It was so touching that you decided to put off doing something that could possibly benefit you and your dysphoria out of concern for the financial well-being of your family. I hope and pray that there's some miracle in the future (all-inclusive health coverage?? or lottery...) that enables you to pursue all available avenues for making your body match your mind.
I definitely feel/have felt pretty much everything that you said in this video. I often wonder where I would be if so much of my life would have not been taken up with transitioning. It consumed my life for so many years before I transitioned and I still spend a lot of time on it now. I had the job of my dreams out of college, but gave it up to be with my partner and to transition. i can go back to it but even though I feel so much more comfortable with myself I feel like I have lost (cont...)
I don't think you'll ever completely get over the grief of everything that you've lost as a result of who you are. But I think it's part of who you are, and I think it makes you a deeper, more compassionate person.
I have been thinking a lot lately about these same things. How my life would be different if I were born cis-male. Actually, I JUST posted a video about it yesterday :P However, you are much better at articulating then I am. Congrats on 3 years!
So many things in life involve a mourning process. In nature, what does not change dies. I think people can stagnate too, but it is healthiest when they don't.
(cont...) a lot of the courage, drive, and passion I had to go out in the world. I would think it would just be the opposite, but that's the way it is. Now that I have transitioned I find myself wondering what I do now. Do I go back to school or find a new hobby. I think things will get better when I live with my partner again (who is teaching at a university 2 hrs away). We will move this summer to wherever accepts her for her PhD. I'm glad I am trans for the experience, but it's not easy.
It was so touching that you decided to put off doing something that could possibly benefit you and your dysphoria out of concern for the financial well-being of your family. I hope and pray that there's some miracle in the future (all-inclusive health coverage?? or lottery...) that enables you to pursue all available avenues for making your body match your mind.
I definitely feel/have felt pretty much everything that you said in this video. I often wonder where I would be if so much of my life would have not been taken up with transitioning. It consumed my life for so many years before I transitioned and I still spend a lot of time on it now. I had the job of my dreams out of college, but gave it up to be with my partner and to transition. i can go back to it but even though I feel so much more comfortable with myself I feel like I have lost (cont...)
I don't think you'll ever completely get over the grief of everything that you've lost as a result of who you are. But I think it's part of who you are, and I think it makes you a deeper, more compassionate person.
I have been thinking a lot lately about these same things. How my life would be different if I were born cis-male. Actually, I JUST posted a video about it yesterday :P However, you are much better at articulating then I am. Congrats on 3 years!
So many things in life involve a mourning process. In nature, what does not change dies. I think people can stagnate too, but it is healthiest when they don't.
(cont...) a lot of the courage, drive, and passion I had to go out in the world. I would think it would just be the opposite, but that's the way it is. Now that I have transitioned I find myself wondering what I do now. Do I go back to school or find a new hobby. I think things will get better when I live with my partner again (who is teaching at a university 2 hrs away). We will move this summer to wherever accepts her for her PhD. I'm glad I am trans for the experience, but it's not easy.