HOW TO BE A HAPPY STAY-AT-HOME MOM! | Avoid Mom Burnout, Get Motivated & Be a Better Mom!
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- Опубликовано: 11 сен 2018
- How to be a happy stay-at-home-mom is one of the questions I get asked the most and today, I'm answering it! Check out online counseling with BetterHelp here: www.influencerlink.org/SH95
Being a sahm is a blessing but that doesn't make it easy! Over the years I have learned some "mom tips" to avoid mom-burnout and some healthy ways to take care of my mind and body so I am happier and in turn, a better mom! I hope these tips are helpful to you!
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Being a mom is one of the hardest jobs in the world and sometimes that can make us tired, burned out or even unhappy. Today I’m sharing how to be a happy stay-at-home. The happier you are, the better mom you can be!
Hi my name is maria.I am so thankful I found you ,I really needed your advise I am a mom of 7 children and my husband is a carpenter.so o am a stay at home mom that gets over welmes with the messy home not felthy but messy like not organized.so even though I have looked at many videos on motivation and how to start getting rid of clothes and toys and my things just over all stuff I don't need is a struggle. I have 2 infants at home in the say and so between running errands and the house duties I don't get it done like I should and I feel like I'm no doing my part to keep it clean. So when I watched your video it moved me because it us my situtaion explained from you.so I would like to get to get from you to help me and any other mom on here that us going through this or has in the past.thank you for ur help.
For the income part of it. My mom was a stay at home mom for the first few years of my life and she saved us so much money when she did that. Because of her, we didn’t need to hire any maids or babysitter. She managed out money and paid off over 25k student loans in a year. She always shopped for deals and we always had tons of gifts to give and amazing house decor.
My dad always said she made the most money when she was a stay at home mom becasue of how much she saved. She is working now and making a great income but still I never felt as rich as those first 10 years as my life.
Stay at home moms are amazing!! Thank you mom!
where did the money come from?
Soooo when can us dads get 10 yea off of work and have her go and get a real job , just switch the roles and for some reason I don’t think we’d get the same reaction 😂😂 at the end of the day the whole “stay at home mom” it comes down to trying your hardest to avoid getting a job lol
@@hawaiianrussian1047 if you wanna be a stay at home dad just say that. Raising kids and keeping a house is exhausting. If you wanna do it. Do it. I've worked and stayed home and worked from home.
@@aprildoty2961 lol it’s not that I want to be I choose not because.....how else are we supposed to keep a roof over the kids head and food on the table for the kids? Keeping a house is exhausting?! Compared to actually working a real 9-5 ?? That’s the part that most women try to avoid while trying to tell convince men that they have it harder somehow lol
So why do we hire a babysitter and pay them? It's not work? A chef or a housekeeper? We pay people to do that also.
I promise people think you're not doing anything when you are a stay at home mom. Like yea I sit on my butt all day and robots do everything around here. Or when people say a sahm is lazy cause they see their house messy. Like you don't clean 5 times a day. Cleaning up behind everybody including your husband
Thank you!!!
I love being a SAHM. It's such a transition. But once you realize how much you contribute to the family -- it brings so much pride. 😍
I am struggling with mom burnout so much right now. I feel like this pandemic has made it 1,000x worse.
I completely feel you on this! Im a mama of 3 and I feel tired from sun up to sun down, and you're right this pandemic makes it worse. I just read an article entitled How To Beat Pandemic Fatigue it was a great read! The article and others you might find interesting is located on JW.ORG check it out, hope you enjoy.
This is really helpful for a lot of SAHM out there. Women need to hear this message. I heartily agree that our worth is validated by its very nature, not because of the existence of a paycheck. I feel so blessed to be home, but yes, it’s not all gumdrops and rainbows all the time. All we can do is our best.
Thanks for this video. It's like you're talking to me. 😊👍 I love being a SAHM but it's hard.
I am a recent stay-at-home mom. My husband and I decided I would stay home after my maternity leave ended in April. It's been a lot! I love my kids and love being a stay-at-home mom. But, I have been very tired due to lack of sleep. People say to take a nap when the kids sleep, but I use that time to clean as my two little ones usually don't let me get anything done when they're up. So it's been hard, but I keep telling myself that it's for the betterment of my kids and family. Plus I genuinely love taking care of my husband and kids. I just be extremely tired!
I've been home with my twins for 5 years, without support from extended family. Its been very difficult to find a moment to refresh myself emotionally. Starting this channel (The Learning Patch) has been a wonderful outlet in trying to provide for my family (eventually) and support other moms with small children who need a moment to themselves knowing the kids are watching something educational and fun. ...even though starting a channel is hard work and without immediate reward, I LOVE what I do and hope to see it grow as time goes on! THANK YOU for posting this!!! You're doing AWESOME with your vlog and are an inspiration!
So beautifully said Becky, thank you! Being a SAHM is certainly hard at times, but it is the BEST job in the world.
I just wanted to say thank you! As of March of 2020 became a SAHM. Lately I have been struggling with who I am and my purpose. Have even told my hubby I feel worthless. Your advice and tips are great and now it’s time for me to gain my purpose and strength through God!
"Draw near to God and He will draw near to you." -TheBible🌺
Thank you so much for your words! 💕💖
🦋it is so important to remember your worth. You a freakin queen 👑 even if your hair is a mess OWN IT
Thank you for doing this video Becky, some great advice in there!
Wow. This is a great video. Thanks so much for posting this! 3 months into being a SAHM and these tips are so important to hear
I'm so glad you liked it!
I was a stay at home mom for 5 years. Then I worked the last year and I need to stay home again. My husband wants to work a little more and makes more than I do. But I will appreciate staying home this time and he appreciates it more knowing how hard it is with our kids. So I think it will work out better this time around. Working got me out of my depression so hopefully I can manage it this time
I hope it works out better for you this time! Just remember that taking care of your home and family IS a job! It's important work, even if you don't get paid. :)
1) list the things u do as SAHM 🖊
2) set goals for your home
3) set goals for yourself - things just for you! - things that make you happy n fulfilled. Keep up the relationship with yourself
4) don’t compare with other moms - u r ur own competitor
5) ask for help from ur spouse - team up with other moms, neighbors, babysitter
6) stay mentally and physically fit
I am sending my letter to you this morning on my grocery run. Makes me feel good to have someone that will overstand where I am coming from. I feel judged when i try to confide in ppl that I know about sahm issues. Thank you so much for this video
I'd be happy to receive a letter from you! I completely understand where you're coming from!
Thank you so much for this reminder! This was great motivation for me today. 🙏🏽💖
I'm so glad it was a needed reminder! :) Have a great weekend!
Thank you so much for this video!! I had planned to do these things an allowed busyness to get in the way of my follow through but emotionally I was still feeling the disconnect so this is the connection I need to follow through and not lose me in all of my responsibilities and service to my family! God bless you
I'm so glad it was helpful! It can be an issue with all struggle with so you're not alone! God bless you and your family!
So true! I’ve been a sahm for 13 years now-2 special needs boys and 1 girl. Every time I’ve “worked” at the workplace not sure why I’ve always had bad anxiety, and my body reacts horribly to that kind of stress. When I’m at home working, I’m actually more at ease with the “kid stress” not sure if that even makes sense! It’s hard with a balance because I do want my own money to save. 😭
Thank you so much for this video. I really needed this. 🙏🏻💙🙌
Love this video.. It's all things I think about everyday.. the good and the bad.. It's just feels sooo good to hear someone else saying. Thank you so much for the video.
I'm so glad it was helpful! You aren't alone! There's always someone who knows what you're going through and how you feel!
Thank you. I really needed this, this morning!!! ❤️🙏🏼
I'm so glad it was helpful!
This video was really helpful I'm just struggling with feeling tired all the time we don't have help from grandparents or friends I have to pretend to be happy everyday while wishing my 2 and 1 year old were at Nuersy so I can sleep a little ☹ it's really sad that I wish the years would pass quickly so I can have peace
Thankyou for this video,I’ve been a SAHM for 3 months now and this has been really helpful
I'm so glad it was helpful! Being a SAHM is definitely a journey but you do tend to come into your own as time goes on! :)
🦋it’s so important to remember to take care of you too. As moms we forget ourselves
So true! It's a struggle to make time for ourselves after we're done taking care of everyone and everything else. I literally have to put "shower" on my to-do list. lol
A Place to Nest 🦋lol I swear having a to do list is a life saver. As moms it’s easier to take of everything and everyone
Wow! This is amazing advice, thank you.
I'm so glad it was helpful!
Thank you THANK YOU so much for this video. I’ve been feeling very sad lately. feeling like I don’t have it all together 😣
Nobody has it all together...I promise! Just do your best and let everything else go! ❤️😊
Thank you for this video. It really helped me to not feel so alone. I’m normally very outgoing and enjoy going on play dates and activities and meeting other mom’s but recently I’ve been neglecting going out with people or showing up bc I’m a few months away from giving birth to my 2nd baby. I feel guilty that I’m letting people down and just don’t have the energy to do things and stay committed to activities and events. I feel like i always have an “excuse” lately such as being sick, my baby is sick or I’m just extremely exhausted to go out and keep my plans I made. So I’m struggling with feeling guilty and hoping i don’t “burn bridges” in relationships and hope people will understand while I take this time to just allow time for myself.
I'm so glad it was helpful! You definitely aren't alone! Your true friends will understand that you're not "up to" going out right now. Maybe you can keep up with your friendships through text or phone calls until the baby is born.
Thanks for the reminder!! :-)
You help me so much I don’t feel so alone anymore thank you
I'm so glad! You definitely aren't alone!
Thanks so much for your video, and the candid comments! Am so interested in your point of view. Have worked since age 13 (21 years, 10 of that in a very intense corporate environment) and feel completely blessed to have nearly 1 year of maternity leave coming up; completely relieved to be able to go back to work; and deeply, deeply grateful to live in a country with paid maternity leave. But also some of that judgement--grew up in a home where my dad, though I love him, has some seriously misogynistic beliefs. He crushed my mother in their divorce (he wouldn't stop cheating, she turned to alcohol, then he ruined her in court, financially and psychologically). He then enforced that by saying, "Never stop working, women get screwed in divorces." I was then in 2 long-term relationships reflecting dynamics with either parent, went to a good amount of counselling, and now feel solid and am in a great, healthy relationship. I spent years getting in touch with my own healthy feminine. But that underlying anxiety about maybe switching to being a SAHM mom some day is still there. For example, I would have such a fear of not making money; of not being competitive to get a new job; of being a burden, etc. If I became like an "employee" of my spouse I would have such anxiety ... looking forward to working through these beliefs :) Good prompts!
lovely video ! thank you makes me feel so much better 😌
Good morning Becky! Your videos are always thoughtful. Wish I could afford the therapy, it really does help. By God's grace though I make through everyday.
Check into counselors that will accept your insurance. Many counselors do and are so valuable in having a quiet moment to recollect and refocus. I hope you're able to find someone! Hugs and support to you!
This is quite beneficial for many SAHMs out there. This message needs to reach women. I wholeheartedly concur that our value is established by our basic personality and not by the presence of a salary. I'm so grateful to be back home, but life isn't always sunshine and unicorns. We can only exert our best effort.
You're so right!
Thanks Becky, always a help 😊.
I'm so glad it was helpful! :)
Thank you. The advice is very helpful.
I’m so glad it was helpful! 😊
I just found this video and I I'm so grateful that I did , something I feel hopeless but I know I'm not the only one , thank you for your support and wisdom I will subscribe at your channel 👍
I'm so glad it was helpful! You definitely aren't alone...remember that!
Thank you so much for posting this!
Thanks for the encouragement 😀
You are so welcome!
great video . As a stay home mom. I need to watch it
Thank you for your advice and sharing your what has worked for you ❤❤❤
You are so welcome!
Definitely needing this. I’ll be getting out of the Navy/having baby #2 in April and I’m very nervous for the SAHM gig 😅
thank you for this !
You’re so welcome!
You are so blessed to be able to stay home. I work full time so I have to do that on top of the household stuff. On those rare occasions, like maternity leave, when I’ve stayed home, it was so much more relaxing and less stressful!
Just discovered your channel and love it! Excited to watch all your videos and learn! New subbie here :)
Hello and welcome! I'm so glad we found each other and hopefully I'll have lots of videos that you enjoy!
You always have such smart and wise advice, Becky. I love your motivational videos like this that keep me thinking about the little things. You did a video a while back about happy mornings and one thing you said was you look forward to getting up in the morning and having your special cereal, and that really had me thinking about the little things and routine that I look forward to in the morning . I agree that it is very important also to have little goals around the house if you're going to be in SAHM and I continually have projects that are ongoing and set goals for myself.😀💙🌸👑
Great video Becky!
Thank you! :)
Wow! You said a mouthful! You helped me realize in so many ways that I am doing a good job. Thank you for the video. You made my day👍😀❤️👌🏻😀😌 #nomoremomguilt
my wife is a stay at home mom and she plays video games from about 2pm until 6:30pm. Rarely makes dinner. kids have had 1 of three dinner options for a month. She watches kids while doing virtual school. meanwhile the dirty dishes in the sink have been there for three days😀
She’s binge watching netflix shows from 8 pm tilll midnight or later.
Is this my fault?
Im under stress at work and still having to travel during a pandemic
I'm not a professional by any means but it sounds like she may be depressed or lacking motivation. I know for me, until I started looking at taking care of my home as my job, I was much less motivated to do things. It can be really hard to be motivated to do anything around the house when no one is making you. It's not like a job at a company where you have bosses to answer to so being a stay-at-home mom/wife really requires a lot of self-discipline.
@@aplacetonest I know she is depressed but I cannot fix that. She has to. I told her to go to talk to someone but she wont.
People say we aren't really working but babysitters and maids do the same things we do.
It's a matter of choice. Rechoose motherhood and think deeply about your purpose. Getting up early to have time to yourself and remember who you are each day is essential to remind yourself that you are a person and that you are choosing to live your family that day. Every day is a choice to live and love again. Make sure you are setting healthy boundaries and taking good care of yourself and then you will feel more of a desire to care for your family and you'll find joy in it. Seeking God and seeking to understand his character and that he does everything for the benefit of all (pure and wise and unselfish love) is very helpful. As I'm coming to know God by rising early in the morning to pray, read scriptures and start a creative project I feel his Spirit of love and untouchable peace and I'm given the strength to love my family every day. Realizing any sins that need to be repented of was a main part of it for me. As I've repented of my sins and stopped doing them, I'm able to improve and progress and learn so much more than before. You can do it too
I'm a new subscriber to your channel. And new at being a stay at home mom. I really like your videos. Thank you for Sharing your views. It's a crazy hard change. Your views on this is really inspiring to me. Thank you
Hi and welcome to my channel! I'm so glad you like my videos! It can be a difficult adjustment but it does get easier over time once you get into a routine AND make time for yourself!
I love your Disney videos so much
Thank you! There will be a new one up on Friday!
@@aplacetonest can not wait:)
That makes us all the more amazing that we do all this for free!!!
God must think I'm really strong. my husband died unexpectedly last year at only 37 , leaving me lost without him, like there's half my heart and soul missing, the pain of our 5 kids and me is unbearable at times. It's hurts to breathe without him here. 50+ more Christmases ahead and only 2 Christmases behind me without him
i just prayed for you..May God's love sustain you in time of loss
I'm so sorry to hear about your husband. I can't imagine what that must fee like! Even though it doesn't seem like it, God is looking out for you and He will provide a way for you and your kids! I will say a prayer for you and your family!
I really needed this. I've recently had to stay home because my children are having some health issues and I was taking too much time off so I had to stay home to take care of them. I feel guilty that I am not bringing in money. When I do work I will only go back part-time. I wish people would stop telling me I need to work.
Don't worry about those people. You just keep doing what you feel is right and let them think what they want to think. I'm sure you're doing a great job!
I'm so burnt out. I'm 11 weeks pregnant and so incredibly sick and tired. I need motivation to get off my ass for this second trimester. I've still been playing with my 2 year old and getting up with him at night but the house stuff is neglected
It's really hard in the beginning but I'm sure it will get better as time goes on. Don't worry about the house right now. Just take care of yourself and your 2 year old and you can worry about cleaning later. :)
I hate when others think that because I'm a stay at home mom that I do nothing all day.
I’m just so tired. Got any tips for getting more energy, besides more sleep?
Believe it or not, exercising gives me energy. Even if it's tiring in the moment, I am more energized throughout the day, have more motivation and sleep MUCH better!
How do you make time for exercise? Who watches your kids when you do?
When my kids were little I would do a 10 minute metabolism exercise video and they would just play around me. It's also wise if you can get up a little earlier than your kids and take time to exercise and have a little time to yourself before starting the day. I'm really enjoying getting up at least an hour before they do to pray and connect deeply with God, read the Bible or other uplifting books, exercise and then start a creative project that I can do a few minutes at a time throughout the day and then for a little after they are in bed. You could also get them to bed as early as possible and do your exercise and alone time then. It's a matter of prioritization. Set your goals (keep them simple and doable) and make it happen. My goal this year was simply to get up at 5am so I can have a little time to myself to fill my cup and then I have something to give to my family to help and serve them.
@@Motherwhosings thank you. My 10 month old wakes up once a night and is up at 5am. There is no way I can wake up before 5 to work out. Maybe once they go to bed but that is tough because I am exhausted by the end of the day. I also have a 4 yr old who does not nap.
@@bfwanks6977 One thing that helped me was to get a running stroller (found a a really good joovy one on facebook marketplace). I would bundle up my little one as soon as we were both awake and walk for a few miles. It helped me so much and I lost a bunch of weight and got lots of time to think while walking around.
Here are some songs I've done about motherhood and being a parent:
"Music of Motherhood" ruclips.net/p/OLAK5uy_n1cYdCFqK59381LQDSWN70b67dUzEJQQE&si=i5choqAmhxORwUWU
"How Will They Know?"
ruclips.net/p/OLAK5uy_kboS4g4BbsTcVfD0JR-HbfafvL2ZoruYk&si=EEYqD4yQNVAmNvTX
What do you do about feeling alone?.. have no friends. No extended family. Great community but everyone has their own thing. No one to talk to. Husband doesn't understand he gets to leave and go be with adults at work
I understand that completely! I don't really have any friends to speak of but I've learned to be happy and fulfilled on my own. I have a creative outlet, my channel, and that has made a huge difference in my life. Perhaps you could find something that you enjoy doing, and is fulfilling, to help with the void you're feeling.
@@aplacetonest I'll try to find something. Thanks for the advice :) some days are better than others.
i've been home with the kids for a while and i couldn't get used to it ...no social contacts, no income 😟i am too dependent on my partner ..now i work part time and do the housework 🤷🏻♀️also for later I think it is important for My retirement if you break up with your husband you are financially independent but if you never work you have nothing 😕
Saying that being a stay at home mom is hard while having a nice house, good income is like saying that it's hard to be a millionaire and to take care of your Lamborghini.
I don't deny both situation can be hard. But you can't complain.
I know people having kids and struggle to survive so being able to be a stay at home mom... Just be happy