The Cool Girl Trope, Explained
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- Опубликовано: 11 дек 2019
- Sign up for Skillshare: skl.sh/thetake67 | She's not like other girls. She's a COOL girl. But does this fun, junk food-loving hottie actually exist? And what's behind this myth? In this video, we take on how the Cool Girl has evolved onscreen and what she represents in our culture.
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Hey The Take - Could you do a video on gay male and female stereotypes in movies and how harmful they can be?
Subtitles please
I usually like your videos but I'm not sure if I get the message that this one is sending. That pretty women can't enjoy traditionally masculine things, and if they do they're just trying to impress men? You say that the cool girl trope is a fantasy, which I agree with to an extent. The exaggerated, perfect, version that's depicted in movies is definitely geared towards male viewers, and probably isn't an attainable role model for most women.
The problem for me is when you cite real women in the real world as being "fake" just because they fit aspects of this trope. You show a girl calling Halo her favorite video game and use that an example of women "lying to themselves" and trying to be someone they're not. So....any women who claims to like video games is lying? Then you say Jennifer Lawrence is just putting on a persona because she likes to talk about eating. So any woman who talks about food is being fake and just projecting that to impress men? I don't get it.
What should be done to handle the issue in the real world?
The trope/archetype is a creation; a reaction to - and apparently welcome relief from - the strange difficulty of adapting to the complexities of reality.
I am a woman who stays in shape and loves sports and also pizza and craft beer. I am a Herpetologist in an extremely male- dominated science field who also likes looking feminine and wearing makeup. I'm also 31 and bisexual and certainly not "going through a phase" or "doing these things for men". I find it ironic that some of the statements made in this video are almost exactly the same as criticisms I've received from Male coworkers and other women simply for being myself. I usually love your analysis and I really love that Gone Girl monologue but this video feels not only disingenuous but rather judgmental.
“Watching Adam Sandler movies”
Her biggest sacrifice
Melanie Warner she’s braver than the US marines
I suddenly have a new found respect for Amy, especially if she had to sit through " Going Overboard" "Grown Ups 1 and 2" and "Jack and Jill"!😆
@@trinaq yeah, his later work is cash-grabbing 🗑🗑🗑, but his earlier work is decent enough
Melanie Warner he deserved everything he got for that alone
@@transmatized but no one made her sit and watch them. She CHOSE to do that to get with the man she CHOSE.
cool girl are basically literally just considered pretty tomboys
Edit: thanks for the likes
A vip army-L that blinked once who’s ikonik and they’re similarly misogynistic concepts too.
Who actually exist, though...
tomboys with nice long hair and a bit of makeup
A vip army-L that blinked once who’s ikonik that’s not true at all. “tom boys” are masculine presenting and masculinity in women is almost never celebrated. “cool girls” are hyper feminine but enjoy things that are socially considered masculine or something that men usually enjoy
@@transmatized they're not "hyperfeminine" because that's too time-consuming, but effortlessly feminine
Tbh Elle Woods in Legally Blonde is one of my fave characters bc she remains true to herself in her femininity but she learns to stand up for herself and finds her own ambition and doesn’t depend on a man for her happiness.
This! I had to force my boyfriend to watch legally blonde and he was actually surprised how refreshing it was. Elle is ofc still gorgeous but she learns that she doesnt have to change herself for anybody, that she can rely on her own smarts to get by in life and that being girly and liking pink is okay.
I'm gonna rewatch all the 90s chick flicks and rom coms
@@danashine1137 gimme a list pls, i need new ones
@@lo.fr.8092 yes please!
This
In the comments many wrote that the cool girl fantasy might be an outcome of men suppressing their homosexual tendencies. But I have a different approach. I think they want to get a girl without improving themselves, learn about new topics, get out of their comfort zone and develop an equal perspective to humankind.
Wish I could give this a 1000 likes. Exactly
Makes SO much sense to me! Wow...
Yes, also they want all the benefits (girl with a hot body and a beautiful face, and someone to share *their* own interests with) without spending any efforts / doing any work (aka, no "demanding/needy" girlfriend). She has to offer him everything (sexual pleasure and bro-y, casual fun, and ask for nothing in return (e.g, no need for emotional support).
I agree. I don't think it's a latent homosexual desire (at least not always), but it's feeling like their partner should be accommodating to their every need and desire, rather than be a real person with their own interests, hangups and inner life. If they actually tried dating another man I don't think that would help; most other men would NOT conform that way to a partner's expectations of what they should be like.
@@katelijnesommen its a sexual fantasy, nothing else. Like many other male sexual fantasies, the core idea is simply that the women belongs to them and fulfills their every need without any want or desire of her own.
It is objectification and also enhances sexism against women in many ways. I grew up wanting to be the "cool girl" because everyone around me bashed on traditionell feminine traits and let me tell you: It is just as harmful as all the other forms of oppressive sexism against women. I would even call it one of the most dangerous because the core idea of the "cool girl" is to be liked by men and appeal to them which was also my first priority as a young girl and teenager, so you do things you dont want to just to please them and form your whole personality and needs around that.
I am so thankful that this topic is now getting more attention (even tho I would personally say that the "pick me"- and "not like other girls"-movement is rather harmful than good since it places the blame on the women) and hope that in the future, we can just be whoever we want to be and teach healthier ways of attraction, relationshipdynamics and so much more.
“I’m not like other girls. I like chicken nuggets and play video games”
I believe you!
Elusive Truth “girls are drama! Thats why I only have guy friends” 🙄
“Look at those sluts, with different interests!” They obviously must be inferior because of that
Haha because it's so unnatural for anyone to enjoy chicken nuggets.
Also I feel like a lot of girls would enjoy video games if they just tried them. I enjoy them, and it's not sexy when I should be productive but I'm hung up on gaming because I suck at prioritising things.
No one thinks it's sexy to have bad grades because you had discovered a new passion for an old assassins creed game...
Cornelia Hanimann who doesn’t like chicken nuggets?
I told my guy friends that telling a girl she’s “different than other girls” is not a compliment and they literally could not comprehend why.
yikes!
Yeah this guy told me he’s not usually into black girls but there’s something about me & I didn’t take that as a compliment.
Divinity Worsham omg🤭
@@divinityworsham3925 oh my..
Thing with a lot of guys is they're often not great at abstract thought and reading between the lines. Don't feel bad about dumbing it down and spelling it out to them. They're not being wilfull hardasses, they genuinely don't get it.
It's so funny when they say shit like "I cannot believe you read comic books" Yeah, it's almost as if girls are human beings with interests.
Yes, I absolutely hate that stereotype. I'm a woman who loves scifi and superheroes and math. One of the many reasons I stopped watching Big Bang Theory was that idea that women didn't know the difference between Start Trek & Star Wars. Ugh.
Also maybe many girls weren't interested in comic books because the only interesting characters were male characters, while female characters were just there as damsels in distress or sexy villains, making it hard for young women to relate to them.
I know what you mean, but I hate when people use "It's so funny" in this way. I think it's just plain old sad.
there was a boy who was surprised because I read the lord of the rings. it's like reading the lord of the rings is a sacred thing for men.
Wendy from Gravity Falls is a cool girl that appeals to women and girls, in my opinion. She's empowering, confident, and is not afraid to stand up for herself, especially to guys when they've done something wrong.
Omg so true
Wendy's good but one thing I never liked about her character is that she never got an episode to be fleshed out like soos pacifica and even mcgucket got their own episodes to be complex characters and Wendy only ever mentions not really being laid back due to her family and the show just leaves it at that. There also was space to make an episode about her since after the unicorn episode the finale was supposed to be next but the show had an extra episode to fill in and instead of Wendy they filled it with the worst episode of gravity falls
She's not a a cool girl, she's that girl. Chill, badass, and unproblematic.
I don't like women but Wendy is so fcking hot
And she doesn't shame other girls
I'm a cool mom. I go on alcohol benders and forget to feed my kids.
" Hey Babies! Wanna drink some beers?"
"I'm not like a regular mom. I'm a cool mom!"
-mean girls, 2004
Shane Grele You found me out.
Is butter a carb?
Mackenzie Fleetwood Sounds like my mom, she’s cool haha
“I’m not like other girls.”
Me: *Wow that sucks, girls are so awesome.*
Updated cool girl ☝🏼
Ikr
I needed this comment 💖
I've always hated the 'I'm not like other girls" comment, as if we're all the same. Girls are unique and awesome.
@jay I'm sorry you never had a genuine relationship in your life. Maybe if you socialise more often?
internalized misogyny is very true. i remember a few years back when i directly associated "feminine" to "bitchy", and disliked very feminine girls for that reason, and participated in slutshaming. We get taught so many misognist ways of thinking as we grow up. We all wake up at different times. And some never wake up
Look at you being so honest and self-reflective. Brave! I used to think similar things too and it makes me cringe so hard when I look back on that. I’m so happy to have a better relationship/view of women now that I’ve grown and realized that we as a society are conditioned to hate women
@@Olivertwiztd thank you, and well said ✊🏼
I am just now realizing I've internalized this cool girl persona as the perfect version of myself and I'm a bit stunned haha. I've always been so scared to complain or be whiny or needy or in general too feminine but I do want to be the hottest version of myself. I've got some reevalutating to do, holy shit.
@@CharmedNijntje good for you for noticing! honestly, i think most girls had a 'cool girl phase' because that's how we're taught in society, a lot of internalized misogyny is present and passed on
@@harleyquiinnnn Yes very true! I'm 30 though haha, but it's a good lesson that we're never too old to learn new things and grow. :)
Interesting, that the "cool girl" became the "I'm not like other girls" then became the "pick-me girl". I still have a problem feeling overly feminine or girly. I still want, above all, to play videogames and watch dark movies and hang out with guys. But I don't look like what they expect me to look like. I ain't no Jennifer Laerence or Megan Fox lol
Feel you sis
The thing is the cool girl trope was always the pick me girl. The 3 stages basically illustrate the increasing realization what this trope actually mean. The way I see it is that more and more women have become increasingly aware of what internalized misogyny is and how it affects their relationship with their own femininity.
@@yan7655 I think it could be that too, however some girls are just naturally more boy-ish and they dare to be themselves. Then they get positive attention from boys for being "not like other girls", so the typical "girly" girls gets jealous and start calling them pick-me. I grew up with brothers and didn't fit in with most girls in my class as a kid, but that didn't make me feel better or superior. I just played sports or video games with people (mostly boys) who didn't argue over dum sh*t, who didn't talk behind my back or get offended by my jokes.
I fit into this "cool girl" trope, but I still embrace my feminin side, and at the end of the day I need my girlfriends more than anyone 💁🏼♀️
@Ks you completely missed my point
@@slychicken661 I resonate with what you’re saying. I grew up with brothers too(I have no sister) and I think I just picked up on boyish habits and likes. Even in college now, I wanna play sports while the other girls don’t. They aren’t into that stuff and aren’t excited about it. I literally have to convince them to play video games and sports with me. While I love wearing jeans and T-shirts, junk food and super cars I also love wearing dresses and girl talk. But my confidence and friendly enthusiasm in talking with guys is perceived as pick me energy. While my intentions are just chill and a laidback attitude
Part of the problem is also the, "I prefer a woman who can eat a whole burger for breakfast" and, "I hate it when girls wear makeup" type guys who treat women who are more feminine as somehow inferior.
Underneath that is a belief that the more feminine woman will be more high maintenance and therefore expensive.
I think that's just preference... feminine girls are doing just fine too. It's usually comedies that fully embrace the "cool girl" thing, but those are the same comedies where the dudes are the typical stereotype of watch sports, drink beer and have no other redeeming qualities that I personally can't stand.
@@MarkKoschwitz
Yeah but the problem is that they'd still expect her to be pretty and slim with good skin while eating junk food and not putting any effort in. That's not possible for the vast majority of women so it sets this unreachable bar. Women are told growing up to put so much effort into their looks to impress men but then men have made effort itself unattractive and they call it "high maintenance". It's all a big headache.
If this is actually believed then idk who the couples are I go to happy hours with and shovel nachos into my belly with...
These movies are definitely an exaggeration though and they really should be viewed as such. They're not "regular" people at all. I don't think any of the couples I know fit into these movie stereotypes... but I still shovel nachos into my mouth with them during happy hours.
@@MarkKoschwitz
Of course there are exceptions and people who are realistic about their expectations. But there are also lots of people who act the way I described.
"I never wore pink" that horrid line sums it up
One thing I've noticed is that teen and pre-teen (11-13) girls often go through a hating pink phase. I think it's because of this trope. They want to be the "cool girl" and hating on stereotypically feminine things like the color pink, Barbie, bubblegum pop music, etc. is part of their desperation to be seen as cool girls. They don't really hate pink, they hate the cultural stereotypes surrounding wearing it.
@@naomistarlight6178
Exactly!
@@naomistarlight6178 I totally went through this phase. Pink has always been my favorite color but in high school I pretended it wasn't. I've always been a nerd and that made it even worse. I thought caring about my looks too much might make me seem dumb or "not a real nerd." You can love pink and be smart!
Noemi Starlight the problem is, the person delivering this line was a proper adult. Not a teen.
@@melissafaith a bigger problem is that another full grown adult wrote that line and thought it was clever or at least good enough to be put in an actual movie
i like how in HIMYM, robin’s identity as the not-clingy “cool girl” is eventually what turns guys off in most of her relationships. it shows how men might like a girl who’s cool and independent and has more masculine interests, as long as he can have the more dominant role in the relationship. even if HIMYM starts out with robin as a smooth, dream-like cool girl, we really see her dorky, emotional and more flawed sides in later seasons and that’s rly good of the writers (ofc they ruined it in the finale....)
wholeheartedly agree with this
I was the ‘cool girl’ in my 20’s. It was all a lie; I AM inherently a tomboy and have a lot of what’s generally considered ‘masculine’ interests. But I acted like I didn’t want a relationship or anything serious because I wanted to be the ‘catch’, I also hid a lot of my own ‘nerdy’ interests to not come across as weird. All this while simultaneously wanting to guard myself when these men ultimately decided we were ‘better off friends’. “Yeah, no, no, that’s cool, I was actually thinking the same thing, you know…”
As far as me not wanting anything long-term, nothing was further from the truth. I wanted love, but groveled to make myself more appealing. And do you know who you end up with when you lower yourself or do the whole ‘pick me!’ schtick to find companionship? Assholes and narcissists. Not the ‘we didn’t work out so he’s terrible’ labeled narcissists. Genuine narcissists that expect you to shrink as they grow and for you to reflect their likeness.
Luckily, I met my husband and he saw me for who I really am. He helped tear down those walls I’d built up and allows me complete emotional access when I’m feeling vulnerable, instead of me having to bottle it up and openly mock myself for *feeling*. He WANTS me to talk about MY interests, teach him different things, and I reciprocate that. That is what I was looking for while reducing myself needlessly for idiots.
Ladies, REAL men are out there, not just dude bros that essentially want one of their homies in a woman’s body so they don’t have to put in any romantic work. Honestly be your true self; you don’t want a half-vested partner that thinks your inability to consume cold pizza and game 6 hours a day, is a flaw. Because you know what? Fuck them; I AM cool. And yes, I do like football, but I don’t feel the need to wear a football jersey five days a week to prove it now.
This is so beautiful and well-put! Thank you for sharing!
Great comment, thanks for sharing : )
I'm so glad things worked out for you!
This a refreshing comment. I truly love this.
👏👏👏👏 amazing Thank you for sharing
“Just because some cute girl likes all the same bizarro crap you do... that doesn't make her your soulmate." - One of the best lines from 500 Days of Summer
Totally!!! Thanks for this quote, I was thinking the same thing
Also! When I dated someone with a majority of similar interests, it was, in fact, the worst relationship I've ever been in because I based my forming a relationship on those things and not what actually matters: caring no matter what about someone else.
Yeah that happened to me. I was dumb
@@radpunk5144 I'm glad it opened your mind.
Omg yes!! 500 days of summer is yet another movie that breaks this toxic cycle and shows us a more whole, authentic picture.
Im not like other girls... I’m Joseph Stalin.
Oh noo...
🤣🤣🤣
🤣👍
The perfect girl doesn't exi-
that's better
I just love the poetic justice. Amy was sick of pretending to be the cool girl that Nick liked. Besides, he cheated on her anyway. So, in the end she forces him to be the guy that she wants.
and he assaulted her multiple times lmao
men: 'she's so hot she is just like a guy'
me: just date a guy you coward
I think it's more like "wow we have a lot and in common and she's so hot"
Yeah, guys like hot girls who they have a lot in common with. They must be gay lol
@@ChrisR395 wait how is that gay?
@Angel Rose I don't find men attractive lol,
@@leonthethird7494 My comment was clearly directed at the OP
“I want you to be a size 0 but also eat pizza everyday, never go to the gym and don’t care about your health at all”. Sure, fam.
Autom4tic LMFAOOO
Ok but that’s literally me. Except replace pizza with takis
Galaxy Charm k
I think people have a problem with this idea because they fail to realize that some girls can actually be that way. I am a size 0 , I eat a lot of food and never exercise yet I don’t gain weight because I just have a naturally fast metabolism. It almost makes me feel as if I’ve done something wrong...
Edit - I can’t help that my metabolism is fast. People actually used to think I was anorexic when I was younger.
Autom4tic It’s totally possible until you turn 40 or have a kid. Then those unhealthy eating habits and not working out catches up with you. Even supermodels admit to this.
"The man's ideal girl is a girl that doesn't make him try hard" WOOF truer words have never been spoken
Yes, but not for the reason I feel some girls think. If a girl is "playing hard to get", or in other words, "making me try hard to gain her affections", often forces me to assume she's simply not interested in me, and then I disengage.
So you're right, or I guess the video is right? I just wanted to make sure the reasoning behind this was apparent - at least in my experience.
@@mcdonaldsguy8420 I guess it depends on your individual definition of what trying hard looks like. it may be different from you and her. if neither tries enough to get together, either she isn't interested or her definition of trying enough is different from hers-and you're not meant to be. then she will find someone suited to her. some girls think they need to play hard to get because they perceive men dont like clingy girls.
You lose 'em how you get 'em: easily. Many men will try harder at a video game than to get a girl. Let that sink in. What's more important? Stay single until you find a man who sees your worth more than a video game. A guy getting a girl easy will never respect the relationship subconsciously in the long run. And if a guy complains about having to chase, well is that a guy who you want anyway? A man who's lost his zest for life?
J X amen, find good partners that put in effort 😇
Rehaan Aamir plenty of women ask men out nowadays. It’s just that no woman has ever asked you out and I can see why.
I’ve always wondered about how I don’t act “feminine “ but never fit in in those cool girl tropes. Im neither of them and It should be normal because we’re individuals who doesn’t have to completely fit in the stereotypes men made
In my personal opinion, a cool girl isn't what Hollywood plays her out to be. She's a girl who doesn't worry about what other people, including boys, think of her, says & does what she enjoys she likes without a care. That's what a cool girl should be depicted as.
This!
men be like wow i've never met a girl who listens to music before
SERIOUSLY THO
or watches sports
Never met a man who listens period. (joke of course) 🤣🤣🤣
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
lmaoo
"SHES ONLY COOL SO LONG AS SHES COMFORTING NOT CHALLENGING TO MEN"
It explains why men love seeking out the hot, exciting, dangerous "other woman" but ditch her as soon as she starts getting too demanding. Just see what happened to Anne Boleyn. King Henry adored her as the sexy mistress but had her beheaded as soon as she became queen and had almost as much power as him.
That one hit like a truck
did this make u question everything like am i the cool girl, do i even like the interests i like or is it cause of wat i ve watched online or through media influencing my choices sub-consciously
@Carnivorus that's because they excel at it
@@hollywoodshopaholic damn. you should make those kind of videos with the truths you are pulling out!
cool girl is only cool until she’s better or smarter than him, in front of others 😂
I think the anime Nana does an excellent job of portraying the cool girl and girly girl trope. Our two main characters are representative of each trope respectively but the show doesn’t try to elevate one girl over another. Instead, the show portrays the dynamic between the two and we follow them as they grow into best friends and deal with relationships and challenges. They may look and act differently but they deal with the same problems.
I was actually thinking about NANA right now. That anime is such a good trainwreck, I still can't bring myself to watch the last few episodes.
How is Nana a cool girl? That’s what I hate about this stupid trope. Now every woman who likes more male oriented activities or is alternative is seen as the “cool girl”. Nana is just being herself. She loves punk rock and wants to be in a successful band. How is that being a cool girl? Because according to this video, a cool girl is someone who will fake liking something, in order to get a man to like her. That is most definitely not Nana. If anything, that’s Hachi, the girly girl.
Nana also, believe it or not, has feminine traits. She is more chaste than Hachi. Hachi opens her legs easily for any man she find attractive, in the anime she sleeps with at least four men. Nana is only involved with her boyfriend Ren. That’s the only man she sleeps with in the anime, that I know of. She’s also responsible, nurturing towards her friends, more reserved in a way, etc. all traits associated with femininity. Hachi on the other hand is self destructive, chases after men, is far more sexually active, and is generally speaking a train wreck. Being sexually active and doing the chasing are more masculine traits. And that’s not slut shaming, that’s the truth.
So before feeding into this “cool girl” crap, do some critical thinking. Realize that this monologue was said by a sociopathic character, who is an unreliable narrator, who is projecting exactly what she did in order to get a man. So now she believes other women do the same thing she does. The reality is many women love things that aren’t always girly, and that’s okay. And liking girly things is okay too.
Yes
@@unknownstranger6875I was with you until you said “Hachi opens her legs for any man she finds attractive.” Kind of a harsh and gross way to describe what she’s been through.
Cool Girl is the frat boy's version of the manic pixie dream girl
A little louder for the people in the back
Omg this is exactly what it is!!!
Yeah
It seems like she's the ideal girl for Basic Bros.
yesss
“I cant believe you read comic books, i mean youre a girl” yea I’m not like other girls, i can read. Most women are literally phisically unable to read comic books but not me!! Im such a cool girl
Haha I read your comment as soon as he said that😂
Funny enough there are a lot of fans of manga and anime, and a lot of females I’ve met love bleach and demon slayer. Which is the new series..
Funny enough they relate to a lot of the characters who feel hurt or some sort of emotional pain. If anything it’s the idea that animation or illustrative works don’t matter and are childish. That’s what turns off people is being told not to do something, instead of not caring and allowing people to just LIKE things. If we stop putting limitations on people, and not give a fuck what people like or not and stop bullying people, for what they find interesting.. maybe the world would be easier.
You don’t see me picking on people cause they like western comics over Japanese comics. Why? Cause it doesn’t matter. It’s all the same thing!!!
🤣🤣🤣🤣
oMg ThaT iS so SeXisT! GirLs Can rEaD! i ReAd mY US weekly eVeRy WeEk
The whole "not like other girls" rubbish is a tactic to pit women against each other.
When I was in my twenties I used to be a DJ at parties, and the guys that dated me really expected me to be that trope for some reason. but every time we had a minor disagreement they were shocked to find I was a person with expectations and opinions, not a moving sexual fantasy. I wish I had this video back then because it felt so alone and hard to put into words.
6:15 Actually I feel like Scarlett Johannson’s portrayal of Black Widow was somewhat of a subversion of the cool girl trope. Yes she’s considered beautiful by the male (and some female) characters and displays other “cool girl” tropes but despite that she manages to maintain completely platonic relations with her male coworkers. This is especially noted with Clint Barton whom is considered her best friend. In fact in Winter Soldier, Natasha is seen wearing a necklace in the shape of an arrow. This was noted by the directors to have been a gift given to here by Clint as a token of their friendship. And keep in mind that Clint is a MARRIED man with a wife who knows of their friendship and has allowed this woman to be an honorary aunt to her three children.
Now you might be wondering how this is a “subversion”. It’s a subversion because I find that saying woman can’t display (traditionally) masculine characteristics is in of itself unrealistic and would be very limiting in writing a character. Woman can know how to fight. Woman can drink beer. Woman AND men can have completely platonic relations with one another. It’s not like she hasn’t also shown (traditional) feminine traits as well. In Winter Soldier she’s constantly trying to play matchmaker for Steve and other women she tries to set him up with. In Age of Ultron her and Clint have a conversations regarding decorating in the Barton household, etc.
Her backstory and job are certainly fantastical, but as a woman, she’s not a “cool girl.”
Basically: Men want to date themselves
Or other men in general, but in the body of a woman
Shocking news: People attracted to other people with similar interests and temperaments
daily_dillusion I’d argue lots of RomCom movies romanticize the man’s ability to open up and be emotionally vulnerable, which is typically portrayed as or associated with being feminine.
I, as a bisexual, always laughed at my own taste on mens and women. I like "masculine" girls but also love "femenine" boys. I always thought it was kinda ironic, but being honest, I think it is like it with everyone.
@daily_dillusion that's silly, one could argue that "nice guys" are just the male equivalent of "cool girl", and is sure caused partly by the female need to be understood. At the end they are all fanfics of lonely self inserted writers.
"The cool girl doesn't get angry." SO true! And when a girl does get angry, she's labelled as "crazy." Not entitled to her emotions, as all humans should be, but "crazy."
Katherine Caspersz yep. There’s an extremely limited scope within which you can get angry and have people accept it. Otherwise you’re either a crazy person or you’re on your periods or you’re that ‘women are their own worst enemy’ character or you’re hormonal from your pregnancy or post pregnancy or...something.
you can get sad upset mad without being aggressively loud abusive hurtful and angry though...
Asmosis Jones thnx finally someone said it
don't get angry. use the tactics of your parents.
silence, disappointment and contempt in your eyes if he has done a really bad thing, if it's a minor thing just talk clear to him.
I think I’m dating one of the most simplistic men I’ve ever met- not in a bad way, just in a way where he’s like the typical male. Very easy to read. And whenever I get upset or speak out on things, he tells me that I’m crazy. I think it’s unfair to label me as being “crazy” just because I have a mind of my own.
I HAVE ALWAYS loved pink and have been ultra feminine, I STILL DO love pink and is still ultra feminine and WILL ALWAYS love pink and be ultra feminine💗✨🌸💅🛍🍒 so kudos to all my girls who have supposedly gone through this phase. I couldn't be the "cool girl/tomboy" even if my life depended on it or if I tried.
Like other girls and proud of it!
@@melodyclark1944 Damn right to both of your comments! Just like other girls and proud of it 💖
Self confidence is the best outfit. Own it. Rock it.
Ew
@@ham-sley1308 ok then???
Everyone just stop scrutinizing women for the way they act, talk, dress, look, and wear. This trope is worth analyzing when it's on screen, because it represents our own cultural standards and our perception of different people (and are often written by men). But real people like Jennifer Lawrence or Chrissy Teigen are not "tropes" or written characters to represent something; that's just their personalities.
that is also an extremely good point, this topic has many points looking at both sides and i genuinely cant assess which is right or wrong but it brings us back to the same problem that is true, men do control a lot of things even this, and coming from a guy, i do think this trope has some merit but not all of it is irl
cool girl monologue points out how you can spend your whole life being a man's ideal and he'll still cheat on you
You can permanantly be a mans ideal? Can you stay 22 forever?
Liz Neptune yes I agree
@@LizNeptunelol what i said was a joke, what you said is an insight into your crummy personality. You are not oppresed by men if you date losers you are the only one to blame.
@JG00 Oh okay, what I said was a joke too. ;)
You are not acting like yourself.... You already lost.... Wake up and stop pretending lmao stop blaming others while you clearly have your own flaws...
Personally, after spending my pre-teen and early teen years "not being like other girls" (being a nerd and being into martial arts) I understood that thinking those things made me better than other girls and to be so comfortable mocking traditionally feminine things, was deeply misogynistic, and so now in my young adult stage I embrace that being openly feminine and liking traditionally feminine things, doesnt make me less serious or less valid as a person, I embrace my tomboy-ish persona as much as I embrace my girly persona, and both make a duality that truly makes me happy, and I have found boys who hate that I'm feminine as much as I have found men who hate I act "like a man", and well, who cares when you are performing the real you?
I'm glad you've grown and become more comfortable with yourself since then. I've been there, too, so I get it. We just have to remember to be kind to those still stuck in that phase and not look down on them in the opposite direction
@@msjkramey yeah I know, everyone at some point wants to feel special and some young girls find this "I'm not like other girls" narrative appealing, and I truly hope that, as mentioned in the video, is a phase to find yourself rather than a personality to please men 😉
This is so true, when I was really young I liked more girly things, but I started becoming boyish when I was 8 or 9, maybe it's because I'm a daddy's girl and I saw him as an example(but it never felt like I was putting on a persona)
Anyway I too struggled to embrace myself completely for who I was and it feels great.
The trope is toxic maybe for making the boyish girl idealistic and bashing femininity, but that doesn't mean boyish girls are toxic...
Same. What I try to do now is support women who feel bad for not being "cool girl-like". I still don't like wearing dresses, or pink, or some traditionally super feminine stuff, but I like to encourage women who are very feminine and not only women who are more like me, because it's time we, including ourselves, stop seeing feminine as inferior. We are cool if we are feminine, we are cool if we are more masculine, we are cool if we are authentic.
Yup! True for everyone. The more we allow everyone to explore different parts of their personalities and interests, the more interesting they become and the more whole.
To be fair, Robin from HIMYM was raised that way. We see that she would have prefered being a normal girl than basically a boy. She moved with her mom and could finally express her feminine side. In the last season, Lily tried to organize a hen party for her, but she didn't have female friends. Because she _didn't know_ how to appeal to women
Every women is different so I don’t think there’s a way to appear to them
The first time I read the Cool girl monologue in Gone Girl it blew my mind , I had just gone through a break up and had No Idea what had happened and then so many things about how I acted based on what I thought he expected of me just clicked, that sh!t is harmful and I'm glad we're evolving past it
“Don’t be too fat, or too thin, or too dark, or too light. Don’t be too sexual, or too chaste, or too clever, or too stupid. Do all this while looking devastatingly beautiful, but don’t harbour any traditional feminine qualities. Be yourself, but make sure you fit in.” Gosh, it’s exhausting!
Wow, so true.
@@gracewheeler20 It's frustrating, isn't it? Always trying to live up to some unrealistic standards only to appease a certain section of society.
In the end of the day we settle down with the people who love the set of flaws we have
The first contact and the initial attraction will probably come after noticing the qualities
But in the end we come back and stay forever because we love how the flaws are shaped together
@Glenna Smith Centuries of conditioning has taught us that.
Feel sorry for you guys, it's a mans world out there.
Guys use to think I was "a cool girl" when I worked at a gun shop. I never had the heart to tell them that I'm not actually all that into guns and I like to wear dresses and do embroidery in my free time and also I'm a lesbian.
Tell them heh
J. L. Robertson wow that’s still cool.
Embroidery is lit ngl
J. L. Robertson
Lmaoo the last part
@@NinjaToe I strains the hell out of my neck, but I love it. I usually just work on it while I watch my "cool girl" wife play her video games. This is why I have a sneaking suspicion that the ideal "cool girl" is just a straight chick who acts like a lesbian.
Also, I went to film school. TRUST me when I say the men writing these movies truly have the gall to create these tropes. What was worse was seeing all of the insecure film nerds date the dancers at my school and treat them like garbage. And then go on to become these writers and directors in the film industry with an extremely warped perspective and continue to perpetuate the "Cool Girl" or "Manic Pixie Dream Girl" tropes
Whats with guys who barely put effort into themselves always being the most picky about girls
Also they don't want a "cool laid back girl who never gets angry" they don't wanna face the consequences of their actions
Cool girl trope - not available in plus size.
Megan in Bridesmaids is a natural cool girl but in a plus size as well.
No girl finds obese men sexy.
The plus size cool girl is actually the comic relief sidekick. That Australian actress is trying to change that, though. (Can't think of her name, sorry.)
Not even available in black
@Glenna Smith true it means bigger bone structure also known as buff
When you’re objectively attractive, being unkempt and messy gives you character and seems more like an aesthetic choice (baggy clothes, messy hair, etc.) When you’re not as attractive, those same qualities are regarded as laziness and failure to practice basic hygiene.
Gwencere - Why would anybody want to be skinny? Lean and fit, yes, but nearly skin and bones? No, thank you.
@@PlannedObsolescence Lean and fit IS skinny though. Skinny doesn't just mean skin and bones.
@@lottymix3233 lean and fit is lean and fit... Skinny is skinny, anything in between is thin
Gabby Falcón ... yes maybe it’s seen as a choice, or deliberately ironic... like the wealthy film star that dresses down - they can obviously afford not to so the cleverness is in making a statement. (I’m not endorsing that in any way) Winning the genetic lottery isn’t an achievement in itself but i think it’s hardwired in us to respond to health markers and pursue a winning formula.
True!! When I was thinner, everyone thought it was cute, hot, whatever. I went from 125 to maybe 145 pounds and now people (mostly women) are suddenly saying I'm just lazy etc...behind my back, of course 😂
It's so crazy how differently I am perceived with a little extra weight. Yet when I was thinner, all I heard (from mostly men) was 'damn you fine, if you get a little weight omg etc'. Also crazy how these women will jump on the first thing they can find to use against you. (The same girls who were either jealous or insecure, and felt the need to copy everything I did?? Sleep with both of my exes, get in debt to buy the same stuff i buy, etc. Thought these were strange as well considering they are 'friends'). Just some of my experiences, idk if anyone else has experienced any of this lol. What do I know though, I'm just spoiled, fat and lazy 😂
Lord women are vicious 😭
liking some of the things that “cool girls” like isn’t bad, it’s bad when you make your whole personality trait.
Yes
Hobbies/interests are not personality traits
The 'cool girl' is never known for her kindness, only chilledness
this video felt like therapy
EVERY girl goes through "I'm not like other girls" phase. Only later you understand that all girls (and people in general) are different in their own way. Good video.
Really? Every girl?
@@PlannedObsolescence nah, not every girl on the planet, not in a sense of a cool girl in a video. Of course everybody has "I'm not like the others" phase, but specific trope here is a product of a specific time and environment. As been said, it's a male fantasy about a perfect girl, and I might add it's a fantasy of a specific type of male, more-or-less modern western man. Outside of that population there are other types of men and some of them actually want a submissive girly girl - those tend to exist in places there you still can get one. And in response there exists a real-life type of er "uncool girl", "I'm not like other girls cause I wan to be a wife and a mother and wear only dresses and skirts" - I shit you not, they are serious on that skirt thing as a heart attack. Girls acting out tropes about "perfect women" because they value getting a man more than being themselves is not only limited to cool girls trope. Men also have their variants of acting tropes out, but it's mostly about peer pressure.
i think girls go through this is because of the negative connotations that comes from being the "other girl" we see in shitty movies in examples A to Z in the video we just watched. girls get that fear of not being seen, specifically when younger.
I'm glad I went through that phase in high school, before the age of social media (like, literally; I graduated high school in 2005). I think part of that in my case was growing up with all brothers. Then again, I came out as nonbinary in February this year...so there's that.
This video fails to make the point it thinks it does for quite a few reasons lmao. You feminists are hilarious You start out by complaining that society has often placed limitations on female behavior and expected them to act a certain "feminine" way but then complain that the feminist characters who break the buck and act different are merely just fantasies of men and don't exist in real life... so which is it?
I tried hard to be cool girl when I was a teen, I missed the “hot” part though so it didn’t work out 😂😂
Same, girl. Same.
Dont say that. You are beautiful sis
Mood lmao
I also tried hard to be cool girl as a teen, I missed the "girl" part though :D
At least you’re funny!
Okay I see what the problem is, but at the same time loving things typically “manly” or being a tomboy is not a bad thing since personalities, hobbies etc don’t have a gender. I’ve always been a bit tomboyish so I usually relate with these type of female characters. The problem ofc is the male gaze in general
I agree, the problem isn't "masculine" interests. It's how these female characters exist to be pleasingly supportive to the male leaving the female character to degrade "feminine" traits as inferior while never actually challenging anything in their world despite the author's insistence that the female is "rebellious" or "a feminist" regardless of the female character's actual lack of beliefs and actions.
The trope also presents an impossible standard of:
1. Never having "upsetting" or "challenging" emotions
2. Maintaing an hourglass figure despite their obscene love of food and lack of hygiene
3. Never dicussing topics that aren't sterotypically masculine in nature
4. Being content while your partner provides zero respect towards you
I will say this for Lily from Black Swan, she spends most of her screen time genuinely trying to befriend another woman who is too hard on herself, all the while giving Nina much needed advice for how to let herself be imperfect and not be under the boot of people like Leroy and her mother.
The least realistic thing about Mary is that she likes someone who chews with their mouth open
Fr that made me gag
I was like yeah bye
Right? That got me so bad I actually said "gross" out loud.
Seymour Disapproves I swear to god, like how??
I know right - I heard that part too and was like "uh - yeah that's 1000% just a male fantasy" - like plz find me one woman who is like "what I look for in a man is - chewing with their mouth open! Ugghhh so sexy!!" - whatttttt?!?!?!?
The whole “not like other girls” thing is stupid. There’s nothing wrong with women expressing femininity, likewise, there’s nothing wrong with women expressing masculinity. The same goes for men, they should be able to express masculinity and femininity however they want. We should all be able to be what ever we want to be regardless of the social norms that we never asked for.
yeah!!!!! 🌺🏵️🌻🌼🌸🌹
I like the phrase I am not like other girls I’m my own girl
Men expressing femininity is a really effective way to not attract or even lose women.
I agree with the advice that "you should be yourself" but when a guy expresses vulnerability to women it usually makes things worse.
I don't expect people to understand but that's just what i've experienced. There is a very good reason why men don't open up more, it's because women look to men for security, it would be like a pilot crying while flying, the passenger isn't concerned for the pilot's feelings, they are concerned for their own safety and will probably never fly with that pilot again.
I suppose both men and women are guilty of being inauthentic and we only have ourselves to blame.
Wordd!
@@jacobjohnson914 it's sad but true that that is often how it is (at least with my relationships), couples should be co-pilots
I know cool girls, and men do fawn over them but don’t actually value their humanity and eventually lose their patience with them when they realize they have real human female emotions.
This just made me realize something. I grew up as a tomboy (due to internalized misogyny) and I still am (I try to be more open-minded toward girly things though). Sometimes when guys find out I'm into manga and video games, they act like it's so unique (for girls...) and say they want to date someone like me and that's just a huge turn off to me. I always felt like they don't actually acknowledge who I am, they just project a fantasy onto me and expect me to perform. I love video games and manga but I hate talking to men about it because they will just annoy me.
Don't force yourself to like feminine things. Like what you want. Be a tomboy. Just respect feminine interests like fashion really. Internalized misogyny is hating other women or being a woman (yea im a girl i just like this character)
Lmao it's actually pretty common for me to find manga/anime loving girls around me 😂 like c'mon we can like manga and clothes at the same time
They’re gonna find it an ultra turn off when you tell them it’s romance, or something like Vampire Knight.
More evidence as to why Legaly Blonde is the best movie
Pippi Blue yes
true
it’ll never not be honestly
True dat (it is the greatest movie)!
Pippi Blue legally
“You are not like other girls” something my gyno told me when she saw in an ultrasound I’ve got an inverse uterus, only 20% of women have if like that, Christ.
The only "you are not like other girls" I would accept
hey, I have that too!
I love Jhopes Smile is that the same as a retroverted uterus?
@trash and co, it doesn't, the only thing was that it was a little bit harder to see my baby in the ultrasound the first 12 weeks (3 months), but, the week after, my uterus came to the front and my doctor and me were able to see the baby perfectly!
@trash and co thank you 🥰
Sometimes I think the problem is not media depictions, but the way we always establish everything we see on media as the ultimate "standard". Why can't we just separate the fictional things we see on media and things that we have in real life?
When I was in high school I was trying so hard to not be “like other girls”. It’s only a few years ago that I realised how misogynistic that was and that I was only doing it to please men. I’m happy I realised that and grew out of it. You’re going to get criticised if you try to be the cool girl and appeal to men, you’re going to get criticised if you detach yourself from that. So if you get criticism either way, why not do whatever the hell you want.
A cool girl should be:
Someone that is nice to people
That is all.
aww :) agreed
Kindness is punk rock.
That’s very vague.
@@AJ-cq5pw How?
Is this Betty?
It’s only cool that a girl like food when she’s extremely hot and thin.
Why would anybody want to be thin? Lean and fit, sure, but not thin.
Sad but true
Oh, that is not universally true at all. That's why this called these male fantasies - that's not real life. My body also doesn't look like those actors lol
@@PlannedObsolescence you are a guy, right. Because lean and fit in guys' language is thin in ours =))))) just like when guys said they prefer girls without makeup but she is actually wearing makeup.
@@PlannedObsolescence What people (men especially) call lean and fit is usually just a girl with an eating disorder who exercise until she doesn't get her period anymore. I have never in my life met a girl over 20 who is as thin as the ideal you describe without having a very problematic relationship with food.... while pretending that she eats pizza for breakfast.
While I wasn't aware of it at the time, I spent my entire teen years betraying myself in the hopes of being the "cool girl" to the point where I couldn't even decipher who I really was, or what I actually liked and wanted to be. It's devastating to look back on but I just hope that by shining light on the ridiculousness of this trope, other young girls/women wont fall into this unattainable trap.
Oh and the title character from Daphne Du Murier's Rebecca seems to me to be the earliest example of the 'Cool girl' (she is implied to have been 'not like other girls', having the 'spirit of a boy', doing what she wants, actually being quite masculine but in a beautiful feminine woman's body, and not caring about anything) but actually being evil and pretending implying again that the cool girl is all an act, and is put up against the second Mrs De Winter who is the ultimate uncool girl.
Another characteristic of the cool girl is that she is somehow only attracted to extremely mediocre men, i.e. the protagonists. Funny how that is.
Yes!! So true. lol How many movies out there has a hot cool girl falling for a shlep? So many.
AHA underrated comment
This is a summary of every Adam Sandler movie
WHOOP there it is
Right.
It’s just annoying that people don’t accept women as multifaceted beings. You always have to be in a box. You can drink beer and obsess about makeup at the same time. You can rock out to Mandy Moore and watch football at the same time. Women are just as complex as people expect men to be.
Aspyn J. Exactly.
yet the cool girl is literally a multifaceted being...you idiots are just complaining how else would they manage to be hot if they didnt focus on their looks ? Stop pretending that "people" you speak of exist cause they dont nobody labels females into categories females do it themselves if all you do is show one side of your personality that's your own fault
@@uno9331 Yeah, right, bc all the movies cited here that showcase the effortlessly hot and comfortable-to-be-around "cool girl" were made by women themselves. Facepalm. If you don't get it, just don't talk about it as if you did.
@Luna Lovegood Your nickname comes from the ultimate, true cool girl: Luna because she never cared what others think about her and was always herself even to a fault.
I agree mainly, however, I think the problem is not that girls can't be multifaceted. It's that the cool girl is never abrasive. She may be less prim then other female stereotypes but she never actively challenges the male protag. She is supportive even when he is doesn't deserve it. She won't focus on her own needs exclusively like a real person would. Hobbies, how she dresses, what she eats are window dressing. Cool girls are still classic heroines just gushed up with the things that are socially attractive to guys now. The best evidence? 500 days of summer. She is everything a cool girl should be but she doesn't want him or the separated fantasy of her, he has created. And against authorial intent many people hate her for it.
I really wish I would have watched this video as a kid. It would have saved me so much heartache
I don't understand how we know both Anne Hathaway and Jennifer Lawrence were performing a personality. How do we know they're both inauthentic?
it’s actually crazy how many girls have gone through the “tom-boy hating pink and all things girly” phase
That's on internalized misogyny 💅
So every girl naturally likes pink and if she says she doesn't it's a phase? Feminism always talks out of both sides of it's mouth. They will drone on about how women are stereotyped and expected to be traditionally feminine, only to harp about how women not being traditionally feminine is a toxic act that degrades women.
@@EagDesert Not looking for an argument here, but all I can say is the world isn't black and white dude.
Been there! Horryfing. Also, thanks for putting in words why I feel sth off about Jennifer Lawrence
@@EagDesert Dude no. I've been through that phase myself. It's not that we "naturally" like pink, but because girls are taught that "pink" is associated with feminine qualities (think of all the cartoons and shows where there's a group of guys and one girl, chances are she'll be wearing pink) and woman are looked down upon for being weak (You hit/scream/kick/etc like a girl), squeamish (EEK! A bug! Oh, no, I broke one of my perfectly manicured nails trying to get away my day is ruined ;_;), and generally "uncool" compared to their male counterparts, who generally have more well-rounded characters.
TL;DR It's not that we actually hate pink, it's that there are patriarchal societal pressures that coerce girls into thinking that liking pink is "boring" or "Stereotypical".
And if that's *still* too big of a concept to grasp, think about it this way: Why don't boys like pink? There's your answer. It's the same reason girls are taught not to like pink.
It's fine to like pink. I like pink. I think people should wear it more often, it's a nice color.
The gone girl monologue is soo iconic I remember being absolutely shook the first time I saw it. Completely blew the cool girl trope apart and changed cinema in my opinion
So... every "cool girl" is a psychopath pretending?
Shape Shifter No. Did you even watch the video?
Changed cinema? How?
It didn't shock me, it was just hearing my inner dialogue out loud.
It really shits on the cool girl and I live for it!
Women need to just be themselves and demand more. The moment we stop settling by being others' expectations, we lose all of our own expectations and become miserable or divorced. It's time to just be ourselves from the beginning and expect people to be okay with that because you won't settle for the ones that aren't. Trust me, you'll be surprised how it works.
I spent many years of my life trying to be this "cool girl". Now I'm happy because I'm finally showing my real me without thinking I'm boring :D
men just need to realize they wanna date their bros
So let them! There's plenty of men who don't want a cool girl, so just ignore the guys who want to date a bro.
ooop someone said it
I can confirm. I dated cool girls and tomboys before realizing I like to order the Meat Lovers pizza.
Homie love 😌 but maybe more than homie love 😳😳
Lmaoooo
I believe a lot of women went through the "I'm not like other girls" phase and thought we were being feminists, standing up for girl power and stuff. It took me a while to understand that's not feminist at all, it's actually misogynist.
Sofia 🤦🏻♀️ y’all are confusing
Exactly. In my teen years I thought hating on makeup, hair products, heels, dresses and pink made me sooooo coooool.
I still would rather be caught dead than wearing makeup, pink or a dress but I can recognize there's nothing wrong with it, and the "cool girl" trope is just as misogynistic as the "girly girl" trope.
@@sofiabravo1994 what's confusing exactly? I think everybody expressed their thoughts clearly.
This 💯
Sofia Bravo the whole “not like other girls” idea is internalised misogyny because it puts girls into a box. E.g hyper feminine, sensitive etc. So we thought we were not like other girls because we didn’t have all of those qualities, when now we realise that there is nothing WRONG with being like other girls. We are all unique and NONE of us fit into those strict categories like mentioned in the video.
I actually reject Megan Foxs character in transformers being characterised as a cool girl.
She has these interests, but these are her things and in the scene shown in the opening she actually talks about how not liking her more extensive skill set is a phenomenon with guys she dates.
I agree but shia la beoufs character is the total stereotype reaction
Except she would never disagree or fight with him 🤔 even when he was creeping on her with the sit in my lap thing. We only cheer for him because he is the main character. Anyone else in the film said that to her we’d be at arms… and expect her to tell him off or refuse
A lot of people are comparing the Cool Girl to the Tomboy Trope. And while they may be similar in some ways, I don’t think The Cool Girl is the same as a tomboy, considering the Cool Girl is a lot more feminine while the Tomboy is a lot more masculine.
And also including the fact there are entirely different videos on the two.
If you want to know the major difference between the two, I’d suggest watching “Tomboys Explained” by Professor Lando
Weird because the cool girl shits on feminine things
“I wanna date a girl who’s like one of the guys” don’t be a coward, just date one of the guys!
🤣🤣🤣
So you're saying girls can't share the same interests as guys? Why date someone if they don't share the same interests.
@@jamesgentry13 idk how to reply to this comment. I agree with what ur saying but I think ur missing the point
@@Ajwad99 I think you miss the point when we say we want to date a girl that is like one of the guys.
@@jamesgentry13 it was a joke 😑
Mila Kunis has made a whole career playing cool girls.
Edit: I'm not saying that's all that she's good for, just that's where she now makes the big bucks.
And that's why all the men love her.
Her character on That 70's Show was the antithesis to the Tomboyish red head. In one episode the guys joked that imagined her mute she was hot. So, no.
@@CulinaryGuide Yeah Jackie was a girlie girl but Mila's mainstream success definitely comes from playing the cool girl.
True, Mila was the "Cool Girl" in "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" and "Extant", the complete polar opposite of Jackie!😀
I think that's an overstatement. She may be most well-known for That 70's Show, and she also had a huge role in Black Swan and has been voice acting on Family Guy for years. A lot of her romantic comedy roles have been "cool girls," sure, but she's done a lot more than just romantic comedies.
“None of these things matter unless the girl is supremely beautiful”. THIS.
ok, so I watched Gone Girl the other day and was pretty much blown away, but I do have to admit that the thing that got me was more-so the story, and the overall narrative about relationships in general. I don't think I ever got to reason as much the direction of the cool girl trope as after the end of this video. this was eye-opening and humbling. Thanks!
aw anne hathaway saying "it came true" while looking at her award is so pure :( why would people dislike her, she's genuinely a sweetheart without trying to be everyones favourite
As much as i agree with that, i think it's partially because she's an actor, and it's a proffesion that, at least in it's on-screen variant, is about convincing the audience that you are a regular, normal person with few special skills. In fact any oscar winning actor is that years single best liar, having been voted better at convincing people that they are not 'putting on an act' than 3.6billion other humans that year (in either a leading or supporting role). And i think the fact that Hathaway wasn't putting any real effort into maintaining the pretense of not being an actress (which is an actor's entire job, at least on film) just rubbed people the wrong way, and they couldn't just be happy to see someone do a very difficult thing successfully.
I don't, however, think there's any point saying that her or Lawrences 'performances' were more genuine- they're actors, we shouldn't really be demanding they stop being. Asking for actors to be honest, or genuine is pointless, as if they were more honest or genuine we'd probably stop watching their films on account of them being so poorly acted.
Right? I love her
true, she's my fave
exactly. Anne Hathaway brings 110% to any role she does.
@@Marie-di5gl indeed
they want a cool girl who doesn’t just “order a salad” but then if a fat woman loves food everyone’s a doctor 😐😐
Exactly. Like if I only ordered the food you do I wouldn’t be fit, what you are seeking in a woman? Do they know how calories work
No woman finds fat men attractive. That's all.
Alrune La Brune Dude, are you SERIOUSLY gonna comment this on EVERY comment that references the food preference category of this trope? Your argument is tired, it’s bored, and it wants to got to bed. Just bundle it up in the remainder of your new-wave misogyny and let it rest.
@@impish_snake3526 This argument is true. That's why you have to come up with the usual "misogyny" thing to dismiss it, plus I can speak from experience since I'm a woman myself.
We just don't find fat men attractive, thus we can't command men to find fat women attractive on the other hand, it's only fair. Else, we just need to tell it like it is: body positiviy is for women only.
Impish_Snake lol 😂 you owned him
@12:08: Indeed, if a woman should be praised for being "not like other girls", a man should therefore be praised for being "not like other guys".
I don't think it's exactly fair to claim that every single girl ever that could fall into these personality traits is faking it
she mentioned that as well..
if u watched most of the video, that is a point she makes..
Cara Delevigne was also “ a cool girl”. In a world of femenine models she was the “ fun bit awkward but still gorgeous exception ”, playing videogames and eating a whole pizza before Victotia’s secret fashion show while other girls starve themselves and did a lot of work out, but of course still being skinny and perfectly beautiful for the show. Adding that she is bisexual and man have fetishized so much lesbian relationships , became her the complete male fantasy. It was after she cut her hair, took a feminist speech and started to look and being less of a perfect woman for man that she became her true self
Well said!
Carolina Garcia i still feel like she tries to put out that persona, but way less than before
Lol why is that more of a true self. I love Cara Delevingne, but you're just projecting.
Azatris i love her too! But to me her behavior was similar in the one explained in the video😂 it’s just an opinion based in what i just watch. I said that she was more herself because the way she changed in the public eye after leaving VS
And that’s just a harmless opinion that is completely debatable
You forgot to mention how when Megan Fox tried to have a voice outside of the "Cool Girl" trope and show agency within her own life was fired from her film series for being too "controversial".
What Hollywood did to her was an atrocity.
She talked about Michael bay positioning her as sexualised through mikaela banes and how she didn’t like it. She said she got frustrated at his directives. When she asked Bay where to look during a scene or who she was talking to, he just said be hot or sexy. So she eventually didn’t want to be typecasted anymore into the hot or cool girl trope and began to speak her mind in various magazine publications about her frustration with Bay and she got blacklisted from Hollywood and fired from transformers 3. Now she doesn’t really do too much acting roles and focuses on motherhood, and doing some roles on the side
There’s a couple of newer interviews on RUclips where she talks about it a little bit & how Jennifer’s Body changed her for good & bad. They’re really good interviews. I believe it’s Entertainment Tonight’s channel.
She also said Michael Bay was like Hitler
"Atrocity" is a little strong, but yeah she was shut down when she spoke up. If she were a better actress she might have survived the controversy but um nope.
@@mermaidcattt She was 23 what's Michael's excuse for his immaturity as a full middle-aged man?
"The cool girl" also has femininity. A girl can like sports, muscle cars, and comics and still be feminine.
At this stage I don't even know who I really am
Anne Hathaway was wronged. She didn't deserve all that hate.
F to prove that I always love her
I know, I always felt sad whenever I saw horrible comments abt her.
Agreed, she seems like a genuinely great person. However, I don't think the hate stemmed from sexism as it wasn't only men who were bashing her.
For real
@@hollywoodshopaholic tbf women buy into misogyny, like, all the time. Nobody is immune to brainwashing.
I think that the cool girl is a way for guys to visually get what they want while simultaneously putting in minimal effort because the cool girl is down for whatever.
Omg this comment. This is exactly what it is
On point👏
Yep! This!
Nailed it!
Is this a criticism of men? What man wouldn't want to be with a woman who's hot, easy-going, and shares all of his interests?
Guys invented "cool girls who are their bro"
Girls invented "romantic guys who prioritize them all time"
But i personally think rom-coms are gradually improving
Human beings are complex. You cannot label someone as "the cool girl" or "the good girl" or even "the bad boy" and expect them to fit that label fully and display all the characteristics. People dont work like that
When a guy tells you you’re not like other girls he’s basically saying he thinks very small of women, and you fall into the less intimidating, liberal, strong woman, he’s afraid of. He’s not worth it then. Just run sis.
Or he may think you're a unique person, "the one" that stands out from the crowd. Why would you want to be just like other girls? Why would he be with you if you're no different than other girls? Why would you be with him I'd he was just a carbon copy of other guys?
Btw, I've seen plenty of romance novel covers to know women have "fantasy men" as well.
@@QarthCEO then men can just say "youre not like anyone I've ever met before" or "youre unique". The facts are that there are very negative connotations surrounding the words "other girls" and it's usually not meant in the way you describe. Typically when a boy tells a girl that, is when she starts to see Other Girls as Bad. There's better compliments.
It actually amazes me how they all say the same exact thing. I straight up laughed at one the other day when he told me, "I'm not like other guys." Girl I didn't even hold it in! Lmaooo "No offense, but every last one of y'all says that. Cut it out."
Liz Neptune girl it’s not a compliment at all😂 💁🏾♀️ and these BOYS need new source material
It just depends on the guy it's coming from and the context
I remember seeing Megan Fox's character in Transformers and just LAUGHING out loud at how painfully unreal her character was. She wasn't even an attempt at a real person. She was just a conglomeration of male insecurities come to life.
IRL, I've noticed that plenty of guys HATE girls who share their interests because they 1) assume the girls are putting it on to get male attention, and 2) can't reconcile being attracted to someone who might actually challenge them.
Yeah that scene is literally the only part of that movie I remember and it still makes me laugh. OMG SHE SO HOT and she's FIXING A CAR WAAT
funnily enough I found her dialogue pretty okay, but the camera focus was always on the male character or how hot she was.
Literally her whole thing is that she's tired of dating guys who are assholes and don't care about her or her interests. But instead of being single or finding a decent person, she settles for an insecure dork who doesn't actually respect her or see her as more of an individual than the assholes she was with before, he's just insecure enough to indulge her interests and compromise sometimes.
She's the only good thing about the movie if you only read the script
tHIS. So much. I've always tried to prove myself to guys and be interested in what they are interested in to be seen as cool. And making it seem effortless, but it's like I can never challenge them - they always need to be that bit more knowledgable
@@TigerPrawn_ wth? Why are you trying to be into what they are into? Real guys don't want a shadow, they want someone with their own interests and pursuits. You shouldn't want to be with a guy that thinks they want someone just like them because they will just get bored anyway. Be yourself and find real friends/lovers.
You can't even imagine how much this video has changed my perspective
Ok, i understand that this hot girl with traditionally male interests pops up as a male fantasy in films and literature BUT, calling this out as a female personality invented by men means that everytime a woman strays from the traditional female personality pattern we can now turn around and say: look at her, she's being fake, she's pretending to be someone she's not just to please men. And that is problematic on a whole other level!
that is also very true!
exactly!!
Women who like being traditionally feminine: 👑
Women who are tomboys and are not traditionally feminine: 👑
People who hate on each other for their choices: 🤡
It’s so interesting because Jennifer Lawrence started to come across as annoying at the same time Anne Hathaway was “redeemed”
I really don't like Jennifer as a person and also, she can"t act!! 😂, Ann in the other hand, can act and is classy and inteligent, I love her.
Aye, it’s like, well these women are different, and you cannot possibly like them both!!!!
Rua O'Neill why not? I like them both. I don’t see anything wrong with either of these people. Maybe it’s because I’m not sexist and I support women, I don’t know
@@bonbon2225 someone not liking a particular female celebrity isnt sexist lol...
ᶘ oᴥoᶅ : no, but putting one woman down to raise another woman up is. Which is what the other person did. They are insinuating that Anne Hathaway is better because she is “classy” and “intelligent” as if Jennifer wasn’t which is an uninformed judgement to make. Even if Jennifer wasn’t classy or intelligent that doesn’t make her any less valid.
The “cool girl” is evolving into “relatable, funny person”
omg why's this so true
Omg and i hate them both 😂😂
Or just a person
True. Differnt names but same meaning. For example, we can see it very clearly with a lot of youtubers like Emma Chamberlain.
@@minaharker6641 Why tho?
Brilliant analysis, thank you! This is fascinating and reflects alot of experiences in my own life