When the idea (or process) of getting out of bed during the night creates worry and anxiety
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- Опубликовано: 28 июн 2024
- If we regularly get into bed, enjoy being in bed, and sleep well in bed, our mind associates the bed with sleep and relaxation. If we regularly get into bed and spend a lot of time wide awake, feeling frustrated, angry, anxious, or worried, then our mind associates the bed with a lot of unpleasant wakefulness.
If our mind has learned to associate the bed with unpleasant wakefulness, it can activate the body’s “fight or flight” response when we go to bed in order to protect us from the perceived threat associated with being in bed. Of course, this is not helpful when it comes to sleep since sleep only happens when we are sleepy enough for sleep and when we are calm and relaxed enough for sleep.
The good news is that you can form a new, more helpful association and help make the bed a long-term trigger for sleep. This is typically done by using the bed only for sleep and by getting out of bed if sleep doesn’t seem to be happening.
Related video:
What to do during the night when you can't sleep because of chronic insomnia: • What to do during the ...
One of the most popular ways to implement this technique is based on the estimate of time - if you’ve been awake for 15-30 minutes, that is your cue to get out of bed for 15-30 minutes before returning to bed and repeating the process.
Sometimes, the very thought (and required effort) involved in getting in and out of bed - perhaps throughout the night - can itself generate arousal and lead to people quite understandably not trying the technique or abandoning the technique before they get results.
Related video:
What to do if the thought of trying CBT for insomnia (CBT-I) techniques gives you anxiety: • What to do if the thou...
So, for people who find the idea of estimating periods of wakefulness during the night and who find the idea of getting out of bed to be worse than staying in bed, I like to suggest a slightly different approach - if you are awake at night but being in bed feels good, allow yourself to remain in bed because conditions are probably right for sleep.
If, on the other hand, you are awake in bed and it doesn’t feel good - for example your mind is racing, you are worried, frustrated, angry, or anxious - then you might use that as a prompt to get out of bed and do something you find relaxing and enjoyable until you feel conditions are better for sleep. Then, you might return to bed and repeat this process as needed.
When you implement this technique, getting out of bed should always be a more appealing alternative to staying in bed because you are only getting out of bed when being in bed doesn’t feel good. You are also giving yourself the opportunity to shift focus and attention away from sleep by engaging in a relaxing and somewhat enjoyable activity (watching TV is just fine), and you prevent yourself from reinforcing a negative association between the bed and unpleasant wakefulness.
Related video:
If you have chronic insomnia, it's OK to watch TV at night: • If you have chronic in...
Every minute you spend asleep in bed, and every minute you spend out of bed when being in bed doesn’t feel good, is a minute spent retraining your mind to associate the bed with sleep and pleasant wakefulness. The end result is you make your bed a strong long-term trigger for sleep and you give yourself a more pleasant alternative to staying in bed when being in bed doesn’t feel good.
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My name is Martin Reed and I am the founder of Insomnia Coach®. I offer sleep coaching services that give people with insomnia all the skills and support they need to enjoy better sleep for the rest of their lives. I also offer a free two-week sleep training course for people with insomnia at insomniacoach.com/sleep-train...
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All content found on the Insomnia Coach RUclips channel is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
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All content found on the Insomnia Coach RUclips channel is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
These videos have helped me get my sleep back! I no longer worry about sleep and I use to be scared of staying awake at night for years. I can now fall asleep anywhere and I'm not consumed with worry all day about the night time. Thank you Martin!
I am so happy to hear this, Stephen! How long were you struggling with sleep before you made your breakthrough and were there any specific techniques you found to be particularly helpful at reducing sleep-related worry and improving your sleep?
Hi Stephen, I wonder how long did it take you to get your sleep back on track? And what techniques helped you most?
@@InsomniaCoach my insomnia struck in July of 2017. I was going through some challenges and started to stay awake more and more during the night. Since I have anxiety it attached itself to my sleep habits and thinking and it caused some dark thoughts surrounding insomnia and sleep. I did have a break through about 6 months after, but it came back in October of 2018. I still didn't understand my anxiety or CBT yet, so once I found your videos I started to change my thoughts regarding sleep. Oh you mentioned in a video that we can't press a sleep button. This helped me so much!
@@ninasimonovic761 The thought of not falling asleep is still present, but I no longer react to that thought. I can lie down and let my mind wander and fall asleep anywhere. When I was younger I didn't focus on sleep like I do now, so I try to think simple minded when it comes to sleep. I have also explored my brain genetics using Genomind assay test. My genes cause sleep to be difficult sometimes, so I focus on diet, exercise, etc. This helps in conjunction with Martin's CBT techniques as well. I took a few months to realse my fear, but sleep came back quickly.
@@Fruitbasket5101 thoughts of not falling asleep are always in the back of my mind too when I go to sleep.. how do you actually get rid of them and just let go? Because they are deep subconscious thoughts,I don't choose to think them, they just pop up in my mind without control and when they do, the brain refuses to fall asleep.
I think it’s so helpful to have another option. I used to feel so anxious when in bed, but now I’m so much calmer and I prefer to remain in bed. But will always get out of bed should my anxiety take over. I believe a one size fits all approach to CBTI isn’t always appropriate. I think a bit of flexibility is good. Your videos and approach to insomnia is terrific.
Thanks for your kind words, Pat! I agree that it's important to have some options available - one size rarely fits all!
So helpful, Dr. Reedd
I'm not a doctor, but I appreciate you sharing that you found this video helpful!
This has been very informative. I look forward to trying this. I am grateful for your sharing your knowledge.
You're welcome, Christina! I'd love to hear an update in a few weeks!
Thank you very much, , very helpfull, 👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼
You're welcome!
This was very helpful!
Thank you for sharing that!
All i can say is thank you Sir! You just saved my life... 🙏
You are too kind! I merely provide information - it's up to viewers how they choose to use the information. So, I suspect it's more likely that you saved your own life!
I love this technique i stay in bed less but i feel a very restful sleep thank u
Thanks
You're welcome!
Awesomeness
This is a great tip . I fight with myself when I can't sleep and whether I should get up and leave the bedroom. Now I know if it doesn't feel good leave the bedroom
Thanks for letting me know you found this helpful, Sophie!
Many thanks for these videos, they are very helpful and informative. I just started CBT-i recently and i find hard to get out of bed when i wake up during the night. What i do sometimes when i feel very tired but I can't fall back to sleep is going to the living room and lying on the sofa, and sometimes i fall sleep there, but i am not sure if i am supposed to do that. I don't do it with the intention of forcing myself to sleep, but to rest.
You might find it helpful to return to bed when you start to feel sleepy on the sofa - this way, when you sleep, you'll sleep in your own bed and this will help you create a strong association between your bed and sleep. When you sleep on the sofa, it might be a missed opportunity since you could end up training yourself to associate the sofa with sleep rather than your own bed!
Thank you so much for these videos!
So you are saying that it is ok to lay in bed as long as it feels ok? This is very helpful, as I have been reading abou CBTi, and trying it out I get frustrated during the night because staying awake and reading a book instead of relaxing and resting feels like a waste of time 😅 I enjoy listening to guided relaxation when I wake up during the night, so that might be the best approach for me as long as there are no anxious thoughts or feelings.
I believe so! I think a workable goal can be to practice responding to wakefulness in a more workable way - a way that doesn't involve going to war with sleep, wakefulness, and all the thoughts and feelings that might be showing up. If staying in bed while feeling comfortable helps you move away from that struggle, then I think it can be a helpful approach to take.
This helped me learn the process of retraining your associations is a gradual one. I always worried about not getting back to sleep that same night if I got out of bed. Now I realize it’s not about one night.
Bingo! Short-term pain for long-term gain :)
This is the first time I’ve heard this process described with the option of staying in bed if everything is fine, and you are feeling pleasant and relaxed. I’ve heard the purpose of the retraining explained before, but this was really very clear and easier to understand. Thank you!
Glad you found this helpful! Thanks for sharing :)
Thank you. The idea of staying in bed even if you wake up, provided you are relaxed and having a positive experience, is great. Other CBT-I I have been reading says get out of bed ... Unfortunately, when I get out of bed, it produces enough stimulation that I am not be able to resume sleep, and subsequently I end up with 3-4 hours of seep. I am one of those folks that does not know when she's sleepy as getting over tired results in me getting "wired". I have had chronic insomnia (over 10 years), which I have learned to manage but in the last three months following international travel had a set back.
Thanks for sharing! You might find these videos helpful, too:
What to do when you feel sleepy early in the evening but don't feel sleepy when it's time for bed - ruclips.net/video/_o-y80hs16c/видео.html
How to improve sleep when you don't feel sleepy and don't know how to get sleepy - ruclips.net/video/TaFD4ivgLKw/видео.html
Your voice is calming
Thanks for sharing that!
Ur videos r great help
Thanks for letting me know you are finding the channel helpful!
Your videos I listen to it religiously. It has saved me bless 🙏 ❤
These have helped me SOOOOO MUCH and have tried everything for extreme insomnia for many many years and have tried everything even hypnosis with no help. I am so grateful for the simplicity yet powerful information here. Thank you 🙏
You are so welcome - I appreciate your engagement and support of the channel!
Me too Gigi!!!!
@@pattidunegan8395 Wonderful!
At age 70+, I have more than 35 years of good sleep associations in the very bed and room where, after only a few sleepless nights, chronic insomnia took hold, and all my associations became negative. It took only a few bad nights to wipe out over 30 years of good associations.
Those decades of good associations now seem to count for nothing!
Even the CBT-I therapy has created negative associations as it has caused me to associate my bed with having to drag myself out of bed. My bed has become a place of “in and out” struggle. Though in the last 2 weeks I have modified that approach after reading “The Sleep School”, still, every time I go to bed, I worry about having to get out and find something to do (when there is nothing in this world I want to do but sleep). 35 years of positive associations toward my current bed ( plus over 35 years of positive associations in beds of my younger years) gone.
You know, I think that it can be helpful to give ourselves the goal of simply making unpleasant wakefulness more pleasant. So, if you are awake and feel comfortable, there's no need to do anything. If that wakefulness starts to feel unpleasant, then you have the opportunity to do something more pleasant instead - and that more pleasant activity might be something you do in bed or out of bed.
Thank you so much for these videos and information you provide Martin. My question concerns whether it is okay to listen to a guided meditation or podcast in bed when I can't fall back to sleep. I have difficulty with staying asleep and I'm currently in my third week of sleep Restriction Training. I continue to have early morning Awakenings and while I do get up and go to another room to read, relax etc, sometimes when I return to bed it is the same problem. Because my sleep window is pretty narrow (5.5 hours), I sometimes feel like it would be more productive (i.e. sleep promoting) to listen to the meditations in bed rather than going into the other room, but I don't want to be doing more harm than good. Any advice would be appreciated so much
It's definitely OK! My only concern would be what your intention is - if you listen to meditations in bed with the goal of making sleep happen, then that action becomes a sleep effort, and sleep efforts are rarely helpful (because sleep cannot be controlled). If you listen because you find them relaxing and enjoyable, then that's not something I feel you need to be concerned about!
Loving your videos thanks. For the last 4 months I have been waking up in the middle of night and unable to fall back to sleep. No problem falling asleep when first going to bed and am asleep in a couple of minutes. Have been trying sleep restrictive therapy & CBTi for past month but not working too well. Some nights still waking up in middle of night or early morning. Have tried getting out of bed but it's hard. When I do get out of bed I will read a book or try mindfulness for about an hour. I'm not stressed or anxious. After the hour I then go back to bed and try to sleep although not sleepy but cannot fall back to sleep. My question is, should I just continue to stay up if I don't feel sleepy? And what do I do if I wake up when it is early morning (sun is rising) even though I want to wake up a couple of hours later? Do I just get out of bed and stay up?
There's no simple answer here, unfortunately. First of all, I'd suggest making sure you are allotting an appropriate amount of time for sleep - if you are allotting way more time for sleep than your average nightly sleep duration, you might be setting yourself up for long periods of nighttime wakefulness. I'd also suggest allowing yourself to remain in bed when awake, for as long as being in bed feels good - since that implies that conditions are probably right for sleep if your body decides to generate more sleep. If being in bed starts to feel really unpleasant, that can be a good cue to get out of bed and do something to help make being awake more pleasant, until conditions feel better for sleep. Finally, I'd suggest making sure you are always out of bed/starting your day by the same time each day - regardless of how the night goes.
Great video Martin but I have to sometimes get up 6 times and I basically don't feel sleepy when I get up or before my sleep window starts, I am actually worried that I am learning a new pattern of conditioned arousal when I get keep getting up, ie that I will never get to feel sleepy, when will I feel sleepy, why don't I feel sleepy etc, which is basically the same anxiety and negative association as lying in bed thinking I will never fall asleep
What's your cue to get out of bed and return to bed, James? In terms of the sleepiness, this video might be helpful: How to improve sleep when you don't feel sleepy and don't know how to get sleepy - ruclips.net/video/TaFD4ivgLKw/видео.html
Thank you so much Martin for your wonderful video ,it sounds great 👍 I had watched some of the video's and even my doctor suggested strictly stop watching TV and using phone before going to sleep because of blue light reflection is that really affects?
Well, I've not heard of anyone with chronic insomnia suddenly experiencing better sleep after not watching TV or using their phone before going to bed - so I suspect it doesn't play that much of a role when it comes to sleep! I think the bigger potential sleep disruption comes from stimulation rather than blue light - it's very easy, for example, to be consumed by the content on our phones (such as engaging in social media or reading the news) and this could delay sleep onset and distract us from recognizing sleepiness cues.
You might find this video helpful: "If you have chronic insomnia, it's OK to watch TV at night" - ruclips.net/video/HuHE462q_c8/видео.html
@@InsomniaCoach well explained 👏🙏🏻 coach ,I agree with you, from 2 days days I'm using phone till the time my sleep widow starts sleeping at 11 pm and waking up at 6:15 am I wakes up at 5 am but I'm so happy and peaceful from you, because I was waking up 3 to 4 times in a night your techniques working 🙏🏻 thank you so much...
@@yogafitnesswithvbw187 This is so good to hear - thank you for sharing!
@@InsomniaCoach I need to thank you from bottom of my heart 🙏🏻 coach your giving free treatment to everyone ,my sleep improved lot your a game changer, all the respect to you 💯🙏🏻 from india 🇮🇳
@@yogafitnesswithvbw187 You are welcome! Your sleep improved because of your own efforts and your own natural ability to sleep!
Hi Martin, new subscriber here :) First of all thank you SO MUCH for these videos - I have recently started experiencing chronic insomnia (for about two months now) and I have definitely started making stressful associations with the process of being in bed and trying to fall asleep. Since watching your videos I feel a lot calmer when in bed (awake or not) and most of the time I do eventually drop off (as opposed to before when I would sometimes get about 2 hours of sleep, sometimes none). I was wondering if you could make a video about different type of sleep? I am now able to stay in bed and feel calm but when I fall asleep I feel like I never get deep sleep, I'm still sort of half awake/dream sleeping. I know this because I twitch a lot more and I'm still constantly subconsciously checking whether I'm awake. Are there any tips or techniques to counter this - to get more restful sleep when it does happen? Thank you so much again for your content
Thanks for subscribing - glad you're enjoying the channel! I am so happy to hear that you are feeling a bit less stressed about sleep since less stress and worry immediately creates better conditions for sleep! Thanks for the great suggestion regarding a video about sleep architecture - that's something that's now on my list for the future!
In the meantime, it might be reassuring to know that the body always prioritizes deep sleep - as a result, the body is pretty much done with deep sleep after as little as around two hours of sleep. It's hard to remember deep sleep as we are - you guessed it! - deeply asleep when it happens! It's much easier to remember the lighter stages of sleep, especially if our sleep is very fragmented.
One way we can consolidate our sleep and improve sleep quality is by ensuring we are allotting an appropriate amount of time for sleep because usually when we spend too much time in bed, we spend more time awake and get more of that lighter and more fragmented sleep.
I hope this helps!
I feel like this
@@InsomniaCoach Martin, what do you think about the sleep tracking watch? How accurate do you think they are? After my insomnia kicked in, I started monitoring my sleep cycles and finding out that I only got 30-50 minutes of deep sleep at night led to having 0 deep sleep at all (according to what the watch says). Tracking it this way definitely creates more stress to your already anxious brain. 😟 Do you recommend not tracking your sleep at all? How can you check your improvement then? Thank you!
@@TheAduos I've yet to meet someone who recovered from chronic insomnia tell me that they found a sleep/activity tracker helpful. Many tell me that making the decision to stop using one was something that really helped them shift attention away from sleep. These devices can also be inaccurate for people with insomnia and, ultimately, there isn't much we can do with any of the data anyway since we can't control sleep architecture. So, I don't really see any upside to using them.
I wonder if evaluating your progress/improvement might best be done based on how you feel, rather than how many minutes you might be sleeping?
@@InsomniaCoach Sleep tracking sometimes is helpful on those nights where you aren't sure if you slept much. Then you check your watch and it says you got 6.5 hours sleep, with good amounts of deep and REM sleep. In these situations it can raise confidence in your ability to get sleep. Although the opposite can be true as well, on those really bad nights where you get a very bad score and it shows you only slept 3 hours or even less, it can really crush your confidence. I think you are right though, tracking sleep makes you think about sleep when we actually shouldn't think about it at all. I have insomnia for about 4 months and I have been tracking my sleep. Maybe its time i ditch it
I have this problem right now. I just started CBT-I three weeks ago, and from my sleep log Sunday nights are my worst. Mainly because it's the first night of the work week. For whatever reason I have mistakenly trained my brain to fear the start of the work week. I do much better on the other nights of the week. I did better this week on Sunday night, but it's so hard to retrain your brain.
Sunday night insomnia is very common! It can be more likely to occur if we sleep in later or spend more time in bed on Sunday morning, and it can occur if we put more pressure on ourselves to fall asleep on Sunday night!
Hi Martin, thank you for these videos which are so helpful. I’m implementing the techniques and am on a 12-6 sleep window. I completely understand the rationale for getting out of bed when I wake in the night (which is my main sleep issue), but I find myself resisting it every time! I get worried that if I get up and spend even more of my short sleep window up and awake, I will be a complete zombie the next day. So I stay in bed and continue to feel stressed!! Just writing this I know that I need to bite the bullet and just get up in the night! Any tips to help get over this? Thanks in advance.
I'd suggest reframing this - since wakefulness is a normal part of sleep, there's no need to get out of bed (or do anything, for that matter) for as long as that wakefulness feels comfortable. Perhaps you might think of it as a time for some rest and relaxation. If that wakefulness feels unpleasant, you might do something more pleasant instead - and that more pleasant activity can be done in bed or out of bed. If you feel as though sleep might be returning you can stop the activity and repeat the process, allowing wakefulness to exist for as long as you feel comfortable. I hope this helps!
@@InsomniaCoach that's helpful. Thinking of wakefulness as time for some rest and relaxation and not as something to be avoided at all costs makes a big difference. I keep getting caught up in the fear that I won't cope the next day, but I am finding, that despite some very minimal sleep, I AM functioning ok, even if not quite as well as I would like. Will start to focus on how the wakefulness feels... when it's unpleasant, will do something different (and maybe get up!). Thank you!
@@catherineedenborough4851 You're welcome! I appreciate you letting me know this was helpful - and for sharing that big insight about how functional you can be, even after difficult nights!
Dear Mr. Reed.
I only slept 2 hours. Since then I am awake.
I watched your video "waking during the night is normal' and I thought after watching this I will probably fall asleep.
But unfortunately no.
I went to bed 7 times and tried to fall asleep. But sleep doesn't come.
I don't have much thoughts like: how will I function tomorrow?
My thoughts are more:
Will I ever ever get rid of this all? Will I ever cure?
At the moment I think:
That's not normal. Nearly 4 hours of thinking turning tossing instead of sleeping.
This is just not normal.
I know so much, ... but sleep doesn't come.
How many days can someone stay awake before your body forces you to sleep? I'm thinking of not even going to sleep later tonight because I'll probably be awake frustrated and anxious. How long does it take to build sufficient tiredness that you will sleep no matter what? I have a busy day today but I wasn't able to sleep despite feeling 'tired' but still can't sleep. I live in a noisy apartment and had my white noise machines on all night and still couldn't sleep.
I think it gets to be very difficult to remain awake after around 48 hours of continuous wakefulness - but everyone is different. The thing about sleep drive is, it always wins in the end! ruclips.net/video/88YtI4WeNsQ/видео.html
Wait You just said tv watching is fine-but sleep hygiene tells us no electronics before bed and blue light disturbing. Which is it-pls clarify for me. Thank you for all your help- sleep not perfect but getting better on most nights.
If sleep hygiene worked, it would cure chronic insomnia. Since it doesn't, perhaps it's not something that's helpful for people with chronic insomnia! I watch TV and pay no attention to blue light exposure and sleep just fine. Do you know anyone else who does the same? If so, what might that mean?
How about when you love in room and all you have is a bed that becomes a chair 🪑 couch 🛋️ table and off course bed? Is there something that can be done in terms of association?
I think it can be helpful to simply do something more pleasant whenever nighttime wakefulness feels unpleasant and where we do that more pleasant activity isn't really all that important.
Can you still get out of bed if you’re on medication, or is this a “depends on the med” situation?
My problem is that I dread getting up because the house is freezing. So when it doesn't feel good in bed because I'm anxious I now put my earphones in and listen to an audio book, something I have read many times so it's not too stimulating. So far I'm finding 20 - 30 mins and I'm relaxed enough for sleep.
Thanks for sharing, Christy!
Hi sleep coach! What if I can't sleep, my mind is calm in bed, but i still don't fall asleep? This usually happens to me, and i feel really tired during the day.
If you feel comfortable in bed, I don't think you need to do anything - if the body wants to generate sleep, it will do so!
Every time I get out of bed, I have to worry about waking up my wife, which only makes my anxiety about hopping in and out of bed even worse. Last night I got out of bed twice, and ended up sleeping on the couch the second time after waking up my wife. I know anxiety is the primary source of my problem, but I can’t just think or wish that away.
I am yet to meet someone who could permanently delete anxiety from their brain! If getting out of bed is a problem, you might want to stay in bed - perhaps you might do nothing for as long as you feel comfortable and if things start to feel uncomfortable, you might do something else (for example, read in bed if that doesn't disturb your wife) instead?
I'm watching this at 4 am. I got up to drink coffee and eat breakfast because I've been awake most of the night. ☹️ I've given up on sleep.
Sometimes it can be worth just getting the day started when sleep doesn't seem to be happening! If you are observing an earliest possible bedtime (and not napping during the day), heightened sleep drive increases the likelihood of sleep on subsequent nights.
I am definitely not napping during the day! I can't even sleep during the night let alone during the day when it's noisy. I'm too busy during the day to sleep. I think in my case it's arousal that's keeping me awake at night. If I fall asleep I usually wake up 4 hours later and can't go back to sleep again. I usually go to bed early and wake early but I found I wake up way before my alarm which goes off at 5 am. If I lie awake at night I feel like I'm wasting time in bed if I can't sleep but it's hard to do things at 2 or 3 am when my neighbours are right across the wall. Many times I get out of bed to make breakfast and start getting ready. But end up feeling fatigued throughout the day.
@@monikavarro2020 If you're getting four hours of sleep at night, then this might be evidence that you CAN sleep - you're just not getting quite as much sleep as you'd like to get. That's a big difference, and recognizing this alone can sometimes help reduce sleep-related worry because thinking that you can't sleep can generate a lot of worry!
It is cold here and getting up is not fun.
In that case, it sounds as though staying in bed would be more fun - and that's just fine! All we are doing here is giving ourselves a way to make nighttime wakefulness a bit more pleasant; so if being in bed feels really unpleasant, we can get out of bed and do something more pleasant. This also helps prevent us from reinforcing a negative association between the bed and unpleasant wakefulness. If being in bed doesn't feel good and going to a cold room doesn't feel good either, you might want to explore ways that getting out of bed might be a bit more pleasant - perhaps setting up some blankets (even a heated blanked) on the couch "just in case" or investing in a space heater might be worthwhile?
Sometimes when I get out of bed, i start dozing off and when i get back in bed I'm wide awake. Then i start to get frustrated. Any ideas to help?
You might want to practice staying in bed, perhaps doing something more appealing, to get more comfortable with being awake in bed - perhaps your mind is expecting a bit of a battle when you get into bed and so it fires up to protect you? So, training your mind that there are no battles to be had, that there's no protection needed, might be useful!
@@InsomniaCoach first off, thank you for answering!
I might be confused, I thought we're supposed to get out of bed if we're not falling asleep so we only associate the bed with sleep. However, I enjoy reading in bed most times. Are you suggesting I do something like that in bed so I can just click off the light if I'm sleepy?
@@Deadlift750 It sounds as though that might be a more workable approach! After all, if reading in bed caused insomnia, nobody would be able to read in bed and get a decent night of sleep, right?
@@InsomniaCoach thank you!!
@@Deadlift750 You're welcome!
Not being able to sleep causes more anxiety for me.
You CAN sleep, Monika - you just aren't getting quite as much sleep as you'd like to get! There's a big difference between those two statements and there's usually a big difference in the amount of anxiety each statement can generate!
I think not being able to sleep generates more anxiety because I feel like I am trying to force myself to sleep which is the opposite of relaxation. Because I have a busy day the next day and I have the sleep window and I can't sleep. If I miss the opportunity to sleep the next day I won't get the opportunity as I have to be out of the house. I don't think I need as much sleep as regular people. I've seen your other videos too!
@@monikavarro2020 It sounds as though you recognize that trying to force yourself to sleep isn't helpful - might there be an alternative approach?