Excellent points! I had enough after my unfaithful ex fiancé left, for me to change. And before we broke up, I had enough to get on RUclips and learn, teying to change. But since he left, I finally stopped being immobilized. I wanted to move forward physically and tried, but a force would hit me and shut me down. I didn't understand it. That force has not been present. I don't know why. I fear it returning. I am taking action now in ways I have not done in a few years since my unfairhful ex husband left me pregnant with 5 kids. I am finally dedicated and committed to me. Not in an unhealthy way, but in a way I always should have been. I used to let myself be abused and neglected myself. Thank you for your videos. Keep going!
Only 2 weeks since my DDay. I’m getting super frustrated. I’ve been putting in all the effort and research and I’m the betrayed spouse. I hear promises, sorries & more transparency and affection, but I don’t see any initiation to move forward to his recovery. I send him 2 video blogs a day that he watches. I’m praying something will light a flame. I think he thinks he will change on his own because he wants to change, but I know he cannot without God and expert help. Maybe I’m not “angry” enough. I feel God has given me peace and strength to endure this horrible season. I knew in my gut before DDay so I had already been praying. I hate feeling stuck and being out of control. Some days I want to escape my own mind/body. Thank you so much for your blog. Are you and/or Samantha available to connect with?
hi there. you can email me a brief email at samuel@hope-now.com. samantha works a full time job and is unable to be as accessible as i am. she will be more accessible on the upcoming podcast though. :)
Hello Samuel, I have been watching and fallowing your blogs for the last 6 months or so and I'd like to start by saying thank you for all that you do. Your blogs have really been a beacon of light to me in a world of utter darkness. Thank you for that. I need some help with this one if you would be so gracious. I am at that point where I am very much fed up as a betrayed spouse. But the situation is a little complicated and I don't know where to go from here. Might there possibly be an email I might be able to explain further? I'd really rather not post this out for public vue. I know you must get hundreds of requests like this, but if possible I'd be very grateful. Thank you so very much for all that you do.
I am at a tipping point. My wife had an affair 15 years ago when our son was less than a year old. I forgave her and thought we moved on. I discovered in 2019 that she had gotten back together with him. in the past 3.5 years she has gaslighted me into believeing that they nothing was going on. Last month, she finally admitted that they had been sleeping together for 10 years. In fact I discovered it when she was on a business trip and I had to call her affair partner to find out that they were having sex the moment I texted her that I discovered they were back together. She has lied to 2 marriage couselors and her own therapist. The only reason I can find to continue to work with her is I recently found out her birth mother killed herself, her brother, and tried to kill her. She recently was diagnosed with bi polar depression and is being treated for that. She has stopped going to her therapist. Getting her to tell the truth is so difficult. I don't know how to move forward at this snails pace.
I have a tug of war with the consistency of my on recovery, bc of the callous of his way of feeling and when I ask for details to soothe, it brakes my bridges, bc it hurts, but he tries to salves me with saying I'm trying to be ok with you or without you and it hurts due to the severity of his infidelity it just leaves me lost and confused at times.
I have been at my tipping point since earlier this month and decided to move fwd with the divorce, but the pandemic hit. He's not supporting our family financially and that is one of my triggers. Do you have any suggestions on how to administer consequences while in this waiting period?
Excellent points! I had enough after my unfaithful ex fiancé left, for me to change. And before we broke up, I had enough to get on RUclips and learn, teying to change. But since he left, I finally stopped being immobilized. I wanted to move forward physically and tried, but a force would hit me and shut me down. I didn't understand it. That force has not been present. I don't know why. I fear it returning. I am taking action now in ways I have not done in a few years since my unfairhful ex husband left me pregnant with 5 kids. I am finally dedicated and committed to me. Not in an unhealthy way, but in a way I always should have been. I used to let myself be abused and neglected myself. Thank you for your videos. Keep going!
Only 2 weeks since my DDay. I’m getting super frustrated. I’ve been putting in all the effort and research and I’m the betrayed spouse. I hear promises, sorries & more transparency and affection, but I don’t see any initiation to move forward to his recovery. I send him 2 video blogs a day that he watches. I’m praying something will light a flame. I think he thinks he will change on his own because he wants to change, but I know he cannot without God and expert help. Maybe I’m not “angry” enough. I feel God has given me peace and strength to endure this horrible season. I knew in my gut before DDay so I had already been praying. I hate feeling stuck and being out of control. Some days I want to escape my own mind/body. Thank you so much for your blog. Are you and/or Samantha available to connect with?
hi there. you can email me a brief email at samuel@hope-now.com. samantha works a full time job and is unable to be as accessible as i am. she will be more accessible on the upcoming podcast though. :)
How are you doing now?
Hello Samuel,
I have been watching and fallowing your blogs for the last 6 months or so and I'd like to start by saying thank you for all that you do. Your blogs have really been a beacon of light to me in a world of utter darkness. Thank you for that. I need some help with this one if you would be so gracious. I am at that point where I am very much fed up as a betrayed spouse. But the situation is a little complicated and I don't know where to go from here. Might there possibly be an email I might be able to explain further? I'd really rather not post this out for public vue. I know you must get hundreds of requests like this, but if possible I'd be very grateful. Thank you so very much for all that you do.
you can send me a brief email at samuel@hope-now.com
Thank u ❤️
I am at a tipping point. My wife had an affair 15 years ago when our son was less than a year old. I forgave her and thought we moved on. I discovered in 2019 that she had gotten back together with him. in the past 3.5 years she has gaslighted me into believeing that they nothing was going on. Last month, she finally admitted that they had been sleeping together for 10 years. In fact I discovered it when she was on a business trip and I had to call her affair partner to find out that they were having sex the moment I texted her that I discovered they were back together. She has lied to 2 marriage couselors and her own therapist. The only reason I can find to continue to work with her is I recently found out her birth mother killed herself, her brother, and tried to kill her. She recently was diagnosed with bi polar depression and is being treated for that. She has stopped going to her therapist. Getting her to tell the truth is so difficult. I don't know how to move forward at this snails pace.
I have a tug of war with the consistency of my on recovery, bc of the callous of his way of feeling and when I ask for details to soothe, it brakes my bridges, bc it hurts, but he tries to salves me with saying I'm trying to be ok with you or without you and it hurts due to the severity of his infidelity it just leaves me lost and confused at times.
I really enjoyed the video
If you’re a co-dependant spouse how do you take some power back? It’s very difficult.
i would get help for the codependency my friend and start to really do work on that aspect first.
I have.... Tried but I get this thrown at me. I'm just a control freak. Its all I want is control. :/
I have been at my tipping point since earlier this month and decided to move fwd with the divorce, but the pandemic hit. He's not supporting our family financially and that is one of my triggers. Do you have any suggestions on how to administer consequences while in this waiting period?
perhaps doing an in house separation and pulling back and self soothing. it's vital you're able to take care of yourself and your own healing.
I am...I am at that point...
glad to hear. healing awaits you my friend.
Yup take some action