Narrated D&D Story: Murderhoboing Adventures Of The Worst Party Ever, Dysfunctional Incorporated

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  • Опубликовано: 26 окт 2024

Комментарии • 513

  • @allthingsdnd
    @allthingsdnd  3 года назад +122

    So does your dnd party have a name?

    • @negative6442
      @negative6442 3 года назад +12

      "The Retard Brigade" is usually the default

    • @UndeadSteampunk
      @UndeadSteampunk 3 года назад +7

      I am currently going solo with my dad as a dm

    • @fish3340
      @fish3340 3 года назад +5

      The party fish is part of is called "the fish slayers." Named that after I, "fish," hunted dragons for sport with a dragon slayer maul. My party just rolled with it.

    • @nealbarrett4500
      @nealbarrett4500 3 года назад +4

      Lol we got stuck with “Heroes of RottRam” all because we happened to be on the wrong side of the demon invasion

    • @Just_som_Ottur
      @Just_som_Ottur 3 года назад +2

      The Mistakes
      *trekpalm*
      Thank god the DM is godtier and flexible, else I would’ve left a longggg time ago.

  • @seabass819
    @seabass819 3 года назад +243

    My party's name is "the B team: for when all better options are expended."

    • @Nathan-qp9uv
      @Nathan-qp9uv 3 года назад +22

      well still better off then "the C team: for when everyone else can't be bothered to show up." (i've not had a party with a name but i'm officially considering this one)

    • @jackmack4181
      @jackmack4181 3 года назад +8

      Z team
      The last thing you wanted

    • @JB-ym4up
      @JB-ym4up 3 года назад +2

      We had a group called B team back in 1980, so funny to see it come up again.
      Edit: in retrospect the whole campaign had a sort of "see patrick we saved the city" sort of feel to it.

  • @TealZero
    @TealZero 3 года назад +452

    "Worst party ever"
    *Me, looking to my dysfunctional team I DM* : Finally, a worthy opponent! Their battle will be legendary!

    • @allthingsdnd
      @allthingsdnd  3 года назад +56

      Were they as dysfunctional as your players?

    • @nathanschuler7587
      @nathanschuler7587 3 года назад +8

      It shall be a conflict worthy of Spielberg, Scorsese, and Michael Bay!

    • @TealZero
      @TealZero 3 года назад +22

      @@allthingsdnd well when most are good/neutral and that ONE guy is chaotic evil and plans to backstab the party, not to mention it's everyone's first time playing, I'd say they have a good run for their money lol

    • @fist-of-doom487
      @fist-of-doom487 3 года назад +7

      Their is a D&D Podcast called TFS at The Table, their groups was called The Natural One-ders, due to their consistently crappy rolls

    • @H20Hybrid
      @H20Hybrid 3 года назад +3

      If you have annotations on, at 8:00 after Jorbec doubles the fire damage you see :/

  • @troperhghar9898
    @troperhghar9898 3 года назад +176

    My party has a name?
    My current party: OH GOD WHY
    My best party: The Oncoming Storm

    • @stevenle9960
      @stevenle9960 3 года назад +5

      THE GREAT EXTERMINATOR
      THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS

  • @archer_of_azure
    @archer_of_azure 3 года назад +75

    Bluff skills: off the charts
    Every other skill: dumpster fire

  • @brettpaterson2689
    @brettpaterson2689 3 года назад +159

    Our group is called the "Blue Horny Men" because we have two blue tieflings and a blue dragon born and only realized we were all blue when we me that session 0

    • @SetzerII
      @SetzerII 3 года назад +15

      Tell me Blue Man Group had the soundtrack.

    • @brettpaterson2689
      @brettpaterson2689 3 года назад +18

      @@SetzerII Not quite but I canonically cast thaumaturgy in my ears to create jazz music when we travel or have down time. I also perform as a 20 charisma warlock

    • @Kino_Cartoon
      @Kino_Cartoon 3 года назад +6

      @@brettpaterson2689
      I recommend "I'm blue" just have it on you phone and bring it up in case of any performance or distraction scenario.
      Bonus question are you a los all charisma based classes? Like Bard and Sourcer?
      I was just wondering about the horny part.

    • @theplagued8322
      @theplagued8322 3 года назад +3

      I just assumed it was because they were races w/ horns, but all of them being CHA based would be great.

    • @brettpaterson2689
      @brettpaterson2689 3 года назад +7

      @@Kino_Cartoon tieflings have horns, so does our dragon born. They are paladin and rogue respectively

  • @tatersalad76
    @tatersalad76 3 года назад +69

    My party calls themselves "The Other Guys". That way if an official accuses them of a crime, their response is "No no, we're the other guys.". As they desperately try to bluff their way through it

    • @ashannahensley3288
      @ashannahensley3288 Год назад +1

      How often does that work? (Since, technically they "aren't lying".)

  • @hannesnilsson3897
    @hannesnilsson3897 3 года назад +60

    Party name: the ram heads
    We gained the name after having skipped many challenges and puzzles by just doing the same thing until it worked

  • @DashingSteel
    @DashingSteel 3 года назад +76

    My party's name is The Order of the Silver Blade. Some highlights include:
    -A player strolling into the dungeon KNOWN as a lair of a lvl15 Wizard without using Detect Magic and instantly triggering a fight with his minions, forcing us to join. Then getting trapped in a Force Cage.
    -The same player repeatedly using "I throw BISCUITS at it!" as combat strategy. After all, she didn't get proficiency with cooking tools for nothing.
    -A palladin, obsessed with YEETING people out of enemy's effective range to the point of getting IRL threats from the player seen in highlights 1 and 2
    -Literally everyone having an owl familiar
    -Player immediately vaporizing an important NPC with a fireball on his first turn playing a new character, along with our Yeet-obsessed Palladin (Both survived via Revivify)
    -The Yeet-Obsesed Paladin's second obsession with making Lesser Healing Potions and trying to sell them to everyone or barter them for magic items.
    -Biscuit girl just straight up fucking off into the woods to become a Druid and re-rolling a new character.
    -The Yeet-Alchemist Palladin trying to obtain an infinite supply of troll blood to make potions with by placing a troll's torso into his Bag Of Holding and subsequently losing half his stuff because the torso grew it's libms back and broke the bag.
    -The torso coming back from the astral plane as an Astral Troll and trying to kill the party.
    -Party's total refusal to have a recurring villian (Aasimar Oathbreaker Palladin shadow of one of our dead characters) that made our DM to give us a chance to find a shadow that has advantage on stealth rolls at night. By using owls carrying torches and our Palladin's Divine Senses we found the bastard and killed him. We almost died fighting that thing. FUCK having to fight it again.
    And lots and lots more.

    • @Kino_Cartoon
      @Kino_Cartoon 3 года назад +11

      Please... continue *gets tea and notebook * this is too good.
      The name doesn't indicated such a chaotic party.
      You can tell us their names of you continue.

    • @DashingSteel
      @DashingSteel 3 года назад +15

      Well okay then.
      The party consisted of:
      Liadon-A half-elf fighter blacksmith, son to a single human mother adopted by a dwarven blacksmith
      Yoko- The Yeetman himself, the Potion Man (take me by the hand lead me to the land) and a general flake. Asshole been missing for like 5 sessions or so
      -Tien- The Baking Cleric, also known as "The Annihilator cannon" because she dealt insane damage with Inflict Wounds.
      -Atmos- Air Genasi Ranger, proud founder of "Sitting on the Ceiling Club"
      -Leonard-An aforementioned Aasimar Paladin that died and got turned into a Villain of the week.
      Here's some more highlights.
      -Liadon was fighting the same zombie for 3-4 rounds because he kept passing his death save.
      -Tien once casted Spiritual Guardians while surrounded by enemies and was immediately YEETED outta there by Yoko, effectively wasting a whole turn of spell damage. That lead to the aforementioned IRL threats.
      -Liadon, making all of the party weapons silver to fight specters that had vulnerability to silver weapons (according to our DM anyway) earning us a title of Silver Blades
      -us stumbling upon an ancient section of the catacombs guarded by a talking skull door, then yanking the skul out of it and taking it with us to show it the world.
      -Us obtaining enough Mytril and Adamantine to craft 2 sets of Full Plate for Yoko and Liadon, granting us both AC of 20 at like level 5
      There's more but I gotta go to work. If this gets any likes I'm gonna write more of this.

    • @Kino_Cartoon
      @Kino_Cartoon 3 года назад +2

      @@DashingSteel thank you very much =D!
      Your group sounds like a lot of fun.
      Edit: ^grout yes please so it sounds great :D

    • @DashingSteel
      @DashingSteel 3 года назад +9

      I know it's a typo, but still, Grout is gonna be my next character's name :)
      Anyway, some more highlights:
      -My character, Liadon wasnt as tanky or as damaging as the other characters so I opted to build me a mobile skirmish machine. I picked a feat that allows to use a bonus action to make an attack after using Dash, and a Mobile feat. Every time I ran across the battlefield with my dashing speed of 80 to attack someone I would go "BLITZCRIEG", so now nobody remember the name of the feat that allows me to attack when I dash. Including me. There's only BLITZCRIEG.
      -Also I used my battle master dice quite often to counter my shitty attack rolls by using the "Presise Attack" or however it's called. Basically the one that adds a D8 to your attack roll. Every time I did this I said "Let me elaborate" (it's a wordplay in russian, involving the word Точность and the word Уточнить). It is also a meme now and everybody calls this maneuver "Let me elaborate" even if we play in other games.
      -My Half-elf started the game with a unique sword called Kerim ("Blade" in elvish, or so I've heard). Its essentially a reflavoured Scimitar. I basically Told the DM that one of my side quests would be to customize this weapon or make a superior version eventually. So basically when we found some rare ores in that Skull Door dungeon i crafted an Adamantine blade that i called "An'Kerim" ("An" at the beginning of the word means "Best" or "Superior" in elvish.) and since it was made of Adamantine it dealt critical damage to all inanimate objects. Fast-forward to us getting captured by that wizard. He puts us in cages and doesn't take our items because if he tried we would fight and nobody wanted that. He put us in cages and left to grab something. Well NOT ON MY WATCH! I busted out my sword and straight up sliced and diced the bars on me cage open, then freed the others. BLACKSMITH FTW!
      -We ended up befriending the wizard and as a part of our deal with him he helped us make a mimic with a permanent Demiplan spell inside his mouth. Then the DM made an exception in the rules for us and allowed us to store a mimic inside a bag of holding without opening a portal to the astral plane and stuff. He said the rules didnt specify this specific situation therefore nothing says it should happen. And THEN when we were brainstorming ideas for fast travel the DM himself proposed that maybe we store a mimic inside the bag, then make our familiars carry the bag, enabling us to travel the map without relying on roads incredibly fast and potentially forever, since familiars never get tired or sleep. This idea was so good he had to make a boss-creature made of thousands of undead birds later on because the BBEG found out about the Bird-Bag exploit and tried to prevent us from traveling like that. But we beat him and keep travelling in this matter til this day :)
      -We were carriers of a magic necrotic Plague for a while without us knowing it and ended up having to cure it in order to prevent the entire Faerun from turning into zombies.
      -We had to infiltrate a mine where a crazy Gnome found a way to make a lesser god and tried feeding him souls to make it stronger. That's how our group got our hands on Lasers, Tesla Coil Rods and industrial rail spike guns (We had to fight a bunch of powerful constructs in order to pry them open and Jerry-rig their tools and weaponry for our usage)
      -We fought a giant mech this Gnome created as a last ditch effort to fight back. The whole damn thing overheated and blew up with him still inside. Serves him right for the things he done.
      -We convinced this god (Proodos, god of scientific progress) to stop eating souls and just stick to influencing his domain. He picked us as his ambassadors and imbued our magic items with his power allowing us to speak to DM directly about what buffs we wanna get. My weapon got an ability to reduce a creature's AC by 1 permanently if I hit it with an attack (it doesn't stack, so -1 no matter how much I pummel the bastard) so dubbed it "An'Kerim, the Divider".
      Might have some more for ya later :)

    • @Kino_Cartoon
      @Kino_Cartoon 3 года назад +4

      @@DashingSteel
      I just love your DnD stories.
      My current character is a sorcerer artificer called Finora.
      And our group is called the capeless crusaders.
      We have two evil, two good, my character a true neutral and another one I don't know the alliance from.
      They are the:
      Sourcer re-skined artificer Quaver (human who lived in a mine city and is the best friend of my character because he helped her escape form a temple on which they experimented on her)
      Bard Aileen (halfelf I don't know much about her yet but a high tiers of the guild we are in that I just call the Professor whisper something to her and she just won't tell us! (I can tell you what it was as soon as she tells us) she is more of an lawyer than a typical bard but this makes her interactions pretty funny her player loves to use the Karen "I like to speak to your manager please" card and because she is a jack of all trades it actually works! Still feel sorry for some guards.)
      Ranger Kah (Arakogra who ate a human heart when we first met and had to fight a group of adventures who tried to rob us. I made him a new arrow with repeated shots and his first reaction was to use me as a target. It was funny tho.)
      Rogue Balkas (Elf. A typical rogue up to now. He openly is racist towards humans while complaining about racism towards elf's and he recognized a symbol on a ring we found but he is a new player and we only had 8 sessions so there will probably be more. He and Kah are best friends who once ate bad mushroom they found and became high, because a discussion about dices took too long.)
      Monk Jinyu (Tiefling. She makes great new shoes (which we already took advantage of because someone had to try if the ring we found as a ring of water walking ON LAVA). She pretty nice but pranked us once and it's confusing but somehow that made the group trust her less even so there have been much crazier stuff.)
      And last my character wild Sourcer artificer Finya/Finor (half dragon but because they are overpowered I play as a dragonborn. Her brother and she were the results of the experiments of Daurgothoth a lich dragon who tried to creat a powerful living lichdragon race. He took a bit of the shadow dragon's handbook by trying to create half dragon species that might turn into full fleshed dragons when they are old enough. My brother and I had to be forced to fight each other and learn as much as possible. He liked that Finoras magic was strong but he hated that she couldn't control it. The spies of the God of war and justice figured out he was successful in his attempts to creat living people/halfdragons which showed signs of lichtum even so they haven't died. Because they were fighting a war nearby and didn't want that Daurgothoth could use Finora and her brother as weapons my brother and I got kidnapped while they distracted him and seperarted us.
      They made multiple attempts to reverse the lichtum and made experiments to understand it in hopes that they found a weaknesses, in case the race became a problem. But one of their members took petty and befriended Finya (name change for her escape... Sounds totally different) who was only 9 when she got kidnapped and was imprisoned on the tempel in the mine city until she was 16. Together with Finyas friend and Quavers father she managed to escape with Quaver and is looking for her brother now while trying to hide from members of that one religion and her father. She normally is a really kind person which Daurgothoth described as a defect that will get her killed, but she is pretty hateful towards the religion that tortured her. The religion is supposingly lawful good which probably makes them do a lot of good stuff but Finya is on a revenge page while trying to rescue her brother which is why I made her true neutral, good and bad depending on who she meets but she hates (physical) torture. She'll always aim at a quick death and threaten people without torture (by lies and threat's of death). But first she tries to get stronger. Because she can't always control her magic she turned to what she learned from Quaver and started building and investing instead of only relaying on her magic. She loves that kind of "magic"/technology because she controls it.
      She wears a patch which only covers nearly a quarter of her head and wears a leather gloves over her arm because this is where you can see her skull, bones and flesh surrounded by magic holding it together. Only Quaver knows about the marks but Aileen once saw magic of the typ of necromancy surrounding those parts of Finyas body when she did detect magic but she hasn't talked about it yet.... I would exchange some of the information against what the professor said. I will mostly lie and tell that it's a curse produced by the experiments of my father which is half true. They might figure out more if they inside check.)
      It's obvious but sadly I only know most about my own character and I wish I had as many crazy and great things to tell as you but we haven't played that long yet. If you are still interested I'll of course tell you more.
      We got out name because all of us had some kind of cape, coat etc.. I pointed that out and said "Maybe something with capes" and Jianyus player came up with the name. We thought it was pretty amazing so we ran with it even so we all were capes.
      I just levelled up to an amorer artificer so I'm just waiting for the moment someone points out how ironic our name is but at least one peroson has no cape while pointing at me just so that I can remove the amor in 6 seconds and stand their with a cape of billowing. This moment would be GLORIOUS! (Even so I'll have to pay of my amor first).
      But I'll thank you first for your great tales of the silver blades.

  • @AspieMemoires
    @AspieMemoires 3 года назад +115

    That poor bird. My god.
    Edit: Poor Ivan Jesus Christ.

    • @aaronimp4966
      @aaronimp4966 3 года назад +4

      That poor everyone the party encounters.

  • @BlinPork94
    @BlinPork94 3 года назад +272

    My group called themselves " the fellowship of the memes"

    • @Kino_Cartoon
      @Kino_Cartoon 3 года назад +10

      *All praise the meme God.*
      Followship +1

    • @WeaponizedAutismiii
      @WeaponizedAutismiii 3 года назад +6

      Meme team 6

    • @Leroleroart
      @Leroleroart 3 года назад +4

      I feel you, we are the Powerful Orangutans Grandiose Champions, aka: the POGchamps

    • @nickwolfe6684
      @nickwolfe6684 3 года назад

      @@Leroleroart did you have a goddess refer to your party at least once?

    • @Leroleroart
      @Leroleroart 3 года назад +2

      @@nickwolfe6684 Not a goddess, but right after we got the title of champions the dm took the oportunity to make one of the villains of the campain say "fineee, I guess you are my little pog champs!". The meme was already outdated by the time and it was incredibly cursed as well as funny.

  • @JesusFreak98
    @JesusFreak98 3 года назад +56

    Player: Get my ashes to resurrect me
    Party: We need to throw his ashes into the ocean so he can rest in peace

    • @arcanecontent
      @arcanecontent 3 года назад

      How did they resurrect him in the end if they threw his ashes in the sea? I must have not understood that part or missed something.

    • @JesusFreak98
      @JesusFreak98 3 года назад

      I think they didn't resurrect him kkkkkkkkkkk

    • @arcanecontent
      @arcanecontent 3 года назад +3

      @@JesusFreak98 That they did, but how, given that they have thrown his ashes into the sea? That is the part that I don't understand. I might have missed some key detail, though.

    • @ashannahensley3288
      @ashannahensley3288 Год назад

      @@arcanecontent They accidentally killed the grim reaper, and Pallier came back as the secret Grim Reaper Apprentice.

  • @artemisfowldragon
    @artemisfowldragon 3 года назад +31

    We don’t have a name ourselves, but our dm has our files under “BBEGs in the making”

  • @timothydove7208
    @timothydove7208 3 года назад +67

    I had a character named Gnobody Special the gnome. He was a fighter that like to give acorns to people who he just met. During the time we had four people including my character when the DM asked us for a team name. Two of the other players didn’t care and I bribed the other with 500 gold pieces if they allowed me to name the group. And of course I named it “ The Nutjobs” because why wouldn’t I. Five games later every one except my character has been replaced with someone new and they hate the name. Because of this every time that we stop in to town I get Nutjob merchandise and give them out to people we save. I even got the DM on it so now the more famous our party gets the more everyone knows our name.

    • @VelaiciaCreator
      @VelaiciaCreator 3 года назад +2

      Gnomes really are the best. Pathfinder gnomes are better than D&D ones tho.

  • @psyxypher3881
    @psyxypher3881 3 года назад +69

    Our GM gave our group the name "Destruction Squad" because we would, without fail, manage to rack up a 5+ digit killcount through our actions, usually indirectly but not always.

    • @SetzerII
      @SetzerII 3 года назад +5

      You. Post somewhere so he can do a video how you manage to regularly have 10,000 casualties on a regular basis.

    • @kiritotheabridgedgod4178
      @kiritotheabridgedgod4178 3 года назад +13

      To be fair, it's not the worst thing I've seen, my current party, W. R. U. (Wizard Railgun Unit) have over the course of three campaigns, dropped about 15,000 bags of holding filled with chlorine gas onto a nation, created a portable weapon that only required the use of four level 1 spell slots to essentially do the same amount of damage as anywhere between a MOAB and the Tsar Bomba depending on whether we used a 5lb or 50lb iron ball, made a stationary version of the portable one that ended up having an explosive yield large enough that our DM ruled that it created a black hole, built a nuclear reactor in a medieval setting, used it to create and power enough shit that we ended, at something like level 6, launching a series of essential GPS targeting satellites, a central communications satellite that liked back to our based, and controlled a silo of ICBMs which we then used to nuke the BBEG of the second campaign, and so far in our third campaign(still ongoing) we've basically created a battleship that could only be described as, imagine if the Bismarck had Railguns, a nuclear reactor, and the ability to fly, which we named The Bisremarckable

    • @psyxypher3881
      @psyxypher3881 3 года назад +1

      @@SetzerII I don't think it'd be interesting, considering my group only plays homebrew systems.

    • @SetzerII
      @SetzerII 3 года назад +2

      @@psyxypher3881 If it can be related to or quantified as a D&D/PF game, hell yes he can do it.

    • @VelaiciaCreator
      @VelaiciaCreator 3 года назад +1

      @@psyxypher3881 My group never does premade stuff, the DM just loves world building, or adapting other media.

  • @eringonzalez7277
    @eringonzalez7277 3 года назад +22

    I am currently the DM of a group that named themselves "The White Lotus". And yes that is an ATLA reference. However, quite unlike the White Lotus of ATLA, my party is a group of wannabe heroes who really aren't trying to be heroes quite hard enough. Half of them have sold their souls to various ancient beings with possible nefarious desires, most of which under the pretenses that they will have to adhere to an open favor at some point. They have caused countless problems for the peoples of the towns they have visited, including but not limited to the bringing of an incredibly infectious plague that mutates and transforms people into horrors into a town after our socerer/warlock took a trip to the Astral plane and decided to bring the infection back.

    • @mridontexist5489
      @mridontexist5489 3 года назад +1

      What’s ATLA

    • @eringonzalez7277
      @eringonzalez7277 3 года назад

      @@mridontexist5489 Avatar the Last Airbender

    • @mridontexist5489
      @mridontexist5489 3 года назад

      @@eringonzalez7277 oh, I should have figured that out but I didn’t

    • @Kino_Cartoon
      @Kino_Cartoon 3 года назад +5

      And your short explanation is now a back up plot in my homebrew world. Thank you very much ^^

    • @eringonzalez7277
      @eringonzalez7277 3 года назад +2

      @@Kino_Cartoon Haha! Nice, I'm so glad! Hope it goes well if you ever use it.

  • @UndeadSteampunk
    @UndeadSteampunk 3 года назад +51

    How is everyone doing today

  • @TheNeoVid
    @TheNeoVid 3 года назад +11

    I was in one game where the leader of the party told our first client, "We'll help you, so long as we don't end up on the front line." The results of that storyline led to our naming the group "The Frontline."

  • @TitaniaBird
    @TitaniaBird 3 года назад +8

    The only party I've been a part of that had a name was actually kind of a subgroup name.
    In a 4th Edition D&D group, my Warlock (Albireo, Albi for short) and our Ranger (Cristiel, whose name you cannot spell without "C-R-I-T-S") were the top DPS by far. Since we were both of elven heritage, I joked that we were the Sisters of Destruction. Said name kinda spread to the rest of the group, despite that we were the only ladies in the group.
    When said Warlock ascended to demigodhood, the clerics she inspired took up the title of Sisters in her honor, and the cleric I played (Keyleth Argenta, years before Critical Role began) who was her first and greatest was the Saint Sister, who lived up to her deity's legacy of both destruction and charisma.

  • @medievalpainting801
    @medievalpainting801 3 года назад +8

    I think my party would have been named "Silver Fork" because we killed a werewolf with silver forks.

  • @AxlPatrol
    @AxlPatrol 3 года назад +19

    Bring them back as the main villains of the next campaign

  • @Boom__6678
    @Boom__6678 3 года назад +17

    And I thought my party was Dysfunctional...

  • @JesusFreak98
    @JesusFreak98 3 года назад +4

    Bard: I'm the new mayor
    Secretary: Welcome mayor
    Bard: I'M ALSO BATMAN

  • @ryzukumagawa7143
    @ryzukumagawa7143 3 года назад +21

    Been awhile since I've laughed this hard

    • @fattytan1377
      @fattytan1377 3 года назад

      Ahh that profile pic is kinda weird but ok

  • @jamespurcell295
    @jamespurcell295 3 года назад +5

    My group is called "The Birds of Prey" because my warlock was a servant of the raven queen.

  • @matthewhiatt5070
    @matthewhiatt5070 3 года назад +4

    we've had multiple occasions where call lightning and thunderstep has resulted in the accidental murder of innocent bystanders. We've taken to referring to ourselves as "the electric company"

  • @gravewoodspeaks4276
    @gravewoodspeaks4276 3 года назад +15

    My party name:
    The Crazy, the Snobs, and Depressed

  • @crimsonthemad2940
    @crimsonthemad2940 3 года назад +2

    A party we had for a game I held was called " The Magic Hand" due to it having 5 members all magic classes (a Paladin, a, Bard, a Sorcerer, a Cleric, and an Artificer) one for each finger on a hand.

  • @anthonymitchell572
    @anthonymitchell572 3 года назад +2

    The group I’m with we call ourselves “the wedding party” 😂

  • @order012
    @order012 3 года назад +4

    Better than my dysfunctional party that almost devolved into civil war over a coup d'etat
    (ironically their name was the Arsenal of Democracy)
    The Party had started democratic elections after the Bard made some big mistakes causing dissent and a talking rat called Chester won an election against the Bard. But a lot of time has passed and the original characters are long gone but the system of government stayed. The new Party accepted a truce from a group of assassins to combat a greater threat and the assassins sent Mathias to represent them. Mathias was previously sent to spy on them before (and kind of died) before being made an undead assassin to help. He was pretty charismatic but couldn't win any of the elections cause he was also an extremist far right autocrat (evil people tend to be like that). Then the Paladin (who was rich) had a lot of money and the Alchemist, the current leader, demands he give half for the collective treasure. Normally you'd think that Parties would use collectives to help fund group stuff but not on Mathias's watch. He quickly shifted to appear like a market liberal leaning with the Paladin and won the elections with a slim majority. How naive they were
    *The key supporters necessary to gain power are not necessarily the same needed to keep it.
    It turns out Mathias had no intentions of being a democrat and reverted back to his autocrat ways. He quickly banned emergency elections (ironically how he got elected) and removed a lot of democratic institutions. He also proceeded to take 99% of the Paladin's money* to divide and give it to his key supporters and slowly began making a cult of personality. The Paladin, seeing Mathias steal all his money and ignoring the rule of law, was determined to stop the tyrant he helped create. The Paladin got support from the Alchemist and some other NPC friends (Mathias literally got almost all the PCs on his side barring the Paladin). Their plan was to assassinate him while they were out at sea and dump his body into the ocean. The Paladin succeeded on the account that the Druid on watch was swayed by the rebels and that the Bard who was on watch next didn't report Mathias was missing (not my problem I guess). It was only until the Ranger, a devout follower of Mathias, reported him missing. They couldn't figure out who did it even with a mind reading slaad (Paladin got some mind blank rings or something like that) and most of the people didn't do much about it since Mathias did kind of break 100% of his promises.
    The adventure continued with a leaderless party and the Paladin being the defacto leader. Elections never resumed afterwards but tensions are rising as this popular revolt (that overthrew a democratically elected representative) was similar (no elections). Will democracy be restored or will this just be a series of more dictatorships?
    TLDR: I made Mathias the NPC Assassin win a democratic election but he turned it into a dictatorship so he gets overthrown by the Paladin and his fellow revolutionaries.

  • @gorvarhadgarson5227
    @gorvarhadgarson5227 3 года назад +9

    The Chult campaign I Dm: The Expedition.
    Rime of the Frostmaiden: The Warband.

  • @mileswakefield2298
    @mileswakefield2298 3 года назад +7

    "When assaulted about a quest" Dead LMFAO

  • @michaeljurss4861
    @michaeljurss4861 3 года назад +4

    My players don't have a particular name, but they recognise themselves as Employees of the Cloaked Man.

  • @Mephiston
    @Mephiston 3 года назад +6

    This sounds like a really bad party full of almost all terrible people. Feel sorry for the one player who was the voice of reason.

  • @bishoukun
    @bishoukun 3 года назад +1

    I love that the DM used the same dungeon room that Zee showed us. I laughed so hard once I realized what that room was.

  • @xeno_praetorian868
    @xeno_praetorian868 3 года назад +2

    We, the Silver Scales, spent an entire year trying to stop a rouge god and her cult following from destroying the world with hordes of undead. Finally, after many tough encounters, poor decision making, failed stealth checks, we made it to the end of the story arc where we were set to finally fought the BBEG. However, this was no ordinary BBEG fight. Instead of struggling our way to her (the god, who was no less than 30ft tall) and fighting for our lives and for the survival of the realm, we instead elected to simply teleport to her feet and put her in a box, a feat which we very easily and anticlimactically achieved. We did no damage to her at all; we just put her in a box and left. The End.

  • @SolarDeceptionNetwork
    @SolarDeceptionNetwork 3 года назад +1

    My favorite would have to be “The Gourmet Crusaders” and we keep putting rebranding off. Though we always get a chuckle.

  • @griffen121
    @griffen121 3 года назад +7

    Jesus Christ I was laughing so much I was crying

  • @erinnash4570
    @erinnash4570 3 года назад +1

    My group is called “sanctuary “ we’re all fans of the Legacy of Kain and Castlevania series.
    We’re also one of the most chaotic and random groups I’ve ever seen. I remember the one campaign I was
    DM , it was my very first time. The party was low on healing items and stumbled upon this goblin camp, it was abandoned every one was dead. Whole place destroyed only an ominous glowing cheese wheel was left intact. Long story short it’s now a reoccurring joke known as the cheese wheel of doom.

  • @tlaragihai5953
    @tlaragihai5953 3 года назад +2

    Our party doesn`t have in-universe name (yet), but on meta level we call ourserves "the cursed dice", because we`re playing through roll20 and this VTT on average gives us results below 10. Today one of the players (who previously have made like two successful attacks for the whole 3 combat sessions!) obtained actual real dice and wow, suddenly she started to roll 18`s and 20`s!

  • @nyotamwuaji6484
    @nyotamwuaji6484 3 года назад +5

    The worst party ever
    You found a puffin forest tale of the W.O R.S.T?

  • @christopherandresen9790
    @christopherandresen9790 3 года назад +1

    "The fifth paw" A group of 5 god chosen adventurers that each got a soullinked animal fitting to the character that were their personal link to their gods. We fought a lot of evil and in the end managed to stop a demon invasion but everyone except for my character died resulting in him charing for all the other four animals after going into retirement in his own little arena like home where he trained and helped young adventurers for free (since he made enough with his adventures to last more than 5 lifespans) and sombering and mourning over his lost friends.

  • @nathanielgrindstaff4909
    @nathanielgrindstaff4909 3 года назад

    Stuff like this makes me dread playing in these kinds of campaigns while simultaneously making me feel like I am missing out on a memorable experience. LOL

  • @adamxei9073
    @adamxei9073 3 года назад +1

    I needed this laugh today. Thanks!

  • @TheHyperchip
    @TheHyperchip 3 года назад

    I've had quite a few, but my favourite is our Family Party: Sir Shiny(s) and the Duck and Covers. A Paladin (and later, a Knight) with a gaggle of Halflings. They were all relatively squishy/support. I was the Tank, Knight became the Improvised Weapons Expert/DPS. So I never hid... Many, many antics with that Party (including one of the Halflings being the reason my Paladin went on a drinking binge and landed himself a wife by accident).

  • @BryanCarthell
    @BryanCarthell 3 года назад +1

    In my first campaign we were given the name "Memories of the Universe" my the DM after a certain point in the story. We didn't understand why until the very end of the campaign.
    In my current campaign, we called "The Drunken Dragons"

  • @xientau9028
    @xientau9028 3 года назад +1

    The name of my most dysfunctional group was probably: "Oh no, not those guys!"
    At least, that's what people seemed to yell wherever we went.
    We were... mostly just ignorant, accident-prone murderhobos. ("Oh, so THAT's why you shouldn't use fireballs to clear out a rat infestation in a brewery, wine cellar or warehouse full of flour!")

  • @moogamooga2100
    @moogamooga2100 3 года назад +5

    Hey: I love this channel to death. You’re a great storyteller and you choose interesting narratives. But I’d prefer more happy or epic narratives where things go AWESOME...instead of more variations on “my party or DM or story sucks and here’s why”.

    • @FoxManZach
      @FoxManZach 2 года назад

      Old comment is old, but to be fair, it's easier to find stories about bad D&D sessions than good ones. That and some people find the fails more funny and entertaining.
      Not hating, just saying.🤷‍♂️

  • @ChefVelmoor
    @ChefVelmoor 3 года назад

    Marge and in Charge - Our low Charisma fighter is named Margygren. Doesn't like attention, and really doesn't like being called Marge. And when people say something about him being the leader, another of us, usually my Cleric, 'No he is Marge. We are in charge'. Also our wizard uses Prestidigitation to write our team name in glitter in the air when we introduce ourselves.

  • @Thunderscreamer
    @Thunderscreamer 3 года назад +3

    We are the Five Birds! ...yes, all 6 of us...

    • @Thunderscreamer
      @Thunderscreamer 3 года назад +1

      Come to think of it, 8 if you count familiars & animal companions, one of which being the only actual bird in the party (various new species of parrot every time he has to be resurrected)

  • @cerealguy6359
    @cerealguy6359 3 года назад

    I was laughing so hard but when i was hearing the hawk story i was just dead, it reminds me of those cartoonish stay in the air for a second until falling incredibly quickly

  • @3pef7ty15
    @3pef7ty15 3 года назад

    i love their plan b when the dog rescue fails 😂

  • @reecelongden3500
    @reecelongden3500 3 года назад

    My current party is yet to have run long enough to get a name, but a couple of honourable mentions and their highlights:
    The Order of Fail (or OoF), consisting of a Bard who consistently nat 1'd every persuasion, deception and intimidation check they ever made, a Cleric who lost their faith three sessions in after their God told them to piss off, a Rogue who was so edgy that the party refused to accept them and just followed us around, a Fighter with 5 Intelligence who got tricked into buying plate and mail made from lead giving them disadvantage on EVERYTHING, and my Paladin, the grumpy dad of the party, who only ever used his Lay On Hands to give a single hit point to other party members once they were downed out of hope that this time they'd actually learn.
    The Conquistadors, who completed Fane of the Night Serpent, only to then discover gunpowder, invent the musket and decide to conquer Chult in the name of Eberron.
    The Sword Saints, a party made up entirely of sword-wielding Paladins, Clerics and Fighters because we didn't have a session 0.
    The Breakers of Chains, a group of Barbarians, Druids and Rangers who decided to become D&D PETA.
    And finally, The Second Sons, a party where every PC was the second son (or daughter) of a different minor noble, and happened to all be running from their pasts, again completely by accident due to no session 0. Party members included: a Fighter on the run from this world's Inquisition because they stole a cursed sword, a Cleric who misread their holy book and accidentally preached heresy, a Bard who got caught in bed with the wrong lord's daughter, a Rogue-Ranger who stole a dragon's egg, a Necromancer Wizard who is also being hunted by the Inquisition.
    And tying all of those together, my poor Raven Queen Warlock, who acted as the party's conscious, and made it her life's mission to redeem all of these lost souls.
    She also just so happened to be a serial killer and later also a vampire, but that's beside the point.

  • @anthonylivesay6358
    @anthonylivesay6358 3 года назад

    The Roller Coasters. Double meaning of dice rolling and all the ups and downs we had.

  • @williamfalls
    @williamfalls 3 года назад

    Besides the story of the man and his puppy, sounds like a blast.

  • @ramahan21
    @ramahan21 3 года назад

    It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia in a DnD setting. It must've been a hilarious experience.

  • @crystalla7383
    @crystalla7383 3 года назад

    The group of friends I DM for is "Chaotic Unbalance"
    They weren't unbalanced by any means, I did my best to make sure of that- HOWEVER our first session was a oneshot that I made in a short amount of time and they were all level 1 spellcasters who refused to use any of their spells and instead punch and kick everything (or throw daggers)
    In their (and my) defence, 2 of them had never played before, 1 hadn't played for about 2-3 years and I had never DMed a game before as well as the fact I had never played before too. Everyone had fun though, and at the end of the day that is all that really matters but I've learned a bunch now and hopefully we can actually have a lot more fun, we've even got a new player who is a barbarian and our wizard player is making a new character who is hopefully not a spell caster so we can have some more variety.

  • @echotango9384
    @echotango9384 3 года назад +2

    My group's name is “Completely legitimate business.”

  • @SpaceTrucker91
    @SpaceTrucker91 3 года назад +2

    I’m in a group where every party member is a cleric... admittedly we are all different clerics but clerics nonetheless... we call ourselves....
    The A-men

  • @harkwin9277
    @harkwin9277 3 года назад

    13:00 mark, I have been in that room. No dragon head breathing smoke, but I have seen the button and pushed it to keep a non existing danger away. This part of the story made me bust out laughing

  • @Zarqualyn
    @Zarqualyn 3 года назад

    Hmmm... I've played Werewolf for a time... Our pack was named after our totem spirit. 'Bear-with-Us', not only because Bear was with us, but because everyone had to put up with our antics.
    Played a three year campaign of Vampire the Masquerade as part of a Coven named: 'The Unforgiven' because every member of it had done something that someone else could not forgive us for. (Even if it was just existing)
    A 5th edition group I'm playing in now calls itself: Heroes @ Home, because we started playing because of COVID, but that's just our OC name.
    Over the yesars, I've played in more party's without a name than with a call-sign, and had tons of fun. Sometimes it happens, sometimes it don't.

  • @teal_m_101
    @teal_m_101 2 года назад

    When the first quest involves a crushed puppy, you know it's gonna be... good?

  • @flameloude
    @flameloude 3 года назад

    Oh the glorious countdown puzzel. The worst thing you can give a paranoid party.

  • @roamingrivers7429
    @roamingrivers7429 3 года назад

    I was part of a group called "The Thunder of the Lightning" playing as a Half Orc Barbarian, for a year, meeting up once a week. I'd say our most destructive feat was unwittingly unleashing an army of demons upon a gnomish steampunk metropolis. This incident killed at least 80 percent of the city's population, as well as destroyed most, if not all, of it's infrastructure. We managed to get rid of the demons in the end, after much loss, pain, and effort.

  • @Navy89SEALs
    @Navy89SEALs 3 года назад +1

    In this fictional world, did the NPCs actually know who/what Batman was?
    Secretary: "Gee golly gosh! What an honor Mayor Batman"
    Secretary internal monolog: 'Great... Another Lunatic Mayor...'

  • @willhall1874
    @willhall1874 3 года назад

    I haven't laughed this hard in a long time, my compliments to the author.

  • @MrKevMan
    @MrKevMan 3 года назад

    I love adventures of novelty parties doing redidulous mini side quests and blundering their way to only be killed by the EBG after ruining everything.

  • @toastsniffer187
    @toastsniffer187 3 года назад +1

    The time a cleric tried to exorcise our rogue with a mace......in the middle of a haunted prison.

  • @reapergrimm8
    @reapergrimm8 3 года назад

    In the very first module I ran, I had to tell the NG Shaman that "stealing the unborn is a evil." In the very first campaign I joined as a player, one of the other players kept summoning a horse onto a nearby table whenever he had the opportunity. Completely torpedoing the DMs efforts to construct a quest.
    We're all in a tavern so our characters can meet? Horse on the table, now a bar brawl has broken out.
    The GM somehow manages to convince us to attend a fancy gala as part of a quest? Horse on the table.

  • @MissHadleyHistory
    @MissHadleyHistory 3 года назад

    Our group was called the Lords of Chaos. It was a hilarious evil group that was originally a one shot but grew into a three year campaign.

  • @joshuaaitkenhead1952
    @joshuaaitkenhead1952 3 года назад

    I really want more stories from this group

  • @blazeking1705
    @blazeking1705 3 года назад +1

    The Jerks Emeritus, a party of cracky neutrals that really owned the Jerk part xD

  • @cameronr733
    @cameronr733 3 года назад

    Wow. Suddenly I don't feel so bad about my team. The Titans Heirs, have been playing for about half a year. We got a band of desert bandits, a gnome artificer and his many mechanical machinations, a tribe of unusually sized Orcs, a band of human trafficking bandits, a cult of red dragon worshipers seeking to resurrect a specific red dragon, a Vampire, a mad scientist artificer trying to make great and deadly Warforged, and some crazy wizards looking for a stolen port-key to an ancient city on our kill list.
    However, we also have an island full of amazon-like women doomed by our incompetence to realize the self-destruct countdown was really bad. Like, vaporize the island, bad. Fortunately for us, we had a means of teleporting off the island. The surviving residents...not so much.

  • @lumiknight7719
    @lumiknight7719 3 года назад

    My paladin wanted a homebrew God to worship, turns out he was describing Sheldon from the big bang theory

  • @jordanmcmorris5248
    @jordanmcmorris5248 3 года назад +1

    This was hilarious at first but then it got dark really quickly lol

  • @AuntLoopy123
    @AuntLoopy123 3 года назад

    These stories were hilarious! I almost want that for my own game, just because of the sheer ludicrosity every session. However, I'm sure my group will wind up with some hilarious stuff, as well.

  • @macthemeh
    @macthemeh 3 года назад

    My party decided to call themselves the Razzler Dazzlers of Fantazmaglers. In wasn't for about a year of real time play that they finally got a keep and decided to call it Fantazmaglers.
    "Finally! Our name makes sense!"

  • @ryang256
    @ryang256 2 года назад

    Astronomical brothel dues. Thanks a lot! I just spit Coke all over my laptop. Some even came out my nose!

  • @PlanetFromOuterSpace
    @PlanetFromOuterSpace 3 года назад +1

    This was hilarious! Great stories.

  • @ZorgoXorgon
    @ZorgoXorgon 3 года назад

    I don't have the patience for this type of DnD group, but the game's for all kinds of different people. ALL kinds... haha

  • @kiritotheabridgedgod4178
    @kiritotheabridgedgod4178 3 года назад

    Party names, well there's two that come to mind,
    First Party I ever played with: "Dracodong" long story there, mostly involving our fighter rolling a Nat 20 on a survival check to carve a trophy from a, young if I remember correctly, black dragon, taxidermying the trophy, and proceeding to slide it onto his long sword, so from that point forward he proceeded to smack everything with his long sword, while it was sheathed inside a 7 foot long black dragon penis.
    Second party name: W.R.U. Or to give us our full name, Wizard Railgun Unit. Because for some reason our DM allowed a party of 4 engineers and a theoretical physicist, to experiment with using spells and game mechanics along side real world physics. Turns out, electricity spells + 4 curved ferromagnetic metal quarter pipes + one person to load a 5lb ferromagnetic metal ball + confirming your DM allows the Peseant Railgun rule to work = a portable weapon that we calculated could propel that 5lb iron/whatever magnetic metal we could get our hands on ball, to Mach 5 in the space of the single round

  • @zeniththeantringleader
    @zeniththeantringleader 3 года назад

    Our party name was "Bad Puns and Finger Guns". I will let you imagine the jokes that ensued during the one-shot.

  • @komorebi9809
    @komorebi9809 Год назад

    That poor man beating beaten 2 times when just wanting to hear a song.... Then getting beaten to death by guards after being beaten the second time... I feel pain for this man.

  • @DeusMachina_EXE
    @DeusMachina_EXE 3 года назад

    Silver fury
    We have a somewhat angry paladin of some sort of silver order.
    A druid who is pretty much the literal meaning of nature's wrath.
    A black half dragon, dragonborn who can sometimes go into a blood frenzy. Has some silver on her armor.
    And a Kobold artificer which is pretty much the incarnation of "fuck around and find out".
    We all made our characters separate.
    Despite the angst, each of the characters are pretty goofy in their own way. The Druid is pretty much afraid of everything. The Kobold is literally paranoid and all seeing, while being socially inept. The paladin is pretty honorable for the most part, and is like the groups dad. And the dragonborn when not in a blood frenzy has a heart of gold and is pretty clumsy.

  • @zokerovextis6768
    @zokerovextis6768 3 года назад

    By far the funniest story I've heard on this channel

  • @GlitchedRoyal
    @GlitchedRoyal 3 года назад

    For my, and many of my friend's, first dnd campaign that's still going on 4 years later, we decided to name ourselves In Vtero, Latin for "The Bonded". Kinda cheesy I know, but it'll always hold a special place in my heart!

  • @GCJACK83
    @GCJACK83 3 года назад

    The old man's puppy is Barbas. Yes, THAT Barbas.

  • @shogundante666
    @shogundante666 3 года назад +1

    PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE! more videos like this

  • @casbienbarr
    @casbienbarr 3 года назад

    I would easily hear more tales of such adventurers, failure makes the funniest games

  • @Rexir2
    @Rexir2 3 года назад

    Ah, the countdown room. That's a favorite of mine.

  • @tinyrubi7290
    @tinyrubi7290 3 года назад

    I actually had to go back to my notes to try and remember we haven't had a game since the world caught fire but our part was "Storms-shield" we had a storm genasi, 2 twin barbarian dwarves and a shieldmaiden forge cleric.

  • @pinkiepower1968
    @pinkiepower1968 3 года назад

    Our party name is Mischief, Mystery, Murder, and Mayhem.
    We live up to it.

  • @sherylcascadden4988
    @sherylcascadden4988 2 года назад

    My first adventuring group that had a name: The Company of the Rose.
    My most recent game: Team Stealth (lowest hide in shadows, my mage with 13, highest the goblin rogue/assassin with 26 (hides in his own shadow)) to make maps, disarm traps and clear the way for Team Kaboom.
    Team Kaboom: mostly heavy fighters with an artificer, clear out the monsters and generally murder hobo players with a constructive outlet.

  • @ShadwSonic
    @ShadwSonic 3 года назад

    I've heard a variant of the "push the button" story before... Unlike then, this party seems to have not stopped being crazy afterwards...

  • @desireecaruthers3583
    @desireecaruthers3583 3 года назад

    I have dubbed my party," the four stouges, a bee keeper, and their concerned medic" not as catchy, but it fits

  • @sorapwn1200
    @sorapwn1200 3 года назад

    "The Mistakes", due to how often we fuck... Just.... EVERYTHING up...

  • @catboygremlin
    @catboygremlin 3 года назад

    ironically, my party has a beloved repeat NPC named Mr. White who regularly rolls incredibly low on just about everything.
    his first appearance was partially drunk and wounded in the closet of an abandoned building, his second as a dinner guest in the murder mystery game where he simultaneously was the most useless team member, and also managed the coolest takedown on a monster, and his third as a merchant and partial mcguffin. We'll see what Mr. White gets up to in future campaigns.

  • @thestoopidiot870
    @thestoopidiot870 3 года назад +2

    My party's name is "The working on it"

  • @GoGoJoe16
    @GoGoJoe16 3 года назад

    Someone in our DnD group told the DM to make our name in the campaign the Pretty Ponies ( we needed a name for a competition ). The next day, the rest of us all had cool names, but the DM wouldn’t let us change it. We have been known as the Pretty Ponies ever since.

  • @spencernoble6824
    @spencernoble6824 3 года назад

    It was Trolls LeBeouf. I was dming, and mentioned on a 23 Arcana check about trolls that they might have a Troll Hole. My brother made a Holes joke, and now thinking about Shia LeBeouf, I said that you could try to find the Troll LeBeouf, and thus the party was born.