This is a really heartbreaking and tough situation I understand the husband's pov but I think he's thinking about it from a loving but selfish place. He's not the one that will be living in pain and he needs to really think about how this innocent, vulnerable baby who cant explain how she feels will experience life. He also needs to think about how it will impact his son. Some disabilities or birth defects make life challenging but others make it painful and devastating and a struggle just to live.
I don't mean to sound anti-man here. But men have gotten so comfortable dictating how things are going to work, that they don't see that it isn't always their choice. He was ok with aborting a (assumingly) perfectly healthy fetus, because HE couldn't afford it. So, it was his choice. However, once he became emotionally attached to the idea of having this baby, all that mattered was what HE wanted, to the detriment of everything else. He even blew up his marriage over it. Not over the destruction of a fetus, but over not getting to choose. This is toxic masculinity.
So let me get this straight. HE is OK to terminate when it's his issue that you guys are not financially stable. But now you have enough not more, but enough money to have another baby, and even one has to suffer, including baby, he wants to push hard. It's not your mistake. He is the one who is weak and cannot makeup his mind. He cannot get a day off for this, but can get long paternity leave?
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This is a really heartbreaking and tough situation I understand the husband's pov but I think he's thinking about it from a loving but selfish place. He's not the one that will be living in pain and he needs to really think about how this innocent, vulnerable baby who cant explain how she feels will experience life. He also needs to think about how it will impact his son. Some disabilities or birth defects make life challenging but others make it painful and devastating and a struggle just to live.
I don't mean to sound anti-man here. But men have gotten so comfortable dictating how things are going to work, that they don't see that it isn't always their choice. He was ok with aborting a (assumingly) perfectly healthy fetus, because HE couldn't afford it. So, it was his choice. However, once he became emotionally attached to the idea of having this baby, all that mattered was what HE wanted, to the detriment of everything else. He even blew up his marriage over it. Not over the destruction of a fetus, but over not getting to choose. This is toxic masculinity.
So let me get this straight. HE is OK to terminate when it's his issue that you guys are not financially stable. But now you have enough not more, but enough money to have another baby, and even one has to suffer, including baby, he wants to push hard.
It's not your mistake. He is the one who is weak and cannot makeup his mind.
He cannot get a day off for this, but can get long paternity leave?