0:00: 🧠 We need to observe and manage our minds to identify and address negative patterns that impact us. 6:40: 🧠 Our thoughts and experiences are stored as vibrations in the brain, shaping our mind and creating meaning. 13:27: 🔑 Toxic thoughts from past experiences can affect our ability to attract healthy love in the future. 20:09: 🔑 The speaker emphasizes the importance of looking at individuals as unique human beings before considering their gender in relationships. 26:29: 🤝 It is important to acknowledge the impact of both positive and negative experiences in life. 32:52: 💥 Living in isolated and pressure-filled environments can lead to relationship problems and explosive arguments. 39:53: ✨ Steps to heal a broken relationship and create harmony. 45:33: 💡 The speaker discusses the importance of focusing on positive aspects of oneself and one's partner to build resilience in relationships. 52:06: 📚 The speaker reflects on the impact of words and the importance of communication in childhood. 58:28: 🧠 Creating a mind management space can improve mental health. 1:05:49: ❤ How to support and love someone who frequently harms themselves. 1:11:42: 🔧 In an intimate relationship, if someone feels broken, they can either become more reactive or withdraw. 1:18:26: ✅ Validating and listening to someone with bipolar disorder is important to understand their experiences and emotions. Recap by Tammy AI
Alchemy of thoughts is a crucial skill. The science is intriguing... sometimes it feels like scientists and doctors dig so deep they go past where is necessary, and they study the building materials rather than the structures. Dr. Leaf definitely goes deep, but she also looks for the roots, and that's where answers start to develop.
@@CONEHEADDK I can define where is necessary, I might not be able to determine where it is though. You don't have to know a single thing about chemical processes to get an idea as to why the body produces them, sure having the knowledge will help understand the "hows" of things happening, that doesn't necessarily tell you the "why" of things happening. Some people get so caught up on how that they completely overlook why, and vice-versa. When it comes to behavior, the why probably takes priority over the how. In certain cases, it makes more sense to be able to understand things rather to be just be able to replicate them. Replication doesn't guarantee understanding, but it definitely can help.
@@ignorantlyspeaking If scientists knew, what the results of their science would be, and what the future would bring, and what would be best for everybody involved, then MAYBE it could be possible to define necassary.. But they can't, and neither can you - or I.
@@CONEHEADDK i cannot determine what is necessary, but I can definitely define it. I probably could determine it if I had a goal as to what I wanted to study though. It's not that difficult. In that case I would probably prefer to replicate what I am studying, and then reverse engineer it, as I would want margin for trial and error. I just wouldn't fixate on the how if the why was a more pressing matter, which is almost entirely the case when it comes to behavior. The medicinal and medical values of replicating behavioral processes do not go unseen though. Intrusive treatments/procesures could suppress, regulate, or increase important functions which could help people with psychosis or illnesses. It could be extremely beneficial. Though, it's still likely more practical to understand why things are the way they are, before going and trying to create the ideal behaved human. I wouldn't limit anyone... People always thought humans could fly, but they probably didn't think it would be by building a box +5x their own weight and getting inside it. That is how it happened though. Counterintuitive thinking leads to wonderful things. In the case of behavior, given how smart the brain is, I still say it's more pragmatic to understand the why over the how.
@@ignorantlyspeaking I'm pretty sure, that we actually agree. I was just pointing at the word necassary, that is very fluent, unless you have a very exact goal. You and I would probably have a different goal for mental patients than many others, who would have more focus on short term costs. Your plane thing reminds of H. Ford's clamied words: "If I were to listen to the customers, I should have designed a faster horse.". They wanted a problem solved, but would probably never had voted for his idea, and still ended up happy to pay for it.
Biggest takeaway - your first real "love" and how that relationship went is actually what shapes how we are in relationships! What an eye opener! I've had trauma in my life but that comment really was lightbulb moment for me. Part 2 PLEASE!
Finaly some really good and healthy advice on love! This is why being single is absolutely nothing anyone should feel ashamed or sad about. It can be an extremely valuable time to figure out who you are and what exactly you are looking for and heal what needs healing. ❤
Romantic relationships are not a beautiful thing. Romance causes a lot of problems in this world. Life is a lot better without romance than it is with it. Romantic love is not special at all, and I think that the romantic type of love isn't real. More than half of romantic couples either break up with each other or divorce each other, And most couples who are still together are usually not happy being together. Also, there are a lot of toxic romantic relationships. Like an example is that abuse happens a lot in romantic relationships.
I immediately picked up South African accent 🇿🇦, when she said she was born in Zimbabwe 🇿🇼 I was like aaahh I wasn’t far off. Great interview/episode 🙏🏾
Wow, I wish every person on this planet would watch this. Such a powerful conversation. Wonderful questions Lewis. I adore Dr Leafs humility.,brilliance and compassion ❤
As a child of divorced parents I never felt it was my fault, but DEFINITELY feel 100% responsible for their happiness since they are alone and don’t have a spouse or partner.
That's so sad! They are grown and in charge of their own happiness and life. I have two little boys 5 & 6 and I am also divorced. I hope they don't feel responsible for my happiness. I'm the only one who can make myself happy. I don't want them to be co-dependent like that.
lol mine are both remarried and i rarely see them or their new families lol only child. my main issue is being a third wheel to my friends relationships just like how my childhood was
@@LeahBreHappy They will, it's natural. But it's your duty to make it clear to them that they are free of responsibility for your happiness. That they are only responsible for their own individual happiness. And that you will be all right :))
I must admit, as a French person, her accent is challenging. But I love what she says. Her analysis is really complete and practical. She gives sound and useful advice. Thank you Lewis, your conversations are always so powerful. 😊💚
You are not alone ! I tried different speeds I was trying to figure out why I had a hard time to listen to her & understand without concentration 🧘♂️ I’m not sure it’s an accent or click was it the microphone ? I found the speech choppy and with a click 🐓 sound or cluck 🦆 frequent throughout every sentence. I am fluent and native English speaker here along with communication french . I appreciated the host summaries. Caroline leaf certainly has interesting things to say so I stuck with it.
Just wow. Incredible interview. The biggest take away is explaining how to do the protocol. How you need to repair the relationship with yourself and a partner who is always pointing out faults really doesn't love you. They are seeing things in them self they need to repair but wanna do it in you instead. I love how she Gave tools to return the physical and mental to more relaxed state.
I love how Lewis processes what she says out loud whether it's for clarity for himself, or for us, or both... it helps a LOT to get a deeper understanding of what's being said 💜
I love this conversation ❤ I train my kids to open up what their feeling eveyday and I ask them to share their story about them all day at school or just being at home. So I know what they’re going through. Ask them if they have new friends and if they are happy and enjoy going to school to check them they’re okay all the time..We meditate/pray together before going to sleep. And we can only share good stories before sleeping and we do take a deep breath before sleeping to have peace while asleep❤❤❤❤ They are 6&9yo❤ and they listen and absorb what I say for them to be a happy kid every single day even day fight sometimes😂😂😂
Such amazing information provided in this interview. I’ll be sharing this with everyone who is willing to listen. Thank you Lewis for your continued work towards helping others level up by reaching healthier minds, spirits and connections.
Hi Lewis, I saw your interview with Dr Leaf few years ago and I was blown away by her. I bought three of her books after that interview and I am so grateful for what I have learned about epigenetics and neuroplasticity from her. I must say that you have such a great way of interviewing her (as well as other guests) that you bring out the best answers. You are a great duo!
What Dr Leaf says around 1:18 approx is so important. Putting mental health labels or loose diagnosis on huge problems, is itself problematic. I can see how you end up owning that label instead of working through it. The work is challenging and it doesn’t end but it’s always going to he preferable to labelling your problems and wearing them as an identity !
The conversation between you two is excellent. Dr Leaf is so honest, provides real life examples. Keep bringing her back, you guys are both are wonderful ❤️
I am that person. I have had a great childhood, great parents, great friend circle. And then marriage happened. A broken person and them him projecting his brokenness. And at the initial part of marriage there was no fail safe for me. I couldn't manage my emotions that were mostly anger and helplessness and the grief of what could have, should have , would have. And I was blamed for everything that was bad in the marriage and not my husband's brokenness or his narcissistic mom and unhealthy attachment style and dynamics within his family. There was so much sadness, helplessness in me because I wasn't even aware of what is happening, wasnt equipped with the tools and knowledge I have now. I was blamed and tagged to be the messy one. I am better able to manage emotions, manage expectations. I wish I had come across gem of a video like this earlier. But then another way of saying this is all the healing and positive thought Alchemy I did while I was angry and helpless brought me to this video. Both of you are great! Thank you
Caroline is a fast talker, communication is effective with a slower pace, add to that the density of the scientific themes and it adds up to a hard listen.
I would like a part two. I found her profoundly intuitive and practical. The discussion on anxiety and attachment trauma behaviours in the context of generally happy childhoods, without abuse, and how early childhood and adolescent exoeriences can affect our future relationships is very good, very helpful. I will watch this more than once.❤❤
Excellent definitely a part 2. Would love a focus on assisting 7-9 year Olds in the community. Too many kids are prescribed meds to manage anger issues. Whoever makes the titles of the videos is mis labeling this one. It needs to reach a broad audience not just those in intimate relationships . Thanks Lewis for all you do to try and help and educate your audience 👍.
My mother-in-law was a very toxic person and being around her for 20 years definitely took years of my life. Her depression created a lot of tension in the family.
I been in before 4 longer 2-7 years relationships and only on my last relationship I felt jealous .I felt a lot of emotions that I never before felt that strong.
Part 2 for sure! This was SO amazing and just one of the greatest discussions ever. She really broke down the mind and how it functions so incredibly well with such fantastic visuals! I love a good tactile visual to hold, touch, see. Just a wealth of wisdom and insight into my Self and Others. I especially love the idea of creating that safe space for the whole family, but especially for my kids to go to when they need to process their emotional state to tend to their mind, because I know it’s a space to be with them as well (when that’s what they need and/or want). This was just so great thank you! Super grateful! We need more safe community spaces in all the ways!
Part 2, please! The fact that children as young as 2 can grasp these (simplified) processes was mind blowing. So exciting for what this research and organized process means for this new generation
Thank you Caroline for this information! ❤& validation! Try this method it works!! 20 years of doing it & it’s best decision I’ve ever made in our family with my kiddos 😊
Thank you Caroline, thank you Lewis for this beautiful, enlightening, comforting discussion. I leave this podcast with simple, yet precious tools to help in daily life. And with revived hopes, where I tended to feel I can't be fixed. ❤
We live in a culture that fosters insecurity. And we are very quick to point it out in others in order to make ourselves feel superior, and make others feel badly, sometimes to exert control and dominance over them, or in order to get the upper hand, or be condescending and self righteous. But the truth is that no matter how confident a person is, there is always something they are insecure about. It is totally natural and okay, it is part of being human, especially when having to cope with this ridiculous pretentious fakery constantly beombarding us in the media. We are frequently being compared with, and comparing ourselves to, unrealistic and heavily filtered imagery of attributes, lifestyle, fame, wealth, etc. Perfection which is unattainable. A never ending pursuit for more and better and bigger, but which leads us into disappointment, frustration, exhaustion, nothingness, and eventually mental illness such as depression and anxiety. It is good for us to work on our insecurities and grow stronger and more confident in ourselves, but I think it's is also equally as good to just accept it as a part of being a normal human being, because very much of you we are insecure about and comparing ourselves to, or being compared to, is not reality at all. Hopefully that makes sense. I love your topics, your guests, your views, and your videos in general. Lewis, you are the kindest, most profound, most sensitive, and always interested and interesting host. 💕💕💕💕💕💕
part 2 pls! validate emotions. be strong enough to support others. it is ok to be a mess. supporting increase your health. work on yourself. work on others.
I love that she is advising parents about having a processing space and not trying to give advice to people. I am in the mental health field and she explained it very well.
Really, really good interview, with some wonderful, intelligent questions by Lewis.Dr Caroline Leaf is very impressive.She has the ability to simply and dissect complex life situations in a relatable manner.This is wonderful.
The unspoken sexual tension between these two is palpable! Caroline's amazing. She sure gets directly to the heart of the matter. Great info. ty 4 vid.
Thank you.Yes to part deux please! Caroline's examples helped confirm how the loudspeak of my own inexperienced mom with unresolved issues when I was her 1st young child really did leave deep scars. At 3&4, I somehow reminded Mom of her MiL (who was the primary reason we emigrated) ....let's just say it apparently resulted in much self-speak of what I did and didn't deserve later in life. Who tf knew?!
Oh I am so speechless. I feel this has and will change my life. This is a video I will watch again and refer back to. So much insight. Thank you for posting this. Truly grateful ❤
I loved this conversation and so important how to talk to our children and save them to adapt our bad habits! Eye opening for me and was so grate for the tool Dr. Leaf mentioned! Dear Lewis is always so good to tune to your podcast thank you 🙏🏻
PLEEEEEASE do a part 2! 😊 and also ignore that "thumbs down". Ugh.... I tried to hit the "like" thumbs up and accidentally hit the wrong one. I LOVVVVVVE YOUR CHANNEL LEWIS!!! 💖💖💖💖💖
So true, I met someone friends comes from broken family or Ignored parents cause their avoidant relationship later on, we have to show love and support by listening and understanding, it’s not our responsibility to heal them but why not be the light to be someone’s life when you can. Thank you for this amazing conversation ❤
After watching this interview, I feel more fulfilled. I think we can also take this into a business aspect as well. Show more empathy. It's okay to show levels of weakness that can ultimately lead to improved team chemistry.
Totally agree! Knowing how to be empathic can help you improve communication with others and create great relationships, making for a positive workplace.
I couldn't agree more! Either it's in personal or professional life, communication is the key! Not just knowing how to do it, but also knowing how to do it RIGHT!
Absolutely agree! This interview was truly eye-opening, and I couldn't agree more with the idea of extending empathy and vulnerability into the business world. It's remarkable how fostering a culture of empathy can lead to enhanced teamwork, better communication, and ultimately, improved team chemistry. Acknowledging weaknesses and being open about them can create a space where innovation and collaboration flourish.
Loved this video. Incredible content explained in a way where we can work through our trauma and lead healthier lives. Please create a part 2. Thank you.
I absolutely love Dr.Leaf! She definitely goes deep ❤️And thank you Lewis for all you do! You rock! P.s. I would LOVE to see Matthias Barker (he has lots of knowledge about trauma) on this show as well as Alieen (she’s founder of Lavendaire and helps people create their dream life and such) ☺️⭐️ Thanks again!
Good evening Lewis and Caroline Greatest, wee thankyou to Caroline. Stumbled across your work couple of years ago. Gave me validation both professionally and personally when very much needed. Truly Grateful. 💜
This was an amazing conversation session. I agree with everything she said. I learned so much! 💕 Thank you! So many parts I identified with, but when she talked about people that gets labeled with mental deceases and that makes them think they are broken, that got me. Because I have seen that happening to a love one! Thank you 🙏🏽❤
Part 2 please. I loved the segment that explained how to be present with a child or friend that expresses their experience and how you can valid them and apologize.
I really needed to hear this!! It validates how I am feeling struggling the past 4 months with emotional overwhelm and chronic illness and anxiety and depression and my relationship with my partner has broken down also. I've started working with a psychologist as I can't get anyone else to actually listen to my problems.
ONE CAN NOT FIX SOMEONE ELSE WITHOUT FIRST FIXING THEIRSELF. LACK OF SELF CONTROL DIRECTLY RELATES TO PEOPLE GETTING INVOLVED WITH SOMEONE THAT DOES NOT LEAD TO HAPPINESS. SO HEAL YOURSELF AND LOOK FOR HEALED PERSON THIS LADY SPEAKS PROFOUND TRUTH!!
Wonderful discussion for those who have been diagnosed with a mental illness. It’s not enough to be labeled and then ostracized and seen as weak. These are moments in life we can move out of with CBT neurocycling and presence work. Thank you!!!!
Indeed, a part 2. She is brilliant. I got to comprehend more from her tonight than in the past when I watched her videos. The neuro cycle is brilliant. Thank you.
You cannot heal love issues in you until someone outside of you shows u it’s real. U can’t find loyalty outside of u until someone shows u they have that! Then the hurt person can heal!! Unfortunately healing love isn’t something u can do on your own when ur not the one who broke that. We have to love to heal people. Men need to start loving even if we are broken cuz they are the ones who broke us
Wow, what a wonderful talk. I need to watch and listen to this again. Working on myself to understand how I could be a better person for me and a better parent to 20 something old kids and a wonderful grandmother. This one is one which I will share with my daughter to help guide her with her children. Wish more of this stuff was available when I was a parent of young children but so glad I’m able to help my children now and apologise for my lack of knowledge (I was a pretty good mum, was just overprotective, which lead to stress and anxiety in me and my children). I will be buying the book for sure.
This is probably my frst time watching an interview with Dr Leaf and I learnt quite a lot. I've been doing a lot of studies on brain changes as a result of trauma, and how brain changes affect law of attraction and our ability to manifest, so I loved the earlier section of the video in which she delved into the mind-brain-body connection. I also friggin LOVE her definition of greatness at the end of the video! Honestly I usually don't have the patience to sit through hour-long videos, but I can watch Drs Leaf, Dispenza and Mate all day. Please have more interviews with all three, Lewis. Thank you so much 🙏 30Aug23
This was an incredible conversation! I’m floored how much I connected to the points made here. Very profound and kudos to asking important questions💯❤️
I got both books on Audible, I have 2 boys (10 & 13yrs). I was just thinking about apologizing to kids, and i got my anwer in this podcast. More, please!!
I have heard many types of therapist and esp. with relationships and she has done a fantastic job at explaining why it is necessary to get therapy in the first place (as many don't believe it is needed or beneficial to look back in the rear view mirror). Also, she proves the benefits of therapy including health and the mechanisms of how it could work and does work. Thank you, Lewis! Thank for another super awesome show and guest! :)
Why is the title, they will chase you? I couldn't find anything about that... I'm not sure what to take away. I wish there was a how-to section. It seems so disjointed and rambling, I couldn't find anything helpful to use.
I love everything said in this interview and I love evey question Lewis askedto her. It's amazing to see how well elaborated the questions were. He even asked a question that i had. Awesome message!
The Example About The 5-year old Girl Being observed as a Cute Little Boy, By an outsider, May have been A Reflection of The Thoughts and Emotions the Child Held within herself as acceptable by her Circumstances & Environment & Familiarization.. (PATTERN & HABITS) Yes!! SHE CAN BE RE-FORMED❤ IN EVERY WAY ❤ Namaskaram ❤
I loved this and all the wonderful information. Thank you Lewis and Caroline Leaf!!!!,,,,,I am 70 yrs old and still learning how to have better relationships.
She must be that messiah that most people waiting for. Sincere and Humble in a good great balance, Intelligent and explanation in a good great balance, secure and stable in a good great balance, acceptance and understanding in a good great balance, i it’s like the equilibrium within me just been restore. 😂😅 Thank you, Dr Caroline Leaf.
The part where she talked about your first relationship spoke so much to me. The problem with me was that I dated 2 young ladies and feel I whose very much in love with both we all 3 had this very shared care and we knew even though it was not socially acceptable it became very private with us wen one of us died erley in life me and the other person morn for a peace of us .relationships is something very different form the individual but something that exist on its own wen you open your mind and hart may give you more than you expect abundance love does not care and may take a path that you do not expect.this is not distinction but something special and rare and a gift of the universe were my2 ladies.
Lewis I think you’re such a great human being and I feel like you and I have VERY almost EXACT upbringings because every question that you asked pertained to me
Lewis! Man you really have the best people and knowledgeable podcasts / interviews in your school of greatness... This video is now part of my "most important videos" Playlist and I'm in awe of all of them ❤😢 soooo greatful!! 💯 Thank you humans for your learnings, doings and sharings
Thank you Lewis for all your work! This is all true, I am in my 30’s and I am the best example of “childhood issues/trauma! I grew up in Iraq, so you guys can maybe imagine what I went through. Father was physically not available, mother was emotionally not available for me and yeah where was love?! Nowhere! Plus War, deaths and chaos around you! My Story is long, I could actually write a book about it 😂Now I live in New York and every guy finds me very attractive and wanna date me but I reject every one for some unfounded reason😅 my first experience with a man was also terrible so here I am. So my question is: what’s the most effective way to heal? I try with therapy, yoga and meditation, what does really work? Can someone recommend some tools that works? It would be also great if you could invite people who are healed and can share their experience now and maybe the best way to do it. Thank you 🙏
This was one of the most eye-opening, encouraging and understandable ways I have seen this information conveyed. Thank you both for this valuable insight. Looking forward to a Part 2…
Dear Lewis, I LOVE this podcast. 2 wonderful person in this video. I could listen to the both of you forever and never gets tired! The way you both speaks, the tone of your voice, the peaceful captivating energy!! Thank you for this amazing podcast!
If you grow up with things that cause negative thoughts, you have to retrain your brain to let them go and handle things differently in a positive way to change your pattern of thinking, like if you were an abused child and you turned alcoholism to deal with it, that's a negative Way which to deal with it. If you retrain yourself when you deal with negativity instead of reaching for alcohol, do something you truly enjoy doing to change the chemistry in your body to happy good healthy healing chemicals. Like attracts like
This Is One Of Your Most Useful & Memorable PODCASTS ❤❤ THANK YOU LOWIE❤ I BLASTED THIS PODCAST TO ALL I CARED ABOUT.. Even TO DOCTORS!! Some of Them Must be Pissed😂😂😂😂😂Namaskaram ❤
0:00: 🧠 We need to observe and manage our minds to identify and address negative patterns that impact us.
6:40: 🧠 Our thoughts and experiences are stored as vibrations in the brain, shaping our mind and creating meaning.
13:27: 🔑 Toxic thoughts from past experiences can affect our ability to attract healthy love in the future.
20:09: 🔑 The speaker emphasizes the importance of looking at individuals as unique human beings before considering their gender in relationships.
26:29: 🤝 It is important to acknowledge the impact of both positive and negative experiences in life.
32:52: 💥 Living in isolated and pressure-filled environments can lead to relationship problems and explosive arguments.
39:53: ✨ Steps to heal a broken relationship and create harmony.
45:33: 💡 The speaker discusses the importance of focusing on positive aspects of oneself and one's partner to build resilience in relationships.
52:06: 📚 The speaker reflects on the impact of words and the importance of communication in childhood.
58:28: 🧠 Creating a mind management space can improve mental health.
1:05:49: ❤ How to support and love someone who frequently harms themselves.
1:11:42: 🔧 In an intimate relationship, if someone feels broken, they can either become more reactive or withdraw.
1:18:26: ✅ Validating and listening to someone with bipolar disorder is important to understand their experiences and emotions.
Recap by Tammy AI
Thanks for the breakdown Tammy AI!
I love ppl like u who do this 😁
Thnq for saving my time
That is fantastic!
Now can you please breakdown what's happened in this country's politics since 2016? 😂❤
Year by year?😂❤
Alchemy of thoughts is a crucial skill. The science is intriguing... sometimes it feels like scientists and doctors dig so deep they go past where is necessary, and they study the building materials rather than the structures. Dr. Leaf definitely goes deep, but she also looks for the roots, and that's where answers start to develop.
Define what is necassary? You can't.!
@@CONEHEADDK I can define where is necessary, I might not be able to determine where it is though.
You don't have to know a single thing about chemical processes to get an idea as to why the body produces them, sure having the knowledge will help understand the "hows" of things happening, that doesn't necessarily tell you the "why" of things happening.
Some people get so caught up on how that they completely overlook why, and vice-versa.
When it comes to behavior, the why probably takes priority over the how. In certain cases, it makes more sense to be able to understand things rather to be just be able to replicate them. Replication doesn't guarantee understanding, but it definitely can help.
@@ignorantlyspeaking If scientists knew, what the results of their science would be, and what the future would bring, and what would be best for everybody involved, then MAYBE it could be possible to define necassary.. But they can't, and neither can you - or I.
@@CONEHEADDK i cannot determine what is necessary, but I can definitely define it.
I probably could determine it if I had a goal as to what I wanted to study though. It's not that difficult. In that case I would probably prefer to replicate what I am studying, and then reverse engineer it, as I would want margin for trial and error. I just wouldn't fixate on the how if the why was a more pressing matter, which is almost entirely the case when it comes to behavior. The medicinal and medical values of replicating behavioral processes do not go unseen though. Intrusive treatments/procesures could suppress, regulate, or increase important functions which could help people with psychosis or illnesses. It could be extremely beneficial. Though, it's still likely more practical to understand why things are the way they are, before going and trying to create the ideal behaved human. I wouldn't limit anyone...
People always thought humans could fly, but they probably didn't think it would be by building a box +5x their own weight and getting inside it. That is how it happened though. Counterintuitive thinking leads to wonderful things. In the case of behavior, given how smart the brain is, I still say it's more pragmatic to understand the why over the how.
@@ignorantlyspeaking I'm pretty sure, that we actually agree. I was just pointing at the word necassary, that is very fluent, unless you have a very exact goal. You and I would probably have a different goal for mental patients than many others, who would have more focus on short term costs. Your plane thing reminds of H. Ford's clamied words: "If I were to listen to the customers, I should have designed a faster horse.". They wanted a problem solved, but would probably never had voted for his idea, and still ended up happy to pay for it.
Biggest takeaway - your first real "love" and how that relationship went is actually what shapes how we are in relationships! What an eye opener! I've had trauma in my life but that comment really was lightbulb moment for me. Part 2 PLEASE!
🧡
"You're gonna go from relationship to relationship looking for something missing in you" ... Thank you both for the enlightenment !
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
Finaly some really good and healthy advice on love! This is why being single is absolutely nothing anyone should feel ashamed or sad about. It can be an extremely valuable time to figure out who you are and what exactly you are looking for and heal what needs healing. ❤
Romantic relationships are not a beautiful thing. Romance causes a lot of problems in this world. Life is a lot better without romance than it is with it. Romantic love is not special at all, and I think that the romantic type of love isn't real. More than half of romantic couples either break up with each other or divorce each other, And most couples who are still together are usually not happy being together.
Also, there are a lot of toxic romantic relationships. Like an example is that abuse happens a lot in romantic relationships.
I immediately picked up South African accent 🇿🇦, when she said she was born in Zimbabwe 🇿🇼 I was like aaahh I wasn’t far off. Great interview/episode 🙏🏾
Thanks for being here!
Wow, I wish every person on this planet would watch this. Such a powerful conversation. Wonderful questions Lewis. I adore Dr Leafs humility.,brilliance and compassion ❤
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
Lewis's energy exudes so much kindness and compassion. You hear it in the way he asks questions 🙏🏾😊. Thank you much for this healing episode
Lewis is a great interviewer, he always comes from a place of curiosity...an apt pupil. Well done as usual, Lewis!
I want a part two. This is so important. For the relationships of everyone in my family. To repair so much trauma in our family.
As a child of divorced parents I never felt it was my fault, but DEFINITELY feel 100% responsible for their happiness since they are alone and don’t have a spouse or partner.
That's so sad! They are grown and in charge of their own happiness and life. I have two little boys 5 & 6 and I am also divorced. I hope they don't feel responsible for my happiness. I'm the only one who can make myself happy. I don't want them to be co-dependent like that.
lol mine are both remarried and i rarely see them or their new families lol only child. my main issue is being a third wheel to my friends relationships just like how my childhood was
@@LeahBreHappy They will, it's natural. But it's your duty to make it clear to them that they are free of responsibility for your happiness. That they are only responsible for their own individual happiness. And that you will be all right :))
I must admit, as a French person, her accent is challenging. But I love what she says. Her analysis is really complete and practical. She gives sound and useful advice. Thank you Lewis, your conversations are always so powerful. 😊💚
yea i feel like she stops a word before it ends im trying to follow tho
Excellent content so informative but I too, am struggling with accent, as well as speed of speech, short breaths, and stopping mid-word.
You are not alone ! I tried different speeds I was trying to figure out why I had a hard time to listen to her & understand without concentration 🧘♂️ I’m not sure it’s an accent or click was it the microphone ? I found the speech choppy and with a click 🐓 sound or cluck 🦆 frequent throughout every sentence. I am fluent and native English speaker here along with communication french . I appreciated the host summaries. Caroline leaf certainly has interesting things to say so I stuck with it.
@@vmasters2689= yes
Just wow. Incredible interview. The biggest take away is explaining how to do the protocol. How you need to repair the relationship with yourself and a partner who is always pointing out faults really doesn't love you. They are seeing things in them self they need to repair but wanna do it in you instead. I love how she Gave tools to return the physical and mental to more relaxed state.
🙌
I love how Lewis processes what she says out loud whether it's for clarity for himself, or for us, or both... it helps a LOT to get a deeper understanding of what's being said 💜
Agree. Dr Leaf is so passionate and this is why she talks "lots and fast"...a bit difficult for some of us to process without his help.
i love the big guy
I love this conversation ❤ I train my kids to open up what their feeling eveyday and I ask them to share their story about them all day at school or just being at home. So I know what they’re going through. Ask them if they have new friends and if they are happy and enjoy going to school to check them they’re okay all the time..We meditate/pray together before going to sleep. And we can only share good stories before sleeping and we do take a deep breath before sleeping to have peace while asleep❤❤❤❤ They are 6&9yo❤ and they listen and absorb what I say for them to be a happy kid every single day even day fight sometimes😂😂😂
Love this. Thank you for sharing. 🧡
Very insightful, I’d love to listen to Caroline again! Thanks 💯😉
You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡
Such amazing information provided in this interview. I’ll be sharing this with everyone who is willing to listen. Thank you Lewis for your continued work towards helping others level up by reaching healthier minds, spirits and connections.
You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡
Most definitely want a part 2 of the conversation. The conversation is helping so much.
Means a lot!!! Glad this was helpful for you🧡
agreed!
Hi Lewis, I saw your interview with Dr Leaf few years ago and I was blown away by her. I bought three of her books after that interview and I am so grateful for what I have learned about epigenetics and neuroplasticity from her. I must say that you have such a great way of interviewing her (as well as other guests) that you bring out the best answers. You are a great duo!
Love hearing this! Thank you so much 🧡
She came to my church back in 2016 here in Syracuse, NY and was AWESOME!!! ♥️🙏🏿🤗
Was it Abundant Life
@@JustACat613 Yes! With Pastor Carter🙏🏿♥️
@@MsE711 knew it! That man knows Bible.
What Dr Leaf says around 1:18 approx is so important. Putting mental health labels or loose diagnosis on huge problems, is itself problematic. I can see how you end up owning that label instead of working through it. The work is challenging and it doesn’t end but it’s always going to he preferable to labelling your problems and wearing them as an identity !
The conversation between you two is excellent. Dr Leaf is so honest, provides real life examples. Keep bringing her back, you guys are both are wonderful ❤️
I am that person. I have had a great childhood, great parents, great friend circle. And then marriage happened. A broken person and them him projecting his brokenness. And at the initial part of marriage there was no fail safe for me. I couldn't manage my emotions that were mostly anger and helplessness and the grief of what could have, should have , would have. And I was blamed for everything that was bad in the marriage and not my husband's brokenness or his narcissistic mom and unhealthy attachment style and dynamics within his family. There was so much sadness, helplessness in me because I wasn't even aware of what is happening, wasnt equipped with the tools and knowledge I have now. I was blamed and tagged to be the messy one. I am better able to manage emotions, manage expectations.
I wish I had come across gem of a video like this earlier. But then another way of saying this is all the healing and positive thought Alchemy I did while I was angry and helpless brought me to this video. Both of you are great! Thank you
my story is a copy of this!
Life changing episode. Definitely going to keep her on my radar from now on. thank you.
Thank you so much for watching!
Caroline is a fast talker, communication is effective with a slower pace, add to that the density of the scientific themes and it adds up to a hard listen.
I think she is so so brilliant and so grounded and caring!
Thank you so much for your feedback 🙂
She is great! I saw her presentation at my Christian church in Fresno Ca❤❤❤
I would like a part two. I found her profoundly intuitive and practical. The discussion on anxiety and attachment trauma behaviours in the context of generally happy childhoods, without abuse, and how early childhood and adolescent exoeriences can affect our future relationships is very good, very helpful. I will watch this more than once.❤❤
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
Caroline saying it is okay to be messy, but you can move through it helps to
validate our feelings. Thanks Lewis
Excellent definitely a part 2. Would love a focus on assisting 7-9 year Olds in the community. Too many kids are prescribed meds to manage anger issues. Whoever makes the titles of the videos is mis labeling this one. It needs to reach a broad audience not just those in intimate relationships . Thanks Lewis for all you do to try and help and educate your audience 👍.
I do this with my kids❤ they’re my heart, they matter more than my ego and anger.
My mother-in-law was a very toxic person and being around her for 20 years definitely took years of my life. Her depression created a lot of tension in the family.
I been in before 4 longer 2-7 years relationships and only on my last relationship I felt jealous .I felt a lot of emotions that I never before felt that strong.
Part 2 for sure! This was SO amazing and just one of the greatest discussions ever. She really broke down the mind and how it functions so incredibly well with such fantastic visuals! I love a good tactile visual to hold, touch, see. Just a wealth of wisdom and insight into my Self and Others. I especially love the idea of creating that safe space for the whole family, but especially for my kids to go to when they need to process their emotional state to tend to their mind, because I know it’s a space to be with them as well (when that’s what they need and/or want). This was just so great thank you! Super grateful! We need more safe community spaces in all the ways!
Appreciate you for watching.
Part 2, please! The fact that children as young as 2 can grasp these (simplified) processes was mind blowing. So exciting for what this research and organized process means for this new generation
Thank you Caroline for this information! ❤& validation!
Try this method it works!!
20 years of doing it & it’s best decision I’ve ever made in our family with my kiddos 😊
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Thank you Caroline, thank you Lewis for this beautiful, enlightening, comforting discussion. I leave this podcast with simple, yet precious tools to help in daily life. And with revived hopes, where I tended to feel I can't be fixed. ❤
You're welcome!
Part 2 for sure. I love her. Found her in 2017 rewiring the mind. It literally saved my life. Thank you, such a delight 😊 ❤
We live in a culture that fosters insecurity. And we are very quick to point it out in others in order to make ourselves feel superior, and make others feel badly, sometimes to exert control and dominance over them, or in order to get the upper hand, or be condescending and self righteous. But the truth is that no matter how confident a person is, there is always something they are insecure about. It is totally natural and okay, it is part of being human, especially when having to cope with this ridiculous pretentious fakery constantly beombarding us in the media. We are frequently being compared with, and comparing ourselves to, unrealistic and heavily filtered imagery of attributes, lifestyle, fame, wealth, etc. Perfection which is unattainable. A never ending pursuit for more and better and bigger, but which leads us into disappointment, frustration, exhaustion, nothingness, and eventually mental illness such as depression and anxiety. It is good for us to work on our insecurities and grow stronger and more confident in ourselves, but I think it's is also equally as good to just accept it as a part of being a normal human being, because very much of you we are insecure about and comparing ourselves to, or being compared to, is not reality at all. Hopefully that makes sense. I love your topics, your guests, your views, and your videos in general. Lewis, you are the kindest, most profound, most sensitive, and always interested and interesting host. 💕💕💕💕💕💕
❤My word... you sound like someone who has done the work.
Yes good way of explaining our need to accept we all have areas of Insecuritues and need to accept and work on them..
part 2 pls! validate emotions. be strong enough to support others. it is ok to be a mess. supporting increase your health. work on yourself. work on others.
I love that she is advising parents about having a processing space and not trying to give advice to people. I am in the mental health field and she explained it very well.
Really, really good interview, with some wonderful, intelligent questions by Lewis.Dr Caroline Leaf is very impressive.She has the ability to simply and dissect complex life situations in a relatable manner.This is wonderful.
Thank you for taking the time out of your day to check out the interview! So glad you enjoyed it.
Yes, more about managing relationships. This was not only fascinating, but helps me with skills for responsibility for my stuff.
The unspoken sexual tension between these two is palpable! Caroline's amazing. She sure gets directly to the heart of the matter. Great info. ty 4 vid.
Here struggling years after a divorce I tried apps, got sick & have not dated for years. Thank you for your amazing content.
Bendiciones!
Thank you.Yes to part deux please! Caroline's examples helped confirm how the loudspeak of my own inexperienced mom with unresolved issues when I was her 1st young child really did leave deep scars. At 3&4, I somehow reminded Mom of her MiL (who was the primary reason we emigrated) ....let's just say it apparently resulted in much self-speak of what I did and didn't deserve later in life.
Who tf knew?!
Oh I am so speechless.
I feel this has and will change my life. This is a video I will watch again and refer back to. So much insight. Thank you for posting this. Truly grateful ❤
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
I loved this conversation and so important how to talk to our children and save them to adapt our bad habits! Eye opening for me and was so grate for the tool Dr. Leaf mentioned! Dear Lewis is always so good to tune to your podcast thank you 🙏🏻
I would love a part two! More info on how to introduce this with teens and young adults. This has been fantastic! Thank you!
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PLEEEEEASE do a part 2! 😊 and also ignore that "thumbs down". Ugh.... I tried to hit the "like" thumbs up and accidentally hit the wrong one. I LOVVVVVVE YOUR CHANNEL LEWIS!!! 💖💖💖💖💖
You can always add a thumbs up :) part 2 for sure
So true, I met someone friends comes from broken family or Ignored parents cause their avoidant relationship later on, we have to show love and support by listening and understanding, it’s not our responsibility to heal them but why not be the light to be someone’s life when you can. Thank you for this amazing conversation ❤
After watching this interview, I feel more fulfilled. I think we can also take this into a business aspect as well. Show more empathy. It's okay to show levels of weakness that can ultimately lead to improved team chemistry.
Glad you enjoyed it!
Totally agree! Knowing how to be empathic can help you improve communication with others and create great relationships, making for a positive workplace.
I couldn't agree more! Either it's in personal or professional life, communication is the key! Not just knowing how to do it, but also knowing how to do it RIGHT!
That's true @dotpenji!
Absolutely agree! This interview was truly eye-opening, and I couldn't agree more with the idea of extending empathy and vulnerability into the business world. It's remarkable how fostering a culture of empathy can lead to enhanced teamwork, better communication, and ultimately, improved team chemistry. Acknowledging weaknesses and being open about them can create a space where innovation and collaboration flourish.
Wow super powerful all of it. Lots of notes and awareness. Labels don’t serve us. Yes!!
Loved this video. Incredible content explained in a way where we can work through our trauma and lead healthier lives.
Please create a part 2. Thank you.
🧡
I absolutely love Dr.Leaf! She definitely goes deep ❤️And thank you Lewis for all you do! You rock!
P.s. I would LOVE to see Matthias Barker (he has lots of knowledge about trauma) on this show as well as Alieen (she’s founder of Lavendaire and helps people create their dream life and such) ☺️⭐️
Thanks again!
Lewis, your shows are always heart openers for me… you remind me of me. This ❤️
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
Good evening Lewis and Caroline
Greatest, wee thankyou to Caroline.
Stumbled across your work couple of years ago. Gave me validation both professionally and personally when very much needed.
Truly Grateful.
💜
Thanks for being here!
This was an amazing conversation session. I agree with everything she said. I learned so much! 💕 Thank you! So many parts I identified with, but when she talked about people that gets labeled with mental deceases and that makes them think they are broken, that got me. Because I have seen that happening to a love one! Thank you 🙏🏽❤
I am sorry your loved one experienced that. It can be so damaging :(
I love Caroline, she changed my life. Her book Switch on your brain is great!!
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Part 2 please. I loved the segment that explained how to be present with a child or friend that expresses their experience and how you can valid them and apologize.
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
I am seeing Caroline all over Youtiube these days, love it!! ❤
YOU are the definition of GREATNESS Lewis!!!!! ❤
Thanks! Appreciate you for watching. 🧡
I really needed to hear this!! It validates how I am feeling struggling the past 4 months with emotional overwhelm and chronic illness and anxiety and depression and my relationship with my partner has broken down also. I've started working with a psychologist as I can't get anyone else to actually listen to my problems.
Caroline looks fantastic. Thank you Lewis for asking such an interesting questions.
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ONE CAN NOT FIX SOMEONE ELSE WITHOUT FIRST FIXING THEIRSELF.
LACK OF SELF CONTROL DIRECTLY RELATES TO PEOPLE GETTING INVOLVED WITH SOMEONE THAT DOES NOT LEAD TO HAPPINESS.
SO HEAL YOURSELF AND LOOK FOR HEALED PERSON
THIS LADY SPEAKS PROFOUND TRUTH!!
Wonderful discussion for those who have been diagnosed with a mental illness. It’s not enough to be labeled and then ostracized and seen as weak. These are moments in life we can move out of with CBT neurocycling and presence work. Thank you!!!!
Indeed, a part 2. She is brilliant.
I got to comprehend more from her tonight than in the past when I watched her videos. The neuro cycle is brilliant. Thank you.
You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡
I LOVE my fellow Zimbo Dr Leaf. Excellent podcast on so many levels. Would love a second episode with her!!
You may check out another episode with her here ruclips.net/video/zX4DeCV31YY/видео.html
You cannot heal love issues in you until someone outside of you shows u it’s real. U can’t find loyalty outside of u until someone shows u they have that! Then the hurt person can heal!! Unfortunately healing love isn’t something u can do on your own when ur not the one who broke that. We have to love to heal people. Men need to start loving even if we are broken cuz they are the ones who broke us
Wow, what a wonderful talk. I need to watch and listen to this again.
Working on myself to understand how I could be a better person for me and a better parent to 20 something old kids and a wonderful grandmother. This one is one which I will share with my daughter to help guide her with her children. Wish more of this stuff was available when I was a parent of young children but so glad I’m able to help my children now and apologise for my lack of knowledge (I was a pretty good mum, was just overprotective, which lead to stress and anxiety in me and my children). I will be buying the book for sure.
Thank you so much for watching!
Longtime fan here, and gotta say this is the most profound podcast I’ve watched yet!! Thank you! ❤
Appreciate you and your support🧡
This is probably my frst time watching an interview with Dr Leaf and I learnt quite a lot. I've been doing a lot of studies on brain changes as a result of trauma, and how brain changes affect law of attraction and our ability to manifest, so I loved the earlier section of the video in which she delved into the mind-brain-body connection. I also friggin LOVE her definition of greatness at the end of the video! Honestly I usually don't have the patience to sit through hour-long videos, but I can watch Drs Leaf, Dispenza and Mate all day. Please have more interviews with all three, Lewis. Thank you so much 🙏
30Aug23
You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡
This was an incredible conversation! I’m floored how much I connected to the points made here. Very profound and kudos to asking important questions💯❤️
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
I got both books on Audible, I have 2 boys (10 & 13yrs). I was just thinking about apologizing to kids, and i got my anwer in this podcast. More, please!!
Caring for creative ideas for life, ability to see into something & understand it.
Thank you for posting this. Truly grateful.
You're welcome, thank you for watching! 🧡
@@lewishowesThank u ❤
I have heard many types of therapist and esp. with relationships and she has done a fantastic job at explaining why it is necessary to get therapy in the first place (as many don't believe it is needed or beneficial to look back in the rear view mirror). Also, she proves the benefits of therapy including health and the mechanisms of how it could work and does work. Thank you, Lewis! Thank for another super awesome show and guest! :)
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
Why is the title, they will chase you? I couldn't find anything about that... I'm not sure what to take away.
I wish there was a how-to section.
It seems so disjointed and rambling, I couldn't find anything helpful to use.
I love everything said in this interview and I love evey question Lewis askedto her. It's amazing to see how well elaborated the questions were. He even asked a question that i had. Awesome message!
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
The best podcast i’ve ever seen 👏🏽👏🏽 there’s a lot of information
So happy to hear this! Thank you 🧡
I found this powerful. So nice to hear a South African accent as well
Thanks for being here!
The Example About The 5-year old Girl Being observed as a Cute Little Boy, By an outsider, May have been A Reflection of The Thoughts and Emotions the Child Held within herself as acceptable by her Circumstances & Environment & Familiarization.. (PATTERN & HABITS)
Yes!! SHE CAN BE RE-FORMED❤
IN EVERY WAY ❤
Namaskaram ❤
I loved this and all the wonderful information. Thank you Lewis and Caroline Leaf!!!!,,,,,I am 70 yrs old and still learning how to have better relationships.
You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡
This is a life-changing interview! Thank you so much! Would love to hear a Part 2 ❤❤❤
Please have a Part 2, great to hear positive actions and neuro cycling.
Yes please do a part 2! Interested what Dr. Leaf has to say about CPTSD.
Yes I would love to know her advice for CPTSD
She must be that messiah that most people waiting for.
Sincere and Humble in a good great balance, Intelligent and explanation in a good great balance, secure and stable in a good great balance, acceptance and understanding in a good great balance, i it’s like the equilibrium within me just been restore. 😂😅
Thank you, Dr Caroline Leaf.
such an informative conversation. I only wish the audio was better. I can barely hear her. Thank you.
Trouble is we men are not capable of love we see women as less than a resource to us .women do the heavy lifting that is a fact
The part where she talked about your first relationship spoke so much to me. The problem with me was that I dated 2 young ladies and feel I whose very much in love with both we all 3 had this very shared care and we knew even though it was not socially acceptable it became very private with us wen one of us died erley in life me and the other person morn for a peace of us .relationships is something very different form the individual but something that exist on its own wen you open your mind and hart may give you more than you expect abundance love does not care and may take a path that you do not expect.this is not distinction but something special and rare and a gift of the universe were my2 ladies.
Lewis I think you’re such a great human being and I feel like you and I have VERY almost EXACT upbringings because every question that you asked pertained to me
Please let’s see part 2! Thank you so much for the work you both do! 🙏
Lewis! Man you really have the best people and knowledgeable podcasts / interviews in your school of greatness... This video is now part of my "most important videos" Playlist and I'm in awe of all of them ❤😢 soooo greatful!! 💯 Thank you humans for your learnings, doings and sharings
Thank you Lewis for all your work! This is all true, I am in my 30’s and I am the best example of “childhood issues/trauma! I grew up in Iraq, so you guys can maybe imagine what I went through. Father was physically not available, mother was emotionally not available for me and yeah where was love?! Nowhere! Plus War, deaths and chaos around you! My Story is long, I could actually write a book about it 😂Now I live in New York and every guy finds me very attractive and wanna date me but I reject every one for some unfounded reason😅 my first experience with a man was also terrible so here I am. So my question is: what’s the most effective way to heal? I try with therapy, yoga and meditation, what does really work? Can someone recommend some tools that works? It would be also great if you could invite people who are healed and can share their experience now and maybe the best way to do it. Thank you 🙏
Very much needed this..I have listening a lot of your podcasts…keep doing the good work ❤
Thank you so much for watching! :)
This was one of the most eye-opening, encouraging and understandable ways I have seen this information conveyed.
Thank you both for this valuable insight.
Looking forward to a Part 2…
Thank you so much! 🧡
To me the biggest down falll is too many people would rather anti- depressants.
Taking a drug only......
Does not heal wounds.
I am reading her recent book cleaning up your mental mess and this book has a technique to help to manage your mind and thoughts.
Dear Lewis, I LOVE this podcast. 2 wonderful person in this video. I could listen to the both of you forever and never gets tired! The way you both speaks, the tone of your voice, the peaceful captivating energy!! Thank you for this amazing podcast!
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
If you grow up with things that cause negative thoughts, you have to retrain your brain to let them go and handle things differently in a positive way to change your pattern of thinking, like if you were an abused child and you turned alcoholism to deal with it, that's a negative Way which to deal with it.
If you retrain yourself when you deal with negativity instead of reaching for alcohol, do something you truly enjoy doing to change the chemistry in your body to happy good healthy healing chemicals.
Like attracts like
This Is One Of Your Most Useful & Memorable PODCASTS ❤❤
THANK YOU LOWIE❤
I BLASTED THIS PODCAST TO ALL I CARED ABOUT..
Even TO DOCTORS!! Some of Them Must be Pissed😂😂😂😂😂Namaskaram ❤
Yes!!!
SADHGURU TALKS ABOUT BODY MEMORY.
Dr Leaf, I LOVE HER.
SHE IS A GIFT TO HUMANITY ❤❤
THANK YOU LEWIS
FLORIDA USA
Namaskaram ❤
Thanks for being here!
Carolineee.. your good intentions, kindness and the amazing message comes across, exudes in ur being. Thanks for this. Agree to agreee:)