Thank you so much. My husband was killed in a car accident last year and I'm supposed to be fine. Also-- dealing with people who want to "help" but actually despise me cuz I want to talk about things.
@@recoveringsoul755 unfortunately, I think that means it's up to us; what we learn, we help nourish in each other and all the life students who come after. This is why my liberation depends on yours and vice versa: our healing heals. 🙋🏻♀️
Yes... but there is LESS to carry around, stinking up my world when I start chipping away at it. I used to be so sad that “I didn’t catch on years ago,” but I’m realizing it’s only now that I’m able to face the extreme fear & severe discomfort that I have to “sit in” as I process through all of it. (Most of my years were spent trying to numb myself from all those awful feelings... I did not know that the only way through the awfulness is to keep going forward, sometimes quickly, but usually slowly, until I see the light on the other side of it... Then, a break and then time for the next😅 But as I look at those I’ve worked through, they never hold the same weight as they used to... as I glance back from time to time, I see the millions of strings being snipped, one at a time, and feel freer each year. And I used to think, “if I were healthier, like some lucky other people, I could make a better contribution to this world... but, now, I’m thinking, “ What I’m willing to do, facing the massive fear, etc, may actually BE my great contribution... and I am able to give a helping hand at times to others when they are willing. Each of us can make a difference for good, but what that difference is looks totally different from each other.
I'd say it's more like a russian nesting doll (Matriyoshka) Layers upon layers of defence mechanisms and traumas and all that's left is a little doll on the inside when you're done.
You aren't aware of the state of our society if you don't realize how the world is filled with broken children, broken adults in denial, and familial abuse of children growing up now. This is so painfully true. Children are not born monsters they are almost 100% of the time become this way as a result of their upbringing. If you don't think gang members had awful childhoods you haven no idea what your talking about. If you think violent criminals would have turned out that way if they were raised peacefully you have no idea what your talking about. Abuse isn't just awful for the victims who do not commit crimes later in life. Abuse in childhood has consequences that lead to dead bodies, destroyed dreams, and prison. More that sinks in the more the pervasiveness of the parental abuse you faced disgusts you.
@@tonywright8342 The truth is many people do not want to admit or accept what their parents did was wrong. They justify abuse as discipline. They say no only was it ok for them it is ok for the ones it is being done to right now. They justify child abuse to hold onto the idea that their parents have done no wrong. The truth is many more parents than anyone wants to admit have done great harm. And acceptance of the wrongdoing is always the first step.
My step-mom is a narcissist and I feel real bad for my dad being so innocent in the whole thing. She’s said some terrible things to him to get what she wants it’s so sad
This is what ticks me off about self-help. Too many of those guys never healed properly. It's just easier to say you're too sensitive or too subjective or too defensive or should just get over it or just stop taking things so hard and blah blah blah. And I can tell you I have hardly any allies to help me. I pretty much have to live in silence. I sucks.
You aren't too sensitive, what you're feeling is completely normal. You are loved by people who understand you, you don't know it yet but these people do exist.
It's so difficult as a woman when you've been sexually traumatized by someone. It's hard to even find a person you think is safe to talk about it to. Even therapists and psychologists really don't know what to say. And I believe it can be traumatizing to a woman in some ways to have to see a gynecologist. I don't believe they should let men be gynecologists, I think that should only be a career choice for women to handle.
It’s traumatizing for a man to be sexually abused by someone to especially if that someone is your own mother and no one wants to even believe you when you try to say something. Because mother’s don’t molest their own children.
I was feeling bad about myself not healing quickly from childhood trauma. I’m 63 and am still clearing it up. Thank you for this video. I’m doing the work and will probably be doing the work on my death bed. But I’m doing the work. That’s huge! ❤
It is a lifestyle indeed. Perfect way to look at it. Like making the conscious decision to eat well. It’s a forever decision. A grateful heart helps too. My father had a very challenging young life. He was a much older parent, more like a grandfather. He was traumatised indeed. Extreme poverty, orphanage, sexual abuse, WW2. In the afternoon of his life, had made peace with his early life. I watched him enjoy music so intensely, it moved me to tears as a child. He taught me about gardening, and the art of doing nothing. Just sitting and enjoying. Please give people a message of hope. The human spirit and it’s abilities to endure inspire me everyday. Lead with love ❤️
Sometimes I feel that I just can’t bear to realise fully and deeply HOW MUCH trauma we have in the world. How much suffering everyone has inside. It’s just heartbreaking and in a way I’m not accepting this world as it is. It’s hard to live with your eyes and heart open. Too. Much. Suffering. Everywhere.
I have been working on my own trauma for about 40 years now. Daniel is the only person I have come across in that time that actually gets it. I have only recently discovered him. Thanks so much to Daniel.
The real trauma resides in the denial of trauma---everyone just needs to put "it" behind them and get on with their lives. Bad strategy. No processing. No healing. We are created to sustain and learn from trauma but that isn't how we are living because we have been conditioned to be hyper-fearful of anything uncomfortable so therefore it s impossible to grow under such circumstances and indeed lack of growth is in itself traumatic for the psyche.
I love these so-called Trauma specialty modalities that literally have the therapist refuse to emote and connect, interrupt the trauma survivor to tell them to calm down and breathe and basically make it easier for the therapist to listen to them. A grotesque practice.
I loved how in another video you talked about how much you cried with the people you served, being human and not afraid of your own feelings,it’s such a taboo,it is considered overidentifying,crazy!,,
The only therapist I've come so far that actually speaks the damn truth and understand. It's a lifestyle, lifetime healing process. Be honest even if you are outcasted for it no matter from who. You will be happy
Daniel, you may feel like a lone voice in this sick society, and that's true to some extent, but never forget that you have thousands of anonymous viewers like myself (and hopefully people in person too) who appreciate your brilliant mind and candid analyses of this critically overlooked issue. Your content is helping me a lot. Cheers, my friend🥂
I'm just understanding how I'm being controlled and gaslit by the people who have claimed to love me most. I genuinely have wondered what's wrong with me because I can't remember but a few things from my childhood. As I see that I have been used for narcissistic supply and I see the patterns with clarity I am connecting with my inner child, having these flashbacks. I'm actually suppressing them because I can't fully accept this notion that I wasn't truly loved.
It's okay to move slowly. If you fear an absence of love, find ways to love yourself fiercely. Who gets your humor better? Who will be with you every day? There's a lot to love, I'm sure of it. Start there. Seeds gotta have ground before they can grow strong. 💛
Thank you so much Daniel. Every word you said is TRUE. I thought I was the only one that saw this in the world but, like you have had to keep it quiet because speaking up has caused so many people to have melt downs. I wish other professionals had your intelligence and maturity-the world would be a better place. I feel better knowing you know as well and I'm not alone.
Ikr. I wish I could've seen him as a therapist. I have been re-traumatized one way or another by every therapist I've ever seen and there's been a lot. I've given up on finding a therapist to help me.
I massively agree. I have been looking for answers the most since 17 and I healed so much (23 years of active interest in what it really means to be a human), but I basically lost everyone in the process, again and again, as people either didn't believe the vastness of my traumas or would only re-traumatise me or invalidate my truth and my needs all the time (because of their own traumas, too, of course). The invalidation and the constant distrust and doubt of others almost killed me. I survived only because I fought for myself (and that felt like the most outrageous thing to do). I could have been evolving only because I stopped wishing for anybody to be honestly happy for my healing. It was hard and sad but ultimately liberating, too. But - we are so complex as humans, that even though I healed so much and I consider myself healed (and having a million techniques and approaches to resolve all that could come), to see from such standpoint that the whole society functions on exploitations of all possible human traumas and that true heath and freedom is somewhat a fiction, and traumas of all kinds are a natural ongoing experience here on this planet... I wonder how much deeper I will have to go if I want to feel strong and unaffected... and should/could that be even a goal... I would love to feel it can be a goal...
Yes Daniel, all the parents are causing trauma to their children to some degree. It's a truth that we live in a 'stronger over weaker' society, bosses over their employees, richer over poorer, and so on. Unfortunately, there's this vicious cycle...if we are traumatized by our parents, we are more likely (especially if we are not aware of it) to let other people treat us the say way. Which in turn means we will never get out of this cycle. The answer is, 'Face your fears'!
And if we can't see it, we also replicate the offensive behavior in ways we can't permit ourselves to see either. Those young parts of us still need safety, nurturing, and permission to grow wild - that's where all the magic lives. ✨
Evidence. Show me evidence that “all parents” cause trauma. Unless your definition of “causing trauma” is some imperfection of parenting that applies to every human since the beginning of time.
Really liking "making lifestyle out of healing traumas" phrase! :D and as of being alone, I remember when you said that it's a pity people don't talk that much publicly about traumas and inner work. If more people were discussing it out in the open it would be easier to do this healing work. So I started talking publicly about traumas, inner children and the need of inner work :D and I noticed it really has some impact. And it's thanks to you, because you inspired me :) so thank you! ;) wish you all the best.
I am your ally, I have been for years speaking for that "people at what ever age, when they are hurt as children, they STOP GROWING EMOTIONALLY at that age...the result is PEOPLE that look/appear to be adults act at the age that that they were hurt. By the way If you encounter a person smoking, drinking excessively, etc WE ARE THE PEOPLE THAT YOU SPEAK OF!!! Thank you SIR. Therapy is the key.
I agree in a way but also have an opposite perspective. A huge part of my traumatization was that I believed that healing was hopeless and impossible and that I was going to be stuck with all my problems for the rest of my life. It was a crucial process for me to come to the realization that it actually is possible to permanently heal traumas and that it also doesn't have to be super difficult and/or take a very long time. I then experienced just that a couple of times about 10 years ago which completely changed my perspective on life. Then with time, after the initial euphoria, I also realized that things went much deeper, just as you say. But for me, the realization that traumas doesn't have to be such a huge deal is still the much more important realization.
What a perfect summary in a single sentence "parents are given a pass".. so true! It is still a wide spread belief that it is ok to create children in order to meet some (often unconscious) need or interest of the parent, or to fit them into what the parent wants. This is massive normalised abuse. I dare not imagine the trauma that is being collectively created on children in this period, with social distancing, lockdowns, and other rules that deprive children even more of their basic needs and humanity! Also so true how society generally does not support true healing and becoming conscious, and therefore true inner evolution is quite a lonely journey.
Sometimes the herd just takes you far from truth. Daniel is a clear example of the idea that not every effort is made better by adding more people to the mix.
Had my share of childhood trauma, recovering with great progress on my own. I strongly disagree with your attitude. Nature is beautiful but it’s also traumatic and harsh at every step; trauma is as much a part of human heritage as trees and snakes. Trauma needs to be reckoned with, not as a good or bad thing, but simply as something that was and is, and integrated into how we live our lives. If you run from trauma, you will be running your entire life; and if you hyper-fixate on trauma, it becomes a religious worship of suffering when you should be focused on living. Dealing with my trauma has helped me wake up; but what helped me more than anything else was to reconnect with the world and other people; to forgive humanity, in a way, and move on. Mackler, your videos were a great help to me 2 years ago when I started taking my recovery seriously; it was the jolt I needed to tackle my trauma in a conscious and intentional manner. But as of late, I feel your rhetoric is stagnate. Blaming everything on my parents is accurate but it is no help to me; at every turn, blaming my parents always makes me feel less valid, like I am just their mistake who is doomed to their mistakes. What pulls me out of this pit, every time, is understanding my parents, realizing why THEY did what they did (rather, why they didn’t do what they should have), so that I can have the power to decide differently; to learn how to be better, rather than using them as an excuse. There is so much we agree on but there’s something crucial here that I feel needs emphasis: your trauma is not you, and your trauma is not God. Trauma is just something that happened; and your chief concern is, what do you WANT to happen next? When I feel lost, I often zone out a bit, and, rather than imagining some fictitious character or sex, which is what I used to do chronically; instead, I imagine me, in the future. What future is a future I find attractive? And in that attractive future, realistically, what am I doing in my daily habits to maintain that future? I then snap back to, and try out those attractive-future-me habits on my immediate surroundings, and I find meaning again, even in mundane job tasks. And in my attractive-future-me, I do not see me sitting in the middle of the woods still blaming my dad for not looking at me enough; I see me, looking at my own kids, and seeing that they are good. That’s what gets me up in the morning. Self-pity has never made me do anything, ever. Your trauma is real, that much I can see. But only you decide how real your potential is.
Thank you for having the courage of walking the path of the truth... cause thats really what you are doing! You are not the only one that see the world with this vision, just know, you are not alone! And the fact that you talk about it really gives reassurance and peace of heart to the ones that are seeking for their true self too.cause deep down what you say really resonates with the true essence of our being and it’s healing! I know the harder times can feel really lonely and pointless but you also got to enjoy the most powerful feeling of what it is to love life and yourself and to feel truly complete. You are strong and I’m sending you lots of love☺️❤️
I'm with you on the totality of trauma. I once had a moment when I had connected to that totality for the first time and cried. Now I just beat myself up less as I've come to understand that I'm not the only one who feels the things I do..the whole world is awkward and self conscious with a dose of toxic shame
Childhood trauma. What does one do when there is an unconcious split and irretrievable traumatic experience/memory that is directing a dangerous situation in the present. Our unresolved traumas are like magnets. It is a life and death situation. Time is of the essence. Thank you for your important work 🌟
Recognizing the trauma I experienced has been one of the hardest things in my life. Like you said there aren't many people who will talk about it with you so it just makes getting over it a lot harder than it should be. When I do get the chance to share I just feel like I'm just such a messed up person and that it will eventually push that person away.. It's not fun but its getting better as I learn to process things myself slowly and sometimes with close friends.
You’re right Daniel I’ve been studying myself for 10 years its a lonely path and its unending process, the whole uneducated psych-education masses is sickening its why some psychologists i trust still think humanity is in its infantile stages , a traumatized infantile with a false self which is raising so many narcissists and psychopaths and false empaths , your words on how each one of them on his death bed gets his false self stripped from them caused me almost a poetic feeling from how beautiful your description is and how accurate it is I actually introjected it but will always remember its your words , i think my most used defense mechanism was introjection .... I introjected so many ideas and concepts to the point of not knowing who am i it was ego shattering , i had my doubts about forming DID but it wasn’t that , it’s just a way to hide my true self which im exploring on this year through my Complex ptsd and im not self pitying I’ll grieve and ill keep my boundaries from this world and ill be vulnerable with the people who deserve to be vulnerable with I just wish if u would talk about introjection even more its a very deep topic to me and i wish you a good day
Dan, My recovery efforts have spanned many decades (as of the time PTSD was introduced) and I have fortunately been able to shovel much of it away. There was never anyone to talk to, not even counselors or psychologists. You provide a way for me to imagine I have someone to talk with. Thanks for your relevant. insights
You're most certainly not alone Daniel. In the context of who watches your videos. I don't think you realise how valuable your work is. You're so good at talking about the 'elephant in the room'. You're a pioneer. Thankyou 🌹
Great video! Thank you Daniel. Doing my little healing journey. There is one apparent contradiction that raised my attention: not to give a pass on parents traumatizing their children, and not, as a therapist alerting the justice system. I agree that the therapist is not part of the law enforcement and there is some judgement about pushing the red button with all the consequences that would arise. What should we do then? Having more intel on people's lives at home where privacy is of such paramount importance ? We need laws that protect children and these laws need to be enforced to help. Perhaps it's the sanction that would arise that might me even more traumatizing: kids taken from their parents being in a foster family that could also abuse the children... I'm willing to dedicate my life to protect children from any harm and abuse. It is certainly a society's problem too. Thank you for this great video. Let's keep up the fair fight. Take care all.
This exact phenomenon has become a crisis-level obstacle to my familiar ways of survival. The healthier I get, the more present in my experience and my senses/body, the more I see of the illness in... e v e r y o n e and fresh boundaries don't yet know how to enter society with health. A transformative crisis, to be sure, but gosh if I could have some social stability that would be a nice change of pace.😑 Now I'm just practicing non-reactivity. Useful but exhausting without peer reflection. I see you! Fwiw 🤷🏻♀️
A seeker and speaker of the truth. My desires have always been about understanding the truth about myself, others, society and the unknown. I long for connection with others who are also learning this language. Thank you, Daniel.
Yes!! This is exactly how I have been feeling. Especially after the pandemic. Of course we need to continue moving forward, but without even mentioning the horrifying traumas we’ve all collectively just experienced? Much less the personal trauma we each carry. We’re not allowed to feel anything. We’re expected to produce all day and drink/scroll away our emotions at night. But what I love about these videos, you talk about reality and hope equally! We live in a real dystopia, but we can handle it. We are all hurt and stunted mentally and emotionally, but we can heal and grow. We can help make things better for others.
We can make things better, I got into the whole trap of trying to use social media to numb myself out after covid, it didn't work, and now i seek more genuine healing
I've been surrounded by people who haven't supported me most of my life. After my covert narc mother passed away, even my mother in law told me she loved me the best she could. In my opinion, this type of gaslighting is an entire generation refusing to take responsibility for their neglectful parenting. RUclips is the only place I have to feel validated, thank you.
It wasn't my parents that traumatized me. It was PUBLIC SCHOOL starting with kindergarten and all through to high school. Then I spent the rest of my life trying to heal from the effects of school. BTW EFT does work, but many practitioners if not most lack the skills to get to the roots. That is when I first started seeing real and permanent change for the positive in my life. It is true when trauma is resolved life improves across the board. That is when we see how much it has held us back. Speaking up about this gets me thrown off "healing" forums. Often I remain quiet. I have been threatened to be excommunicated from churches for saying the truth, hard as a try I'm not being "saved", that their religions are misleading them into the victim mentality and depending upon others to "save" them. Yes, church doctrines and the leadership therein have also traumatized me. Then to top it all off, I married a very selfish, egotistical, gaslighting and abusive woman. Those were the worst traumas of all. I'll use the word narcissist because that pretty well tells the story . Life used to really suck, until I started facing my traumas and working my best to overcome. Life is so much better and I will never go back to the bad old days.
But many must be on this lonely path, right? Wouldn't things be so much easier if we just came together? But I suppose even with finding people who share your experiences one with such intense trauma is bound to feel lonely at times...
Thanks for this. I always tell people traumas are invisible wounds, and there is no way to fully identify, let alone heal such wounds. It's a lifetime attempt.. The therapist him/herself is wounded in diverse ways, trying to heal a client wounded in diverse ways.. It rarely turns out right!
The amount of pressure put on people to keep smiling ie not be honest about how awful they feel is a huge problem. The worship of happiness is a major factor in bad decisions, most of the time. Give yourself permission to feel how you feel. It is what saves sanity. Mental hospitals are full of those who had to keep smiling, no matter what.
One thing I'll say with full honesty is that two of the most important things that catalyzed my personal growth into realizing this stuff were a close friend-family group that understands this stuff (if, in some cases, they don't, they do once I make them aware of it and clear up any confusion or misinterpretations), and psychedelics. Had I not had psychedelics as one of my many tools, I truly believe I wouldn't have broken from the mold I did until at least 5-10 years later. People say a psychedelic experience is like years of therapy rolled into one day/night. Well, it's very self-evidently true if you know what you're doing in there and you integrate properly without biting off more than you can chew; and the part they don't say aloud is it's worth the progress of years and years of slow, painful, ineffective therapy condensed into one day/night. I'd say more accurately that it's got the potential to be about equivalent in help to a few weeks to months of good therapy in one night, if you know how to use these tools properly. I see these plants and fungi (entheogens) as gifts from Nature/God/Source to remind us that Consciousness and existence do not start and end in the physical world (which I know firsthand from Astral projecting out of my body completely without any of these compounds in my system) and that there's always more to reality than we can suppose, BUT they are absolutely not for everyone. I've seen the damage reckless usage can bring firsthand (well, secondhand since I wasn't there when it happened, but I heard the horrific story from my friends).
Thank you so much for this! I'm becoming a psychologist and your videos are more illuminating than a lot of my syllabus - and also a lot of the therapy I've received myself.
YES! To everything that was said. I want to add.. Trauma is treated as an inconvenience in this society. We are expected, all of us, disabled or not, to be productive members of society and produce money. What is valued is productivity. This is why they try to make us '' recover'' as fast as possible with meds. Trauma can go soooo deep. The more you dig the more you find. And it runs so much of people' s lives but they don't wanna face it. People think if you have a job and have those things that on the surface make you seem like a well integrated person, then they are fine. They think if they aquire things like a job, a partner, a family, etc, then it means they made it in life. They mistakingly chase those things thinking those are markers of a successful completed life and they don't need to do anything else. They think those are markers of a healthy well adjusted person. People don' t realise how they are unconsciously running away from their traumas. They think they are living well, and the ones who faced their traumas are dramatic. When in fact, what they are doing is covering up abuse, trying to keep their illusion alive just so they don't have to deal with the pain.
I wonder that traumas from parents are due to the effort they make to (rightfully) control the situation. Raising children, who have ideas of their own, in a difficult, hectic world... I know of no parent who sets out to traumatize a child... I write this as a person with CPTSD.
I have faced my own trauma in the past five years. The only reason I did this is that I was forced to - I saw the true face of my narcissistic parents in the flesh, unmasked. The pain and panic of having the truth of my life - what I and others have done - has been beyond what I can take. I am alive today only because I am substance free and have a job, economic stability, a sufficiently normal spouse, and children at home for whom I am responsible. I am also a reflective person by nature. In other words, I have the optimal circumstances for recovery. But it’s still not enough. I needed and still need a lot of luck. And I don’t know where I’m going or if I’ll get there. My siblings are not as fortunate as I. One is still lost in the cloud of pain and the other seems cast in a state of permanent fragility. As far as I can see, I agree most people live with trauma. But the pain of healing is too great for most. I do not see how people are going to be able to do it. Even if you are forced into starting, the process is so long and painful that it is too much.
As far as I'm aware "trauma" for Psychologists involves the threat of death, for diagnostic purposes, andrelates to PTSD. Other trauma causing repeated memories etc is "Adjustment Disorder".
Thk u for verbalising this, Daniel. Little do u know, u hv spoken out for people like me too.... I also find it difficult to share with anyone now.... Totally alone, like u said... And I agree with u too, that this is a lifestyle.... Hv been doing this since I was a kid, and I'm 50 now.... Stil ongoing... And yes... People in my life do not understand why I'm still where I am in spite of all the years of healing I hv undergone.... And u hv given the answer for that.... Thk u again... Nice to know, out there, there are actually Many who are experiencing in one way or another similar stuff ike me... In that way, we are not alone.... Thk u once again... God bless..
You are 100% correct. Parents often do get a pass. Also teachers often get a pass, too. I think it’s because we all recognize that those are difficult jobs but traumatizing other people is sad.
There's one thing about this take that I disagree with - partially. Traumas can be completely and thoroughly healed, but yes, it can't be done without really digging deep into everything about what you've been through. If you have PTS"D", (shock trauma), it can be completely resolved on a deep, physiological basis (Peter Levine's work has taught me this), and a person can go from being in complete ventral vagal shutdown to being socially engaged, out of the freeze response, and renewed... but this can't be done without becoming deeply in touch with your body, and a person also must deconstruct the cognitive lies and betrayals they experienced, returning to self compassion. It's a purging, integrating, and transformative process... but you're right; everybody in modern, armored society is traumatized by LIVING in society alone... healing trauma is an inherently radical process and it seems that we all agree here on that aspect of it. (The idea that being in the transient state of trauma is somewhat of a permanent fixture is an idea I like to debunk when I can. I think it's entirely possible to not be in a traumatized state any longer, as a truth of nature, but it's true; armored society dissociates, sabotages, and puts so many caps and restrictions on that! So actually... I don't think I'm in any disagreement at all... you yourself believe traumas CAN and MUST be healed, and you are both in depth and real about this process, unlike mental health professionals and society at large... so consider it a small addendum, but not necessarily even a counter.) Then again... I think of stuff like birth trauma and abandonment in early childhood, or problems in brain development that stem from trauma... I genuinely am not sure about that! It makes me wonder what kinds of trauma can and can't be resolved. I know some can be, even if a tremendous amount of digging, effort, feeling, learning, and reconstructing is needed... but how far is the reach...? (My philosophy is also about honoring and being in tune with what it means to be your "wild" and original, instinctual self. I want so badly to be freely in touch with this, to be unarmored and uninhibited vs. armored and controlling. But just how far CAN it go, if you have limitations on how much truth you can speak in the confines of society...? At least you can know it for yourself. But lacking the freedom in so many ways/suppression must have traumatic consequences...! Here I am, thinking out loud in the comments section. Anyway...)
Hey Daniel thank you so much for these videos I sometimes feel so alone too on my healing journey I know exactly what you mean by how deep the hurt n wounding is.. I feel so alone sumtimes.. But I'm so happy I discovered you I feel like there someone out there who Knows the realness of what is really going on and isn't afraid to say it.. I feel like i have a friend in you even tough I obviously don't know you and vice versa but I feel like I've found my tribe in a way if you were here.. Lol.. Anyway thank you damp.. Thank you.. E.. X.. x.. ☺️
I would like to be an ally for you, Daniel. Of course, it's easy to say such things in RUclips comments. It doesn't make it a lie, though. You are an ally for me, albeit via RUclips. It's not meaningless at all, and my thanks are sincere.
Have you seen the tree that grew up through the chain link fence that seemed impossibly in the way? Growth patterns in nature are my new hero. Pay no mind. Our job is to never cease reaching towards the Maker. The sun warmth.
When Grandma had a hartattack, babysitting me when i was 5, it was very traumatic, but their was no agression against me! I spend 7 month in the hospital before i get my first Birthday I see the overprotection that followed and hugging to kill very harmful and abusive Words can hurt! The vocalized order to get in the Train to Poland in the 40's did killed people!
What is trauma? Is there a mechanistic way to relate to it? Is there an analogy that fits the way you see it, that one maybe could connect to how one might heal? Is it broken connections? Is it like wires being pulled out? Overload? Can you see it when it happens? It’s so invisible to us. Is it simply when … something really, really bad happens to you? Something so bad you cannot take it? I’ve noticed myself shaking lately during times of thin skinned angry sensitivity, that’s gotta be trauma, is it always like that? It’s like my entire perceptual system is not synchronising. Is that a thing, synchronising? Isn’t that what bonding is? What abandonment destroys? Maybe I’m reaching but when I stare ahead and really look sometimes I wobble in the strangest way. Even with patience I’m not sure it stitches itself together, not sure what to do. Something must have happened to me. It’s like shell shock I guess
In my experience you can dissolve trauma from the body. I believe this is something routine that humans have forgotten the need for. I view trauma the same as 'wear and tear' on our systems. It's an inevitable part of living and experiencing life. I think we have made it a big to do about nothing because we don't hold space in the world for people to acknowledge and separate their experiences from their personhood. Trauma work to me is about clearing those stuck experiences out of the body and the psyche so people can have the freedom to choose who and how they want to be and what they want to have. And when I say much a do, I dont mean people are being cry babies and need to get over it.. i mean that because we dont allow space for people to say this happened and impacted me in xyz way... we weirdly treat natural occurences of life as dirty secrets, blame and shame others and ourselves (this is a thinking point, but what the point of blaming and shaming your parent for not being able to do things they never learned how to do - remember there was no google etc. back then- what do we hope to gain? Mostly acknowledement, attunement, and legitimization of our pain and experiences think about how hard it is to do that for yourself... and think about the shame a parent will feel for letting their child down in the worst way possible.. abd worse to see all the parts of yourself you hate and have tried to bury staring back at you.) The disappointment and grief etc is valid and all part of the experience, but in the end we have to be a little bit thankful we live in an age where we can easily access content like this at our young age, some people are in the later decades of their lives just finding thos stuff out. And sometimes when we know we forget what its like to not know.
This excludes anyone with Big T traumas. If you have suffered at the hands of those meant to protect and care for you. Your environment failed you in the worst way. My heart goes out to you.
I watch/listen to quite a bit of true crime where the victim is either missing or killed. Most of the time, the narrator excuses the parents (when applicable) for behaviors that are so obvious to me to be neglectful and abusive. A story I tried listening to yesterday was about a 15 year old girl who was found dead in a dumpster. The story went (according to her mother) that the girl led an ordinary life up until shortly after her 13th birthday, then suddenly she became rebellious, started hanging out with the 'wrong crowd,' started doing drugs and turning to prostitution. The mother used the phrase 'free spirit' and 'she liked to do things her way.' I had to turn it off. It made me sick to listen to these adults. The mother didn't even look all that shook up. Her 15 year old daughter was found dead in a dumpster ffs. The uncle was more pissed off about the fact that the teenagers friends were saying that she'd prostituted and did drugs, than he was about the fact that she was freaking dead!!! It disgusted me. I had to turn it off.
I'm glad I'm not alone in thinking that kind of thing is disgusting I've had to be a lot more careful with the kind of media I watch nowadays because it often end up leaving me feeling triggered because of our evils thar we so often overlook.
i think thats really important to look at when wanting to understand society. especially in the context of colonialism and intergenerational and vicarious trauma. thanks for making it all a bit more understandable.
Stunted. I was am a 5yr old child in the area of sex or intimacy. Every man I ever had sex with inadvertently became a violator during any sexual interaction. It took me a long time to identify this 5yr old was always there watching, being hurt.
People don't understand. Molestation is about the power dynamic of taking away someone's innocence. I hear the rate of female molesters is rising. I also feel the only safe people to talk to about what happened is others who have experienced similar.
I really don't understand that aspect of male culture. We reduce a male's humanity differently than we do females. What people call normal is just some subhuman version of ourselves. I really have no idea how to heal. I only strive to feel safe and find intimacy within myself. A place of respect for my heart. Nature helps. 🌹
Heather Whitehead. You said nature helps you heal. Does writing (journaling) or talking here about your traumas help you process what actually happened? I think it helps me to "get it out". Even a small amount of release unpacks and unburdens me. I don't expect ppl to understand the full extent of my traumas or their effects, nor do I expect others to fix things. I want to lessen any addiction I have. When I get emotionally upset, I eat to soothe, but it's only temporary. It's not a true resolution. I'm aware and validating myself, and wonder if another person can truly give one validation. To what degree can others assist another in becoming whole or no longer traumatized? I wish you well.
@Dunston For some reason Daniel blocked me even though I commented for the first time on this channel tonight. He probably didn't like the name of my channel "Pro Male Revolutionary".
I hope your perspective on this has changed since you made it, I noticed you put a lot more stuff out that sort of instructs people on how to create a life which fosters grieving. Hopefully we can all develop this thing so that we know how to make it only take a year or two of someone's life, not decades.
I so feel the same way about the isolation and the stigma around trying to bring out the issues.Even people with a wish to do well try to bypass dealing with what is really going on!
Hey Daniel, I love your work. I'm curious, have you ever read the philosophy of Nietzsche? I see so much of him in your work. Just curious, and keep up the good work
When I was watching this video, my mind kept saying: "Daniel, your biggest ally is the Buddha:)" you have revealed the wild secret of this human realm - everyone is traumatized and everyone is trying to run away from their traumatized feelings to a certain degree. and yes, I am afraid that is the basic fundamental truth of human beings. I have heard a lot of people's comment about the Gautama buddha: he is too negative, he is too pessimistic, he sees sufferings everywhere, even the most seemingly happy person. But Bingo! thats how it is.
The crickets are distracting. But it would help your argument if you defined trauma! It is also relevant that bad things, tragedies, disappointments, and undermined expectations happen to everyone, but not everyone suffers from PTSD. There is clearly a relationship between an individual's sense of capacity while those with personality disorders tend to already have poor coping that makes them particularly vulnerable to become further undermined by threatening outcomes.
We learn to live with our traumas, aren't we? I grew into a culture where, at least when I was a child, I heard a lot that children must fear their parents in order to obey and respect them, and beating the child as well as the wife, was brought from heaven, and one should bit them without reason so should be in peace and with no worries. Talking about an insane world... I also believe people with no traumas don't exist. Thank you for your videos ❤
Hmm, I partially agree and partially disagree. I agree with that we cannot ever fully heal and know how we are affected. There's always going to be a shadow. I disagree with that we cannot appreciate nature, be in relationships, have children .. there still can be life, and joy, and love, and why not embrace imperfections and some pain? Awareness is key imo, and no; sometimes, that is not enough for being joyous. But we should not wait to be healed with our lives. We should heal and live at the same time. Maybe that's not possible sometimes. Then, we have to be patient and forgiving. Be okay with imperfections. I do love the fool's journey in Tarot. It is so holistic, and has forgiving elements. Shadow and light live side by side in that.
Not everyone is! I don’t ageee We talk about the extension that made someone helpless. I did so many experiences in life and they didn’t make me feel helpless and then I got an illness where it wasn’t easily diagnosed and took time and I was in all alone and so many medical checks blood tests etc all on my own and that was and became the milestone of my life- beginning of something difficult where I was left out. That is helplessness and that was that T. Then I agree that these techniques in the system help ..
what about childhood-trauma and the society around the family ? When society puts pressure on parents, to function by special ways, that can be bad for the child. Or think of partly very problematic things going on in school and kindergardens like bullying. Or when a parent is - for whatever reson- in struggle with a criminal structure, all that can worthen the fate of a child. In contrast, the more love and respectfull kinds of care parents find in society, the more they could realize, what they have to change for becoming good parents.
Daniel, how can everyone be traumatized? It's too generalized of a term, surely. I agree that everyone is traumatized to some degree, but that 'some degree' matters - it matters in that some people need more help than others. To say everyone is traumatized negates the people that are seriously damaged, doesn't it? Some trauma surely has to be heavier than other trauma?
We’re forced to conform in a largely traumatized population (large scale wars affecting millions of parents/bosses/coworkers/friends) trauma has been normalized to burry it and figure out how to get by in a traumatized society by being shut down in many ways.
I feel you 2999999 percent facts!!!! So I don't know what stage really I'm in fact all I know is I'm working on me and becoming Genuinely happy and it is soo lonely and everyone EVERYONE looks and treats you like your crazy..!!!!hard at times to keep going!!! And stay grateful and keep love for everyone that's has and is hurting you.....but I know I do sleep better when I do decide it time for bed.....
I tend to agree that that trauma work can be a life long pursuit. I wonder what you think about NLP being used to create new neural pathways when trauma is triggered. Can triggers be lessened/got rid off by, what some would call, consciousness hacks?
Thank you for letting me know this. I wasn’t sure if there were ads or not on my channel. I made a decision a long time ago not to monetize the channel. But people were telling me that RUclips puts ads on all channels nowadays regardless of whether they’re monetized or not, and then people tell me that if RUclips is making money off my channel then I should too. But in my heart I don’t want to make money off this healing channel… So I still have not monetized it.
Would be worth to mention the diffrence between simple PTSD (usually one-off eg a car accident) and complex PTSD (usually interpersonal, chronic/repeated). Simple PTSD usually failry 'easy' to treat.
I think that parents don't get a pass, especially mothers, but that people think of trauma as part of the experience. Not knowing that this is a very very variable output. So in the name of abutting that parents also had trauma, maybe even worse then they inflicted, the adult children are not really welcomed to blame their parents. I think this needs to be forget reconsidered and explored 🙏
Thank you so much. My husband was killed in a car accident last year and I'm supposed to be fine. Also-- dealing with people who want to "help" but actually despise me cuz I want to talk about things.
♥️
@@bernadettebockis4120 thank you
a shortage of good listeners these days
@@recoveringsoul755 unfortunately, I think that means it's up to us; what we learn, we help nourish in each other and all the life students who come after. This is why my liberation depends on yours and vice versa: our healing heals. 🙋🏻♀️
@@sloaneglover1026 It's good to know there are thoughtful, caring people in the world. Thx to all of you!
I'm also on a path of healing trauma. It's like once you've opened Pandora's box, it never ends. There's always more to heal.
I know the feeling... It can be very overwhelming. Let's take it one step at a time, OK?
@@ryk6207 Yeah, that's what I do. I've been doing this for years so I've got most of the worst of it sorted.
Yes... but there is LESS to carry around, stinking up my world when I start chipping away at it. I used to be so sad that “I didn’t catch on years ago,” but I’m realizing it’s only now that I’m able to face the extreme fear & severe discomfort that I have to “sit in” as I process through all of it. (Most of my years were spent trying to numb myself from all those awful feelings... I did not know that the only way through the awfulness is to keep going forward, sometimes quickly, but usually slowly, until I see the light on the other side of it... Then, a break and then time for the next😅 But as I look at those I’ve worked through, they never hold the same weight as they used to... as I glance back from time to time, I see the millions of strings being snipped, one at a time, and feel freer each year. And I used to think, “if I were healthier, like some lucky other people, I could make a better contribution to this world... but, now, I’m thinking, “ What I’m willing to do, facing the massive fear, etc, may actually BE my great contribution... and I am able to give a helping hand at times to others when they are willing. Each of us can make a difference for good, but what that difference is looks totally different from each other.
“What I’m willing to do, facing the massive fear, etc, may actually BE my great contribution... ” 💖💖
I'd say it's more like a russian nesting doll (Matriyoshka)
Layers upon layers of defence mechanisms and traumas and all that's left is a little doll on the inside when you're done.
I feel alone in this too.No one seems to understand.And everyone would prefer to be in denial
They are good therapists out there but its just finding them.
same
@@salvatoreclappsy4580I have 💩 insurance it’s sooooo hard to find a good one with limited options already in a small town 😭😭😭
You aren't aware of the state of our society if you don't realize how the world is filled with broken children, broken adults in denial, and familial abuse of children growing up now. This is so painfully true. Children are not born monsters they are almost 100% of the time become this way as a result of their upbringing. If you don't think gang members had awful childhoods you haven no idea what your talking about. If you think violent criminals would have turned out that way if they were raised peacefully you have no idea what your talking about. Abuse isn't just awful for the victims who do not commit crimes later in life. Abuse in childhood has consequences that lead to dead bodies, destroyed dreams, and prison. More that sinks in the more the pervasiveness of the parental abuse you faced disgusts you.
Precisely. Thanks for sharing.
Yes you are so right in what you say.🌈
@@tonywright8342 The truth is many people do not want to admit or accept what their parents did was wrong. They justify abuse as discipline. They say no only was it ok for them it is ok for the ones it is being done to right now. They justify child abuse to hold onto the idea that their parents have done no wrong. The truth is many more parents than anyone wants to admit have done great harm. And acceptance of the wrongdoing is always the first step.
My step-mom is a narcissist and I feel real bad for my dad being so innocent in the whole thing. She’s said some terrible things to him to get what she wants it’s so sad
This is what ticks me off about self-help. Too many of those guys never healed properly. It's just easier to say you're too sensitive or too subjective or too defensive or should just get over it or just stop taking things so hard and blah blah blah. And I can tell you I have hardly any allies to help me. I pretty much have to live in silence. I sucks.
You aren't too sensitive, what you're feeling is completely normal.
You are loved by people who understand you, you don't know it yet but these people do exist.
Same here, you’re not alone, we’re just outnumbered…
It's so difficult as a woman when you've been sexually traumatized by someone. It's hard to even find a person you think is safe to talk about it to. Even therapists and psychologists really don't know what to say. And I believe it can be traumatizing to a woman in some ways to have to see a gynecologist. I don't believe they should let men be gynecologists, I think that should only be a career choice for women to handle.
It's WORSE when you're male.
@@unblockablemale1367 Pipe down, jerk-o.
100%
Yes the "woman's exam" felt violating to me. And I didn't like having to be seen by a male but said nothing and tolerated it.
It’s traumatizing for a man to be sexually abused by someone to especially if that someone is your own mother and no one wants to even believe you when you try to say something. Because mother’s don’t molest their own children.
I was feeling bad about myself not healing quickly from childhood trauma. I’m 63 and am still clearing it up.
Thank you for this video. I’m doing the work and will probably be doing the work on my death bed.
But I’m doing the work. That’s huge!
❤
I am a parent to myself teaching my inner child that I am loved, whole, and complete.
Self-parenting is the most beautiful alchemy 😊
Your future children/family will thank you for it :)
I am your ally, Daniel. If you ever need to talk about trauma or whatever, I'm right there with you.
It is a lifestyle indeed. Perfect way to look at it. Like making the conscious decision to eat well. It’s a forever decision.
A grateful heart helps too.
My father had a very challenging young life. He was a much older parent, more like a grandfather.
He was traumatised indeed. Extreme poverty, orphanage, sexual abuse, WW2.
In the afternoon of his life, had made peace with his early life.
I watched him enjoy music so intensely, it moved me to tears as a child. He taught me about gardening, and the art of doing nothing. Just sitting and enjoying.
Please give people a message of hope.
The human spirit and it’s abilities to endure inspire me everyday.
Lead with love ❤️
Wow! Touched me deeply.
“The art of doing nothing”
“Lead with love”👍👍
We all need to hear these messsges. ❤
Sometimes I feel that I just can’t bear to realise fully and deeply HOW MUCH trauma we have in the world. How much suffering everyone has inside. It’s just heartbreaking and in a way I’m not accepting this world as it is. It’s hard to live with your eyes and heart open. Too. Much. Suffering. Everywhere.
Very true👌
I have been working on my own trauma for about 40 years now. Daniel is the only person I have come across in that time that actually gets it. I have only recently discovered him. Thanks so much to Daniel.
The real trauma resides in the denial of trauma---everyone just needs to put "it" behind them and get on with their lives. Bad strategy. No processing. No healing. We are created to sustain and learn from trauma but that isn't how we are living because we have been conditioned to be hyper-fearful of anything uncomfortable so therefore it s impossible to grow under such circumstances and indeed lack of growth is in itself traumatic for the psyche.
very well said
I love these so-called Trauma specialty modalities that literally have the therapist refuse to emote and connect, interrupt the trauma survivor to tell them to calm down and breathe and basically make it easier for the therapist to listen to them. A grotesque practice.
I loved how in another video you talked about how much you cried with the people you served, being human and not afraid of your own feelings,it’s such a taboo,it is considered overidentifying,crazy!,,
Exactly! I feel so stressed when I'm not growing and learning because I feel I'm just rotting away slowly...
@@Pinwheelsystem Exactly!
The only therapist I've come so far that actually speaks the damn truth and understand. It's a lifestyle, lifetime healing process. Be honest even if you are outcasted for it no matter from who. You will be happy
Daniel, you may feel like a lone voice in this sick society, and that's true to some extent, but never forget that you have thousands of anonymous viewers like myself (and hopefully people in person too) who appreciate your brilliant mind and candid analyses of this critically overlooked issue.
Your content is helping me a lot. Cheers, my friend🥂
Thank you, Daniel! Yes, it’s lonely. And I feel a little less alone because of your videos. I hope you feel some kinship from them, too!
We can feel less lonely... Together.
I'm just understanding how I'm being controlled and gaslit by the people who have claimed to love me most. I genuinely have wondered what's wrong with me because I can't remember but a few things from my childhood. As I see that I have been used for narcissistic supply and I see the patterns with clarity I am connecting with my inner child, having these flashbacks. I'm actually suppressing them because I can't fully accept this notion that I wasn't truly loved.
It's okay to move slowly. If you fear an absence of love, find ways to love yourself fiercely. Who gets your humor better? Who will be with you every day? There's a lot to love, I'm sure of it. Start there. Seeds gotta have ground before they can grow strong. 💛
Me too
Thank you so much Daniel. Every word you said is TRUE. I thought I was the only one that saw this in the world but, like you have had to keep it quiet because speaking up has caused so many people to have melt downs. I wish other professionals had your intelligence and maturity-the world would be a better place. I feel better knowing you know as well and I'm not alone.
Ikr. I wish I could've seen him as a therapist. I have been re-traumatized one way or another by every therapist I've ever seen and there's been a lot. I've given up on finding a therapist to help me.
I massively agree. I have been looking for answers the most since 17 and I healed so much (23 years of active interest in what it really means to be a human), but I basically lost everyone in the process, again and again, as people either didn't believe the vastness of my traumas or would only re-traumatise me or invalidate my truth and my needs all the time (because of their own traumas, too, of course). The invalidation and the constant distrust and doubt of others almost killed me. I survived only because I fought for myself (and that felt like the most outrageous thing to do). I could have been evolving only because I stopped wishing for anybody to be honestly happy for my healing. It was hard and sad but ultimately liberating, too. But - we are so complex as humans, that even though I healed so much and I consider myself healed (and having a million techniques and approaches to resolve all that could come), to see from such standpoint that the whole society functions on exploitations of all possible human traumas and that true heath and freedom is somewhat a fiction, and traumas of all kinds are a natural ongoing experience here on this planet... I wonder how much deeper I will have to go if I want to feel strong and unaffected... and should/could that be even a goal... I would love to feel it can be a goal...
Yes Daniel, all the parents are causing trauma to their children to some degree. It's a truth that we live in a 'stronger over weaker' society, bosses over their employees, richer over poorer, and so on. Unfortunately, there's this vicious cycle...if we are traumatized by our parents, we are more likely (especially if we are not aware of it) to let other people treat us the say way. Which in turn means we will never get out of this cycle. The answer is, 'Face your fears'!
And if we can't see it, we also replicate the offensive behavior in ways we can't permit ourselves to see either. Those young parts of us still need safety, nurturing, and permission to grow wild - that's where all the magic lives. ✨
@@sloaneglover1026 yes, exactly! I totally agree :)
intergenerational trauma is one of the cornerstones of society
Evidence. Show me evidence that “all parents” cause trauma. Unless your definition of “causing trauma” is some imperfection of parenting that applies to every human since the beginning of time.
Hoping everyone has a great healing journey ❤
Really liking "making lifestyle out of healing traumas" phrase! :D and as of being alone, I remember when you said that it's a pity people don't talk that much publicly about traumas and inner work. If more people were discussing it out in the open it would be easier to do this healing work. So I started talking publicly about traumas, inner children and the need of inner work :D and I noticed it really has some impact. And it's thanks to you, because you inspired me :) so thank you! ;) wish you all the best.
Thank you for beginning to create a dialouge about this sort of thing, maybe we can build a better future if we become more open minded.
I am your ally, I have been for years speaking for that "people at what ever age, when they are hurt as children, they STOP GROWING EMOTIONALLY at that age...the result is PEOPLE that look/appear to be adults act at the age that that they were hurt. By the way If you encounter a person smoking, drinking excessively, etc WE ARE THE PEOPLE THAT YOU SPEAK OF!!! Thank you SIR. Therapy is the key.
no therapy is not the key lol
@@Dippmip It can be (or part of it).
@@Dippmip im curious as to what the key is terence.
I agree in a way but also have an opposite perspective. A huge part of my traumatization was that I believed that healing was hopeless and impossible and that I was going to be stuck with all my problems for the rest of my life. It was a crucial process for me to come to the realization that it actually is possible to permanently heal traumas and that it also doesn't have to be super difficult and/or take a very long time. I then experienced just that a couple of times about 10 years ago which completely changed my perspective on life. Then with time, after the initial euphoria, I also realized that things went much deeper, just as you say. But for me, the realization that traumas doesn't have to be such a huge deal is still the much more important realization.
What a perfect summary in a single sentence "parents are given a pass".. so true! It is still a wide spread belief that it is ok to create children in order to meet some (often unconscious) need or interest of the parent, or to fit them into what the parent wants. This is massive normalised abuse. I dare not imagine the trauma that is being collectively created on children in this period, with social distancing, lockdowns, and other rules that deprive children even more of their basic needs and humanity! Also so true how society generally does not support true healing and becoming conscious, and therefore true inner evolution is quite a lonely journey.
Daniel strikes me as someone who thinks long and hard and by himself. And he thinks well. There's nothing cultish about this person.
Fully agree
Seems like a thinker not a puker of the intellectual variety
@@eliascristante5306Love the word choice you used 😊
❤
Sometimes the herd just takes you far from truth. Daniel is a clear example of the idea that not every effort is made better by adding more people to the mix.
Daniel Macker does the most in depth videos on healing from trauma and parental abuse.
Had my share of childhood trauma, recovering with great progress on my own. I strongly disagree with your attitude. Nature is beautiful but it’s also traumatic and harsh at every step; trauma is as much a part of human heritage as trees and snakes. Trauma needs to be reckoned with, not as a good or bad thing, but simply as something that was and is, and integrated into how we live our lives. If you run from trauma, you will be running your entire life; and if you hyper-fixate on trauma, it becomes a religious worship of suffering when you should be focused on living. Dealing with my trauma has helped me wake up; but what helped me more than anything else was to reconnect with the world and other people; to forgive humanity, in a way, and move on. Mackler, your videos were a great help to me 2 years ago when I started taking my recovery seriously; it was the jolt I needed to tackle my trauma in a conscious and intentional manner. But as of late, I feel your rhetoric is stagnate. Blaming everything on my parents is accurate but it is no help to me; at every turn, blaming my parents always makes me feel less valid, like I am just their mistake who is doomed to their mistakes. What pulls me out of this pit, every time, is understanding my parents, realizing why THEY did what they did (rather, why they didn’t do what they should have), so that I can have the power to decide differently; to learn how to be better, rather than using them as an excuse.
There is so much we agree on but there’s something crucial here that I feel needs emphasis: your trauma is not you, and your trauma is not God. Trauma is just something that happened; and your chief concern is, what do you WANT to happen next? When I feel lost, I often zone out a bit, and, rather than imagining some fictitious character or sex, which is what I used to do chronically; instead, I imagine me, in the future. What future is a future I find attractive? And in that attractive future, realistically, what am I doing in my daily habits to maintain that future? I then snap back to, and try out those attractive-future-me habits on my immediate surroundings, and I find meaning again, even in mundane job tasks. And in my attractive-future-me, I do not see me sitting in the middle of the woods still blaming my dad for not looking at me enough; I see me, looking at my own kids, and seeing that they are good. That’s what gets me up in the morning. Self-pity has never made me do anything, ever.
Your trauma is real, that much I can see. But only you decide how real your potential is.
Agree 100%. Very well said!
I need Daniel have recently discovered him. As for the future I’m interested in now. Living in the now.
Thank you for having the courage of walking the path of the truth... cause thats really what you are doing! You are not the only one that see the world with this vision, just know, you are not alone! And the fact that you talk about it really gives reassurance and peace of heart to the ones that are seeking for their true self too.cause deep down what you say really resonates with the true essence of our being and it’s healing! I know the harder times can feel really lonely and pointless but you also got to enjoy the most powerful feeling of what it is to love life and yourself and to feel truly complete. You are strong and I’m sending you lots of love☺️❤️
True man deserves a ton of respect.
I'm with you on the totality of trauma. I once had a moment when I had connected to that totality for the first time and cried.
Now I just beat myself up less as I've come to understand that I'm not the only one who feels the things I do..the whole world is awkward and self conscious with a dose of toxic shame
Childhood trauma. What does one do when there is an unconcious split and irretrievable traumatic experience/memory that is directing a dangerous situation in the present.
Our unresolved traumas are like magnets. It is a life and death situation. Time is of the essence.
Thank you for your important work 🌟
Recognizing the trauma I experienced has been one of the hardest things in my life. Like you said there aren't many people who will talk about it with you so it just makes getting over it a lot harder than it should be. When I do get the chance to share I just feel like I'm just such a messed up person and that it will eventually push that person away.. It's not fun but its getting better as I learn to process things myself slowly and sometimes with close friends.
You're talking about things i don't hear other therapists talking about it. Thank you for bringing it to light
Bless your truthful wild heart Daniel Mackler 💕
You’re right Daniel I’ve been studying myself for 10 years its a lonely path and its unending process, the whole uneducated psych-education masses is sickening its why some psychologists i trust still think humanity is in its infantile stages , a traumatized infantile with a false self which is raising so many narcissists and psychopaths and false empaths , your words on how each one of them on his death bed gets his false self stripped from them caused me almost a poetic feeling from how beautiful your description is and how accurate it is I actually introjected it but will always remember its your words , i think my most used defense mechanism was introjection .... I introjected so many ideas and concepts to the point of not knowing who am i it was ego shattering , i had my doubts about forming DID but it wasn’t that , it’s just a way to hide my true self which im exploring on this year through my Complex ptsd and im not self pitying I’ll grieve and ill keep my boundaries from this world and ill be vulnerable with the people who deserve to be vulnerable with
I just wish if u would talk about introjection even more its a very deep topic to me and i wish you a good day
We may be lonely on this path, but we are not alone! We have each other, even though we'll probably never meet❤️
I don't know if you still use this account, but I'm here and I'm willing to talk.
Dan, My recovery efforts have spanned many decades (as of the time PTSD was introduced) and I have fortunately been able to shovel much of it away. There was never anyone to talk to, not even counselors or psychologists. You provide a way for me to imagine I have someone to talk with. Thanks for your relevant. insights
I feel just like like you about Daniel. 🌈
You're most certainly not alone Daniel. In the context of who watches your videos. I don't think you realise how valuable your work is. You're so good at talking about the 'elephant in the room'. You're a pioneer. Thankyou 🌹
He sure is a pioneer isn’t he, was just thinking that myself when I read your message.
Great video! Thank you Daniel. Doing my little healing journey. There is one apparent contradiction that raised my attention: not to give a pass on parents traumatizing their children, and not, as a therapist alerting the justice system. I agree that the therapist is not part of the law enforcement and there is some judgement about pushing the red button with all the consequences that would arise. What should we do then? Having more intel on people's lives at home where privacy is of such paramount importance ? We need laws that protect children and these laws need to be enforced to help. Perhaps it's the sanction that would arise that might me even more traumatizing: kids taken from their parents being in a foster family that could also abuse the children... I'm willing to dedicate my life to protect children from any harm and abuse. It is certainly a society's problem too. Thank you for this great video. Let's keep up the fair fight. Take care all.
I’m so grateful to have come across your channel! Never stop speaking truth. This information is so necessary.
This exact phenomenon has become a crisis-level obstacle to my familiar ways of survival. The healthier I get, the more present in my experience and my senses/body, the more I see of the illness in...
e v e r y o n e
and fresh boundaries don't yet know how to enter society with health. A transformative crisis, to be sure, but gosh if I could have some social stability that would be a nice change of pace.😑 Now I'm just practicing non-reactivity. Useful but exhausting without peer reflection. I see you! Fwiw 🤷🏻♀️
Things will get better in time, and if not, we'll learn to cope.
Your brain shuts down at a certain point of abuse.
When it comes back on line the trauma really starts.
Daniel I know you speak the truth. It's nice to have my knowing bolstered and not gaslit. Thanks sir🙏
A seeker and speaker of the truth. My desires have always been about understanding the truth about myself, others, society and the unknown. I long for connection with others who are also learning this language. Thank you, Daniel.
I speak of traumas all the time it’s good to “wake” people up
I need to be more like this.
My traumas make me unable to talk about traumas because I'm afraid of getting more traumas....
Yes!! This is exactly how I have been feeling. Especially after the pandemic. Of course we need to continue moving forward, but without even mentioning the horrifying traumas we’ve all collectively just experienced? Much less the personal trauma we each carry. We’re not allowed to feel anything. We’re expected to produce all day and drink/scroll away our emotions at night. But what I love about these videos, you talk about reality and hope equally! We live in a real dystopia, but we can handle it. We are all hurt and stunted mentally and emotionally, but we can heal and grow. We can help make things better for others.
We can make things better, I got into the whole trap of trying to use social media to numb myself out after covid, it didn't work, and now i seek more genuine healing
I've been surrounded by people who haven't supported me most of my life. After my covert narc mother passed away, even my mother in law told me she loved me the best she could. In my opinion, this type of gaslighting is an entire generation refusing to take responsibility for their neglectful parenting. RUclips is the only place I have to feel validated, thank you.
It wasn't my parents that traumatized me. It was PUBLIC SCHOOL starting with kindergarten and all through to high school. Then I spent the rest of my life trying to heal from the effects of school. BTW EFT does work, but many practitioners if not most lack the skills to get to the roots. That is when I first started seeing real and permanent change for the positive in my life. It is true when trauma is resolved life improves across the board. That is when we see how much it has held us back.
Speaking up about this gets me thrown off "healing" forums. Often I remain quiet. I have been threatened to be excommunicated from churches for saying the truth, hard as a try I'm not being "saved", that their religions are misleading them into the victim mentality and depending upon others to "save" them. Yes, church doctrines and the leadership therein have also traumatized me.
Then to top it all off, I married a very selfish, egotistical, gaslighting and abusive woman. Those were the worst traumas of all. I'll use the word narcissist because that pretty well tells the story .
Life used to really suck, until I started facing my traumas and working my best to overcome. Life is so much better and I will never go back to the bad old days.
It must of started in your childhood with your parents.
You are so right, Daniel. And yes, it is a lonely lonely path.
But many must be on this lonely path, right? Wouldn't things be so much easier if we just came together?
But I suppose even with finding people who share your experiences one with such intense trauma is bound to feel lonely at times...
Thanks for this. I always tell people traumas are invisible wounds, and there is no way to fully identify, let alone heal such wounds. It's a lifetime attempt.. The therapist him/herself is wounded in diverse ways, trying to heal a client wounded in diverse ways.. It rarely turns out right!
Hi Daniel, have you ever thought of using your platform as a forum for people to forms groups focused on healing traumas?
That would be nice
Like activism?
@@unblockablemale1367 Hopefully not! More like peer support.
There is one video where he explains why he is no longer a Therapist.
Wonderful! A timely topic in this day and age.
The amount of pressure put on people to keep smiling ie not be honest about how awful they feel is a huge problem. The worship of happiness is a major factor in bad decisions, most of the time. Give yourself permission to feel how you feel. It is what saves sanity. Mental hospitals are full of those who had to keep smiling, no matter what.
One thing I'll say with full honesty is that two of the most important things that catalyzed my personal growth into realizing this stuff were a close friend-family group that understands this stuff (if, in some cases, they don't, they do once I make them aware of it and clear up any confusion or misinterpretations), and psychedelics. Had I not had psychedelics as one of my many tools, I truly believe I wouldn't have broken from the mold I did until at least 5-10 years later. People say a psychedelic experience is like years of therapy rolled into one day/night. Well, it's very self-evidently true if you know what you're doing in there and you integrate properly without biting off more than you can chew; and the part they don't say aloud is it's worth the progress of years and years of slow, painful, ineffective therapy condensed into one day/night. I'd say more accurately that it's got the potential to be about equivalent in help to a few weeks to months of good therapy in one night, if you know how to use these tools properly.
I see these plants and fungi (entheogens) as gifts from Nature/God/Source to remind us that Consciousness and existence do not start and end in the physical world (which I know firsthand from Astral projecting out of my body completely without any of these compounds in my system) and that there's always more to reality than we can suppose, BUT they are absolutely not for everyone. I've seen the damage reckless usage can bring firsthand (well, secondhand since I wasn't there when it happened, but I heard the horrific story from my friends).
Needed to hear this. Thank you.
Thank you, Daniel, again.
Thank you so much for this! I'm becoming a psychologist and your videos are more illuminating than a lot of my syllabus - and also a lot of the therapy I've received myself.
YES! To everything that was said. I want to add.. Trauma is treated as an inconvenience in this society. We are expected, all of us, disabled or not, to be productive members of society and produce money. What is valued is productivity. This is why they try to make us '' recover'' as fast as possible with meds. Trauma can go soooo deep. The more you dig the more you find. And it runs so much of people' s lives but they don't wanna face it. People think if you have a job and have those things that on the surface make you seem like a well integrated person, then they are fine. They think if they aquire things like a job, a partner, a family, etc, then it means they made it in life. They mistakingly chase those things thinking those are markers of a successful completed life and they don't need to do anything else. They think those are markers of a healthy well adjusted person. People don' t realise how they are unconsciously running away from their traumas. They think they are living well, and the ones who faced their traumas are dramatic. When in fact, what they are doing is covering up abuse, trying to keep their illusion alive just so they don't have to deal with the pain.
I wonder that traumas from parents are due to the effort they make to (rightfully) control the situation. Raising children, who have ideas of their own, in a difficult, hectic world... I know of no parent who sets out to traumatize a child...
I write this as a person with CPTSD.
Yet again another very enlightening video. Thank you Daniel.
I have faced my own trauma in the past five years. The only reason I did this is that I was forced to - I saw the true face of my narcissistic parents in the flesh, unmasked.
The pain and panic of having the truth of my life - what I and others have done - has been beyond what I can take.
I am alive today only because I am substance free and have a job, economic stability, a sufficiently normal spouse, and children at home for whom I am responsible. I am also a reflective person by nature.
In other words, I have the optimal circumstances for recovery. But it’s still not enough. I needed and still need a lot of luck. And I don’t know where I’m going or if I’ll get there.
My siblings are not as fortunate as I. One is still lost in the cloud of pain and the other seems cast in a state of permanent fragility.
As far as I can see, I agree most people live with trauma. But the pain of healing is too great for most. I do not see how people are going to be able to do it. Even if you are forced into starting, the process is so long and painful that it is too much.
As far as I'm aware "trauma" for Psychologists involves the threat of death, for diagnostic purposes, andrelates to PTSD. Other trauma causing repeated memories etc is "Adjustment Disorder".
“All one can discover from horizon to horizon are victims of victims.”
The Continuum Concept - Jean Liedloff
Yes indeed.
Thk u for verbalising this, Daniel. Little do u know, u hv spoken out for people like me too.... I also find it difficult to share with anyone now.... Totally alone, like u said... And I agree with u too, that this is a lifestyle.... Hv been doing this since I was a kid, and I'm 50 now.... Stil ongoing... And yes... People in my life do not understand why I'm still where I am in spite of all the years of healing I hv undergone.... And u hv given the answer for that.... Thk u again... Nice to know, out there, there are actually Many who are experiencing in one way or another similar stuff ike me... In that way, we are not alone.... Thk u once again... God bless..
You are 100% correct. Parents often do get a pass. Also teachers often get a pass, too.
I think it’s because we all recognize that those are difficult jobs but traumatizing other people is sad.
There's one thing about this take that I disagree with - partially. Traumas can be completely and thoroughly healed, but yes, it can't be done without really digging deep into everything about what you've been through. If you have PTS"D", (shock trauma), it can be completely resolved on a deep, physiological basis (Peter Levine's work has taught me this), and a person can go from being in complete ventral vagal shutdown to being socially engaged, out of the freeze response, and renewed... but this can't be done without becoming deeply in touch with your body, and a person also must deconstruct the cognitive lies and betrayals they experienced, returning to self compassion. It's a purging, integrating, and transformative process... but you're right; everybody in modern, armored society is traumatized by LIVING in society alone... healing trauma is an inherently radical process and it seems that we all agree here on that aspect of it.
(The idea that being in the transient state of trauma is somewhat of a permanent fixture is an idea I like to debunk when I can. I think it's entirely possible to not be in a traumatized state any longer, as a truth of nature, but it's true; armored society dissociates, sabotages, and puts so many caps and restrictions on that! So actually... I don't think I'm in any disagreement at all... you yourself believe traumas CAN and MUST be healed, and you are both in depth and real about this process, unlike mental health professionals and society at large... so consider it a small addendum, but not necessarily even a counter.)
Then again... I think of stuff like birth trauma and abandonment in early childhood, or problems in brain development that stem from trauma... I genuinely am not sure about that! It makes me wonder what kinds of trauma can and can't be resolved. I know some can be, even if a tremendous amount of digging, effort, feeling, learning, and reconstructing is needed... but how far is the reach...? (My philosophy is also about honoring and being in tune with what it means to be your "wild" and original, instinctual self. I want so badly to be freely in touch with this, to be unarmored and uninhibited vs. armored and controlling. But just how far CAN it go, if you have limitations on how much truth you can speak in the confines of society...? At least you can know it for yourself. But lacking the freedom in so many ways/suppression must have traumatic consequences...! Here I am, thinking out loud in the comments section. Anyway...)
Hey Daniel thank you so much for these videos I sometimes feel so alone too on my healing journey I know exactly what you mean by how deep the hurt n wounding is.. I feel so alone sumtimes.. But I'm so happy I discovered you I feel like there someone out there who Knows the realness of what is really going on and isn't afraid to say it.. I feel like i have a friend in you even tough I obviously don't know you and vice versa but I feel like I've found my tribe in a way if you were here.. Lol.. Anyway thank you damp.. Thank you.. E.. X.. x.. ☺️
Its nice to see some skillful interrogation of common beliefs in therapy and the mental health world
I would like to be an ally for you, Daniel. Of course, it's easy to say such things in RUclips comments. It doesn't make it a lie, though. You are an ally for me, albeit via RUclips. It's not meaningless at all, and my thanks are sincere.
Growth and healing is one in the same when your focus is the Sun.
Have you seen the tree that grew up through the chain link fence that seemed impossibly in the way? Growth patterns in nature are my new hero. Pay no mind. Our job is to never cease reaching towards the Maker. The sun warmth.
@@heatherwhitehead3743 the tree uses the fence to grow higher; growth turns obstacles into aid. I see you! 🙋🏻♀️
I feel like this tremendously. So much of this is things I have thought and said myself. ❤
This world was designed to traumatize us. Until the day we die. Even in death.
Very sobering and, oddly, encouraging for being so.
You have an ally here, brother. 🙏🌻
When Grandma had a hartattack, babysitting me when i was 5, it was very traumatic, but their was no agression against me! I spend 7 month in the hospital before i get my first Birthday
I see the overprotection that followed and hugging to kill very harmful and abusive
Words can hurt!
The vocalized order to get in the Train to Poland in the 40's did killed people!
Trauma never goes away, you just learn to live with it.
Daniel, I’d love to hear your thoughts on Pete Walkers book CPTSD from Surviving to Thriving
Walker's concept of "emotional flashbacks" has been incredibly helpful for me.
eastalawest Me too.. and then Richard Grannon’s mental fortress system which builds off it
was thinking the same thing as I watched this video
What is trauma? Is there a mechanistic way to relate to it? Is there an analogy that fits the way you see it, that one maybe could connect to how one might heal? Is it broken connections? Is it like wires being pulled out? Overload? Can you see it when it happens? It’s so invisible to us. Is it simply when … something really, really bad happens to you? Something so bad you cannot take it? I’ve noticed myself shaking lately during times of thin skinned angry sensitivity, that’s gotta be trauma, is it always like that? It’s like my entire perceptual system is not synchronising. Is that a thing, synchronising? Isn’t that what bonding is? What abandonment destroys? Maybe I’m reaching but when I stare ahead and really look sometimes I wobble in the strangest way. Even with patience I’m not sure it stitches itself together, not sure what to do. Something must have happened to me. It’s like shell shock I guess
In my experience you can dissolve trauma from the body. I believe this is something routine that humans have forgotten the need for. I view trauma the same as 'wear and tear' on our systems. It's an inevitable part of living and experiencing life. I think we have made it a big to do about nothing because we don't hold space in the world for people to acknowledge and separate their experiences from their personhood. Trauma work to me is about clearing those stuck experiences out of the body and the psyche so people can have the freedom to choose who and how they want to be and what they want to have. And when I say much a do, I dont mean people are being cry babies and need to get over it.. i mean that because we dont allow space for people to say this happened and impacted me in xyz way... we weirdly treat natural occurences of life as dirty secrets, blame and shame others and ourselves (this is a thinking point, but what the point of blaming and shaming your parent for not being able to do things they never learned how to do - remember there was no google etc. back then- what do we hope to gain? Mostly acknowledement, attunement, and legitimization of our pain and experiences think about how hard it is to do that for yourself... and think about the shame a parent will feel for letting their child down in the worst way possible.. abd worse to see all the parts of yourself you hate and have tried to bury staring back at you.) The disappointment and grief etc is valid and all part of the experience, but in the end we have to be a little bit thankful we live in an age where we can easily access content like this at our young age, some people are in the later decades of their lives just finding thos stuff out. And sometimes when we know we forget what its like to not know.
This excludes anyone with Big T traumas. If you have suffered at the hands of those meant to protect and care for you. Your environment failed you in the worst way. My heart goes out to you.
I'm a devoted ally even if we had never met, I'm with you just as I'm with me.
“..I look and them and I think.. you haven’t even started!! “ 😆👏🏻👏🏻
I watch/listen to quite a bit of true crime where the victim is either missing or killed. Most of the time, the narrator excuses the parents (when applicable) for behaviors that are so obvious to me to be neglectful and abusive.
A story I tried listening to yesterday was about a 15 year old girl who was found dead in a dumpster. The story went (according to her mother) that the girl led an ordinary life up until shortly after her 13th birthday, then suddenly she became rebellious, started hanging out with the 'wrong crowd,' started doing drugs and turning to prostitution. The mother used the phrase 'free spirit' and 'she liked to do things her way.'
I had to turn it off. It made me sick to listen to these adults. The mother didn't even look all that shook up. Her 15 year old daughter was found dead in a dumpster ffs. The uncle was more pissed off about the fact that the teenagers friends were saying that she'd prostituted and did drugs, than he was about the fact that she was freaking dead!!!
It disgusted me. I had to turn it off.
I'm glad I'm not alone in thinking that kind of thing is disgusting
I've had to be a lot more careful with the kind of media I watch nowadays because it often end up leaving me feeling triggered because of our evils thar we so often overlook.
i think thats really important to look at when wanting to understand society. especially in the context of colonialism and intergenerational and vicarious trauma. thanks for making it all a bit more understandable.
Stunted.
I was am a 5yr old child in the area of sex or intimacy. Every man I ever had sex with inadvertently became a violator during any sexual interaction. It took me a long time to identify this 5yr old was always there watching, being hurt.
People don't understand. Molestation is about the power dynamic of taking away someone's innocence. I hear the rate of female molesters is rising.
I also feel the only safe people to talk to about what happened is others who have experienced similar.
I really don't understand that aspect of male culture. We reduce a male's humanity differently than we do females. What people call normal is just some subhuman version of ourselves.
I really have no idea how to heal. I only strive to feel safe and find intimacy within myself. A place of respect for my heart. Nature helps.
🌹
Heather Whitehead. You said nature helps you heal. Does writing (journaling) or talking here about your traumas help you process what actually happened? I think it helps me to "get it out". Even a small amount of release unpacks and unburdens me. I don't expect ppl to understand the full extent of my traumas or their effects, nor do I expect others to fix things. I want to lessen any addiction I have. When I get emotionally upset, I eat to soothe, but it's only temporary. It's not a true resolution. I'm aware and validating myself, and wonder if another person can truly give one validation. To what degree can others assist another in becoming whole or no longer traumatized? I wish you well.
@Dunston Nobody cares about men, not even men. Men don't even care about themselves.
@Dunston For some reason Daniel blocked me even though I commented for the first time on this channel tonight. He probably didn't like the name of my channel "Pro Male Revolutionary".
I hope your perspective on this has changed since you made it, I noticed you put a lot more stuff out that sort of instructs people on how to create a life which fosters grieving. Hopefully we can all develop this thing so that we know how to make it only take a year or two of someone's life, not decades.
I so feel the same way about the isolation and the stigma around trying to bring out the issues.Even people with a wish to do well try to bypass dealing with what is really going on!
Thank you I've been saying every person has been traumatized and have traumatized someone
Hey Daniel, I love your work. I'm curious, have you ever read the philosophy of Nietzsche? I see so much of him in your work. Just curious, and keep up the good work
When I was watching this video, my mind kept saying: "Daniel, your biggest ally is the Buddha:)" you have revealed the wild secret of this human realm - everyone is traumatized and everyone is trying to run away from their traumatized feelings to a certain degree. and yes, I am afraid that is the basic fundamental truth of human beings. I have heard a lot of people's comment about the Gautama buddha: he is too negative, he is too pessimistic, he sees sufferings everywhere, even the most seemingly happy person. But Bingo! thats how it is.
The crickets are distracting. But it would help your argument if you defined trauma! It is also relevant that bad things, tragedies, disappointments, and undermined expectations happen to everyone, but not everyone suffers from PTSD. There is clearly a relationship between an individual's sense of capacity while those with personality disorders tend to already have poor coping that makes them particularly vulnerable to become further undermined by threatening outcomes.
We learn to live with our traumas, aren't we? I grew into a culture where, at least when I was a child, I heard a lot that children must fear their parents in order to obey and respect them, and beating the child as well as the wife, was brought from heaven, and one should bit them without reason so should be in peace and with no worries. Talking about an insane world... I also believe people with no traumas don't exist.
Thank you for your videos ❤
Hmm, I partially agree and partially disagree. I agree with that we cannot ever fully heal and know how we are affected. There's always going to be a shadow. I disagree with that we cannot appreciate nature, be in relationships, have children .. there still can be life, and joy, and love, and why not embrace imperfections and some pain? Awareness is key imo, and no; sometimes, that is not enough for being joyous. But we should not wait to be healed with our lives. We should heal and live at the same time. Maybe that's not possible sometimes. Then, we have to be patient and forgiving. Be okay with imperfections. I do love the fool's journey in Tarot. It is so holistic, and has forgiving elements. Shadow and light live side by side in that.
Not everyone is! I don’t ageee We talk about the extension that made someone helpless. I did so many experiences in life and they didn’t make me feel helpless and then I got an illness where it wasn’t easily diagnosed and took time and I was in all alone and so many medical checks blood tests etc all on my own and that was and became the milestone of my life- beginning of something difficult where I was left out. That is helplessness and that was that T. Then I agree that these techniques in the system help ..
what about childhood-trauma and the society around the family ? When society puts pressure on parents, to function by special ways, that can be bad for the child. Or think of partly very problematic things going on in school and kindergardens like bullying. Or when a parent is - for whatever reson- in struggle with a criminal structure, all that can worthen the fate of a child. In contrast, the more love and respectfull kinds of care parents find in society, the more they could realize, what they have to change for becoming good parents.
Daniel, how can everyone be traumatized? It's too generalized of a term, surely. I agree that everyone is traumatized to some degree, but that 'some degree' matters - it matters in that some people need more help than others. To say everyone is traumatized negates the people that are seriously damaged, doesn't it? Some trauma surely has to be heavier than other trauma?
We’re forced to conform in a largely traumatized population (large scale wars affecting millions of parents/bosses/coworkers/friends)
trauma has been normalized to burry it and figure out how to get by in a traumatized society by being shut down in many ways.
I feel you 2999999 percent facts!!!! So I don't know what stage really I'm in fact all I know is I'm working on me and becoming Genuinely happy and it is soo lonely and everyone EVERYONE looks and treats you like your crazy..!!!!hard at times to keep going!!! And stay grateful and keep love for everyone that's has and is hurting you.....but I know I do sleep better when I do decide it time for bed.....
I tend to agree that that trauma work can be a life long pursuit. I wonder what you think about NLP being used to create new neural pathways when trauma is triggered. Can triggers be lessened/got rid off by, what some would call, consciousness hacks?
I never see ads on this channel
Thank you for letting me know this. I wasn’t sure if there were ads or not on my channel. I made a decision a long time ago not to monetize the channel. But people were telling me that RUclips puts ads on all channels nowadays regardless of whether they’re monetized or not, and then people tell me that if RUclips is making money off my channel then I should too. But in my heart I don’t want to make money off this healing channel… So I still have not monetized it.
That says a lot about you Daniel. ⭐️
Would be worth to mention the diffrence between simple PTSD (usually one-off eg a car accident) and complex PTSD (usually interpersonal, chronic/repeated). Simple PTSD usually failry 'easy' to treat.
Have you ever read Living, Loving, Learning? My Dad stood behind that book.
I think that parents don't get a pass, especially mothers, but that people think of trauma as part of the experience. Not knowing that this is a very very variable output. So in the name of abutting that parents also had trauma, maybe even worse then they inflicted, the adult children are not really welcomed to blame their parents.
I think this needs to be forget reconsidered and explored 🙏