"I used to think the worst thing in life was to end up all alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people that make you feel all alone." - Robin Williams
What a coincident! My partner gave me a glass paper-holder that said, "The more people I meet, the more I like my dog" with a silhouette of a dog which looked the same my dog Pinky. Sadly, he got bone cancer in his spine, but he's always in my heart. He's my heart dog and now my doggy angel.
Yeah I feel depressed being around people even dating and relationships. I don't get along with people. Friendships and relationships just don't work for me. The more and more I deal with people or date it just brings me to the realization that I am meant to be a loner. I do have periods that I feel lonely but I need to force myself to remember that I am generally happy and less stressed alone. I'd rather be alone. Im done. As a Christian Im better off learning how to love God first instead putting my hope and trust in people.
@@thedon8223 For him to say that endurance was the measure of truth? I've been trying to form an artistic impression of this for quite a bit. He isn't resorting to traditional religious views.
Loners are handicapped, every thing has to be our way. We generally do things more efficiently than others so we get frustrated with others who don't concentrate as acutely as we do.
@@robertblake9892🤔 hmmm. That kinda don't play in my way of thinking. It helps me to not have to deal with people period. Can't see reaching that level of success and then seek out for any reason what it is I'm trying to avoid. 🤔🤔, Nope,Nope, uhh uhh! To each their own I guess though 🧐
Being along and talking less and move from all these all increase our value more even though it is too tought to more talkative but it is the best thing
I agree, who needs a bunch of people telling you what to do when you can try to discover yourself without the stress of worrying about who cares and who doesn't. Not to say that opinions are completely unnecessary but at the end of the day if you choose to spend your life pleasing other people, chances are you'll die from their rejection.
@@violetfem1808 Love to travel solo. I blend in and go my own way. Almost always to a coastal city with great food, where I don't speak the language. Perfect!😁
@@DenverDiscovery I guess I'm more of the hermit type? I love gaming & social media.. studying onlline... my pets. Just not into travel - the furthest I go is 1 hour away to shop at 2 stores that aren't near me. Trader's & Sprouts :D
I used to think there was something wrong with me because I didn't mind being alone, eating alone, going to the movies/mall alone.... I have no desire to come home to someone every day. People really understand how to be at peace with themselves. I'm alright with just me.
Frankly, I think that other people try to tell us there's something wrong with us for liking our own company. When I was talking with a fellow introvert, she said that people who like being alone are stronger than other people who needs validation from others. I'm not sure about that. Being around people who need validation makes me feel stressed and tired and I want to run away from them and their neediness...unless they're someone I care about. Even when I'm enjoying listening to music, reading a book or other interests and hobbies. In short, if you interrupt me while I'm reading and I don't start growling like a bear, you're important to me...even though I hate phone calls!
There’s a lot of born loners here and I just have to say - “being a loner you understand other loners - we are NOT lonely anti-social, we are selective social loners and I love you all!” ✌️
Same thing here i feel more comfortable by myself but still need one or two friends but that's been ruined by a jealous vindictive hateful asshole but I'll bounce back nothing has kept me down in the past and I've almost died numerous times
My divorce was 40 years ago this December. I'm 100% single. I don't date and don't have any close friends. I own my home, and no one ever comes to my home. I work for myself. I go out to eat by myself. I go to the movies by myself. I have two feral cats who love me. I like playing video games solo. I own a full-size pinball machine, which I love playing. I watch movies at home also by myself. I'm 100% debt free. I pay all of my utilities and phone a year in advance. I found my happiness, it's called simplicity. I love being alone. I'm never lonely, never sad, never depressed and never bored. I feel that I have an amazing life with zero drama. I wouldn't trade my life for anything.
@@LadyYoop I too have been solo for 25 yrs now. It had it's ups for sure but I was driven too this place. It's sound's like the Poster above achieved what I had hoped too but in my case.... I just got stuck with me and we don't get along very well. Stay Strong Sister. You Are an Inspiration.
If you ever meet a loner, its not because we enjoy solitude. It's because we have tried to blend into the world before, and people continue to disappoint us.
That's the thing, some of us it actually hurts some of us don't wanna be alone it really hurts so I think ur a liar I'm sorry, being a loner is not fun its depressing and upsetting
Same I spent 49;years trying to understand people to no avail I've cut everyone out now I only talk to the Lord after a lifetime of abuse it's now time for me
So true! I'm so over people's BS. I would rather be alone for the rest of my days than suffer yet another disappointment by someone else I foolishly let into my life. There are 3 things in life you can count on: death, taxes, and people disappointing you. I'm done with all that. But honestly, I do enjoy my solitude.
@@vee_da_reaper2350 I'm sorry you feel that way, calling someone a lier because you can't relate isn't fair. however that's normally down to your own limitations. You said being alone hurts, that's because you choose to let it hurt you. You don't want to be alone, and that is why you won't understand why for someone like us it's fine to be on our own. Most people are Co dependent and need someone, I don't, I'm an only child so being alone is fine by me, I do so much that I love, with zero limitations, I'm happy and that's all that matters. ✌🏻
My father told me at 11 years old, to learn and be comfortable with walking alone. I’m 29 now. I can flip the switch and be very outgoing when I want to be or when necessary. Being a loner is the best way to be; more focused, no distractions, no nonsense. Salute to all my fellow loners out there, we good, we’re always good 💯😂
Well said. This is me exactly....no problem being alone most of the time and actually prefer it, but can flip the switch and be a social creature seemlessly.
I always wondered whether I was a real loner or not. After listening to this video I’m still not sure. Well I do fit most of the criteria of loving my alone time. I also need some time with my friends but, I am more comfortable by myself. Saying that, The one thing that I cannot do is be alone in public meaning, eating out by myself or traveling by myself. I know I would never enjoy it as much as being with a friend. So what does that make me an in betweener ? Confused here. 🤔
It's a blessing that you got that from childhood. It took a bad childhood and a loving wife with similar, but different issues for me (and her) to realize this. I think the point is that we must live and exit this life with the right understanding of who we are.
I'm alone but never lonely. I'm comfortable with myself so I don't need to be busy running around. I love quiet and stillness. I enjoy people sometimes.
Me too, Mary....I took a trip to UK for my 50th birthday and thoroughly enjoyed being alone, my time, my schedule, my solitude in wonderful places...people seemed shocked that as a 50 yr old I did this alone. IT WAS GREAT!
Thank you! You summarized the video very well! I also kinda get tired of keeping up with people in general, and with the noises from messaging and calls coming from social media, not just from physical or face-to-face engagements. Nevertheless, I still enjoy friendly company from time to time as well. Just not on a daily basis.
@lordoftherings6591 I think what you wrote is profound (as well as true) in its simplicity. And I especially admire that you quote May Sarton.. An exceptional bit of wisdom from your exceptional mind. ⭐
@@MicheleOrlanis Thank you Michele for your kind comment. It really felt as if a glimpse of your kind soul was floating between the lines you wrote, that is what our world desperately needs. 👏
No drama, no loud confrontations, no mindless small talk. Peace and quiet and valuable moments in nature are the best. My art, plants, pets, guitars, cooking, bike riding and reading are just priceless to me. Some folks don't understand the value of self reflection.
Definitely a born loner. I used to think there was something seriously wrong with me, and struggled with not being a "good fit" much of anywhere. But I realized that the loner thing is part by choice, and part by default/accepting things as they are. Traveling alone is so much easier - I feel in complete control, can walk as fast as I want, and stop and chill wherever I want. Some people don't understand that, as if you cannot enjoy your vacations greatly if you're not with someone. I say mind your own f---ing business.
It definitely is.. Sometimes you can be around a bunch of people and still be lonely. In that case the company needs to change. but I agree completely and felt guilty as well..
This is so me. I'm 60 & finally accepting that I'm far happier being a loner. Was married for 20 years but got hurt so badly by my ex. I love my life as it is now.
Same here. 40 years to the day with one woman but she had become bipolar 16 years before I eventually divorced her. I tried but its incurable. Since then I've had 9 years of peace. No PTSD, no nail biting, no excessive drinking, no stress or panic, no running around after her.
Same here, I'm sixty also. It's taken me fifteen years to get over many hurdles mostly family daths on top of a break up. If like us this has to be faced alone, it can be a double edge sword being a loner. There will come a time when we will need someone to turn to. One or two good friends is needed.
it took me 50+ years to completely come to grips with this. Alone is my natural state. Relationships drive me crazy. I hate the drama and the compromising.
At 74 years of age and alone for the last12 years, I have found the peace I've been looking for without drama or concern with hurting someone's feelings.
I didn't learn until later in life that it's my destiny to be a loner. I tried to fit in and play along with societies expectations but it just didn't work and I always felt different. I am 60 now and have been retired for a few years and have come to know and deeply love who I am. Being alone is my joy!
@@williampride6008 Thats why us Introverts are more in touch with the world because we would rather watch everything like shadows receding into the background, we don't seek validation to get by in life, because we know who we are. \m/
But being a loner doesn't have much to do with other people anyway. If you're a loner, it's because that's your personality and being on your own makes you feel happy and free. If you're alone because of the behaviour otlf others, that's something very different. A loner naturally has that personality regardless of how nice or horrible other people are.
I love being alone. There is no judgement, criticism or disrespect coming my way from anyone. No kids or family I have to worry about or "provide" for. No one I have to "make" happy or there's going to be trouble for me now or in the future. My happiness does not depend on how another person feels. That is amazing freedom. It's like being let out of a prison.
I was shamed by family members for being anti-social and wanting to be alone when I was growing up. For a while a thought something was wrong with me. Fast forward to today and most of my family members have health issues because of the stress brought on by others. And I wouldn't consider myself anti-social. I'm just very selective of the people who I decide to let into my life. My time and personal space are very important to me.
Same here. As a child I used to have to be pushed into attending social events, family or otherwise. I am well-known in my family up until this day for being the odd one out.
There is a huge difference between being anti-social and wanting to be alone. If anything, wanting to be alone can be exacerbated by too much contact with people with traits of antisocial personality disorder (go look up the actual diagnostic criteria)... and it doesn't matter who is conflating terms in order for this statement to be true.
Natasha. I agree with you 100%. I have never gone to a high school reunion or to parties were old friends get together and rehash old experiences. I like the new thread new adventures and new experiences. It’s not that I don’t have old friends. But I like to expand my dimension, becoming a more rounded person with honesty virtue and integrity.
Yeah, me too. Except traveling point. No a big fan going places alone - never know what can happen, and sharing expenses helps stretch your $. Do not need social media ( avoid it at all costs), RUclips on the other hand... consume and comment ;(. Maybe I am not 100% loner after all.
From my experience: Loners do not need to stay single forever - they just need to find another loner. Such relationships can work very well because each of the two understands the other one's feelings and gives him or her the private time needed - and both avoid social gatherings together 🙂
Everyone I know always said I was born an old soul. I'm now 31 and already feel like I've lived my life to the full. I still have an amazing family, a small group of close friends, old friendly faces I'm happy to have small talk with if we ever cross paths - and that's pretty much it for me. Gone with the days of unprecedented amounts of drama and extremities of life. Now I'm just gonna focus on enjoying each day I live until it's my time to go. Nice and easy. No regrets.
Great video. I qualified on all 11 points and am quite content being a loner. In my 72 years of living I've learned that you only really have yourself to rely on to make you happy.
Patrick McKeag That's the same conclusion I came to in my 62 years on this planet. I am the only one I can depend on and the only one I can truly trust.
So true. I remember thinking if Whitney Houston had only really understood the lyrics she sang in The Greatest Love of All, she very well may have still been alive.
I think it’s better to be alone & feeling lonely because at least you know that you’re alone. Rather than being with someone that makes you feel you’re not lonely but deep down they’re not really truly being there with you. Because lonely or not is only your perception!
@@maicao8328 There's nothing worse than being with someone that makes you feel alone. When I'm just by myself I never feel alone because of all the things that I can entertain myself with. It's just so easy for me to be happy taking care of myself. I look young, I'm in good shape, I love working out...I even cycle alone. I do most of my things alone and perhaps this is why I stay looking 15 years younger.
Asked my grand mother a few day’s ago what type of child was I, and her first statement was, “ You were a loner” I never feel lonely maybe a little anti social at times but not lonely. This video has given me some clarity
I felt more alone when I was Married than I do now that I'm Divorced. I m done with drama. I'm done with Adult children's lives with so much turmoil. I spent a lot of time alone when I was a child, it's more natural to me now. ,
The self is the best friend of your dreams and best of partners in life. Of course, if your significant other isn't too great a pain in the ass around the clock...
I guess I’m a loner. I enjoy people in small doses. I don’t like small talk or drama. I prefer deeper conversations but most of the people I meet are pretty shallow, so, no thanks. Generally, people tend to drain my energy not add to it.
@ Terry Wade, I'm in complete agreement with your post. If most of the people you meet are pretty shallow (like shallow Hal lol), then you MUST live in LA, home of the energy vampires. You have my sympathy. You're just fine on your own.
What you describe are the classic characteristics of an 'introvert'. Not sure if that's the same as being a 'loner' because they have not defined the word in this video. Perhaps a 'loner' is just an extreme introvert. As an introvert myself, I enjoy engaging people on-on-one, but even then avoid getting into people's personal dramas and don't share my own. My wife and kids are different though because they are really just an extension of myself. In a sense they ARE me. A few close friends come close to that.
For me, I prefer being on my own because I've never met anyone who's company I enjoyed more than my own. I still enjoy limited interactions, but I'm always flooded with relief when they're over and I can be by myself again.
I can relate to that 100%.If i do have a friend come and stay for a night or two i feel so much relief when they have gone back home.Not that i dislike them but i enjoy my own space and company.
GJP.......Stop worrying about what people understand or think!......You be true to yourself and live your life!.....I LOVE being alone, like shopping, living alone especially after being divorced and dating a little few years ago , marketing alone, movies alone, theater alone , dinner, lunch, brunch alone , gardening and cooking alone (my therapy).... reading alone, definitely exercising alone....I do have balance with family events, or other social gatherings...and I still leave early!......I love my own company and having my Pomeranian dog!........I'm an animal lover and rescuer!....I love decorating my place, love having my own style, hair, etc...I go to museums, art festivals, art shows alone!......I just make sure I'm observant of my surroundings, cautious, have protection with me, ......One thing I will NOT do is travel alone because of the increased deaths, killings, RAPES, robberies!......I will do that with family members!....I'm more of an introvert and love it!........PEACE TO YOU
@@ShibaMomma143 I'm pushing 80 and have always loved being alone. I don't socialize hardly use my cell phone. The friends I have had through my life just about all of them have died. I have my house back more than 300 feet from the street. I own three acres with a fabricating shop, that is where I spend every day in my shop. Life is good and I have never enjoyed hearing other people tell me about their lives.
♥I am 67 and have had two "important" relationships that ended after 5 years. Sure, I had fun, but I have come to realize that just being alone and have very few friendships is enough for me. ♥
Probably because he had important things to do. I feel I'm always too busy to socialize, that I have a lot of things to, but really it's just that I have no interest in socializing and when people ask questions they get on my nerves. All I have is a girlfriend and that's all I need. When someone talks to me it's irritating to me.
Mr. Sullivan , I completely relate. as time cycles on I have been able to see the wisdom that can be gained in that solitude . Now more than ever I see how media tries to influence us to need others and its all for the dollar there is no real need to feel desperation for a life lived in solitude. This country is beset upon us in the guise of advertisements hoping they can make us feel enmeshed with one another and would that make them fulfilled not a chance, that kind of greed usually ends in downfall, as it should!
I am a loner but not lonely. Worked with public for years and damn glad I don't have to anymore. Retired, cabin in the mountains and loving it. Birds, deer, bears etc. Wonderful. Peaceful. Glass of wine on my back deck and thankful to God for my life.
If I wasn’t so slow of a person I’ve dream of a nice settlement place such like you describe I’m barley 23 and losing my mind literally can’t do well at anything just waiting for the worst like no hope broke as a joke
I’m not necessarily a born loner, I feel like I have never found my crowd, my people/my tribe. I just got fed up of not being able to speak my mind with people who don’t appreciate me. Too much competition or meaningless conversations. I also wouldn’t want someone pretending to agree with me, just to keep the peace. I rather just be by myself. I’m happier that way.
My score = 11 out of 11. Yes, I'm a hard core loner. I am non social, not anti social. I do talk to people when I encounter them, but prefer being alone. And there have been times when I have gone months without human contact, by choice.😊
This video described me to a Tee. Everything applied to me. I am 90 yrs old and even today I spend most of the day doing what pleases me most. I draw, Paint and compose poetry. I spend hours on the computer leaning new things and watching creative videos. It never occurred to me that Many other people are like me but I guess there are
Pushing 70 myself I am a bit anxious to grow old all alone. So I compromise, on the expense to get annoyed sometimes. But I also need my own space to be comfortable and being able just to do my own thing at my own time.
I'm a born loner, and every single aspect of this video applies to me. But I've always felt wrong and antisocial. Probably, because that's what everybody kept telling me. Now, that I'm over 40, I'm finally starting to understand, that, to be like this, is not only okay but essentially necessary for my wellbeing and my productivity. It's a lifestyle I'm allowed (and even obliged) to stand up for. Thank you for this well made and affirming video.
Yes, over the years I've come to take pride in the fact that I'm "socially unacceptable." Being a loner is simply a way of life. Just because it isn't the "norm," does not make it wrong. How many people in today's society can actually say that they enjoy their own company? Not many. As I've come to accept being a loner over the years, I've also come into acceptance of the fact, that I believe, it's a much better way of life than what we see as the "norm" in society today. Of course, this is just my opinion.
Everything on this list in this video applies to me too,, I'm definitely a loner by heart,,, ever since I moved out to my own apartment and really experiencing the real world since 2017, I have been a loner,, I love my peace and,, I hate drama ,, I hate very loud human beings,, I love my own company to an certain extent ,, I can go 2, 3 days without contacting anyone,, I just love the quietness
On the contrary, loneliness is doing my head in. Still single at 58 no kids, no friends and I don't even touch my phone because no one rings and I have no one to ring. Maybe I'm having a mid life crises though I refuse to go into depression.
@@hadrian3487 naw you're good,,, the ppl that really fwu will ring you,, if not then forget them , u still have a life to live,, always remember, you were born in the world alone and you will die alone,, so it's nothing wrong with being alone,, just having a few friends or associates to talk to here & there thru social media or at work etc. is completely fine. None of those ppl are helping you with your bills right ? So just worry about yourself and be happy that you are still living life
I’m a loner at heart but I believe there needs to be a balance. I try not to lose touch with other people and their needs while still carving some time to myself.
I have added a comment, but you hit the mail on the head. Balance and caring for others is important. I am a loner in many ways but I never want to lose touch with the rest of humanity. All people have their beauty and I can enjoy people, however, it’s ok to not want to be buddy buddy or get in their space with them. 😊 ❤️
Exactly, I agree with you also on this. There is a balance to still have that connection with other people that brings fulfillment while also taking some time apart for yourself to recoup. Thank you for sharing this!
I've realised how much of myself I've put away for others, because it was "the right thing to do", thinking that socializing is the norm and the natural evolution, regardless of how we were. My feelings, my loneliness, myself, my passions, my goals...I've put all that aside to devote myself to my friends (like 80% for them and only 20% for me) I lost myself, my confidence and my value. Never again.
I enjoy being alone. I go where I want, when I want and I don't have to answer to anyone. There's no greater freedom than jumping on my Harley and just taking off with no particular destination in mind. No drama, just peace. Anyone who doesn't enjoy being alone will never understand why we enjoy it.
My daddy (btw, his name is Marshall too) was my best friend for all of my life until he passed away in 2016. I had lived with him for a few years up to his passing. My daughter moved in with me a couple of years later. (we no longer live together👏🏾) A friend of my commented, “At least you’ll have company now.” Huh?🤷🏾 I was perfectly fine by myself after my daddy passed. My friend’s comment was a reflection of HERSELF! SHE would feel LONELY. She never thought I could actually enjoy being alone.
“Who travels fastest, travels alone.” Admiral Ernie J. King. The admiral wasn’t talking about speed. If there is somewhere you WANT to invest your time in you’ll get there earlier and have more time to invest if you go it alone.
Wow! I am downloading and saving this. People are always trying to figure out “what’s wrong” with me. I love this video and each and ❤ every comment. Blessings to us all!
I'm happiest being alone. I've tried being out in the world but the world is really a disappointment to me. I'm content to live life my way and I'm happy for it.
@@pamelah848 Wow. I have heard about all these people who recognise themselves as animals. A pity you don't live in Darwin. i would love to meet one of you.
Definitely an extreme introvert. Manipulative and domineering people hate me (the feeling is mutual) because I dance to my own tune and REFUSE to be controlled. I absolutely dread social gatherings and have to come up with a good lie to avoid offending nice people who simply can’t comprehend wanting to be alone. I simply place a very high value on my time. When I’m done with my job, my time is mine. Unless it is a close loved one. One thing people find unusual is that I am never bored. I can ALWAYS find something to do that interests me.
People who get bored are boring people. I never get bored either. I'd rather be alone in my apartment doing homework , watching movies or RUclips, playing with my dog etc than be with a bunch of fake ass people
Your comment resonates with me as I feel much the same way. I have friends who often invite me "out" and I'm always making excuses to not go. Because going out almost always involves alcohol, noisy places and people who talk a lot but actually say very little of anything interesting or meaningful. The only time I feel bored is when I go out with friends who want to drink at noisy crowded places. I usually can't wait get home and be alone whereby I "recover" and feel at peace again. I think I was the only person in my circle of friends and family who never complained about the lockdown. I quite liked it. There were less people on the streets, less cars on the roads and places in general were much quieter.
@@samadhistate9637 Yes, the noisy alcohol-based nightclub scene was never for me either, even when I was young enough to get away with it. I don't drink now because I just don't enjoy it. I do like loud music in my own space though. I like to be "surrounded" by the music I love rather than straining and concentrating to hear it.
@@rainfall8888 It's wrong that there are so many people telling you how to live your life - whose life is it anyway? Do exactly what you are happy with doing (as long as it doesn't harm others) and just do what you feel comfortable with. I've been a loner even since I was at school, but I just didn't realise it at the time. I always felt like all the other kids were just a mass of other people who I didn't want to be like, or be with, and with whom I had nothing in common. I got into a lot of fights, and I mean a lot; at one point I had a fight every single day, and sometimes more than one a day. I didn't (usually) start it though, but the teachers still thought that I was the problem. I did have a couple of friends who I felt comfortable with, and who seemed to understand it, and we still keep in touch today, remotely (birthday and Christmas cards). I am married though, and my wife was always a loner at her school and got bullied a lot; we met at work in the 90s. Maybe loners gravitate to other loners because we recognise something in each other? I don't know, but we've been very happily married for 26-years now, so maybe there is something in it.
Better to be a lone wolf than a popular sheep. I severed ties with a lot of people after seeing their true colours and decided I don't want or need people like that in my life. I prefer solitude and walk my own path in life alone & my way. I have mental fortitude & can deal with solitude no problem as I have no drama, chaos or stress in my life as a result & it's awesome.
"The weather is hot but getting cooler tomorrow and the Lakers lost, Trump is lost too and so what do we do"? It was nice talking to you and catching up, see you again. I enjoyed the conversation and thanks for your time!
Loner. Introvert. Doesn't matter what you call us. We are more content alone. Hopefully this video will help others understand us a little better. I can't stand people who have tried telling me that " you NEED people". When honestly, no I don't. I live alone and couldn't be paid enough to live with someone again.
The idea of needing people drives me nuts, now, too. This is a common fallacy, IMO, but we have many, many, of those. The biggest being this so-called reality but that's another discussion. We certainly don't seem to need many people and length of time is no guarantee for a good relationship. My oldest friends turn out to know me the least.
"I need people?" Akin to craving a whopping case of hemorrhoids. The best person to have in your life is someone who can live in their own mind, as yourself, and coexist with you without all the stupid drama and need for social gratification, two strange ducks in a pond. To use a physics analogy, as soliton waves the two of you will never need to be entwined or absorb one another's energy, you just playfully bump into each other from time to time.
I agree Cynth ! I drink a lot less these days too. I feel like I'm saving my soul by not answering my phone sometimes. It took a lifetime to get to this ZERO responsibility stage. I'm just going with the flow mate. I still have graditude but now i have contentment. 😊
I realized that after years of marriage, then getting separated, that I was much happier alone. Going home from work and having to share my thoughts, and listen to my wife's thought was very difficult. A tough thing to accept, but you have to accept it.
Pretty well describes me. I'm 63, unmarried, live alone and I've been a loner all my life. Friends often get irritated with me because they say I seem to, "drop off the face of the earth" for long periods, which is true. I couldn't care less what people think about me. I was a successful independent systems consultant before I retired about 10 years ago. The exception is I DO enjoy a good party with friends and family, from time to time.
I could have written this!!!! ( Except I can wait validation in my work. I don't care though in my personal life.) Yes, I avoid this smart phone down for days!!!!
I'm the same way. I live alone and sometimes I don't leave the house for 2 or 3 days at a time. I like people but it's not my main goal to be hanging out with friends all the time and I DO have friends, lol. Most people would say I'm outgoing and friendly and I can actually be the life of the party when I'm in the mood, but I really enjoy spending time alone.
I have been battling hip displacia for years, waiting to get my weight/A1c down so I can do surgery. I am 66, retired and live with my son. There are weeks when I don't leave my house due to mobility issues but as long as I have my dog, my books and a good movie, I'm living my best life!!
I have always been happiest when alone, to think my thoughts and do as I please. Fortunately, I was never really pushed to be "social" by my parents. I love the freedom of solitude.
I’m a born loner. I struggled as a child to be social like others but as an adult figured out that I’m essentially solitary by nature. A truly good book to me has always been like an interesting conversation, whereas small talk, parties and most people are just tedious. I’m contented and grateful now that I understand why that is.
It's quite easy to figure out that you're not a typical "small talker" when your words mostly fall upon deaf ears and confused faces, not that you're trying to impress people, but simply engage in a manner with which you're comfortable. You have to find it amusing when most will be marveled by the things you seem to understand with ease...it's called spending most of your time in deep thought, studying the world around you, as opposed to frivolous interactions. 🤓
@@patriciavandevelde5469 Patricia Sorry to hear about your lawyer. Mine wasn't cheap but I think he earned every penny. No idea what she would have cost me without my lawyer to defend me.
I was told by a friend "You choose to be lonely", to which I replied "No, I choose to be alone. There is a difference." And I had another person tell me that I was cheating myself of happiness, to which I replied "I would rather be content than happy." Being a loner isn't exactly what I set out to do with my life, but life can deliver some pretty heavy blows, and in return, I picked myself up and decided to concentrate on myself instead of worrying about the world. After all, at the end of the day, when I close the door, it's just me and the dogs.
Similarly, I have had people say I am being _selfish_ because I choose to spend time alone (but not lonely). Not one has been able to explain what they really mean when I challenge them on their statement ... it's almost like it's a stock response without any substance when people cannot reconcile the idea that some people choose to be alone.
I love being on my own, I do like to socialise too but when I know I have a weekend to myself I feel so much better. I know I can do what I want to do without any dictation from others, I don't make any plans, I just take the day as it comes.
I don't even own a cellphone! People can get me on my landline at home if they want to speak to me. I also don't answer my door if I'm not expecting anyone. I enjoy solitary pursuits. Go on vacations by myself. I hate social functions and have a go-to list of excuses every time...lol
Cell phones can actually help you to be alone more. For instance, you can go off exploring without having to ask anyone for directions, where to eat, etc.
I'm a loner and therefore by choice I'm often alone ... but I'm never lonely. On occasion I realize, that only out of necessity have I spoken to anyone and that always makes me smile. Silence is the language of God and opens the mind to the spiritual side of life.
Splendid reply I never feel alone I have my sanctuary and I determine who , if any visitors are welcome. I am not a selfish or anti-social person, I am a man who's concern is my own security and serenity
Yup! I can’t stand people always on their phone! I like to work alone. I definitely love to live alone! No sharing anything and so what if the bed is a mess!😊
I really enjoy being alone more than anything...it feels like a vacation when you don't have to see or talk to anyone. I find a get anxiety when I'm around people so I feel way more comfortable when I'm by myself
I find it strange in a way, but it's true. We're social creatures by design, yet there is a certain degree of anxiety being around others! Being the way "we are," we can "feel" the perceptions of others and know that it's much better to avoid the drama which they bring to the table! Being a "Loner," if this is the title we're given, means that we are more intuitive of what others think about us, so becoming selective, for us, we tend to watch others become involved with the petty jealousy and bickering that goes on around us, because we generally stay away from that B.S.!!! Yes, I too, am a "Loner!" And Proud of It!!! Stay True to God and Yourself!!! "When God Created You, HE Validated You/Us!" ✌️🙏❤️
Hahah all the comments on my report cards from when I was a kid are, Lindsey does a good job with her work and behaves bla bla bla, but we wish she would work more in groups and with other kids
I’m a loner who’s been married for 20 years and felt utterly alone and never heard or listened to the whole time I was married. Now I’m separated living on my own and feeling more confident and comfortable with me being me and not having to be for others.
As long as don't forget compassion for others, helping the poor, sick and elderly, or your loner personality turns into big-time selfishness! One day you will be old, sick and frail
Thank you for sharing and I'm sure it's hard being separated to an extent. Sometimes we need space to feel whole again and you're doing just that. Hope you're doing very well, my friend :)
I say the same thing all the time. And the folks most difficult to deal with are church people. One nosey old woman got angry when I provided 36 Bible verses on gossip (why they intrude to begin with). Most verses address "old women" specifically.
I had a doctor tell me in my late 20s that stress is the number one killer and underlying cause for many ailments and diseases. At the time I had two peptic ulcers, I was married in a nightmare scenario of drama and dysfunction, and I all of a sudden had these two bleeding ulcers which of course freaked me out. I'm now 68 years old, been single ever since and the most happiest I have ever been, I happily consider myself an unsupervised adult. And pretty much everything this video just mentioned I can 100% relate to without hesitation, anyway, I love people and I very much enjoy leaving them with a smile on their face, but the key word is, (( leaving )) them better than I found them. Stay blessed everyone, enjoy your life to the fullest & remember to treat yourself kindly so as to be enabled to treat others the same.
I was in a abusive marriage 14 yrs., ended up with Ulcers, very painful. I'm a Nurse, so I knew why this happened to me. I left the marriage and within a year the Ulcers were gone !
68 here as well, 9 years divorced and calmer than I think I've ever been since childhood. I like my time alone, very few friends, I've dumped the idiots and demanding ones (Covid lockdown actually helped 😂), I travel, eat out, study, fish, hike, motorbike, hike with my dog. Since my divorce and being able to cease work life has become a haven of calm.
"Friends", no such thing... more like, use me till I either run out of whatever they need, or I drop them after waking up to the fact that I'm being used. Ended that cycle 20 years ago
I think with me being a loner, there's nobody there to disappoint you and make you feel bad. The best relationship you can have is the one with yourself 🖤🖤🖤
I used to feel as though something was wrong with me when I was younger. Then I realized that it wasn't me but the rest of the world. When I got older I met another loner/introvert and ended up marrying her. Now I have a son and a daughter who are both loner/introverts and all of us are happy as hell.
That is lovely that you are all happy just been alone together and that is just how it used to be for my mom and I for we was just happy been alone together for we was both loners but we was so happy and always used to have a laugh for we both had a great sense of humour and we always used to do things together.
There's nothing wrong with being alone. You don't have to follow what everyone else is doing. People get married, have families, but loners just want peace and to keep to themselves which I can relate. It's nice to see and hear from other loners out there.
my cousins for years pestered me on getting a girlfriend and dating then started asking if im gay its like no i just don't have the extra energy for another person atm i suffer multiple medical issues i don't need a partner i need peace and to be left to my plans and work. but they just don't seem to get that some of us don't want to deal with people
I’m a single guy at 24 years old and I enjoy my own company whatever I please. The whatever things I love doing. I respect myself, focusing on working alone in peace and live in spiritual life. No relationship, avoid complicated situations. Simple living and getting things together. Never get bored being alone. I feel 100% percent energize, than being around with others does drain my mood.
@@donkeylips8252 That's what Walmart online, Ebay, Amazon, grocery store online, and everything else online is made for. Or even self-check out. MAN, am I glad I live in the modern day, or I'd really be struggling having to deal with people all the time in 1890.
When I have tried to be outgoing and part of the crowd, it never worked and I only ended up being hurt. I'm 56 now and am finally accepting that I am a loner and this is what was intended for me. Such a relief to be alone and have peace and quiet. I don't even want my phone to ring these days.....90 percent of the time I regret picking it up. There are times I feel lonely - but a little loneliness is preferable to letting most people in. The freedom of being alone is amazing!
@@jaya.0069 sometimes I wonder if my cats get annoyed with me. I’ll mutter something to myself and with their hearing they look at me. And I say yes! I was talking to myself. Stop judging me! Lololol
I scored 11 out of 11 here. I'm neither antisocial nor an introvert, I have a small group of extremely close friends, I come from a loving and supportive family, I have been in and out of a few relationships, but I have come to realize that the times in my life when I have been happiest are when I've been by myself. Now, at 63, I absolutely love my solitary -and wonderfully free - life and I embrace it with gusto. I have human contact from time to time, sure, and I (sometimes) enjoy it when I do, but I certainly don't crave it. Don't let anyone make you think there's something wrong with you if you're a "loner", because there isn't.
Best comment yet Markus, I wouldn't change a word. I enjoy people sometimes, but my social battery doesn't last that long. I despise being pressured into outings, family or work related especially. I'm getting better at saying NO, and feeling OK about it. I really don't need much of that. I avoid relationships after 2 long ones because I definitely don't want to meet their friends, family or kids. I feel I can barely stretch myself for my own friends & family!
Gosh this is deadly accurate! I have decided to log off both my FB and IG accounts temporarily because I just feel that the more I use them, the more I feel irritated by checking and not checking new messages! I became very obsessed with both and whenever I have some free time of my own, the first thing I would do is to check if there's any new uploads and notifications from both accounts! When the notifications start to pile up after just a day or two, I become anxious because I am afraid I might miss out on some important stuff on social media. It has been 4 months since I logged off from both accounts, and I have no intention of going back! Staying away temporarily from social media does help clear your mind as you don't need to spend some going through those trivial, unimportant uploads!
Hey I agree J.N., this forum has been a complete eye-opener I did not realize I had so much in common with persons that actually share my most precious secret I was looked at as a freak during my childhood and now I see how much I gained in solitude, for me the price was just a pittence compared to the peace of mind afforded .As my life has played out at 66 I feel that my choice to be a loner was a wise method of self-preservation .
"I used to think the worst thing in life was to end up all alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people that make you feel all alone." - Robin Williams
Exactly
Wise quote. Yes, some of the loneliest people in the world are married and surrounded physically with people.
There is a big difference between "alone" and "lonely", just because you are alone, it does not mean you are lonely.
I guess the joke was on him 🤭
@@Daveena1008 I agree. And just because you're lonely doesn't mean your alone.
“The more I get to know people the better I like my dog.” -Mark Twain
What a coincident! My partner gave me a glass paper-holder that said, "The more people I meet, the more I like my dog" with a silhouette of a dog which looked the same my dog Pinky. Sadly, he got bone cancer in his spine, but he's always in my heart. He's my heart dog and now my doggy angel.
"I love mankind, it's people I can't stand." Linus
Not crazy about mankind either. Cats rule! @@freddieh5539
😊
That's a good one😉🐕
I am retired and single. In other words, I do what I want, when I want and with whom I want. Life is good.
Wishing you a long, healthy, happy retirement. 😊
Take Care.
Yes yes yes!
Yep
got that part right F-ing A Straight
Same same me you
I used to be a people person, but people ruined that for me.
Sums it up for most of us...
Hear you there
If you've got God you've got everything you need in this world 🌎I'm here for you
@@paulpayton8238 Thank you, but I’m agnostic.
@@paulpayton8238 Thanks Paul Payton, I fee that same way too. God, natural world, and authenticism.
The older I get, the more I like being alone. No drama, no stress, no disappointments. The freedom is mind blowing.
Yeah I feel depressed being around people even dating and relationships. I don't get along with people. Friendships and relationships just don't work for me. The more and more I deal with people or date it just brings me to the realization that I am meant to be a loner. I do have periods that I feel lonely but I need to force myself to remember that I am generally happy and less stressed alone. I'd rather be alone. Im done. As a Christian Im better off learning how to love God first instead putting my hope and trust in people.
Absolutely
Aye, agree, same here 🌺
and peacefulness too!
@@SuperValaVala sooooo true!
"I don't hate people... I just seem to feel better when they're not around." -Charles Bukowski
I'm very receptive to other peoples feelings and there is only so much i can
take!!!!
Love bukowski my fav quote....the world is a bag of shit ripping open and I can't save it🤣🤣🤣🤣
Buk was a genius
@@thedon8223 For him to say that endurance was the measure of truth? I've been trying to form an artistic impression of this for quite a bit. He isn't resorting to traditional religious views.
"I love humanity. It's people I can't stand." Charlie Brown. Or maybe it was Linus. I don't care.
It’s not being “anti” social, it’s being selective social.
FACTS 💯
Agreed! Otherwise it has this negative energy over it, and being a loner is not negative
Exactly!!
Exactly! very selective, when it comes to friends. Otherwise, social distance - distance club.
Yes, and you can also be social from a distance, by thinking about others and doing things for them whether they know or not.
The less dependent I am on others, the less disappointing my life becomes,
Yes, a big part of being an efficient loner is you learn to be very self reliant. Which in turn makes it easier for you to
help others.
Loners are handicapped, every thing has to be our way. We generally do things more efficiently than others so we get frustrated with others who don't concentrate as acutely as we do.
When I was a child I have no good childhood I never made friend
Absolutely brilliant statement, will be my mantra from this day on
@@robertblake9892🤔 hmmm. That kinda don't play in my way of thinking. It helps me to not have to deal with people period. Can't see reaching that level of success and then seek out for any reason what it is I'm trying to avoid. 🤔🤔, Nope,Nope, uhh uhh!
To each their own I guess though 🧐
I've learned to accept the fact that being alone is so much better than being around people you don't get any added value from!
Agreed. That means most people.
You must not been alone much an I mean alone
True
Being along and talking less and move from all these all increase our value more even though it is too tought to more talkative but it is the best thing
I agree, who needs a bunch of people telling you what to do when you can try to discover yourself without the stress of worrying about who cares and who doesn't. Not to say that opinions are completely unnecessary but at the end of the day if you choose to spend your life pleasing other people, chances are you'll die from their rejection.
Spending too much time around others drains me. Being alone recharges me.
Absolutely.
..Ditto...
Definitely.
Yes.
100% get that
"It is better to be single and alone, than wish you were," 🤗
Nice 👍 😂
"You enjoy traveling alone" - I don't even enjoy traveling 😁
@@violetfem1808 Love to travel solo. I blend in and go my own way. Almost always to a coastal city with great food, where I don't speak the language.
Perfect!😁
@@DenverDiscovery I guess I'm more of the hermit type? I love gaming & social media.. studying onlline... my pets. Just not into travel - the furthest I go is 1 hour away to shop at 2 stores that aren't near me. Trader's & Sprouts :D
Facts!💯
I used to think there was something wrong with me because I didn't mind being alone, eating alone, going to the movies/mall alone.... I have no desire to come home to someone every day.
People really understand how to be at peace with themselves. I'm alright with just me.
Frankly, I think that other people try to tell us there's something wrong with us for liking our own company.
When I was talking with a fellow introvert, she said that people who like being alone are stronger than other people who needs validation from others.
I'm not sure about that. Being around people who need validation makes me feel stressed and tired and I want to run away from them and their neediness...unless they're someone I care about. Even when I'm enjoying listening to music, reading a book or other interests and hobbies.
In short, if you interrupt me while I'm reading and I don't start growling like a bear, you're important to me...even though I hate phone calls!
Great comet thank you
@@trishawalsh7832great story enjoyed reading
Movies alone was always nice.
The more I get to know people, the more I come to the realization that being alone is not so bad after all.
The more I get to know people, the more I like my German Shepard.
its the best
@@burnerjack01 Dogs , and ferrets & cats too , are far better than the vast majority of people. GSD's are clever & versatile dogs.
The more i get to know people the mor i love my dogs.
@@poijntxhaisdgcha6004 same
There’s a lot of born loners here and I just have to say - “being a loner you understand other loners - we are NOT lonely anti-social, we are selective social loners and I love you all!” ✌️
I hear that.
Oh I love hearing this. It all makes me feel so normal!! :)
@@CathyCrothers You're perfectly normal. There's more of us than you think.
I agree!
This definitely needs sharing ☯️
"I don't hate people, but I feel better when they're not around." -- Charles Bukowski
"The more I am around people the more I like my dog."- Mark Twain.
Mickey Rourke/Faye Dunaway. .. Barfly... great line and great movie
I love humanity....it's just humans I don't like..
Same thing here i feel more comfortable by myself but still need one or two friends but that's been ruined by a jealous vindictive hateful asshole but I'll bounce back nothing has kept me down in the past and I've almost died numerous times
@@THE_HMRC tell me about it. BTW that's one of my favourite saying when I don't need to say anything
My divorce was 40 years ago this December. I'm 100% single. I don't date and don't have any close friends. I own my home, and no one ever comes to my home. I work for myself. I go out to eat by myself. I go to the movies by myself. I have two feral cats who love me. I like playing video games solo. I own a full-size pinball machine, which I love playing. I watch movies at home also by myself. I'm 100% debt free. I pay all of my utilities and phone a year in advance. I found my happiness, it's called simplicity. I love being alone. I'm never lonely, never sad, never depressed and never bored. I feel that I have an amazing life with zero drama. I wouldn't trade my life for anything.
I divorced in 1990 for the second time, liv on a boat now, brilliant life and wouldn't change the lone wolf nature for anyone.
How I envy you
@@unimpressed.. ME TOO...I am alone, and I do love it, but I have MS and it's sorta scary now.....but I'm still doing precisely me..
@@LadyYoop I too have been solo for 25 yrs now. It had it's ups for sure but I was driven too this place. It's sound's like the Poster above achieved what I had hoped too but in my case.... I just got stuck with me and we don't get along very well.
Stay Strong Sister. You Are an Inspiration.
I am the same and it is an amazing life.
If you ever meet a loner, its not because we enjoy solitude. It's because we have tried to blend into the world before, and people continue to disappoint us.
This is it!!!
That's the thing, some of us it actually hurts some of us don't wanna be alone it really hurts so I think ur a liar I'm sorry, being a loner is not fun its depressing and upsetting
Same I spent 49;years trying to understand people to no avail I've cut everyone out now I only talk to the Lord after a lifetime of abuse it's now time for me
So true! I'm so over people's BS. I would rather be alone for the rest of my days than suffer yet another disappointment by someone else I foolishly let into my life. There are 3 things in life you can count on: death, taxes, and people disappointing you. I'm done with all that. But honestly, I do enjoy my solitude.
@@vee_da_reaper2350 I'm sorry you feel that way, calling someone a lier because you can't relate isn't fair. however that's normally down to your own limitations. You said being alone hurts, that's because you choose to let it hurt you. You don't want to be alone, and that is why you won't understand why for someone like us it's fine to be on our own. Most people are Co dependent and need someone, I don't, I'm an only child so being alone is fine by me, I do so much that I love, with zero limitations, I'm happy and that's all that matters. ✌🏻
My father told me at 11 years old, to learn and be comfortable with walking alone. I’m 29 now.
I can flip the switch and be very outgoing when I want to be or when necessary. Being a loner is the best way to be; more focused, no distractions, no nonsense. Salute to all my fellow loners out there, we good, we’re always good 💯😂
Salute to you sir.
Well said. This is me exactly....no problem being alone most of the time and actually prefer it, but can flip the switch and be a social creature seemlessly.
I always wondered whether I was a real loner or not. After listening to this video I’m still not sure. Well I do fit most of the criteria of loving my alone time. I also need some time with my friends but, I am more comfortable by myself. Saying that, The one thing that I cannot do is be alone in public meaning, eating out by myself or traveling by myself. I know I would never enjoy it as much as being with a friend. So what does that make me an in betweener ? Confused here. 🤔
FACTS 💯💪
It's a blessing that you got that from childhood. It took a bad childhood and a loving wife with similar, but different issues for me (and her) to realize this. I think the point is that we must live and exit this life with the right understanding of who we are.
I'm alone but never lonely. I'm comfortable with myself so I don't need to be busy running around. I love quiet and stillness. I enjoy people sometimes.
Me too, Mary....I took a trip to UK for my 50th birthday and thoroughly enjoyed being alone, my time, my schedule, my solitude in wonderful places...people seemed shocked that as a 50 yr old I did this alone. IT WAS GREAT!
Thank you! You summarized the video very well!
I also kinda get tired of keeping up with people in general, and with the noises from messaging and calls coming from social media, not just from physical or face-to-face engagements. Nevertheless, I still enjoy friendly company from time to time as well. Just not on a daily basis.
@@bevtuft3572 wow that’s amazing. That’s gonna be me soon 🥰
Value your energy.🙏🏾👍🏾🏆
😚🐈🐈🐈⬛💕100%
“Loneliness is the poverty of self; solitude is the richness of self.” - May Sarton
@lordoftherings6591
I think what you wrote is profound (as well as true) in its simplicity.
And I especially admire that you quote May Sarton..
An exceptional bit of wisdom from your exceptional mind. ⭐
@@MicheleOrlanis
Thank you Michele for your kind comment. It really felt as if a glimpse of your kind soul was floating between the lines you wrote, that is what our world desperately needs. 👏
Beautiful! Thank you and Bless you for sharing. It's perfect
Well said 😊
No drama, no loud confrontations, no mindless small talk. Peace and quiet and valuable moments in nature are the best. My art, plants, pets, guitars, cooking, bike riding and reading are just priceless to me. Some folks don't understand the value of self reflection.
Brotherhood
Same here
YES!
Some of the most special moments in my young childhood was spending long days in the woods with my dogs.
@@burnerjack01 Agreed! I love my Boston Terriers!❤
This is me 100%. I'm a loner, but not lonely. I can enjoy the company of other people but in very small doses. Moderation is key.
So good! 🙌🏾
Exactly! I always tell people that being a loner is COMPLETELY different from being lonely!
Absolutely.
The difference between loneliness and solitude is your concept of who you are alone with and who made the choice.
Yes small doses, perfect definition.
Just cause I'm a loner doesn't mean I'm alone. I'm with myself and majority of the time, that's good company.
People don't understand alone and lonely are not the same.
Yep, me too.
Well said. I’m never alone either because I’m always with myself, and I’m good company, too.
Ditto!!💯🙌
Right on!
Definitely a born loner. I used to think there was something seriously wrong with me, and struggled with not being a "good fit" much of anywhere. But I realized that the loner thing is part by choice, and part by default/accepting things as they are. Traveling alone is so much easier - I feel in complete control, can walk as fast as I want, and stop and chill wherever I want. Some people don't understand that, as if you cannot enjoy your vacations greatly if you're not with someone. I say mind your own f---ing business.
Thants Right !!!
ditto
Oh, but people like us don't need other people around. We enjoy our own company!
I used to feel guilty and shame for being a loner, now I don't think it that way. There's a difference between being alone and being lonely.
It definitely is.. Sometimes you can be around a bunch of people and still be lonely. In that case the company needs to change. but I agree completely and felt guilty as well..
Same
💯 Same!
Since I've been married for 10 years I realized I'm a loner.
Well said being alone and lonely r 2 different things.
This is so me. I'm 60 & finally accepting that I'm far happier being a loner. Was married for 20 years but got hurt so badly by my ex. I love my life as it is now.
I can relate to getting hurt so badly by an ex. I was married for 25 years. I’m glad your enjoying your life now as well as I’am also.
Finally accepting my loner personality at 68.
Same here. 40 years to the day with one woman but she had become bipolar 16 years before I eventually divorced her. I tried but its incurable.
Since then I've had 9 years of peace. No PTSD, no nail biting, no excessive drinking, no stress or panic, no running around after her.
Most of us never knew we were hooked with a narc who drained us, day in, day out seeking our destruction----WTF was that for your dedication?
Same here, I'm sixty also. It's taken me fifteen years to get over many hurdles mostly family daths on top of a break up. If like us this has to be faced alone, it can be a double edge sword being a loner. There will come a time when we will need someone to turn to. One or two good friends is needed.
it took me 50+ years to completely come to grips with this. Alone is my natural state. Relationships drive me crazy. I hate the drama and the compromising.
Same.
You spoke my mind.
Me too..am 54. For me, it's a bit like coming out of the closet and admiting you are a loner to the world.
At 74 years of age and alone for the last12 years, I have found the peace I've been looking for without drama or concern with hurting someone's feelings.
anyway you always die alone nonetheless
I didn't learn until later in life that it's my destiny to be a loner. I tried to fit in and play along with societies expectations but it just didn't work and I always felt different. I am 60 now and have been retired for a few years and have come to know and deeply love who I am. Being alone is my joy!
65 ditto always an outsider trying to fit in
Good answer 👍
This resonates with me 100%. Unfortunately, a lot of people don't understand loners and think that we're either weird or don't have any friends.
I've decided that if liars & drunks are all I have to choose from, I don't want any friends. I have few friends. My pets adore me.
I feel you...
@@jeffd1919 Pets are the best, they don't Judge you on anything.
Not weird at all. Nothing wrong with being your own best friend. Nobody knows you better than you.
@@williampride6008 Thats why us Introverts are more in touch with the world because we would rather watch everything like shadows receding into the background, we don't seek validation to get by in life, because we know who we are. \m/
It's easy to be a loner once you realize the true nature of people.
But being a loner doesn't have much to do with other people anyway. If you're a loner, it's because that's your personality and being on your own makes you feel happy and free. If you're alone because of the behaviour otlf others, that's something very different. A loner naturally has that personality regardless of how nice or horrible other people are.
Depends on the type of people you attract in your life.
@@faithpearlgenied-a5517 Exactly a true loner "does not give a damn" in so many ways, yet that does not mean they don't care about people.
Wow. Exactly.
@@DrBeeSpeaks People bottom feed......time to awake unless you are woke.
To be a loner is to be stress-free.... And I find that very satisfied❤️
Ya I love being alone than surrounded by a bunch of harsh people
I'm always happy to see people when they visit, and honored that they came, but also relieved when they leave.
Ah... a true loner.
I love being alone. There is no judgement, criticism or disrespect coming my way from anyone. No kids or family I have to worry about or "provide" for. No one I have to "make" happy or there's going to be trouble for me now or in the future. My happiness does not depend on how another person feels. That is amazing freedom. It's like being let out of a prison.
Lies again? Private Jet Changi Airport
Yes, its 100% true you dont need anyone to make you happy in life you can be happy yourself
Until you realize you still need interaction and can't be in solitude for a long time. Cuz you will beg for just interaction of another living being
Very well said! Peace is TOP priority no matter how old I get.
Me too
I was shamed by family members for being anti-social and wanting to be alone when I was growing up. For a while a thought something was wrong with me. Fast forward to today and most of my family members have health issues because of the stress brought on by others. And I wouldn't consider myself anti-social. I'm just very selective of the people who I decide to let into my life. My time and personal space are very important to me.
Your life Joe, live it on your terms.
Same here. As a child I used to have to be pushed into attending social events, family or otherwise. I am well-known in my family up until this day for being the odd one out.
There is a huge difference between being anti-social and wanting to be alone. If anything, wanting to be alone can be exacerbated by too much contact with people with traits of antisocial personality disorder (go look up the actual diagnostic criteria)... and it doesn't matter who is conflating terms in order for this statement to be true.
@@williampride6008 its jealosy . I have grown up with those people and you do have to make a real effort to get them out of your life .
Completely understand and relate to
This is me 100%. I've finally decided to just accept it and embrace it. We can't define our happiness and success by society's standards.
Natasha. I agree with you 100%. I have never gone to a high school reunion or to parties were old friends get together and rehash old experiences. I like the new thread new adventures and new experiences. It’s not that I don’t have old friends. But I like to expand my dimension, becoming a more rounded person with honesty virtue and integrity.
👏🏽👏🏽💕
Yeah, me too. Except traveling point. No a big fan going places alone - never know what can happen, and sharing expenses helps stretch your $. Do not need social media ( avoid it at all costs), RUclips on the other hand... consume and comment ;(. Maybe I am not 100% loner after all.
Indeed, we are not brands and labeled goods, we're individual people.
Agree with you 100%.
I have always been a loner and I’m proud of it. Hated get-togethers and big crowds, the feeling of claustrophobia sets right in.
In this world full of stress and negativity, solitude is my best resort. I really do see myself in this list. Great video.
Absolutely
I agree!
Yes, and the world seems to have become increasingly dark over the past 30 years. People are toxic.
Your not a kidding especially like prison its a good day when your alone and not in jail for getting in fight with girls or guys whatever case may be
Every thing was right on🤔No one never could explain it so exact, wow🥳
I've always been a lone wolf. Don't get me wrong, I like people, I just like them better when they're not around me.
😂🤣😂🤣 SAME 💯
Lol 😂 truth !!
So true.
😂😂😂
Awesome 😊
From my experience: Loners do not need to stay single forever - they just need to find another loner. Such relationships can work very well because each of the two understands the other one's feelings and gives him or her the private time needed - and both avoid social gatherings together 🙂
Essentially the reason Im still single after all these years. Most of the things on this list are 100% spot on!
Loners of the world unite! Paradoxical? Well, life is paradoxical.
Yep, thats me. My other half is exactly like me, a loner. She understands how I feel and we get along great!
I can agree with you on this I think some things
Yes, I need someone that I can be alone with.
Everyone I know always said I was born an old soul. I'm now 31 and already feel like I've lived my life to the full. I still have an amazing family, a small group of close friends, old friendly faces I'm happy to have small talk with if we ever cross paths - and that's pretty much it for me. Gone with the days of unprecedented amounts of drama and extremities of life. Now I'm just gonna focus on enjoying each day I live until it's my time to go. Nice and easy. No regrets.
I love this. ♥️
Trah lah lah lah lah lah lah lahlahlahhhh
Great video. I qualified on all 11 points and am quite content being a loner. In my 72 years of living I've learned that you only really have yourself to rely on to make you happy.
Great video
If your not happy by yourself your not going to be happy with someone else ..first of all....
Love thy self
@@mariankeller5852 *You're.
Patrick McKeag That's the same conclusion I came to in my 62 years on this planet. I am the only one I can depend on and the only one I can truly trust.
So true. I remember thinking if Whitney Houston had only really understood the lyrics she sang in The Greatest Love of All, she very well may have still been alive.
“IF YOU’RE LONELY WHEN YOU’RE ALONE … YOU’RE IN BAD COMPANY.”
I ABSOLUTELY LOVE BEING ALONE 💯
I think it’s better to be alone & feeling lonely because at least you know that you’re alone. Rather than being with someone that makes you feel you’re not lonely but deep down they’re not really truly being there with you. Because lonely or not is only your perception!
😁👌
WORD!
@@maicao8328 There's nothing worse than being with someone that makes you feel alone. When I'm just by myself I never feel alone because of all the things that I can entertain myself with. It's just so easy for me to be happy taking care of myself. I look young, I'm in good shape, I love working out...I even cycle alone. I do most of my things alone and perhaps this is why I stay looking 15 years younger.
I agree!!!!!!
Asked my grand mother a few day’s ago what type of child was I, and her first statement was, “ You were a loner” I never feel lonely maybe a little anti social at times but not lonely. This video has given me some clarity
You're right. There is a difference between being alone and being a loner. And I am a loner.
I felt more alone when I was Married than I do now that I'm Divorced. I m done with drama. I'm done with Adult children's lives with so much turmoil. I spent a lot of time alone when I was a child, it's more natural to me now. ,
I'm both. But at 75, who cares?@@des.4381
The self is the best friend of your dreams and best of partners in life. Of course, if your significant other isn't too great a pain in the ass around the clock...
I have no idea what it means to feel lonely. In my 68 years I have been bored sometimes, but never lonely.
I've always LOVED being alone... even as a child I entertained myself for hours on end.
I manifest 10 of the 11 signs listed here
I have 10/11
Me too
I guess I’m a loner. I enjoy people in small doses. I don’t like small talk or drama. I prefer deeper conversations but most of the people I meet are pretty shallow, so, no thanks. Generally, people tend to drain my energy not add to it.
thats me..
I definitely can relate
@ Terry Wade, I'm in complete agreement with your post. If most of the people you meet are pretty shallow (like shallow Hal lol), then you MUST live in LA, home of the energy vampires. You have my sympathy. You're just fine on your own.
@@austriagiancarlo9433 Close to LA but closer to Disneyland. Most of Southern California seems to be this way.
What you describe are the classic characteristics of an 'introvert'. Not sure if that's the same as being a 'loner' because they have not defined the word in this video. Perhaps a 'loner' is just an extreme introvert. As an introvert myself, I enjoy engaging people on-on-one, but even then avoid getting into people's personal dramas and don't share my own. My wife and kids are different though because they are really just an extension of myself. In a sense they ARE me. A few close friends come close to that.
For me, I prefer being on my own because I've never met anyone who's company I enjoyed more than my own. I still enjoy limited interactions, but I'm always flooded with relief when they're over and I can be by myself again.
I can relate to that 100%.If i do have a friend come and stay for a night or two i feel so much relief when they have gone back home.Not that i dislike them but i enjoy my own space and company.
I love being alone. Wish more people would understand and not judge.
GJP.......Stop worrying about what people understand or think!......You be true to yourself and live your life!.....I LOVE being alone, like shopping, living alone especially after being divorced and dating a little few years ago , marketing alone, movies alone, theater alone , dinner, lunch, brunch alone , gardening and cooking alone (my therapy).... reading alone, definitely exercising alone....I do have balance with family events, or other social gatherings...and I still leave early!......I love my own company and having my Pomeranian dog!........I'm an animal lover and rescuer!....I love decorating my place, love having my own style, hair, etc...I go to museums, art festivals, art shows alone!......I just make sure I'm observant of my surroundings, cautious, have protection with me, ......One thing I will NOT do is travel alone because of the increased deaths, killings, RAPES, robberies!......I will do that with family members!....I'm more of an introvert and love it!........PEACE TO YOU
Definitely prefer drinking alone, with music and writing.
What other people think is THEIR business.
@@ShibaMomma143 I'm pushing 80 and have always loved being alone. I don't socialize hardly use my cell phone. The friends I have had through my life just about all of them have died. I have my house back more than 300 feet from the street. I own three acres with a fabricating shop, that is where I spend every day in my shop. Life is good and I have never enjoyed hearing other people tell me about their lives.
Agreed. Don't worry about the judging ones. To hell with them.
♥I am 67 and have had two "important" relationships that ended after 5 years. Sure, I had fun, but I have come to realize that just being alone and have very few friendships is enough for me. ♥
"I live in that solitude which is painful in youth, but delicious in the years of maturity."
-- Albert Einstein
Totally agree
Probably because he had important things to do. I feel I'm always too busy to socialize, that I have a lot of things to, but really it's just that I have no interest in socializing and when people ask questions they get on my nerves.
All I have is a girlfriend and that's all I need.
When someone talks to me it's irritating to me.
@@luismangiaterra1031 if you have 1 girlfriend, you are not being a LONER anymore. You become a COUPLE
@@pabloperez4063 I just keep a girlfriend out of necessity, otherwise I don't need it.
She knows I'm like that.
Mr. Sullivan , I completely relate. as time cycles on I have been able to see the wisdom that can be gained in that solitude . Now more than ever I see how media tries to influence us to need others and its all for the dollar there is no real need to feel desperation for a life lived in solitude. This country is beset upon us in the guise of advertisements hoping they can make us feel enmeshed with one another and would that make them fulfilled not a chance, that kind of greed usually ends in downfall, as it should!
I am a loner but not lonely. Worked with public for years and damn glad I don't have to anymore. Retired, cabin in the mountains and loving it. Birds, deer, bears etc. Wonderful. Peaceful. Glass of wine on my back deck and thankful to God for my life.
Nice 👍 🥂
If I wasn’t so slow of a person I’ve dream of a nice settlement place such like you describe I’m barley 23 and losing my mind literally can’t do well at anything just waiting for the worst like no hope broke as a joke
but sooner or later the fiddler will have to paid and it will end in suicide as you age
Me too! I felt like ER Bunny somedays with tooooo much of the public in a high profile job. LOVE alone time now.
Amen Paige. You go girl.
I’m not necessarily a born loner, I feel like I have never found my crowd, my people/my tribe.
I just got fed up of not being able to speak my mind with people who don’t appreciate me. Too much competition or meaningless conversations. I also wouldn’t want someone pretending to agree with me, just to keep the peace. I rather just be by myself. I’m happier that way.
We're out here.... We're just spread out. For now I suppose. Godbless
Yeah another one here.
Me too !!!! 😁😁😁
It’s like trying to heard cats…lol
@@Grassmpl Likewise ..Hello at a distance!
My score = 11 out of 11. Yes, I'm a hard core loner. I am non social, not anti social. I do talk to people when I encounter them, but prefer being alone. And there have been times when I have gone months without human contact, by choice.😊
This video described me to a Tee. Everything applied to me. I am 90 yrs old and even today I spend most of the day doing what pleases me most. I draw, Paint and compose poetry. I spend hours on the computer leaning new things and watching creative videos. It never occurred to me that Many other people are like me but I guess there are
Did you ever marry?
are you really 90? if so ... thats great.
Pushing 70 myself I am a bit anxious to grow old all alone. So I compromise, on the expense to get annoyed sometimes. But I also need my own space to be comfortable and being able just to do my own thing at my own time.
You sound fabulous to me, I’m half your age but we could be twins. Sending love. ❤️
Yup
I'm a born loner, and every single aspect of this video applies to me. But I've always felt wrong and antisocial. Probably, because that's what everybody kept telling me.
Now, that I'm over 40, I'm finally starting to understand, that, to be like this, is not only okay but essentially necessary for my wellbeing and my productivity. It's a lifestyle I'm allowed (and even obliged) to stand up for.
Thank you for this well made and affirming video.
Yes, over the years I've come to take pride in the fact that I'm "socially unacceptable." Being a loner is simply a way of life. Just because it isn't the "norm," does not make it wrong. How many people in today's society can actually say that they enjoy their own company? Not many. As I've come to accept being a loner over the years, I've also come into acceptance of the fact, that I believe, it's a much better way of life than what we see as the "norm" in society today. Of course, this is just my opinion.
Everything on this list in this video applies to me too,, I'm definitely a loner by heart,,, ever since I moved out to my own apartment and really experiencing the real world since 2017, I have been a loner,, I love my peace and,, I hate drama ,, I hate very loud human beings,, I love my own company to an certain extent ,, I can go 2, 3 days without contacting anyone,, I just love the quietness
On the contrary, loneliness is doing my head in. Still single at 58 no kids, no friends and I don't even touch my phone because no one rings and I have no one to ring. Maybe I'm having a mid life crises though I refuse to go into depression.
I get it 👍
@@hadrian3487 naw you're good,,, the ppl that really fwu will ring you,, if not then forget them , u still have a life to live,, always remember, you were born in the world alone and you will die alone,, so it's nothing wrong with being alone,, just having a few friends or associates to talk to here & there thru social media or at work etc. is completely fine. None of those ppl are helping you with your bills right ? So just worry about yourself and be happy that you are still living life
I’m a loner at heart but I believe there needs to be a balance. I try not to lose touch with other people and their needs while still carving some time to myself.
Very well said! Ditto for me also.
I have added a comment, but you hit the mail on the head. Balance and caring for others is important. I am a loner in many ways but I never want to lose touch with the rest of humanity. All people have their beauty and I can enjoy people, however, it’s ok to not want to be buddy buddy or get in their space with them. 😊 ❤️
I agree having balance is key to all knowing and being complete in yourself and owning that power
Exactly, I agree with you also on this. There is a balance to still have that connection with other people that brings fulfillment while also taking some time apart for yourself to recoup. Thank you for sharing this!
Same
I've realised how much of myself I've put away for others, because it was "the right thing to do", thinking that socializing is the norm and the natural evolution, regardless of how we were.
My feelings, my loneliness, myself, my passions, my goals...I've put all that aside to devote myself to my friends (like 80% for them and only 20% for me) I lost myself, my confidence and my value. Never again.
Being a loner isn't a negative impact, it's more of a positive .
Yeh I agree
@@woodynorris8224 matter of opinion
I agree. If a person can't enjoy themselves how can they enjoy others.
I agree, solely.
@@bernardbrooks3935 you definitely have a point.
I enjoy being alone. I go where I want, when I want and I don't have to answer to anyone. There's no greater freedom than jumping on my Harley and just taking off with no particular destination in mind. No drama, just peace. Anyone who doesn't enjoy being alone will never understand why we enjoy it.
My daddy (btw, his name is Marshall too) was my best friend for all of my life until he passed away in 2016. I had lived with him for a few years up to his passing. My daughter moved in with me a couple of years later. (we no longer live together👏🏾) A friend of my commented, “At least you’ll have company now.” Huh?🤷🏾 I was perfectly fine by myself after my daddy passed. My friend’s comment was a reflection of HERSELF! SHE would feel LONELY. She never thought I could actually enjoy being alone.
Exactly 💯 Marshall .Bang on .There's nothing like it .
“Who travels fastest, travels alone.” Admiral Ernie J. King. The admiral wasn’t talking about speed. If there is somewhere you WANT to invest your time in you’ll get there earlier and have more time to invest if you go it alone.
Wow! I am downloading and saving this. People are always trying to figure out “what’s wrong” with me. I love this video and each and ❤ every comment. Blessings to us all!
I can totally relate.
I'm happiest being alone. I've tried being out in the world but the world is really a disappointment to me. I'm content to live life my way and I'm happy for it.
#12 - Loners typically have at least one pet and feel that pet is smarter than 99% of the people they have encountered.
A pet also makes you feel a whole lot better, more calmed than any human.
True That!!!
Then they are not loners. They simply cling to non-humans. This is very different.
@@tonyryan43 I don't agree. I realized that I don't like dogs because they're too clingy./sappy I like cats. I AM a cat.
@@pamelah848 Wow. I have heard about all these people who recognise themselves as animals. A pity you don't live in Darwin. i would love to meet one of you.
Definitely an extreme introvert. Manipulative and domineering people hate me (the feeling is mutual) because I dance to my own tune and REFUSE to be controlled. I absolutely dread social gatherings and have to come up with a good lie to avoid offending nice people who simply can’t comprehend wanting to be alone. I simply place a very high value on my time. When I’m done with my job, my time is mine. Unless it is a close loved one. One thing people find unusual is that I am never bored. I can ALWAYS find something to do that interests me.
What does "bored" mean? Like you I don't suffer from it either.
I think that people who are easily bored just have a lack of brain power.
People who get bored are boring people. I never get bored either. I'd rather be alone in my apartment doing homework , watching movies or RUclips, playing with my dog etc than be with a bunch of fake ass people
Your comment resonates with me as I feel much the same way. I have friends who often invite me "out" and I'm always making excuses to not go. Because going out almost always involves alcohol, noisy places and people who talk a lot but actually say very little of anything interesting or meaningful. The only time I feel bored is when I go out with friends who want to drink at noisy crowded places. I usually can't wait get home and be alone whereby I "recover" and feel at peace again. I think I was the only person in my circle of friends and family who never complained about the lockdown. I quite liked it. There were less people on the streets, less cars on the roads and places in general were much quieter.
@@samadhistate9637 Yes, the noisy alcohol-based nightclub scene was never for me either, even when I was young enough to get away with it. I don't drink now because I just don't enjoy it. I do like loud music in my own space though. I like to be "surrounded" by the music I love rather than straining and concentrating to hear it.
@@rainfall8888 It's wrong that there are so many people telling you how to live your life - whose life is it anyway? Do exactly what you are happy with doing (as long as it doesn't harm others) and just do what you feel comfortable with.
I've been a loner even since I was at school, but I just didn't realise it at the time. I always felt like all the other kids were just a mass of other people who I didn't want to be like, or be with, and with whom I had nothing in common. I got into a lot of fights, and I mean a lot; at one point I had a fight every single day, and sometimes more than one a day. I didn't (usually) start it though, but the teachers still thought that I was the problem. I did have a couple of friends who I felt comfortable with, and who seemed to understand it, and we still keep in touch today, remotely (birthday and Christmas cards).
I am married though, and my wife was always a loner at her school and got bullied a lot; we met at work in the 90s. Maybe loners gravitate to other loners because we recognise something in each other? I don't know, but we've been very happily married for 26-years now, so maybe there is something in it.
In my 70’s and been this way all my life and love it.
I'm not alone, I have me
Same here.
Better to be a lone wolf than a popular sheep. I severed ties with a lot of people after seeing their true colours and decided I don't want or need people like that in my life. I prefer solitude and walk my own path in life alone & my way. I have mental fortitude & can deal with solitude no problem as I have no drama, chaos or stress in my life as a result & it's awesome.
I completely agree with you. I love my peace and peace of mind.
Totally agree with you too! Far better a wolf than a sheep!
I definitely fall into this category. I really appreciate my alone time. Thanks for sharing this video.
I’ve been a loner for most of my life, and I enjoy it. I love the quiet that comes with it.
You are right! Im more content alone. Focus on my hobbies
So true !
100% 😚🐈🐈🐈⬛💕🇺🇲
I love being alone but when I tried to connect with people always end up worse. I realized being alone is the best thing for me.
Me too.
"The weather is hot but getting cooler tomorrow and the Lakers lost, Trump is lost too and so what do we do"?
It was nice talking to you and catching up, see you again. I enjoyed the conversation and thanks for your time!
Loner. Introvert. Doesn't matter what you call us. We are more content alone. Hopefully this video will help others understand us a little better.
I can't stand people who have tried telling me that " you NEED people".
When honestly, no I don't. I live alone and couldn't be paid enough to live with someone again.
The idea of needing people drives me nuts, now, too. This is a common fallacy, IMO, but we have many, many, of those. The biggest being this so-called reality but that's another discussion. We certainly don't seem to need many people and length of time is no guarantee for a good relationship. My oldest friends turn out to know me the least.
You hit the nail on the head. Lovely 😍 comment. Thanks 😊!
And they must stop calling us secretive.We are private and plz RESPECT us
@@jesuschristislord1845 👍👏👏👏👏
"I need people?" Akin to craving a whopping case of hemorrhoids.
The best person to have in your life is someone who can live in their own mind, as yourself, and coexist with you without all the stupid drama and need for social gratification, two strange ducks in a pond.
To use a physics analogy, as soliton waves the two of you will never need to be entwined or absorb one another's energy, you just playfully bump into each other from time to time.
Being alone - 100% Freedom! Nothing like it.
I agree Cynth ! I drink a lot less these days too. I feel like I'm saving my soul by not answering my phone sometimes. It took a lifetime to get to this ZERO responsibility stage. I'm just going with the flow mate. I still have graditude but now i have contentment. 😊
@@lizliz7075 - I understand, I stand with you, and forward we go!
I am 100% born to be a loner. The moments i was in a relationship i always longed for the moment i be alone again. Born to be free.
I'm one of those people who was truly born to be alone. It's fun for me. So much to enjoy!😊
This probably explains why I am not married and don't even desire to be even in my late 40s, I can't stand this so called family thing.
@@danielkaya3608when you grow older that’s when having a family will count. It’s a good thing something to lean on emotionally when we are weak.
Editing required.
I realized that after years of marriage, then getting separated, that I was much happier alone. Going home from work and having to share my thoughts, and listen to my wife's thought was very difficult. A tough thing to accept, but you have to accept it.
Pretty well describes me. I'm 63, unmarried, live alone and I've been a loner all my life. Friends often get irritated with me because they say I seem to, "drop off the face of the earth" for long periods, which is true. I couldn't care less what people think about me. I was a successful independent systems consultant before I retired about 10 years ago. The exception is I DO enjoy a good party with friends and family, from time to time.
I could have written this!!!! ( Except I can wait validation in my work. I don't care though in my personal life.) Yes, I avoid this smart phone down for days!!!!
I'm the same way. I live alone and sometimes I don't leave the house for 2 or 3 days at a time. I like people but it's not my main goal to be hanging out with friends all the time and I DO have friends, lol. Most people would say I'm outgoing and friendly and I can actually be the life of the party when I'm in the mood, but I really enjoy spending time alone.
I do enjoy some people " only some!" but I am comfortable being alone.
I have been battling hip displacia for years, waiting to get my weight/A1c down so I can do surgery. I am 66, retired and live with my son. There are weeks when I don't leave my house due to mobility issues but as long as I have my dog, my books and a good movie, I'm living my best life!!
@@janismacolley2395 you seem to have everything that you need. A good book a good dog, heaven. ☺️
I have always been happiest when alone, to think my thoughts and do as I please. Fortunately, I was never really pushed to be "social" by my parents. I love the freedom of solitude.
I’m a born loner. I struggled as a child to be social like others but as an adult figured out that I’m essentially solitary by nature. A truly good book to me has always been like an interesting conversation, whereas small talk, parties and most people are just tedious. I’m contented and grateful now that I understand why that is.
It's quite easy to figure out that you're not a typical "small talker" when your words mostly fall upon deaf ears and confused faces, not that you're trying to impress people, but simply engage in a manner with which you're comfortable.
You have to find it amusing when most will be marveled by the things you seem to understand with ease...it's called spending most of your time in deep thought, studying the world around you, as opposed to frivolous interactions. 🤓
Exactly... being forced into social situations and playing "happy time" just to fit in is awful. Pick close friends very, very carefully.
I saw a sign on a bumper sticker that said. “ The more I get to know people, The more I love my dog “ 😂 So true.
It would be easier if you knew how you were supposed to be without having to learn the hard way.
@Steve H Yep I literally have broken a sweat and gotten exhausted trying to keep shallow conversation going
Since my divorce I have learned that being alone isn't near as bad as wishing you were.
Same here! Stole money from me and divorce lawyers are horrible!!!!
@@patriciavandevelde5469 Patricia
Sorry to hear about your lawyer. Mine wasn't cheap but I think he earned every penny. No idea what she would have cost me without my lawyer to defend me.
Very true! Been there & done that.
The loneliest I ever felt was when I was in a bad marriage. I divorced and never looked back, and rarely do I feel lonely now.
Classic 😊. Thomas.
I was told by a friend "You choose to be lonely", to which I replied "No, I choose to be alone. There is a difference." And I had another person tell me that I was cheating myself of happiness, to which I replied "I would rather be content than happy." Being a loner isn't exactly what I set out to do with my life, but life can deliver some pretty heavy blows, and in return, I picked myself up and decided to concentrate on myself instead of worrying about the world. After all, at the end of the day, when I close the door, it's just me and the dogs.
People who are lonely often don't chose it.
Sounds like you have a handle on things! A person can be in a room with 50 peple and still be alone.been there and done that .
Similarly, I have had people say I am being _selfish_ because I choose to spend time alone (but not lonely). Not one has been able to explain what they really mean when I challenge them on their statement ... it's almost like it's a stock response without any substance when people cannot reconcile the idea that some people choose to be alone.
I love being on my own, I do like to socialise too but when I know I have a weekend to myself I feel so much better. I know I can do what I want to do without any dictation from others, I don't make any plans, I just take the day as it comes.
@@alexrailton2067 sounds like me
I don't even own a cellphone! People can get me on my landline at home if they want to speak to me. I also don't answer my door if I'm not expecting anyone. I enjoy solitary pursuits. Go on vacations by myself. I hate social functions and have a go-to list of excuses every time...lol
Cell phones can actually help you to be alone more. For instance, you can go off exploring without having to ask anyone for directions, where to eat, etc.
@@pamelah848 I've already checked all that out before leaving home. 😏
Yes!!!! Love to be alone! Can’t be bothered with other people’s drama!
Love your name mrs/miss Peacewalker.
God bless you.
Kimothy 🇩🇰
Yea same here
There is absolutely nothing wrong with being alone. I crave it
100%with you😚🐈🐈🐈⬛💕🇺🇲
I see people going out getting very drunk and loud desperate for any kind of attention I feel sorry for them they much get taken advantage of alot
The greatest thing about being a "loner" is that you never actually ever really feel alone.
So true!
Exactly!
When you do nothing but sit your ass all day not sure what your good at it’s painful outcast
I'm a loner and therefore by choice I'm often alone ... but I'm never lonely.
On occasion I realize, that only out of necessity have I spoken to anyone and that always makes me smile.
Silence is the language of God and opens the mind to the spiritual side of life.
Splendid reply I never feel alone I have my sanctuary and I determine who , if any visitors are welcome. I am not a selfish or anti-social person, I am a man who's concern is my own security and serenity
Yup! I can’t stand people always on their phone! I like to work alone. I definitely love to live alone! No sharing anything and so what if the bed is a mess!😊
I really enjoy being alone more than anything...it feels like a vacation when you don't have to see or talk to anyone. I find a get anxiety when I'm around people so I feel way more comfortable when I'm by myself
💯
I find it strange in a way, but it's true. We're social creatures by design, yet there is a certain degree of anxiety being around others! Being the way "we are," we can "feel" the perceptions of others and know that it's much better to avoid the drama which they bring to the table! Being a "Loner," if this is the title we're given, means that we are more intuitive of what others think about us, so becoming selective, for us, we tend to watch others become involved with the petty jealousy and bickering that goes on around us, because we generally stay away from that B.S.!!!
Yes, I too, am a "Loner!"
And Proud of It!!!
Stay True to God and Yourself!!!
"When God Created You, HE Validated You/Us!" ✌️🙏❤️
I never had an issue with being a loner, it was my parents and teachers who had issues with it.
Yeah. Those people who think they know what's best for you. To hell with them! You are the boss of you!
True Words ❤❤
Exactly!!!
Hahah all the comments on my report cards from when I was a kid are, Lindsey does a good job with her work and behaves bla bla bla, but we wish she would work more in groups and with other kids
@@Lindsey578 bloody teachers eh?! They need something negative to say! My school work was never satisfactory alone or in a group.
I’m a loner who’s been married for 20 years and felt utterly alone and never heard or listened to the whole time I was married.
Now I’m separated living on my own and feeling more confident and comfortable with me being me and not having to be for others.
What you're describing is that you're bad at speaking up for yourself. Learn to speak up for yourself.
As long as don't forget compassion for others, helping the poor, sick and elderly, or your loner personality turns into big-time selfishness! One day you will be old, sick and frail
I was in a 22 year relationship and finally freed myself Best thing I ever did.
Thank you for sharing and I'm sure it's hard being separated to an extent. Sometimes we need space to feel whole again and you're doing just that. Hope you're doing very well, my friend :)
i'm with you :-)
I am 60 years old, and I have never been married. And I have no regrets.
You have missed a lot. To never love is to never live.
@@stephenkern5784he/she didnt say they didnt love
There is a big difference between being alone and being lonely. The loneliest I could ever be is in a room full of people. Small talk bores me.
I say the same thing all the time. And the folks most difficult to deal with are church people. One nosey old woman got angry when I provided 36 Bible verses on gossip (why they intrude to begin with). Most verses address "old women" specifically.
Facts
Too many people are full of the world
I used to have drinking & drugging buddies, not real friends.
Amen brother you hit the nail on the head. Godspeed
I had a doctor tell me in my late 20s that stress is the number one killer and underlying cause for many ailments and diseases. At the time I had two peptic ulcers, I was married in a nightmare scenario of drama and dysfunction, and I all of a sudden had these two bleeding ulcers which of course freaked me out.
I'm now 68 years old, been single ever since and the most happiest I have ever been, I happily consider myself an unsupervised adult.
And pretty much everything this video just mentioned I can 100% relate to without hesitation, anyway, I love people and I very much enjoy leaving them with a smile on their face, but the key word is, (( leaving )) them better than I found them.
Stay blessed everyone, enjoy your life to the fullest & remember to treat yourself kindly so as to be enabled to treat others the same.
I was in a abusive marriage 14 yrs., ended up with Ulcers, very painful. I'm a Nurse, so I knew why this happened to me. I left the marriage and within a year the Ulcers were gone !
Lovely and wise words right there!! ❤
True words
68 here as well, 9 years divorced and calmer than I think I've ever been since childhood. I like my time alone, very few friends, I've dumped the idiots and demanding ones (Covid lockdown actually helped 😂), I travel, eat out, study, fish, hike, motorbike, hike with my dog.
Since my divorce and being able to cease work life has become a haven of calm.
What about ur ulcer?Are u cured now?
I hear people say they get so lonely. I don’t, I love being alone. I don’t have any real friends and that’s fine with me.
I do not have any friends. Just the way I like it.
"Friends", no such thing... more like, use me till I either run out of whatever they need, or I drop them after waking up to the fact that I'm being used. Ended that cycle 20 years ago
@@JohnSmith-kq2ff lucky bastards
Very much me
I love being alone! Alone but not lonely.
I think with me being a loner, there's nobody there to disappoint you and make you feel bad. The best relationship you can have is the one with yourself 🖤🖤🖤
you do you but a little advice,dont be a loner out of fear do it out of pleshure,but its true the best relationship is the one with youreself ^^
Amen
I used to feel as though something was wrong with me when I was younger. Then I realized that it wasn't me but the rest of the world. When I got older I met another loner/introvert and ended up marrying her. Now I have a son and a daughter who are both loner/introverts and all of us are happy as hell.
Bravo!
Alone together!
That is lovely that you are all happy just been alone together and that is just how it used to be for my mom and I for we was just happy been alone together for we was both loners but we was so happy and always used to have a laugh for we both had a great sense of humour and we always used to do things together.
You were lucky!
That's wonderful!
There's nothing wrong with being alone. You don't have to follow what everyone else is doing. People get married, have families, but loners just want peace and to keep to themselves which I can relate. It's nice to see and hear from other loners out there.
Amen
my cousins for years pestered me on getting a girlfriend and dating then started asking if im gay its like no i just don't have the extra energy for another person atm i suffer multiple medical issues i don't need a partner i need peace and to be left to my plans and work. but they just don't seem to get that some of us don't want to deal with people
@@lordsathariel4384 :
Yeah, it would take a very special Wife to put up with me and my 45+ years of IBS !
@@lordsathariel4384 Have you ever experienced true love?
You shouldn't want to hear from anyone. lol
I’m a single guy at 24 years old and I enjoy my own company whatever I please. The whatever things I love doing. I respect myself, focusing on working alone in peace and live in spiritual life. No relationship, avoid complicated situations. Simple living and getting things together. Never get bored being alone. I feel 100% percent energize, than being around with others does drain my mood.
I love being alone and single.
I'm 63 and spend 99% of my time alone. I do many things or nothing at all. I have never been so happy and relaxed.
Me too man 63 alone and love the peace and freedom
so whats the 1% thing u dont do alone? oh let me guess...having to interact with a cashier when buying shit.
@@donkeylips8252 That's what Walmart online, Ebay, Amazon, grocery store online, and everything else online is made for. Or even self-check out. MAN, am I glad I live in the modern day, or I'd really be struggling having to deal with people all the time in 1890.
@@ARedMagicMarker Preach!
I wish I can make u happy by all means Ali cassidy
When I have tried to be outgoing and part of the crowd, it never worked and I only ended up being hurt. I'm 56 now and am finally accepting that I am a loner and this is what was intended for me. Such a relief to be alone and have peace and quiet. I don't even want my phone to ring these days.....90 percent of the time I regret picking it up. There are times I feel lonely - but a little loneliness is preferable to letting most people in. The freedom of being alone is amazing!
Happiness comes from within.
Most of the time, I find the conversations I have with myself much more interesting than ones I have with other people.
Exactly.
I prefer conversation with my cat instead of other people!
I find its the only way to get an intelligent conversation
Lol I stole this from my sister I’m funniest person I know!
@@jaya.0069 sometimes I wonder if my cats get annoyed with me. I’ll mutter something to myself and with their hearing they look at me. And I say yes! I was talking to myself. Stop judging me! Lololol
Being alone is the best. I hardly get hurt and i do things i want to do without judgements.
I scored 11 out of 11 here. I'm neither antisocial nor an introvert, I have a small group of extremely close friends, I come from a loving and supportive family, I have been in and out of a few relationships, but I have come to realize that the times in my life when I have been happiest are when I've been by myself. Now, at 63, I absolutely love my solitary -and wonderfully free - life and I embrace it with gusto. I have human contact from time to time, sure, and I (sometimes) enjoy it when I do, but I certainly don't crave it. Don't let anyone make you think there's something wrong with you if you're a "loner", because there isn't.
Best comment yet Markus, I wouldn't change a word. I enjoy people sometimes, but my social battery doesn't last that long. I despise being pressured into outings, family or work related especially. I'm getting better at saying NO, and feeling OK about it. I really don't need much of that. I avoid relationships after 2 long ones because I definitely don't want to meet their friends, family or kids. I feel I can barely stretch myself for my own friends & family!
Just wanted to add: Are you more interesting than my solitude?
@@richardallard3199 Well put.
Same age, same situation. Perfectly content.
Thank you ❤
Gosh this is deadly accurate! I have decided to log off both my FB and IG accounts temporarily because I just feel that the more I use them, the more I feel irritated by checking and not checking new messages! I became very obsessed with both and whenever I have some free time of my own, the first thing I would do is to check if there's any new uploads and notifications from both accounts! When the notifications start to pile up after just a day or two, I become anxious because I am afraid I might miss out on some important stuff on social media.
It has been 4 months since I logged off from both accounts, and I have no intention of going back! Staying away temporarily from social media does help clear your mind as you don't need to spend some going through those trivial, unimportant uploads!
I feel this and can’t imagine what it’s like not being like this. Meeting people that feel the same is deeply rewarding.
Yes! We understand each other and don't think we are weird.
Hey I agree J.N., this forum has been a complete eye-opener I did not realize I had so much in common with persons that actually share my most precious secret I was looked at as a freak during my childhood and now I see how much I gained in solitude, for me the price was just a pittence compared to the peace of mind afforded .As my life has played out at 66 I feel that my choice to be a loner was a wise method of self-preservation .