Self-Esteem Requires External Validation | Fred Neuhouser on Rousseau

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  • Опубликовано: 25 июл 2024
  • An interview with Fred Neuhouser on Rousseau's amour-propre.
    Some links to further guide your study:
    * Join my email list to be notified of future episodes: greatbooks.io
    * Full transcript: www.johnathanbi.com/p/transcr...
    Companion lectures & interviews:
    * Rousseau's first discourse lecture: • Science Is Poisoning Y...
    Professor Neuhouser's Book on Amour-Propre (affiliate):
    * Rousseau as Author: amzn.to/3LdOoqd
    * My book notes: www.johnathanbi.com/p/roussea...
    TIMESTAMPS
    00:00:00 Introduction
    00:02:23 Why We Desire External Validation
    00:16:24 How the Desire for Validation Leads us Astray
    00:37:38 The Dangers of Chasing Wealth
    00:48:02 Why the Desire for Validation is a GOOD Thing
    00:57:13 Stoicism: Can We Renounce the Desire for Validation?
    01:10:20 Is Madness Necessary for Greatness?
    01:16:38 How to Manage the Desire for Validation in Our Children

Комментарии • 49

  • @bi.johnathan
    @bi.johnathan  19 дней назад +4

    Some links to further guide your study:
    * Join my email list to be notified of future episodes: greatbooks.io
    * Full transcript: www.johnathanbi.com/p/transcript-for-fred-neuhouser-interview
    Companion lectures & interviews:
    * Rousseau's first discourse lecture: ruclips.net/video/C8ucJ29O1kM/видео.html
    Professor Neuhouser's Book on Amour-Propre (affiliate):
    * Rousseau as Author: amzn.to/3LdOoqd
    * My book notes: www.johnathanbi.com/p/rousseaus-theodicy-of-self-love-by
    TIMESTAMPS
    00:00:00 0. Introduction
    00:02:23 1. Why We Desire External Validation
    00:16:24 2. How the Desire for Validation Leads us Astray
    00:37:38 3. The Dangers of Chasing Wealth
    00:48:02 4. Why the Desire for Validation is a GOOD Thing
    00:57:13 5. Stoicism: Can We Renounce the Desire for Validation?
    01:10:20 6. Is Madness Necessary for Greatness?
    01:16:38 7. How to Manage the Desire for Validation in Our Children

  • @MC-oz5px
    @MC-oz5px 19 дней назад +30

    Im half this video and wondering: where the hell have you been all this time? Jesus dude you are GOOD. Nice to see quality content, you gained a subscriber!

  • @ParaSempreLuxo
    @ParaSempreLuxo 19 дней назад +14

    These philosophical discussions are a tour de force. Love it especially when its relatable and about human nature.

  • @mhammaddilshad9068
    @mhammaddilshad9068 19 дней назад +12

    Thanks Johnathan, While I'm watching this video, I'm in the lowest point of my self esteem, I ran my own start-up in my country(Iraq) and before that I had a good salary and good position, but I wasn't happy, becuase I felt like I deserve a better country to live, last year I moved to Germany, I started again, now I'm working a part time job and studying, and again I'm not happy, I feel like invisible and I don't feel the same status and respect that I had in my country, I hope that once again I will climb the ladder and achieve the same status and self respect in my new life, but one thing that I did in last couples of month is understanding myself through Philosophy.

    • @tomba77
      @tomba77 19 дней назад

      Don't ever,EVER give up...be strong, stay strong 💪

    • @bi.johnathan
      @bi.johnathan  19 дней назад +11

      Hey Mhammad, thanks for writing and sharing. Sounds a lot like when I got into philosophy. It was THE low point of my life: failed startup, relationship troubles. It was only through that experience that I realized how necessary philosophy was to help me live a better life. So, in the long run, it was a blessing in disguise. Without the pain and frustration I don't think I would have been nearly desperate enough to spend time reading those difficult old books that everyone was telling me I should read. So i hope philosophy can console you in your current struggles now and that you will walk out of this period with a lifelong appreciation for these books.

    • @gettoknowyourselfbetter.wo2362
      @gettoknowyourselfbetter.wo2362 14 дней назад

      ChatGPT answer to how to domesticate your amor prop:
      Domesticating or managing amor prop (the desire for recognition and esteem from others) involves several strategies aimed at fostering a healthy balance between external validation and intrinsic self-worth:
      1. **Cultivate Intrinsic Motivations:** Encourage activities and pursuits that foster genuine interest and passion in individuals. This can include hobbies, creative endeavors, and learning experiences that provide intrinsic satisfaction rather than relying solely on external praise.
      2. **Promote Self-Awareness:** Help individuals develop a strong sense of self-awareness and self-reflection. This includes understanding personal strengths and weaknesses, values, and goals beyond external expectations.
      3. **Encourage Self-Compassion:** Foster a mindset of self-compassion and acceptance. Teach individuals to be kind to themselves, especially in moments of failure or criticism, recognizing that self-worth is not solely dependent on external validation.
      4. **Focus on Personal Growth:** Shift the emphasis from comparing oneself to others towards personal growth and improvement. Encourage setting realistic goals and celebrating progress based on individual achievements rather than external benchmarks.
      5. **Teach Resilience:** Help individuals build resilience to setbacks and criticism. This involves developing coping strategies, problem-solving skills, and maintaining a positive outlook even in challenging situations.
      6. **Support Authentic Relationships:** Encourage meaningful connections based on genuine mutual respect and understanding rather than superficial admiration or validation-seeking behaviors.
      7. **Role Modeling and Guidance:** Provide positive role models and mentors who demonstrate healthy self-esteem and balanced relationships with recognition and validation.
      By integrating these approaches, individuals can develop a more balanced and resilient sense of self-esteem that incorporates both intrinsic motivations and healthy social interactions, thereby domesticating amor prop in a constructive manner.

  • @botieno3687
    @botieno3687 18 дней назад +2

    Hello Johnathan, ohh my goodness how do you achieve such levels of concentration? The way you phrase and rephrase the other party wordings after he is done talking without getting out of the brackets is absolutely genius. Infact the other party admits at some point "that is what I was trying to say" says a lot of how good you are at paying attention.
    I am truly honored to cross path with you through your inspiring videos in this lifetime.
    Much love from Kenya, Africa.

  • @UnemployedProfessors
    @UnemployedProfessors 18 дней назад +3

    The podcast we never knew we needed

  • @yeabsirasefr6209
    @yeabsirasefr6209 14 дней назад +1

    production is absolutely unmatched

  • @zdmdirect358
    @zdmdirect358 19 дней назад +3

    Love from New Zealand Happy I discovered your channel the wisdom and value is Awesome : ) Legend !!!

  • @tibinjohn8752
    @tibinjohn8752 18 дней назад +1

    Don’t stop! These are so helpful and compelling 👏🏽👏🏽🙏🏽

  • @WtfOmw
    @WtfOmw 19 дней назад +2

    I can’t wait to see this amazing channel gain more traction. Your work is hidden gold waiting to be mined. I’m excited for the future content that awaits us viewers.

    • @bi.johnathan
      @bi.johnathan  19 дней назад +3

      Can't wait for you to see it what's coming down the pipeline.

  • @mekdev
    @mekdev 17 дней назад

    As a leader, I find this talk the insight I didn't know I needed. Amazing work!

  • @Delta19G
    @Delta19G 18 дней назад +1

    Im figuratively in love with all your work

  • @zeoMalitza
    @zeoMalitza 13 дней назад +3

    Commenting on 40k followers cause this channel is about to blow up

    • @samuelwilson3815
      @samuelwilson3815 47 минут назад

      I am even in shock to see 43k now, because last two weeks was just less that 20k...
      It's really going to blow up...

  • @pilotmus3981
    @pilotmus3981 16 дней назад

    I went through the video hearing Amour-Prop and have no idea what that meant, overall very insightful video and conversation

  • @NoOne-yp1hv
    @NoOne-yp1hv 19 дней назад +1

    Erich Fromm NEXT! Great Content. Thank you!

  • @heartbrakeB
    @heartbrakeB 14 дней назад

    Great rooms Jonathan!
    I’m really happy you did more books [= Thank you 😊

  • @zeoMalitza
    @zeoMalitza 13 дней назад

    Also waiting for your videos on power!!

  • @DrBeast-ky4bd
    @DrBeast-ky4bd 19 дней назад +2

    Great content

  • @joveke13
    @joveke13 17 дней назад

    That’s a big difference/leap from computer science to philosophy. Keep up the good work, I love philosophy as well, but exploring different approaches to ideas 💡 🤷🏾‍♂️💯

  • @TheAmbientJournal
    @TheAmbientJournal 19 дней назад +2

    I think you should have a discussion like this with Hamza Tzortzis or Mohammed Hijab.
    Great stuff!

  • @PathAndPlay
    @PathAndPlay 13 дней назад +1

    Perhaps inflamed amour-propre doesn't create greatness but creates a "handle" or "identity" around which greatness can be recognized.
    E.g. given our technological advancement, it's very likely that we'd always eventually get online shopping, electric cars, smartphones, AI, nuclear weapons, etc... Just not with the specific brand name and individuals that we currently associate with them.
    That is, like the "ego" or the self-awareness that gets in the way of flow states, it's a distracting desire to take credit for "me" for a result that would have happened wu-wei-esque regardless of "my" intervention

  • @Alazar_03
    @Alazar_03 19 дней назад +2

    You got a new subscriber

  • @jamm_affinity
    @jamm_affinity 19 дней назад +2

    I think that Nietzsche put all of his faith in gaining the recognition of the philosophers of the future over the people in his time. He sacrificed his body and mind because that recognition was more important than his body in this life.
    I think that this is what he admired in Jesus. Nietzsche in this light is like the philosopher version of Jesus.

  • @tedy26now
    @tedy26now 19 дней назад +1

    The venue ❤

    • @bi.johnathan
      @bi.johnathan  19 дней назад +1

      Thanks it was the Berlin Altes Museum. They were kind enough to let us use it for free. Although to be frank I think that this venue lacks intimacy and the audio came out pretty echo-y so will do more library settings going forward.

    • @SS-kg8rj
      @SS-kg8rj 19 дней назад +1

      @@bi.johnathan the echo was fine and added to the depth of what was being discussed imo

    • @bi.johnathan
      @bi.johnathan  19 дней назад

      @@SS-kg8rj haha thanks. glad someone at least likes it

  • @dudigozal
    @dudigozal 12 дней назад +1

    Wow nice scenery . But Give the poor guy a glass of water.

  • @rivandimursal8495
    @rivandimursal8495 18 дней назад +1

    I like ur video

  • @Je_suis_Jefe
    @Je_suis_Jefe 18 дней назад +1

    The words Amour-Propre means Love-Clean or pure love in a sense. What Rousseau defines as pure love or amour-propre is the question 🤔

    • @malcolmcouturier6993
      @malcolmcouturier6993 17 дней назад +1

      Propre can have a few different meanings, including clean, but in this case it means something along the lines of self. In common language amour-propre, therefore, means self-love, elf-esteem or even vanity.

  • @loppt34
    @loppt34 7 дней назад

    He speaks just like Peter thiel

  • @Siferlash
    @Siferlash 15 дней назад

    15:44 is a very good point! It is not good for man to be alone

  • @calbar8793
    @calbar8793 18 дней назад

    The premise of your argument on receiving external validation or not for self-merit is binary, which makes it incompatible with reality. External validation should be viewed on a continuum (lifespan), not discretely. For instance, if you received enough validation on xyz ability as a child, you don’t necessitate it as an adult, to any extent of, in order to not go mad or be narcisistic.
    While I appreciate your historicism philosophical deep dives, I think you would benefit by taking an accredited course in logic. Otherwise you will make a claim like that, in the essence of Rousseau or otherwise, and simply have a misidentified antecedent

    • @bi.johnathan
      @bi.johnathan  18 дней назад +1

      I agree with you that the relationship is like a reservoir model - that is across a life. But where did we suggest otherwise. The claim was never “you constantly need external validation to sustain self-esteem.” In fact, that’s what Neuhouser is getting at with his example of having received recognition early in his career such that the possible rejection of his essay will not be devastating.

  • @coreonlewis8713
    @coreonlewis8713 11 дней назад

    41k followers with this type of content??

  • @TheGreekGodOfWallStreet
    @TheGreekGodOfWallStreet 17 дней назад

    Neuhouser’s theory that war is better for the environment than capitalism is comical in that it completely ignores technological advancement and escalation. Yes capitalism drives modern technological advancement but even today a great deal of technological innovation spawns from military research. To assume the bomb would not have existed without capitalism is too simple. We may have taken a different path to its discovery but the science is foundational. In such a world where conquest was still in such high regard, would there be the same restraint with regard to nuclear annihilation? Even in a non-nuclear world, war is plenty destructive. I found it hopelessly “Academic” for him to make this argument.

  • @Mathematchit
    @Mathematchit 7 дней назад

    In a way, this sitting is kind of boring and stale, hard to finish but, at least i try.

  • @los1353
    @los1353 19 дней назад

    “The warriors were better” lol bro what

  • @BrianDeRosa
    @BrianDeRosa 18 дней назад +2

    @bi.johnathan - how can we support this new project of yours ?

    • @bi.johnathan
      @bi.johnathan  18 дней назад

      Share with your friends if you have any that would be interested! And if you have the $ to spare, become a paid subscriber at greatbooks.io