A Visit From Ole St. Gabe (A CSGO Poem)

A cursed CSGO version of the famous poem "A Visit from St. Nicholas" Thank you for watching and Merry Christmas!
Poem:
Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
not a single light was on, not even the rgb of the mouse.
The ornaments were hung on the tree with care,
in hopes that Ole Gabe soon would be there.
The players were all using their gaming chairs as beds,
while visions of the Anubis collection danced in their heads.
And Miles in his box, and me in my throne,
Getting a good gamers rest so we can be in the zone
When deep in my guts arose a great clatter,
I sprinted to the bathroom to sort out the matter
But from my porcelain chair I noticed a sight,
that drew my attention and made me forget to wipe.
The moon shining brightly on the nasty dead yard
If what I was seeing was skin, it would be battled scarred.
Then just as went to give my eyes a rest,
I noticed a minivan being towed by csgos best
With a big ole driver, surrounded by babes,
I knew in a moment it must be Gabe!
More rapid than fiber internet, his coursers they came,
and he whistled and shouted and called them by name:
"Now De-ha! Now Dupreeh!
Now, Pasha and V4lde!
On, Karrigan! On, Cadian!
On, Doo-mau and Brollan!
Someone smoke porch!
and someone smoke hall!
Now rush! rush mid!
While they can’t see at all!"
And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
the prancing and pawing of each gamers shoe.
As I drew in my head and was turning around,
through my ethernet ole Gabe was bound.
He was dressed in a mink, and had on some crocs
Like a true gamer, he was gucci’d down to his socks
A big ol case was tied to his back,
and just like an addict, he cracked open his pack.
His eyes had black rings! His pimples were plump!
His neck beard was full, and his nose packed with gunk!
He pulled from his sack a small USB,
Which he stuck in my computer, and he smiled with glee
He quickly opened my steam and added balance,
Then he uninstalled one of my games with a face full of malice.
But next he navigate to my trade offers,
While itching his ass and downing my water.
But what happened next I could hardly believe
The trade offer was from him and he was accepting for me!
He clicked accept in a hurry, and gave a big grin
as filled my inventory with some mid tier skins .
But then all at once he leaned over and farted
But based off the look of his face my bet is he sharted,
He did a smell test, and I don’t think he passed,
So he jumped from the chair and there was a blast!
But soon the dust settled and Ole Gabin wasn’t there,
All that had changes was my inventory and a stain in my chair
But then I heard the gamers trotting on the roof
And I ran back to the window to see off the troops
I watched Ole Gabe fade out of my view,
And returned to battle station to see what was new,
But I heard him exclaim, as I got back on my computer,
"Happy Christmas to all, and no update for the foreseeable future!"

[@Crawdeddys_kitchen]

Culture is finally returning, I can feel it the second renaissance is coming

[@NefiFlota]

It's the best poem I've heard in my entire life.

[@SupCoolPal]

I see you really took your time making this masterpiece. W poem

[@syazwanhilman2490]

Bruh
Get this man an award mann

[@m4rloncha]

Fucking awesome, this deserves more attention.

[@vindicies7399]

omg how much work this must have been! anyways, the northpole set as location got me laughting hard :D

[@slumbubba]

I'm glad somebody noticed that lol

[@hashen_chamal]

So he didn't Wipe 0:38 and he sat on the stained Chair 3:00
Ok. That's weird.
Anyway, Merry Christmas and hope you unbox more knives in the following new year.

[@Coleisgood]

I cried three time

[@slumbubba]

The power blinked while I was editing it and I cried 1 big time 🫠

[@SwooceCSGO]

lmao