Thank you!!! We DIYED the whole thing and it was a process but love love love the way it turned out. I have new chairs coming that will really tie it together eek
Guys! I am Ghanaian and I asked my girl(Russian) if I could wear my traditional clothes for our wedding and she was like "yeah maybe I can wear it too" I think I just won life. I am the luckiest man alive
I have a really close friend who is Nigerian and Ghanaian and I so badly just want to go to a wedding with her. Any person that likes dressing up/ has the slightest appreciation for fashion would have a blast, I can’t believe the bride to be in that story
It's not the same as a culture preference but my husband wanted to wear an all white tux to our wedding and I did NOT want him to and I told him I really really wanted him to wear a black one and, we compromised and he ended up wearing a white suit with a black collar and cuffs. He told me WHY he wanted to wear one (his dad wore one to his wedding) once he told me this I told him it was his wedding too and if it was important to him then I wouldn't say another word about it, and he's the one who came up with a black and white tux!
Yeah my husband is Chinese and I definitely had a Qipao made for the evening party! And even my western dress had some Oriental fabrics. We had Chinese wedding traditions as well, and sang a Chinese song with the words printed out so everyone could join. Why would someone who loves you reject your culture??
this is what I don’t understand about white weddings. I’m Guyanese and every single person steps out looking absolutely amazing from head to toe. There is absolutely no way any guest can out shine the bride on her day. What are they so afraid of? lmaooo.
I'm Peruvian and when I heard that I was "as he should, he's the groom". Also anyone that has seen Nigerian wedding pictures know that the guess also dress amazing, is she gonna tell the guest to dress down? Wouldn't it be easier for them both to dress up even more impressive??
Story 2: def a hot take. The contrast between saying that looks shouldn’t matter and loving someone for who they are then 2 seconds later saying that the tik tok girl should leave her 60 yr old husband because she deserves someone hot is crazy. Look at it how you want, sexual attraction and compatibility are so important in a relationship. If he wasn’t attracted to her and, like he said, tried for YEARS then I don’t see anything wrong with leaving her. What’s the alternative, cheat? Let them both move on in my opinion.
well said. if i fall in love with someone i love them for who they are on the inside and outside if they change either thing i dont think id like that.
@@peninak3610she DOES deserve someone better. She deserves someone bot becuase she’s working on herself and not just leaving her husband when he makes a change.
For the girl in story 4, with all my peace and love: she needs to grow a spine. I’m not at all blaming her, but if my boss demanded I stay at work while I’m in LABOR, they’ll be needing a hospital too.
No really because what?? Like I feel like some people forget that yes you have to work and your job at certain demands but at the end of the day, you're a grown ass person and it is your life. I would not have asked if I could go, I simply would have left and explained later. And if they fired me, I would deal with it then because it's motherfucking LABOR. A whole ass child is about to emerge from her body. This is not up for debate, if that were me I would be leaving. And I've been in that situation where I was afraid to make waves or speak up at work but this is different. I hope that she learns to stand up for herself after this because this is egregious.
Also if they fired her for leaving to give birth I'm pretty sure that would be a slam-dunk lawsuit. Especially with the mass email John sent out complaining about her pregnancy.
It’s more than likely a fake story because if there’s not a single person on that team that will not report an actual illegal action- it’s a black company (not as in black owned but as in illegal immoral company) Not to say that these companies don’t exist but more than likely the ones in countries that give maternity leave will not be like this in the work culture
THIS. Like WHERE did she pull that tape measure from?! I’ve watched it back like 4 times now and I’m convinced at this point that she conjured it on the spot lol.
STOP. I had to pause and comment. I work in HR and the pregnancy story has me LIVID. I hope that poor woman reports ALL THOSE PEOPLE. That is retaliation. Retaliation is ILLEGAL. I would be actioning ANYONE who exacerbated this situation that this woman should not have gone through in the first place. OMG. Edit: She needs to document EVERY time someone said ANYTHING to her that made her uncomfortable. What was said, who said it, when, and where. She needs to seek legal counsel or go to the EEOC, AND her HR department. A full investigation will start. She should be the one to decide if she wants to continue her employment. If not, okay, can't blame her. But if she wants her job, she has the right to continue her job IN A HARASSMENT-FREE environment. That is the goal of any HR department. We WANT to keep good employees and they deserve to work in a civil workplace. Damn I'm heated. Edit 2: I'm assuming she's in the U.S.
Not a lawyer or hr person here but that is exactly what I said. My first thought was that she needs to sue. Baffles me that anyone would think any of this behavior is normal or healthy. I just said to myself, every single thing someone said or every email that was sent to me trying to assassinate my character, would be recorded. I would be tempted to reply, thank you for this comment. I will be including it in my lawsuit. I feel very sorry for this girl that she doesn't have a backbone. She seems like the type of person that everyone else around her has to take care of her messes because she's not strong enough to do it herself. She really needs to get some balls.
Want to add, and I did reply to someone else's comment about sueing the company, she can go after that manager in a civil suit. You will lose if you try to sue the company, UNLESS the company knew about the harassment, workplace bullying and retaliation and DID NOTHING. She reported the first manager the the company took action. Good. However, unless she reports the additional treatment she is receiving (or learns of it), the company can't act. This is why we have policies and NEED to report violations, even if it is not happening to ourselves. Bystanders' also have an obligation to report it.
the nigerian wedding story: literally what?? why would you get engaged to a nigerian man if you don’t like the idea of a tradional nigerian wedding😭 like i’m just like what
Story 3: When you marry into a multicultural relationship you accept every aspect of that person. It feels like she’s embarrassed of his background and how people will judge them at her wedding. Coming from a Korean/White-American relationship: no wedding in this circumstance.
I agree. It’s setting off alarm bells for me. They need to pause and explore this issue in therapy. Have a thorough convo about her perception(s) of his culture and what’s “inappropriate” about it.
100% this! At this stage in their relationship, I feel like talking about what you're going to wear to your wedding is something you've talked about before even getting engaged? My husband is from a cattle ranching family. It was VERY important to him that he got to wear a cowboy hat at our wedding. I was happy that he wanted to wear something that was important to his family/culture. I would have NEVER contested this request. It was even fun to shop for the hat together! We ended up with a gorgeous matte black Stetson that we got fitted just for him!
Coming from a Chinese-Malaysian who married a white-American, the bride made me so mad! We had a traditional tea ceremony during our rehearsal dinner where I wore a red wedding Qipao. While my husband did not want to wear a Chinese set himself, he was more than happy to wear the matching bow tie that I bought for him. My family was so happy with us incorporating my culture into the wedding and my in-laws were excited to participate.
@@diamcole personally, same. I’m at a stage in life where I don’t deal with nonsense/ intolerance. Anything less than an embrace is a turnoff. That goes for fam/friends and romantic prospects. But OP doesn’t sound willing to let go so hopefully through conversing about his fiancé’s biases, a lightbulb will ignite in his brain.
Story 4: ALL OF THEM SHOULD BE REPORTED TO HR!!! TO HELL WITH ALL OF THEM!!! All of them need to be sued. Poor OP. She has a golden hubby. Bless the husband and OP. To hell with that whole office. She's not just senditive, nice, and kind. She was a doormat, and the office took advantage of that. Being nice does not mean being a doormat, and vice-versa.
Morgan has such a warm, cozy, and inviting personality that makes people so comfortable. I love seeing new guests come in and start off trying to adjust, then towards the end of the episode, always being so sad to hear it's the last story. I've peeped it in multiple shows, as soon as they hear "last story," they say things like: nooo or voice disappointment on it being over. I remember a guest even asked for an extra one. It was so sweet!!
As a British Nigerian have to say Drea is my favourite guest ever. Thank you for introducing her to me. Re the wedding one, imo he's being really kind by only asking for him to wear traditional wear. I couldn't be with someone who can't understand my culture
Yet in ur very statement, u ignore western culture . Weddings in the west are about the bride. Why does SHE have to change her culture for him? Why not he change for her ? Why does it automatically fall on the western women , we are allowed culture too. Grow up
@@nameunavailable-gp3ot Western marriages are about the couple, not the bride. It's a union of two people and he deserves a say too. If you're thinking about getting married, maybe you need to grow up and realise that a ceremony uniting two people isn't just about you.
If the GF is uncomfortable sitting there while OP feeds her baby, the GF can walk out of the room until after she is done feeding the baby. It should have been as simple as that! Edit: just got to the part they said this 😂😂😂
Story 6(?): 11 months. Food before 1 is just for fun. Breastfeeding (or formula) is very important for babies under 1 year of age, no matter how tall or big.
well not just for fun, they also get hungrier the bigger they get and their stomachs grow. milk alone won't keep them full. baby food is to get them used to new tastes and has nutrients and then solids are for real food so they can stay longer and have enough nutrients to support their growth and development. milk is important still until they're about 2 but it won't do much for them after that.
@teamlining7685 Sure, but it's mostly exploration and not if they don't eat their dinner they starve. They'll still get milk in some form. Some babies don't even have teeth until they're 1 year.
as someone who is 19, I would be emotionally mature enough to at the LEAST walk away if I was uncomfy. A baby is a baby no matter the size, 11 months old is a literal baby. 100% agree with you
@@teamlining7685a babies stomach at one year is the size of their fist, still not very big. But I do agree they do get hungrier so it is good to introduce food younger at the end of the day it’s still good to do what works for the baby and you. It’s still an 11 month old baby
You'd be surprised how much someone can change or let their hair down after marriage or long term commitment. Or when they become a dad. You have no idea.
@@victorywalkingtours8843 well thats worse for op because it means he changed for the worse by repeteadly doing somth that bothers op. So he doesnt care about her and gaslight her into thinking hes not being loud....
Story 2: I was so shocked by your reaction 😮 This woman changer her entire personality and appearance, it’s completely valid for his partner to not be attracted to her anymore. She changer the way she eats, the way she looks, her habits… and those things come together with dressing different, maybe not eating with his husband because she wants to fast or eat her special diet, be focused on gym and spend a lot of time there (if she developed ‘manly’ shoulders she must be there a lot). All of this makes a person different.
I agree with you so much. I also feel like Morgan would normally side with this kind of story.. if she has changed everything about herself including her personality then he has every right to feel like he’s with a different person to who he married and if he doesn’t feel attracted to her anymore then he is doing the correct thing by leaving… people change and fall out of love all the time. It doesn’t make you am asshole. If this was a woman writing about a man it would be totally different. I normally agree with Morgan but this time I feel like she’s agreeing with her guest too much like she doesn’t want to offend her by disagreeing with her… but that’s just my hot take 😊
I see your point, but I think that love shouldn't be conditional, and if you truly love someone, you will love them no matter how their appearance changes because you do not only love them for their body but their heart and inside beauty as well which is more important. And if he is so easily grossed now, he would have probably done the same when they get older even if she didn't change.
@@WeeMeg88This is common with Morgan. Every once in a while she'll bring on some weird guest with terrible takes, and will just passively agree with them.
He never said she changed her personality it was about her looks and him not being attracted to her. If he had a problem with her eating and gym habits he could have said something earlier and not just spring divorces on her. Also was their marriage just about looks and physical attraction? I can’t believe yall are trying to defend this shallow take💀
@@daluogbuefi9480 Shallow sympathizes with shallow. These aren't people who are dating. They are married with kids. 30lbs after having babies is not some drastic change. Breast reductions are done for pain relief. This guy is a complete manipulative tool as he accused her of not loving her children for making the changes she did. Anybody defending this can pound sand. Divorcing her is doing her a favor because now she is free to find someone who deserves her.
For the Nigerian groom, the brides whole argument is that he will “stick out” in his traditional Nigerian attire…but don’t you want that? Shouldn’t the bride and groom be the center of attention at their wedding? This is why brides wear white. Having him in something unique sounds like perfect to me, so they both have everyone’s eyes on them
Is he the only Nigerian person that will be there because if he’s not, they will probably dress up in their traditional clothing also. Crazy. He wouldn’t stand out at all.
Story 2: I usually agree with your takes Morgan but this one has me flabbergasted. It’s not toxic to no longer be attracted to your partner once they’ve drastically changed their appearance. Imagine if he had decided to get a huge face tattoo, would she be the AH for no longer being attracted to him? He never said he didn’t still love her at the core, he’s just no longer physically attracted to her and that’s okay. It sounds like he went about it in the best way he could’ve, he wasn’t mean or bitter about it just truthful. It feels wrong to call him toxic when he can’t control what he’s attracted to. Also, a lot assumptions were unfairly made about OP - claiming he’s insecure, or out of shape and jealous of the attention his wife is getting when we don’t even have enough context to know if that’s true or not.
Watching this story now and thinking the same, at the core it is just them growing apart rather than together and doesn't seem like she is doing things in a very healthy way but each to their own if that is what is making her happier.
Totally agree with you. I don’t agree with them saying the guy has no right. It should be a collective thing as in all marriages. If tables were turned, they would be berating the husband for sure. One of the worse takes I’ve heard on this pod.
Girl, every time Morgan talks about her wedding plans she adds new crazy things and it fun just listening to what she wants to do lmaoooo. All the best for the big day and the many ones after❤❤
Story 4: She needs to report it to HR…she has a inhospitable work environment. That behavior needs to be documented as it will lead to a lawsuit if they don’t handle it properly
Love this co-host. Thanks for the introduction. When you said "Okay last one." And Drea responded with the cutest "Nooo" it was adorable. Please have her back on in the future.
Hot take for story 3: she is a bridezilla. He mentioned giving his fiancée full rein of the planning because "that's what she wanted." Depsite him nit really caring, he gave input for this ONE THING that has to do with his culture. And she vetoed it. She might not be trying to change people's hair colors or have tattoos covered, but she wants to American-ize further and not let his culture shine.
@@Billywashere89 I could never imagine my partner feeling like he had to almost beg to incorporate their culture. A wedding and marriage is about the couple becoming one. Not one person.
@@nameunavailable-gp3ot he isn't asking her to sacrifice the whole thing. He is asking to wear a piece of traditional clothing that his culture wears on their wedding day.
@@abbykelley6844 ye I certainly over reacted , just get tired of hypocrisy, western weddings the only thing that's really relevant is the bride being in white and standing out from everyone else , that would literaly be sacrificed by him wearing tht , now I do totally agree if I was in tht situation I'd want to include my partners culture, but at the same time he gave her complete control, if my wife told me u can chose the car go ahead its all u, then she's like why dnt we get tht car in pink wowww I'd say hell no
The one about breastfeeding: the mom is only 22. Her being 19 is no excuse for her actions. It’s recommended to breastfeed until babies are 18months-2 years now! Formula is sooo expensive. $50-$100 a week. Babies are so much more complicated than a lot people understand. I am having my second in 2 months, and some people are just uncomfortable with breastfeeding, when they’re advanced mentally, and when toddlers can eat whole foods without teeth.
Story one: I have autism & my bf has adhd so he can get very loud and it’s crazy you said get a safe word bc if I tell him ‘notches’ he will quiet down bc sometimes he’s so loud I feel like i can’t even hear him 😭😭
That’s literally me with my fiance😂 I have ADHD with high functioning autism so I can get loud and he’s just a quiet reserved person and so he’ll put his hand by his head and “push” down to signal to quiet down a lil bit. Also have things for in the car when I’m not paying attention.
Exactly!!! That’s what I was thinking. Like this wouldn’t have been an issue if he didn’t cheat. But he did so he has to deal with his wife’s valid feelings and thoughts.
Phew story 6 hit close to home. My daughter is tall, very tall. Like 95 percentile for height. People make wild assumptions about how kids/toddlers/babies should act regardless of height (but I think seeing a tall or big baby doesn’t help). I was pushing my toddler in a stroller one day and an old man said, in passing, “that kid is too big to be pushing em”. Like?? Also, there’s so much shame with breast feeding or not breast feeding. It seems like no matter what a parent does they either didn’t breast feed long enough, breast fed for too long, shouldn’t have switched to formula, or should have used formula. There’s no winning. 😮💨
My middle child was small when he was 5-6 and riding a two wheeler. People always said, oh, he’s so good, riding a 2 wheeler. That only lasts until I tell them his age. 😂
For the first story, I feel like the husband is actually kind of a jerk. Even if he doesn’t feel like he’s loud, his partner is ADAMANT that he’s too loud and that it is causing her discomfort. He should respect that he’s too loud for his partner, even if he doesn’t see it, and he needs to be respectful of what she needs.
I was thinking this too! My boyfriend is also a bit on the noisy side but he genuinely doesn’t notice. If I say something though he always apologizes and tries to quiet down. The problem with the husband in story 1 is his reaction to her discomfort
the pregnancy story: i would’ve went into work after maternity leave for the last time and brought cupcakes for everyone that had laxatives in them. have fun trying to sit through your meeting when ur trying not to shut yourself lol
Story 2 - Aging is not the same as plastic surgery. I think it's valid to be unattracted to your partner after plastic surgery. It's not a gradual change like aging. It's not natural. And it can change someone's looks drastically. With that said, yes, the person who owns the body gets to decide what they do with that body. But it's ok if it takes him a bit to get used to the physical changes.
I get him really, but I feel like it isn't even that major of a surgery?? From what he tells it's just her body that has slightly changed. I remember one story from Reddit about a man who was not attracted to his wife after her multiply getting a lot of face surgeries (I believe he said she started looking like handsome Squidward or smth lol), and even there he tried to rekindle their relationship. Breaking up over changes in the body (and especially boobs, oh my god) seems really shallow to me.
@@StasyaWorm + It's not just breaking up, they're married and have children! Also, as far as I know and I'm definitely not a gym girl, doing some weights does NOT give you "men" shoulders. It's hard as fuck to gain muscles in such exaggerated way. He's an asshole. Still, it is tricky because he can't really control his physical attraction; as much as he loves her personality (which the post doesn't really show... He only talks about looks and a possible ED), if he doesn't find himself loving her anymore there is no "trying to fix it", imo. He's probably doing her a favor in the long run if he does end up going for divorce.
she didnt get plastic surgery. she got a reduction. thats cosmetic surgery. Plastic surgery is COMPLETELY different. she literally just started working out, eating better, and got a reduction. none of that is plastic surgery
@@StasyaWormno, he said these are drastic changes to the point he can’t recognize her. Could be an exaggeration but what if he’s not into the body builder physic? What are his options? I don’t get why that makes him TA.
The 2nd one said the guy felt he was no longer attracted to his wife and he's an asshole for wanting to leave but then you go and talk about the young girl with an old man who are separating and saying 'go girl, you deserve someone hot', different circumstances I know but it still feels contradictory. Like others have said it's nothing to do with a slow aging process, it's not his fault he's no longer attracted to his wife, would she not rather be with someone who is attracted to her new body type? No dis on her for changing her body but it's not his fault he's no longer attracted to her.
@@sophieharrison2282 No. He is an AH because he is trying to manipulate the readers with his version. 1) There is nothing drastic about losing 30lbs especially after having 3 children. 2) They don't just perform breast reductions. You have to have a documented medical history of pain from the breasts. Breast reductions aren't performed to make breasts not saggy. That is a breast lift. If she is no longer breast feeding they probably have just shrunk down to what they were before they were engorged with milk. 3) You cannot starve yourself and build enough muscle to have man shoulders. It is difficult for men to put in muscle mass none the less a female. Neither are doing it without eating a ton of food. 4) This manipulative POS accused her of not loving her children because she has taken care of her body in a way he didn't approve of. She is taking care of herself, not neglecting herself. She is not neglecting her children. HE is putting how attractive he finds it above his family. This is because he has already been cheating and he is making it HER fault.
as a person with social anxiety, Drea's insight and advice on the pregnancy/job meeting situation actually opened up my eyes a bit -- "in this life all you have is yourself".. gonna be my new motto for whenever im afraid to stand up for myself ❤️
Story 2: No AH here. I completely understand losing physical attraction. I also think the complete lifestyle change is rubbing him the wrong way and not just the fact that she's changed physically. But it's normal to cry and be resentful, angry and devastated by divorce. It's normal for some friends to drop you and villainise you in these situations. It's just how people react. Hope the hate comments stop though. Neither of the couple are wrong in my opinion. He can leave, and she is allowed to be devastated and wish she'd never met him. I'm confused why he says that she doesn't care about their children though. There was no context for that, and that makes me wonder what other details we aren't getting.
Story 4 has me HEATED not America wanting to force women to have babies and then this is how they are treated when they do? Men in the workplace acting like that?? Disgusting
Story number two is NTA. We would NEVER tell a woman to stay with a man who she was not longer attracted to- we would never tell a woman to stay with a man who turned into a gym rat to a point of unhealthy (not eating for a day every couple days is unhealthy) attraction is a key part in a relationship.
To the woman who's trying not to rock the boat: If you can't do it for yourself, do it for the other people who might be put in your position in the future. I often find that if you take yourself out of the aquation, it's easier to seek the right justice. Edit: Glad their was a commentor on reddit with the same sentiment.
29:29 someone tell this bride to be that her groom is supposed to stand out as it’s HIS WEDDING TOO. His future wife seems to not care about what her future husband wants and needs.
The story about being in labor at work…sue. Blast them. One of my friends LOST HER BABY because her job wouldn’t let her leave even though she knew something was wrong. The company is one that suing would almost be pointless. A big big big company in an industry that covers things up left and right. I hate this for OP.
56:48 Oh it MUST be about the money. THIS is the best way to send a message to a company. They don't care about you, your health, your kids. The only thing that can make them change anything IS money
no like morgan and drea have too much grace. i am a current 19 year old and i know how to not have attitude and mind my business, especially when it comes to in-laws essentially. the girlfriend, instead of asking a good faith question, or simply removing herself from the space, she came in with huffing and puffing and with rudeness, so she can handle some rudeness back.
and they went out of their way to find the girlfriend’s age and completely ignored that OP said in the main story that OP is only three years older than her
teenagers are not children and know better. 19 is old enough for a lot of people to live on their own. she should know to keep her mouth shut about a mother feeding her child.
Nah dude imagine being 19 and seeing a 3 ft tall 10 month old baby? I can’t imagine that at 26. And then seeing it breastfed the first time you meet the sister? That’s a weird and unique situation and 19 is still super immature to experience that lol give her some grace
Exactly! The teenager being uncomfortable is HER problem. It is completely normal for an 11 month old to still breastfeed l. OP is definitely NOT the asshole
STORY 3!! I literally had to stop my car to comment. I married into the Middle Eastern culture and had two weddings. And Never. NEVER, would I deny my husband his cultural celebrations!! Plus, GUYS, non-western traditions are so so beautiful. So rich! It made me love him more seeing him celebrate with his family. If she doesn’t end up seeing his side I would say, leave her. She’s not going to be able to keep Nigerian traditions alive with their children if she doesn’t even respect them now. Also, if she was being denied a western wedding…. like bffr
Story2 : Look, I don’t think it’s wrong to no longer be attracted to someone after they undergo a complete transformation. Also It’s not good if he just bottles it up and lives in misery. Also not sure where all those assumptions about his character came from. One last thing , This reminded me of the story where a man was no longer attracted to his wife after she had plastic surgeries (buckle fat removal etc.) and your reaction was totally different. Just wondering what make you decide this time around it wasn’t justifiable
I wondered why the different opinion this time as well… it does seem that he would “trade her in” given that he didn’t like that she looked, by some people’s standards, better.
I love Morgan & the pod, but she absolutely morphs her opinions & attitudes to match her guests which makes her come across inconsistent and sometimes outright ignorant. It’s an issue becoming more frequent in recent months.
@@therealgumdrop I think the difference might be that in the other case the woman changed her face completely, she didn't get one surgery, there were several procedures on her face and body, whereas in this case was just a breast reduction, and exercise
i’m with you on this. people can change themselves for themselves. HOWEVER, we don’t get to dictate how our partner reacts. we all want someone that we are not just attracted to mentally, but also physically. it doesn’t make you shallow. most people that say, “i don’t care about looks” aren’t being honest with themselves. it happens on catfish all the time. if he’s no longer attracted to her he will start acting differently like the other story. then he’s the bad guy because he’s not attracted to her anymore. it’s always so quick to blame the man. then they talk about the young girl that is “upgrading” from her older husband and that’s fine?! okay.
The wife from that story did extreme fad plastic surgery to remove the fact from her face. Breast reduction to address saggy breasts and buccal fat removal are drastically different in results, one can and often does go into uncanny valley territory and it’s not the reduction.
The last story with her friends saying she’s overreacting- the other woman is in the same friend group/social group! Their alliances might not be with the OP!
story 2 - but if he gained 300 more pounds and became morbidly obese, would she be the AH for not being attracted to him anymore? of course not, so i don’t see how this is any different. idk why we like to pretend like physical attraction doesn’t matter or we don’t have preferences. after concerns have been made & conversations have been had and shut down repeatedly/not taken seriously, what else is there to be done atp? i would never want someone i love to force themselves to be physically attracted to me just to protect my own feelings. especially if i knew i looked good wtf.
Are you fr comparing losing 30 pounds to gaining 300? What's the logic here?? Also yeah, she would be the AH. Not for not being attracted anymore, but for not trying to help him become healthy again and just dipping out.
@@gae_uwuI don’t think it’s just about her loosing 30 pounds. I think it also has to do with the fact that she did a 180 personality flip and also with her entire life. I know for a fact if I would do a complete flip of who I am and become a muscle mommy, my partner wouldn’t be attracted to me. In all honesty, that is okay! Everyone has likes and dislikes everyone has preferences. If you completely change who you are inside and out the person who fell in love with you before this flip may fall out of love. I personally feel there’s no assholes. She’s doing her and he can’t help how he feels. They shouldn’t stay in a relationship they aren’t happy in. They should go and find partners that make them happy. Also with having kids mixed in, it’s best to split if you aren’t happy with the relationship. It will end up causing resentment and kids pick up on that.
@@alexi5903you can change your lifestyle without changing your personality…it doesnt sound like she did that. she changed the way she ate and the way she worked out. thats quite literally it. he barely even brought up her personality.
@@gae_uwuit really doesn’t matter what she did, she can change whatever she wants to, it’s her body. she could of gotten 10 tattoos, pierced her entire face, and shaved all her hair off, at the end of the day he’s no longer physically attracted. the praise of her weight loss and “she would be the AH but for not helping him be healthy again” is so ironic because she’s been adopting unhealthy eating behaviors from the internet to become “healthy”. you can talk to someone about something they’re doing all day long but if they don’t see an issue with it and they don’t want to change, all you can do is remove yourself from the situation and stop wasting each others time.
If I noticed my partner gaining a bunch of weight I wouldn't leave them lol, I would try to encourage an healthier lifestyle cause I want them to live longer and still be with me
Story 7 - I'm over here scratching my head as to WHY he didn't just freaking disclose the affair?? That's very suspicious to me! I would be more gracious to him if he was upfront from the getgo. I don't think they'd send them together if they knew? Am I crazy for doubting his motives because of this?
I was wondering that too. I get it would make it weird with his coworkers at first, but he should have told HR about their history when she started working with him.
I think the husband is making up some of this story or hiding details. She starts working there and he is “forced” to spend all this time with her? No, he is not as pure as he is acting.
Exactly. Yes it would make it awkward to explain to every one that you cheated, but that's the cost of an affair. It should have been disclosed up front.
Story two: he’s not the asshole. Psychologist here. So you partner changes completely and he’s the asshole because he’s falling out of love? That is a very toxic take, you two seemed to miss that it seems like she did not change only her looks, it’s clear by the story but even if it was only that, he still has the right to not be atracted just like she has the right to change herself. There are no assholes here, in life people change and sometimes we are not for each other anymore. English is not my first language so sorry.
It's NAH for me. I don't think she's wrong for wanting to change herself and I don't think he's wrong for falling out of love. Although, I do find some of the language he used to describe the way she looks now to be interesting (she has a man's shoulders, etc.) - seems like the best thing that could have happened, happened. Now they can be with people who they feel values them.
Yep I agree but also I feel like the way he described here was really weird and kind of shallow... And I think there would be a lot more ways to approach this issue and maybe he needed to try to renew their spark or go to couples counseling. Also her dieting that strictly looks like ED to be honest... I completely understand that generally you don't even need a big enough reason to leave to justify your breakup if you're simply unhappy in your relationship, but the whole story doesn't seem right to me
I also found it weird how Morgan the guest tried to twist it into him being jealous and having an ego when all he talked about was his personal attraction to his wife. He also never talked about getting attention or his personal looks and they just make assumptions to justify their take
@@blingblaow3251 I think the assumptions of ego playing a part in it was due to how he worded some sections of his post. Ego can definitely show up in attraction and that’s not inherently bad, it can show up in different ways.
Story 1: the frustrating root of the issue is: sounds like he doesn't care about how other people feel and want to be considerate. He doesn't think he's loud so he just wants to be right and make zero effort, instead of making his partner and others feel more comfortable.
i think he might just be neurodivergent and doesn’t understand volume control. i actually struggle with the exact same thing of being too loud my entire life.
@@Lannie85 yes… and so have other people to me… i’m not saying he’s right but it’s hard to not be loud when you naturally are just loud. she should’ve known he was a loud person before. you cant see things in someone you don’t like but then think “oh i can fix him”.
Story 5 reminds me of that one reddit story where the OP wrote about being disappointed that his son wasn't black, so he couldn't share black culture. The OP was white and his wife and mother of his child was black. The OP went on about always being into stereotypical "black" things. His and the wife's baby came out looking exactly like him. Skin tone, eyes, hair color. I remember that he brought up that his wife was questioned about being the child's nanny, who the kid's mom was, constantly because the kid LOOKED completely white. That wasn't the major upsetting thing for OP, though. It was that he couldn't teach "black culture" to the kid, for some reason. The reason this story reminds me of that one is because of OP's problem with what his friend and his partner decided to name their child. In the story i mentioned, OP talked about not seeing a point in his wife buying their son black dolls, introducing him to books with black characters, etc. because the kid was "white" (ignoring that the child is biracial, even if he looks more like the white OP/father in that story).
100% but these are the same people who would call a man a bigot because he wouldn't date a trans woman. Guarantee of the roles were reversed in this story, their opinion would be completely opposite. Love the podcast and have listened to every episode, but the hosts are hypocrites.
Story 2: if she can do anything she wants with her body since it’s her choice, I think it’s fair for the husband to exercise his right to leave the marriage if attraction is gone.
Story 2: Not everyone is attracted to muscular woman. I think that’s the crux of the issue, she’s now too muscular and her breast reduction might have made her look even more muscular. There’s also a lifestyle shift that a lot of people don’t jive with. Especially if she only eats “healthy foods” and fasts multiple times a week - that can be incompatible with people who aren’t interested in health and fitness, who would rather go out and try new restaurant or order in a pizza and watch a movie. I definitely get losing weight and loving yourself (I lost 80 lbs and got cosmetic surgery after weight loss), but it can be difficult to be with someone who keeps a strict fitness and dietary regimen, which is why you typically see them date and marry people who keep a similar lifestyle.
I immediately was siding with OP on story too because I don't care for the whole "gym is life" thing. I also am not physically attracted to overly muscular men.
about the last story - He took the decision to cheat on her and has to now accept the consequences. These problems at work wouldn’t exist if he didn’t cheat on her in the first place. He has to suck it up and find a solution by himself.
And if he had also disclosed the relationship to his company as he should have in the beginning. At this point he has a track record for being deceitful
THESE WERE MY EXACT THOUGHTS!!! like oh you were embarrassed to tell your company you had an affair?? you could’ve you know, just not fucking cheated my guy,, every single point OP made was a direct result of his selfish and callous actions. he did cheat. he did lie by omission. he should face the consequences and this woman shouldn’t have to question herself, he should’ve made the choice for them both immediately upon hearing about this trip, or even told the company right away when she started. he sounds spineless and she deserves better. also she needs better friends because who in their right fucking non-internalized misogyny mind would actually think she’s overreacting??
Had to skip story 2, the double standard was too annoying. A partner drastically changing life style is a valid reason for separation. "She's starting her health journey" when he wrote that she sometimes doesn't eat at all for a day. Nah, it's not about being a supportive partner, it's way more complicated than that. Reverse the gender and we'd all be hating on that "gym bro" vibe.
Thank you! I’m not sure if a gender swap would change anything for me, but I agree about a lifestyle change being a good reason for seperation. He describes her as being a completely different person than the person he married. That might not be true, but for all we know it is. Why all the stupid assumptions?? That annoyed me most. Glad I’m not the only one who started skipping at 18.30… I know Morgan does her best and I love her, but this is one of those things I hope the reads all the comments on and gets back to us about in a future episode, because this is so out of pocket for her. She is normally very good at keeping random assumptions out of the conversation I think.
THANK YOU! you cant say her body her choice (which it is) but on the same breath say he HAS to find her atractive. He too has a right to his feelings. and i agree it goes deeper, its probably not just the physical apearance if she changed their whole dynamic.. you cant blame him.
I think it more of the context of how the husband described the wife. It was very disrespectful. Plus the reasoning was very superficial op didn’t state any behavioral changes just diet and appearance. Morgan even gave them the benefit of the doubt and even said maybe food was type of bonding experience for the couple but even OP didn’t mention it. I don’t think it a fair comparison to say it’s a double standard because then it’d be more along the lines of my partner looks more feminine when I married a masculine man?
dont think guy 2 is an asshole at all, he tried his best to continue loving his wife but sexual attraction is a real thing and he just wasnt attracted to her anymore. Shes totally in her right to love herself and embrace her new health and fitness but hes also in his right to be not be attracted to that. I also think it has to do with their personalities along with physical though because maybe with all these new found hobbies shes also changed as a person. again thats not a bad thing but they might just be at 2 different points in their life now
I'm just kind of wondering if she ever talked to him about it. Like I would probably want to get my husband's opinions and I think we could make decisions together. If you really love the other person you'd be more open.
Honestly, though I don’t know what’s up with Morgan and her double standards lately but I literally am about to unsubscribe imagine if it was the other way around she’d be like yeah girl you go get a better looking man….
Story 3: the traditional outfits are GORGEOUS! I just watched Emily and Kobe wedding on 90 day fiance and my jaw was on the floor. They looked so beautiful in their traditional style. I want to go to a wedding like that so badly!
i’m only 30 minutes in and i LOVE Drea, her energy, sense of humor, and perspectives are so great. i’m so gonna follow her on other platforms and would love to see her on THT again :)
Hot take here, but story 2 is fair enough.. for some people, attraction is a massive requirement in a relationship, which also effects the sexual chemistry. He may feel threatened by her weight loss and new muscle somewhat but he could also just not be attracted to the muscle or weight loss. Further to this, people who diet and lift weights can live a different life in regards to food/activity, which he clearly doesn't enjoy himself or resonates with. If he doesn't want to be with someone he has nothing in common with anymore, then that's his choic, and it's fine to make that choice. She will now be free to find someone that treasures her for how she is now.
For story 2 i dont think hes the ah if your not attracted to something your not attracted he cant really force it and yes she has every right to get healthy and love herself but he also has a right to how he feels plus if hes not attracted to a muscular women than they probably wont have a good smex life anymore and thats important for a happy relationship
On the other hand actors dehydrate themselves to have definition for the shoot, to show off those gains better, and lose them in between while taking a break with plenty of water and nutrition, while still being in shape. Wife goes hard to increase metabolism and burn away stubborn long term fat stores rn, so may look cut or unevenly malnourished. Maybe after hitting her target weight or slimming the most problematic places she will switch to healthy upkeep and some softness will return. We don't know what her boobs and health problems with them were. Maybe they caused chronic back pain and prevented excercising, maybe they were comically big and now still huge just not affecting quality of life as much. Or maybe its the Nutty Professor situation where same results of him trying to get in shape looked completely different before and after fat melting potion
it takes years to lose and gain that much muscle.. it sounds like he never communicated with her and just decided one day to leave. he also talks about her horribly, who says the woman that they’re married to has “man shoulders” tf
Just wanted to let you know your show has brought so much inspiration and happiness into my life. I know it might sound silly, but especially on the days I am in the dumps, and I see a new video posted I get so excited because it’s 2 hours I can let my mind relax and just listen. Some of the stories you have read have really actually knocked some sense into me. I’m going through a lot right now, and I’m so grateful for what you share with us! Please don’t ever stop. And please please come to Niagara Falls, Ontario Canada one day. I’ll be the first to buy a ticket! ❤
Story 2: why should someone suffer because you don’t like how you look? I don’t think someone should be forced to be with someone just bc they were attracted to them at one point. I’m on a weight loss journey and if my man didn’t support it and wasn’t attracted to me anymore I would wish for him to tell me instead of suffer and just not be attracted to me but still have sex or whatever.. like it’s not balding as you get older or sagging as you get older …
In the 2nd story, to be fair to OP, not all people/men are attracted to muscles. In my 20's, after a breakup, I drop 20+ lbs and became very lean and muscular. My bf and I got back together but he HATED that I lost weight and was now muscular. He constantly brought home junk food in an attempt to make me gain weight. We argued a LOT about the food I would no longer eat. Bottom line, everyone have preferences or looks they are or are not attracted to. If you're with your true person, you can probably work through it. I can understand that OP isn't attracted to his wife's new look. Generally-speaking, men hope that their wife don't change. I'm not saying that I agree, but I do understand.
Story 2, I don’t think he’s an AH. People want to pretend like they’re not shallow in some form or another but we ALL are! We all have preferences and we all find certain things attractive or not attractive. If my partner was to walk through the front door tonight with a Skin head and a Gym Bro’s body, I’d probably vomit in my mouth a little and be instantly put off. Like if I was to lose a ton of weight and dye my hair blonde, he wouldn’t be impressed at all. Looks ARE important; you can scream that they’re not all day long but they are. You may have gotten with your partner for other reasons, but over the years you become accustomed to how they look. And if that was to drastically change and it changed the way you views them and you couldn’t get past it. What do you do? Stay and be unattracted to them for the rest of your life? Knowing you’re not happy and everything in your life is going to change. No, you tell them, you talk through it and if your can’t sort out they problems you have, you leave. He’s not wrong for what he’s doing. Staying with someone you’re not happy with, ESPECIALLY when you have kids is seriously unhealthy. It’s just that this is looks based that everyone is going to jump on him. It’s not right in my opinion. Not being attracted to your partner anymore because they’ve completely switched up who they were when you married them ISNT TOXIC. What is toxic is labelling a man as such and saying “he’s insecure!”. That is wild to me. If this was a woman saying her partner got fat and she doesn’t love him anymore you’d all be screaming leave him, do you, be happy, from the rooftops. 🤮
@@marybbc1727that story was completely different. major plastic surgeries are vastly different than working out and a breast reduction. they are not the same
@@marybbc1727that story was completely different bffr. gaining muscle is not the same as getting 5 plastic surgeries. in that story, they argued about wether or not she should get the surgeries for an entire year before her mother gave her the money and pressured her into it, it was a drastic change right away. gaining muscle and losing 30 pounds takes years, he had so much time to discuss this with her. in the other story, he talked about how much he loved his wife but he couldn’t control what he’s attracted to sexually, in this one he just degrades her. who says the woman they love has “man shoulders”?? he seems like he doesn’t even like her.
Story 2: Yes, its her body, she can do whatever, im all for that (i want a breast lift myself btw), BUT you cant judge the guy for not being attracted to her anymore after that kind of drastic change of her looks.. Its completely normal.. After all its simple and we are just humans, not some brainded robots.
For me the issue is how he’s phrasing the story. He’s justified in how he feels, but the way he talks about her body (she has “man shoulders”, saying she doesn’t care about their children when he brought up divorce, makes him come across as an asshole. You’re on the internet and you’re trying to make yourself look as good as possible and you’re still coming across as an asshole. He’s not an asshole for his feelings, but he is one for how he’s talking about them.
I agree, I was looking for a comment about this story. I think his wording and phrasing is pretty rude, but if he isn't attracted to her anymore then it's not doing either of them any favors. Physical attractiveness is not the end-all and be-all but it does factor into relationships obviously. She deserves someone that is going to think that she is beautiful and admires her body and he should be with someone that he is attracted to. He's still a jerk for the way he was thinking about her and stuff like that but it's better to just separate
Drea was a fantastic guest! She was so into the stories and listened to Morgan's responses so actively. Please have her back! I have not heard of her until now, but I will follow her! Thank you for the introduction ❤
For story 5, I think there are a select few times when you can give a dissenting opinion on a baby name: if it references a deplorable person (like Adolf) or if the name is made up/hard to pronounce (Gianaeffehre). But celebrating your heritage by naming a child something from your ancestors’ culture is absolutely acceptable, OP was out of line to criticize it.
Story 4: This story is so wild. Especially the part about the colleagues being mad that the boss's career could be jeopardized? Why do these people CARE?? The company does NOT care about you. Nobody at that company should plead their loyalty to it. It's wild that none of these grown-ass people have realized that their company is not their religion or their family or anything.
Story 2, my husband and I have a similar age gap, just about 5years older and married for 12years. Just before the pandemic he had weight loss surgery but it was something we discussed and I understood his reasons etc, we also had psychologist appointments where they did warn us that relationships can change and breakdown after the big appearance changes and the lifestyle and personality changes that come along with it. I don’t think he is the AH, maybe he could express it a little better but i get the feeling perhaps the $10k surgery was not very much discussed prior to the money being spent and maybe it wasn’t completely money they had free for that purpose? He did say he tried to reconnect and get past his own feelings about it but he just dosn’t to seem to find her attractive to him anymore and if you aren’t in love with someone anymore then you both deserve the opportunity to move on.
Holy shit the new set looks AMAZING
My jaw dropped, it looks stunning!!
I agree! I was just about to comment that!
Same! Looooove it!
Thank you!!! We DIYED the whole thing and it was a process but love love love the way it turned out. I have new chairs coming that will really tie it together eek
@@TwoHotTakes Ahh! So excited to see it! You guys did amazing 🤩
Guys! I am Ghanaian and I asked my girl(Russian) if I could wear my traditional clothes for our wedding and she was like "yeah maybe I can wear it too" I think I just won life.
I am the luckiest man alive
I have a really close friend who is Nigerian and Ghanaian and I so badly just want to go to a wedding with her. Any person that likes dressing up/ has the slightest appreciation for fashion would have a blast, I can’t believe the bride to be in that story
It's not the same as a culture preference but my husband wanted to wear an all white tux to our wedding and I did NOT want him to and I told him I really really wanted him to wear a black one and, we compromised and he ended up wearing a white suit with a black collar and cuffs. He told me WHY he wanted to wear one (his dad wore one to his wedding) once he told me this I told him it was his wedding too and if it was important to him then I wouldn't say another word about it, and he's the one who came up with a black and white tux!
Yeah my husband is Chinese and I definitely had a Qipao made for the evening party! And even my western dress had some Oriental fabrics. We had Chinese wedding traditions as well, and sang a Chinese song with the words printed out so everyone could join.
Why would someone who loves you reject your culture??
i'm really happy for you! but also this should be a given. it would be a problem if your partner didn't want your traditions in your wedding.
When I tell you would be HONORED to wear my future spouse's traditional clothes if they asked me to.
As a Ghanaian, when I heard that bride say the groom would stick out, I immediately said, "My friend, it's my wedding..."
this is what I don’t understand about white weddings. I’m Guyanese and every single person steps out looking absolutely amazing from head to toe. There is absolutely no way any guest can out shine the bride on her day. What are they so afraid of? lmaooo.
Exactly! Let the man dress like a king! It’s his wedding.
literally?? thats the point. its his wedding??
Me too! That's the point girl!
I'm Peruvian and when I heard that I was "as he should, he's the groom". Also anyone that has seen Nigerian wedding pictures know that the guess also dress amazing, is she gonna tell the guest to dress down? Wouldn't it be easier for them both to dress up even more impressive??
When Drea gets upset and her accent goes 0-100 in 0 seconds 😂 I love her!! Great takes.
Story 4 is batshit crazy, sue John's ass all the way. HE RUINED HIS OWN CAREER. What's wrong with these people it was a labour goddamnit. Girl RUN.
Story 2: def a hot take. The contrast between saying that looks shouldn’t matter and loving someone for who they are then 2 seconds later saying that the tik tok girl should leave her 60 yr old husband because she deserves someone hot is crazy. Look at it how you want, sexual attraction and compatibility are so important in a relationship. If he wasn’t attracted to her and, like he said, tried for YEARS then I don’t see anything wrong with leaving her. What’s the alternative, cheat? Let them both move on in my opinion.
well said. if i fall in love with someone i love them for who they are on the inside and outside if they change either thing i dont think id like that.
It shocked me when she said the thing about the younger girl deserving someone hotter. What are we even talking about??
@@peninak3610she DOES deserve someone better. She deserves someone bot becuase she’s working on herself and not just leaving her husband when he makes a change.
For the girl in story 4, with all my peace and love: she needs to grow a spine. I’m not at all blaming her, but if my boss demanded I stay at work while I’m in LABOR, they’ll be needing a hospital too.
I would be so petty id give birth in that office. You want me to stay so bad oh I’m staying alright
No really because what?? Like I feel like some people forget that yes you have to work and your job at certain demands but at the end of the day, you're a grown ass person and it is your life. I would not have asked if I could go, I simply would have left and explained later. And if they fired me, I would deal with it then because it's motherfucking LABOR. A whole ass child is about to emerge from her body. This is not up for debate, if that were me I would be leaving. And I've been in that situation where I was afraid to make waves or speak up at work but this is different. I hope that she learns to stand up for herself after this because this is egregious.
And then she drove herself to the hospital. Like girl call an ambulance at that point. Tell them to send two.
Also if they fired her for leaving to give birth I'm pretty sure that would be a slam-dunk lawsuit. Especially with the mass email John sent out complaining about her pregnancy.
It’s more than likely a fake story because if there’s not a single person on that team that will not report an actual illegal action- it’s a black company (not as in black owned but as in illegal immoral company)
Not to say that these companies don’t exist but more than likely the ones in countries that give maternity leave will not be like this in the work culture
Morgan whipping out the measuring tape took me out 💀
Haven't seen this part yet but I'm already chuckling 😭
Same and the way my JAW DROPPED
That’s a REALLY big baby! Scarily big
I had to rewatch that part I was dying 😂😂😂😂
THIS. Like WHERE did she pull that tape measure from?! I’ve watched it back like 4 times now and I’m convinced at this point that she conjured it on the spot lol.
This Drea girl's got amaaaazing energy. You've been collabing with such good guests recently Morgan, congrats!
i just met her but i adore her!!! she's so funny and sweet
“she’s not a bridezilla” right she just wants to control the entirety of the wedding ceremony down to what the grooms wears
So every single bride in existence
STOP. I had to pause and comment. I work in HR and the pregnancy story has me LIVID. I hope that poor woman reports ALL THOSE PEOPLE. That is retaliation. Retaliation is ILLEGAL. I would be actioning ANYONE who exacerbated this situation that this woman should not have gone through in the first place. OMG.
Edit: She needs to document EVERY time someone said ANYTHING to her that made her uncomfortable. What was said, who said it, when, and where. She needs to seek legal counsel or go to the EEOC, AND her HR department. A full investigation will start. She should be the one to decide if she wants to continue her employment. If not, okay, can't blame her. But if she wants her job, she has the right to continue her job IN A HARASSMENT-FREE environment. That is the goal of any HR department. We WANT to keep good employees and they deserve to work in a civil workplace. Damn I'm heated.
Edit 2: I'm assuming she's in the U.S.
Not a lawyer or hr person here but that is exactly what I said. My first thought was that she needs to sue. Baffles me that anyone would think any of this behavior is normal or healthy. I just said to myself, every single thing someone said or every email that was sent to me trying to assassinate my character, would be recorded. I would be tempted to reply, thank you for this comment. I will be including it in my lawsuit. I feel very sorry for this girl that she doesn't have a backbone. She seems like the type of person that everyone else around her has to take care of her messes because she's not strong enough to do it herself. She really needs to get some balls.
Want to add, and I did reply to someone else's comment about sueing the company, she can go after that manager in a civil suit. You will lose if you try to sue the company, UNLESS the company knew about the harassment, workplace bullying and retaliation and DID NOTHING. She reported the first manager the the company took action. Good. However, unless she reports the additional treatment she is receiving (or learns of it), the company can't act. This is why we have policies and NEED to report violations, even if it is not happening to ourselves. Bystanders' also have an obligation to report it.
@@misshell This is a hostile work environment started by the first supervisor and reinforced by the new one.
I hope she nails them in court. She deserves so much better than the crap she has had to put up with. No one deserves this treatment.
I worked in employment law for a little bit and - omg this would be so easy to prove/establish/evidence. I also rly rly hope she does.
the nigerian wedding story: literally what?? why would you get engaged to a nigerian man if you don’t like the idea of a tradional nigerian wedding😭 like i’m just like what
That’s so disrespectful, I can’t imagine doing that to someone else or having it done to me with my Mexican culture. Colonizer behavior.
That and Nigerian weddings are honestly grander affairs then in the us at least girl married into an awesome culture and acting like a wet stick
Story 3: When you marry into a multicultural relationship you accept every aspect of that person. It feels like she’s embarrassed of his background and how people will judge them at her wedding. Coming from a Korean/White-American relationship: no wedding in this circumstance.
I agree. It’s setting off alarm bells for me. They need to pause and explore this issue in therapy. Have a thorough convo about her perception(s) of his culture and what’s “inappropriate” about it.
100% this! At this stage in their relationship, I feel like talking about what you're going to wear to your wedding is something you've talked about before even getting engaged? My husband is from a cattle ranching family. It was VERY important to him that he got to wear a cowboy hat at our wedding. I was happy that he wanted to wear something that was important to his family/culture. I would have NEVER contested this request. It was even fun to shop for the hat together! We ended up with a gorgeous matte black Stetson that we got fitted just for him!
Coming from a Chinese-Malaysian who married a white-American, the bride made me so mad! We had a traditional tea ceremony during our rehearsal dinner where I wore a red wedding Qipao. While my husband did not want to wear a Chinese set himself, he was more than happy to wear the matching bow tie that I bought for him. My family was so happy with us incorporating my culture into the wedding and my in-laws were excited to participate.
@@Taewills Honestly, I wouldn't even explore this in therapy. It'd be a dealbreaker - especially if kids are on the table.
@@diamcole personally, same. I’m at a stage in life where I don’t deal with nonsense/ intolerance. Anything less than an embrace is a turnoff. That goes for fam/friends and romantic prospects.
But OP doesn’t sound willing to let go so hopefully through conversing about his fiancé’s biases, a lightbulb will ignite in his brain.
Story 2 “you get it girl you deserve someone hot” so does the op of the story 😅
Story 4: ALL OF THEM SHOULD BE REPORTED TO HR!!! TO HELL WITH ALL OF THEM!!! All of them need to be sued. Poor OP. She has a golden hubby. Bless the husband and OP. To hell with that whole office. She's not just senditive, nice, and kind. She was a doormat, and the office took advantage of that. Being nice does not mean being a doormat, and vice-versa.
Morgan has such a warm, cozy, and inviting personality that makes people so comfortable. I love seeing new guests come in and start off trying to adjust, then towards the end of the episode, always being so sad to hear it's the last story.
I've peeped it in multiple shows, as soon as they hear "last story," they say things like: nooo or voice disappointment on it being over. I remember a guest even asked for an extra one. It was so sweet!!
As a British Nigerian have to say Drea is my favourite guest ever. Thank you for introducing her to me. Re the wedding one, imo he's being really kind by only asking for him to wear traditional wear. I couldn't be with someone who can't understand my culture
Right?! I was shocked that there was zero conversation about the second wedding. They don’t share the same values. She doesn’t “want him to stick out”
As a white 30-something Canadian dude, Drea is also my favourite guest ever. Her vibe is magnificent.
Yet in ur very statement, u ignore western culture . Weddings in the west are about the bride. Why does SHE have to change her culture for him? Why not he change for her ? Why does it automatically fall on the western women , we are allowed culture too. Grow up
@@nameunavailable-gp3ot Western marriages are about the couple, not the bride. It's a union of two people and he deserves a say too. If you're thinking about getting married, maybe you need to grow up and realise that a ceremony uniting two people isn't just about you.
If the GF is uncomfortable sitting there while OP feeds her baby, the GF can walk out of the room until after she is done feeding the baby. It should have been as simple as that!
Edit: just got to the part they said this 😂😂😂
Story 6(?): 11 months. Food before 1 is just for fun. Breastfeeding (or formula) is very important for babies under 1 year of age, no matter how tall or big.
well not just for fun, they also get hungrier the bigger they get and their stomachs grow. milk alone won't keep them full. baby food is to get them used to new tastes and has nutrients and then solids are for real food so they can stay longer and have enough nutrients to support their growth and development. milk is important still until they're about 2 but it won't do much for them after that.
@teamlining7685 Sure, but it's mostly exploration and not if they don't eat their dinner they starve. They'll still get milk in some form. Some babies don't even have teeth until they're 1 year.
as someone who is 19, I would be emotionally mature enough to at the LEAST walk away if I was uncomfy. A baby is a baby no matter the size, 11 months old is a literal baby. 100% agree with you
@@teamlining7685a babies stomach at one year is the size of their fist, still not very big. But I do agree they do get hungrier so it is good to introduce food younger at the end of the day it’s still good to do what works for the baby and you. It’s still an 11 month old baby
@@mckennamcelhiney9604right as a gf i could NOT imagine
PLEASEEEE BRING THIS GIRL BACKKKK!!!! Her energy, her takes, her in general it’s giving 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 Loved this episode!
my first reaction on the 1st story was "why she married him?" 😂😂😂
You'd be surprised how much someone can change or let their hair down after marriage or long term commitment. Or when they become a dad. You have no idea.
@@victorywalkingtours8843 well thats worse for op because it means he changed for the worse by repeteadly doing somth that bothers op. So he doesnt care about her and gaslight her into thinking hes not being loud....
@@marianatraductoraargentina trust me, I know very well
@victorywalkingtours8843 OP made a comment on the original post that he's always been that way.
Maybe he JUST started this...like that 1 story where the boyfriend started speaking in a fake Italian accent 😭
Story 2: I was so shocked by your reaction 😮 This woman changer her entire personality and appearance, it’s completely valid for his partner to not be attracted to her anymore. She changer the way she eats, the way she looks, her habits… and those things come together with dressing different, maybe not eating with his husband because she wants to fast or eat her special diet, be focused on gym and spend a lot of time there (if she developed ‘manly’ shoulders she must be there a lot). All of this makes a person different.
I agree with you so much. I also feel like Morgan would normally side with this kind of story.. if she has changed everything about herself including her personality then he has every right to feel like he’s with a different person to who he married and if he doesn’t feel attracted to her anymore then he is doing the correct thing by leaving… people change and fall out of love all the time. It doesn’t make you am asshole. If this was a woman writing about a man it would be totally different. I normally agree with Morgan but this time I feel like she’s agreeing with her guest too much like she doesn’t want to offend her by disagreeing with her… but that’s just my hot take 😊
I see your point, but I think that love shouldn't be conditional, and if you truly love someone, you will love them no matter how their appearance changes because you do not only love them for their body but their heart and inside beauty as well which is more important. And if he is so easily grossed now, he would have probably done the same when they get older even if she didn't change.
@@WeeMeg88This is common with Morgan. Every once in a while she'll bring on some weird guest with terrible takes, and will just passively agree with them.
He never said she changed her personality it was about her looks and him not being attracted to her. If he had a problem with her eating and gym habits he could have said something earlier and not just spring divorces on her. Also was their marriage just about looks and physical attraction? I can’t believe yall are trying to defend this shallow take💀
@@daluogbuefi9480 Shallow sympathizes with shallow. These aren't people who are dating. They are married with kids. 30lbs after having babies is not some drastic change. Breast reductions are done for pain relief. This guy is a complete manipulative tool as he accused her of not loving her children for making the changes she did. Anybody defending this can pound sand. Divorcing her is doing her a favor because now she is free to find someone who deserves her.
For the Nigerian groom, the brides whole argument is that he will “stick out” in his traditional Nigerian attire…but don’t you want that? Shouldn’t the bride and groom be the center of attention at their wedding? This is why brides wear white. Having him in something unique sounds like perfect to me, so they both have everyone’s eyes on them
Absolutely agree!
Is he the only Nigerian person that will be there because if he’s not, they will probably dress up in their traditional clothing also. Crazy. He wouldn’t stand out at all.
the baby didn't ask to be humongous! 😭
2:18 AM upload time is so fitting for this podcast lol
I’m a little night owl :)
Lmao for me it was at like 4 or 5 am
Story 2: I usually agree with your takes Morgan but this one has me flabbergasted. It’s not toxic to no longer be attracted to your partner once they’ve drastically changed their appearance. Imagine if he had decided to get a huge face tattoo, would she be the AH for no longer being attracted to him? He never said he didn’t still love her at the core, he’s just no longer physically attracted to her and that’s okay. It sounds like he went about it in the best way he could’ve, he wasn’t mean or bitter about it just truthful. It feels wrong to call him toxic when he can’t control what he’s attracted to. Also, a lot assumptions were unfairly made about OP - claiming he’s insecure, or out of shape and jealous of the attention his wife is getting when we don’t even have enough context to know if that’s true or not.
@@itsalovelybae thank you!! that story was handled so poorly and it was painful to watch!
Thank you thank you thank you. I was so surprised not to see more of this but I guess the labor story was the shock factor here.
Watching this story now and thinking the same, at the core it is just them growing apart rather than together and doesn't seem like she is doing things in a very healthy way but each to their own if that is what is making her happier.
Totally agree with you. I don’t agree with them saying the guy has no right. It should be a collective thing as in all marriages. If tables were turned, they would be berating the husband for sure. One of the worse takes I’ve heard on this pod.
this was exactly my take too!!!! im so glad more people agree, i felt kinda bad for OP....
Yessss morgan please more BLACK PERSPECTIVES on this showw❣️❣️ (as a black viewer we appreciate it😂)
Girl, every time Morgan talks about her wedding plans she adds new crazy things and it fun just listening to what she wants to do lmaoooo. All the best for the big day and the many ones after❤❤
Story 4: She needs to report it to HR…she has a inhospitable work environment. That behavior needs to be documented as it will lead to a lawsuit if they don’t handle it properly
Love this co-host. Thanks for the introduction. When you said "Okay last one." And Drea responded with the cutest "Nooo" it was adorable. Please have her back on in the future.
Hot take for story 3: she is a bridezilla. He mentioned giving his fiancée full rein of the planning because "that's what she wanted." Depsite him nit really caring, he gave input for this ONE THING that has to do with his culture. And she vetoed it. She might not be trying to change people's hair colors or have tattoos covered, but she wants to American-ize further and not let his culture shine.
Testify marriage is a team sport both people need a voice
@@Billywashere89 I could never imagine my partner feeling like he had to almost beg to incorporate their culture. A wedding and marriage is about the couple becoming one. Not one person.
Why does she have to sacrifice a western wedding culture for his ? Why doesn't he embrace her culture of the bride being the center of attention?
@@nameunavailable-gp3ot he isn't asking her to sacrifice the whole thing. He is asking to wear a piece of traditional clothing that his culture wears on their wedding day.
@@abbykelley6844 ye I certainly over reacted , just get tired of hypocrisy, western weddings the only thing that's really relevant is the bride being in white and standing out from everyone else , that would literaly be sacrificed by him wearing tht , now I do totally agree if I was in tht situation I'd want to include my partners culture, but at the same time he gave her complete control, if my wife told me u can chose the car go ahead its all u, then she's like why dnt we get tht car in pink wowww I'd say hell no
The one about breastfeeding: the mom is only 22. Her being 19 is no excuse for her actions. It’s recommended to breastfeed until babies are 18months-2 years now! Formula is sooo expensive. $50-$100 a week. Babies are so much more complicated than a lot people understand. I am having my second in 2 months, and some people are just uncomfortable with breastfeeding, when they’re advanced mentally, and when toddlers can eat whole foods without teeth.
yes, people who aren't educated about children should not be speaking about parenting.
Story one: I have autism & my bf has adhd so he can get very loud and it’s crazy you said get a safe word bc if I tell him ‘notches’ he will quiet down bc sometimes he’s so loud I feel like i can’t even hear him 😭😭
We have turn down volume hand signal..it's to easy to get loud from a loud family
This is my marriage in a nutshell lol. Sometimes two ND folks gel super well, and other times it's like oil and water lol.
That’s literally me with my fiance😂 I have ADHD with high functioning autism so I can get loud and he’s just a quiet reserved person and so he’ll put his hand by his head and “push” down to signal to quiet down a lil bit. Also have things for in the car when I’m not paying attention.
Me and my boyfriend just live in noise cancelling headphones
@@___FS___have a look at loop earplugs, they quieten down the noise around you and they just sit in your ear
Story 7: consequences of your actions!! Shouldn’t have cheated. You don’t get to spend two weeks with what almost ended your marriage
FOR FUCKING REALL
Exactly!!! That’s what I was thinking. Like this wouldn’t have been an issue if he didn’t cheat. But he did so he has to deal with his wife’s valid feelings and thoughts.
that and if he just told HR about his relation with her they wouldn't have put him on the trip with her
the way my mouth dropped when morgan took out the measuring tape... oh hell no
Phew story 6 hit close to home. My daughter is tall, very tall. Like 95 percentile for height. People make wild assumptions about how kids/toddlers/babies should act regardless of height (but I think seeing a tall or big baby doesn’t help). I was pushing my toddler in a stroller one day and an old man said, in passing, “that kid is too big to be pushing em”. Like??
Also, there’s so much shame with breast feeding or not breast feeding. It seems like no matter what a parent does they either didn’t breast feed long enough, breast fed for too long, shouldn’t have switched to formula, or should have used formula. There’s no winning. 😮💨
My middle child was small when he was 5-6 and riding a two wheeler. People always said, oh, he’s so good, riding a 2 wheeler. That only lasts until I tell them his age. 😂
For the first story, I feel like the husband is actually kind of a jerk. Even if he doesn’t feel like he’s loud, his partner is ADAMANT that he’s too loud and that it is causing her discomfort. He should respect that he’s too loud for his partner, even if he doesn’t see it, and he needs to be respectful of what she needs.
I was thinking this too! My boyfriend is also a bit on the noisy side but he genuinely doesn’t notice. If I say something though he always apologizes and tries to quiet down. The problem with the husband in story 1 is his reaction to her discomfort
the pregnancy story: i would’ve went into work after maternity leave for the last time and brought cupcakes for everyone that had laxatives in them. have fun trying to sit through your meeting when ur trying not to shut yourself lol
Story 2 - Aging is not the same as plastic surgery. I think it's valid to be unattracted to your partner after plastic surgery. It's not a gradual change like aging. It's not natural. And it can change someone's looks drastically. With that said, yes, the person who owns the body gets to decide what they do with that body. But it's ok if it takes him a bit to get used to the physical changes.
I get him really, but I feel like it isn't even that major of a surgery?? From what he tells it's just her body that has slightly changed. I remember one story from Reddit about a man who was not attracted to his wife after her multiply getting a lot of face surgeries (I believe he said she started looking like handsome Squidward or smth lol), and even there he tried to rekindle their relationship. Breaking up over changes in the body (and especially boobs, oh my god) seems really shallow to me.
@@StasyaWorm + It's not just breaking up, they're married and have children! Also, as far as I know and I'm definitely not a gym girl, doing some weights does NOT give you "men" shoulders. It's hard as fuck to gain muscles in such exaggerated way. He's an asshole. Still, it is tricky because he can't really control his physical attraction; as much as he loves her personality (which the post doesn't really show... He only talks about looks and a possible ED), if he doesn't find himself loving her anymore there is no "trying to fix it", imo. He's probably doing her a favor in the long run if he does end up going for divorce.
she didnt get plastic surgery. she got a reduction. thats cosmetic surgery. Plastic surgery is COMPLETELY different. she literally just started working out, eating better, and got a reduction. none of that is plastic surgery
@@StasyaWormno, he said these are drastic changes to the point he can’t recognize her. Could be an exaggeration but what if he’s not into the body builder physic? What are his options? I don’t get why that makes him TA.
but it wasnt a typical plastoc surgery. it was breast reduction. most women get those to mitigate pain
The 2nd one said the guy felt he was no longer attracted to his wife and he's an asshole for wanting to leave but then you go and talk about the young girl with an old man who are separating and saying 'go girl, you deserve someone hot', different circumstances I know but it still feels contradictory. Like others have said it's nothing to do with a slow aging process, it's not his fault he's no longer attracted to his wife, would she not rather be with someone who is attracted to her new body type? No dis on her for changing her body but it's not his fault he's no longer attracted to her.
@@sophieharrison2282 No. He is an AH because he is trying to manipulate the readers with his version. 1) There is nothing drastic about losing 30lbs especially after having 3 children. 2) They don't just perform breast reductions. You have to have a documented medical history of pain from the breasts. Breast reductions aren't performed to make breasts not saggy. That is a breast lift. If she is no longer breast feeding they probably have just shrunk down to what they were before they were engorged with milk. 3) You cannot starve yourself and build enough muscle to have man shoulders. It is difficult for men to put in muscle mass none the less a female. Neither are doing it without eating a ton of food. 4) This manipulative POS accused her of not loving her children because she has taken care of her body in a way he didn't approve of. She is taking care of herself, not neglecting herself. She is not neglecting her children. HE is putting how attractive he finds it above his family.
This is because he has already been cheating and he is making it HER fault.
THE SET LOOKS INCREDIBLE MORGAN!!!!!
as a person with social anxiety, Drea's insight and advice on the pregnancy/job meeting situation actually opened up my eyes a bit -- "in this life all you have is yourself".. gonna be my new motto for whenever im afraid to stand up for myself ❤️
Your new studio is insane, Morgan. And you definitely deserve it. ❤
We totally DIYED it! Thanks Dad and Justin :)
Nigeria was colonized by the British majority of Nigerians speak English along with their tribal languages. @@TwoHotTakes
Story 2: No AH here. I completely understand losing physical attraction. I also think the complete lifestyle change is rubbing him the wrong way and not just the fact that she's changed physically. But it's normal to cry and be resentful, angry and devastated by divorce. It's normal for some friends to drop you and villainise you in these situations. It's just how people react. Hope the hate comments stop though. Neither of the couple are wrong in my opinion. He can leave, and she is allowed to be devastated and wish she'd never met him.
I'm confused why he says that she doesn't care about their children though. There was no context for that, and that makes me wonder what other details we aren't getting.
based take
Story 4 has me HEATED not America wanting to force women to have babies and then this is how they are treated when they do? Men in the workplace acting like that?? Disgusting
They’re trying to force us back into dependency like our great grandmothers. Eventually out of the workplace too
who is forcing women to have babies
@@lebowskisrug The law!!
@@premierebuerger4553 no abortion is legal in many US states
@@lebowskisrug lol you live under a rock or something?
Story number two is NTA. We would NEVER tell a woman to stay with a man who she was not longer attracted to- we would never tell a woman to stay with a man who turned into a gym rat to a point of unhealthy (not eating for a day every couple days is unhealthy) attraction is a key part in a relationship.
This. The fact that they both skipped over the fact that she would skip eating?! LOSING 30 POUNDS BC OF THAT? ... Good god
To the woman who's trying not to rock the boat: If you can't do it for yourself, do it for the other people who might be put in your position in the future. I often find that if you take yourself out of the aquation, it's easier to seek the right justice.
Edit: Glad their was a commentor on reddit with the same sentiment.
29:29 someone tell this bride to be that her groom is supposed to stand out as it’s HIS WEDDING TOO. His future wife seems to not care about what her future husband wants and needs.
I can't believe you've been giving us 2 hour podcasts for years now EVERY WEEK 🥺🥺 Thank you!! 💖
And still when she says "last story", Im like why so soon!
I think Morgan can lol poor gal is always burned out
@@alexshaw8167 🥺 I wish she knew she could just take a month long break and we wouldn’t go anywhere
@@maloumasereel966 You are so so kind. I'm actually doing a lot better! Having ponies again is helping so so much
@@TwoHotTakes I’m sooo glad! 🩷 Aren’t horses the best 😭
Never comment on videos but Drea is literally so funny she is cracking me up lmaooo
The story about being in labor at work…sue. Blast them. One of my friends LOST HER BABY because her job wouldn’t let her leave even though she knew something was wrong. The company is one that suing would almost be pointless. A big big big company in an industry that covers things up left and right. I hate this for OP.
56:48 Oh it MUST be about the money. THIS is the best way to send a message to a company. They don't care about you, your health, your kids. The only thing that can make them change anything IS money
story six is crazy because at 19 I would know to just sit somewhere else if someone was sitting where I wanted to sit, especially in a nursing mom…
no like morgan and drea have too much grace. i am a current 19 year old and i know how to not have attitude and mind my business, especially when it comes to in-laws essentially. the girlfriend, instead of asking a good faith question, or simply removing herself from the space, she came in with huffing and puffing and with rudeness, so she can handle some rudeness back.
and they went out of their way to find the girlfriend’s age and completely ignored that OP said in the main story that OP is only three years older than her
teenagers are not children and know better. 19 is old enough for a lot of people to live on their own. she should know to keep her mouth shut about a mother feeding her child.
Nah dude imagine being 19 and seeing a 3 ft tall 10 month old baby? I can’t imagine that at 26. And then seeing it breastfed the first time you meet the sister? That’s a weird and unique situation and 19 is still super immature to experience that lol give her some grace
Exactly! The teenager being uncomfortable is HER problem. It is completely normal for an 11 month old to still breastfeed l. OP is definitely NOT the asshole
STORY 3!! I literally had to stop my car to comment. I married into the Middle Eastern culture and had two weddings. And Never. NEVER, would I deny my husband his cultural celebrations!! Plus, GUYS, non-western traditions are so so beautiful. So rich! It made me love him more seeing him celebrate with his family. If she doesn’t end up seeing his side I would say, leave her. She’s not going to be able to keep Nigerian traditions alive with their children if she doesn’t even respect them now. Also, if she was being denied a western wedding…. like bffr
Story2 : Look, I don’t think it’s wrong to no longer be attracted to someone after they undergo a complete transformation. Also It’s not good if he just bottles it up and lives in misery. Also not sure where all those assumptions about his character came from. One last thing , This reminded me of the story where a man was no longer attracted to his wife after she had plastic surgeries (buckle fat removal etc.) and your reaction was totally different. Just wondering what make you decide this time around it wasn’t justifiable
I wondered why the different opinion this time as well… it does seem that he would “trade her in” given that he didn’t like that she looked, by some people’s standards, better.
I love Morgan & the pod, but she absolutely morphs her opinions & attitudes to match her guests which makes her come across inconsistent and sometimes outright ignorant. It’s an issue becoming more frequent in recent months.
@@therealgumdrop I think the difference might be that in the other case the woman changed her face completely, she didn't get one surgery, there were several procedures on her face and body, whereas in this case was just a breast reduction, and exercise
i’m with you on this. people can change themselves for themselves. HOWEVER, we don’t get to dictate how our partner reacts. we all want someone that we are not just attracted to mentally, but also physically. it doesn’t make you shallow. most people that say, “i don’t care about looks” aren’t being honest with themselves. it happens on catfish all the time. if he’s no longer attracted to her he will start acting differently like the other story. then he’s the bad guy because he’s not attracted to her anymore. it’s always so quick to blame the man.
then they talk about the young girl that is “upgrading” from her older husband and that’s fine?! okay.
The wife from that story did extreme fad plastic surgery to remove the fact from her face. Breast reduction to address saggy breasts and buccal fat removal are drastically different in results, one can and often does go into uncanny valley territory and it’s not the reduction.
The last story with her friends saying she’s overreacting- the other woman is in the same friend group/social group! Their alliances might not be with the OP!
story 2 - but if he gained 300 more pounds and became morbidly obese, would she be the AH for not being attracted to him anymore? of course not, so i don’t see how this is any different. idk why we like to pretend like physical attraction doesn’t matter or we don’t have preferences. after concerns have been made & conversations have been had and shut down repeatedly/not taken seriously, what else is there to be done atp? i would never want someone i love to force themselves to be physically attracted to me just to protect my own feelings. especially if i knew i looked good wtf.
Are you fr comparing losing 30 pounds to gaining 300? What's the logic here??
Also yeah, she would be the AH. Not for not being attracted anymore, but for not trying to help him become healthy again and just dipping out.
@@gae_uwuI don’t think it’s just about her loosing 30 pounds. I think it also has to do with the fact that she did a 180 personality flip and also with her entire life. I know for a fact if I would do a complete flip of who I am and become a muscle mommy, my partner wouldn’t be attracted to me. In all honesty, that is okay! Everyone has likes and dislikes everyone has preferences. If you completely change who you are inside and out the person who fell in love with you before this flip may fall out of love. I personally feel there’s no assholes. She’s doing her and he can’t help how he feels. They shouldn’t stay in a relationship they aren’t happy in. They should go and find partners that make them happy. Also with having kids mixed in, it’s best to split if you aren’t happy with the relationship. It will end up causing resentment and kids pick up on that.
@@alexi5903you can change your lifestyle without changing your personality…it doesnt sound like she did that. she changed the way she ate and the way she worked out. thats quite literally it. he barely even brought up her personality.
@@gae_uwuit really doesn’t matter what she did, she can change whatever she wants to, it’s her body. she could of gotten 10 tattoos, pierced her entire face, and shaved all her hair off, at the end of the day he’s no longer physically attracted. the praise of her weight loss and “she would be the AH but for not helping him be healthy again” is so ironic because she’s been adopting unhealthy eating behaviors from the internet to become “healthy”. you can talk to someone about something they’re doing all day long but if they don’t see an issue with it and they don’t want to change, all you can do is remove yourself from the situation and stop wasting each others time.
If I noticed my partner gaining a bunch of weight I wouldn't leave them lol, I would try to encourage an healthier lifestyle cause I want them to live longer and still be with me
Story 7 - I'm over here scratching my head as to WHY he didn't just freaking disclose the affair?? That's very suspicious to me! I would be more gracious to him if he was upfront from the getgo. I don't think they'd send them together if they knew? Am I crazy for doubting his motives because of this?
I was wondering that too. I get it would make it weird with his coworkers at first, but he should have told HR about their history when she started working with him.
I think the husband is making up some of this story or hiding details. She starts working there and he is “forced” to spend all this time with her? No, he is not as pure as he is acting.
Exactly. Yes it would make it awkward to explain to every one that you cheated, but that's the cost of an affair. It should have been disclosed up front.
Story two: he’s not the asshole. Psychologist here. So you partner changes completely and he’s the asshole because he’s falling out of love? That is a very toxic take, you two seemed to miss that it seems like she did not change only her looks, it’s clear by the story but even if it was only that, he still has the right to not be atracted just like she has the right to change herself. There are no assholes here, in life people change and sometimes we are not for each other anymore.
English is not my first language so sorry.
It's NAH for me. I don't think she's wrong for wanting to change herself and I don't think he's wrong for falling out of love. Although, I do find some of the language he used to describe the way she looks now to be interesting (she has a man's shoulders, etc.) - seems like the best thing that could have happened, happened. Now they can be with people who they feel values them.
Yep I agree but also I feel like the way he described here was really weird and kind of shallow... And I think there would be a lot more ways to approach this issue and maybe he needed to try to renew their spark or go to couples counseling. Also her dieting that strictly looks like ED to be honest... I completely understand that generally you don't even need a big enough reason to leave to justify your breakup if you're simply unhappy in your relationship, but the whole story doesn't seem right to me
Yes I agree! He’s allowed to not be attracted any more. And she is allowed to change. No assholes.
I also found it weird how Morgan the guest tried to twist it into him being jealous and having an ego when all he talked about was his personal attraction to his wife. He also never talked about getting attention or his personal looks and they just make assumptions to justify their take
@@blingblaow3251 I think the assumptions of ego playing a part in it was due to how he worded some sections of his post. Ego can definitely show up in attraction and that’s not inherently bad, it can show up in different ways.
I think it’s so cute how when Morgan announced the last story Drea was like “No… why” 😂
Story 1: the frustrating root of the issue is: sounds like he doesn't care about how other people feel and want to be considerate. He doesn't think he's loud so he just wants to be right and make zero effort, instead of making his partner and others feel more comfortable.
@@KZesty 100% this! The issue isn’t the volume anymore, it’s the disrespect and self-absorbed attitude of the husband!
i think he might just be neurodivergent and doesn’t understand volume control. i actually struggle with the exact same thing of being too loud my entire life.
@@lebowskisrug She has explained it to him numerous times though.
@@Lannie85 yes… and so have other people to me… i’m not saying he’s right but it’s hard to not be loud when you naturally are just loud. she should’ve known he was a loud person before. you cant see things in someone you don’t like but then think “oh i can fix him”.
OP said she is only three years older than the girlfriend who is 19. That is not a big difference in maturity.
Story 5 reminds me of that one reddit story where the OP wrote about being disappointed that his son wasn't black, so he couldn't share black culture. The OP was white and his wife and mother of his child was black. The OP went on about always being into stereotypical "black" things. His and the wife's baby came out looking exactly like him. Skin tone, eyes, hair color. I remember that he brought up that his wife was questioned about being the child's nanny, who the kid's mom was, constantly because the kid LOOKED completely white. That wasn't the major upsetting thing for OP, though. It was that he couldn't teach "black culture" to the kid, for some reason.
The reason this story reminds me of that one is because of OP's problem with what his friend and his partner decided to name their child. In the story i mentioned, OP talked about not seeing a point in his wife buying their son black dolls, introducing him to books with black characters, etc. because the kid was "white" (ignoring that the child is biracial, even if he looks more like the white OP/father in that story).
I love Drea’s personality 😂😂😂 “oh that’s a twist” she said lol she’s so cute
Story 2, It's great she improved herself by her own standards. Her body her choice. He has all the rights to leave her over it. His body his choice.
Exactly!!
100% but these are the same people who would call a man a bigot because he wouldn't date a trans woman. Guarantee of the roles were reversed in this story, their opinion would be completely opposite. Love the podcast and have listened to every episode, but the hosts are hypocrites.
Yes exactly if he's not attracted to her anymore he can leave, propably better for both
Story 2: if she can do anything she wants with her body since it’s her choice, I think it’s fair for the husband to exercise his right to leave the marriage if attraction is gone.
Story 2: Not everyone is attracted to muscular woman. I think that’s the crux of the issue, she’s now too muscular and her breast reduction might have made her look even more muscular.
There’s also a lifestyle shift that a lot of people don’t jive with. Especially if she only eats “healthy foods” and fasts multiple times a week - that can be incompatible with people who aren’t interested in health and fitness, who would rather go out and try new restaurant or order in a pizza and watch a movie.
I definitely get losing weight and loving yourself (I lost 80 lbs and got cosmetic surgery after weight loss), but it can be difficult to be with someone who keeps a strict fitness and dietary regimen, which is why you typically see them date and marry people who keep a similar lifestyle.
I immediately was siding with OP on story too because I don't care for the whole "gym is life" thing. I also am not physically attracted to overly muscular men.
Congrats on your weight loss!
Please have Drea on again!! Her energy is amazing and I love hearing hear talk, I love you guys together!
I second this!!!
about the last story - He took the decision to cheat on her and has to now accept the consequences. These problems at work wouldn’t exist if he didn’t cheat on her in the first place. He has to suck it up and find a solution by himself.
And if he had also disclosed the relationship to his company as he should have in the beginning. At this point he has a track record for being deceitful
THESE WERE MY EXACT THOUGHTS!!! like oh you were embarrassed to tell your company you had an affair?? you could’ve you know, just not fucking cheated my guy,, every single point OP made was a direct result of his selfish and callous actions. he did cheat. he did lie by omission. he should face the consequences and this woman shouldn’t have to question herself, he should’ve made the choice for them both immediately upon hearing about this trip, or even told the company right away when she started. he sounds spineless and she deserves better. also she needs better friends because who in their right fucking non-internalized misogyny mind would actually think she’s overreacting??
@lindseygarciafreiberg I bet they'd act the same or worse if they were in her shoes.
@@RD-ok5pc oh absolutely
Had to skip story 2, the double standard was too annoying. A partner drastically changing life style is a valid reason for separation. "She's starting her health journey" when he wrote that she sometimes doesn't eat at all for a day. Nah, it's not about being a supportive partner, it's way more complicated than that. Reverse the gender and we'd all be hating on that "gym bro" vibe.
Thank you! I’m not sure if a gender swap would change anything for me, but I agree about a lifestyle change being a good reason for seperation. He describes her as being a completely different person than the person he married. That might not be true, but for all we know it is. Why all the stupid assumptions?? That annoyed me most. Glad I’m not the only one who started skipping at 18.30… I know Morgan does her best and I love her, but this is one of those things I hope the reads all the comments on and gets back to us about in a future episode, because this is so out of pocket for her. She is normally very good at keeping random assumptions out of the conversation I think.
THANK YOU! you cant say her body her choice (which it is) but on the same breath say he HAS to find her atractive. He too has a right to his feelings. and i agree it goes deeper, its probably not just the physical apearance if she changed their whole dynamic.. you cant blame him.
I think it more of the context of how the husband described the wife. It was very disrespectful. Plus the reasoning was very superficial op didn’t state any behavioral changes just diet and appearance. Morgan even gave them the benefit of the doubt and even said maybe food was type of bonding experience for the couple but even OP didn’t mention it. I don’t think it a fair comparison to say it’s a double standard because then it’d be more along the lines of my partner looks more feminine when I married a masculine man?
dont think guy 2 is an asshole at all, he tried his best to continue loving his wife but sexual attraction is a real thing and he just wasnt attracted to her anymore. Shes totally in her right to love herself and embrace her new health and fitness but hes also in his right to be not be attracted to that. I also think it has to do with their personalities along with physical though because maybe with all these new found hobbies shes also changed as a person. again thats not a bad thing but they might just be at 2 different points in their life now
I'm just kind of wondering if she ever talked to him about it. Like I would probably want to get my husband's opinions and I think we could make decisions together. If you really love the other person you'd be more open.
Honestly, though I don’t know what’s up with Morgan and her double standards lately but I literally am about to unsubscribe imagine if it was the other way around she’d be like yeah girl you go get a better looking man….
@@surramott5862don’t let the door hit you on your way out 😂
@@jordan33333 does your comment make you feel better about yourself ❤️ I hope so. Sorry I advocate for men just as much as women❤️
@@surramott5862as long as the woman isn’t Morgan?
Story 4 needs to lawyer up! She needs to file a formal complaint as she is now being punished by the entire office for standing up for her rights.
Story 3: the traditional outfits are GORGEOUS! I just watched Emily and Kobe wedding on 90 day fiance and my jaw was on the floor. They looked so beautiful in their traditional style. I want to go to a wedding like that so badly!
i’m only 30 minutes in and i LOVE Drea, her energy, sense of humor, and perspectives are so great. i’m so gonna follow her on other platforms and would love to see her on THT again :)
I feel so incomplete with out an update on some of the stories lol I need a “best of Reddit update” episode where it’s only completed stories 🤣
Story 3- “she’s not a bridezilla, she just wants everything done exactly her way and I don’t get any say at all in anything”
ooookay my guy….
As an interior decorator, I kept getting distracted by how amazing the new set looks 😂😂
Hot take here, but story 2 is fair enough.. for some people, attraction is a massive requirement in a relationship, which also effects the sexual chemistry.
He may feel threatened by her weight loss and new muscle somewhat but he could also just not be attracted to the muscle or weight loss.
Further to this, people who diet and lift weights can live a different life in regards to food/activity, which he clearly doesn't enjoy himself or resonates with. If he doesn't want to be with someone he has nothing in common with anymore, then that's his choic, and it's fine to make that choice.
She will now be free to find someone that treasures her for how she is now.
For story 2 i dont think hes the ah if your not attracted to something your not attracted he cant really force it and yes she has every right to get healthy and love herself but he also has a right to how he feels plus if hes not attracted to a muscular women than they probably wont have a good smex life anymore and thats important for a happy relationship
This^. I was going to say the same thing.
thissssssssssssss
On the other hand actors dehydrate themselves to have definition for the shoot, to show off those gains better, and lose them in between while taking a break with plenty of water and nutrition, while still being in shape. Wife goes hard to increase metabolism and burn away stubborn long term fat stores rn, so may look cut or unevenly malnourished. Maybe after hitting her target weight or slimming the most problematic places she will switch to healthy upkeep and some softness will return. We don't know what her boobs and health problems with them were. Maybe they caused chronic back pain and prevented excercising, maybe they were comically big and now still huge just not affecting quality of life as much. Or maybe its the Nutty Professor situation where same results of him trying to get in shape looked completely different before and after fat melting potion
Completely agreed. Not one is obligated to stay in a marriage where they are unhappy. He is unhappy.
it takes years to lose and gain that much muscle.. it sounds like he never communicated with her and just decided one day to leave. he also talks about her horribly, who says the woman that they’re married to has “man shoulders” tf
We need her back, the vibes are OFF THE CHARTS with you two!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Was the saying Morgan was thinking of in the first story possibly going to be "you made your own bed, now lie in it?"
Omg yessss
As my sister says, “you opened that can of worms, now lie in it” 😂
Maybe he JUST started this...like that 1 story where the boyfriend started speaking in a fake Italian accent 😭
I die a little inside every time she uses a saying wrong.
We say “You dug your own grave, now lie in it” where I’m from 😂
Just wanted to let you know your show has brought so much inspiration and happiness into my life. I know it might sound silly, but especially on the days I am in the dumps, and I see a new video posted I get so excited because it’s 2 hours I can let my mind relax and just listen. Some of the stories you have read have really actually knocked some sense into me. I’m going through a lot right now, and I’m so grateful for what you share with us! Please don’t ever stop. And please please come to Niagara Falls, Ontario Canada one day. I’ll be the first to buy a ticket! ❤
Story 2: why should someone suffer because you don’t like how you look? I don’t think someone should be forced to be with someone just bc they were attracted to them at one point. I’m on a weight loss journey and if my man didn’t support it and wasn’t attracted to me anymore I would wish for him to tell me instead of suffer and just not be attracted to me but still have sex or whatever.. like it’s not balding as you get older or sagging as you get older …
Right? If my partner ever stopped being attracted to me I'd rather he broke up with me and let me find someone who did
In the 2nd story, to be fair to OP, not all people/men are attracted to muscles. In my 20's, after a breakup, I drop 20+ lbs and became very lean and muscular. My bf and I got back together but he HATED that I lost weight and was now muscular. He constantly brought home junk food in an attempt to make me gain weight. We argued a LOT about the food I would no longer eat. Bottom line, everyone have preferences or looks they are or are not attracted to. If you're with your true person, you can probably work through it. I can understand that OP isn't attracted to his wife's new look. Generally-speaking, men hope that their wife don't change. I'm not saying that I agree, but I do understand.
Story 2, I don’t think he’s an AH.
People want to pretend like they’re not shallow in some form or another but we ALL are! We all have preferences and we all find certain things attractive or not attractive. If my partner was to walk through the front door tonight with a Skin head and a Gym Bro’s body, I’d probably vomit in my mouth a little and be instantly put off. Like if I was to lose a ton of weight and dye my hair blonde, he wouldn’t be impressed at all. Looks ARE important; you can scream that they’re not all day long but they are. You may have gotten with your partner for other reasons, but over the years you become accustomed to how they look. And if that was to drastically change and it changed the way you views them and you couldn’t get past it. What do you do? Stay and be unattracted to them for the rest of your life? Knowing you’re not happy and everything in your life is going to change. No, you tell them, you talk through it and if your can’t sort out they problems you have, you leave.
He’s not wrong for what he’s doing. Staying with someone you’re not happy with, ESPECIALLY when you have kids is seriously unhealthy. It’s just that this is looks based that everyone is going to jump on him. It’s not right in my opinion.
Not being attracted to your partner anymore because they’ve completely switched up who they were when you married them ISNT TOXIC.
What is toxic is labelling a man as such and saying “he’s insecure!”. That is wild to me.
If this was a woman saying her partner got fat and she doesn’t love him anymore you’d all be screaming leave him, do you, be happy, from the rooftops. 🤮
As soon as I heard the start of this story I thought "oh boy. Two hot takes is about to be two shit takes."
@@husky8204right. Same, as soon as the tagline was read my eyes immediately rolled into the back of my head and I knew it was about to be a pile on.
with a similar scenario in another story, Morgan had a different opinion, she just changes depending on the guest.
@@marybbc1727that story was completely different. major plastic surgeries are vastly different than working out and a breast reduction. they are not the same
@@marybbc1727that story was completely different bffr. gaining muscle is not the same as getting 5 plastic surgeries. in that story, they argued about wether or not she should get the surgeries for an entire year before her mother gave her the money and pressured her into it, it was a drastic change right away. gaining muscle and losing 30 pounds takes years, he had so much time to discuss this with her. in the other story, he talked about how much he loved his wife but he couldn’t control what he’s attracted to sexually, in this one he just degrades her. who says the woman they love has “man shoulders”?? he seems like he doesn’t even like her.
40:28 Nigerian weddings sound GORGEOUS!!!
Morgan’s wedding sounds so fun and different. Like a great time for everyone involved.
Story 2: Yes, its her body, she can do whatever, im all for that (i want a breast lift myself btw), BUT you cant judge the guy for not being attracted to her anymore after that kind of drastic change of her looks.. Its completely normal.. After all its simple and we are just humans, not some brainded robots.
THIS! physcial attraction is human nature and we all have our likes and dislikes
For me the issue is how he’s phrasing the story. He’s justified in how he feels, but the way he talks about her body (she has “man shoulders”, saying she doesn’t care about their children when he brought up divorce, makes him come across as an asshole. You’re on the internet and you’re trying to make yourself look as good as possible and you’re still coming across as an asshole. He’s not an asshole for his feelings, but he is one for how he’s talking about them.
I agree, I was looking for a comment about this story. I think his wording and phrasing is pretty rude, but if he isn't attracted to her anymore then it's not doing either of them any favors. Physical attractiveness is not the end-all and be-all but it does factor into relationships obviously. She deserves someone that is going to think that she is beautiful and admires her body and he should be with someone that he is attracted to. He's still a jerk for the way he was thinking about her and stuff like that but it's better to just separate
😯 my face when Drea said " Where's Minnesota" 😭 Justice for MN girlies, please
holy moly im so early and wtf the studio is FIRE 🔥🔥🔥
Yay!!! I’m so glad you like it. Labor of love but I’m loving it so far
I love when drea accent switches 😂😂 as someone with many different types of immigrant friends it makes every joke 10x funnier
i had no idea who Drea is but i am SO glad this video introduced me to her. i LOVE her energy. please invite her back
This was an immaculate 2 hot takes. Your energies matches so well please make this a regular!
Drea was a fantastic guest! She was so into the stories and listened to Morgan's responses so actively. Please have her back! I have not heard of her until now, but I will follow her! Thank you for the introduction ❤
Love Drea’s energy! Such a great episode!
i can’t believe i’m so early this video was posted right at my getting ready for bed time (which may be around 3 am but it’s fineeee)
Same
For story 5, I think there are a select few times when you can give a dissenting opinion on a baby name: if it references a deplorable person (like Adolf) or if the name is made up/hard to pronounce (Gianaeffehre). But celebrating your heritage by naming a child something from your ancestors’ culture is absolutely acceptable, OP was out of line to criticize it.
🤣🤣🤣 "child birth is scary" as my due date is tomorrow 🤣🤣 thanks Morgan 😂
Wishing you all the best 🙏🏽
Wishing you a safe delivery!!
Hope you have an easy and safe delivery ❤ don’t stay in any meetings hahaha
Story 4: This story is so wild. Especially the part about the colleagues being mad that the boss's career could be jeopardized? Why do these people CARE?? The company does NOT care about you. Nobody at that company should plead their loyalty to it. It's wild that none of these grown-ass people have realized that their company is not their religion or their family or anything.
10:24 “Munchkins” and Morgan goes “Do love those donuts!” 😅😅
Story 2, my husband and I have a similar age gap, just about 5years older and married for 12years. Just before the pandemic he had weight loss surgery but it was something we discussed and I understood his reasons etc, we also had psychologist appointments where they did warn us that relationships can change and breakdown after the big appearance changes and the lifestyle and personality changes that come along with it. I don’t think he is the AH, maybe he could express it a little better but i get the feeling perhaps the $10k surgery was not very much discussed prior to the money being spent and maybe it wasn’t completely money they had free for that purpose?
He did say he tried to reconnect and get past his own feelings about it but he just dosn’t to seem to find her attractive to him anymore and if you aren’t in love with someone anymore then you both deserve the opportunity to move on.