MIKVAH SCENE IN UNORTHODOX! What is a Mikvah REALLY Like?!
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- Опубликовано: 25 май 2020
- A #mikvah is a #Jewish ritual bath and in the Netflix show #Unorthodox Esty has a very dramatic experience in one - but is this what they are really like? I wanted to share what my experience going to a real mikvah is like compared to the one shown on TV - including what the mikvah looks like what a mikvah is and what the mikvah attendant lady does. Come chat mikvah #withme !
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Immersion in a Mikva is actually one of the things I’m most looking forward to about completing my conversion. Thanks so much for doing this video to make it a little less of a nerve-wracking experience!
I'm excited for you! It's such a beautiful way to mark this new beginning for you!
It is a great experience and really simple. The three rabbis witnessing (they did the questioning there in the lobby prior) stood outside the door to hear me say the prayers. They were super respectful, and only opened it a crack so they we could hear each other.
My rabbi helped guide through the prayers when they needed to be said.
May your conversion be a lovely journey as well.
I was nervous, too, (because of the whole naked thing), but it turned out to be a moving, beautiful experience. And once I was done, my conversion was complete so it was SO worth it! I wish I could go more often, but the mikvah is pretty far from me.
Rachel H. Thanks so much. I’m so excited!
Kit Hiniku that seems a lot less scary that I was imagining it after that scene. I’m so glad you had such amazing, respectful rabbis to guide you!
Marion, i Love your videos. You make it so wonderful to learn about your religion. I want to binge watch so many. Thank you so much.
Do it with meaning in your heart 😍
That is so kind of you to say and I really appreciate it! Thank you for watching / bingeing!!
When I first went to the mikva, I was afraid of going under water. The attendant was very patient and helped me overcome my fear. Now I enjoy the experience more.
That's so lovely!
This is absolutely beautiful. What an amazing way to draw close to God. As a Christian, we do not have this, but I can see how spiritual this would be. Thank you for being so transparent and teaching us about your beautiful religion that honors God. 😊
You are so welcome, thank you your kinds words that inspire me to continue sharing!
I am glad my religion doesn’t suggest that I am unclean by my period and need to be cleansed before being near my spouse. Come on, you can’t clean this up to be something holy, it’s women treated as dirty. Period.
AlohaLivin You know this is still commanded by God in the Old Testament right? Just because the Torah was fulfilled in Christ doesn’t make this unholy to women.
@@alohalivin556 If I were to play devil's advocate for the mikveh, I would say that the prohibition against sexual intercourse for 12 days makes a husband treat his wife in a non-sexual way for a short period. In other words, he cannot treat her like a sexual object all the time. I can see the advantage to this. Also, while normal menstrual blood is sterile, a woman can have a disease like Hepatitis C--which she can get in innocent ways like pedicures or colonoscopies with improperly cleaned equipment--and these sexual prohibitions prevent transmission to the man.
As for the ritual immersion, I understand that many women, who often have lots of young children at home--enjoy this little break from crying kids and household duties.
However, I also understand that the references in English translation to uncleanness and impurity can be off-putting.
@@jessicaramer6630 12 days of abstinence is a considerable amount of time each month. How does the man purify himself before engaging in sexual interaction ?
I am so glad I have come across you. You're amazing and you're just another confirmation that my conversion is the right path for me. I'm so excited about the Mikvah. Thank you.
Thank you so much for your kind words!
I went to Mayyim Hayyims mikveh for my conversion and when I started IVF and both times were beautiful and meaningful experiences. During my ivf immersion, the guide helped me pick a meaningful prayer for me and she showed my husband how to be my witness. It was a beautiful moment for both of us.
That's so beautiful, thank you for sharing your personal experience. I'm so glad to hear it was meaningful to you at such a special time.
Thank you for sharing. ❤️It seems such a wonderful spiritual experience. It’s like your are honoring yourself
Thank you so much for watching!
Thanks for recommending Shtisel in your video critique of Unorthodox. I didn't want it to end and absolutely loved it!
I'm so glad to hear it!! Did you like Shira Haas more as Esty or Ruchami??
She is a very talented actress and I loved her in both roles. I think playing Ruchami prepared her for Esty in some way though.
This was so beautiful. Your message at the end was something I really needed to hear as someone trying to become more observant ❤
Wonderful explanation. Thank you❤️
Love your attitude about your spiritual life. Very refreshing. There is something really spiritual about you.
Thank you so much, that's so kind of you to say!
This was so helpful for me! I am not Jewish and have wondered about what immersion in a Mikvah is like for a long time. Thank you for teaching about it!
You're so welcome!
This is very beautiful and such an amazing thing to do ♥️ thank you for sharing. I look forward to more videos like this. I seen a new beginning on the folder. That’s so inspiring 😍
Thank you so much!!
idk what I watched that made youtube recommend ur video but, boy am I glad they did!!! watched a couple of ur videos today and obviously I had to subscribe 💓💓💓
That's the best compliment, thank you!!
Thanks for sharing Marion! When I watched the show and that scene in particular, I thought about you (bc I previously watched your video on Mikvah. So beautiful!) ❤
Wow that's so cool, thank you!
I loved this video 💕 you always explain everything so well and I love the idea of the Mikvah as being a spiritual experience. I love learning about Judaism and I love watching your video's as I learn so much 💕 x x
That's so kind of you to say, thank you so much!
Thanks for sharing. I learnt a lot! Wonderful vidéo!
Thank you for all you share. You provide an amazing understanding of the Jewish faith and culture.
so so beautiful, such a kiddush Hashem, it is so absolutely true that going to the mikva is such a spiritual, empowering experience, really a celebration of womanhood in all its aspects at different pinnacle points in one's life.... the whole idea of preparing and being so perfect clean is to ensure that nothing is coming between you and the waters as you immerse, for water is life, the Torah itself is compared to water; at that moment nothing is getting between you and your Creator...thank you so much for sharing this with us!!!
I love the way you put it, thank you for sharing yes it's so true!
Beautiful thank you for sharing this
You are so informative and lovely. You’re very soothing by the way you present. Thank you for all your videos. I enjoy and love learning about Judaism.
Thank you for sharing your experience! As a viewer of Unorthodox, I did not think that it was trying to say that all Mikva experiences were like that, but more so just telling her particular experience.
Your videos always make me feel so validated and at ease in my practice. I was raised in a secular household but have grown into my faith as a Jewish person as I've gotten older. When trying to teach my partner about Judaism I feel like such an imposter because I can't do things perfectly, nor can I remember everything I feel like I need to in order to be a Real Jewish Person, so to hear you emphasize that intent is more important than execution is just. Ahhh. So comforting.
You have phrased this so beautifully and this idea of imposter syndrome keeps bubbling up in my comments and DMs on Instagram as people just feel like you say that they don't know how to do it "right" so maybe they dont do it at all which is so sad as it doesn't need to be this way!
You explained this beautifully! You are so right that it is about our special time connecting with G-d & He cares more about the intentions of our heart than getting every ritual perfect all the time. Well said & well done Marion! Shalom.....Ginger
Thank you so much, you really understood what I was trying to get at, thank you!
Thank you for this informative video. I am about to construct a Mikva in a stream in the near future. I want to learn as much about them as I can to assure I build it keeping in mind how it needs to be built to be used appropriately and easily!
I love your videos. I always learn something.💗
Thank you Lisa!!
You are a blessing! May you and yours be written in the book of life.
Thank you so much for your kind message, wishing you a year of health and happiness as well!
Love your videos! I followed your Purim video and it helped me so much. I just had my Mikvah, due to social distancing we had it at a lake of one my Judaism classmates properties it was so amazing. Keep doing these amazing videos!💜
I'm so glad you were able to find a way to make it work, I think using an outdoor one can be even more spiritual!
My Jewish Mommy Life Yes it was .. much calmer and more serene..
Thank you for your time!
Thanks for watching!
Wonderful video. I was supposed to start training to be a mikveh attendant but then, Covid happened. I hope that I will be able to do it once our world calms. I am Reform, not many of us go to one very often. My experience at the mikveh was so great, the attendant was so helpful, and she really put my nerves at ease. I want to be the person that makes sure Jewish women of all movements are not scared and have the best experience possible!!!
That is so amazing to hear!! I am praying that things will return to normalcy soon and you can continue on!
I love the practice of the Mikva. The first archeological evidence that I know of a Mikvah in the classical sense is from Minoan Crete, Greece. It would be very familiar - a large pool with two different steps in and out with a partial divider in-between - walk in one way and out the other. I’ve not done a formal Mikvah per se, but have done many “more in the wild” versions which are quite common around the world. The easiest for me is along a private spot of water (creek/river/lake/pond/ocean) is to first clean in a good dip in the water and scrub with sand or leaves, rinse, then spend some time onshore thinking about your purpose/intentions/feelings for this (obv can do it earlier if it’s freezing cold!). And then slip fully into the water and let yourself float, let the water and air cleanse everything away; and enter a place where you remember that you are a part of everything is sacred. In some seas and temperate waters I’ve been blessed to have spent free time merely floating for ages; cooler waters are best on a hot day or after a hot sauna or sweat lodge. Regardless I think, I guess a Mikvah is a Mitzvah?
Thank you for this beautiful and informative video. One correction I'd like to share is that there are actually numerous and complex laws related around what makes a mikva kosher. The idea is that it must be rainwater (not running water as mentioned in the video) for it to be potent. Rivers and oceans are perfect but running water from pipes are in fact not kosher for a mikva. If you're wondering why you've never actually immersed (toiveled) in rainwater that's because a mikva is constructed in such a way that there are more than one reservoirs of water (boros) at the mikva. One of them is in fact rainwater that was gathered when the mikva was originally established (sometimes by chopping ice from an outdoor source and transporting it to the reservoir - bor - at the mikva). The second reservoir is the one that you actually immerse in that is filled from the pipes like any other running water. When that is filled, it is not yet kosher to be a mikva, however, there is a pipe connecting the two reservoirs (one of rainwater the other of regular running water) that is covered. The covers are briefly removed and the waters touch each other (in what is know in Jewish law as "hashaka", like kissing) and that renders the water kosher to be a mikva and provide ritual purity.
I think it is a spiritual experience, in itself, to prepare oneself for the mikvah. When we pay attention to preparing our hair, nails, etc., for an encounter with God then we are, I think, more aware in the mikvah of all those aspects of ourselves being prepared by God for the new experience that will be upon us soon: whether conversion or marriage or birth. (In some ways I see keeping kosher similarly: if you have to think about it and choose it then it is a deliberate practice and behavior.) So much of the time we are so obsessed with details, we lose all contact with the purpose of an observance, a ritual, a piety. You are so right that it is to be respected, yet all these things are to connect us to the eternal, spreading before us and beyond us, and what our contribution is to that. In a way we are preparing ourselves as an offering. You are a blessing to converts who need to relax and be made welcome and taught.
You explained it in such a beautiful way, thank you!
I think the mikvahs are very different depending on what community you go by. In the local Orthodox (non Chabad) mikveh, the attendant is absolutely in the room with and will to check before you immerse and will stand by the side to make sure you completely immerse.
That is a good point, as with anything I always encourage people to go where they feel comfortable and closest to God. The mikvahs listed in Mayyim Hayyim website and the ones associated with the Conservative community like the one I went to should all be similar. Also it is totally fine to call beforehand and ask what the protocol is!
Very well explained
A few people have already commented on concepts such as chatzitot being a reason for the intensive mikvah preparation and roles of the mikvah attendant so I won’t repeat those things in detail 😁. My own mikvah experiences have mostly been in Israel with the exception of my first time before my wedding which was in the United States. Regarding my mikvah before my wedding, it was a beautiful experience. The mikvah attendant made a trail of rose petals for me to walk on to the mikvah, and once I was done and robed she threw candies and danced with me. She also gave me a little gift of lotion that they give to all kallah’s (brides to be). I’m not sure that every woman would appreciate this experience but it made me feel special and like royalty. I’ve mostly had positive mikvah experiences in Israel. One thing that I find special about the community I now live in, is that women from across the Jewish spectrum come to our mikvah. There is a universal warmth among both the women and the mikvah attendants. I grew up conservative like you and now am part of an ultrorthodox community, and when I was growing you rarely heard of women outside the orthodox community going to the mikvah. It truly warms my heart that this beautiful mitzvah is becoming more widely universal among Jewish women. I want to thank you Marion for being a positive Jewish voice and a kiddush Hashem at a time when we truly need it. Wishing you a chag Shavuot Sameach
Wow that is so beautiful, it's so lovely to know you had such a beautiful experience I just love the rose petals and dancing that is so lovely!!
Here in South Africa at orthodox mikvah there is a mikvah attendent when you are going into the mikvah she holds your gown or towel infront of her face while you going into the mikvah,she observes that you are immersing correctly,then once you are finished she holds a towel or gown infront of her face so you take it from her and you put the towel or gown on. Its all done very modestly!
That's really good to hear! I'm glad it's done well and makes everyone feel at ease.
This was an important video for women to see. I am 71 and I remember my first Mikvah experience as just a horror. I came from a very orthodox background but NOT Chassidish . I was 20 years old when I was to get married . This was no arranged marriage. I already knew this man well and truly loved him and still do. In those years it should have been my mother's job to explain things from a "woman's point of view and guide me through that first time. Back then no Mikvah existed in NYC that eliminated the "mikvah lady" with preying eyes.It took a lot of personal spiritual work for me to come out of the first time and claim this beautiful ritual as my own.
Wow thank you so much for sharing your story and I'm so glad to hear that you were able to find a way to overcome those initial feelings to make it work and meaningful to you!
@@MyJewishMommyLife .. I do follow your channel. I felt I needed to tell my story because I do have profound understanding about how the Mikvah experience can go wrong. I identified with how it is portrayed in Unorthodox and believe that such an experience can happen in our times. I am saddened that such a negative experience would put a woman off of going to the Mikvah.
The mikvah lady is there to ensure that you fully immerse. We don't judge. They ask questions because, well, have you ever forgotten to wash behind your ears or to take off your watch before bathing? Everyone forgets sometimes. They want you to have the best experience.
It sounds lovely. 😘
Very much so!
Dear Marion.
Thank you for your videos. You clarify alot for people who otherwise wouldn't get a chance to learn.
As a matter of fact,I teach kallas,religious and secular alike and I find that many secular ladies continue to use the mikva monthly and find deep meaning in the mikva experience.
Could I perhaps differ with you on some points,from a strictly halachic perspective?
Emersion in a mikva(or any natural waters)is required whenever uterine bleeding occured. Menstruation,after child birth,after a miscarriage and before marriage( as an unmarried girl don't use the mikva,she never really purified herself from the time she first menstruated)
Whilst it is a unique and special experience,it is halachically as required as after marriage.
Some women have the custom to use the mikva towards the end of pregnancy and before yom kippur. There's no halachic requirement for that,it's purely out of a personal desire and no preparation is needed.
Regarding the preparation: Washing oneself is required in addition to all that has been mentioned.
The job of the attendant:
Marion,you're absolutely right in your comment that her job is not to pry. But she (or ,as a matter of fact any lady considered an adult by jewish law) does have one job: to see that the body is fully emersed in the water. That's all. She doesn't need to be there prior,and not when exiting the waters.
I've frequented many mikvaot around the world and can attest that there's sensitivity to the feelings of the mikva user. Marion,you explained the experience and the spiritual aspect of it beautifully,and I agree that the tone and atmosphere is one of serenity,spirituality and a mikva attendant ,while careful to stay invisable,makes sure to to part with words of blessing,adding to the positive experience.
Thank you!
This is so beautiful. I get a little envious of religious groups that have rituals like this. I'm a Christian and, while we do have washing and anointing rituals within my denomination, they are more metaphorical than literal, though similar in tone and meaning to what you've described here. I'm sure it's that way now to make women comfortable, but I do wish it was more literal/physical. Perhaps I'm simply feeling called to ritualize my own preparation so I can feel even more connected to the Father during those rituals.
And thank you for sharing!
You are so welcome! yes I agree sometimes it really helps to have a very physical component to access our spirituality!
I think she did a sort of a mikveh when she went into the lake in Berlin. Maybe it wasn´t the way normal mikveh would work but it seemed to me like that was the real spiritual experience for her and very important step in her journey. It was sending the message that you can keep the traditions and experience joy in them but it has to be your own journey and not someone elses. She was reconnecting to her Judaism and trying to deal with the collective trauma of her community. It was very powerful. Anyway, that is what I think.
Yes I definitely felt the parallel there too!!
Honestly when u start discarding basic jewish law and rejecting Judaism and doing many things against Jewish law and then proclaim to sort of go to the mikva aka lake for a cleansing its kind of twisted. She blamed her circumstances and upbringing connecting the suffering to her Judaism. She came from a dysfunctional family and her marriage wasn't great. I get it. But these things were not caused by herJudaism. A dysfunctional home and bad marriage will damage and cause pain and disassociation in whatever environment or religion she was born into.
My problem with her series is that first of all ... its not at all a fair or accurate description of chasidic life. Im satmar chasidic and I used to see her in the local supermarket. We grew up in the same neighborhood. She also had many people who loved her and had many friends. She might have felt inferior because of her unstable family life. Im not saying that what she went thru isn't true but I do believe its so rare and not the normal at all. Nothing like my experience.
@@Star-qh5wp If your experience is very different, than that´s great. But her experience was like that and she needed to find her own way, not only how to be in the world but also how to experience her Judaism in a meaningful way for her.
@@therra1101 what she is experiencing now is not Judaism at all. She blamed the entire community and made it seem like this is our life. She put a label on everything thru her lens and experience that is 99.99 percent not the truth but is being taken by many people as the standard. If you read her book she is going against every single jewish law in the Torah. She could have became less observant and gone to counseling for her childhood and unhealthy marriage. Then rebuilt her life in a meaningful way and joined another community that better fit her. But no. She decided to make money by selling a sensationalized version of her life and bashing everything and everyone publicly. Im a part of this community and you might say I'm prejudiced against her story but the truth is I know the life here and her story is so far fetched from it. Is it sad if all she says is the truth? Yes. Is this a true representation of chasidic life? No. Go check out Peter's videos on utube about our community. Thats a true representation. He is non Jewish and filmed a 13 part series. Enjoy
The reason the attendant is there is to make sure you are completely immersed. Jewish family purity has been around since we received the Torah. This is your insight into the mitzvah but orthodox observant Jews do things a little differently.
Francine Flaks Yes you are correct. The mikveh lady will say "kosher!" After each time you immerse. Or let you know that you were not totally immersed so you know you have to immerse once again. Not only is she there to check that you have no chatzizot (stray hairs on your body, or leftover nailpolish on your fingers or nails, or anything that creates a barrier between you and the mitzvah water, etc.), she is there to see that you immerse properly. It doesn't have to be a mikveh lady either. My husband once served as my mikveh attendant in Hawaii, where they use the ocean as a mikveh. It is not just about running water, it must be a bath filled with pure rain water. And different sects have different interpretations of what makes a kosher mikveh. Some say it must be side by side whereas others say it must be top to bottom, depending on your minhag. I do agree that it is important that the first time you visit to the mikveh should be a positive experience as mine was not and I have never enjoyed going to the mikveh. However I do understand the concept and the meaning of visiting the mikveh and the mystical powers it holds. I hope that anyone who goes has a great experience and feels connected to Hashem, especially when the mikeh lady says "kosher, kosher kosher" after each time one immerses themselves. Otherwise it can leve a bad taste in one's mouth. But don't give up! And be sure to follow the halachas so you know you did it right! To go to all that trouble only to find out you did it "wrong" is a waste! Best of luck!
Thank you for including that, yes my experience is with a mikvah at a Conservative synagogue, each branch of Judaism does things differently and that's ok.
Will you be sharing how you celebrate shavout?
Marion, I have learned so much watching your videos. Thank you for sharing. I was wondering if you have read the book. Ladies Auxillary by Tova Mirvis? It was a good book in my opinion but just wondered what you thought of it? I have read that Tova has left Orthodoxy since she wrote the book.
I haven't thank you so much for the recommendation!!
I loved that book. I am not Jewish, and I did not read this to bash or badmouth or feel superior. I am here to say that, as the author found, too, that this applies to other faiths as well, with a small change of vocabulary. ;-) Goodness, as she heard from readers and what is my experience, too, is that it even applies to secular, non-religious close-knit communities! As Miss Marple would say, "Human nature being what it is..."
Well worth the read! I found it challenging and a great starter for soul searching- a test if we are living out the Maker's calling and channeling His love and grace to others, while seeing ourselves for what we are.
Btw, I would love to use a mikva, at least once. But, as a (even kosher-hearted) Gentile... :-/
I, too, have read that the author left orthodoxy, maybe Judaism all together, I think even before writing this. :-(
This is very similar to what my people do. Only we use "living water" that is specifically designated lakes, streams, rivers, etc.
Wow! You are amazing! I am a black Catholic and I really enjoyed your video!!
Thank you!!
So beautiful and informative after also watching your pregnancy Mikvah. No disrespect as I have a question, can non Jewish people participate as well (separately of course) in a mikvah ceremony to support a friend of who’s had a baby or experienced a loss or would that be considered as strictly prohibited. I’d love to have such an experience as well and support a family friend of ours.
Hello my friend,
You are doing a favor to so many people by demystifying Judaism.
As always, these are my favourite topic for videos.
Side note -- I think I established a new normal that included back my latte and RUclips. Yay for me!
That's such a kind compliment, thank you! And yay for lattes and RUclips that is one of my favorite routines too lol!
An interesting point is that in the Satmar community the mikvah attendant is not optional, and in the book Deborah (Esty) had an experience with the attendant which was even worse than the show. Their rule is for the attendant to certify you are ritually pure. She was assured by her kallah teacher that the attendant would not see her unclothed but the attendant forces her to undress and inspects her in the bathtub.
I have a question,what would the situation be if a woman had prolonged bleeding? Something due to a hormone imbalance such as PCOS or a cancer like cervical cancer? Would you just refrain from physical touch/intimacy for that entire time or would a woman dealing with something like the above not be considered for marriage?
My immersion in the Mikvah after my conversion to Judaism was positive, renewing and spiritual. While it was awkward being naked with my Cantor, they allowed my husband to be present in order to help me since I'm disabled and was 5 months pregnant at the time. It wasn't forced, humiliating, or negative. I would do it monthly if we could afford it, but we cannot. I should note that I'm Reform, I had an incredibly supportive female clergy member to prepare me, and I was in no way pushed into doing it.
So glad to hear it was such a positive experience!
I do have to point out 2 things. Firstly that a man isn't allowed into the mikva. All attendants are women. And respected older women in the community. Also they never speak or say who was in the mikva. Its not something they can talk about. Also being that you are reform your conversion is not recognized by orthodox jews and you are still considered to be non Jewish by Torah law.
I haven’t seen unorthodox but I’ve read the book and it seems the series is missing an important detail: In the book, Deborah Feldman writes that the Mikva-attendant attending on her was later arrested for sexual assault. So it’s explicitly clarified not all Mikvas are like that and that specific attendant was in the wrong.
I recently watched your Mikvah video and wish I had a chance to go in pregnancy, I went after my baby's birth though and although my Mikvah was not as lovely looking as your one was, it really was a special experience, were I married I would go all the time just because I think it is a beautiful ritual.
Wow that's amazing! I'm so glad that you were able to go after all that you had a positive experience there!
I'm not Jewish but this sounds like a wonderful spiritual experience. Make me think
Hi, Marion, Roman Catholic fan here! 🙋♀️I always found Judaism a fascinating faith to learn about; your religion is “our parents “ and we have borrowed some of your sacred rituals and styled them to our own, even with a holy language, which for us is Latin. I am curious about one thing: If a Jewish person does not honor the many kosher dietary laws and DOES in fact eat food frowned upon, or food is prepared in a non-kosher way, does that constitute what we know as a “mortal sin?” In other words (and I am dead serious) if you don’t follow the “food rules “ in Judaism, to ask bluntly, can you go to hell for that? Now bear in mind I’m looking at this with a Catholic mind, steeped in my Faith since my infant Baptism. Thanks so much! Nice to see a woman like you abiding by a no -nonsense faith (as some of us Catholics try to do 😬; both are very strict) , in these morally depraved and frightening times. God bless you! 😊
I love learning about the Mikvah.......I wish I could go to the Mikvah, but I am not Jewish.
I have used the idea , to create my idea .....giving time to myself to pray, cleanse my body and soul. I want to be completely respectful of your religion , so I am not saying I created a Mikvah . I am very happy to learn about the Mikvah.
I have never been to a Mikvah orthodox or otherwise, although I have been to public baths in Japan and in southern California. My mother was so upset by her own personal experience prior to her marriage in 1946, that when I was already dating men seriously enough to consider getting engaged or married that she fervently repeated that she did NOT expect me to go to a mikvah and I didn't have to go to a mikvah or have my nails or hair cut. So dear, if you were not traumatized there probably are 100 of us who were compared to you. And no, neither my daughters nor I have ever gone into a mikvah. On Rosh Hashanoa I throw my sins out to sea on the waves.
Bless you sister ✡️☝️😍
Mikvah means gathered water. Running water is actually disqualified. (Unless it is connected to a well). So not all bodies of water are Kosher.
Actually most mikvahs are pools of rain water that have not been collected in a vessel (or rather are connected through a hole to such a pool). The water in these mikvahs must be still rather than running.
Does anyone know if non jewish women are allowed in the Mikva? I really would like to go.
Wow thank you for explaining this in such a beautiful way and it is about your heart. Can single women do a Mikvah?
Thank you so much! Yes!!
They don't need to. It's for cleansing before reconnecting to your husband. In fact, if your husband is out of town when it's mikva night, it's better to wait and go on a night when he'll be home.
Would I be allowed to use the mikva if I have tattoos? I know traditionally tattoos are forbidden, but our JCC is (supposed) to be opening one later this year, and as a convert I'd love to visit it
Yes... People with tattoos use the make about all the time.
I am a monthly user with many tattoos and no one bats
Yes definitely you should be able to find one that you feel comfortable with!
It's almost the same like Muslims did. It's like holy bath we do it after monthly period or after giving birth or after miscarriage and after husband and wife jobs.. I realised now so much in common between Muslims and Jewish..
Love your explanation. Can someone who is not jewish can go to a Mikvah bath?
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You're very welcome! I just answered another comment like this it's a very popular question, it's not the practice to do so but you can definitely use an outdoor flowing body of water like an ocean or lake to immerse in spiritually and you can contact a Mikvah associated with Mayyim Hayyim to talk to them about it as well.
Do you have to be 100% Jewish to immerse in a formal Mikvah like the one in your video? Or do they let people who are half-Jewish or even non-Jewish immerse as well?
They mikvah is done by people that are Jewish or going to the mikvah to convert to Judaism. I don't know of any mikvah in my area that would let non-jews immerse. I know of Torah Christians who have a mikvah situation of their own but I am not sure how they do it.
I have had this question so many many times and it's really up to the individual mikvah and what their policies are. That being said you can use a lake or an ocean as a mikvah! If it's important to you maybe call one or find a rabbi that will work with you.
I've also wanted to ask this question too ; if a non - Jewish can go to a mikvah after I watched your video, I'm Christian but we culturally observe immersion (our form of mikvah) though not religious ours is more of tradition. But surprisingly everything you said and did in the video tallied with my culture including the prayers. It sparked a curiosity in me that made me start studying about mikvah!
Is there a safe guard in place to make sure Jewish women are using it and not just random people going in because they are curious and are "Looky Lous"
It’s totally private each person goes in on their own.
This is whole reason why I personally do not believe in organised religion. If you do then that's fine with me. Each to their own. I was born a Muslim and at eight years old I was made a Catholic; long story. But now I am an agnostic. When I see rituals like this the first thing I think is if there is a god and he was so powerful and great would be really give a dam about stuff like this.
It is also extremely important that the audience understands that the writers of the show express how it was inspired by a book that one person shared about their personal experience. To elaborate; it was written by writers INSPIRED by ONE person's life experience. A writer's job is to create a dramatic experience for entertainment. The unfortunate thing is that with the timing of the increasing anti-semitism in the world, this show only furthers stereotypes of the Jewish people, despite the intention to entertain on the writers' part. We should be portraying positive messages about ethnic/religious groups that already have a tough time fighting off stereotypes to begin with. Hopefully people can take this into consideration so we do not inadvertently increase the ignorances in this world. Baruch HaShem!
Is there a mikvah for men ? after all they have emissions , probably during that time of abstinence particularly.
Lol yes. Men go to the mikvah more often then women. Many go every day!
The one time I went to the Mikvah, I took a shower, I was completely naked, even down to no nail polish, I was very, very wet! LOL! There was a Mikvah lady and she tried to make me feel comfortable. I dunked 3x until each was declared Kosher by the mikvah lady. She was there. It was after my divorce. My middle name is Esther, but my mother liked the name Kathleen.
I love your attitude of inclusion and acceptance for all people who are just trying to celebrate their relationship with God without worrying about getting things "right".
Aww thank you so much 🥰!
I wish Christians had something like this, this would appreciate this process
I feel a little jeleaus and sad, beacuse im havent the opportunitie of this beautiful practice of mikvah and i feel inside of me that is so necessary to my body, I have 2 miscarriages and 29 years old :( well ... the key to pregnat are of Hashem... sorry to my bad grammar, es muy calido el contenido de tus videos me gusta mucho, ojala pudieras enseñar un poco mas sobre la femeneidad, labores femeninas y todos esos temas primordiales para las mujeres, saludos desde Aguascalientes, Mexico .Lorena!
I'm so glad to hear that you have found my videos helpful, and no worries about your grammar that's so amazing that you can write in English and Spanish! I am so sorry that you have suffered two miscarriages, that is heartbreaking and my heart goes out to you.
The attendant needs to watch if you're going after finishing being niddah. She needs to make sure not one hair was out of the water or maybe you clenched you hands and didnt realize it. Otherwise it wasnt kosher. For 9th month pregnancy, you dont need a kosher mikvah immersion. I dont even think you make the bracha.
I think the mikvah lady was there because Esty was seen as an orphaned outcast in her community. They probably assumed she didn't know the rituals like 'good Jewish people.'
Your comment is absolutely atrocious and totally false. All orthodox mikvaot have a mikvah lady. She is there to make sure that all your hair and the rest of you is completely immersed. Also to make sure you don't have any loose hair stuck to you. All orthodox Jewish girls who are engaged have lessons with a teacher to learn all the laws of mikvah. The Torah teaches us to take care of the orphan.
What’s your denomination in Judaism? And how much Hebrew does a convert need to know to be able to convert?
I’m Conservative! I believe that depends on what denomination you want to join.
My Jewish Mommy Life can I ask what conservative Judaism is and how it’s different from Reform Judaism as it’s the denomination I want to convert to? Would a reform Jew need to know Hebrew and if so, how much?
@Beth, I attended schooling first because that is the requirement of many congregations before being accepted as Jew. The cost of tuition fee is $1000+ and a final exam should be taken so that they can inspect whether you got enough knowledge to be accepted as Jew.
I am Muslim and I really appreciate the mikvah ritual , I wish there were a place to practice it where I am from . Next time I am near a running water I will try to apply the mikveh rules to get closer to God . I think mikvah especially after periods heightens ones femininity and makes you accept the "hardships"that come with it including period and pregnancy . Love from Tunisia ♥️💜 . May I note we have one of the largest Jewish communities in North Africa and I am proud of the diversity in my society . Thank you for helping me learn about your wonderful religion
That is such a beautiful perspective and comment, thank you so much for sharing! Yes I have read so much about the Tunisian Jewish community!
Perhaps the title of this should been "Unorthodox vs. what mikvah should be...... I have heard Esty's account from many people who left Hasidic groups. Humiliation is another way of maintain control of an individual .
There were two other mikvahs in Unorthodox that might be missed. The first was when Esty took off her wig and went under the water . Purging from from the past and purified for the future . The second time was Yanky who took off his closes and jumped in the water and asked G-d to help.
You are right though , the Mikvah is personal and very spiritual . It's a shame that it can be missed used in extreme groups.
You also mentioned men's mikvah which most people do not know about ; not even the ones who know about the women . There are a lot of people who only know about mikvah that involved around a woman's reproductive life.
Thank you for pointing out the two other mikvahs, I didn't think about Yanki's in that way!
I think that was Moshe.
It's a beautiful to go to the milvah it's a private matter not should be on the internet and Facebook
Do you have an Instagram page
I do! instagram.com/myjewishmommylife
I honesty feel like in unorthodox they made it look uncomfortable and bad where as in real life it is cleansing and a very spiritual experience
How different is real Judaism to unorthodox?
Jewish Family what I meant was what the difference between the unorthodox movie and the real religion I was just curious.
What is a female doesn't have menstruation for months?
we only go to the mikva if there was menstruation or any vaginal bleading from the womb. A pregnant woman doesn't need too. Nor does a women after menopause.
One point that’s missing, men use a Mikvah too. Although not as part of the niddah laws. Also reform and conservative Judaism don’t follow the same rules as orthodox or chassidim . Sometimes you need to explain more.
You're right yes I only spoke about female customs and you're right I should explain more!
Reform is not considered Jewish. Hence the name "re-form".
Can only Jews go to the Mikva? Or can a Christian go too?
My sister had experienced it in Israel even though she was a Christian.
You guys need to respect Deborah Feldmans, and the other girls who shared their experiences with writers, who helped produce this series. Times have changed, but regardless, these are their experiences. You having a different one doesn't invalidate theirs.
I knew unorthodox was talking smack when i watched the preview.
Just a heads up, your experience is different from others. what may be traumatizing to one may not to you. don't discount others experiences
Very true! I encourage anyone who didnt have a positive mikvah experience to search for another option, check out the Mayyim Hayyim website!
As a Christian, I found this very informative. I can see why you found it so special. We practice baptism by full immersion on conversion only. A rite like Mikvah can still be helpful even for non-Jewish worshippers of Hashem.
Love this connection!
I think it’s creepy you can’t touch your husband because you are “Unclean or Dirty) how dare they teach their daughters that
Hope it expands to allow single women to use it
You can definitely go to the mikvah as a single woman! Check out the ones listed on the Mayyim Hayyim website for a good starting point.
You need to be Jewish to use the Mikva
Thank-you for dispelling the errors about Jewish rituals..... Movies such as Unorthodox try to cast an OPINION into Judaism which does not represent the Truth about Judaism... and then millions of people watch the misleading program and are forever misinformed.
Judaism is a beautiful religion and truly, our lives are outlined in Torah which is actually the First Five Books of the Old Testament: Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers and Deuteronomy.
Granted, specific details might not be there but, all of the rules definitely are, along with the reason why we do it...because our Gd says to do it. Pretty basic reason.
You are opening understanding and removing the mystery.
I'm Seventy-Four years old and I have studied the majority of the world's religions.... and, I come home to Judaism because it is beautiful to me, and, Judaism is Spiritually fulfilling....
Unfortunately, some false things have been said and lies have been told about Jews, and your Vlog is important to show non-Jews that we are normal humans who love our Gd and who love the rituals which are attached to each of our daily life events.
I am a practicing Kabbalist which is, in itself, a uniquely enriching experience.
Thanks again for removing the Shroud of Mystique that distorts our Jewish reality in the eyes, and minds, of others.
May you be well.
Shalom.
Unorthodox was in my opinion complete BS. I can point out so many things that were outright WRONG, the Mikvah experience being just one of them. I get this was from her point of view, but it seems like it was very much colored by her own feelings rather than actually reflecting the true experience in most Jewish communities. My Mikvah experience has always been peaceful, comfortable, and something I looked forward to.
You forgot to mention that going to the mikveh is something they make you do in Judaism. I was made to go before my wedding and I hated it. It's degrading and disgusting.