This is so honest I love that we’re breaking down the reality of wigs and weaves in the black community. If it was all about length or low maintenance, ppl would be wearing 70s Afros and wigs that actually proudly match black hair.
@@holycow1697 Exactly.🎯 It started with her very ignorant mother and grandmother brainwashing her that her natural hair was ugly. There are many of them out here like that even still today. I knew a woman that was always criticizing her daughter on her afro which was so cute. A lot will tolerate braids, but just don't have it free and loose because they lose it then. Their minds are still in shackles. SMH.😚
Yessss, that is where all those insecurities come from family.. I'm a twin, and I was considered the fat one because, I had a butt.. and my twin was slim and taller, but the thing is, I wasn't fat just shorter with a shape.. It kind of scarred me.. Still to this day, people in my family say that.. But I'm 51 and still look fabulous..
@Stephanie Cobb Sometimes, your blood is your worst enemy. I will be 50 this year. I look better than most women my age. If you saw me walking down the street, you would never know what I been through or have children and grandchildren. We are Blessed by the best 👌 👍🏼 😍
@@Vale10952 beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Who are you to tell me what I see? Also, why did you feel the need to project your ugly personality onto me? I wish you the best and hopefully you can rise above the negativity that is clearly rotting your soul
@barbaraplaisance2515 Okay, so next time, don't make public comments and feel entitled to others' opinions. You lie related to bw looks just like most people online.
@@latoyaroy8516 based off her comment an lookin at her hair I doubt wha u said is accurate. No matter how unkempt they felt it was they should've just supported her.. bt based off how she said it I believe they made her fell less than attractive for not havin the permed or silky white girl look
First off we are the only people on earth who attack our own children and make them have low self esteem...and then when they grow up to hate themselves we say 'what is wrong with her!' It's a sick,sick cycle and what's even sadder is her own mother whom suppose to love,support and boost her self esteem up was riping her to shreds!!!! The black community is screwed up...sis you are beautiful.
We as moms, especially to girls, have the MOST responsibility to bring our daughters up with high self esteem and loving themselves. I make it a point every single day to tell my daughters something I love about them, how smart they are, how beautiful they are, how incredible their hair looks today, etc. The amount of women I hear these days that had moms tear them down like this is devastating and continuing the cycle.
I love that!!! I commend you for that I so wished I had that. Family would always say something negative about my natural hair so it always felt like a problem that needed to be fixed. I wore my afro out today for a funeral and felt so insecure that I didn’t even take pictures. However, for the past 3 years now I have been embracing my natural hair, learning how beautiful it is, and how to take care of it. It’s still a process. God bless!!🙏🏾❤️
@@ndiacarter450 I'm so sorry you had family that tore you down like that. I keep hearing stories like that (and can relate) and I can't imagine hurting my child like that. All it takes is ONE negative comment to give a lifetime of insecurity and that's devastating. I bet your hair looked incredible at the funeral and I'm so sad society has made women (and men) with curly hair feel bad about it, yet some also put archaic policies in place about no braids, dreads, etc. Like what the heck are you supposed to do then if it's all looked at badly?! I'm so glad natural hair and afros are becoming more embraced. Wear your hair with pride babe, I bet you looked amazing! 🤍
My mom died when I was 11 so the only women who I had near were aunts and grandma, they as a full adult women told me several times I was ugly I could be fat all my life and no one would love me because who I am. Thought always they were telling the truth and I develop ED, still feel ugly and repeat alwys to myself those were lies and stupidity from them. The women near women are not always kind with their words.
@@Nunyabiz17 I understand how you feel because my father would do that to me, that really destroyed me. I didn’t like to socialize and sometimes I thought I am not worthy of being loved because I was ugly. I hated dressing up because I was overweight and everyone around me made it a big deal. Now I’m confident and don’t care what others say about me. As a grew older I realized that if I was going to live by what others say then I would never be happy.
@@burbuvs8911 I’m glad now you know those are lies, stupidity and jealous. They must have narcissistic personality disorders or other personality disorders. I hope you are away from them and safe
Yeah I have curly hair and I would leave it in a ponytail and she would be like why you wearing your hair like that do something but I absolutely feel her pain
@@finealfor275 It's sad, really sad that we can't enjoy how we look and we can't help our children feel good about themselves either, if I wanted to have children I would try to avoid repeat that pattern of behavior
I’m light skin and my cousin is dark skin, my mama would buy me both white and black dolls, my cousin threw her black doll away because of the colorism that goes on in the blk community. I hated it, I would defend her all the time from our own people. Ugh 😫
I feel her pain. Family will tear you down because in reality you are beautiful and they don’t want you to see it. This made me sad for her cause I’ve been there.
I feel this. My older brother would do the same to me. I felt so embarrassed I didn’t even wanna leave the house at one point. I’m still working through those issues 😢
Some Parents kill their children’s spirits. This woman is beautiful and it’s sad she still carry’s the scars of what her mother said to her about her hair.
I went through this with my mom she use to tell me she was get my plastic surgery when I get older but honestly I always knew it wasn’t malicious or malcontent it was because of the way she raised and I think she thought she was helping me but never understood this something I have to live with so telling me I should change is not helping it’s teaching not to love my self for who I am and I did have that mindest at first I hated my nose but I grew into it and love myself more than I thought I ever would
@@prettylittlething9935 You’re a beautiful young lady, I’m sorry your family does that to you. It’s unfortunate we can’t choose our family. Surround yourself around people who celebrate you not tolerate you. Take care of you darling♥️
@@justjoanneofficial thank you yes I understood my mom was only projecting what she was taught and unfortunately my family wasn’t nice to my mom either but she never said in a mean way always as a joke but I don’t think she knew how much it hurt me that my own mom wanted me to change how I look but yes I took a lot of self love and learning on my own but I know better now and have kids of my own so I definitely breaking the cycle ❤️
Just say she's beautiful. "Actually" is as if she barely made your opinionated cut. This is a sensitive subject and being raised in the era of relaxers and 4 sisters, this hits home.
My dear lady...you are beautiful, just the way you are. Your natural hair is gorgeous...no need to hide it....please, go out with your natural hair...it's all good!!❤
I know words are hard, and some people lack the ability to understand context so I guess I’ll help. The context of the video was that she had to wear so much product and still was made to feel inferior. When in fact, she was more attractive than many people without a stitch of make up on. Soooo, the word “actually” had nothing to do with the idea you’re trying to insinuate A&A… cool join account.
Truth!! But a lot of people in the black community has made fun of a lot of young black girls with natural hair. Work places have called natural hair unprofessional. Some boarding schools and day schools have made little black girls feel that their hair isn't beautiful or professional and need to be tamed. With constant bashing from society and their own home, one starts to believe that as a reality until they truly accept themselves and appreciate themselves. E.G. my natural was made fun of so many times, I was made to relax my hair because they said it was unkempt. I grew out of the feeling like wearing a wig to fit societal norms. Now I feel like F societal norms and F people & their opinions. I got locs and walk like the streets are my runway. My life, I make the final say. Someone has a problem with it then or well, too bad for them for being nosy. The black community talks about the world accepting us as we are but we are the first to clown a person who chooses to keep their natural hair that naturally grows out of our heads!!! Isn't it weird that we even need a natural hair movement? God blessed us to be able to hold various styles but the slave mentality has not left people's mind and that is unfortunate
@@pennyck9468 that'd so true once I went to my jamaican nas house and she was like go and come your hair because I had a afro and I was like why she said because its messy... I really don't show emotions like that but I'm sure if a black girl heard that they would be upset but it's mainly because of racism and how in the old days black people had to have there hair in a straight haired person style not mentioning race👀
My five year old daughter told me that she liked my weave style but enjoyed my REAL hair better. That is 9 years ago now. I have not touched a weave since.
You are a Beautiful woman. Don't ever let anyone say you are not! People who say you are ugly..they are ugly inside Feel your power and never forget you ARE Beautiful!.
When she said her mom and sister ridiculed her--it made me tear up. That's so heartbreaking to hear. I hope she can sit with that pain and hurt and find solace in her natural beauty. She is truly beautiful ❤️
My mom and siblings did the same. No one hates black people more than black people! Especially the women!!!! It's way different nowadays but a few years ago?! WHEW the self hate was beyond real. They'll gaslight you into believing that they were wigs for 'protection' (which many black women do) but MOST do not! Most literally dont know how to even do their NATURAL hair or even how to wear it out
Looking at her beautiful face say “I feel ugly” because of a wig and the people who didn’t allow her to embrace her natural hair is WILDDDD . You’re beyond beautiful sis ❤️❤️❤️
She looks so beautiful. It is incredibly sad to think that she felt ugly because of other people bullying her into changing her appearance. I hope she sees herself for the gorgeous individual she truly is.
It's not just other people, which wouldn't affect someone as much, but it's her family saying it. You make it sound like it was a bunch of strangers saying it.
They were jealous boo. Sometimes we ignore the shade from family bc you say to yourself "no way, what could they possibly envy about me?" But they envied your confidence and the fact that you loved yourself.
My mother and grandmothers used to do the same thing to me. I don't believe it was so much of envy as it was a mindset based in the conditioning of Eurocentric standards of beauty and what's considered presentable and attractive that's been engrained in us for centuries.
Sis, I can name so many things about you that are beautiful...your face, specifically your eyebrows, eyes, nose, and omg, your teeth are amazing. On the inside, based on your responses and comments, you seem calm and reasonable. To me, that's a genuine and kind person. You're a beautiful black woman. Own it.
She’s so beautiful naturally and with her makeup on too!! They were just jealous af smh 🤦🏽♀️ if you’re reading this, YOU ARE BEAUTIFULLLL!! Don’t let ppl who don’t love themselves ever make you hate yourself, KEEP SHINING AND THRIVING AND TAKING CARE OF YOURSELF! ♥️♥️♥️
@@Lost_souls_lose_freedom Other races don't have the same hair as black people hence why the experiences are different and come with different challenges.
😢😢 i totally relate. I'm over 30 years old and i went to visit my mom a while back wearing my natural hair (we live in different cities) and she asked the same questions.."are u going to do something with your hair? ..." And i explained to her that I've embraced my natural texture i love wearing my curly hair.... She went out to the store for groceries.. when she came back she put a box perm on the bed and said "here this is for you"..... I cannot verbalize how deeply hurtful that was and still is for me. It took me back to being the little girl whose long beautiful hair she burned off with relaxers for years.. it still makes me tear up. Had it been anyone else i don't think it would've been so bad.
As a hairstylist it's a fact that most non African Americans think your natural, un-relaxed hair is gorgeous.. Just understand that we live in a jealous world that tries to break down everything it envies 😔
This is actually exactly what I was thinking. I could be completely wrong- but I've noticed that the people bullying African Americans the most about their hair seems to be their own family members/eachother. Like they project their own insecurities on others should they dare have the confidence to wear their natural hair. I've always thought it was beautiful. God doesn't make mistakes. He gave everyone the hair they were born with because it's beautiful!!!!
@@elizabethbryant2958 That's a whole different thing, lol! It's rude as hell to do that to anyone without asking. Even if they do ask, I don't think I would be able to help feeling like a zoo animal. Unless it's a kid
@@bl0pez772 it also doesn’t help that it was ingrained in our parents head too that our natural hair is messy, unprofessional and not ideal. It’s generational trauma
Yep!!! Older black women absolutely HATE!!! To see the younger black women embracing their hair. Even the church ladies said “ need to do something with my hair” when I first loc’d my hair I was called ugly… now the same people love my hair 4 years later 🙏🏾💕 just hold on don’t ever fold on what God gives you
I am sorry that happened to you. Many of us at the church I attend don’t wear make or worry that our hair is pressed to societies perspective standard of beautiful. We’re all beautiful and embrace one another.
My Christian nan just couldn't get over my natural hair. Each time I'd see her , it's 'when you doing your hair' . After a while , I realised what she was doing , I just asked , do you believe in God? Well God made me like this , who am I to say it's wrong. She stopped after that.
This is facts. My grandmother hates my aunt's natural hair. Me on the other hand wear weaves and my grandmother always complement me. She's gonna be shocked next time she see me cause I'm rocking the natural as we speak lol
💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯.. I was & have always been RODE HARD & HUNG UP WET... right in my own household.. From a small girl til now.. Folk get so mad at my AUDACITY.. to not let them BREAK ME.. TOXIC, TOXIC, TOXIC... REMEMBER.. T☠XIC= POISON POISON KILLS... EVEN IF WE DON'T DIE.. The SIDE EFFECTS of TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS- KILL OUR SPIRIT & BREAK &/or BREAKDOWN OUR SOUL... PROTECT Y♀️UR ENERGY 🌌💫 ✨ AT TIMES... NOBODY ELSE CAN DO IT FOR YOU..
In many ways! My mother and female counselor at high school said I was too smart to go to college. It was years ago when being a secretary was still the great push to women! Moslty counseler threw me away because we were poor and my parents didnt know to ask about scholarships. But I had 2nd higest GPA and tested 3.5 years into college in 10th grade in a special literacy test my state of California did. I was invisible.I was sat on in high school like the girl in Princess Diaries. Also had wavy frizzy hair and bright red head. Not the norm or twigging look while commercials about hair dye were saying "blondes have more fun"! gee just typing this I get mad all over. I was raised shy, stayed shy, always worked miniumum wage, given other peoples work... but did not raise my kids to not have confidence in who they are. Ahead of the game in jobs now! I came into my own older. Ive sewn since 5 and yep resemble Lucy in looks and atttude. I seem like a goof at times but its because I view the world in simple terms even though Im not. I now sell my upcycle products at tiny farmers market we have. Jean bags. Aprons from men's shirts. Lots more.
She’s Gorgeous and I hope she knows not to care what other people think your mom and your sister they’re just jealous. She’s beautiful inside and out. ❤
Please don’t ever judge black women for wearing wigs and weaves. Unfortunately some were taught that wearing their natural hair was bad or wrong. We get so much judgement for being insecure but people don’t realize a lot of our insecurities start at home.
So much pressure on me to get my mixed daughter's hair straightened. My mother-in-law taking her to get that done without my knowledge or permission. The constant hate against natural, normal hair.
She's a natural beauty. Her mother and sister need to apologise for the name calling. They've traumatised her to the point of making her reject the *curly hair that grows out of her scalp*
This young lady is a natural, stunningly beautiful sister. People who have experienced this, like myself, found rare gems that looked beyond my low self esteem and made me see my heart and look in the mirror and See Me... For Myself. Not for how people were constantly casting there opinions on how 'They thought' I should look. I had to realize that my beauty is inward and outward... and their words made them FEEL better. Kind of like what Cinderella went through. I am grateful for those Angels that were sent to me.
That’s why I tell my daughter everyday , your hair is gorgeous, your hair is beautiful..this lady is beautiful..I’m just glad women are starting to wear they hair natural..it’s soo beautiful ❤
We as black people grow up thinking that if our hair is not silky shiny curly or long and straight, then we are ugly. And it doesn’t help when we don’t even know what to do with it.
I don't understand it.... I always thought black hair was very beautiful. You can't even replicate it. This just makes me really sad... when someone can't see something wonderful that they have. Because they've been lied to too much. It's not fair.
U ladies go through more then I ever realized with ur hair. I see it now on you tube and I’m blown away. I couldn’t do that all the time, no way! I hate that ur told that ur hair isn’t beautiful. Why? There’s a lot that can be done with natural black hair. I hate that any little girl is told that her hair is ugly.
We grow up thinking that because we tell ourselves that. My husband tells me he likes my natural hair and I can tell he does but like she said, it’s my own family and friends (black) that call me out for natural hair. It’s a shame.
This story is all too common with different characters causing the hurt in our community. For me, it was my father. My grandmother is biracial so her and my aunt have the “3 a/b good hair”. I was blessed with type 4 hair. My hair just wasn’t like that and he had no issues letting me know. Thankfully I had supportive friends and family to reaffirm that my hair was/is beautiful.
I am so sorry you had to experience that for your own family members. it is a trauma in the black community that many of us have still not healed from. I have 3 girls. All 3 have completely different textures 2b, 3B and 4C....same mother and father. However, I made certain that each of my girls knew how uniquely beautiful their hair is....without chemicals. unfortunately many of us are still so addicted to these styles that do not keep our hair healthy and are quick but harmful solutions.....KNOW that all Black hair is BEAUTIFUL.
I'm so sorry you felt the way that you did . and this woman in the video is gawgus I can only imagine how good she would look if she had embraced her natural hair . Its hard understand like I see you haven't you seen you in the mirror ? so damn pretty . my mum used to sing the pork log song when I entered a room I don't think she realised how much it affected me . my skin is lije sagging now from how small I got n I feel quite ugly too . if I gain any weight my man of 20 yrs calls me fat he still does now n I weigh 45kg hoping closer to 50 atm
Sista you are so very pretty , I think you look better after the removal of the wig for real. Celebrate your prettiness honey! We were forced to were straight hair over our kinky coily hair to fit into a society who never excepted us. We must REturn back to our natural state. If you want to straighten hair do it with a flat iron or straightening comb like we did before the pressures of society .
Yes. Some families who are like that need Jesus I have one of those but God has kept me strong that I above and not beneath. It does not matter what they say you don’t own any one anything. It was said in child hood so that is hard and it transpired into adulthood think you are not pretty if you do not wear your natural hair out.
I am a 42 year-old white male, as I sit here and watch this video while I am sitting in my truck in my driveway. This makes me sad hearing that her mom and her sister would tell her that. This poor young lady now has a complex about herself. She is a beautiful person and no one should have ever told her that. She is beautiful!
Years ago , I went to many job interviews with natural hair , natural black woman didn't get a job until the day I wore a wig and put on some make up I got a job . This world is really nasty.
@@MarieN8959 Although , you are validated to your feelings in which you consider is the truth , sometimes it doesn’t make it the truth . I , a black women have never wore a wig and got very great positions with my natural hair and no makeup . Your perception becomes your own reality. Your hair may have not prevented you from getting the job , but maybe their were other people best suited for that position in that moment . Black hair is only an issue in society if you lack the confidence while embracing it . I had great parents that would tell me everyday as I child that my hair was beautiful and it made me feel unique while going to predominantly white schools . One time I cried when I got teased by a kid for having curly/kinky hair and went home and told my mom I wanted to wear to straighten it . She told me No , because I wanted to straighten it for the wrong reasons referring to , getting teased because my hair was different . That built so much confidence in me and I was aware that my hair is who I am and why should I change what I was born with to fit in with society beauty standards . What this lady parents did to her is the complete opposite of what my parents did and that’s why feels ugly . 😢 Continue to wear your natural hair , love yourself , because our hair is beautiful 😊
The worst thing is for the people who are supposed to love you unconditionally make you feel unworthy of love. My family have always been the main ones to make fun of my hair, my weight, clothes, etc. I had to learn to love myself despite them. I am still working on completely loving all of me, but I know that I have to love me before I expect it from everyone else. ❤
This all spills over from how black people were treat for the color of their skin and hair texture. We were made and still are to a certain degree that our black isn't beautiful, our natural hair is not good enough. So over the years we allow others to dictate what was beautiful. I learned to embrace My natural beauty.
@@sonjiewilson Let this person speak in the topic of the video. We know that it can be any woman that go through this or but this is specifically an issue in the black community. Why do y’all do this? They were speaking about a black woman not all women in the moment cut that shit out
Family will help you jack your mind up faster than strangers! And most of the time, they are coming from a place of their own pain and discomfort and they aren't even aware of it. Sis, you are Gorgeous and BELOVED OF THE MOST HIGH, YWH!! 🙌🏽🙌🏽🥰🥰🥰
I can relate about how a mother can say and do things that affect our self esteem ..😞.. May God bless you.. Having natural hair is a gift❤😇🙏🏽.. You are not ugly at all‼️‼️‼️😇❤️🙏🏽
This hits home. My mom was Afro Caribbean. She grew up with relaxers and roller sets and hot combs and flat irons and blow outs. I don’t even remember growing up seeing my moms hair natural cuz even a centimeter of natural growth they would panic and go relax it again. It was toxic. As I grew older I challenged my mom to go natural. During her process our family ridiculed, criticized, complained, belittled, and full blown insulted her saying her husband (my dad) was gonna look for another woman because of her natural hair. She was fully natural and looked beautiful! Everyone else loved her hair including my dad. I’m just happy that the last few years of my moms life i was able to show her that loving her hair and her beautiful black skin was ok ♥️. She felt beautiful! Love you and miss you mom ♥️!
That's so sweet. What stands out to me is that you said everyone else loved her hair. I'm sure they did, sometimes your biggest haters are related to you.
Your amazing. Thanks for showing your mother her real true beauty and making her realize how beautiful she was just as she was. Thats a huge gift you gave her.
So true. Afro Caribbeans are like that. I went naturally 2 years ago and did the big chop. I got the same reactions. However, I was ready for it all because I have truly accepted that I am a beautiful, blessed black queen. 😅
There’s nothing like a queen in general she’s gorgeous but not cuz of her curly hair or skin color ❤️ her heart and stunning features alone warm my heart
Everyone is beautiful. However, being black plays a significant role. We can't just wear our natural hair and be considered beautiful, whereas white (women) can just wear a messy bun and be considered beautiful. We go through a lot with our natural hair, and it should not be invalidated because it is associated with white. It is good to love yourself and be natural, but in this world, black women and men cannot do so freely or freely care for themselves due to systemic oppression and racism. Don't justify it by saying it doesn't matter whether you're black or white because being black or white has a HUGE impact on oneself.
@Eden Adonis I'm here to let you know that I do and literally always have found black women's natural hair beautiful and most people I have talked with feel the same way. I'm not to here to say you're wrong, in here to say you're beautiful and let that hair down ❤❤❤❤❤
@@Edenadonis same. i'm a 16 yo black girl and i wonder if people even know how many times i've cried over my hair. it's my worst nightmare to have to go to school with my natural hard-to-manage curly ass hair in a bun. i feel so ugly and out of place. it's hard. i have to wake up earlier than i usually do so that i might have time to get my hair to work in the way that i'd like it to and to get it to be, at the very least, decent. everytime i look at people with long, untangly beautiful hair that just perfectly whisps into a claw clip, i just fucking wish it was me. show me a clip of any white/ asian/ mixed girl and i'd just be staring at her hair ,heh, and envying how easy it must be to; •wake up, •shower with your hair getting wet, •being able to go swimming however/ whenever, •couple brushes in the morning and hop off to school, •to look amazing ,as you said, "in a messy bun". damn. sorry for the rant. but after all i do find a few pro's to the black girl life. •we were all wonderfully and beautifully created by God in His image meaning that we are perfect. •braids are divine expressions of hair beauty and i love how they look •people ,for whatever reason, love to touch and play with my curly hair. creepy but very comforting and complimenting. 😅
I’ve never understood family members especially women tearing each other down like that! She’s so beautiful, it makes me so sad she carries that insecurity with her.
A lot of them care too much about what other people say so they pass that on to their children and family members. Sad. I was not raised that way at all. I was told I was pretty by my mama and daddy, my sister and brother, and grandmama that I never had to believe what anyone else said about me. I didn’t always think that I was but I loved that my family told me that. It made me never look to others to validate my looks.
This I do not know why anybody unless they were blind would ever call you ugly! Being blind or just being jealous because you are drop-dead gorgeous beautiful
People always made fun of my curly hair aswell. Not to the point I had to buy a wig because I'm white, but always had it in a ponytail until I decided to cut it off. Feels terrible because our hair is beautiful as it is and all that's needed it's a nice advice on taking care of our hair so it shines beautifully!
My family used to act like that sis. YOU ARE GORGEOUS!!! I had to remind them that I was BORN with curls and I'll die with it. It's a terrible mindset that the black community still need to work on (not just influencers). I was ecstatic when people started to go back natural INCLUDING my family ❤️ STAY STRONG and don't let societies "definition" of beauty try to define your natural beauty! 😘
@@renarich4942 well if they tap it and they don't want to wrap it (because "birth control should protect them") then they're SOL LOL. But seriously, 🤷🏾♀️ everyone has a preference, we just have to respect it.
I have a bit of a thing for curly, African hair is so beautiful. I would have loved to see Bonnie in TVD have her natural hair but i guess that didnt like that idea🤔
As a black female I can confirm that black people, especially black family members can be toxic when it comes to our natural beauty. When I was a kid my aunt told me I would look prettier if I relaxed my hair. Honestly those words affected me mentally and made me insecure growing up. Good thing little me stayed strong and instead of following my aunts advice I took pride in my hair and started to take better care of it. Now my hair is flourishing and I get a ton of compliments and questions on how I maintain it. We are beautiful, we just need to realize it
So I'm white, and this honestly made me cry. Growing up, every close friend I had was black or mixed. I know from watching my close girl friends growing up the pain that some of them felt not feeling "pretty" because of their hair. Your natural beauty is more than enough! I wish I could scream that to anyone feeling like it isn't. You don't need a wig! Your hair is just as beautiful as any other girl's hair. ❤ Every time I see a young girl of color I ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS compliment her and tell her I LOVE her hair or her eyes! I do it in memory of watching my dark skin friends struggle with their beauty. I hope every time I compliment these girls it's a memory they'll never forget.
White people do the same thing to their kids too; when i was at university, I had a couple of White friends who were anorexic because their mother's did the same thing to them, always commenting about their weight, and telling them don't eat too much, fat girl's are not pretty girl's" , " fat girl's always come last" and nobody likes a fat girl..." we'd go out for lunch and i could tell that they were hungry, but they would never eat because they didn't want to "Get big as a whale..." Even though they were size's zero to five. We would have study groups and you could literally hear their stomach's growling and their breaths smelled horrible. I felt sorry for them , the low self esteem & always second guessing themselves. We'd go to parties and no matter what they wore they hated how it looked on them no matter how much i and the other girl's assured them that they looked awesome. They really struggled with their beauty too. Sometimes a mother can be a girl's biggest bully. Smdh......
I hope she 100% knows she is not the toxic one, or ugly. So much pain, some parents don't realize how long the things they say stays with their children.
I agree I'm self going through something where my family is concerned ... They don't know how they damage you inside and it's coming from your own family it's sad
It's sad when strangers bully you, but it's a whole different thing when your own family can't accept you as is. I hope she realizes that she is truly beautiful
People don't realize their words may not mean anything to them but to you they sure cut deep. My sisters and cousins constantly called me stupid and ugly (common sibling names) but for a long time I was getting basically called worthless years out of high school. While we still talk, I don't think we'll ever be close. Girl, I feel you and you're more beautiful then you think and don't let anyone bring you down!!
Alot of black mothers damage you by saying nasty things to keep you from going natural. You just have to be strong 💪🏾 to get through it. They will come around once they see you with strong long beautiful hair or a head full of hair instead of weakened hair that falls out with over processed hair or braid extensions with no edges and wigs that itch. Be strong 💪🏾 to handle it. You have a goal to be your natural God given self. And he didn't make no mistakes on you!😊
That "you need to DO your hair" mentality is what made a lot of us turn to relaxers at young ages. Your hair doesn't have to be flat to your head for it to be considered styled and beautiful ❤
Natural hair is the most beautiful because it is yours. Own your self-worth and know that those who try to put you down are the little people. You are blessed.
You mean like when you don’t do anything to it or your mean coily hair because if you mean coily, that’s not nice every hair is beautiful no hair outshines the other straight hair beautiful too
Some cultures believe hair holds so much personal power in our lives and we don’t even realize it. Which is why some cultures rarely cut /mess with their hair and also why a lot of people for for haircuts when they go through a significant emotional change. Like a makeover, except you’re rewriting your path moving forward
Кино
She is not ugly at all, I hope she realizes it.
No kidding, she has lovely features
This is so honest I love that we’re breaking down the reality of wigs and weaves in the black community. If it was all about length or low maintenance, ppl would be wearing 70s Afros and wigs that actually proudly match black hair.
Your own can tear you down the worst and have you feeling bad about your self or your hair I have been there
They is nothing ugly about this lady.
@@holycow1697 Exactly.🎯 It started with her very ignorant mother and grandmother brainwashing her that her natural hair was ugly. There are many of them out here like that even still today. I knew a woman that was always criticizing her daughter on her afro which was so cute. A lot will tolerate braids, but just don't have it free and loose because they lose it then. Their minds are still in shackles. SMH.😚
Sometimes family can make you feel insecure because you trust them the most.
Agree...Family, friends always have something to say...they need to go an look at themselves. 😒
Family can be mean I know I'm living it now
Yessss, that is where all those insecurities come from family.. I'm a twin, and I was considered the fat one because, I had a butt.. and my twin was slim and taller, but the thing is, I wasn't fat just shorter with a shape.. It kind of scarred me.. Still to this day, people in my family say that.. But I'm 51 and still look fabulous..
@Stephanie Cobb Sometimes, your blood is your worst enemy. I will be 50 this year. I look better than most women my age. If you saw me walking down the street, you would never know what I been through or have children and grandchildren. We are Blessed by the best 👌 👍🏼 😍
Yes. They projected their insecurities probably thinking they were helping her but they were wrong.
She is absolutely gorgeous just the way God made her! I pray she realizes this and is able to heal the emotional damage done to her
May the Lord bless you for that comment. sure right.
American media made her think str8 hair is pretty smh my girls love their natural hair and never want to look like pale face girl's
She's average looking not ugly. Stop calling everyone gorgeous in an attempt to be nice. Its fake so stop.
@@Vale10952 beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Who are you to tell me what I see? Also, why did you feel the need to project your ugly personality onto me? I wish you the best and hopefully you can rise above the negativity that is clearly rotting your soul
@barbaraplaisance2515 Okay, so next time, don't make public comments and feel entitled to others' opinions.
You lie related to bw looks just like most people online.
The DIMPLES, THE MELANIN, SHE'S JUST BEAUTIFUL ❤
No woman should be told by her mom and sister anything negative about wearing her hair natural. She’s so beautiful!!
she was never told anything negative tho there just said why are you wearing your hair like that she probably just wasnt taking good care of her hair
@@latoyaroy8516 based off her comment an lookin at her hair I doubt wha u said is accurate. No matter how unkempt they felt it was they should've just supported her.. bt based off how she said it I believe they made her fell less than attractive for not havin the permed or silky white girl look
My mom said something similar to me as a preteen and at 51 it still bothers me.
Words can be hurtful (even years afterward)
Wonder how beautifully her mom and sister looked for them to say that. Smh
This is sad. SHE IS GORGEOUS.
First off we are the only people on earth who attack our own children and make them have low self esteem...and then when they grow up to hate themselves we say 'what is wrong with her!' It's a sick,sick cycle and what's even sadder is her own mother whom suppose to love,support and boost her self esteem up was riping her to shreds!!!! The black community is screwed up...sis you are beautiful.
A man made her feel like this. Probably chose someone with European standards of beauty.
@@thesofiacode6336 she literally said her mom and sister made her feel that way.
@@nikk5002 How much do you wanna bet it wasn’t just her mom and her sister?
@@themonsterwithin4000 why do you insist it’s a man?
We as moms, especially to girls, have the MOST responsibility to bring our daughters up with high self esteem and loving themselves. I make it a point every single day to tell my daughters something I love about them, how smart they are, how beautiful they are, how incredible their hair looks today, etc. The amount of women I hear these days that had moms tear them down like this is devastating and continuing the cycle.
I love that!!! I commend you for that I so wished I had that. Family would always say something negative about my natural hair so it always felt like a problem that needed to be fixed. I wore my afro out today for a funeral and felt so insecure that I didn’t even take pictures. However, for the past 3 years now I have been embracing my natural hair, learning how beautiful it is, and how to take care of it. It’s still a process. God bless!!🙏🏾❤️
@@ndiacarter450 I'm so sorry you had family that tore you down like that. I keep hearing stories like that (and can relate) and I can't imagine hurting my child like that. All it takes is ONE negative comment to give a lifetime of insecurity and that's devastating.
I bet your hair looked incredible at the funeral and I'm so sad society has made women (and men) with curly hair feel bad about it, yet some also put archaic policies in place about no braids, dreads, etc. Like what the heck are you supposed to do then if it's all looked at badly?! I'm so glad natural hair and afros are becoming more embraced. Wear your hair with pride babe, I bet you looked amazing! 🤍
😢 A lot of us dealt with this. Praying for strength to love yourself.
Yes I know I sure did from my peers in my Neighborhood being call Black and Ugly 😢 from my own Race!
that’s so disgusting, esp since it was women closest to her, so obviously she would believe them. this is so sad
This happens often to A LOT of people. Even me…not necessarily about my hair but towards my body.
My mom died when I was 11 so the only women who I had near were aunts and grandma, they as a full adult women told me several times I was ugly I could be fat all my life and no one would love me because who I am. Thought always they were telling the truth and I develop ED, still feel ugly and repeat alwys to myself those were lies and stupidity from them. The women near women are not always kind with their words.
@@Nunyabiz17 I understand how you feel because my father would do that to me, that really destroyed me. I didn’t like to socialize and sometimes I thought I am not worthy of being loved because I was ugly. I hated dressing up because I was overweight and everyone around me made it a big deal. Now I’m confident and don’t care what others say about me. As a grew older I realized that if I was going to live by what others say then I would never be happy.
@@burbuvs8911I’m sorry you had to go through that 😪🙏🏿
@@burbuvs8911 I’m glad now you know those are lies, stupidity and jealous. They must have narcissistic personality disorders or other personality disorders. I hope you are away from them and safe
Mothers stop bullying your daughters, it's almost always something superficial and when it's not, it's even worse.
It's a behavior that's handed down from generation to generation! If we keep putting our people down, we'll never get up!!!
Yeah I have curly hair and I would leave it in a ponytail and she would be like why you wearing your hair like that do something but I absolutely feel her pain
@@tammygaines3455 So right👌🏻💯
@@finealfor275 It's sad, really sad that we can't enjoy how we look and we can't help our children feel good about themselves either, if I wanted to have children I would try to avoid repeat that pattern of behavior
I’m light skin and my cousin is dark skin, my mama would buy me both white and black dolls, my cousin threw her black doll away because of the colorism that goes on in the blk community. I hated it, I would defend her all the time from our own people. Ugh 😫
I feel her pain. Family will tear you down because in reality you are beautiful and they don’t want you to see it. This made me sad for her cause I’ve been there.
I feel this. My older brother would do the same to me. I felt so embarrassed I didn’t even wanna leave the house at one point. I’m still working through those issues 😢
Best wishes to you. I cut my hair and let it grow evenly and use moringa oil and it is healthy and I receive it as healthy and beautiful.
I swear anyone’s first bully is their family/friends during childhood. That shit defines you
Lord, you told the absolute truth
Girl i can attest to that; a whole testimony.😓 I'm a 25 yrs old woman now and it still affect me.
Some Parents kill their children’s spirits. This woman is beautiful and it’s sad she still carry’s the scars of what her mother said to her about her hair.
I went through this with my mom she use to tell me she was get my plastic surgery when I get older but honestly I always knew it wasn’t malicious or malcontent it was because of the way she raised and I think she thought she was helping me but never understood this something I have to live with so telling me I should change is not helping it’s teaching not to love my self for who I am and I did have that mindest at first I hated my nose but I grew into it and love myself more than I thought I ever would
@@kachirisuarez7812I am so sorry you had to go thru that 💔 hope ur ok and family aren't always the nicest in some cases 😊
My family is horrible to me and my mom makes fun of me for being too emotional about it
@@prettylittlething9935 You’re a beautiful young lady, I’m sorry your family does that to you. It’s unfortunate we can’t choose our family. Surround yourself around people who celebrate you not tolerate you. Take care of you darling♥️
@@justjoanneofficial thank you yes I understood my mom was only projecting what she was taught and unfortunately my family wasn’t nice to my mom either but she never said in a mean way always as a joke but I don’t think she knew how much it hurt me that my own mom wanted me to change how I look but yes I took a lot of self love and learning on my own but I know better now and have kids of my own so I definitely breaking the cycle ❤️
This broke my heart. 😢 She is so beautiful inside and out.
Sis literally looked so amazing after she pulled her wig off!!
This lady is actually quite beautiful. It’s a shame that people that she cares about made her feel less than that.
Listen to your response. It's ridiculously biased.
Just say she's beautiful. "Actually" is as if she barely made your opinionated cut. This is a sensitive subject and being raised in the era of relaxers and 4 sisters, this hits home.
My dear lady...you are beautiful, just the way you are. Your natural hair is gorgeous...no need to hide it....please, go out with your natural hair...it's all good!!❤
Lol what do you think biased means? Bless your heart…
I know words are hard, and some people lack the ability to understand context so I guess I’ll help. The context of the video was that she had to wear so much product and still was made to feel inferior. When in fact, she was more attractive than many people without a stitch of make up on. Soooo, the word “actually” had nothing to do with the idea you’re trying to insinuate A&A… cool join account.
NO WOMAN should have to wear a wig at all times in order to feel pretty. This woman is beautiful.
Truth!! But a lot of people in the black community has made fun of a lot of young black girls with natural hair. Work places have called natural hair unprofessional. Some boarding schools and day schools have made little black girls feel that their hair isn't beautiful or professional and need to be tamed. With constant bashing from society and their own home, one starts to believe that as a reality until they truly accept themselves and appreciate themselves.
E.G. my natural was made fun of so many times, I was made to relax my hair because they said it was unkempt. I grew out of the feeling like wearing a wig to fit societal norms. Now I feel like F societal norms and F people & their opinions. I got locs and walk like the streets are my runway. My life, I make the final say. Someone has a problem with it then or well, too bad for them for being nosy.
The black community talks about the world accepting us as we are but we are the first to clown a person who chooses to keep their natural hair that naturally grows out of our heads!!! Isn't it weird that we even need a natural hair movement? God blessed us to be able to hold various styles but the slave mentality has not left people's mind and that is unfortunate
@@pennyck9468 that'd so true once I went to my jamaican nas house and she was like go and come your hair because I had a afro and I was like why she said because its messy... I really don't show emotions like that but I'm sure if a black girl heard that they would be upset but it's mainly because of racism and how in the old days black people had to have there hair in a straight haired person style not mentioning race👀
@@pennyck9468
mhm
@@pennyck9468 like for sure, isn't it weird that WE even need a natural hair movement !!?😢
My five year old daughter told me that she liked my weave style but enjoyed my REAL hair better. That is 9 years ago now. I have not touched a weave since.
My goodness, you are SO NATURALLY BEAUTIFUL
You are a Beautiful woman. Don't ever let anyone say you are not! People who say you are ugly..they are ugly inside Feel your power and never forget you ARE Beautiful!.
When she said her mom and sister ridiculed her--it made me tear up. That's so heartbreaking to hear. I hope she can sit with that pain and hurt and find solace in her natural beauty. She is truly beautiful ❤️
Truly 🤎🌻
It be your own family sometimes. 😢
My mom and siblings did the same. No one hates black people more than black people! Especially the women!!!! It's way different nowadays but a few years ago?! WHEW the self hate was beyond real. They'll gaslight you into believing that they were wigs for 'protection' (which many black women do) but MOST do not! Most literally dont know how to even do their NATURAL hair or even how to wear it out
Looking at her beautiful face say “I feel ugly” because of a wig and the people who didn’t allow her to embrace her natural hair is WILDDDD . You’re beyond beautiful sis ❤️❤️❤️
those "people" were her own family, her mom and sister, not random strangers.
Your beautiful in your own way your God creation ❤️in your own way
@@melodiechartier5173 even worse then.
You’re gorgeous Queen ❤❤❤
You’re just as pretty without the wig as you are with it! You’re beautiful!!
She looks so beautiful. It is incredibly sad to think that she felt ugly because of other people bullying her into changing her appearance. I hope she sees herself for the gorgeous individual she truly is.
Her own family at that!
That is so sad. Self acceptance is the first act of love. Get you some
Yeaa especially with her dimples!
A lot of people don’t care about what anybody thinks, but when it’s their family, they totally care 😢
It's not just other people, which wouldn't affect someone as much, but it's her family saying it. You make it sound like it was a bunch of strangers saying it.
They were jealous boo. Sometimes we ignore the shade from family bc you say to yourself "no way, what could they possibly envy about me?" But they envied your confidence and the fact that you loved yourself.
My mother and grandmothers used to do the same thing to me. I don't believe it was so much of envy as it was a mindset based in the conditioning of Eurocentric standards of beauty and what's considered presentable and attractive that's been engrained in us for centuries.
@@lakiiamccall3051 this too
This too
That is so true, u you looked good and they didn't like it. love your hair as your best friend.
I agree. They must have been the ones without edges. Even parents and siblings can throw skates.. Sad but true.
It's so sad... I wish I had beautiful hair like black women have...and if I was a black woman....I would were my natural hair...
Sis, I can name so many things about you that are beautiful...your face, specifically your eyebrows, eyes, nose, and omg, your teeth are amazing. On the inside, based on your responses and comments, you seem calm and reasonable. To me, that's a genuine and kind person. You're a beautiful black woman. Own it.
She’s so beautiful naturally and with her makeup on too!! They were just jealous af smh 🤦🏽♀️ if you’re reading this, YOU ARE BEAUTIFULLLL!! Don’t let ppl who don’t love themselves ever make you hate yourself, KEEP SHINING AND THRIVING AND TAKING CARE OF YOURSELF! ♥️♥️♥️
Man this is so true in black families! They'll say "you gon do something with yo head?" And you did a twist out. Lol smdh
it's common in families of all colors. Not arguing or diminishing anyone else experience i'm just speaking from my own.
@@Lost_souls_lose_freedom bro stfu. This is about the experience in black families in particular.
@@Lost_souls_lose_freedom Other races don't have the same hair as black people hence why the experiences are different and come with different challenges.
@KD W you should have made your own comment then cos if you write this under such a comment, it is an argument and does diminish her experience.
@@Lost_souls_lose_freedom ? All races have afro hair since when? 🧐 Don't "all lives matter" this post!
She actually looks better with her hair than the wig that almost damaged her hair
No just no
I absolutely agree 😊
@@Cnzxco grow up
@@Cnzxco WELL YOU! KEEP YOUR WEAVE! HIDE ALL YOU WANT! YOUR CURLY HAIR IS NOT GOING TO GO AWAY! IT'S STILL UNDERNEATH! THAT SHIT! ON TOP YOUR HEAD!😏
@@Eunoiaac that’s what he should be telling you you can say encouraging words but don’t lie
😢😢 i totally relate. I'm over 30 years old and i went to visit my mom a while back wearing my natural hair (we live in different cities) and she asked the same questions.."are u going to do something with your hair? ..." And i explained to her that I've embraced my natural texture i love wearing my curly hair....
She went out to the store for groceries.. when she came back she put a box perm on the bed and said "here this is for you".....
I cannot verbalize how deeply hurtful that was and still is for me. It took me back to being the little girl whose long beautiful hair she burned off with relaxers for years.. it still makes me tear up. Had it been anyone else i don't think it would've been so bad.
She looks stunning either way and i hope she can realize that 🤍🤍🤍
That broke my heart. You are not ugly, you are a beautiful Queen. Own that! Don't let anyone shame you.
Where is she ugly?
Black women love a chance to tear you down. I’ve experienced this throughout my life.
@@nieceypiecey100 how did you overcome it?
🗣YOU ARE NOT UGLY!👎🗣 YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL AND WONDERFULLY MADE 💕🧍♀️❤🗣 BY GOD! 🌌🌏❤🗣A MEN! 🧎♀️❤🔥👍🩸🌏🧎♀️
Especially your own family. That is so sad.
As a hairstylist it's a fact that most non African Americans think your natural, un-relaxed hair is gorgeous.. Just understand that we live in a jealous world that tries to break down everything it envies 😔
This is actually exactly what I was thinking. I could be completely wrong- but I've noticed that the people bullying African Americans the most about their hair seems to be their own family members/eachother. Like they project their own insecurities on others should they dare have the confidence to wear their natural hair. I've always thought it was beautiful. God doesn't make mistakes. He gave everyone the hair they were born with because it's beautiful!!!!
It's fascinating. Ppl wanna touch it and feel it. I don't like people's nasty hands in my hair😮
@@elizabethbryant2958 That's a whole different thing, lol! It's rude as hell to do that to anyone without asking. Even if they do ask, I don't think I would be able to help feeling like a zoo animal. Unless it's a kid
@@bl0pez772 it also doesn’t help that it was ingrained in our parents head too that our natural hair is messy, unprofessional and not ideal. It’s generational trauma
WELL SAID❣️🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾
She’s pretty in her own way ❤
“I’m gonna leave this hanging here for a min”😭😭😭
Yep!!! Older black women absolutely HATE!!! To see the younger black women embracing their hair. Even the church ladies said “ need to do something with my hair” when I first loc’d my hair I was called ugly… now the same people love my hair 4 years later 🙏🏾💕 just hold on don’t ever fold on what God gives you
I am sorry that happened to you. Many of us at the church I attend don’t wear make or worry that our hair is pressed to societies perspective standard of beautiful. We’re all beautiful and embrace one another.
My Christian nan just couldn't get over my natural hair. Each time I'd see her , it's 'when you doing your hair' . After a while , I realised what she was doing , I just asked , do you believe in God? Well God made me like this , who am I to say it's wrong. She stopped after that.
Yep
This is facts. My grandmother hates my aunt's natural hair. Me on the other hand wear weaves and my grandmother always complement me. She's gonna be shocked next time she see me cause I'm rocking the natural as we speak lol
YASS
God made and crafted every detail of your existence. It's time we embrace our natural features
You slay with that curly hair girlie ✌️
Your natural hair is beautiful. It is a part of you.
Just bc it’s part of you don’t make it beautiful 😂 that’s why wigs are so popular hoes know when they bald headed
just cus it natural dont mean it good dat shit look like my nut hair
Yea but society don’t see it that way
@@RobertBrown-qc9zxWe are part of society and we don't see it that way...
@@OLAOnlyLegendzAllowed exactly, it’s even in the military and other organizations under grooming and hair standards
She’s gorgeous with her natural hair, stunning ❤
She's gorgeous! I prayed she realize that 🙏🏿
It's the family members that are the closest to you that teaches you how to be insecure...
💯 right. We have to be careful.
Yes indeed REALTALK
💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯..
I was & have always been RODE HARD & HUNG UP WET... right in my own household..
From a small girl til now..
Folk get so mad at my AUDACITY.. to not let them BREAK ME..
TOXIC, TOXIC, TOXIC...
REMEMBER..
T☠XIC= POISON
POISON KILLS... EVEN IF WE DON'T DIE..
The SIDE EFFECTS of TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS-
KILL OUR SPIRIT & BREAK &/or BREAKDOWN OUR SOUL...
PROTECT Y♀️UR ENERGY
🌌💫 ✨ AT TIMES... NOBODY ELSE CAN DO IT FOR YOU..
In many ways! My mother and female counselor at high school said I was too smart to go to college. It was years ago when being a secretary was still the great push to women! Moslty counseler threw me away because we were poor and my parents didnt know to ask about scholarships. But I had 2nd higest GPA and tested 3.5 years into college in 10th grade in a special literacy test my state of California did. I was invisible.I was sat on in high school like the girl in Princess Diaries. Also had wavy frizzy hair and bright red head. Not the norm or twigging look while commercials about hair dye were saying "blondes have more fun"! gee just typing this I get mad all over. I was raised shy, stayed shy, always worked miniumum wage, given other peoples work... but did not raise my kids to not have confidence in who they are. Ahead of the game in jobs now! I came into my own older. Ive sewn since 5 and yep resemble Lucy in looks and atttude. I seem like a goof at times but its because I view the world in simple terms even though Im not. I now sell my upcycle products at tiny farmers market we have. Jean bags. Aprons from men's shirts. Lots more.
So much true
Real talk. Be careful what you tell your kids and how you project your insecurities and realities on them. They are not you. Support kids always.
especially with stuff they can’t change… telling your black child not to wear their natural hair can do so much harm
Realities? Huh? There’s only ONE reality hunny lol
@trevormichael4906 if you can't comprehend just say that.
Unlisted they are confused about gender
Absolutely true ❤❤
She’s Gorgeous and I hope she knows not to care what other people think your mom and your sister they’re just jealous. She’s beautiful inside and out. ❤
your natural beauty is stunning never let anyone have that much power over you ❤
Please don’t ever judge black women for wearing wigs and weaves. Unfortunately some were taught that wearing their natural hair was bad or wrong. We get so much judgement for being insecure but people don’t realize a lot of our insecurities start at home.
This.
That's so flipping sad tho. Natural hair is so beautiful.
So much pressure on me to get my mixed daughter's hair straightened.
My mother-in-law taking her to get that done without my knowledge or permission.
The constant hate against natural, normal hair.
@@nicevers Mixed people often have some of the prettiest hair natural hair around.
Best comment!
This is a beautiful woman. Who's carrying pain and has self-image problems. I sincerely hope she's a happier person by now.
@Dilshad maybe it looks off because she has tried to hide it for who knows how many years
@Dilshad its not
@Dilshad but she isn’t ugly
@Dilshad you’re just saying that bc it’s short, but if it were a man to have that hair it’s not bad.
Also ur probably a white anyway 💀💀
You are gorgeous with your natural hair !!
BLACK NATURAL hair is ABSOLUTELY STUNNING UNIQUE FLAWLESS & BEAUTIFUL❤🖤❤Be PROUD God BLESSED you with it.
She's a natural beauty. Her mother and sister need to apologise for the name calling. They've traumatised her to the point of making her reject the *curly hair that grows out of her scalp*
That was their purpose for doing it.
Sad
💯 it’s a shame her own fam tore her down❤❤❤
She so beautiful the really her beautiful skin and features look at her hair😊love your self fallow know one low selfastim
She's definitely not ugly, she's beautiful. I'm sorry they made her feel that way!
I was expecting to see a mess when he removed her wig….I was like oh. Wait? What’s ugly? I hate that she sees herself like that.
@@angelmercy5261 exactly.and those.cornrow on fleek under that.wid
@@angelmercy5261 I know right... shame on them for making her feel bad..😢
This young lady is a natural, stunningly beautiful sister. People who have experienced this, like myself, found rare gems that looked beyond my low self esteem and made me see my heart and look in the mirror and See Me... For Myself. Not for how people were constantly casting there opinions on how 'They thought' I should look. I had to realize that my beauty is inward and outward... and their words made them FEEL better. Kind of like what Cinderella went through.
I am grateful for those Angels that were sent to me.
That’s why I tell my daughter everyday , your hair is gorgeous, your hair is beautiful..this lady is beautiful..I’m just glad women are starting to wear they hair natural..it’s soo beautiful ❤
We as black people grow up thinking that if our hair is not silky shiny curly or long and straight, then we are ugly. And it doesn’t help when we don’t even know what to do with it.
I don't understand it.... I always thought black hair was very beautiful. You can't even replicate it.
This just makes me really sad... when someone can't see something wonderful that they have. Because they've been lied to too much.
It's not fair.
Internalized racism is so sad. I hope you’ve come to find yourself beautiful, because curly hair is so beautiful! :)
U ladies go through more then I ever realized with ur hair. I see it now on you tube and I’m blown away. I couldn’t do that all the time, no way! I hate that ur told that ur hair isn’t beautiful. Why? There’s a lot that can be done with natural black hair. I hate that any little girl is told that her hair is ugly.
We grow up thinking that because we tell ourselves that. My husband tells me he likes my natural hair and I can tell he does but like she said, it’s my own family and friends (black) that call me out for natural hair. It’s a shame.
Not me🙌🏽🙏🏽
That hurts my heart, parents are supposed to uplift their children not tear them down. She is so beautiful! ❤️
She is so beautiful with her natural hair it makes me sad to see her cry I'm sorry you experienced this
My family teased me about my hair now they rock that natural with pride!😊
Bro ain’t no way boy. She was prettier with her natural hair. They were jealous af. Smh
fr
Literally came for this comment cuz I'm like what you even wearing that wig for!
You are beautiful
Neither of those fit her, on abt jealous be realistic
that's what I said. she is much prettier with natural hair. the weave looked silly.
It's bad enough that people in the world could be so cruel but when it's your own family that really hurts. I can relate to her.
Same my mom and my siblings did that my whole childhood
Sadly out ppl don’t wanna recognize most of our black beauty is shamed on by our own community and our own women more than it is by white ppl
Me too 😢
She’s so beautiful🥺
This story is all too common with different characters causing the hurt in our community. For me, it was my father. My grandmother is biracial so her and my aunt have the “3 a/b good hair”. I was blessed with type 4 hair. My hair just wasn’t like that and he had no issues letting me know. Thankfully I had supportive friends and family to reaffirm that my hair was/is beautiful.
I am so sorry you had to experience that for your own family members. it is a trauma in the black community that many of us have still not healed from. I have 3 girls. All 3 have completely different textures 2b, 3B and 4C....same mother and father. However, I made certain that each of my girls knew how uniquely beautiful their hair is....without chemicals. unfortunately many of us are still so addicted to these styles that do not keep our hair healthy and are quick but harmful solutions.....KNOW that all Black hair is BEAUTIFUL.
I'm so sorry you felt the way that you did . and this woman in the video is gawgus I can only imagine how good she would look if she had embraced her natural hair . Its hard understand like I see you haven't you seen you in the mirror ? so damn pretty . my mum used to sing the pork log song when I entered a room I don't think she realised how much it affected me . my skin is lije sagging now from how small I got n I feel quite ugly too . if I gain any weight my man of 20 yrs calls me fat he still does now n I weigh 45kg hoping closer to 50 atm
Sista you are so very pretty , I think you look better after the removal of the wig for real. Celebrate your prettiness honey! We were forced to were straight hair over our kinky coily hair to fit into a society who never excepted us. We must REturn back to our natural state. If you want to straighten hair do it with a flat iron or straightening comb like we did before the pressures of society .
@@ciaralee9760you need to tell him about how you feel cause wtf. He is weird
I hate the way the term "good hair" is used. Good hair should mean healthy well maintained hair. It shouldn't have anything to do with textures.
family really will tear you apart with their own insecurities and internal struggles. she’s so so beautiful, and i hope she realizes that soon. 🫶🏽🫶🏽
So true 😢
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Felt that
Yes. Some families who are like that need Jesus I have one of those but God has kept me strong that I above and not beneath. It does not matter what they say you don’t own any one anything. It was said in child hood so that is hard and it transpired into adulthood think you are not pretty if you do not wear your natural hair out.
Not just family, but people will tear you down
Simply Stunning. I hope you one day realize that. Adjust your crown and hold your head high🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
This breaks my heart. She’s beautiful. It’s sad a lot of insecurities can come from the people closest to you.
I am a 42 year-old white male, as I sit here and watch this video while I am sitting in my truck in my driveway. This makes me sad hearing that her mom and her sister would tell her that. This poor young lady now has a complex about herself. She is a beautiful person and no one should have ever told her that. She is beautiful!
Years ago , I went to many job interviews with natural hair , natural black woman didn't get a job until the day I wore a wig and put on some make up I got a job .
This world is really nasty.
@@MarieN8959 Although , you are validated to your feelings in which you consider is the truth , sometimes it doesn’t make it the truth . I , a black women have never wore a wig and got very great positions with my natural hair and no makeup . Your perception becomes your own reality. Your hair may have not prevented you from getting the job , but maybe their were other people best suited for that position in that moment . Black hair is only an issue in society if you lack the confidence while embracing it . I had great parents that would tell me everyday as I child that my hair was beautiful and it made me feel unique while going to predominantly white schools . One time I cried when I got teased by a kid for having curly/kinky hair and went home and told my mom I wanted to wear to straighten it . She told me No , because I wanted to straighten it for the wrong reasons referring to , getting teased because my hair was different . That built so much confidence in me and I was aware that my hair is who I am and why should I change what I was born with to fit in with society beauty standards . What this lady parents did to her is the complete opposite of what my parents did and that’s why feels ugly . 😢 Continue to wear your natural hair , love yourself , because our hair is beautiful 😊
The worst thing is for the people who are supposed to love you unconditionally make you feel unworthy of love. My family have always been the main ones to make fun of my hair, my weight, clothes, etc. I had to learn to love myself despite them. I am still working on completely loving all of me, but I know that I have to love me before I expect it from everyone else. ❤
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This all spills over from how black people were treat for the color of their skin and hair texture. We were made and still are to a certain degree that our black isn't beautiful, our natural hair is not good enough. So over the years we allow others to dictate what was beautiful. I learned to embrace My natural beauty.
Not only is she not ugly, she’s exceptionally beautiful!
Girl you are beautiful don’t let anyone fool you telling you that you are ugly
Nothing more beautiful than a blk woman rockn her natural hair, no matter how long or short it is, it’s urs & it’s real ☺️
Amen......our natural hair is beautiful!!!
Not true, there’s nothing more beautiful than ANYONE using their own hair no matter if it’s straight to if it’s coily it’s beautiful.
I swore and made a promise to myself never to wear that horse hair on my head again
Yesss
@@sonjiewilson Let this person speak in the topic of the video. We know that it can be any woman that go through this or but this is specifically an issue in the black community. Why do y’all do this? They were speaking about a black woman not all women in the moment cut that shit out
Family will help you jack your mind up faster than strangers! And most of the time, they are coming from a place of their own pain and discomfort and they aren't even aware of it. Sis, you are Gorgeous and BELOVED OF THE MOST HIGH, YWH!! 🙌🏽🙌🏽🥰🥰🥰
So true, and so disgusting that theyv will still call themselves "family"
Yep!
Yes , said it better than I was about to.
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I can relate about how a mother can say and do things that affect our self esteem ..😞.. May God bless you.. Having natural hair is a gift❤😇🙏🏽.. You are not ugly at all‼️‼️‼️😇❤️🙏🏽
Don't Let ANY Person Insult Your Beauty! ❤
This hits home. My mom was Afro Caribbean. She grew up with relaxers and roller sets and hot combs and flat irons and blow outs. I don’t even remember growing up seeing my moms hair natural cuz even a centimeter of natural growth they would panic and go relax it again. It was toxic. As I grew older I challenged my mom to go natural. During her process our family ridiculed, criticized, complained, belittled, and full blown insulted her saying her husband (my dad) was gonna look for another woman because of her natural hair. She was fully natural and looked beautiful! Everyone else loved her hair including my dad. I’m just happy that the last few years of my moms life i was able to show her that loving her hair and her beautiful black skin was ok ♥️. She felt beautiful! Love you and miss you mom ♥️!
That's so sweet. What stands out to me is that you said everyone else loved her hair. I'm sure they did, sometimes your biggest haters are related to you.
Your amazing. Thanks for showing your mother her real true beauty and making her realize how beautiful she was just as she was. Thats a huge gift you gave her.
People seem to create their own dilemmas.
@@IceLynne Bcse it's hard to break generational habits.
So true. Afro Caribbeans are like that. I went naturally 2 years ago and did the big chop. I got the same reactions. However, I was ready for it all because I have truly accepted that I am a beautiful, blessed black queen. 😅
There's nothing like a black queen, who reassures her own children. There's just simply nothing like it!
Sound like dad bounced.
That’s right!!
There’s nothing like a queen in general she’s gorgeous but not cuz of her curly hair or skin color ❤️ her heart and stunning features alone warm my heart
@@MsEliteForever no it doesn’t at all. She just simply spoke of her mom that doesn’t say single parent. More evidence needed. 😂
@@MsEliteForever no
She's beautiful, periodT!!!
Omg she looked sooooooo good with her natural hair !
No matter if you're black or white, going natural and being yourself is always beautiful .
Everyone is beautiful. However, being black plays a significant role. We can't just wear our natural hair and be considered beautiful, whereas white (women) can just wear a messy bun and be considered beautiful. We go through a lot with our natural hair, and it should not be invalidated because it is associated with white. It is good to love yourself and be natural, but in this world, black women and men cannot do so freely or freely care for themselves due to systemic oppression and racism. Don't justify it by saying it doesn't matter whether you're black or white because being black or white has a HUGE impact on oneself.
@@Edenadonis this.
@Eden Adonis I'm here to let you know that I do and literally always have found black women's natural hair beautiful and most people I have talked with feel the same way. I'm not to here to say you're wrong, in here to say you're beautiful and let that hair down ❤❤❤❤❤
@@Edenadonis I completely agree!
@@Edenadonis same. i'm a 16 yo black girl and i wonder if people even know how many times i've cried over my hair.
it's my worst nightmare to have to go to school with my natural hard-to-manage curly ass hair in a bun.
i feel so ugly and out of place. it's hard. i have to wake up earlier than i usually do so that i might have time to get my hair to work in the way that i'd like it to and to get it to be, at the very least, decent.
everytime i look at people with long, untangly beautiful hair that just perfectly whisps into a claw clip, i just fucking wish it was me.
show me a clip of any white/ asian/ mixed girl and i'd just be staring at her hair ,heh, and envying how easy it must be to;
•wake up,
•shower with your hair getting wet,
•being able to go swimming however/ whenever,
•couple brushes in the morning and hop off to school,
•to look amazing ,as you said, "in a messy bun".
damn. sorry for the rant.
but after all i do find a few pro's to the black girl life.
•we were all wonderfully and beautifully created by God in His image meaning that we are perfect.
•braids are divine expressions of hair beauty and i love how they look
•people ,for whatever reason, love to touch and play with my curly hair. creepy but very comforting and complimenting.
😅
I’ve never understood family members especially women tearing each other down like that! She’s so beautiful, it makes me so sad she carries that insecurity with her.
A lot of them care too much about what other people say so they pass that on to their children and family members. Sad. I was not raised that way at all. I was told I was pretty by my mama and daddy, my sister and brother, and grandmama that I never had to believe what anyone else said about me. I didn’t always think that I was but I loved that my family told me that. It made me never look to others to validate my looks.
I fell that also the saying goes misery loves company.
Family=1st institution of life
Family=worst institution of life
@@jackiesmith1325 facts!
I think you look beautiful with your natural hair. Be strong Queen.❤
You’re beautiful never let anyone make you feel otherwise
She's so beautiful and hope one day she'll realize that. I wish we would stop tearing down our own people.
You meant black moms hating on their daughters ,,, oh yeah! We know 😒🤬👊🏽👊🏽
@@GB2139 That's what I meant, but in general too.
This I do not know why anybody unless they were blind would ever call you ugly! Being blind or just being jealous because you are drop-dead gorgeous beautiful
We as black women are the only women that don’t really wear our natural hair and we help others make billions. This was an eye opener
Generational trauma can exist long after the cause of generational trauma subsides.
Cultural appropriation
People always made fun of my curly hair aswell. Not to the point I had to buy a wig because I'm white, but always had it in a ponytail until I decided to cut it off. Feels terrible because our hair is beautiful as it is and all that's needed it's a nice advice on taking care of our hair so it shines beautifully!
It’s roots in thats
Then just wear ur natural hair
She’s so beautiful!
The real is natural black beauty healthy hair wear your hair natural it's a beautiful thing❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
My family used to act like that sis. YOU ARE GORGEOUS!!! I had to remind them that I was BORN with curls and I'll die with it. It's a terrible mindset that the black community still need to work on (not just influencers). I was ecstatic when people started to go back natural INCLUDING my family ❤️ STAY STRONG and don't let societies "definition" of beauty try to define your natural beauty! 😘
I know men that will not impregnate 4c girls 😢
@@renarich4942 well if they tap it and they don't want to wrap it (because "birth control should protect them") then they're SOL LOL. But seriously, 🤷🏾♀️ everyone has a preference, we just have to respect it.
@@Abigail077811 I'm not on about a preference I'm talking about straight up disgust for those that look like them
I have a bit of a thing for curly, African hair is so beautiful. I would have loved to see Bonnie in TVD have her natural hair but i guess that didnt like that idea🤔
And you're so beautiful. I bet your natural hair is gorgeous.
As a black female I can confirm that black people, especially black family members can be toxic when it comes to our natural beauty. When I was a kid my aunt told me I would look prettier if I relaxed my hair. Honestly those words affected me mentally and made me insecure growing up. Good thing little me stayed strong and instead of following my aunts advice I took pride in my hair and started to take better care of it. Now my hair is flourishing and I get a ton of compliments and questions on how I maintain it. We are beautiful, we just need to realize it
Older black folks have really failed us in so many ways. That's why we're all so messed up.
@@Rainbow_Kiddd Nah hun. The younger generations screwed themselves up with the help of the government.
Sis your gorgeous. Own it!! ♥️💯🫂
You are beautiful don’t let nobody make you feel that way you’re a beautiful queen ❤
So I'm white, and this honestly made me cry. Growing up, every close friend I had was black or mixed. I know from watching my close girl friends growing up the pain that some of them felt not feeling "pretty" because of their hair. Your natural beauty is more than enough! I wish I could scream that to anyone feeling like it isn't. You don't need a wig! Your hair is just as beautiful as any other girl's hair. ❤ Every time I see a young girl of color I ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS compliment her and tell her I LOVE her hair or her eyes! I do it in memory of watching my dark skin friends struggle with their beauty. I hope every time I compliment these girls it's a memory they'll never forget.
White people do the same thing to their kids too; when i was at university, I had a couple of White friends who were anorexic because their mother's did the same thing to them, always commenting about their weight, and telling them don't eat too much, fat girl's are not pretty girl's" , " fat girl's always come last" and nobody likes a fat girl..." we'd go out for lunch and i could tell that they were hungry, but they would never eat because they didn't want to "Get big as a whale..." Even though they were size's zero to five. We would have study groups and you could literally hear their stomach's growling and their breaths smelled horrible. I felt sorry for them , the low self esteem & always second guessing themselves. We'd go to parties and no matter what they wore they hated how it looked on them no matter how much i and the other girl's assured them that they looked awesome. They really struggled with their beauty too. Sometimes a mother can be a girl's biggest bully. Smdh......
This is actually really sweet and they for sure remember ❤ I always do it means so much
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This is such a beautiful thing to do for others!! Thank you for being intentional with your kindness.
I hope she 100% knows she is not the toxic one, or ugly. So much pain, some parents don't realize how long the things they say stays with their children.
I agree I'm self going through something where my family is concerned ... They don't know how they damage you inside and it's coming from your own family it's sad
She looks so pretty with her natural hair!
That's so heartbreaking, I think she's beautiful
No one hurts you like your family can, they can be worse than your enemies.
Sad but true 🫤
Truth 😢
Facts. It be your own mom
True
So true family can really hurt u life long scars😢
It's sad when strangers bully you, but it's a whole different thing when your own family can't accept you as is. I hope she realizes that she is truly beautiful
She Beautiful. Everyone are beautiful . No ugly people im world but gorgeous in and out. Heart of gold that where beautiful coming from
Awesome woman for her honesty hopefully other children will learn from her lessons😢😢😢😢😢
People don't realize their words may not mean anything to them but to you they sure cut deep. My sisters and cousins constantly called me stupid and ugly (common sibling names) but for a long time I was getting basically called worthless years out of high school. While we still talk, I don't think we'll ever be close. Girl, I feel you and you're more beautiful then you think and don't let anyone bring you down!!
I've gone through the same thing oh, but I Jesus found me get through it.
A lot of times the woman that are called the ugliest turn out to be the finest as they grow older, so stay encouraged young ladies and young men!!!
Alot of black mothers damage you by saying nasty things to keep you from going natural. You just have to be strong 💪🏾 to get through it. They will come around once they see you with strong long beautiful hair or a head full of hair instead of weakened hair that falls out with over processed hair or braid extensions with no edges and wigs that itch. Be strong 💪🏾 to handle it. You have a goal to be your natural God given self. And he didn't make no mistakes on you!😊
Yes this very true of many black mothers 😢
Yeah I used to get the same comments. Now that my hair is long , it’s “omg your hair is so long and beautiful it keeps on growing”
Even if they don’t come around, it’s their problem not for you to carry. Be kind to yourself ❤️
What Mother encourages their daughter's to put wigs on at a young age? 😮💨
Yes my mom is the same way.
That "you need to DO your hair" mentality is what made a lot of us turn to relaxers at young ages. Your hair doesn't have to be flat to your head for it to be considered styled and beautiful ❤
Young lady you’re beautiful you really are and they were just jealous….who doesn’t want curly natural hair❤❤❤❤❤
Natural hair is the most beautiful because it is yours. Own your self-worth and know that those who try to put you down are the little people. You are blessed.
You mean like when you don’t do anything to it or your mean coily hair because if you mean coily, that’s not nice every hair is beautiful no hair outshines the other straight hair beautiful too
Some cultures believe hair holds so much personal power in our lives and we don’t even realize it. Which is why some cultures rarely cut /mess with their hair and also why a lot of people for for haircuts when they go through a significant emotional change. Like a makeover, except you’re rewriting your path moving forward
She is beautiful. Should never called someone ugly. Especially parents should never do that to their child.
😥💯