The worst moment of the day - waking up in the morning - the first moment of consciousness - and this knot in the pit of your stomach, and wishing you could sleep forever…
I feel you. I agree, for me the most difficult moment is the early morning. Even you wake up earlier than normally, your body wakes you up in alert just to feel that... It gets better when you get up and start doing things.. Lately there are times where I feel more understood from ppl on RUclips than people around me...
Hey I’ve been there, I’m there again, I’d say if you live with someone, family etc, ask them to show up at your door at the time you wake up, so that right when you’re about to get up and deal with 2000 things in your mind, you see someone who talks about something else with you, this really helped me?
Just broken up (again) with the same man. I know it can't work. I've given everything I had. I am going to make my own 'happy' from now on. Will save my love for someone who wants to and has capacity to reflect it back to me. But now, I'm very very sad. Miss my man but know deep down this is right. It's hard to walk away from someone you love, but I have to love myself more.
Nice Video. My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love him so much I can't stop thinking about him, l've tried my very best to get him back in my life, but to no avail, I'm frustrated, I don't see my life as anyone else. I've done my best to get rid of the thoughts of him, but I can't, I don't know why I'm saying this here, I really miss him and just can't stop thinking about him.
I have been in such a situation. My relationship ended about two years ago, but I could not let him go, so I had to do all I could to get him back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual adviser who helped me bring him back, now we are back together, and I must say I am enjoying every moment...
Been three months since my ex and I broke up. The pain has gone down, but every once in a while I get strong waves of sadness. Keep working on yourselves and don’t seek others. Trust I got desperate and even tried going out and it just made things worse. Build yourself up and be kind to yourself as well.
@@lv4230 It’s not easy bro. The thought of her still crosses my head. You have to focus on things that bring you happiness. Go workout, eat healthy, and hangout with friends/family. Also, don’t watch porn and jack off. Try to go on semen retention for a while (trust me on this one) Get rid of anything that reminds you of your ex. Good luck bro!
Same here...2 months of pain on & off...then 1/2 month it was ok finally!! Then I contacted him 2 days ago....he is not interested...and the pain is back :( Hope it will end sooner this time...it's exhausting
Yes. Absolutely. Gave no real closure. And no time for us to discuss what is best for both of us. He was my best friend before dating. Nothing hurts more than having them want you to leaving you knowing that they are in pain not being with you, but knows it’s what’s best for right now.
The pain won't last it will pass,don't hang on to that one person step aside and move forward, ,watch motivational videos,meditate,ground yourself,do yoga,make a list of what your grateful for (very powerful) go out with friends make yourself busy don't put your life on hold because that person you thought won't ever leave you has moved on without a thought, and remember when one door closes another opens,trust the process.
One I read this it's really helpful but I feel this one door that closes and the other opening is going in favor of my ex and not me. I feel she's my everything and I lost and she will find someone more better than me and I can't find anyone like her again 😞😞💔💔💔
@@jesussaves4485 I feel the same way my ex i moved with to Fl got a new good job got tempted by more successful men and cheated. Now she has a good job and is with a new guy she had already found. Its been 2 months and it still hurts but i try to think of small positives i opened up a lot with my parents when i was hurt and reconnected with them and grew our relationship and also my brother i haven’t talked to in 4 years we reconnected nd now i have my brother back. Sometimes the doors that open may not be a partner but maybe other relationships, job, or even Peace within. Just try to hold it together nd not panic when the sad waves hit, it’ll pass and just take it one day at a time hope you find your peace and happiness again 🙏
Worse part of my life after my 5yrs relationship broke up, when you wake up in the morning, no text or call from someone you love, and knowing his not there forever i wanna plough my own grave😭😭😭
It’s a painful experience but it’s time to re love yourself, put the things together, get going, what I learned from those heartbroken breakups, is those 3 words - life goes on, make a peace with the emotions and don’t try to hide or run away, face it and deal with it
@@summerhall1371 if you love someone set them free, if they'll love you they'll comeback..it hurts but if this is the best for the both of us let them swim.
Happened to me a couple months ago. I then let him back in my life. It brought temporary comfort, but it won’t last. Just prolonging the pain. Wishing everyone in these situations the strength to move on. 💚
@Irina Ira tried again, gave a 2nd chance and i guess the person was never serious. Their mind changed 180 degree and texted you break up messages instead of a call. I deserve a call at least. Just a coward and a jerk.
Hey Tiffany! How are you doing now? I just went through a similar situation and I need to move on from him. I also tried so hard to guard my heart and not let my guard down, but I still got hurt when he left saying he was too busy with work and cannot offer me any thing more than a hookup. He said he wanted a relationship with me and I believed in that. Hope you are doing better now.
Please be kind to yourself. You tried to protect yourself but things went wrong. We don't have control over the course of events. Be compassionate to yourself and try to do whatever is possible in this situation including analysing the situation. You are not alone dear friend. ❤️❤️
@@3Sisters.23 same sis. I am going through so much pain rn. It was a 4 year old long relationship. Where he was the one telling me to put my guards down. He even told me we'll get married in a year. But he broke up with me on text 19 days ago.
@@mxhek1604 hey! I am so sorry this happened to you. I would urge you to take solace in the fact that he broke your heart before you two were married. I know the pain hits you like a wave and is unbearable, but you can try to think of it this way - one should try to marry somebody who has the courage to keep things going strong, and the one who breaks up is not that person.
im 2 months into the break up after 6 years and a half relationship. everytime when things feel a lil better, the pain comes back 10x harder. its like an everyday nightmare
@@jellybelly100100 yeah, it gets better. slow but yeah. better than nothing. next month will be 1 year and all i can say is that i dont miss her anymore but the triggers are still there
It has been 4 1/2 years for me. Time did not heal me. I still cry everyday. The panic is gone. But the debilitating grief is constant. I've accepted the pain of losing the relationship I always dreamt of having in this life. I've had to accept the pain and the reality of crippling loneliness. Acceptance is the only thing time has given me.
Feelings changes. Go through your tantrums. Analyze your relationship. Take the lessons out of this. Find new hobby's. Keeps your thoughts in a journal. Meditate. Be grateful for this and move on.
Theres something so darn relatable about Matt, his tone is so comforting and reassuring. Experience is the greatest teacher . Thanks for your years of service to us Matt.
It's been a year. Even if I still have love for this half ass man. My worth meant more to me than someone who never appreciated what I brought to the table.
Since 2015, Matthew you have helped me with break ups and my own self worth. I’m going through a new break up of a 2yr relationship, it’s been 3 weeks. My perception on pain due to a lot of your help over the years has made me go through this without devastation and it’s more peaceful. My control over heartbreak pain. I’m truly blessed. Thank you always.
Time does help, but today rejection hurts almost physically. I need to be strong to not send a text, and am waiting hopefully for a day I won't care as much. Your videos help much, Matthew. Thank you.
I am going through this pain now.. Wanna move on.. I don't know how🙂.. But im not gonna chase that person who doesn't even care about me .. I ll get over
Everything changes and the right relationship isn’t brittle… these ideas of Matthew helped me make it! The new one to change our relationship with pain. Thank you Mat!
"The right relationship isn't brittle", changed my life. I'm 6 months post break-up. My relationship spontaneously combusted in about 20 seconds. Knowing this truth got me through it.
Healing really goes beyond helping oneself sometimes the wrong person just leaves a scar to be healed by the right one . I really love your selection of words even in pain can I send you a dm pls
Still getting through a breakup that happened last week. Thank you, Matthew for all of your videos. Definitely has helped me work through the pain bit by bit.
@@AT-zb5in that makes me very happy to hear for you and it also gives me hope for me. I know the process can be different for all but hearing things like this does help I wish you happiness and peace on your journeys to come
@@lv4230 Thank you! And I wish you the same as well. Honestly, you will get there. Time is the biggest thing that helped me, while also taking into accountability of the role I played in allowing my ex to do that to me. You got this! I believe in you!
@@kingdomofanimosity2684 Hi Amal. I am doing much better! I didn't think it would be possible when it was so early after the breakup. I would think of sad thoughts wonder why it didn't work but little by little I started positive self talk. I would say it's ok he has a right to be with someone who is a better match for him and i deserve that too. I also started hearing positive podcast positive meditation and when i would get anxious i would listen to descriptive meditation walking reading and venting to my sister. You'll be better just work through the emotions and you'll see little by little you will accept it. Accepting it even if we don't like it is much better and healthier than beating a dead horse and forcing ourselves onto others. That's what I finally accepted. Best of luck . Your social platform friends are here to cheer you on.
Been with this beautiful woman for 16 months & we lived together. I feel like the relationship flashed before my eyes it's crazy. At times I wish this was all a dream & I can wake up from this reality & have everything back to how it was with her by my side smiling & laughing. RUclips videos keep me from getting so much anxiety & I can't be in my house all alone because then all the thoughts & memories come. I feel like the best part of my day is going to sleep at night & when I wake up in the morning the pain starts over. Can't wait for this feeling to go away
I've had chronic physical pain for 8 years. 4 surgeries were performed and none of it helped. The pain and also feeling kinda hopeless changed me and changed my relationship. I never gave up. Showing up at multiple doctors and agreeing on a 5th surgery. 3 weeks after this 5th surgery my former bf of 8-9 years broke up with me and immidiately replaced me. Yes, i have been through hell. Not knowing if my body will ever work properly again, loosing the person I thought was the love of my life, had to quit my job and move in at my parent's tiny flat at age 34. My friends and family saved me from the worst. Fast forward one year: The surgery helped, I can finally enjoy life again. I found a really nice flat, also a new job. I know my true friends and am thankful every day. I do have a love life again. Matthew, if you are reading this (I really hope you do): Your videos have helped me a lot dealing with heartache, getting over my ex and working on my self worth. Thank you so much for your work 💛 Wish you all the best!
Great Content! If you’re going through a breakup… Personal Development is one of the best things you can do for yourself - because, we as human beings, we’re supposed to embrace growth! So make sure you find your Purpose in life - whatever it might be, and work on it daily, and continue to make progress, because progress is - really the key to happiness. But don’t do it for any girl or guy, make sure you’re doing it for yourself - and just be happy! Anyway, that’s my two cents. -Carlos Verde - Dating Tips
Remember to love yourself 1000x more for what they put you through. My X of 7 yrs destroyed & betrayed me. My mind forgives & ready to move on but my heart is injured trem due to his cruelty in the end. Why can't we end it like 2 decent human beings? Living is not easy esp on days I have to get up & go to work. I do love myself so much more for my poor heart & body. I do a lot of hot yoga & mediation. They do help! If u r like me, I give you hug. I feel u
He broke up with me 6 months ago…. I’m about to have his daughter 😭 it’s been SO difficult because I feel like I’m on a Teeter Totter of emotions. Excited and happy I’m finally going to be a mom but extremely sad her father left and never cared about me or this baby. I’ve been doing serious work on myself to heal, haven’t dated or been with any men since he left, focusing on my health and doing my best to enjoy this pregnancy… all I want to do is hold my daughter. She’s my reward. She’s my joy. She needs momma to bring her all the love and support so, with faith, I am healing for her and for me and leaving him behind so that the right man can show up and love us 🥰
I hear you girl, in a similar boat right now! He just left me in my pregnancy and didn't care about me or our child to be. Instead spewed alot of hate. Learning to rise above it and not internalize it...can't believe I survived an emotionally and physically abusive relationship
It’s been 2 weeks & 3 days since the love of my life of 7 years ended our journey together. The hardest thing is it came out of the blue & the reason is something I can’t do a damn thing about…. There was a 15yr age gap, I was the older woman and he just said he can’t see himself retiring happy with me as I’ll be too old. He’s 35. I totally thought he was my future. We had a distance relationship mostly because he’s in the military but we coped really well with that & during the first lockdown he moved in with me. And ironically we grew closer & stronger during those 6 months.. so much so that we started looking at houses & even put an offer on one. I’m not your typical 50yr old, I’ve never been married, I couldn’t have children & I have a friendship group of mainly 30+ yr olds as I’m more like them. I really believed in the happy ending. We were best friends. We travelled the world over 7 years, laughed like drains, had so much fun. He was the male equivalent of me & on the day he left I told him he was the best thing to happen to me. And now I’m in darkness. I’ve had no contact with him for 2 weeks, the longest I’ve gone with no contact when he was in this country & I’m not afraid to admit I’m struggling. My whole future has changed in the blink of an eye & I feel like I’ve lost half of me. It’s painful to just breathe each day right now.💔
it's been two weeks since our breakup and no contact and im the older woman too. I'm 24 and he is 19, we too share a lot of things in common and the trust and understanding we have for each other. However, he ended things because he thinks that he is not ready for a romantic relationship. I hope we can both give each other a hug, everyday I can feel my heart breaking even though I told myself countless times that I support his decision and I try my best to look at the brighter side of things even though im hurting inside
This will pass! Everything on earth will passway only God's word stays the same! I broke up with my boyfriend of six months 3 weeks no contact. He has been on my mind I just reminded my self I broke up with that helps.
I’m in a similar situation. Together for 6 years. We had a 12 year age gap. I’m the older woman. He broke up with me 2 weeks ago because he wants to have his freedom. He wants to see other people and wants a life without me. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I understand how you are feeling. Just know it will get better, take it day by day and take care of yourself. Sending love to everyone who’s going through a heartache right now. ❤️
7 weeks on from my break up & 2 weeks ago I found out through social media that my ex had already found someone else before he broke up with me. So the age thing, everything he said was all lies. 3 times I asked if there was someone else & he was adamant there wasn’t. My heart broke all over again. The pain has been dreadful but my family have been amazing & I owe it to them to keep fighting to realise my worth. One day I hope I will
that's funny. My X ended out 7 yrs relationship abruptly. He married 2x. 2nd Mar lasted 7 yrs. Mine, his 3rd relationship he ended on our 7 yrs Anniv. See the pattern? I'm beyond broken & heart. I will try to remember his pattern. We don't deserve this at all, all deep love & faith put into. He said he's looking for the love of his life? Thanks for f** 7 yrs of my life. I fell in love with the wrong human being
I saw an old video of yours Mathew about toxic men, 7 years back, can't imagine how time flew. When I saw the topic of this video, it only made me smile. I smiled because I thought how it's going to benefit people the way it benefitted me when I was broken. We may never meet but I want to let you know you are a very big part of my healing process and I thank you very much for that.
Indeed. Beginning a long process of introspection and reflection tend to yield many breakthroughs and give us the opportunity to understand ourselves better, and what our gifts, strengths, talents, weaknesses and pitfalls are. Pain itself is inevitable, so we shouldn't be afraid of being hurt - we just have to find out who's worth suffering for.
I've been hurt once thats it. If you believe everything happens for a reason both good and bad then any break up is a God send. We all learn the hard way unfortunately so just know as much as you love someone if there not ment to be with you then your ment for someone else. I've been single for 2yrs now.
Thank you for this comment. I am going through a time of healing from a break up. It happened in Marche 2020. After almost 2 and a half year I feel relatively okay. My ex- wife still appreciated me for who I am. She left me although for the fact that we did not feel any attraction in an intimacy wat let alone sexually. It was completely understandable that the left me toe another man who could give her what she was missing out. I wanted her to go and start a new life. It was hard to loose my companion but it was for a reason. We still have some contact but things change. Het new boyfriend felt guilty about what happened and I could get along with hij for two years. Nog he is having more and more problems with me still having contact with both of them. I think I have to go through a second ' break up ' to make things work for myself. I don't want to loose my selfrespect and the only thing I want is just to go on with my own personal life. My ex wife feels sorry for me for what id happening now. I want to stop the contact with both of them because it brings me down again. I really like your comment in which you said that perhaps somebody else appreciated it to be with me ons day. Thank you so much for listing your comment. I know Matthew is there for the ladies but I can relatie to a lot of things that people are posting. By the way, I am 69 years old and was married for more then 25 years. I still have to find my way but I will succeed, at least that is what I think😅. Wish you all the best from Portugal. I am Dutch myself.
@@g.j.schreuder7152 you sound very kind. Yeah everything happens for a reason like I said. And I held on to both the baby daddy who I was with for 15yrs and my ex I was engaged to for 8 months. It's all divine timing. My advice to you is think of you. Is it fair to you to waste your love on someone who doesn't want it? No being the answer. You was ment for someone else not her.
@@phoenixxx6427 Thank you for your reaction. It is a straight answer and I know I have to follow your advice. It is the only way to let go and put myself in first place. I think you did that already. It sounds very okay to hear from you, who is more or less unknown to me, that you are very to the point in your answer. Thanks for your information for what I should have done already more then a year ago. I wish you lots of wisdom to find your own way in your personal, private life. Gerard.
I got engaged, lived with the person I thought I was going to spend forever with and he woke up yesterday deciding he wants to do whatever he wants and live his life alone… most definitely feeling like I’m going through it
Last September my ex cheated on me and instead of trying to say sorry cos I probably would of taken him back he just went and we had been together for 3 years and was trying for a baby I was so hurt and cried I didn’t eat I was a mess for about 3 months. Matthew is right the pain changes it’s now April and don’t get me wrong it’s not easy but I am eating I don’t cry everyday and it’s changed I realise now I wasn’t meant to be with him. Something better out there for me and anyone who reads this I hope you know there is something better for you 💗 I immersed myself in Matthew videos 💕 it helps I literally listened to Matthew all day and night over and over and over again until some words sunk in if he should of he would of but he didn’t cos he didn’t want to and sometimes giving yourself a pep talk can help too. Sending love to anyone going through pain I promise it gets easier xxx
Great advice Matthew. Strong words. From experience, and I wish I knew this after my previous breakups... is you have to learn that feeling pain is all part of being alive, as is feeling love. You have to know that no matter what happened and how painful it is today, get up and believe that you will be ok, you will learn from the experience, you will make better choices next time, you will be a stronger you... in time. Be confident in your own strength and grow from it. The next time it happens, you'll be able to cope with the pain in a better way.
I’m think I’m about to walk away from someone I love so dearly. It hurts because I don’t want to, but deep down I know I have to. He has expressed multiple times he is unsure about us, he is hot and cold, and my mental health is taking a toll from the confusion he has. I need to get ready for this breakup 💔
Hopefully you read this. Talk to him about it and tell him how you're feeling. Read your comment to him if you have to. He obviously has his reasons for his behaviour, and your goal should be to get him to explain it so you understand. Don't throw the relationship away just because you're confused. Use the opportunity to have the conversation now and potentially save the situation while you still can. Once you end the relationship, you cant have this conversation and you'll perhaps look back in future and wish you had.
Get out before you dig yourself in more! If they told you that nothing will change. if you keep staying he will get another woman and he will make you regret the day you were born. I know it can be so hard but you can do it! You deserve better have selflove 🙏
How are you doing now? I'm in the same situation right now. I should have broken up with him but I didn't. And he broke up with me first and now I'm going through hell. It's been 3 days and I cannot wait for this week/month to be over and feel better already.
I must be one of a few that just can't control my ego 😭 it's been 3 years since we split and my heart is still broken. I cry nearly everyday cos I know I was the reason why we broke up. It hurts so much! I love him so much!
I am too but what hurts is it’s not a problem that can’t be fixed. No one was physical or no one cheated anything to that level. The problem just needed my attention and for me to fix it but he still doesn’t believe That I will change. I don’t think the reason is worth ending a 5 year relationship over. But that’s up to him and all I can do now is wait till he decides if we stay or split for good
@@queenrashell I'm in the same situation I broke up with him because he was not calling me enough! Last time I called him he said he will call me back but took him two days to call. That made feel I was not important to him anymore. small things add up led me to break up with him!I just was so confused about our relationship 😔 I have talked to him about this issues I feel like he didn't care if I stay or go😫
I had been there done that … just what you went through nowdays when I went something difficult being rejection in relationship, work issues etc etc I won’t panic or breakdown badly instead deal it the current issues, and moving forward…. Its called keep continue living !
I just went through breakup hell, but y'know it's true what the experts say: after 11 weeks I'm ok again. You really can make it to the other side. But the most important thing that I believe really helped is that I was sober for many months from drugs & alcohol prior to the breakup. I'm really glad I didn't go back to substance abuse to deal with it, and I'm thankful I didn't TRY to get sober during it! Sobriety provided the focus I needed to look for answers and that's how I discovered Matthew Hussey. Thanks Matt for helping me to sort out my pain & confusion!
Anyone watching this is definitely going through a tough break up or divorce and seeking ways to successfully get through it. This is a great video and it's always good to hear people give the right advice and suggestions on how to deal with troubles like this. I just got out of a relationship that was almost for 4 years. We were both very much in love, we had planned a future, everything seemed a okay, and it seemed like it was a good healthy relationship. What could have gone wrong? Well what went wrong is that towards the end, she revealed to me that she cheated on me and that she was seeking attention from people who would give her the attention she wanted. It turned out that she didn't know what she wanted, who she wanted, and didn't really take the relationship seriously. Definitely opposite of what I had thought. I can never trust her again. In my eyes, she'll always be a liar and a cheater, which is why moving on from her was the best choice. I'm not going to waste my time with someone who doesn't know what they want. I love who I am and I'll always be me no matter what. Now as far as why she cheated, it's because she didn't like my looks, which I love, she didn't like my personality, which I love, and she didn't like my hobbies, which I love. She feels that anybody who isn't the hardcore overly macho borderline violent hyper-masculine bad boy is too soft. I'm not that but I'm not a soft person who's a doormat either. I'm a regular strong confident gentleman, but even that was too soft for her. She didn't like that I collected comic books and action figures and superhero t-shirts. I never put those above her or our relationship, but she just didn't like that I was into that in general. So instead of telling me what she liked and disliked in the beginning, she wasted my time which is the biggest offense of all. So that's my story. I'm not a victim and nobody is, but I'm still as always being my authentic self and getting through it. Save my strength and energy for someone who's serious about relationships.
@@amylamb2768 thank you for the comment. I'm really happy my story helped you. I wish you the best of luck with what you're dealing with. It is a very tough situation. Especially when the trust is destroyed.
@@Terminatorfan-2016 Indeed! I must appreciate you are confident about what you want in life and instead of becoming someone's doormat you became free soul. I always admire and appreciate such enthusiasm for life. Trust me we will do better with no badmouth for any of the people who don't add value to our life. Trust me as a stranger and after knowing your story, I really liked the way you are. Be like this and remember who left us in between, They don't deserve us and they should not matter to us either way. Take care buddy 🙋
Just broke up with a guy after 7 months. Im so hurt, sad and lonely. I just want to be over it already. Hate seeing couples together at the moment, reminds me of what i don't have. Help 😢😢😢
She broke up with me because she said she needs time to find out who she is). I was dealing with it. Then got the information that she was literally planning the break up for more than 5 months and just acted like everything was fine in this time. Just using me for vacation, comfort, support. I just feel hate and worthlessness. I got played like never before by the only person I trusted. I feel stupid for letting them in my life. This really crushed me. And now (3 weeks later) got with the guy she told me not to worry about. I guess she "found" herself in him.
I'm so happy having my partner back after being separated for months.All thank to dr frank who help me to get back with my ex again,he has helped numerous number of people I will suggest you to get help from him
same thing happened. 3 heartbrokens by the same person over the course of 9 years. then she left me again but never comes back. but i foubd someone better but shes far and i love her but im too afraid she gonna leave me just the same as i dont want to ever have to gone thru such pain again. relationship is so dangerous
Thank you for everything you do Matthew, your content is helping me re-shifting focus and distract pain in this first week of my break up. My ex-partner ended the first serious relationship of my life, which lasted for 4 years. I am a mix of shock/denial/jealousy/depression at the moment and I can't seem to find a reason to be happy, or at least hopeful for the future.
You seem to be one of the only dating coaches who speaks to not just women which is very profound. Listening to other dating coaches you would think not only that women are the only ones who hurt from relationships but also that women are always the ones who are the problem or the ones dealing with the problem.
I'm not going through breakup not in a relationship even, but I love listening to you I feel like you speak from heart and you really want to make people feel better. God bless you for helping people when they go through one of the most difficult experience.
going through hell for over 2 years now... Can't even get a job or try to get a job... (I barely live from renting my house) Im getting fatter after being in shape for a while since all I do is, staying at home, gaming, watching movies & stuff... all because of a break-up... a relationship that I thought "it was THE ONE"...but it wasn't...
I feel like I went through hell after a rejection from and eventually losing contact with the one person I've fallen in love with. I cried pretty much every day for months, couldn't stop thinking about her and how things might've been if I hadn't made certain mistakes, listened to music I shouldn't be listening to (love songs, sad songs, sad love songs), had conversations with her in my mind and even out loud. All those kinds of things. However, recently I finally decided to let her go, to assume I'll never speak to her again (I'd love to be friends again one day, but shouldn't hope for it), and I gotta say I'm doing better now. I haven't fully healed yet, still think about her too much and I still wish things would be different, but talking to friends and also watching your videos have helped me feel a bit better. Thanks. And in case you’re reading this, dear (I know you like to watch these sorts of videos too), I hope you’re doing well. If you ever need anyone, don’t hesitate to call or message me (again, I’m assuming you won’t, but feel free). Those feelings from before might be fading, but I’ll always care for you, wish you love, happiness, strength, joy, serenity and anything else you need or want. Thanks for being my light for a while, all of the lessons I’ve learned and helping me realize I can care for and even fall in love with people. I ended my very first rhyme you knew was about you with these words: ‘You may be scarred, but as beautiful as ever’. That will always be true. Life has been quite ugly for you at times, but in my eyes you will always be beautiful.
Your words maybe perfect but that wont *DO* anything...from a girl who felt that his man did the same as you. We wont be reaching out or does this as you expect you ruined it then suffer it even twice. Well after all you must do what you gotta do.😉
@@georgered6867 I promised her I wouldn’t contact her, though. I’ve broken too many promises already. Well, mostly the same one multiple times, to give her the time and space she needed. Time to finally give her that.
I can agree when pain can change your memory of that person who caused it.....long distance relationship has been painful last year and i choose to end it when he gave me 3 months no contact. I dont accept silence thats the only thing im holding on to,to keep the relationship but he killed it. *NO ONE EXPECTS LOYALTY WHEN YOU DONT KNOW WHAT THEY DO,WHRE THEY ARE,WHO THEY ARE WITH EVEN FOR A DAY* Its a torture not relationship. I dont regret i hated him like hell for that.
Hi Matt, thank you for sharing this. It’s made me and I am sure so many others feel a little less alone when they are or continue to be in moments of hardship or darkness. Speaking about giving yourself care and doing the best you can with where you are was really powerful. It’s reminded me to take some pressure of myself!
Fully immersive experiences I have found help. In a small way speaking with a friend and hearing about their life, movies in a cinema, virtual reality, playing online games. Something that engages the senses brings you in the current moment where your mind has to take in whats happening now helps.
Hurting so much. I miss her but know she'll never take me back this time. I feel so empty. I'm a codependent pleaser and have little self respect or love for myself. I know i need to find and love myself.....with or without someone else in it. So hard for me. My mother always hated me and i got my value or lack of from that. Bless you all here. Let's try. xx
The physical pain that people can and do have. Not caused by emotions. Make it your best friend, know everything about it. Kind of like having a child.. Man it hurts but you know its temp and tomorrow will be glorious. Acknowledge your feelings and how bad it is.. dont stuff it deep down. Pain changes you totally. But it does not have to destroy you, lean it, learn you and how to cope and work with it. We all really do have the tools, self pity is not one of them.
Your words are so helpful thank you for sharing them! Got cheated on less than a month ago… after 5 years I thought she was the one but I now see things differently.
Bro stay strong it's never easy but it gets better.. I am going through a close to 4 yr break up as well seek clarity journal it.. In time you will receive inner peace I am seeking it too in time (got a month going through it too)
I am going through a breakup hell, it happened all of a sudden and the more I want to listen and be okay but all I want to do is fix it all and get him back
Yes, now I know the pain is real, as I lived in idealistic and fake world...and yes, there is panic, like freaking out about the pain, and fear or realizing I have to move on, also every day struggle... finding joy is important
This is so scary ... even after 5 years ... I m 37 single nvr married..he got married to another women here I don't hv time fr another more year to fall in love..
It just feels like there are no men around my age who actually want any sort of committed relationship... Or the ones that do are already taken. Makes dating feel like a chore of weeding out the bad ones. Or like all I'm doing is dodging bullets left and right 😅
Four days later and I’m doing a little bit better. Writing out my feelings and also going to the Gym has been helping. I’m know that it’s going to take time there steps forward one step back
I'm so happy having my partner back after being separated for months.All thank to dr frank who help me to get back with my ex again,he has helped numerous number of people I will suggest you to get help from him
I have gone through the video on going through a breakup hell, and it was a raw and honest portrayal of the pain and difficulties that come with heartbreak. The video's message that it's okay to feel lost and broken during a breakup can be comforting to anyone experiencing similar emotions. The video also offers helpful tips on self-care and moving forward in a healthy way. Thank you for sharing this relatable and insightful content.
I fell deeply in love with someone who didn’t love me. I felt both the highest highs, and the lowest lows. Giving up on the possibility of that relationship was so difficult, but I realised all the love I had for him could be love I gave to myself instead. My life felt like a mess at the time, and I wanted to focus on the idea of this amazing love I felt. I needed that love, for myself. I’m setting new boundaries, being more honest with myself, and rebuilding my life. It’s difficult, so much has changed. But I think I’ll be better and stronger in the end.
How are you doing? I'm in the same situation right now. The ending happened 3 days ago and I'm going through hell. Your comment is so motivating. I hope to be in a better place in a week, and a much, MUCH better place in a month. Impatiently waiting. 😭
@@calistar9444 aww I'm so sorry to hear that. It's not a simple answer. I think I have reached a point where I have accepted things for how they are... because I'm not really ready to date right now. But things are still messier than I would like. I love him, but in a more detached way. I'm okay with if things happen or if they don't (we had a sort of situationship type deal). My caring advice to you would be... keep your boundaries clear and stick with them. Write things down to remind yourself.
@@quendelf Thank you for your response. I'm glad to hear that you are more accepting and detached now. Acceptance and detachment is what I am praying for right now. I hope the universe grants it to me soon. Because non-acceptance and attachment feels so, so horrible. I know the love I have for him has changed. To what, I can't name yet. But it has definitely changed. I pray it goes away... Thank you for your advice. I will do that so I never forget. I wish you continued healing. 💛
Love this. Thank you ☺️💗. Rewriting my narrative of my past and reshaping my relationship with my pain. Oh yes, the fear that the pain will be with me forever was panic inducing. It's scary when the loss of hope drives you to your darkest hour. It's hard to believe that this too shall pass. Had to repeat this adage daily - this too shall pass 💕
It’s been 2 months since I walked away… I wish he wanted to put in the effort, instead he’d blame me for everything… It hurts… I wish things were different
I know it's hard bro, but day by day try to go over it, and most important remember you do it for yourself, you are the most important in your life. Don't do harm to yourself. This help me go throw day by day
Feel it, cry it out, walk, talk to friends, write it out, give yourself to God. Just don't numb yourself. After grieving comes anger, then again a bit grieving, then again anger, and you'll find balance Be kind to yourself
I'm so happy having my partner back after being separated for months.All thank to dr frank who help me to get back with my ex again,he has helped numerous number of people I will suggest you to get help from him
"The struggle itself towardsbl the hights is enough to fill a man's heart" - Albert Camus Its all about your perspectives! You can choose to let your pain burden you, or you can choose to use your pain to unburden your life.
Hi Matthew and Team! Your video helped me so much, I'm really grateful that you did it. I broke up with my boyfriend 3 months ago, and even though we had so many things in common, I had to leave. I found your point of view on creating a friendly bond with pain very helpful. I don't want to panic anymore. My ex boyfriend promised me that I am the one he's choosing, and he doesn't want anyone else. Then after 1,5 years, he became angry that he cannot do what he wants... And that thing is being polyamorous and have an open relationship. I have my standards, I couldn't cope with that, and he was aware of that since the beginning of our relationship. He told me that I am like a soup he has to eat every day. And it is my disadvantage that I am a monogamist. I let him and myself free. It had a huge impact on my sense of attractivity, nevertheless, I'm taking back my power. Again, thank you Matthiew so much
I can't imagine how painful this must be for you! My God. If someone even just mentions something like this, the thought alone will kill me! You are a very courageous woman, honestly.
It is so weird to be on the other side of the pain after a betrayal during a 20 year marriage. Totally over it. Dont even know why I held on. It feels good. It will happen everyone. Anxiety because of money is hard but that is the only thing left.
Thank you so much for this video! It has given me hope and faith that I can get through the extreme pain I am feeling right now. Sharing that you have been able work through such difficult times of your life, when you felt you could not get through, this gives me hope that I will be able to achieve this as well! Thank you!
Hi Matt, We go on to other relationships and move on from our pain. It's good to know that I can change my relationship with the pain. I love that you talk about physical pain. Thank you for that. My friend is going through stage four cancer. The panic and castrophysing is a process that I didn't see before. What can I do in spite of my pain as art is just beautiful matt. Betty
The closing on my house is not for another 2 months and I still live with him until then. He’s a gaslighter, a bread-crumber and his hobbies include giving hope and then rejecting. And also making it somehow my fault due to what I feel are not valid enough excuses. It sucks. It’s like… 1 step forward, 1 step back emotionally.
Situationships suck, I thought it’d turn to something serious some day. Ignored all red flags waiting for the day til she is comfortable and good to be official. But I was the one always coming to her rescues but never to mine when all I asked for was to be wanted. Or make this serious so we can move forward together and build our home . I gave too much too fast.
After 3 years decided with her to break up because we were toxic, she tried making up in December and 3 days in January and it ended all up in one nasty argument, she has been silent eversince, nothing. Seeing her new profile picture broke me, don't have hope for anything, even for pain going away.
The worst moment of the day - waking up in the morning - the first moment of consciousness - and this knot in the pit of your stomach, and wishing you could sleep forever…
The moment you first wake up & you dont remember anything for 2 peacefull seconds then it hits you so bad you wanna die
This is so painfully true
I feel you. I agree, for me the most difficult moment is the early morning. Even you wake up earlier than normally, your body wakes you up in alert just to feel that...
It gets better when you get up and start doing things..
Lately there are times where I feel more understood from ppl on RUclips than people around me...
Hey I’ve been there, I’m there again, I’d say if you live with someone, family etc, ask them to show up at your door at the time you wake up, so that right when you’re about to get up and deal with 2000 things in your mind, you see someone who talks about something else with you, this really helped me?
@@prachimurari8858 that's nice. I use youtube videos right after waking up and normally I can sleep a bit more with it 🙂
Just broken up (again) with the same man. I know it can't work. I've given everything I had. I am going to make my own 'happy' from now on. Will save my love for someone who wants to and has capacity to reflect it back to me. But now, I'm very very sad. Miss my man but know deep down this is right. It's hard to walk away from someone you love, but I have to love myself more.
Nice Video. My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love him so much I can't stop thinking about him, l've tried my very best to get him back in my life, but to no avail, I'm frustrated, I don't see my life as anyone else. I've done my best to get rid of the thoughts of him, but I can't, I don't know why I'm saying this here, I really miss him and just can't stop thinking about him.
I have been in such a situation. My relationship ended about two years ago, but I could not let him go, so I had to do all I could to get him back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual adviser who helped me bring him back, now we are back together, and I must say I am enjoying every moment...
Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do I reach one.?
His name is fatherabulu, and him is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex...
Thank you for this valuable information, I just looked him up online. impressive.
Been three months since my ex and I broke up. The pain has gone down, but every once in a while I get strong waves of sadness. Keep working on yourselves and don’t seek others. Trust I got desperate and even tried going out and it just made things worse. Build yourself up and be kind to yourself as well.
Just hit 3 months myself. If the wave isn't a tsunami that's knocking you down and carrying you away, good on you. Carry-on, soldier.
Waves of sadness is real...been 6 months i tried to make alot of distractions it helps alot.
This gives me hope
@@lv4230 It’s not easy bro. The thought of her still crosses my head. You have to focus on things that bring you happiness. Go workout, eat healthy, and hangout with friends/family. Also, don’t watch porn and jack off. Try to go on semen retention for a while (trust me on this one) Get rid of anything that reminds you of your ex. Good luck bro!
Same here...2 months of pain on & off...then 1/2 month it was ok finally!! Then I contacted him 2 days ago....he is not interested...and the pain is back :( Hope it will end sooner this time...it's exhausting
The worst feeling is losing your best friend. Or them acting so cold to you
Yes. Absolutely. Gave no real closure. And no time for us to discuss what is best for both of us. He was my best friend before dating. Nothing hurts more than having them want you to leaving you knowing that they are in pain not being with you, but knows it’s what’s best for right now.
That’s what I got after a relationship with a dismissive avoidant
The pain won't last it will pass,don't hang on to that one person step aside and move forward, ,watch motivational videos,meditate,ground yourself,do yoga,make a list of what your grateful for (very powerful) go out with friends make yourself busy don't put your life on hold because that person you thought won't ever leave you has moved on without a thought, and remember when one door closes another opens,trust the process.
Thank you for this 🙏🏽❤
One I read this it's really helpful but I feel this one door that closes and the other opening is going in favor of my ex and not me. I feel she's my everything and I lost and she will find someone more better than me and I can't find anyone like her again 😞😞💔💔💔
Thank u dear
Very powerful message. Thank you!
@@jesussaves4485 I feel the same way my ex i moved with to Fl got a new good job got tempted by more successful men and cheated. Now she has a good job and is with a new guy she had already found. Its been 2 months and it still hurts but i try to think of small positives i opened up a lot with my parents when i was hurt and reconnected with them and grew our relationship and also my brother i haven’t talked to in 4 years we reconnected nd now i have my brother back. Sometimes the doors that open may not be a partner but maybe other relationships, job, or even Peace within. Just try to hold it together nd not panic when the sad waves hit, it’ll pass and just take it one day at a time hope you find your peace and happiness again 🙏
Worse part of my life after my 5yrs relationship broke up, when you wake up in the morning, no text or call from someone you love, and knowing his not there forever i wanna plough my own grave😭😭😭
Same for me i cant even slepp but why gone be strong brother im there for you
I'm with you man.. Damn, I never thought it'd happen, but it did.
@@MonkeyDLuffy60073 stay strong brother you are not alone the boys are with you
It’s a painful experience but it’s time to re love yourself, put the things together, get going, what I learned from those heartbroken breakups, is those 3 words - life goes on, make a peace with the emotions and don’t try to hide or run away, face it and deal with it
@@summerhall1371 if you love someone set them free, if they'll love you they'll comeback..it hurts but if this is the best for the both of us let them swim.
Literally got cheated on yesterday and decided to leave. Definitely needed this.
Ditto. Perfect timing. We were engaged to be married. Having a tough time accepting it
@@sk4swatikapoor God has different plans for you dear.
Maybe he has kept someone better for you
Very strong of you.
Happened to me a couple months ago. I then let him back in my life. It brought temporary comfort, but it won’t last. Just prolonging the pain. Wishing everyone in these situations the strength to move on. 💚
Rach, you're so strong sis!
I’m going the breakup hell and I’m just lost of why it happened to me again. I tried so hard to protect myself and carefully watch out for the bad.
@Irina Ira tried again, gave a 2nd chance and i guess the person was never serious. Their mind changed 180 degree and texted you break up messages instead of a call. I deserve a call at least. Just a coward and a jerk.
Hey Tiffany! How are you doing now? I just went through a similar situation and I need to move on from him. I also tried so hard to guard my heart and not let my guard down, but I still got hurt when he left saying he was too busy with work and cannot offer me any thing more than a hookup. He said he wanted a relationship with me and I believed in that. Hope you are doing better now.
Please be kind to yourself. You tried to protect yourself but things went wrong. We don't have control over the course of events. Be compassionate to yourself and try to do whatever is possible in this situation including analysing the situation. You are not alone dear friend. ❤️❤️
@@3Sisters.23 same sis. I am going through so much pain rn. It was a 4 year old long relationship. Where he was the one telling me to put my guards down. He even told me we'll get married in a year. But he broke up with me on text 19 days ago.
@@mxhek1604 hey! I am so sorry this happened to you. I would urge you to take solace in the fact that he broke your heart before you two were married. I know the pain hits you like a wave and is unbearable, but you can try to think of it this way - one should try to marry somebody who has the courage to keep things going strong, and the one who breaks up is not that person.
When you still love the person, but had to walk away due to toxic behavior patterns on their end.
im 2 months into the break up after 6 years and a half relationship. everytime when things feel a lil better, the pain comes back 10x harder. its like an everyday nightmare
Hope you’re better now. I’m exactly the same as you did
@@jellybelly100100 yeah, it gets better. slow but yeah. better than nothing. next month will be 1 year and all i can say is that i dont miss her anymore but the triggers are still there
Only been 2 months for me and this is exactly true. 6.5 years of relationship, married this person.
It has been 4 1/2 years for me. Time did not heal me. I still cry everyday. The panic is gone. But the debilitating grief is constant. I've accepted the pain of losing the relationship I always dreamt of having in this life. I've had to accept the pain and the reality of crippling loneliness. Acceptance is the only thing time has given me.
Feelings changes. Go through your tantrums. Analyze your relationship. Take the lessons out of this. Find new hobby's. Keeps your thoughts in a journal. Meditate. Be grateful for this and move on.
Thank you🙏
Theres something so darn relatable about Matt, his tone is so comforting and reassuring. Experience is the greatest teacher . Thanks for your years of service to us Matt.
Agree
It's been a year. Even if I still have love for this half ass man. My worth meant more to me than someone who never appreciated what I brought to the table.
3,5 years in. Totally DEAD inside! Sleeping with the lights on and the mornings are the worst.
This pain is absolutely unbearable for me right now and there's absolutely nothing I can do but just go through it.
How are you today?
how r u
“When we have been through something extremely difficult, it gives our words deeper meaning.”
This video is so beautiful. And so helpful
Since 2015, Matthew you have helped me with break ups and my own self worth. I’m going through a new break up of a 2yr relationship, it’s been 3 weeks. My perception on pain due to a lot of your help over the years has made me go through this without devastation and it’s more peaceful. My control over heartbreak pain. I’m truly blessed. Thank you always.
You are beautiful and strong woman. If they can leave you, let them go. You deserve someone who will never doubt in you and cant live without you.
Time does help, but today rejection hurts almost physically. I need to be strong to not send a text, and am waiting hopefully for a day I won't care as much. Your videos help much, Matthew. Thank you.
I am going through this pain now.. Wanna move on.. I don't know how🙂.. But im not gonna chase that person who doesn't even care about me .. I ll get over
How r u doing right now
@@5uiii good it took me 3 yrs to get over from a toxic relationship.. Now I am happy. Healthy. Moved on
@@dreamergirl4294 good to hear that .. currently going through same phase ..
Everything changes and the right relationship isn’t brittle… these ideas of Matthew helped me make it! The new one to change our relationship with pain. Thank you Mat!
"The right relationship isn't brittle", changed my life. I'm 6 months post break-up. My relationship spontaneously combusted in about 20 seconds. Knowing this truth got me through it.
Healing really goes beyond helping oneself sometimes the wrong person just leaves a scar to be healed by the right one .
I really love your selection of words even in pain can I send you a dm pls
@@charlesrainfield3855 hey sure we are in same boat here.
Still getting through a breakup that happened last week. Thank you, Matthew for all of your videos. Definitely has helped me work through the pain bit by bit.
How are you doing???
@@lv4230 So much better! I focused on me and did no contact with the person. Now I'm moving forward in life and ready to start dating again.
@@AT-zb5in that makes me very happy to hear for you and it also gives me hope for me. I know the process can be different for all but hearing things like this does help I wish you happiness and peace on your journeys to come
@@lv4230 Thank you! And I wish you the same as well. Honestly, you will get there. Time is the biggest thing that helped me, while also taking into accountability of the role I played in allowing my ex to do that to me. You got this! I believe in you!
@@kingdomofanimosity2684 Hi Amal. I am doing much better! I didn't think it would be possible when it was so early after the breakup. I would think of sad thoughts wonder why it didn't work but little by little I started positive self talk. I would say it's ok he has a right to be with someone who is a better match for him and i deserve that too. I also started hearing positive podcast positive meditation and when i would get anxious i would listen to descriptive meditation walking reading and venting to my sister. You'll be better just work through the emotions and you'll see little by little you will accept it. Accepting it even if we don't like it is much better and healthier than beating a dead horse and forcing ourselves onto others. That's what I finally accepted. Best of luck . Your social platform friends are here to cheer you on.
Been with this beautiful woman for 16 months & we lived together. I feel like the relationship flashed before my eyes it's crazy. At times I wish this was all a dream & I can wake up from this reality & have everything back to how it was with her by my side smiling & laughing. RUclips videos keep me from getting so much anxiety & I can't be in my house all alone because then all the thoughts & memories come. I feel like the best part of my day is going to sleep at night & when I wake up in the morning the pain starts over. Can't wait for this feeling to go away
Hope you´re doing better now
There right now. How are you feeling now? How long did it take to finally start feeling better
I've had chronic physical pain for 8 years. 4 surgeries were performed and none of it helped. The pain and also feeling kinda hopeless changed me and changed my relationship.
I never gave up. Showing up at multiple doctors and agreeing on a 5th surgery. 3 weeks after this 5th surgery my former bf of 8-9 years broke up with me and immidiately replaced me.
Yes, i have been through hell. Not knowing if my body will ever work properly again, loosing the person I thought was the love of my life, had to quit my job and move in at my parent's tiny flat at age 34. My friends and family saved me from the worst.
Fast forward one year:
The surgery helped, I can finally enjoy life again. I found a really nice flat, also a new job. I know my true friends and am thankful every day. I do have a love life again.
Matthew, if you are reading this (I really hope you do): Your videos have helped me a lot dealing with heartache, getting over my ex and working on my self worth. Thank you so much for your work 💛 Wish you all the best!
Great Content! If you’re going through a breakup…
Personal Development is one of the best things you can do for yourself - because, we as human beings, we’re supposed to embrace growth!
So make sure you find your Purpose in life - whatever it might be, and work on it daily, and continue to make progress, because progress is - really the key to happiness.
But don’t do it for any girl or guy, make sure you’re doing it for yourself - and just be happy!
Anyway, that’s my two cents.
-Carlos Verde - Dating Tips
Remember to love yourself 1000x more for what they put you through. My X of 7 yrs destroyed & betrayed me. My mind forgives & ready to move on but my heart is injured trem due to his cruelty in the end. Why can't we end it like 2 decent human beings? Living is not easy esp on days I have to get up & go to work. I do love myself so much more for my poor heart & body. I do a lot of hot yoga & mediation. They do help! If u r like me, I give you hug. I feel u
He broke up with me 6 months ago…. I’m about to have his daughter 😭 it’s been SO difficult because I feel like I’m on a Teeter Totter of emotions. Excited and happy I’m finally going to be a mom but extremely sad her father left and never cared about me or this baby.
I’ve been doing serious work on myself to heal, haven’t dated or been with any men since he left, focusing on my health and doing my best to enjoy this pregnancy… all I want to do is hold my daughter.
She’s my reward. She’s my joy. She needs momma to bring her all the love and support so, with faith, I am healing for her and for me and leaving him behind so that the right man can show up and love us 🥰
I hear you girl, in a similar boat right now! He just left me in my pregnancy and didn't care about me or our child to be. Instead spewed alot of hate. Learning to rise above it and not internalize it...can't believe I survived an emotionally and physically abusive relationship
Oh God that's tough! I'm so sorry.
It’s been 2 weeks & 3 days since the love of my life of 7 years ended our journey together. The hardest thing is it came out of the blue & the reason is something I can’t do a damn thing about…. There was a 15yr age gap, I was the older woman and he just said he can’t see himself retiring happy with me as I’ll be too old. He’s 35.
I totally thought he was my future. We had a distance relationship mostly because he’s in the military but we coped really well with that & during the first lockdown he moved in with me. And ironically we grew closer & stronger during those 6 months.. so much so that we started looking at houses & even put an offer on one.
I’m not your typical 50yr old, I’ve never been married, I couldn’t have children & I have a friendship group of mainly 30+ yr olds as I’m more like them.
I really believed in the happy ending. We were best friends. We travelled the world over 7 years, laughed like drains, had so much fun.
He was the male equivalent of me & on the day he left I told him he was the best thing to happen to me.
And now I’m in darkness. I’ve had no contact with him for 2 weeks, the longest I’ve gone with no contact when he was in this country & I’m not afraid to admit I’m struggling. My whole future has changed in the blink of an eye & I feel like I’ve lost half of me. It’s painful to just breathe each day right now.💔
it's been two weeks since our breakup and no contact and im the older woman too. I'm 24 and he is 19, we too share a lot of things in common and the trust and understanding we have for each other. However, he ended things because he thinks that he is not ready for a romantic relationship. I hope we can both give each other a hug, everyday I can feel my heart breaking even though I told myself countless times that I support his decision and I try my best to look at the brighter side of things even though im hurting inside
This will pass! Everything on earth will passway only God's word stays the same! I broke up with my boyfriend of six months 3 weeks no contact. He has been on my mind I just reminded my self I broke up with that helps.
I’m in a similar situation. Together for 6 years. We had a 12 year age gap. I’m the older woman. He broke up with me 2 weeks ago because he wants to have his freedom. He wants to see other people and wants a life without me. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I understand how you are feeling. Just know it will get better, take it day by day and take care of yourself. Sending love to everyone who’s going through a heartache right now. ❤️
7 weeks on from my break up & 2 weeks ago I found out through social media that my ex had already found someone else before he broke up with me. So the age thing, everything he said was all lies. 3 times I asked if there was someone else & he was adamant there wasn’t. My heart broke all over again. The pain has been dreadful but my family have been amazing & I owe it to them to keep fighting to realise my worth. One day I hope I will
that's funny. My X ended out 7 yrs relationship abruptly. He married 2x. 2nd Mar lasted 7 yrs. Mine, his 3rd relationship he ended on our 7 yrs Anniv. See the pattern? I'm beyond broken & heart. I will try to remember his pattern. We don't deserve this at all, all deep love & faith put into. He said he's looking for the love of his life? Thanks for f** 7 yrs of my life. I fell in love with the wrong human being
Incredible transparency. I see his pain as he talks about it. It means a lot with my current struggle
I saw an old video of yours Mathew about toxic men, 7 years back, can't imagine how time flew. When I saw the topic of this video, it only made me smile. I smiled because I thought how it's going to benefit people the way it benefitted me when I was broken. We may never meet but I want to let you know you are a very big part of my healing process and I thank you very much for that.
Toxic man leaving my life after 5 years, damaged, cold and calculating alcoholic and prescription medication addict...hope to find this video
Indeed. Beginning a long process of introspection and reflection tend to yield many breakthroughs and give us the opportunity to understand ourselves better, and what our gifts, strengths, talents, weaknesses and pitfalls are. Pain itself is inevitable, so we shouldn't be afraid of being hurt - we just have to find out who's worth suffering for.
are you a poet?
I've been hurt once thats it. If you believe everything happens for a reason both good and bad then any break up is a God send. We all learn the hard way unfortunately so just know as much as you love someone if there not ment to be with you then your ment for someone else. I've been single for 2yrs now.
Thank you for this comment. I am going through a time of healing from a break up. It happened in Marche 2020. After almost 2 and a half year I feel relatively okay. My ex- wife still appreciated me for who I am. She left me although for the fact that we did not feel any attraction in an intimacy wat let alone sexually. It was completely understandable that the left me toe another man who could give her what she was missing out. I wanted her to go and start a new life. It was hard to loose my companion but it was for a reason. We still have some contact but things change. Het new boyfriend felt guilty about what happened and I could get along with hij for two years. Nog he is having more and more problems with me still having contact with both of them. I think I have to go through a second ' break up ' to make things work for myself. I don't want to loose my selfrespect and the only thing I want is just to go on with my own personal life. My ex wife feels sorry for me for what id happening now. I want to stop the contact with both of them because it brings me down again. I really like your comment in which you said that perhaps somebody else appreciated it to be with me ons day. Thank you so much for listing your comment. I know Matthew is there for the ladies but I can relatie to a lot of things that people are posting. By the way, I
am 69 years old and was married for more then 25 years. I still have to find my way but I will succeed, at least that is what I think😅. Wish you all the best from Portugal. I am Dutch myself.
@@g.j.schreuder7152 you sound very kind. Yeah everything happens for a reason like I said. And I held on to both the baby daddy who I was with for 15yrs and my ex I was engaged to for 8 months. It's all divine timing. My advice to you is think of you. Is it fair to you to waste your love on someone who doesn't want it? No being the answer. You was ment for someone else not her.
@@phoenixxx6427 Thank you for your reaction. It is a straight answer and I know I have to follow your advice. It is the only way to let go and put myself in first place. I think you did that already. It sounds very okay to hear from you, who is more or less unknown to me, that you are very to the point in your answer. Thanks for your information for what I should have done already more then a year ago. I wish you lots of wisdom to find your own way in your personal, private life. Gerard.
I got engaged, lived with the person I thought I was going to spend forever with and he woke up yesterday deciding he wants to do whatever he wants and live his life alone… most definitely feeling like I’m going through it
It hurts when the love of our life becomes a selfish jerk and break us
When we have been trying to fix him
I wish you a fast recovery
And i hope your heart heals soon
Stay strong Emily.
Last September my ex cheated on me and instead of trying to say sorry cos I probably would of taken him back he just went and we had been together for 3 years and was trying for a baby I was so hurt and cried I didn’t eat I was a mess for about 3 months. Matthew is right the pain changes it’s now April and don’t get me wrong it’s not easy but I am eating I don’t cry everyday and it’s changed I realise now I wasn’t meant to be with him. Something better out there for me and anyone who reads this I hope you know there is something better for you 💗 I immersed myself in Matthew videos 💕 it helps I literally listened to Matthew all day and night over and over and over again until some words sunk in if he should of he would of but he didn’t cos he didn’t want to and sometimes giving yourself a pep talk can help too. Sending love to anyone going through pain I promise it gets easier xxx
Only the Word of God will not pass away! Everything else will 🙏 give yourself to God, guard your heart 💜 ppl are not to be trusted or relied on!
When does it , she broke my heart ,
Great advice Matthew. Strong words. From experience, and I wish I knew this after my previous breakups... is you have to learn that feeling pain is all part of being alive, as is feeling love. You have to know that no matter what happened and how painful it is today, get up and believe that you will be ok, you will learn from the experience, you will make better choices next time, you will be a stronger you... in time. Be confident in your own strength and grow from it. The next time it happens, you'll be able to cope with the pain in a better way.
I’m so glad you recovered from this dark place…your videos have helped me so much. Thank-you.
I adored this! I really didn’t need a ‘snap out of it’ ‘stop being ungrateful’ kind of thing. This was very comforting
I also agree going through the pain made me a stronger person.
I’m think I’m about to walk away from someone I love so dearly. It hurts because I don’t want to, but deep down I know I have to. He has expressed multiple times he is unsure about us, he is hot and cold, and my mental health is taking a toll from the confusion he has. I need to get ready for this breakup 💔
Hopefully you read this.
Talk to him about it and tell him how you're feeling. Read your comment to him if you have to.
He obviously has his reasons for his behaviour, and your goal should be to get him to explain it so you understand.
Don't throw the relationship away just because you're confused.
Use the opportunity to have the conversation now and potentially save the situation while you still can. Once you end the relationship, you cant have this conversation and you'll perhaps look back in future and wish you had.
Get out before you dig yourself in more! If they told you that nothing will change. if you keep staying he will get another woman and he will make you regret the day you were born. I know it can be so hard but you can do it! You deserve better have selflove 🙏
How are you doing now? I'm in the same situation right now. I should have broken up with him but I didn't. And he broke up with me first and now I'm going through hell. It's been 3 days and I cannot wait for this week/month to be over and feel better already.
I must be one of a few that just can't control my ego 😭 it's been 3 years since we split and my heart is still broken. I cry nearly everyday cos I know I was the reason why we broke up. It hurts so much! I love him so much!
I am too but what hurts is it’s not a problem that can’t be fixed. No one was physical or no one cheated anything to that level. The problem just needed my attention and for me to fix it but he still doesn’t believe That I will change. I don’t think the reason is worth ending a 5 year relationship over. But that’s up to him and all I can do now is wait till he decides if we stay or split for good
@@queenrashell I'm in the same situation I broke up with him because he was not calling me enough! Last time I called him he said he will call me back but took him two days to call. That made feel I was not important to him anymore. small things add up led me to break up with him!I just was so confused about our relationship 😔 I have talked to him about this issues I feel like he didn't care if I stay or go😫
Did you try to rectify the situation and tell him how you'd improve?
I had been there done that … just what you went through nowdays when I went something difficult being rejection in relationship, work issues etc etc I won’t panic or breakdown badly instead deal it the current issues, and moving forward…. Its called keep continue living !
This came at the right moment. A month ago my ex cheated on me and replaced me with her. They’re still together and I’m miserable
I just went through breakup hell, but y'know it's true what the experts say: after 11 weeks I'm ok again. You really can make it to the other side. But the most important thing that I believe really helped is that I was sober for many months from drugs & alcohol prior to the breakup. I'm really glad I didn't go back to substance abuse to deal with it, and I'm thankful I didn't TRY to get sober during it! Sobriety provided the focus I needed to look for answers and that's how I discovered Matthew Hussey. Thanks Matt for helping me to sort out my pain & confusion!
Anyone watching this is definitely going through a tough break up or divorce and seeking ways to successfully get through it.
This is a great video and it's always good to hear people give the right advice and suggestions on how to deal with troubles like this. I just got out of a relationship that was almost for 4 years. We were both very much in love, we had planned a future, everything seemed a okay, and it seemed like it was a good healthy relationship. What could have gone wrong? Well what went wrong is that towards the end, she revealed to me that she cheated on me and that she was seeking attention from people who would give her the attention she wanted. It turned out that she didn't know what she wanted, who she wanted, and didn't really take the relationship seriously. Definitely opposite of what I had thought. I can never trust her again. In my eyes, she'll always be a liar and a cheater, which is why moving on from her was the best choice. I'm not going to waste my time with someone who doesn't know what they want. I love who I am and I'll always be me no matter what. Now as far as why she cheated, it's because she didn't like my looks, which I love, she didn't like my personality, which I love, and she didn't like my hobbies, which I love. She feels that anybody who isn't the hardcore overly macho borderline violent hyper-masculine bad boy is too soft. I'm not that but I'm not a soft person who's a doormat either. I'm a regular strong confident gentleman, but even that was too soft for her. She didn't like that I collected comic books and action figures and superhero t-shirts. I never put those above her or our relationship, but she just didn't like that I was into that in general. So instead of telling me what she liked and disliked in the beginning, she wasted my time which is the biggest offense of all. So that's my story. I'm not a victim and nobody is, but I'm still as always being my authentic self and getting through it. Save my strength and energy for someone who's serious about relationships.
Yes Dear be ready for new roller ☺️ coaster in life. And leave such people with their perceptions and mentality.
this helped me. thanks.
@@amylamb2768 thank you for the comment. I'm really happy my story helped you. I wish you the best of luck with what you're dealing with. It is a very tough situation. Especially when the trust is destroyed.
@@soniya503 believe me I am ready 😊 Thank you for your comment. It is hard to trust people with that kind of mentality for sure.
@@Terminatorfan-2016 Indeed! I must appreciate you are confident about what you want in life and instead of becoming someone's doormat you became free soul. I always admire and appreciate such enthusiasm for life. Trust me we will do better with no badmouth for any of the people who don't add value to our life. Trust me as a stranger and after knowing your story, I really liked the way you are. Be like this and remember who left us in between, They don't deserve us and they should not matter to us either way. Take care buddy 🙋
I’ve felt this way for many years. Time doesn’t heal anything on it’s own.
Just broke up with a guy after 7 months. Im so hurt, sad and lonely. I just want to be over it already. Hate seeing couples together at the moment, reminds me of what i don't have. Help 😢😢😢
She broke up with me because she said she needs time to find out who she is). I was dealing with it. Then got the information that she was literally planning the break up for more than 5 months and just acted like everything was fine in this time. Just using me for vacation, comfort, support. I just feel hate and worthlessness. I got played like never before by the only person I trusted. I feel stupid for letting them in my life. This really crushed me. And now (3 weeks later) got with the guy she told me not to worry about. I guess she "found" herself in him.
I'm so happy having my partner back after being separated for months.All thank to dr frank who help me to get back with my ex again,he has helped numerous number of people I will suggest you to get help from him
same thing happened to me, 4 years gone for someone he met in less than a year, right after we broke up only a week ago 🙃
same thing happened. 3 heartbrokens by the same person over the course of 9 years. then she left me again but never comes back. but i foubd someone better but shes far and i love her but im too afraid she gonna leave me just the same as i dont want to ever have to gone thru such pain again. relationship is so dangerous
Thank you for everything you do Matthew, your content is helping me re-shifting focus and distract pain in this first week of my break up.
My ex-partner ended the first serious relationship of my life, which lasted for 4 years. I am a mix of shock/denial/jealousy/depression at the moment and I can't seem to find a reason to be happy, or at least hopeful for the future.
You will I'm also hoping to get through this it's a month since my gf broke up with me
Heartbroken tonight . Thank you for this. Lessons on impermanence. It won’t feel like this forever
You seem to be one of the only dating coaches who speaks to not just women which is very profound. Listening to other dating coaches you would think not only that women are the only ones who hurt from relationships but also that women are always the ones who are the problem or the ones dealing with the problem.
Two years ago you helped me a lot after brake up, i am so grateful
I'm not going through breakup not in a relationship even, but I love listening to you I feel like you speak from heart and you really want to make people feel better. God bless you for helping people when they go through one of the most difficult experience.
going through hell for over 2 years now... Can't even get a job or try to get a job... (I barely live from renting my house) Im getting fatter after being in shape for a while since all I do is, staying at home, gaming, watching movies & stuff... all because of a break-up... a relationship that I thought "it was THE ONE"...but it wasn't...
Therapy helps!
I feel your pain..hopefully you get help or have someone to support you during the tough times. I tried ACT after my break up and it helps immensely
You will be ok. I send you hope, love, and blessings ❤
I feel like I went through hell after a rejection from and eventually losing contact with the one person I've fallen in love with. I cried pretty much every day for months, couldn't stop thinking about her and how things might've been if I hadn't made certain mistakes, listened to music I shouldn't be listening to (love songs, sad songs, sad love songs), had conversations with her in my mind and even out loud. All those kinds of things.
However, recently I finally decided to let her go, to assume I'll never speak to her again (I'd love to be friends again one day, but shouldn't hope for it), and I gotta say I'm doing better now. I haven't fully healed yet, still think about her too much and I still wish things would be different, but talking to friends and also watching your videos have helped me feel a bit better. Thanks.
And in case you’re reading this, dear (I know you like to watch these sorts of videos too), I hope you’re doing well. If you ever need anyone, don’t hesitate to call or message me (again, I’m assuming you won’t, but feel free). Those feelings from before might be fading, but I’ll always care for you, wish you love, happiness, strength, joy, serenity and anything else you need or want. Thanks for being my light for a while, all of the lessons I’ve learned and helping me realize I can care for and even fall in love with people. I ended my very first rhyme you knew was about you with these words: ‘You may be scarred, but as beautiful as ever’. That will always be true. Life has been quite ugly for you at times, but in my eyes you will always be beautiful.
Exact same my friend. It hurts. Onwards and upwards.
Your words maybe perfect but that wont *DO* anything...from a girl who felt that his man did the same as you. We wont be reaching out or does this as you expect you ruined it then suffer it even twice. Well after all you must do what you gotta do.😉
@@georgered6867 Like I said, I assume she won’t reach out. I just wanted to share how I feel now.
@@ZenoGoreng must pursue then and keep on....(me too m just saying this to him😅🤣)
@@georgered6867 I promised her I wouldn’t contact her, though. I’ve broken too many promises already. Well, mostly the same one multiple times, to give her the time and space she needed. Time to finally give her that.
I can agree when pain can change your memory of that person who caused it.....long distance relationship has been painful last year and i choose to end it when he gave me 3 months no contact. I dont accept silence thats the only thing im holding on to,to keep the relationship but he killed it. *NO ONE EXPECTS LOYALTY WHEN YOU DONT KNOW WHAT THEY DO,WHRE THEY ARE,WHO THEY ARE WITH EVEN FOR A DAY* Its a torture not relationship. I dont regret i hated him like hell for that.
Hi Matt, thank you for sharing this. It’s made me and I am sure so many others feel a little less alone when they are or continue to be in moments of hardship or darkness. Speaking about giving yourself care and doing the best you can with where you are was really powerful. It’s reminded me to take some pressure of myself!
I really don't know ..what is this ..but your video drops exactly when I needed it the most💜 thanks a lot Matthew
Fully immersive experiences I have found help. In a small way speaking with a friend and hearing about their life, movies in a cinema, virtual reality, playing online games. Something that engages the senses brings you in the current moment where your mind has to take in whats happening now helps.
Hurting so much. I miss her but know she'll never take me back this time. I feel so empty.
I'm a codependent pleaser and have little self respect or love for myself. I know i need to find and love myself.....with or without someone else in it. So hard for me. My mother always hated me and i got my value or lack of from that.
Bless you all here. Let's try. xx
The physical pain that people can and do have. Not caused by emotions. Make it your best friend, know everything about it. Kind of like having a child.. Man it hurts but you know its temp and tomorrow will be glorious. Acknowledge your feelings and how bad it is.. dont stuff it deep down. Pain changes you totally. But it does not have to destroy you, lean it, learn you and how to cope and work with it. We all really do have the tools, self pity is not one of them.
Your words are so helpful thank you for sharing them! Got cheated on less than a month ago… after 5 years I thought she was the one but I now see things differently.
Same here. Got cheated on and stayed with him for months after only to realise I'm just delaying the inevitable. It will get better
Bro stay strong it's never easy but it gets better.. I am going through a close to 4 yr break up as well seek clarity journal it.. In time you will receive inner peace I am seeking it too in time (got a month going through it too)
@@heber2418 thanks bud definitely looking forward when this pain goes away. Stay strong!
I am going through a breakup hell, it happened all of a sudden and the more I want to listen and be okay but all I want to do is fix it all and get him back
hi does it get better?
Yes, now I know the pain is real, as I lived in idealistic and fake world...and yes, there is panic, like freaking out about the pain, and fear or realizing I have to move on, also every day struggle... finding joy is important
I hope god will heal all of your hearts
Bless you all 🙏🙏
After 5 years it still hurts
This is so scary ... even after 5 years ... I m 37 single nvr married..he got married to another women here I don't hv time fr another more year to fall in love..
It just feels like there are no men around my age who actually want any sort of committed relationship... Or the ones that do are already taken. Makes dating feel like a chore of weeding out the bad ones. Or like all I'm doing is dodging bullets left and right 😅
Four days later and I’m doing a little bit better. Writing out my feelings and also going to the Gym has been helping. I’m know that it’s going to take time there steps forward one step back
I'm so happy having my partner back after being separated for months.All thank to dr frank who help me to get back with my ex again,he has helped numerous number of people I will suggest you to get help from him
the plane sound at 6:35 gives me chills
The worst is losing the love of your life 😪
I have gone through the video on going through a breakup hell, and it was a raw and honest portrayal of the pain and difficulties that come with heartbreak. The video's message that it's okay to feel lost and broken during a breakup can be comforting to anyone experiencing similar emotions. The video also offers helpful tips on self-care and moving forward in a healthy way. Thank you for sharing this relatable and insightful content.
This advice was really well said Matthew! You bring comfort to so many x
Emotions have always just been something that happens to me
I fell deeply in love with someone who didn’t love me. I felt both the highest highs, and the lowest lows. Giving up on the possibility of that relationship was so difficult, but I realised all the love I had for him could be love I gave to myself instead. My life felt like a mess at the time, and I wanted to focus on the idea of this amazing love I felt.
I needed that love, for myself.
I’m setting new boundaries, being more honest with myself, and rebuilding my life. It’s difficult, so much has changed. But I think I’ll be better and stronger in the end.
So sorry. That is a terrible experience. Been there. The person remains the "once in a lifetime" for me.
How are you doing? I'm in the same situation right now. The ending happened 3 days ago and I'm going through hell. Your comment is so motivating. I hope to be in a better place in a week, and a much, MUCH better place in a month. Impatiently waiting. 😭
@@calistar9444 aww I'm so sorry to hear that. It's not a simple answer.
I think I have reached a point where I have accepted things for how they are... because I'm not really ready to date right now. But things are still messier than I would like. I love him, but in a more detached way. I'm okay with if things happen or if they don't (we had a sort of situationship type deal).
My caring advice to you would be... keep your boundaries clear and stick with them. Write things down to remind yourself.
@@quendelf Thank you for your response. I'm glad to hear that you are more accepting and detached now. Acceptance and detachment is what I am praying for right now. I hope the universe grants it to me soon. Because non-acceptance and attachment feels so, so horrible.
I know the love I have for him has changed. To what, I can't name yet. But it has definitely changed. I pray it goes away...
Thank you for your advice. I will do that so I never forget.
I wish you continued healing. 💛
You are strong
It's so inspiring to see you staying strong and loving yourself no matter what
Thanks Mathew. Going through a rough time right now. Needed some encouragement.😢
Love this. Thank you ☺️💗.
Rewriting my narrative of my past and reshaping my relationship with my pain.
Oh yes, the fear that the pain will be with me forever was panic inducing. It's scary when the loss of hope drives you to your darkest hour. It's hard to believe that this too shall pass. Had to repeat this adage daily - this too shall pass 💕
It’s been 2 months since I walked away… I wish he wanted to put in the effort, instead he’d blame me for everything… It hurts… I wish things were different
This is my story. I’m almost 6 weeks in. How are you feeling these days? Please tell me it gets better.
This is incredible helpful- your discussion on chronic pain management is so helpful.
I haven't eaten in 5 days just sleeping my ❤ hurts 😫
Navratri ka vrat h kya aapka?
I know it's hard bro, but day by day try to go over it, and most important remember you do it for yourself, you are the most important in your life. Don't do harm to yourself. This help me go throw day by day
Feel it, cry it out, walk, talk to friends, write it out, give yourself to God. Just don't numb yourself. After grieving comes anger, then again a bit grieving, then again anger, and you'll find balance
Be kind to yourself
It’s been four years and the pain is still excruciating.
Not sure how I’m gonna get out of this pit, I am so so low
Thanks Matt. This means a lot to me and watching your videos re-assures me that everything will be fine.
I'm so happy having my partner back after being separated for months.All thank to dr frank who help me to get back with my ex again,he has helped numerous number of people I will suggest you to get help from him
W h a t s a a p h i m👇
Going through a breakup of one year right now. Feeling this.
Please more videos about break ups & moving on
"The struggle itself towardsbl the hights is enough to fill a man's heart" - Albert Camus
Its all about your perspectives! You can choose to let your pain burden you, or you can choose to use your pain to unburden your life.
Hi Matthew and Team! Your video helped me so much, I'm really grateful that you did it. I broke up with my boyfriend 3 months ago, and even though we had so many things in common, I had to leave.
I found your point of view on creating a friendly bond with pain very helpful. I don't want to panic anymore.
My ex boyfriend promised me that I am the one he's choosing, and he doesn't want anyone else. Then after 1,5 years, he became angry that he cannot do what he wants... And that thing is being polyamorous and have an open relationship. I have my standards, I couldn't cope with that, and he was aware of that since the beginning of our relationship. He told me that I am like a soup he has to eat every day. And it is my disadvantage that I am a monogamist.
I let him and myself free.
It had a huge impact on my sense of attractivity, nevertheless, I'm taking back my power. Again, thank you Matthiew so much
I can't imagine how painful this must be for you! My God. If someone even just mentions something like this, the thought alone will kill me! You are a very courageous woman, honestly.
It is so weird to be on the other side of the pain after a betrayal during a 20 year marriage. Totally over it. Dont even know why I held on. It feels good. It will happen everyone. Anxiety because of money is hard but that is the only thing left.
Thank you so much for this video! It has given me hope and faith that I can get through the extreme pain I am feeling right now. Sharing that you have been able work through such difficult times of your life, when you felt you could not get through, this gives me hope that I will be able to achieve this as well! Thank you!
Hi Matt,
We go on to other relationships and move on from our pain.
It's good to know that I can change my relationship with the pain.
I love that you talk about physical pain. Thank you for that.
My friend is going through stage four cancer.
The panic and castrophysing is a process that I didn't see before.
What can I do in spite of my pain as art is just beautiful matt.
Betty
The closing on my house is not for another 2 months and I still live with him until then. He’s a gaslighter, a bread-crumber and his hobbies include giving hope and then rejecting. And also making it somehow my fault due to what I feel are not valid enough excuses. It sucks. It’s like… 1 step forward, 1 step back emotionally.
Growth -not self abandoning ❤
Situationships suck, I thought it’d turn to something serious some day. Ignored all red flags waiting for the day til she is comfortable and good to be official. But I was the one always coming to her rescues but never to mine when all I asked for was to be wanted. Or make this serious so we can move forward together and build our home . I gave too much too fast.
After 3 years decided with her to break up because we were toxic, she tried making up in December and 3 days in January and it ended all up in one nasty argument, she has been silent eversince, nothing. Seeing her new profile picture broke me, don't have hope for anything, even for pain going away.
He has left me and gone back to his old girlfriend. Desperate without him. Unable to sleep.
How are you doing now?
Take deep breaths. Like the man said " Don't panic"
If someone or something gave so much Suffering, don't allow yourself to further add more pain
17 year relationship, she wants out and this is killing me
I hate that drug withdrawal feeling of a breakup!
Learning so much from you and other creators. Thank you.
Thank you, this was exactly what I needed to hear today, it helped me so much🙏
Your videos always mean so much.
In my entire life i had 2 breakups with the same girl. 10 years in between
I love her more than anything else
I understand what you are going through
@@anotherme2690 thanks man