"No One Likes A Mad Woman" Gender, Disability, and Narrative in Life is Strange: Before the Storm
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- Опубликовано: 3 окт 2024
- In my very first official video essay, I discuss how Chloe's experiences of being a Disabled woman, particularly a neurodivergent or mad woman, shape the narrative of this game as well as the narratives people tell and believe about her and how she challenges those narratives through the power of speaking up. I also discuss how she relates to Sera and how their shared mad woman statuses are significant regarding how Chloe can either re-enforce or challenge the toxic ableist narrative surrounding Sera.
The Price of Life: Disability, Gender and Agency by Gameassist • The Price of Life | Di...
TikTok Gave Me Autism: The Politics of Self Diagnosis by Alexander Avila • TikTok Gave Me Autism:...
Resources (in no particular order):
• The Real Housewives of... The Real Housewives of Vancouver clip
• National Harm Reductio... National Harm Reduction Coalition clip
• Scott Pilgrim vs The W... Scott Pilgram vs. the World clips
• Garden State (1/5) Mov... Garden State movie clip
• Eternal Sunshine of th... Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind clip
• Kirsten Dunst & Orland... Elizabethtown clip
• You Do/You Don't Want ... Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Season 3 Theme Song
• Garden State (2004) Tr... Garden State Trailer
• Everything's Gonna Be ... Everything's Gonna Be Ok Official trailer
harmreduction.... Harm Reduction Coalition site
www.bccdc.ca/ou... Harm Reduction Services CDC site
towardtheheart... Naloxane information site
www.acmi.net.a... The Hays Code definition
www150.statcan... Statistics on Violence towards Canadians with Mental Health- related Disabilities
www.merriam-we... Ableism Definition
www.theatlanti... The Hidden Link Between Autism and Addiction
www.nimh.nih.g... Borderline Personality Disorder definition
press.umich.ed... Mad at School by Margret Price
Songs used in video:
The Right Way Around 1:15
Glass 6:04
Improve 9:57
Departure 11:49
I Can't Live Here Anymore: 14:55
Improve 20:57
Dreams of William 22:57
A Hole in the Earth Instrumental 25:03
Flaws 28:58
The Right Way Around 31:44
I Can't Live Here Anymore 35:37
Witches 40:33
Improve 45:08
Flaws 48:06
I Can't Live Here Anymore 51:54
Witches 101:21
Dreams of William 104:17
Flaws 106:41
Glass 109:11
Hope 113:19
A Hole in the Earth 117:13
Hope 118:37
Thinking about how people talk about Chloe, then looking at the things she says about herself in the end of the first game, the last choice... seems she's repeating what she always heard.
She comes to the conclusion that the world is better of if she died, and what's worse, the universe confirms her horrible thoughts.
You as max could either let that be, or tell her that YOU wouldn't be better off if she was dead. To have one person who actually cares.
A life is strange essay in 2024??? Hell yeah I'm here for it
Life is Strange, and Chloe Price in particular, was a pivotal point in my life when I played the first game at age 16. I'd never felt so seen, so represented by a fictional character before, and I think she influences my fashion sense to this day haha. Thank you so much for making this essay on my favourite girl
Incredible video essay. Life is strange it has been with me for nearly a decade now, and it played a major role in my own self discovery as a neurodivergent and sapphic person.
I’m so glad someone finally touched on Joyce. I never liked her(more or less because she reminds me or my own mother.) The fandom and even the game devs mischaracterize her as some girlboss single mother when that’s not what she is.
In case you didn’t know, Before the storm takes place only two years after William’s death. In the first game, it’s actually confirmed that Joyce met David only MONTHS after William died.
Chloe hadn’t even really begun the grieving process when David was introduced as some kind of replacement in her life and for Joyce to tell her to move on is insane.
Joyce never made any move to help or reform her child and nobody acknowledges that. Even people who defend Chloe say that Chloe should’ve treated Joyce better when it was really the other way around. It’s rare for a child to “mistreat” or lash out against their parent for no reason.
Joyce, in my opinion, was an awful mother.
Funny that ppl who like and defend Chloe actively "stan" Joyce. I strongly dislike Chloe, and I also find Joyce's behavior inappropriate, unfair, and reckless. She should be ashamed. She really should.
@@spider-woman9482 I think that’s it’s because people tend to be sympathetic towards single mothers and disregard their wrongdoings because “they work so hard” for their kid.
I don't think Joyce was a good mother, but I don't think she is a bad person. Just very ill equipped for dealing with loss AND a grieving daughter, as well as being single handedly responsible for keeping it together financially. Joyce could've done a lot better, no doubt and she is very much responsible for that. But she did have a lot on her shoulders all alone until she had David, who did help lift some burden off of her but definitely came with his own set of problems. My stance is that Joyce made a lot of mistakes and should be held accountable for it, but she shouldn't be hated for it either
I ADORE this entire essay. I’ve felt these ways too about the first two games specifically since I too first played them around ages 18-20. I was Max’s age when I first played the game too, and she turned 18 like two or so years after I did, so I felt really truly seen by Max, Chloe, AND Rachel. In their mental illnesses, in their neurodivergences, in their queerness. In so much about them. Thank you for making this video. I need to replay these games again soon, because it’s been too long since I have. 💖💖💖
I played life is strange before I got my BPD diagnosis and I related to Chloe in such a way that I couldn't even understand. I thought it was because I liked angry girls with blue hair
I haven't watched the whole video yet, but I'm SO SO SO happy that you also see Chloe as neurodivergent (I hc her as autistic with bpd) bc I love Chloe dearly and LIS is my special interest since 2015 and she's my biggest kin. The comics also explore her, Max and Rachel if you want to give it a go, they are really worth it!!!
She definitely isnt autistic. Not everyone is. BPD is way more fitting
@@ninak5645I think she could be autistic, but to each their own yk
@@ninak5645 yeah she has lots of traits of bpd but I HC her as autistic. She doesn't have to be autistic coded for me to hc her as autistic. I hc her as autistic bc I am autistic and I deeply relate to her in many ways + she has some autistic traits, which could be caused by bpd/ other forms of neurodiversity. That's all!
I feel like more men would get diagnosed with bpd if they saw a therapist imo.
Haha! I feel you with the confusion between ableism and disablism. As I understand it, ableism is "unconscious discrimination," and disablism is "conscious discrimination" or more direct discrimination. For example, ableism is a building designed without a ramp or a lift for people who need it. It's not like the people who designed the building hated disabled people; they did not take their needs into consideration, most probably because they were not aware of their needs. Disablism, on the other hand, is the belief that people with disability are in some way "worse" or "less capable" than people without disability, so the discrimination is much more direct (for example, a job advertisement with a line that "people with disabilities are not welcome to apply for the job.") However, disablism is very common in subtle ways like people talking down to people with disability and underestimating their intellect (for example employers giving you "easy" job even though you have PhD. - this happened to my friend, btw. She has a PhD. in social sciences, but some employers treated her like she couldn't even understand basic tasks because of her AuDHD symptoms). Don't get me wrong, this is a huge simplification. Both ableism and disablism are more nuanced than I have described, but these examples helped me better distinguish these two terms.
Man this made me cry its all too real, great video!
W pfp, another neurodivergent king
This is amazing. I first played the game when I was around 9, or 10, (gen z eeeewww) and at the time I was just beginning to show symptoms of BPD, and I have always been a “bad child” due to being undiagnosed autistic. Her character along with max really resonated with me, because I have I am similar to both of them in so many ways. I especially began resonating with them as I grew up and gained a friend with the same issues that I had a sort of Max & Chloe dynamic with. This video speaks to exactly why she does, and it puts it into words so perfectly. It’s a wonderful video, good visuals, good script and voicing, along with very nice background music. Good job! Please make more in the future I’d love to see them :)
Thanks so much! I definitely plan on making more video essays.
i just revisited life is strange this year for the first time since i was like 15 and for a second i thought i was going crazy bc i could not for the life of me remember or understand why i or anybody else was ever a chloe hater as she's easily my favorite part of these games now. thanks for putting everything i was thinking into words; i thought i was just being sensitive or i wasn't thinking hard enough or something but i realize now that the reason behind chloe being so controversial really just boils down to usual suspects as it relates to complex female characters: ableism and misogyny. appreciate this video for pointing out and explaining it in such detail 🙏
(also the audhd addiction stat is CRAZY, didn't know the odds were that stacked against us 💀 my dad's an addict so i knew i was at some level of disadvantage but 8 times more likely is nuts, imma keep fighting tho)
Thank you 💜And yeah you should keep fighting! I know I am.
I really wish we got to see James or Sera after Rachel disappeared and then when they find out she was murdered
You know... As someone myself who suspects I am on the spectrum of ADHD and autism... Your essay is very compelling. This coming from someone who was mostly indifferent and dismissive of Chloe's character flaws, you've actually made me a lot more sympathetic to her character. (... Though I personally would still pick the "Sacrifice" ending from an egalitarian standpoint). Your points you are diving into are REALLY hitting home personally for my interactions with the world. In terms of school, I absolutely loved school in my early primary years. However, I can pinpoint I started to gain a bit of boredom and lack of enthusiasm as school work became more rudimentary close to middle school. Even in college, my easiest class I had was my general computers class. The class made me aware that what I thought was common knowledge interacting with computers was not for the average person in my class. My experience was absolutely insulated due to my brother's proficiency with computers. I was even teaching the professor shortcuts she wasn't aware of. It however ended up being one of my lower grades of the semester because I was so bored and missed doing a couple of assignments on time. Absolutely was not a representation of my proficiency. Between my brother and me, I was always regarded as the scholar and "good student." I completed my initial university run as it was the "thing to do," but ended up with a degree that I too late realized I actually wasn't passionate about in terms of a career because the options would involve people a lot more than I am generally comfortable with (AKA masking + socializing). I was simply only passionate about the information. Product of my hard-headed fixation to finish things I start. School was simply a major identity for me.
In regards to experiences with men, It seems like most guys are often intrigued by my appearance first. Then my mystery (I am very introverted) or eccentric interests until they actually get to talk to me and then become almost... distant once they see the real human honestly. I am someone that likes to take care of my appearance in a femme representing way, but have always paradoxically been very tomboyish. However, I am self-aware enough to know I am conventionally attractive for a woman. But surprisingly enough, I'm not someone who particularly likes intense sexual male attention generally. (I identify close to the ace spectrum of sexuality). This sometimes even makes me wary about engaging men platonically in certain circumstances for fear of being read incorrectly. In fact, I think it's unnerving to a lot of guys when I talk to them normally even when I get a sense they're attracted to me. However more often than not, the attraction is not reciprocated on my end. It especially takes me a while to feel comfortable around people in general to remove the mask and be wholly "organic." I've felt the backlash of that of guys taking it personally when I'm not even rude. Most recently, a guy that tried to flirt with me via DMs posted about feeling his self-esteem be low bc I wasn't physically attracted to him (which he asked). Mind you, he made his whole premise of trying to talk to me that he wanted to be "friends" either way. How much do you want to bet he has interacted with me since then? Lol. I pretty much suspected he was only interacting with me because he found me attractive because I have my DM interaction settings limited and from investigating his post interactions. However, I absolutely hesitated to reply early on that I wasn't interested in flirting/e-relationships as it could come across as "jumping the gun," so to speak or slighted against me even as vain arrogance. Not too long after that interaction died, he posted complaining about "having his time wasted" and the hoopla about people not being invested in relationships. He would also post blatantly contrarian takes to posts I particularly interacted with which left a sour taste to me as I was never rude in my rejection. I did not approach him with any general social interest in the first place, so - in my head - the onus of effort was never in my court. I simply followed him back as we shared similar interests and I liked his sense of humor and I would have been okay maintaining a platonic rapport. However, he didn't seem interested in that, so I didn't push the issue for any sort of social relationship; especially where It can be weird for folks that feel rejected.
It's kind of ironic that I think about it because on the opposite end a bisexual women (that is also neurodivergent) messaged me a couple of years ago hoping I was possibly into women. Even though I turned her down as I'm straight, we've been social mutuals for years and we regularly interact on very friendly terms. She didn't take my rejection as a bruise on her ego or anything personal about her not being good enough. She's someone that exhibits a very healthy view about rejection.
three years ago, after i've seen uricksaladbar's video on cloe i had a strong bias against her character and thought of the Lis series as mediocre or even generally bad games.. i'm glad to have stumbled over this analysis now. lots to think about in retrospect- not just about the game but also my own upbringing. i think i masked too well and was angry at cloe for not being able to 'just' do the same. it’s a vicious cycle.
haven’t watched it yet but it truly is a testament to the impact this game has had, both in and out of the gaming world, that in the year of our lord 2024 people still are talking about life is strange lol. so excited to watch :) this series has always been dear to my heart
this really hit close to home, thank you so much for making this. I'm the same age as Chloe was in BTS. I feel like I've developed a whole new understanding of myself and my neurodivergence as well!!
This is beautiful, I love seeing people like me (autistic) who also act/think like me :D love this video sm
😅😅😅
One of the things that always irritated me after playing LiS and getting into the community was realizing that when I saved Chloe, the actual ending was that everyone else died. I guess that was a context issue with my own neurodivergence, but my logic was "well, tornadoes and hurricanes happen all the time and people survive. We just won't know who." And they didn't try to look for anyone, they just drove off. If her truck was able to remain and still function, I think it's highly possible there were survivors, we just ran away. But no. Canon was, entire town wiped out. I'm still pissed about it and choose to believe my own head canon instead. No I didn't play the second game (with the brothers). Like I get it was about making a sacrifice, but it phrases it like you're sacrificing the town, not doing a mini-genocide. I stand by my choice though.
I think it's been confirmed by dontnod that there were survivors, and David does show up in LIS2 to confirm this. But yeah a lot of people still die.
It still isn't a "mini-genocide". Max doesn't kill the people, the tornado does. And I don't care if it was caused by her or her time powers. The tornado is neither her fault nor her responsibility. She didn't ask for it to happen, nor did she ask to have any powers. In fact the vision of the tornado appeared before Max ever used her powers. I get the urge to try to help, but letting Chloe die is something way more active than letting the tornado wipe out the town. I also don't think it's fair that Chloe is punished for something she had no control over. I don't think that was you missing any context, "tornadoes and hurricanes happen all the time and people survive, we just won't know who" is spot on
@@alexelion7084 Exactly 100% I agree
Absolute banger of a video essay 🦋 I'm not completely sure what my feelings about Chloe were back when I played the first LiS game (though she def influenced me fashion-wise, and I had blue hair at some point too!); but Game Assist def helped me appreciate her even more. And you reaffirmed that! I love how "biased and personal" this video is. And it's true there's no such thing as a completely unbiased opinion but even if there were, that sounds incredibly boring. It's amazing seeing how much you care about the characters
Thank you so much! That means a lot to me. Seriously.
Also sorry for all the comments but I wanted to thank you for this, I'm a gender-questioning maybe-woman been having a really rough time lately with a lot of academic issues that I think are tied to my neurodiversity and videos like these feel so perfect and fitting.
I will say, having Chloe challenge Rachel's father on how he treated Sera is a decent criticism
However, my read on the situation is that despite Chloe's general willingness to call out alleged authority figures she is
1) talking to a DA - an authority figure in a league she might not be used to
2) talking to the father of someone she likes and is trying to "behave" around
3) realistically I'd argue she might be overwhelmed and still taking in the new situation, especially since we consider the neurodivergency argument seriously (girl literally was dropped into a play like... One or two hours ago. That's overwhelming af)
4) and also a teen. Teens still aren't supposed to feel the big feelings for adults or correct their personal failings. Though admittedly, as someone who isn't a teen anymore but respects my fellow people - the youth is always a good warning signal for societal failures. As are neurodivergent people. And any kind of minorities. Literal canaries in a mine.
Anyway. I'm starting to ramble.
Admittedly it's been a while since I played the games. But I would understand how someone like Chloe might not say something "in-character" if you will in this perticular type of situation.
Have you ever felt like you enter a room, and you make it worse for everyone in that room, just by talking? I still talk, a lot. But I still hurt a lot. It's what I've seen.
i have audhd and same here. :( took me 19 years but i finally found a friend who accepts me and never gets annoyed or irritated when i talk. i’m 22 now and she’s 28 and loves me like a little sister which is something i’ve never had before. i also have a few other queer and neurodivergent friends too now. so don’t change anything about yourself because one day it WILL lead you to finding your people. with them i never have those kinds of worries anymore and i promise those people are out there for you too 🩷 they say that neurodivergent people flock to one another and i’m definitely a believer of that.
@cherrynoodles5516 Yeah, I get that. It just feels good to actually talk about what I've been feeling, or type it at least.
I do know it's possible to not feel that. I haven't got that yet, it sucks. But I'm not hopeless.
thank you so much for this video.
actually seeing chloe as a neurodivergent, hurt and barely coping girl in a world full of inescapable ableism & misogyny... helps a lot.
i feel i understand her better, and other teens who lash out, hate authority. i hate authority too and only recently stopped to appease and fit into this Socially Acceptable Mold.
it helps to see her story to accept mine, to comfort my inner angry teen that feels the world is endlessly unfair. because it is.
it helps to reflect on how i treat other nd, insane or stressed folks.
thank you again.
This fucking gutted me.
No character has ever meant to me what Chloe does, and nothing has ever quite put into words why that is, so well.
This video made me feel seen... so much so I cried a little bit listening to the video.
1:03:45 i don't want to be mean or anything, but it is important to remember that Chloe is a minor and so is Rachel, AND that Rachel's father already doesn't like Chloe. There is conflict in asking that Chloe pushes back against James' rhetoric and to her it might not even really be an option. Just because she connects to Sera's condition, doesn't mean that she, a teenager, might even be able to fully recognize the usage of the rhetoric used against her being used on another woman. Not saying that i disagree with the he desire for there to be q choice, it is definitely not out of character for her to push back against authority hard, it's just that maybe as a character choice, she just didn't think about it or didn't really consider it to be an option she could have in her position. Say she did confront him harder, it would mean that James has an even BIGGER reason not to like her because she could catalyze the one thing that he absolutely doesn't want. He would have paid her off or sent someone to threaten Chloe the same way he did to Rachel's bio mom.
I'm not saying you're wrong for thinking that btw !! You are allowed to have problems with narratives and question their validity !! That is what media critique is for! I just wanted to provide my thoughts to add onto the conversation^^
Yeah I definitely get that, and I do say in the video that I might just be biased. I think my feelings are more about wanting to yell at James in that moment.
@@lostinfaerie06 I totally get that and I feel like I was not seventeen long ago and as someone who does have a whole bunch of stuff going on mentally, I don't think I would have felt the ability to push back against James. He is a man who has a great amount of power over her, and a way to bargain with her (ultimately another way of dehumanizing his daughter is that he is the kind of person that would choose the kind of friends she could keep without her knowing), unlike most of the points where her voice has power, this is not one where she can really speak up and win the situation or even think about speaking up. As someone who was always the friend people didn't want their kids around, I would understand why Chloe could feel like this is the one person she can't fuck up in front of.
I don't blame you obviously for making an argument!! There is nothing wrong with proposing an argument that she should have done something! I just relate to her powerlessness more closely as someone who still experienced that powerlessness of being a kid so clearly. I really have regrets in my own way of not pushing back against people!! But it is the acknowledgement that I was a kid at the end of the day, that does help me push through the same of not helping myself.
This. Was. INCREDIBLE. Truly remarkable, you made something extremely powerful here.
My first play through of LiS1, I hated Chloe, her abrasiveness really got to me. Then Before the Storm came out, and I was also a bit older and more mature, and my feelings on Chloe completely changed. When I was able to play *as* Chloe, to get inside her head rather than just react to her behavior I began to understand who she was better and *why* she is that way. It touched me deeply, and completely changed the way I looked at Life is Strange 1.
Im so happy to see a life is strange video essay; this is a beautiful and really wonderful video essay; I dont think ive seen anyone go in such depth and interest into the themes and narratives that lie within LiS; I actually cried watching this. LiS has always meant a lot to me and been close to my heart, especially being neurodivergent and queer; this video encapsulates to much so well. Really well done...
i havent played life is strange but i loved this video essay so much, ill definitely check it out after this !!
My mission is complete lol
Hey, this really video was good and really necessary, was poignant and insightful I cried; I'd write more but I would end up taking 2 hours wiring a hyperfixated, neurodivergemt chaos agent, essay post. As fun as that would be, knowing me I'd like evd up like forgetting to eat or something , so I'm gunna stop it here.
It was great❤
Rachel's mom and dad seem to reflect Chloe and Elliot. A dark what if.
That's a really interesting point
This is essential viewing for anyone who is a fan of this game.
Beautiful video! I do want to note that the background music was a bit loud at times, which made it difficult for me to personally to figure out what you were saying, but on the whole I think I was able to figure it out pretty well and it was pretty good.
Yeah someone else commented that as well. It's difficult to find the balance between to loud and too soft but I'll keep working on it.
Yeah, the idea of a Black student getting preferential treatment over white students in any kind of major school incident is probably one of The most implausible things about this game tbh, no matter what other factors of class/gender/disability are involved. I feel like lis2 handles it a lot better, or at least more realistically--the Diaz brothers are autistic (source: I'm autistic and I've seen some very convincing evidence compilations on Tumblr) and they confront a lot of the issues you mention for autistic poc being demonized/imprisoned and not getting their needs met.
The theory about the Diaz brothers being autistic is really interesting! I could definitely see it. I'll need to think it over more when I play LIS 2 again.
loved the video! you deserve wayy more views ❤
An amazing essay for sure, i appreciate you so much for talking about this and getting vulnerable as it has made me so much more seen as a queer neurodivergent individual.
I'd love to watch this through the end but the audio balancing makes is very hard - the bg music is too loud and it's very distracting
Ah sorry about that. It sounded fine to me in my editing software. I'll try and work on balancing it better for next time.
this video is an absoulte banger
Yes I do! I'm planning on doing a video essay on Night in the Woods and one on the Wavelengths DLC.
@@lostinfaerie06 OMG!! I love NITW I can't wait x3
This is now one of my top favorite video essays. Holy shit. Thank you so much. This is FIRE
Thank you! I'm glad you liked it 😊
one thing about before the storm I don't like is I have a hard time believing that the white woman is made the scape goat instead of the black man. granted the before the storm and the first LIS are not good when it comes to race related issues.
Yeah I absolutely agree. I think both dontnod and deck nine massively fumble the ball in that respect in both LIS 1 and BTS.
Wow, I just finished the video, and this is hands down one of the best video essays I have ever seen. It showed me the Life is strange games from a new and interesting perspective. I have had problems with some of the writing of these games, most of it is due to the lack of intentionality when it comes to the topics of misogyny and mental health. You can see that the core is there, but the writing is not strong enough to push the message far enough, so thank you for your fantastic character analysis, I believe that if people who don't like Chloe see your video, they will change their opinion of her
This is an amazing video.
hiya first of all - this is an incredible video essay. literally made me cry lolol i want to adress the short mention of rachel’s influence on chloe . i was literally in the same kind of relationship as the two of them: my former friend had been well known, straight As student, rich, but also “quirky” and on the loose. and there had been me - average student, not very liked, rebelling against the way i was mistreated by teachers and my parents bcs of my disability (adhd+bpd) . at first i thought our relationship was special, i literally risked my wellbeing trying to spend as much time as i could with her . she was nice, polite, we shared the same hobbies and that bought me. i remember thinking “woow this girl treats me with so much kindness she so different from other people”. we were friends until we both graduated primary school and split our ways . that’s when i’ve noticed that she never really risked anything for me, and it has always been about what she needs. she never really cared about my inner life. this might be waaayy too subjective but to me rachel’s and chloe’s relationship is eerily similar; i don’t blame neither my friend or rachel for the way they behaved but at the same time we must acknowledge that this girl has very destructing influence when it comes to connection between chloe and her. in my eyes she was anxious about going out in the wild alone - she needed a safe boat, a scape goat of you will. was chloe ever “necessary” to stick by her side and engage in life threatening situations? you could argue that chloe has free will and could’ve just say no but the truth is that they both havent known any better at that time (neither have i) and were too afraid to let go of each other once the matters took wrong turn . rachel didn’t want chloe to vanish from her life bcs she needed her as a source of reliability, her +1, her friend, her driver, her assistant, her “gate” to the world of rebellion. on the other hand chloe needed rachel as a guardian angel, loved one, a caretaker, a vessel full of affection and emotions which chloe had lost touch with due to her severe trauma. it’s kinda right person wrong time type of shit except it would have never worked out between them . chloe giving away all of her love and rachel consuming it - without ever making the same effort to ensure chloe is loved. watching this made a few wounds reopen but at the same time i’m glad i did it. it made me realise more about myself:-)
Thank you so much!
I completely get that, and I really relate to feeling that way. I also had a few toxic friendships growing up where I got taken advantage of, and when I was first introduced to Rachel as a character I was really wary of her. But I think as I get older now, I feel more sympathy for her. I wish she could have lived long enough to grow as a person, and also maybe go to therapy lol. But she never got that chance. I would argue that I don't think it's necessarily true that Rachel never risks herself for Chloe, she does try to take the fall in Principal Wells' office, although it does lead to a lesser punishment, but that isn't something Rachel can control. She also physically defends Chloe from Damon in episode 3, but it's true that she wouldn't have even been in that situation if it wasn't for Rachel wanting to find her mom. But yeah I guess it's not really comparable to the risks Chloe takes for Rachel and the things she does for her. Not that I think friendship should be about keeping score, but their relationship does feel uneven. I think you're right that ultimately, unless Rachel and Chloe both changed a lot of their behaviors and got proper help, it never would have worked out in the long term.
@@lostinfaerie06 i couldn't say it better myself !!! once again thank you for creating such insightful essay !! lots of love
What's also to consider is that Rachel later has a relationship with Frank and keeps this a secret from Chloe. This isn't that deep of a betrayal if Chloe and her are friends only, but depending on what choice you make Chloe and her are very clearly romantically involved with each other and Chloe is attracted to her no matter what. We don't know what happens between Before the Storm and Lis 1, but something has to go on for Rachel to pursue a relationship with Frank despite her relationship with Chloe. I don't think Rachel is manipulative on purpose or that Chloe meant nothing to her, but I do think she wasn't really thinking or caring about the consequences of her actions, even if that affected other people, very much being focused on what she wants and needs right now. She might like Chloe and care about her to an extent, but she doesn't care as much about Chloe as Chloe cares about her. I do think a lot of this is due to her upbringing, being privileged and naive because of that, witnessing lying, dishonesty and putting on a character from her dad and being raised with expectations of being the "perfect daughter/student". That plus her world crumbling now, she is also still very young. But still she is at least somewhat deceiving someone who sees her as (one of) the most important person(/people) in her life and made her feel like this goes both ways while simultaneously having a similar relationship with Frank and not being honest about it.
Gotta say I also come from the perspective of having had a toxic friend, I did mess up in this friendship too, but overall she was very focused on her own needs and didn't see her own faults oftentimes. So maybe I'm just also biased, I don't think Rachel and my ex-friend are comparable though
As someone who has loved this series of games since it came out, i appreciate this video with all of my heart
Gracious this hit me, thank you. I realize now why I also never played these games; I'd be looking at myself 🌸
thank you so much!!!!! I loved this
This video struck me, as throughout my whole life, and even as recently as a week ago, I've had family members constantly tell me to 'smile'. Forcefully. I don't know if its because I have resting-bitch face, or my constant fatigue, or what is making me look so dour to these people, but it bothers them enough to cause them discomfort. Enough discomfort that they will insist that I smile to make them feel comfortable.
I've always been told I was an angry girl. As a child it was explosive. Looking back, I wonder if I was having autistic breakdowns, because I would get very angry when I felt overwhelmed. People would tell me I was more like a boy because of it and my interests. To this day, if I show any anger they point and say 'there you are. You are so angry, you need to get it under control' and I would feel guilty. I've worked so hard to channel my anger, to learn to regulate my emotions because no one taught me how, and yet its still not enough. One misstep and I'm still perceived as an angry child with no credibility. Infantalized and belittled. Does not understand how the world works and needs to be sheltered.
All of this topped with verbal abuse and my own queerness has filled with me with a deep sense of shame. I know I need to learn to be nicer to myself, to allow myself to take up space, but its hard when even the people who supposedly love you unconsciously think your existence is wrong and a sin. Subtly hinting at trying out wearing dresses (again) and make up (again) now that I'm older and maybe, hopefully, I will transform into the woman they want. The only thing I'm glad about is that I didn't give in and let society's expectations make me live a lie. I'm insecure as hell, so I was surprised I didn't already give in and start being more feminine, repressing my queerness and masking all my autistic traits, but I know that living behind a mask was an even worst hell that I wouldn't be able to bear, and would destroy my will to live.
Back on topic, Chole's character really resonated with me. An outwardly angry, queer, and insecure girl is so rare to come by in media. The closest I've ever seen myself besides her is Asuka Langely from Neon Genesis Evangelion. Both Asuka's and Chloe's reception as characters have similarities from their fanbases, as people don't like seeing girls who are brash, angry, shouting, but I related so much to that anger. That sadness. Wanting to be seen. The source of that anger tends to be immense pain and sadness that has been unaddressed, and for some of us it stays for a lifetime, and you are left a hollow shell.
Sorry, I just wanted to vent about this. Its rare to see someone cover all of these specific topics at the same time.
No don't apologize for venting! I really relate to all of it and it's why I wanting to make this video, because I needed to talk about how much Chloe means to me and I'm glad you feel the same way.
Can't wait to watch this!!! Will edit when finished (also Taylor Swift reference 👀)
Edit: this video is fantastic! I didn't even think about half these things while watching playthroughs of the games. Now it makes sense why I didn't like Chloe so much; she reminds me of myself too much. I can also relate to Rachel's mother situation, although i feel different towards mine. When i first learned about Sera, I despised her. I guess since my own mom was a drug addict, its hard for me to feel sympathetic towards others struggling with addiction. But I do understand how you get that way, it's not always a conscious decision. I appreciate the perspective of someone battling these issues
this is genuinely the best video essay i’ve ever seen
and just like that... i'm crying ..this was beautiful
as an autistic nonbinary person who, regardless of my presentation, always seen very femme- I have been judged and ridiculed and shamed for being my authentic self my whole life. This video essay hits it right on the head- neurotypical people can keep up the facade of 'normalcy' but deep down we're all imperfect, and some of us need more help or have had more traumatic experiences caused directly by the ableist systems in society. You accurately place the blame on capitalism and This video essay is very well informed and I am shocked to see you with such a low subscriber count. Great job at your first ever video essay!
You expanded on so many aspects, in great depth too I love videos like this it's like an endless conversation, great video thank you
Instant subscriber. what a wonderfully written essay
THIS VIDEO IS SO IMPORTANT. Loved it.
Idgaf if chloe has bpd I still I don’t like her
This game is far from the best but you pull some very interesting and valid points form its experience.
Great Vids.
34:19 lmao yes!
A gem of a an essay for a gem of a game.
Where do I find the people who have conversations about this stuff? Those are my people, I can’t seem to find them lmao
I recommend subscribing to gameassist, and joining their patreon community if you are able to. We talk about this stuff all the time! Also I have a bunch of stuff planned for the future that you might enjoy.
@@lostinfaerie06 Never heard of them! Definitely gonna check it out.
I certainly plan on sticking around here too! This essay got me hooked.
Thanks so much for responding!
Good video
This video is my whole life
1:50
I watched the entire thing and i must say i still don’t like Chole. Also i don’t really agree with your points either. Yes it’s absolutely true that Chloe suffers from William’s death but i cannot tolerate her behavior. Reason are
-David actually tries to help while he admits to having ptsd from war(also i see that in your bias you left out that he has problem too)
- Even if Chloes disrespectful behavior can be explained it doesn’t excuse it and while Joyce works her ass of to support Chloe what effort Chloe is putting? None. As a 19 year old you are rightfully expected to compromise with you parents.
And just last thing i agree with James we know that Sarah brought drugs dealers to their home and that’s enough for me to say write her off completely actions have consequences
Societal expectations being forced upon neurodivergents is not unique to one's sex, and this narrative segregates neurodivergent individuals based upon factors they don't control.
As I described in the video the combination of misogyny and societal pressures and expectations placed upon women and girls as well as sometimes those of us who grow up being perceived and treated as such despite that not being our gender, creates an different autistic experience and a different experience with ableism, just like factors such as race and class influence your experience with ableism as well. Different factors of oppression intersect with each other to create different experiences of oppression. This is called intersectionality. I wasn't claiming that neurodivergent men don't have societal expectations forced on them. But they are not the result of misogyny. Pointing that out isn't "segregating" people lol. It's just pointing out that intersectionality is a thing.
this is definitely untrue. a notable example is how girls with autism and/or adhd are treated vs how boys are. there is a difference because of patriarchy and gender roles.
@@tundrance what difference?
"This can also apply to trans men" Well....Duh, yeah... Wish it didn't but especially regarding autism and the lack of diagnosis in afabs and perceived as women a lot are dismissed or subjected to violence or neglect...
I don't really like chole, Or before the storm as I feel that it rewrote canon to make chole look better. but I love long essay video about lis and to see their perspective of chole. Will continue my thoughts after finishing the video
🎠
uwu whats this from coldplay
Thank you!!! Literally have been saying this since playing bts 😭😭Chloe deserves so much better man, honestly both endings in LIS is devastating
watching your vid right now and am on 14:27 where you mention disablism and ableism and how you don't understand the differenece. For me as an autistic person, I interpret it with both words carrying the meaning "disabled people experiencing discriminatory behaviour" but with disablism reasons behind it to be that they see disabled people as lesser, whilst ableism has more wide range of reasons. Disablism is more definite for their reasons of discriminatory behaviour, ableism is not.
btw don't feel bad for this, the medical field is notorious for having confusing words like this, I should know.
just finished the video, its absolutely incredible and you've honestly helped me to understand her in ways I wouldn't have. If you ever want to explore audience reactions to Chloe and compare it to a characters thats exactly like them but loved, I'd suggest Effy from Skins. Look forward to future vids 🫡