have cost some major patrion dollars for that special effect.....worth it 🤣
Watching this at 1:30am in my time zone because i think if i go to sleep it'll have been deleted by the time i get up
WE DID IT BOYS
That’s right I AM ur biggest fan so ok
I got so surprised when I got to the 2:43 mark as I live in Port Kennedy and never knew there was a nudist beach here. XD Then again I've only lived here for 6 years XD
12:15 I DEMAND AN UNCENSORED VERSION.
1 maslins, yes!
2 great things happened in SA this month,
No rona and maslins gets put on jordies!
7:52 made the mistake of having a drink at this point in the video
I live literally 20 meters from one of these beaches and it is truly a local icon
Nothing to me will ever top the old Frankston toilets out front of the station that where a place to shoot up and smelt so strongly of piss and shit, you could smell it from down the street.
Frankly, the problem with Maslins is the fecking stairs of doom to get to it, if you don't want to use the civvies carpark. And the bloody wasps hanging around the showers and taps.
11:00 Thumbs up for the Worst public toilets in Australia for your next video! I have 2 - the toilets and shower block at Curtain Springs, N.T. In 1998, whilst planning a road trip around Australia with my 2 Primary School age sons, a friend WARNED me about the toilets at Curtain Springs. He had done the 'round Australia road trip with kids, and he observed that Curtain Springs was the worst in his experience. When we got there in 2001, on my feet, I wore my PLATFORM THONGS into the shower and rinsed them in bleach afterwards. Whilst on my trip, my sons WOULD NOT ALLOW ME to go to the toilets at Barrow Creek Pub. They physically dragged me away, encouraging me to take a leak by the road side a few kilometres away! Had to leave that one to my imagination after they didn't have anything negative to say about Curtain Springs toilets ! lol
Need to do worst libraries in Australia or suburbs, or shopping centers. Just keep it going, you get the idea.
Ps, no word of a lie, my ex was a bit of an exhibitionist you might say, didn't mind getting the kit off, me on the other hand was thinking oh f no, when she mentioned to go to a nude beach not far from shallow bay/ forster area. We went she kitted off like it was nothing took me about an hour to fully commit after I finally saw another young couple about 50m to the left instead of kneecap titties and thigh smacking nutsacks from the oldies. All was good and well for about 30 mins although I was still pretty uncomfortable then out of nowhere about 4 families with children from the age of about 3 - 10 walked past us disturbingly close as they got off the wrong track and had to walk through us all to go to the clothed beach a couple hundred metres to the right (who does that!?! Turn around ffs!) i can't not remember these kids faces staring in absolute confused disgust at us, that's when I was like nah fk this dodgy shit , left feeling disgusted and burnt my balls aswell. 1/10 do not recommend.
cmon aus's worst public toilet has to be the one from Round the twist, haunted by... clearly a dead junky.
i live like 1 km from the #4 one in syd, there is a walk there kids take and they can openly look down onto the nudists
If you want to mention the best restroom in Australia it's the rest stop in dunedoo. It plays fucking music and talks to you, there's a timer for the lock so you gotta be a bit fast. It fucking thanks you when you leave! Most polite toilet ever.
I've been to the nudist beach at La Perouse in Sydney many times and love it there. It's usually very peaceful if you get the right spot. Yes you might have to go off the sand and take a hike onto the rock area but well worth it.
Gays: exist
Straight men: AAAAHHH MY MASCULINITY!
As a (mostly) gay male, there's a lot of misbehaving gays, especially when they get into the geriatric end of the spectrum. Homosexuality shouldn't be conflated with being a horny, exhibitionist slut, but as this video proves there's no shortage of them. Would be afraid of getting ogled and/or diddled at one of these beaches.
@@higgsbonbon I feel like you're imposing straight patriarchical values where they needn't be. There should be outdoor venues for sex. A nudist beach is hardly in your face.
@@aussietom85 bruh
Worst councils of smaller cities and towns in Australia.
I'll nominate Ballarat, my hometown where I was born and raised. They constantly rip up old infrastructure that has a clear future use for stupid shit like golf courses, they blatantly refuse to do what the locals actually want and to top it off, there was recently a report uncovering huge amounts of corruption.
Google reviews for Australian malls when?
"wHaT aRe YoU jAcKiNg OfF tO" made my day, thanks
The Best nude beach is the one where Jordie goes
Much indeed
So lady bay
When I used to live in Sydney I loved going to La Perouse but I always went to the end of the beach (closer to the port behind the wall) AND WTF I NEVER KNEW THERE WERE NUDISTS THERE-
5:32 trip type: travelled with friends...
Worst public toiliet - Mens restroom in Engadine Maccas. They still haven't removed Scomo's funk from the tile grout.
Someone took a shit in the hallway and elevator of my sisters apartment, it got everywhere somehow and still had a faint bleach/shit smell for months after
Word on the street is that a BBQ on a nude beach it's highly likely all the sausages smell like shit.
Crazy right. Non stop cray. Ferries go by there... friends remind you - nude beach. PTSD to when you mother showed you one with your father powerless behind, in South Australia though.
“The worst public toilets in Australia” My primary school toilet: TWO STARS someone clogged the sink with toilet paper and pissed in it. Still better than the girl’s bathroom, surprisingly someone shit in the sink and smeared it on the mirror in there they ALSO shit on the ceiling
curious as to whether you just use the MIA soundtrack cus it's good music or if you've actually watched the show, if so, didja like it?
I chortled to myself when I saw Maslin Beach pop up as number 1 in this video...I remember watching a quirky Australian film, some 20 odd years ago about this very beach, titled (appropriately enough): Maslin Beach.
Video starts at 12:10
Jordies referring to great white sharks as white pointers is like an old Australian man referring to Uluṟu as Ayer’s Rock
All these beaches need a reenactment of Taxi Driver
That needle made me cringe! People getting naked on a beach is one thing.. but leaving dirty needles is a biological hazard! Some people are f***ing disgusting! 🤢🤮
Just a suggestion for if you do actually do worst public toilets in Australia. Though it is technically not actually a public toilet and has likely been fixed here is a lovely story of why you don't fuck with the meme page of high school teenagers. There is a rather iconic Facebook group known as the vce discussion space, it basically serves as a meme hive mind for vce students across the state to rip into vcal kids, complain about shit completely unrelated to vce and kids putting up like 5 Facebook polls a day around the time English student have to do oral presentations. Anyway about 2 years ago the page got hit with copy right claims by an at the time unknown company, given this is the internet and there's no way it was gonna be dead for long and a new page was created and the company responsible for bringing down the old page was exposed as TSFX (the school for excellence) who are some crappy vce tutoring and study resources company. But if you ever remember the calmer coffee incident where vce students absolutely obliterated the reviews of some Melbourne cafe because it's name appeared in the English exam, teenagers know how to fuck up a company online reputation. Within about 10 minutes of the reveal TSFX bought the page down over copyright claims for resources the some kid had chucked up there 3 years prior that they just happened to own an army of pissed of students took out their frustrations. During that time if you googled there name you could find of course the most tanked reviews possible numbering I believe around the 5 digit mark along with that their head office had been reclassified as a public toilet and all the images replaced with about as manky of a public restroom as you could imagine, so yeah technically not actually a public toilet but it probably holds the record for worst reviewed public toilet so I think it would deserve a shout out if you actually did the worst public toilets in Australia
WORST PUBLIC TOILETS NOW
Germans love nudist beaches, especially east germans. They call it Freikörperkultur (free body culture).
My mum used to take me to Maslins as a kid, before camera phones were a thing so I don't ever remember seeing people taking creepy photos. She used to rush us off once it started getting dark, so I asked her why once and she clarified for me that it basically just turns into a big gay orgy after dark.
Only ever saw one or two dudes having a wank. Can conform is it a beautiful beach with soft sand and gentle waves, not good enough for surfing but good enough for body surfing and just having a good time and somehow all the fun waves are in the nudist section of the beach only.
if you're nude at a beach you're going to be rubbing your gear all the time.
I love watching friendly Jordie’s because he tells completely relatable stories and brings back childhood memories
Better late than never, but you missed Cobblers Beach on the North side of Middle Head! 😅
"Looking for small exotic native birds"
Sure...........................
I know it’s the opposite of the worst but the public bathroom opposite the submarine in Holbrook gets surprisingly good ratings, surprisingly especially because when I was there there was a guy throwing up in the stall at 2pm in the afternoon.
Jordan's Corona Hair is looking full and luscious: 5 stars
12:17 if u want to be entertained
i surfed at swanourne beach last week, a current took me too far north into the nudist area. god forbid what i saw...
Lots of old guys?
YabbilyDoobily 0 women
I have your winner for worst public toilet- Echuca I have the video proof too... it was ...the worst thing I have ever seen