Thank you for sharing such wisdom! I wish I had this wisdom when I was younger as I had been in this situation, felt the same way, did not know how to get out of it, and wasted 6 years with someone I didn’t love.
Am I the only one that thinks that the act of making love (which is different than having sex) is much more sacred than this? I'm not religious but doing the deed the first day you meet a girl doesn't sit right with me. Having intercourse is something that shouldn't be rushed so much
I completely agree The deed is such an intimate thing to do with someone It's way more than just physical It's emotionally, physically, and (in my opinion) spiritually connecting with someone
Just ended a 6 year relationship this is so true. The decision fatigue of spending so long trying to hang on to a relationship that is fundamentally misaligned because of the emotional connection is so draining. The daily mental gymnastics to suppress your fantasies about another life. The constant arguments, the negotiations, the self-suppression to please them. So relieved and I’m already eating better, sticking to the routine, flourishing creatively. She’s a good person and all, things just became resentful for both of us because of how much we had to sacrifice within ourselves to be together. It’s interesting how we can think we’re so rational, but love makes us do such foolish things. This one carved the lesson into my bones. Objectivity and delayed gratification are critical in choosing a partner.
Love makes us do foolish things, or lust? Love doesn’t harbor resentment, it doesn’t keep track of wrong-doing, it’s patient and kind, it’s everything that the Word says that it is.
@@TheThe-sn1wc I think it's a matter of knowing yourself full, first. If we are solid in who we are, we can then choose not to compromise on the values we require in our partner. And we have to be disciplined with rejecting someone who doesn't meet them, without having a cold heart obv. That's the skill. It's better to be single, focused on your own growth, than to compromise for convenience or lust or out of loneliness. The irony is when you walk in that, you're more likely to find the right one.
@@liam.morrow hmm i agree. Just for some perspective though, i have ben doing that my whole life till now (27) and you’re right that I am clear on what I don’t want, but I lost out on other lessons u do learn while in a relationship. So I think it can be a healthy balance to have something to learn from before you do start your self discovery journey :)
Dang perfect timing, me and my girl are saving sex after marriage. We prayed to God to remove lust from our relationship. And doing that is making our relationship a shit load tons better
Hamza is such a g for exposing his personal life and the mistakes he made for our benefit. You've helped me a lot bro, and I'll always be grateful for you. I'll be here whenever you need, brother❤️
LESSONS. #1 Be careful of lust pulling you towards the wrong person. (10:23) #2 Wait as long as possible before you have sex with the person that youre considering. (11:43) #3 Keep vetting her hard. (13:27) #4 Stay true to your morals and values. (16:33) #5 Your gut feeling is right. (23:08) #6 To not allow your emotions/attraction/excitement/sx/lust to be your guiding force for who you should pursue. (23:47)
What your teaching man is somewhat complementary and the same to what the bible teaches, wish you get more Closer to God bro, for sure you will never regret it. Praying for you Hamza, love you man !♥️💪
I am a girl .I don't know if anyone sees it. But I am victim of someone fantasy and yes I was aware that it was lust since he never was sure bout marrying me. And it's always disturb him whenever I bring that topic. We loved eachother.we compromised, go back nd forth for month. But it just didn't worked out. I am so sad but also feeling so strong that I became able to take the decision..
I've been feeling this a lot lately, I've noticed every girl I've been with, I haven't really been their friend. I want my next relationship to be my best friend, before becoming my girlfriend.
This is exactly where I'm at and wish more guys would view relationships this way. A wise woman also isn't blinded by list and the immature mindset of the the "friend zone". I won't want to spend my life with someone or even sleep with them if we're not best friends first. The friend one is a good place to be men! And there's so much value in genuine men/women relationships - I would die for my guy friends and treat them as I do my girl friends and we learn so much from eachother!
This man is learning in real time right in front of us. This is what it looks like for a normal person to experience things and learn from it, except his life is on full display.
What about that,me and my bf were in a ,as I thought,commited relationship, but for the reasons you mentioned I wanted to wait with intimacy, and he respected it, but then started betraying me and finally left for a third party. Now, 4 months later, he called me,said he is sorry and wants to reconcile.
Same happened to me with my ex-girlfriend. I new from day one she will Never be my wife but I still ended up in a relationship with her just for the access to Sex. Did’nt have the balls back then. Even told her I loved her, 100% lie. It’s disgusting what men will do out of pure lust. Today I’m mostly retaining my seed and I can see and choose clearly.
If you are going through some stuff Hamza , remember that there are people who will always stand by you and that those are the people you should value most. I can't speak for other people but I genuinely appreciate life lessons like this especially since I don't have a father. Thank you bro , stay strong
hamza has been searching for ''something'' for the last few years, moving back and fourth etc. in that time my life has changed so much it's crazy. but i know exactly what he has been longing for...and thats god.
Lust fades away in few months to few years. And you dont feel attracted to the woman anymore. Always we need something genuinely more than lust to stay in a happy relationship. Something like a mind to mind, a genuine connection.
This is why in Islam God says stay away from fornication and instead find someone to marry then love, harmony and peace will enter no tho your lives and hearts. My belief, my opinion and this is only a piece of advice not critique so whoever can benefit from my comment then I am glad and whoever couldn’t careless, I don’t mind either 😂❤🎉I have my feedback and yes I agree with most of what he said on this video. Blessings and stay educated everyone!
Hi Hamza. I am a 24 year old guy who is from Turkey. I discovered you from your 'Delete Instagram Now' kinda video 2-3 years ago. It made me teary you saying that 'No one really reached out to me and ask me if I was OK.' and 'It's always sad to see a comments like ...now I dislike him.' Fuck. I have ups and downs, I have times where I make very intelligent and good decisions and there are times that I don't. Which is fuckin okay because that is the description of life. It is very hard almost impossible to sit a fuckin chair and talk about your absolute failures with such opennes to the whole world. You are a big brother to me. You have changed my life for the better. I really like you with all my heart. I hope that you keep doin what you are doing. Lastly, that video has so much value in it that I really wish that every man sees that. Love you. Take care of yourself. (English is not my main language, sorry for the mistakes or the formality :).)
Good food for thought here thank you. I realised that when I take the lust away from my ex relationship there was very little of substance left hence one of the reasons she’s now my ex !!!
Yeh true. So much things related in this vid that even myself cant tell the right words/answer to my friends why i chose to brokeup with her, even she is so cute, clingy, and made me feel loved again. I know my decision is true. And jn from hearing hamza's words.. i know im in the right path.. Alhamdulillah.
just broke up with my girlfriend a few days ago after 10 months... this explains it perfectly, however sex was not apart of the question as we were both waiting till marriage. Once that honeymoon phase ended we were able to pick out incompatibility. We wanted different things, and different archetype of person. She was amazing and of course ill miss her but i know the future is bright for both of us.
I’m a female and have only been with my two ex husbands. My value is i dont sleep with men outside of marriage. BUT it’s made this “dating” process that much harder for me, men seem to only have sex on their mind, or atleast expect “sexy talk”. I lose all interest and respect for them instantly and cut them off. Or am i being too judgy? Can good men with good intentions also have that mindset of checking how sexual we women are before committing?
When you have everything you ever wanted in life and youre still miserable, youre legit cooked. Literally your dopamine receptors have maxxed out. Thats why i refrain from most pleasure as possible. When you live stoically the simple mundane things bring so much bliss it doesnt even make sense
It’s crazy because when he made that video I knew he was lying. I could tell he was just tired of her. He wanted to smash other chicks but didn’t know how to tell her and didn’t want to be judged by these lil 16 year old dudes who haven’t experienced real life.
The same way easy access to prn is so damaging, the same can be said for easy access to women. Except it can be worse because there's another person involved and they're getting damaged too
At the end of the day, Hamza, you make videos on the experiences you’ve had and the lessons you’ve learnt in life. As humans, we never stop gaining experiences and learning new things. Our opinions change based on new information that we learn, so you “changing your opinion on certain things” all the time is just a natural human tendency. We make mistakes, and that’s what half of the stories you tell us are about - mistakes that you e made in the past. Just because the story is from more recent times, people think they can get angry about it, not sure why, because there’s still a lesson in there, which is why we all subscribe to you - for the lessons you’ve learnt and are teaching us. If anything, the fact that you’re actually addressing it all and still being open enough to share these contradicting opinions and new experiences you’ve gained knowledge from, is very respectable, as you know the backlash you’ll get for it, yet you still do it. You do the difficult task, even when you know the hard consequences. Respect. Keep it going bro, looking forward to seeing where the future takes you. 👊💪🤝
I won’t lie, the emount of women who have never had a hookup that aren’t judging their potential partner for tons of hookups may be 0 on earth. By nature people who have never done a thing, typically don’t do the thing because they despise or see it as beneath them. And they extend their personal standards upon other people, as we typically do when we resist something based on principle. We’d expect it of others we trust. Honestly if a woman has never hooked up and is ok with what you do, I’d be seriously concerned something may be actually wrong with her in some other way. So yes, it is a double standard
As a Russian Christian I'm happy to see Hamza starting to understand some truth. Finally he seems to be more mature and started to talk about really important things. I have been watching Hamza infrequently for 1-2 years with understanding that he's not telling the right things. Hook up's have bad consequences and nobody talks about that (even in Russia). Only in 35-50 years of age when your wife devorces you and takes all the kids when your whole life is ruined you take the punishment of your younger choices. I have seen hundreds of such stories. I hope Hamza will realize all the important things before such a story will happen to him (the bad consequences of hook up are a very small part of all the things you need to know before marriage).
How does you sleeping around as a 20 year old cause your wife to divorce you 15 years later. That doesn't make sense. Wouldn't she have not married u in the first place if u sleeping around in your youth was such a problem
@@moejohnson2132 There are 3 big bad consequences of having hook up. First consequence. Have you ever noticed that you can't enjoy things for a long time? You bye a phone or a car, you can really enjoy it, you take care of it, you love it. But after few years you get used to that thing and it can't bring you joy. First holding hands, first kiss, first sex. All that is awesome. But after few years you still get used to that and it can't bring you that much joy that was bringing to you in the past. There are two ways to maintain the level of joy in your life. First way is the path of pleasure. You just bye a better phone/car when your current one doesn't bring you joy. Couples start to bye things in sex shop, start to experiment with anal, role games, bdsm. They do it just to diversify their sex life. But they'll get used to that also, so they experiment further. One day a man can realize that prostate is a cool thing and maybe it will very good if his wife would fuck him with strapon 🤠. He can also realize that idea of cheating starts to turn him on very much. At that point he can either cheat himself or watch his wife fuck another dude. But all this perverted things started from innocent vibrator and anal experiments. Don't you think some people are born being perverted? No. They become perverted on their pleasure path. The main problem of this path is that it's endless. You will always need to do crazier and crazier things, eat more delicious food, buy better car or you will not be happy. On this path you will get short-term pleasure but it's nothing compared to long-term unhappiness that you'll get. If you dream about money you are on this path. If you dream about sex, trips, girls, popularity you are on this path. If you dream about attention, beauty, brand clothes, newest iPhone, better car you are on this path. If you had hook up's, if you start relationships with a girl without intention to build a family with her in the future you are on the path of pleasure. If you choose a girl only based on how you feel with her you are on this path. If you can say things like "I can't live without her" you are on this path (this words has nothing to do with true love). Sometimes it's enough to hear a person's meaning of life and goal in life to understand person's path. The alternative to this path is abstaining. That is the only effective and healthy way to maintain happiness and joy in your life. You see, only when you're hungry you truly enjoy food. Only when you haven't listened the music for a long time you can hear the actual beauty of all sounds. Every time when you have a hook up you trade off your ability to love and enjoy your future wife to just have a bit of short pleasure. Also every hook up pushes you further into path of pleasure, It'll be very hard for you to get off of this, it's an addiction.
@@moejohnson2132 Second consequence. Why do you think you will not cheat on your future wife? You can say "Why would I cheat when I have a wife that I love? I just don't need to. I'm a kind person. I'm not the one who can cheat". And that is the most naive thing I heard in my life. It's like saying "Why would I have the urge to drink cola, eat fast-food, smoke, masturbate when I can have a diet, be healthy, train every day, go to bed early". As I said previously you can have the most pleasure in the start of relationship, but later you will get used to this. You will have to fight the urge to look at other girls. Even Jesus Christ had to fight Satan's temptations. We all have and will have the urge to sin. In my life it's easy to get a girl. It's hard to resist lust when you have all the opportunities, when you can just text 2-3 girls and have sex with one of them that same day. One day I had very hard temptation. I even lost the fight and agreed to come to her place. But on the next day (day of meeting) I canceled the meeting. I felt so happy because I realized very important thing. There was nothing that stoped me from getting laid. I had no relationships, I didn't have to pay anything, It was just free and pure pleasure. And if I resisted it this means that when I will have a wife, children, family (i.e. things that stop you from sin), I will definitely not cheat. "I know how bad of a person I am and THAT'S why I will not cheat" - that is the right answer. When you don't have experience in resisting lust, I don't think you can be a good person. There is a high chance that you will cheat. Third consequence. When you are not on the right path, when you don't resist temptations, when you choose woman based only on your feelings and not on important principals, you just physically or metaphysically can't have a good wife in your life. Why? Because you can't smell the dirt in human when you have such in yourself. There is a law in relationships. It says "Like attracts like". Your future girl will be as much sinful and lustful as you are. So there will be no surprise when such a girl will cheat while being a wife and having a children. There are more bad consequences, but I told about the main 3 that I know.
I think waiting for months until u are sure Ur attracted to this person, doesn't mean you overcame lust. I think the problem here is relationships out of marriage. both partners will slowly lose interest and motivation. sometimes it's not a correct gut feeling telling you this person is bad and not meeting Ur values. sometimes your just over it, because nothing is motivating you to be better together. so my advise be fully in and do it right or just don't!
What Hamza mentioned at 19:57 about a girl with past hookups, I feel the same way, however if I'm in an amazing relationship with a girl who has had hookups (even if just in the form of failed relationship attempts), should I cut things off for that one issue? I guess only my gut feeling can answer that. Also, most girls now have had hookups, (even relationship-oriented women with good values), so what is one to do, be single forever?
You should make a video about what you have to contribute to a girl other than muscles and money. These are shallow attributes that don’t attract traditional virgins like me
Really, really good video. This is genuinely a gem. I disagree that there's no point to figuring out your values more intentionally though - because your gut feeling is strongly influenced / disrupted by the society you grew up in, and some of the values perpetuated by that society can be very bad. So really figuring out what's you and what is outside influence in a calm, secluded context is important for a lot of folks. Especially young men who grew up with the influences of woke culture, if they want to be able to trust their gut feeling or rather be able to tell it apart from the brainwashing. It's really just reflection, like on anything else.
Glad more n more men are speaking .. light enters self awakened, it enable people come together only with true love. Energy refills once the draining effect leaves.
Good talk bro, nice to see such a deep dive into someone else's insight into relationships. I just want to highlight that it is important to talk to the person you are interested in and see if they are aware of their own shortcomings and are willing to work and overcome them. People change and grow when willing and motivated. Up to you to gauge and recognize where that person's mindset is and so it is essential to talk about the things Hamza pointed out. Relationships can be difficult because there can be friction when you tell each other about your own shortcomings but if you are willing to grow together be honest with yourself and each other and stick through the difficulty of being criticized and understand someone else's point of view I think that's the pinnacle of a great relationship and love. And as Hamza said if your goals/values and path don't align you need to be able to recognize that and be able to move on even though it can be hard especially if you have become close. Which is why I understand that being aware and not letting lust control your decisions is very important.
Sometimes there can be reasons too as to why someone thinks the way they do if you love them and want to see them grow you may need to hold their hand and help get them through certain mental barriers. But you can only really do this if the other person is open and willing to change and trusts you and as said before has the same values and ambitions. You can't forcibly change people they'll always inherently move towards what their personal values are and what they gravitate towards.
And the moment he seems like he's starting to show some humility he just goes "oh no no I'm successful btw totally not a loser" which makes me feel like he's quite insecure beneath the surface
Why does it take men so long to figure this out? Also, that is how relationships are. The lust and infatuation stage always fades after some time. That’s why your relationship has to be built on a solid foundation from the very beginning. If you always leave after the lust and infatuation stage ends you’ll never be in a long-term, solid relationship. So you still need to mature more and develop your relationship skills. After listening to this whole video, you are too immature to be passing out relationship advice. This “advice” is detrimental to young men.
Brother just a thought. I have been with my wife for 9 years and we have 4 children together. I noticed you said values don’t change but from my experience they do. It’s a part of growing together rather than as an individual. Also from my experience. It does help to logically analyze and write down your values the same as it would for anything probably. Also the same for emotions. If you lead with them, you may be convinced by your own insecurities or bias rather than being objective about your opinion. Anyway, I thoroughly enjoy your videos thank you so much for sharing your experience proud of you!
You want to marry a girl who hasn’t had any hookups. I respect that decision so immensely but I got one question. How do you ensure that this is really the case? As you said, the possibility she won’t be honest about it is there. Especially when she finds out your view on that. That’s also the reason why women lie about their real body count. I personally have had similar thoughts my whole life, even how can I really love a girl who already has been intimate with other dudes, not only in that hookup way but even has had relationships. I think if being honest, it fuggs with every dude’s mind, not only the stereotypical “incel’s” one, when he thinks about it that other dudes have had his future wife who he is supposed to love and to care about. Somehow this is the curse of the modern time and as you say, when you grow older you see that the religious view on sexuality actually makes much sense. But I don’t mean to spam too much, I just find it interesting to hear your opinion how to make sure a girl is honest about what she says in terms of her past
How the heck can you be so spot on 😅
Thank you for sharing such wisdom! I wish I had this wisdom when I was younger as I had been in this situation, felt the same way, did not know how to get out of it, and wasted 6 years with someone I didn’t love.
Lust truly is one of the worst addictions as it destroys not only the body, but also the soul
Your right.
Agreed
@@PerseveranceIsKey-10 i feel your pain, it truly is a struggle to escape its claws, however every hard chalange comes with a just reward
Yeah true similar to drug addictions
Absolutely. It almost destroyed me. Most only stop when they get a disease they can't get rid of...
Did u delete some videos?
Man Hamza is so real. Telling this story so vulnerably.
Thanks bro, spit on it next time
This man changes his entire life trajectory every other day, then calls you soy because you're not disciplined/consistent enough.
@@777goncharovvbro 😭
@@777goncharovvmay as well swallow at that point 😂
@@777goncharovv 😂😂
That was Beautiful My Brother, In a Manly Way👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
I guess having double standards isn't fine
I Hope a lot of Young men & women will listen to this!
All humans need to spend a few months hanging out as friends only...if you want to land a relationship.
Thanks much I get it now I was feeling miserable 😭 but now I embrace it. She was not meant for me.
Am I the only one that thinks that the act of making love (which is different than having sex) is much more sacred than this? I'm not religious but doing the deed the first day you meet a girl doesn't sit right with me. Having intercourse is something that shouldn't be rushed so much
I completely agree
The deed is such an intimate thing to do with someone
It's way more than just physical
It's emotionally, physically, and (in my opinion) spiritually connecting with someone
@RookyRxb57 Exactly
I strongly agree, i view people less and their relationship as more shallow when i learn they’ve done that
Marriage first
When you are making love in marriage. You are becoming one under God.
everything you believe might crumble if you read the book Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki
The GOAT is consistent
Thanks bro, spit on it next time
bro really jinxed it
Bro cursed it
Its over
"I always knew I wasn't gonna marry her" man that hurts.
But its very mature of you to initiate the breakup, so U don't waste each others time.
Just ended a 6 year relationship this is so true. The decision fatigue of spending so long trying to hang on to a relationship that is fundamentally misaligned because of the emotional connection is so draining. The daily mental gymnastics to suppress your fantasies about another life. The constant arguments, the negotiations, the self-suppression to please them. So relieved and I’m already eating better, sticking to the routine, flourishing creatively. She’s a good person and all, things just became resentful for both of us because of how much we had to sacrifice within ourselves to be together. It’s interesting how we can think we’re so rational, but love makes us do such foolish things. This one carved the lesson into my bones. Objectivity and delayed gratification are critical in choosing a partner.
Love is a sacrifice
Love makes us do foolish things, or lust? Love doesn’t harbor resentment, it doesn’t keep track of wrong-doing, it’s patient and kind, it’s everything that the Word says that it is.
How do we find someone we don’t have to compromise so much for though
@@TheThe-sn1wc I think it's a matter of knowing yourself full, first. If we are solid in who we are, we can then choose not to compromise on the values we require in our partner. And we have to be disciplined with rejecting someone who doesn't meet them, without having a cold heart obv. That's the skill. It's better to be single, focused on your own growth, than to compromise for convenience or lust or out of loneliness. The irony is when you walk in that, you're more likely to find the right one.
@@liam.morrow hmm i agree. Just for some perspective though, i have ben doing that my whole life till now (27) and you’re right that I am clear on what I don’t want, but I lost out on other lessons u do learn while in a relationship. So I think it can be a healthy balance to have something to learn from before you do start your self discovery journey :)
This video is so informative i love it brotha.
Dang perfect timing, me and my girl are saving sex after marriage. We prayed to God to remove lust from our relationship. And doing that is making our relationship a shit load tons better
Real, I need a gf to marry 10 years later
@@SheluSMapakowhy 10 years later?
lol
He is just like us
Hamza is such a g for exposing his personal life and the mistakes he made for our benefit.
You've helped me a lot bro, and I'll always be grateful for you.
I'll be here whenever you need, brother❤️
Thanks bro, spit on it next time
I honestly think he shouldn't talk about his sexual experience with her cause that will decrease her smv
It’s to his benefit to make money off of this video lol.
@@negativephantom9590don’t use the term SMV that makes you sound like a loser.
@@777goncharovv nah bro you bugging 😂
I love this advice but my biggest fear is if I'm holding off on sex while dating and she gets it elsewhere during that time period
No good woman would do this - if she does you know she isn't for you!
LESSONS.
#1 Be careful of lust pulling you towards the wrong person. (10:23)
#2 Wait as long as possible before you have sex with the person that youre considering. (11:43)
#3 Keep vetting her hard. (13:27)
#4 Stay true to your morals and values. (16:33)
#5 Your gut feeling is right. (23:08)
#6 To not allow your emotions/attraction/excitement/sx/lust to be your guiding force for who you should pursue. (23:47)
What your teaching man is somewhat complementary and the same to what the bible teaches, wish you get more Closer to God bro, for sure you will never regret it. Praying for you Hamza, love you man !♥️💪
I am a girl .I don't know if anyone sees it. But I am victim of someone fantasy and yes I was aware that it was lust since he never was sure bout marrying me. And it's always disturb him whenever I bring that topic. We loved eachother.we compromised, go back nd forth for month. But it just didn't worked out. I am so sad but also feeling so strong that I became able to take the decision..
the book Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki is what everyone avoids because it’s too real
Went thru the same
I've been feeling this a lot lately, I've noticed every girl I've been with, I haven't really been their friend. I want my next relationship to be my best friend, before becoming my girlfriend.
not best friend i'd say, u just gotta actually get to know her first and see if you're actually compatible with each other
@ why not best friend, if youre gonna spend years together with them why would you not want them to be your best friend?
This is exactly where I'm at and wish more guys would view relationships this way. A wise woman also isn't blinded by list and the immature mindset of the the "friend zone". I won't want to spend my life with someone or even sleep with them if we're not best friends first. The friend one is a good place to be men! And there's so much value in genuine men/women relationships - I would die for my guy friends and treat them as I do my girl friends and we learn so much from eachother!
This man is learning in real time right in front of us. This is what it looks like for a normal person to experience things and learn from it, except his life is on full display.
society would change overnight if more people read the book Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki
Bro stop slipping into degeneracy and get back on that grind, you inspire us to now it's your turn. You got this man Ik you have it in you.
17:31 was the highlight
What about that,me and my bf were in a ,as I thought,commited relationship, but for the reasons you mentioned I wanted to wait with intimacy, and he respected it, but then started betraying me and finally left for a third party. Now, 4 months later, he called me,said he is sorry and wants to reconcile.
He ain't ready, move on - actions speak louder than words!
Same happened to me with my ex-girlfriend. I new from day one she will Never be my wife but I still ended up in a relationship with her just for the access to Sex. Did’nt have the balls back then. Even told her I loved her, 100% lie.
It’s disgusting what men will do out of pure lust. Today I’m mostly retaining my seed and I can see and choose clearly.
what are the signs tho? if you would warn your daughter about a relationship like that?
Man I love this guy genuine advice he has learned from his own life imagine having a big brother like this irl that would be cool as hell
Your name is HAMZA 😢 May Allah guide you
I am sorry brother. We are with you. You are a strong man.
There's something not cute about you sharing to many details but I'm sure it helps some people
If you are going through some stuff Hamza , remember that there are people who will always stand by you and that those are the people you should value most. I can't speak for other people but I genuinely appreciate life lessons like this especially since I don't have a father. Thank you bro , stay strong
Same, I don't have a father too
hamza has been searching for ''something'' for the last few years, moving back and fourth etc. in that time my life has changed so much it's crazy. but i know exactly what he has been longing for...and thats god.
Exactly!
A fact. Believe in loving past your body….your soul connects to your spirit so dig deep into WHO U R.
Yes
Imagine he ends up settling with a Pakistani woman💀😂😂😂😂😂 typical brown boy behaviour
Islam won't fulfill him.
Love these conversations 🙏
Lust fades away in few months to few years. And you dont feel attracted to the woman anymore. Always we need something genuinely more than lust to stay in a happy relationship. Something like a mind to mind, a genuine connection.
You’re a great communicator bro.
Thank you Hamza. You changed my life ❤
Fantastic growth here brother. I'm impressed. Well done
Brother disapeared again
Yep. I was looking for an explanation but no one said anything.
Love you bro ! More power to you
Epic. Last few month's content has been revolutionary.
This is why in Islam God says stay away from fornication and instead find someone to marry then love, harmony and peace will enter no tho your lives and hearts. My belief, my opinion and this is only a piece of advice not critique so whoever can benefit from my comment then I am glad and whoever couldn’t careless, I don’t mind either 😂❤🎉I have my feedback and yes I agree with most of what he said on this video. Blessings and stay educated everyone!
Hi Hamza. I am a 24 year old guy who is from Turkey. I discovered you from your 'Delete Instagram Now' kinda video 2-3 years ago. It made me teary you saying that 'No one really reached out to me and ask me if I was OK.' and 'It's always sad to see a comments like ...now I dislike him.' Fuck. I have ups and downs, I have times where I make very intelligent and good decisions and there are times that I don't. Which is fuckin okay because that is the description of life. It is very hard almost impossible to sit a fuckin chair and talk about your absolute failures with such opennes to the whole world. You are a big brother to me. You have changed my life for the better. I really like you with all my heart. I hope that you keep doin what you are doing. Lastly, that video has so much value in it that I really wish that every man sees that. Love you. Take care of yourself. (English is not my main language, sorry for the mistakes or the formality :).)
Türkiye’den birilerinin izlediğini görmek çok güzel
This video taught me so much about myself and also about guys. Thank you! ❤
Good food for thought here thank you. I realised that when I take the lust away from my ex relationship there was very little of substance left hence one of the reasons she’s now my ex !!!
Powerful video. I learnt this recently after my last relationship. Trust your gut and never settle….
Yeh true. So much things related in this vid that even myself cant tell the right words/answer to my friends why i chose to brokeup with her, even she is so cute, clingy, and made me feel loved again.
I know my decision is true. And jn from hearing hamza's words.. i know im in the right path.. Alhamdulillah.
@@msc1132you did what felt good to you. That’s a win brotha 💯
you made this video at the perfect time for me so everything happens for a reason
For me too,
Can you please tell why you said so?
Same
Same here❤
just broke up with my girlfriend a few days ago after 10 months... this explains it perfectly, however sex was not apart of the question as we were both waiting till marriage. Once that honeymoon phase ended we were able to pick out incompatibility. We wanted different things, and different archetype of person. She was amazing and of course ill miss her but i know the future is bright for both of us.
they don’t want you to read the book Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki because it sets you free
I’m a female and have only been with my two ex husbands. My value is i dont sleep with men outside of marriage. BUT it’s made this “dating” process that much harder for me, men seem to only have sex on their mind, or atleast expect “sexy talk”. I lose all interest and respect for them instantly and cut them off. Or am i being too judgy? Can good men with good intentions also have that mindset of checking how sexual we women are before committing?
When you have everything you ever wanted in life and youre still miserable, youre legit cooked. Literally your dopamine receptors have maxxed out. Thats why i refrain from most pleasure as possible. When you live stoically the simple mundane things bring so much bliss it doesnt even make sense
Lesson No.6 23:52 by Hamza Ahmeded
Best video you made!
this one hits close to home - great vid bro
Thank you, Hamza
I wonder if the type of guys who watch Hamza will stop watching him when he gets married and has a family...
Love you bro
It’s crazy because when he made that video I knew he was lying. I could tell he was just tired of her. He wanted to smash other chicks but didn’t know how to tell her and didn’t want to be judged by these lil 16 year old dudes who haven’t experienced real life.
Thank you for this video
The same way easy access to prn is so damaging, the same can be said for easy access to women. Except it can be worse because there's another person involved and they're getting damaged too
At the end of the day, Hamza, you make videos on the experiences you’ve had and the lessons you’ve learnt in life. As humans, we never stop gaining experiences and learning new things. Our opinions change based on new information that we learn, so you “changing your opinion on certain things” all the time is just a natural human tendency. We make mistakes, and that’s what half of the stories you tell us are about - mistakes that you e made in the past. Just because the story is from more recent times, people think they can get angry about it, not sure why, because there’s still a lesson in there, which is why we all subscribe to you - for the lessons you’ve learnt and are teaching us. If anything, the fact that you’re actually addressing it all and still being open enough to share these contradicting opinions and new experiences you’ve gained knowledge from, is very respectable, as you know the backlash you’ll get for it, yet you still do it. You do the difficult task, even when you know the hard consequences. Respect. Keep it going bro, looking forward to seeing where the future takes you. 👊💪🤝
27:09 bro hamza you good?
I won’t lie, the emount of women who have never had a hookup that aren’t judging their potential partner for tons of hookups may be 0 on earth. By nature people who have never done a thing, typically don’t do the thing because they despise or see it as beneath them. And they extend their personal standards upon other people, as we typically do when we resist something based on principle. We’d expect it of others we trust. Honestly if a woman has never hooked up and is ok with what you do, I’d be seriously concerned something may be actually wrong with her in some other way. So yes, it is a double standard
Hamza, God is calling you 🙏
As a Russian Christian I'm happy to see Hamza starting to understand some truth. Finally he seems to be more mature and started to talk about really important things. I have been watching Hamza infrequently for 1-2 years with understanding that he's not telling the right things. Hook up's have bad consequences and nobody talks about that (even in Russia). Only in 35-50 years of age when your wife devorces you and takes all the kids when your whole life is ruined you take the punishment of your younger choices. I have seen hundreds of such stories. I hope Hamza will realize all the important things before such a story will happen to him (the bad consequences of hook up are a very small part of all the things you need to know before marriage).
Полностью согласен
He's a fraud as a Christian you shouldn't watch people like him
How does you sleeping around as a 20 year old cause your wife to divorce you 15 years later. That doesn't make sense. Wouldn't she have not married u in the first place if u sleeping around in your youth was such a problem
@@moejohnson2132 There are 3 big bad consequences of having hook up.
First consequence. Have you ever noticed that you can't enjoy things for a long time? You bye a phone or a car, you can really enjoy it, you take care of it, you love it. But after few years you get used to that thing and it can't bring you joy. First holding hands, first kiss, first sex. All that is awesome. But after few years you still get used to that and it can't bring you that much joy that was bringing to you in the past. There are two ways to maintain the level of joy in your life.
First way is the path of pleasure. You just bye a better phone/car when your current one doesn't bring you joy. Couples start to bye things in sex shop, start to experiment with anal, role games, bdsm. They do it just to diversify their sex life. But they'll get used to that also, so they experiment further. One day a man can realize that prostate is a cool thing and maybe it will very good if his wife would fuck him with strapon 🤠. He can also realize that idea of cheating starts to turn him on very much. At that point he can either cheat himself or watch his wife fuck another dude. But all this perverted things started from innocent vibrator and anal experiments. Don't you think some people are born being perverted? No. They become perverted on their pleasure path. The main problem of this path is that it's endless. You will always need to do crazier and crazier things, eat more delicious food, buy better car or you will not be happy. On this path you will get short-term pleasure but it's nothing compared to long-term unhappiness that you'll get. If you dream about money you are on this path. If you dream about sex, trips, girls, popularity you are on this path. If you dream about attention, beauty, brand clothes, newest iPhone, better car you are on this path. If you had hook up's, if you start relationships with a girl without intention to build a family with her in the future you are on the path of pleasure. If you choose a girl only based on how you feel with her you are on this path. If you can say things like "I can't live without her" you are on this path (this words has nothing to do with true love). Sometimes it's enough to hear a person's meaning of life and goal in life to understand person's path.
The alternative to this path is abstaining. That is the only effective and healthy way to maintain happiness and joy in your life. You see, only when you're hungry you truly enjoy food. Only when you haven't listened the music for a long time you can hear the actual beauty of all sounds. Every time when you have a hook up you trade off your ability to love and enjoy your future wife to just have a bit of short pleasure. Also every hook up pushes you further into path of pleasure, It'll be very hard for you to get off of this, it's an addiction.
@@moejohnson2132 Second consequence. Why do you think you will not cheat on your future wife? You can say "Why would I cheat when I have a wife that I love? I just don't need to. I'm a kind person. I'm not the one who can cheat". And that is the most naive thing I heard in my life. It's like saying "Why would I have the urge to drink cola, eat fast-food, smoke, masturbate when I can have a diet, be healthy, train every day, go to bed early". As I said previously you can have the most pleasure in the start of relationship, but later you will get used to this. You will have to fight the urge to look at other girls. Even Jesus Christ had to fight Satan's temptations. We all have and will have the urge to sin. In my life it's easy to get a girl. It's hard to resist lust when you have all the opportunities, when you can just text 2-3 girls and have sex with one of them that same day. One day I had very hard temptation. I even lost the fight and agreed to come to her place. But on the next day (day of meeting) I canceled the meeting. I felt so happy because I realized very important thing. There was nothing that stoped me from getting laid. I had no relationships, I didn't have to pay anything, It was just free and pure pleasure. And if I resisted it this means that when I will have a wife, children, family (i.e. things that stop you from sin), I will definitely not cheat. "I know how bad of a person I am and THAT'S why I will not cheat" - that is the right answer. When you don't have experience in resisting lust, I don't think you can be a good person. There is a high chance that you will cheat.
Third consequence. When you are not on the right path, when you don't resist temptations, when you choose woman based only on your feelings and not on important principals, you just physically or metaphysically can't have a good wife in your life. Why? Because you can't smell the dirt in human when you have such in yourself. There is a law in relationships. It says "Like attracts like". Your future girl will be as much sinful and lustful as you are. So there will be no surprise when such a girl will cheat while being a wife and having a children.
There are more bad consequences, but I told about the main 3 that I know.
Blud really said "so, I moved to a sh!thole and life sucked there"
I think waiting for months until u are sure Ur attracted to this person, doesn't mean you overcame lust. I think the problem here is relationships out of marriage. both partners will slowly lose interest and motivation. sometimes it's not a correct gut feeling telling you this person is bad and not meeting Ur values. sometimes your just over it, because nothing is motivating you to be better together. so my advise be fully in and do it right or just don't!
Sex before marriage is sin and so is Lust. Sexual immorality is a sin that can lead you to Hell (All sin can lead you to Hell).
I respect the transparency here Hamza.
I understand bro, I wish you the best!
Thank you for this
The most valuable video I've seen in 2 years since I follow you
What Hamza mentioned at 19:57 about a girl with past hookups, I feel the same way, however
if I'm in an amazing relationship with a girl who has had hookups (even if just in the form of failed relationship attempts), should I cut things off for that one issue? I guess only my gut feeling can answer that. Also, most girls now have had hookups, (even relationship-oriented women with good values), so what is one to do, be single forever?
Great video Hamza, you have earned many people’s respect back with this video
sure
Trust ur intuition
Like why the pics
Your Voice and the direct speach to us, is what makes your Videos different. Thx for your Videos 🙏❤️
Love you bro
You should make a video about what you have to contribute to a girl other than muscles and money. These are shallow attributes that don’t attract traditional virgins like me
keep it up hammie
Now your back to giving good advice. Continue this Hamza!
Really, really good video. This is genuinely a gem.
I disagree that there's no point to figuring out your values more intentionally though - because your gut feeling is strongly influenced / disrupted by the society you grew up in, and some of the values perpetuated by that society can be very bad. So really figuring out what's you and what is outside influence in a calm, secluded context is important for a lot of folks. Especially young men who grew up with the influences of woke culture, if they want to be able to trust their gut feeling or rather be able to tell it apart from the brainwashing. It's really just reflection, like on anything else.
MashaAllah
good point, also gut feeling could be "biased" when there is unresolved trauma
@ Very true.
One of the best videos ever. 100% truth
26:24 don't u worry broo, we're only human after all... I'd very much appreciate what you've doing here, and that's what matters 👍🔥💯
I really like your few last video's style and your new vlog channel, thank you Hamza!
Glad more n more men are speaking .. light enters self awakened, it enable people come together only with true love. Energy refills once the draining effect leaves.
Why do you have this piano music going on in the background? Come on. You know we don't need music to listen to what you're saying bro.
Good talk bro, nice to see such a deep dive into someone else's insight into relationships. I just want to highlight that it is important to talk to the person you are interested in and see if they are aware of their own shortcomings and are willing to work and overcome them. People change and grow when willing and motivated. Up to you to gauge and recognize where that person's mindset is and so it is essential to talk about the things Hamza pointed out. Relationships can be difficult because there can be friction when you tell each other about your own shortcomings but if you are willing to grow together be honest with yourself and each other and stick through the difficulty of being criticized and understand someone else's point of view I think that's the pinnacle of a great relationship and love.
And as Hamza said if your goals/values and path don't align you need to be able to recognize that and be able to move on even though it can be hard especially if you have become close. Which is why I understand that being aware and not letting lust control your decisions is very important.
Sometimes there can be reasons too as to why someone thinks the way they do if you love them and want to see them grow you may need to hold their hand and help get them through certain mental barriers. But you can only really do this if the other person is open and willing to change and trusts you and as said before has the same values and ambitions. You can't forcibly change people they'll always inherently move towards what their personal values are and what they gravitate towards.
Can’t take him fr anymore. I try but I seriously can’t. The inconsistency and half regrets of degeneracy isn’t inspiring
And the moment he seems like he's starting to show some humility he just goes "oh no no I'm successful btw totally not a loser" which makes me feel like he's quite insecure beneath the surface
are you a retard?
@@omererenylmaz413we’re human, not everyone can be a chosen flawless leader.
@@omererenylmaz413u think? He threw in 30 different pics of him and random girls just to show off lol they added 0 value
Yep and is it really masculine to reveal intimate details like that about your ex how would she feel
man i can really relate to you. am stuck in kinda the same situation rn. feelin confused af
Why does it take men so long to figure this out? Also, that is how relationships are. The lust and infatuation stage always fades after some time. That’s why your relationship has to be built on a solid foundation from the very beginning. If you always leave after the lust and infatuation stage ends you’ll never be in a long-term, solid relationship. So you still need to mature more and develop your relationship skills.
After listening to this whole video, you are too immature to be passing out relationship advice. This “advice” is detrimental to young men.
Brother just a thought. I have been with my wife for 9 years and we have 4 children together. I noticed you said values don’t change but from my experience they do. It’s a part of growing together rather than as an individual. Also from my experience. It does help to logically analyze and write down your values the same as it would for anything probably. Also the same for emotions. If you lead with them, you may be convinced by your own insecurities or bias rather than being objective about your opinion. Anyway, I thoroughly enjoy your videos thank you so much for sharing your experience proud of you!
Love this perspective and advice!
You want to marry a girl who hasn’t had any hookups. I respect that decision so immensely but I got one question. How do you ensure that this is really the case? As you said, the possibility she won’t be honest about it is there. Especially when she finds out your view on that. That’s also the reason why women lie about their real body count.
I personally have had similar thoughts my whole life, even how can I really love a girl who already has been intimate with other dudes, not only in that hookup way but even has had relationships. I think if being honest, it fuggs with every dude’s mind, not only the stereotypical “incel’s” one, when he thinks about it that other dudes have had his future wife who he is supposed to love and to care about. Somehow this is the curse of the modern time and as you say, when you grow older you see that the religious view on sexuality actually makes much sense.
But I don’t mean to spam too much, I just find it interesting to hear your opinion how to make sure a girl is honest about what she says in terms of her past
5 months ago I was in my worst possible state glad I found you,thx man I’m really grateful
Your age?
@ huh?
@@ayla7375 age?
Ah ur pretty much insulting her