When I was in the Navy stationed aboard the USS Enterprise, we had one guy who'd always answer the phone: "Forward torpedo room!" (Aircraft carriers don't have torpedo rooms).
1: To think that all it takes is one wrong input number to mess up someone's day. My mam got a call from someone, asking if this is was "so and so Restaurant" which she explained that they got the wrong number but fortunately for her the caller had common sense and actually apologised for the mess up before hanging up. You'd think after the first mess up and the person saying that they were not Dominoes that this Karen would get the hint and stop calling. But then again, She's a Karen for a reason. 2: "I know the Mayor, I know the Police. I'll have you fired!!" "Really? Well guess what Love, I know the Mayor and Police too. Along with the rest of the 1'693 Residents of this City. But they'll tell you all the same. Yo are not allowed to park in a NO Parking Zone".
OnyxWolf11 Our Old home phone had almost the same number as the Schucks Auto Motive store,one digit off at the last #.We got tons of calls, but we just Said sorry you have reached the wrong # ,this is a private residence ,they would apologize and that would be that . Even when they called back they never blamed us just said oops i did it again,didn't I sorry
That was funny ! (Pizza one) My son & I used to mess with scam calls like that until we'd get to laughing so hard to continue. (We're not young kids,I'm 68 & he's 42, We just have a good sense of humor)
My favorite one was told by a preacher comedian named Ken Davis. He said he got so upset at those calls, especially using "Hello, Ken?" as an opener that he litteraly cried. Catching the guy off guard, the telemarketer asked what's wrong to which Ken replied (still crying) "is this a joke?" Again, reassuring his call was not a joke, the guy asked what's wrong to which Ken said "Our house burned down two days ago..." Prompting the guy to appologize and hang up. Ken then, using this as a comedy bit, said "I wonder how long it took the guy to realize; if my house had burned down, how the heck am I talking to them on the phone?"
The redial joke happened to me. My number was almost identical to a local cargo company, just the last two digits were reversed. We often had to tell their customers they had the wrong number. On this day I explained to the gentleman and hung up. Two minutes later, another call. It was him again. So I explained again. After the fifth call I explained that he had to physically redial the number, not just keep hitting redial. He finally got the message.
The scary thing about this is, these people drive 4,000 pound cars at 80 MPH! Their mental condition is questionable, as is their response to anything unusual.
My number is one number off from a local tire shop. For 30 years, I've been getting these calls, but only once has anyone called 5 times in a row. I finally yelled at the guy, "PAY ATTENTION TO WHAT YOU ARE DIALING !!!"
I knew someone many years ago, who got one of those 1 digit off phone numbers. Of course it was a pizza parlor. After not getting though to people, he just"took" the order and hung up. Not sure how it got straighten out, but I do remember hearing about a pizza parlor with lousy delivery service.
I hope you get this, RedWheel: You are THE man for these reddit things. Your reading, tone of voice, inflections... all spot on. Your 'Hanks you kill it we grill it' voice did for me! Hot (very hot!) tea all down my chest! Worth every inch of burn. Still laughing.
I like you and MARKEE....You have THE best voice for it! MARKEE has a cool accent tho and reads them fairly well. Some one else I found, (won't call him out) "Says Hey lot of other ppl doing these off Redditt...so thought I would too"... (insert ANNOYING, high pitched geeky nerd voice HERE!) SSOOOOO ANNOYING.....we'll call him AC: for ANNOYING COPY CAT! NO idea HOW to really read them, punctuation, pausing, breaking into different parts etc.... Lasted long as I could, bout 2 minutes b4 my nerves said Enough! You have SPOILED me! Fireplace in background, nice masculine voice, who just HOW to read the post....how to put character, humor, life into your reading. WTG....KEEP IT UP!!! THANX!
I have a phone number that is one digit off from a local wine store. Around Christmas time i constantly get their calls. Finally sick of the wrong calls, i contacted the wine store and they basically told me to go to ....... Now i tell the wrong caller that I do Not have their wines in stock, and give them another stores number that actually does have what they want.
I’ve listened to a whole bunch of these now and have to say, Karen ordering pizza made me laugh fit yo split my sides. That really brightened my day. Only one number. Try three combinations of the same number. I grew up in a house where if the caller mixed up the middle two number, they got our house or a local working mans’ club. Or if they mixed up the last two numbers, they got our house or a local bank. This went on for nearly twenty years. Every other caller, either wanted a club or the bank. Most callers were ok and apologetic. But some would go on and on, about how they knew our house was either the club or the bank and why wouldn’t we just call Jack at the bar or Natalie in accounts? Some would even get a relative to call back and ask for the same person at the same location/department. And then get even angrier when we explained ‘again’ and gave them the correct number... again. To which the standard reply from the caller in error, was to go off on one and still be yelling as we ended the call.
When I was a kid, our phone number was close to that of the local movie theater, like 6022 instead of 2260. More than once, I remember my father picking up the phone, saying "Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs" and hanging up.
Hah...my old landline had a 4 instead of a 1 but was otherwise identical for the local vet. My vet , I may add. I'd just redirect to the correct number and laugh with the vet about the misdials. Although a few occasions, it was after hours and quite urgent. I'd then give the emergency vet number or some practical advice ( I nurse humans) people were quite polite about it. Guess aussies are little more laid back.
Lol, I don't know why the Karen in story Two thinks using swear words right out of the gate, right in front of TWO Police Officers, is going to do anything positive! If anything, that's just going to put them even further on edge!
my phone number used to be simular to the local sheriff's department. not a number off but close enough. lets say my first 3 digits (after area code) was 212 theres was 121. Id get phone calls often looking for them. Luckily never got a karen
I used to live in Jacksonville, FL. The last digit of my phone number was one number off from the local Pizza Hut. As in this story, The F****ery was real!
Thank you for reading that very good story about the wrong-number-to-the-pizza-place. I am amused by all the IDWHL stories, but that one made me laugh of loud.
2 years after i moved into my current place and got a new number this 1 guy would call once a month for this 1 woman .... first 3 times i explained NICELY that this woman doesnt live at this number . he called for 8 yrs even after threats of police . last time i got cable tv they tacked on digital phone ( didint ask for it ) 4 days after cable tv was installed im watching tv and a banner popped up on my screen with Incoming call ... went on for like 2 months .. till i canceld everything except internet .... I love messing with spammers ..... id answer with " HI Welcome to city Morgue , you wreck em we stack em whats your flavor : fried, crispy or charcoaled .... or hi fisherman's worf the special of the day ...... click
When I got those types of calls and the same number shows up on my caller ID, I would answer...Mabel's Whorehouse, the customer always cums first...no more calls after that...
I had a Phone number in Uxbridge England with the area code one digit different from a Maternity hospital, You can imagine some of the conversations I had. Eventually Brit Tel Com gave me a new number and made my old number auto dial on Maternity.
Growing up my friends number was close to the local Sears store. I don't recall if I transposed numbers or what, but every once in a while I'd call Sears. Then there was Becky. Some boy would call for Becky. At one point I asked what Becky's full name was and was able to get he actual phone number (this was in the 80s - we still had phone books). After several years the calls stopped. I assume Becky went off to college. I wonder if she and her caller were just friends of bf/gf. Did they get married? It was never a real annoyance. He call, I'd answer and give him Becky's phone number.
Walking past a payphone it started ringing so I picked it up saying "who are you and how did you get this number. This number is unlisted and is for undercover cia operatives please stay on the line until my colleagues arrive at your address"
I actually have one of these that's the reverse. A friend answered a call one evening (bit of a jerk) Friend: City Morgue,you stab'em we slab'em.. Lady: uhm sorry wrong number Click! 2 minutes later phone rings & Friend answers again. Friend: Hello? Lady: Uhm,this isn't the Morgue is it? Friend: laughs and explains lady says she was calling for a pizza place and actually did have the wrong number.. had some laughs then she calls the right number..very funny all in all.
A bit of advice...when you bundle cable, internet, and phone service DO NOT assume you are the first person to have that number...and one digit off is a bitch.....
I got the wrong number scenario quite often at a firm I work for. The calls that got through wrong are the ones aimed at getting to another firm, which has a single digit difference in phone number. My firm has a 3 and the other has a 2. I thought that's the problem with tapping the number too fast up until I found out from one of the calls that the details shown on Internet Explorer got the wrong number as opposed to Mozilla Firefox. Don't know who's the genius that submitted the details and I just pushed that aside as I don't know what else I should be doing for that situation anyway.
Got calls like that into the unpublished line in the neonatal ICU where I was charge nurse. Turns out, a new pizza place had sent out flyers & transposed 2 numbers. The unit secretary finally had gotten so stressed with the phone calls that it was turfed to me. I apologized for the inconvenience, threw in drinks & garlic bread for free & promised better service in the future. They never called back!😳
My parents had the same phone number for over 50 years. It was one number different than the Welfare office. We would answer, "Hello," and more than one caller said, "Where's my check?"
The "pizza" guy should have called her back a few days later and said, "Madame Duboise's House of Pleasure? I'd like to have a tall redheaded young lady, big green eyes, large juicy bosoms, firmly rounded derriere and well educated in the "arts." And if she has a friend, I wouldn't mind a menage a trois. In fact, I'd gladly pay double."
When I was in the Navy stationed aboard the USS Enterprise, we had one guy who'd always answer the phone: "Forward torpedo room!"
(Aircraft carriers don't have torpedo rooms).
Lol, that's great!
Beam me up Scotty!!!
I once worked with a lady whose surname was 'Mee'. She always answered the phone "Mee here".
1: To think that all it takes is one wrong input number to mess up someone's day. My mam got a call from someone, asking if this is was "so and so Restaurant" which she explained that they got the wrong number but fortunately for her the caller had common sense and actually apologised for the mess up before hanging up. You'd think after the first mess up and the person saying that they were not Dominoes that this Karen would get the hint and stop calling. But then again, She's a Karen for a reason.
2: "I know the Mayor, I know the Police. I'll have you fired!!"
"Really? Well guess what Love, I know the Mayor and Police too. Along with the rest of the 1'693 Residents of this City. But they'll tell you all the same. Yo are not allowed to park in a NO Parking Zone".
OnyxWolf11
Our Old home phone had almost the same number as the Schucks Auto Motive store,one digit off at the last #.We got tons of calls,
but we just Said sorry you have reached the wrong # ,this is a private residence ,they would apologize and that would be that .
Even when they called back they never blamed us just said oops i did it again,didn't I sorry
OynxWolf11 i
I used that “ you kill it, we grill it,” line before. This first one is one of my favorite stories.
Imo best Reddit story so far
If I don't know the number I always say, "Marion County sheriff's office. How may I direct your call?" Never had one person answer.
Ditto, though I feel for the staff Karen hassled at the pizza place.
That was funny ! (Pizza one)
My son & I used to mess with scam calls like that until we'd get to laughing so hard to continue.
(We're not young kids,I'm 68 & he's 42,
We just have a good sense of humor)
My favorite one was told by a preacher comedian named Ken Davis.
He said he got so upset at those calls, especially using "Hello, Ken?" as an opener that he litteraly cried.
Catching the guy off guard, the telemarketer asked what's wrong to which Ken replied (still crying) "is this a joke?"
Again, reassuring his call was not a joke, the guy asked what's wrong to which Ken said "Our house burned down two days ago..." Prompting the guy to appologize and hang up.
Ken then, using this as a comedy bit, said "I wonder how long it took the guy to realize; if my house had burned down, how the heck am I talking to them on the phone?"
If I were the first OP I would've just taken her order, "rung it up," and then unplugged my phone.
The redial joke happened to me. My number was almost identical to a local cargo company, just the last two digits were reversed. We often had to tell their customers they had the wrong number. On this day I explained to the gentleman and hung up. Two minutes later, another call. It was him again. So I explained again. After the fifth call I explained that he had to physically redial the number, not just keep hitting redial. He finally got the message.
The scary thing about this is, these people drive 4,000 pound cars at 80 MPH! Their mental condition is questionable, as is their response to anything unusual.
lol people are so stupid
My number is one number off from a local tire shop. For 30 years, I've been getting these calls, but only once has anyone called 5 times in a row. I finally yelled at the guy, "PAY ATTENTION TO WHAT YOU ARE DIALING !!!"
I knew someone many years ago, who got one of those 1 digit off phone numbers. Of course it was a pizza parlor. After not getting though to people, he just"took" the order and hung up. Not sure how it got straighten out, but I do remember hearing about a pizza parlor with lousy delivery service.
I hope you get this, RedWheel: You are THE man for these reddit things. Your reading, tone of voice, inflections... all spot on. Your 'Hanks you kill it we grill it' voice did for me! Hot (very hot!) tea all down my chest! Worth every inch of burn. Still laughing.
OOHHH YEAH, THAT was GOOD! I LOVED the guy's thinkin' on that one!!
And the instant Karma on the fence one....
I like you and MARKEE....You have THE best voice for it! MARKEE has a cool accent tho and reads them fairly well.
Some one else I found, (won't call him out) "Says Hey lot of other ppl doing these off Redditt...so thought I would too"...
(insert ANNOYING, high pitched geeky nerd voice HERE!) SSOOOOO ANNOYING.....we'll call him AC: for ANNOYING COPY CAT! NO idea HOW to really read them, punctuation, pausing, breaking into different parts etc....
Lasted long as I could, bout 2 minutes b4 my nerves said Enough!
You have SPOILED me! Fireplace in background, nice masculine voice, who just HOW to read the post....how to put character, humor, life into your reading. WTG....KEEP IT UP!!! THANX!
I have a phone number that is one digit off from a local wine store. Around Christmas time i constantly get their calls. Finally sick of the wrong calls, i contacted the wine store and they basically told me to go to ....... Now i tell the wrong caller that I do Not have their wines in stock, and give them another stores number that actually does have what they want.
hi 👋 hope everyone has a good day (including RedWheel)
I'll try, but i work at Walmart.
I did.Hope yours was a good day to cookie monster.
I can't, you ate all my cookies man.. :'(
Don't mess with my cookies. I only get em on holidays. Gotta love moms homemade chocolate chip
Your spread of anti-Karen vaccine might not be liked in some "natural" communities :)
I’ve listened to a whole bunch of these now and have to say, Karen ordering pizza made me laugh fit yo split my sides. That really brightened my day.
Only one number. Try three combinations of the same number. I grew up in a house where if the caller mixed up the middle two number, they got our house or a local working mans’ club. Or if they mixed up the last two numbers, they got our house or a local bank. This went on for nearly twenty years. Every other caller, either wanted a club or the bank.
Most callers were ok and apologetic. But some would go on and on, about how they knew our house was either the club or the bank and why wouldn’t we just call Jack at the bar or Natalie in accounts? Some would even get a relative to call back and ask for the same person at the same location/department. And then get even angrier when we explained ‘again’ and gave them the correct number... again. To which the standard reply from the caller in error, was to go off on one and still be yelling as we ended the call.
The first story is my all time favorite!
When I was a kid, our phone number was close to that of the local movie theater, like 6022 instead of 2260.
More than once, I remember my father picking up the phone, saying "Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs" and hanging up.
Hah...my old landline had a 4 instead of a 1 but was otherwise identical for the local vet. My vet , I may add. I'd just redirect to the correct number and laugh with the vet about the misdials. Although a few occasions, it was after hours and quite urgent. I'd then give the emergency vet number or some practical advice ( I nurse humans) people were quite polite about it. Guess aussies are little more laid back.
I guess the lady didn't know the mayor after all!!!
They both got to be one of the best.
Im from the uk and love hearing them.
First Story: no dude, your first mistake was actually plugging the phone in.
Lol, I don't know why the Karen in story Two thinks using swear words right out of the gate, right in front of TWO Police Officers, is going to do anything positive! If anything, that's just going to put them even further on edge!
I like the fireplace background! NICE
my phone number used to be simular to the local sheriff's department. not a number off but close enough. lets say my first 3 digits (after area code) was 212 theres was 121. Id get phone calls often looking for them. Luckily never got a karen
I used to live in Jacksonville, FL. The last digit of my phone number was one number off from the local Pizza Hut. As in this story, The F****ery was real!
😜😆 Story 1 - don't ever mess with Military personnel...... hilarious.
Story 2 - she was driving a Porsche "boxed-in" rofl. Good stories 👍👍
Thank you for reading that very good story about the wrong-number-to-the-pizza-place. I am amused by all the IDWHL stories, but that one made me laugh of loud.
2 years after i moved into my current place and got a new number this 1 guy would call once a month for this 1 woman .... first 3 times i explained NICELY that this woman doesnt live at this number . he called for 8 yrs even after threats of police . last time i got cable tv they tacked on digital phone ( didint ask for it ) 4 days after cable tv was installed im watching tv and a banner popped up on my screen with Incoming call ... went on for like 2 months .. till i canceld everything except internet .... I love messing with spammers ..... id answer with " HI Welcome to city Morgue , you wreck em we stack em whats your flavor : fried, crispy or charcoaled .... or hi fisherman's worf the special of the day ...... click
I want to know, "Are you sure you're NOT Domino?"
When I got those types of calls and the same number shows up on my caller ID, I would answer...Mabel's Whorehouse, the customer always cums first...no more calls after that...
I had a Phone number in Uxbridge England with the area code one digit different from a Maternity hospital, You can imagine some of the conversations I had. Eventually Brit Tel Com gave me a new number and made my old number auto dial on Maternity.
Growing up my friends number was close to the local Sears store. I don't recall if I transposed numbers or what, but every once in a while I'd call Sears. Then there was Becky. Some boy would call for Becky. At one point I asked what Becky's full name was and was able to get he actual phone number (this was in the 80s - we still had phone books). After several years the calls stopped. I assume Becky went off to college. I wonder if she and her caller were just friends of bf/gf. Did they get married? It was never a real annoyance. He call, I'd answer and give him Becky's phone number.
OMG! That pizza call was epic! 😂🤣😂🤣
Another set of stories, another set of smiles 😁😀
She's lucky that she didn't get another ticket.
Back in the early 70's my home phone was one digit off a Domino's also, but we only got a few wrong numbers.
That Domino's Pizza story is the funniest story I've ever heard. 😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
These dumb people wouls.stress me.out so much but I love the outcomes to their horrible behavior.
Restores my faith in humanity.
Love listening to your stories and hearing about the karma these people bring onto themselves.
Walking past a payphone it started ringing so I picked it up saying "who are you and how did you get this number. This number is unlisted and is for undercover cia operatives please stay on the line until my colleagues arrive at your address"
Hi Red Wheel , I really like it how you tell the story’s ! You have a pleasant voice , thank you !
I loved the "Redial" joke, sadly it is one of those jokes that won't make sense to people who have never used a landline phone.
You know cell phones have redial
I actually have one of these that's the reverse. A friend answered a call one evening (bit of a jerk)
Friend: City Morgue,you stab'em we slab'em..
Lady: uhm sorry wrong number Click!
2 minutes later phone rings & Friend answers again.
Friend: Hello?
Lady: Uhm,this isn't the Morgue is it?
Friend: laughs and explains lady says she was calling for a pizza place and actually did have the wrong number.. had some laughs then she calls the right number..very funny all in all.
Mark MacDonald ...... LOL....DearHusband would answer the landline like that.
A high school buddy of mine answered his parents phone with that city morgue line. I borrowed it from him.
A bit of advice...when you bundle cable, internet, and phone service DO NOT assume you are the first person to have that number...and one digit off is a bitch.....
🥲Hank's Roadkill Cafe...brilliant!
Karens evaporate their brain cells with their tantrums/ aggressions.
1st one sounds like back when comcast first came out with its package deal to lock you in glad that lawsuit put a stop that crap
I want to order two large roadkill pepperoni pizzas.
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Roadkill cafe... brilliant! :)
Good job solder
Only 26 minutes old? Sweet.
I got the wrong number scenario quite often at a firm I work for. The calls that got through wrong are the ones aimed at getting to another firm, which has a single digit difference in phone number. My firm has a 3 and the other has a 2. I thought that's the problem with tapping the number too fast up until I found out from one of the calls that the details shown on Internet Explorer got the wrong number as opposed to Mozilla Firefox. Don't know who's the genius that submitted the details and I just pushed that aside as I don't know what else I should be doing for that situation anyway.
Ours was the cinema's number last two digits reversed
No one causes Karen more trouble than Karen.
Story # 1 LOL
Oh crap 🤣
👏👏
My honey has a few stories, but he and I don't know how to get them to you. How do we do this?
Ha ha
Got calls like that into the unpublished line in the neonatal ICU where I was charge nurse. Turns out, a new pizza place had sent out flyers & transposed 2 numbers. The unit secretary finally had gotten so stressed with the phone calls that it was turfed to me. I apologized for the inconvenience, threw in drinks & garlic bread for free & promised better service in the future. They never called back!😳
When you do the voice of the guy who got calls for Dominoes you sound like Kermit The Frog.
JP's side job
My parents had the same phone number for over 50 years. It was one number different than the Welfare office. We would answer, "Hello," and more than one caller said, "Where's my check?"
Did your parents tell them: "Did you look in your mailbox"?
45
I prefer Pizza Hut.
The "pizza" guy should have called her back a few days later and said, "Madame Duboise's House of Pleasure? I'd like to have a tall redheaded young lady, big green eyes, large juicy bosoms, firmly rounded derriere and well educated in the "arts." And if she has a friend, I wouldn't mind a menage a trois. In fact, I'd gladly pay double."
Again: old stories.
And another horrible cookie cutter story.
Engagement points!
My favourite fake business intro is:
"Hay, this is Don's Pizza slash Abortions! Your loss is our sauce!"