Caroline Myss - The Curmudgeon (The Power of Archetypes)
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- Опубликовано: 15 сен 2024
- Hi, Everybody -
It's time for another archetype. Today we're going to do the curmudgeon, and I'm sure every one of you knows one. But before I launch into this particular archetype, I want to remind you about what an archetypal pattern is all about, what we're all about.
An archetypal pattern is a pattern of power. And we channel our life force into these patterns. Unconsciously. And these power patterns have long-running narratives that go back centuries and channel into the collective unconscious. We select certain archetypes we identify with, each containing an archive of stories, myths, legends, etc. These archetypes are our contract, who we are on our life journey, and their patterns are how we manage our power.
Now what is a curmudgeon? A curmudgeon uses tactics to stop the flow of harmonious energy. Nothing pleases this person-absolutely nothing. So we're going to get into what makes a person a curmudgeon.
Thank you, everybody. I'll see you next week.
Love,
Caroline
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About Caroline Myss:
Caroline Myss is a five-time New York Times bestselling author and internationally renowned speaker in the fields of human consciousness, spirituality and mysticism, health, energy medicine, and the science of medical intuition. Caroline established her own educational institute in 2003, CMED (Caroline Myss Education), which offers a diverse array of programs devoted to personal development and draws students from all over the world. In addition to her written work, Caroline maintains a rigorous international workshop and lecture schedule and has produced more than eighty audio/visual products on subjects that include healing, spirituality, personal development, and the study of archetypes.
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I have a brother who is like this 100% of the time. He lacks insight into himself. He never takes responsibility for his actions. This was his established personality in our family and everyone just put up with it. He says hurtful things and does unkind things. He is a huge blamer. We are estranged. I have never felt so at peace in my life.
Absolute perfect description 😅I was raised by one. And that's how my "people-pleaser" archetype was born 😂
Thank you SO MUCH for GIVING these informative conversations on specific archetypes❣️ it is like having a key to the doors of perception. Completely resetting my life to live with my mom (70+^, post divorce) has been a REAL BREAKDOWN of PAST empowerment(s)/ego. As our COMMITMENT is to GRACE & LOVE & SUPPORT for each other, it has been a “care runs both ways” situation. My own health issues (w/ Endometriosis/PMDD) & following my mom’s path directly to lead a cancer free life has been challenging, but it is my goal to RE:invest in strengthening ourselves from the inside, so that we can BEGIN AGAIN/CONTINUE to CONTRIBUTE to our individual self, community connections, & our collective unconscious. I am on your mailing address for awhile now, but it is these YT videos that I feel the most drawn to & enjoy receiving! Thank you SO MUCH for making them AVAILABLE to the community. Right now this fits my budget.
Thank you.
Love the statement that it's about that the power of empowering someone is a way to channel Grace...that's just Beautiful.
This archetype has caused me to lose my best friend of 40 years. I cannot continue befriending someone so bitter and controlling . I was always careful not to disturb the peace and yet peace was constantly fractured.
I always love a good Caroline "STOP THAT!" A curmudgeon is that way because it's the only power they feel they have and it's a means of controlling a situation or other people. It's easier to tear down than to build up, and another pay-off is that they get to feel superior. They're also great at saying "I told you so." And they are never, ever wrong!
Yep good analogy . Yes I completely agree with the point that the person feels powerful by being nit picky carmudgeon
I have to express how much I appreciate this series of videos! Thank you Carolyn, your work is so inspiring❤
I’m so glad you gave a name to what when exhausted I become… not pleasant, but a clear sign that I have neglected myself for too long. The feeling of being completely drained of energy after dealing with a group of people for longer than I should, makes me seek solitude to recharge myself…
This archetype series is pivotal, key learning today! Thank you!!
It was so interesting to hear about not having an archetype in your day to day life but having it show up in your system during certain times. It reminds me of the terminology in Internal Family Systems, which puts all of our archetypes into 3 categories: managers, firefighters, and exiles. Manager archetypes show up in meetings, dinners, when were not triggered and making a good impression. Firefighters get activated when the exiles are triggered. The exiles carry wounds and they make us behave in damaging ways often. The firefighter comes in to feed us something soothing, makes us want a cigarette, or tells someone off to protect the exile. Its all about quelling and protecting the root issue.
I really appreciate these videos, I think Im really understanding these power patterns better and better. And I listen to these while I do dishes and it takes my mind off of not liking to do dishes😊
I also listen to these while doing dishes & cooking lol, takes my mind off feeling like an "indentured servant" to a large & demanding family household 😅
START loving it. The feeling of the water 💧 😌 We may not have it for long. And if it's hot and soapy and drinkable, consider yourself really privileged. 😮😂❤🥰🎉🙏🏻
@@susancarolan153😻😻🩵
The Curmudgeon archetype can dovetail into narcism it seems. I have a person in my life that is a definite curmudgeon but when I've brought their traits up as you suggested they can't handle it. It's difficult. I hate being around it.
Yes the two are quite a dúo
Never heard of that term, but spot on as always Caroline. In Egypt we have a saying that perfectly describes this trait "Someone who halts the sailing boats"... and I know many of those 😁
I loved your direct but loving way to say “we love you but stop it”.
Thank you for these Archetype teachings. Outstanding 😊
Caroline… you are awesome, you create so much healing, awareness, spiritual teachings over the years. One of my hero’s…. You are for me. I love your books, your generosity! So many thank you’s galore.
How honest of you to share your curmudgeon tendency. Based on the situation, it seems to me that your reactions are perfectly understandable.
My dad was one. I have to be conscious. So, it’s almost an automatic reaction and you have to stop yourself. I have to stay to myself when I’m over tired because it’s worse then. Brain has to be retrained.
What a sublime explanation of this overlooked archetype. Thank you!
Well said Hali and thank you and bless you for your wisdom.
I so look forward every week for your archetype pointings. Thank you, love, light, joy and gratitude to the world
I need these instructive videos. I was raised by very damaged parents so I've spent my life trying to straighten out my thinking. Thank you.
Love your work. The curmudgeon seems like a variety of narcissistic behavior. Narcissists rarely compliment others unless they are manipulating you for something they want. Empaths are very sensitive to the energy of others, and your Sun (& Mercury) is in the 12th house of Pisces, the most sensitive of all signs. You were just protecting your own energy.
Thank you Caroline for your work as always on the Archetypes!🙏this fantasy projection of the knight/damsel is oh so common still in modern day online dating. I would like to add that this dynamic is also manifesting blatant Narcissistic abuse via self-delusional victims willing to give away their Power to a "Knight in shining armor" aka an energy vampire. I feel this Archetype is definitely related to the Vampire, because as you said Caroline when we are depleted of energy, the Curmudgeon can come out. Disempowered people whom are incapable of generating positive energy use constant critique as a Power grab move for certain!
I totally relate to you having a finite capacity to be with people before needing time alone to recharge. Another valuable insight. 🙏💗🌺
Ive noticed my ex is a hero archetype. He was surprisingly there for me in my worst time (even tho he triggered it as a narcissist ) then i realised i have to STAY a damsel in disrress. He would never cope with a damsel that becomes a strong goddess. I see the women he looks at or prays on and they're all the same, troubled and very weak and insacure
You put it so right. The fairytale is the picture he makes of both of you. You have to stay in that role. Otherwise you gett to strong . And not to be saved by him anymore
Thanks as ever for your insights! What you’re describing is a violation of your boundaries. It doesn’t happen suddenly, it’s just that you suddenly realise it is happening and the anger you feel is actually anger at yourself for not doing what you really need to do. I see that as a different issue than the curmudgeon archetype who seems to need a lot of attention 🙏🏻
I always called them gloom and doom archetype. Love your perception of how they are actually controlling, or trying to anyway. They do put a dampener on a situation. Sad, that this particular dark side just takes over their life. Funny, I had a fantasy most of my life about my first love, which wasn't real at all. It was like the wounded child playing make believe and nobody could fill those shoes, it was self sabotage, Caroline. Thanks to teachers like yourself, through prayer, I am healing. I am learning to love myself and others, honestly. I've decided to take my whole soul with me, this makes sense.
I'm really enjoying all of the videos on archetypes ...Just wanted to say that phrase "what's in it for me"...as "icky" as it may sound... is something I had to "learn" to ask myself. Some of us have always naturally believed in "a rising tide lifts all boats", but I can't even begin to tell you how many people have almost insisted that I be more selfish...almost to the point that I've felt I was being "blamed" for "inviting" bad behavior from others.
I have never felt that I am "gullible"...I just grew up in a time when we could trust that "most people" weren't looking to exploit every opportunity to serve themselves...but it seems things have changed. I have had to learn to ask myself what my "backup plan" is before extending any trust that my "common courtesy" will be reciprocated.....and have even found that blatantly "asking" what's in it for me is almost "necessary" to signal self-respect.
I don't like this any more than you do, but I feel it's just an adaptation to what our world has become 😔
I love you workshops on the Archetypes also !!!!!!!!!!!
Can any of us of a certain age ever forget the curmudgeons surrounding Pollyanna in the town she came to live in with her stern aunt Polly - Mr. Pentergast (am I remembering that name accurately?) and Mrs. Snow in particular who disliked children and didn’t want any of their material possessions touched and the miracle of Pollyanna not being rebuffed by their gruffness. She just keeps advancing with her boundless curiosity and love of life.
Brilliant, Thankyou very much, I have never actually heard that word before ! I love these archetype videos 🤍🕊️
I work with one of these types. Every single thing... always has to say something negative. Can't stand to be around her. This episode is so helpful!!!
I'm wondering how this correlates with Narcissism. Narcissists have to always have control.
I'm like the plane also - too much stimulation being around people for an extended length of time, I have to go home and lie down immediately. Introvert.
Wow curmudgeon, this is a new word for me. I did not know the word for this not picky just never agreeable never satisfied always correcting personality type. Great video
I do the crash thing; When I realized it I refocused on self-care, boundaries, and was like duh, you know better 🤭🤦🤷😁
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💜 Raquel 💙
E Raquel MUTS
LOV#the new glasses!
🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 Thank you Caroline
I love how you explain this word!
Perhaps I just have a strong Savior complex, but I posit that the Curmudgeon is just severely wounded. That they need encouragement towards therapy, not being shamed into stopping because they are annoying.
In general, when we speak, we reflect who we are (our struggles and experiences), not anything true about another. So nitpicking someone else’s story with irrelevancies isn’t about bringing down the other person, or trying to sour anyone else’s experience. I posit that it’s about the Curmudgeon being so wounded and feeling so unseen and unheard that nitpicking with irrelevancies FEELS like being heard - because when we’re annoying we ARE noticed!
I suspect they aren’t capable of seeing, or perhaps caring, the annoying aspect. Curmudgeons nitpick even when they ARE the center of attention! But when you’re that wounded, you just can’t see, because at that stage, nothing is enough.
I’m a Savior and know that I can’t heal a Curmudgeon. But if I did love one, I wouldn’t say, “I love you BUT stop it you’re being annoying”.
I’d say, “I love you. You are so valuable. But in your life you haven’t been seen enough and valued enough for how wonderful you are. I want you to feel the valuation you should have had. I think you’d benefit so much from trauma therapy. (Explain trauma therapy.) Can I help set that up for you? Would it help if I went with you the first time?”
Success is obviously not guaranteed. But I just wanted to add this viewpoint to the conversation.
❤
I hear you and agree. Thanks for adding your compassionate perspective. I forget that sometimes... "Compassion first" really is how I want to react in life.
I'm thinking about the look on my favorite curmudgeons face if I were to look her in the eye and say what you suggested! Ha! *Jaw dropped*
Yes, there are ways to steer them...
Not so much with a narcissist who I believe are the worst of curmudgeons, as they just can't allow any sort of energy that would imply they aren't right, but I think the average "Debbie Downer" curmudgeons would cease the behavior if their real needs were met via therapy, etc. 🙂
SO TRUE
Can you talk more about how to stop the “what’s in it for me?” patterns?
I got a feeling I behave/think that way more than I would like to accept.
Thank you!
Once again Caroline picks up and identifies and critiques an archetype .. very interesting and thought provoking. Thanks Caroline 😊
Thank you for sharing this wisdom. I have two people in my life that are like this, they are never satisfied with anything or grateful for anything. This explanation of the curmudgeon archetype has helped me to shift my perception of it. Thank You! Also, synchronistically speaking... I was just thinking about how important it is to tend to our own energy needs with healthy boundaries. and how most people may not even understand the topic unless they are in a similar spirit based work-purpose. I can relate to your experience of losing energy and focus with hugs when you are doing work that requires you to be in and maintain an elevated zone/state. For me, it's experiencing an in-between.... what's above.... and the energetic needs of all present ....that creates that flow you are attuned within.... once it is brought down with physical contact, ugh, .. it's gone. very draining! Anyway... Thank You, Thank You, Thank You Caroline... for sharing your grace.
Yes
I am learning well.
To cover myself in spiritual coconut oil like Mooji says.
So the green banana of social situations washes off with ease.
Oil, Water keeps my cleanse/renew/begin once more maintenance going.
Loving your teaching style.
My building is good, thanks.
🖤❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜🤎🩶🤍
Thank You, Caroline.
Thank you so helpful. I find this trait comes out in me when I am in large gatherings and I have to separate myself to recharge. Sharlene
OoooHHHH! that hit home. I want to be adopted ! I fantasize about my future husband and his family. Especially his mum who will be the mum i never had and so desperately want !
TY Caroline***Knowing/understanding my Archetype patterns, are so important in helping me, see how I am reacting!! :)
Thank you Caroline 💫
fascinating indeed - thank you
UGH thank God I finally have a name for people who do do this! I had assumed it was just a form of attention seeking.
Brilliant so revealing . Thank you Caroline.
🙏🏽 thank you for this video
YES. All of this, 100%. Thanks, Caroline.
Maybe a curmudgeon just sees fault in every one and everything because they are so critical and at fault with themself? I find the more secure I am with myself, the less it matters how or where we go and even what the other person thinks. I just let it be so that the time is congenial. Unless I'm out of energy, then I'm better off not even going. We need to be happy seeing people happy. 👍
I love these archetype videos.
This was very enlightening and someone I don’t want to be. Thank you 🙏🏻
I love your archetype videos, super fantastic thank you
thank you for bringing up the topic.
Men…they want to purchase me. Not my job to light their flame or be their buffer.
Thank you, Caroline.
I saw myself in the outlaw, and a few others rang true, but this one jumped out as needing the most attention.
What a terrible habit I have had, was somewhat aware of, but now determined to stop it by starting to go with the flow. And truly, what could be better. After all, that's why I found this channel, because I wanted and needed to improve my lot, our lot, the lot of it, but with generosity.
I come from a family of curmudgeons, in which nothing was good enough, and the consequences of not tweeking everything to our parents' wishes were violent, and it made me hyper vigilant to 'imperfections 'everywhere and everywhen. Very uncomfortable for everyone involved.
Thank you Caroline, 💜🌸
Please do workshops again. 🥰 Thank you!
This was good 🙌🙌🙌 thank you!🙏
I’ve never heard the word “Curmudgeon “ before! 😮
There’s a term in the shadowy part of the men’s movement called ‘negging’ which is used as a way to control women.
I live with one
Me too…
I was married to one of these. Absolutely exhausting.
Those who feel unheard tend to try for that last word. Looking for permission or someone to blame?
WC Fields? ( his film characters)
I noticed Im like this on shops when they don’t have what I need. I’ve got to stop it because it’s borderline rude.
Thank you
Truth! The curmudgeon dampens harmony and flow. It’s just awful.
It is difficult to have been raised by a curmudgeon. Now I know how to be one.
My Dad was one , my siblings all followed the pattern , I married one , all dismissed out of my life now and what a difference it makes.Miserable gits .
Often, and I need to just stop, but I find myself catering to this archetype in an effort to keep the peace or get back to that harmonious energy when in a group. I've observed the curmudgeon really finds an outlet of expression in those who feel entitled and those who are pessimist. Reminds me a bit of Cruella De Vil, and on that note to the curmudgeons I think, Anita are they serious?
I’ve never heard of that term before
This is me 😮 I want to compliment people but I can’t
That is totally my mother - to a T( and yes, it is painful to be around, awful)
Please- where did you get your awesome glasses??❤
I had two of these in my life. Now that I've amputated them, I can laugh!
I call them my "here-too-short and there-too-long" people. Goodbyeeeeeee...
Funny thing, they were born within 10 days of each other.
I think I may be one 😅😅😅😢
Is suicide a sacred contact that some people have or are they just lost from their souls? I know this question doesn’t pertain to your talk but I’m curious bc I know 4 families who lost children.
Hi! I’m not CM answering you but I have two ppl in my life that made that decision. My younger step brother and my former husband. Both of them were absolutely gorgeous, talented, loving, gift of gab, and impactful men. Both of them had a serious secret shame demon that wouldn’t let them enjoy their lives.
I feel that suicidal people offer the gift of evolution that occurs in the people who survive, the people they leave behind who turn to religion, counseling, ascension, Reiki, renewed and deepened patience, a new and more profound reference point- it’s all those things and so much more. It opens the hearts of those who have to live on. I’m not CM answering you with the gifts that she has to speak and teach. I would be very interested in what she says on this topic. This is my opinion on it. Shine on, shine as brightly as you can.
Thank you for sharing. I feel that as well about the lessons their choices create. I would love to hear what she has to say too.
Curmudgeon, I'm singing the song 🎵 🎶 Somebody I used to know by Gotye 🙌
Could your curmudgeon come out when you need protection?
Any and all archetypes may manifest if you feel you need protection.
Like the West Side Curmudgeon from will & grace haha
Caroline, you’re looking stunning and so gorgeous as always ❤ ♥️ 💜 💙
Ok I’ll stop curmudgeon-ing!!! 😅
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Sounds like my boss 🤦🏾♀️
Unfortunately this is me 😣😞
My mother! Hahaha omg….
that is my mother
Can we change our archetypes, or be a few at once?😢❤😂🎉
⚖️🖤💙💚💜❤️🧡💛🤍🪶
So tired of this old princess empowered by her prince, coming at me in the workplace.
they are the patriarchs and the harassers. A throne via interest in everyone's personal life and giving your unwarranted opinion's, because you are too afraid to and did not make your own soul or life.
Wow...
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